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 Author Thread: For those that have no qualms snooping to find out if their partner is cheating
 robertkoi
Joined: 11/9/2008
Msg: 35 (view)
 
For those that have no qualms snooping to find out if their partner is cheating
Posted: 12/28/2010 7:26:30 AM
That's absolute insanity on its peak. If a guy finds out that his wife is cheating then SHE should be the one on trial and not him. In some countries she'd shot or stoned.
 robertkoi
Joined: 11/9/2008
Msg: 34 (view)
 
how can a guy that is 48 years old have a relationship that still lives at home with parents?
Posted: 12/28/2010 7:14:09 AM
"Mega creepy. Not the fact that he lives at home, because this happens in some cultures, especially when a person is single. What's creepy is the fact that he still answers to his mother."
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Agreed. That's what I was trying to tell Mr. Einstein earlier, too. Also, I wasn't the one "yelling" loser all over the place, right Albert?

"The part about his curfew is really too much...although Pingshooter made a good point. Maybe Mom has dementia or Alzheimers.

But the posters who say there is NO reason to live with your parent(s) after a certain age, and are so high & mighty about "I don't need any help, no matter what" - I wonder if your kids think the same thing and will throw you into a home when you are old and feeble.

There are PLENTY of reasons an adult may move home, or stay at home. Many are admirable.

And before someone has a snarky question - I've been out on my own since 20. I would have absolutely NO PROBLEM living with my mother if it was needed."
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Well said indeed. Every time you see a little further you get accused of defending a situation or perhaps be in it yourself - just like I was by a thick headed jackass earlier.

Age has nothing to do with it at all. If necessary, I'd say that the worst opponents on this thread would run back to those horrible people in their lives called "mom" and "dad" and beg for help. But yeah, perhaps the REAL victims here would sleep on the street before asking for help. Luckily there are families with stronger ties than that. At least in my family we help each other. In other cultures as mentioned by the above poster it's VERY common to live with your parents until the day you get married. It has nothing to do with incest of being incapable of living on your own or holding down a job... Bla bla bla and all that other nonsense. Just get your head out of your ass.
 robertkoi
Joined: 11/9/2008
Msg: 22 (view)
 
how can a guy that is 48 years old have a relationship that still lives at home with parents?
Posted: 12/27/2010 8:00:36 PM
"You're kidding me right? oh lets see his mommy calling him on his cell if he's not home at a certain time, Im betting mommy pays the cell bill too."
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Hey Einstein, the question was: do you know WHY he's living with his parents? I take it that you don't.

"I've taken care of enough men in my life, so dating someone who is living at home at 48, for ANY reason is a HUGE red flag for me. "
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So you'd choose the street before moving back in with your parents if necessary? As usual people are thick headed about this and a million of other things and can't see the forest for the trees - even in rough times. And before some jackass starts accusing me of something, I'll say this: I don't pass judgements on other people's lives. I live and let live.
 robertkoi
Joined: 11/9/2008
Msg: 19 (view)
 
how can a guy that is 48 years old have a relationship that still lives at home with parents?
Posted: 12/27/2010 7:03:28 PM
^^ What's so much "loser" about him anyway? So the guy lives at home and do you know why? The only problem I had about the story was his mother calling him, etc.
 robertkoi
Joined: 11/9/2008
Msg: 35 (view)
 
When is it too late to have babies?
Posted: 12/24/2010 5:06:33 PM
For a woman it's late after 35 and definitely so once she starts nearing her 40's. For a guy there's no limit at all. Some here write about increased risks and quality of sperm, etc., well those risks don't overweigh the risks a woman faces once she's over a certain age. There are many examples of men (old men) in their 70's and 80's but you don't find a single 80 year old woman giving birth to a child, do you?

Ever since women started weaing men's clothing and tried to take over their roles and positions (or at least pursuing them) this became an issue for natural reasons. You can't have it all. It's that simple. Career hunting, shallowness, greediness and the "walk over dead bodies to get what I want in life" attitude comes with a price in more ways than one.
 robertkoi
Joined: 11/9/2008
Msg: 49 (view)
 
What should a woman smell like?
Posted: 12/20/2010 8:47:57 AM
"What should a woman smell like?"
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Well, vagina I guess...
 robertkoi
Joined: 11/9/2008
Msg: 68 (view)
 
How do you handle the issue of Sexual Protection ?
Posted: 12/16/2010 3:47:11 PM
Using rubber is like eating candy with paper on - worthless and takes away 70% of the experience. It's better to jerk off in that case. People are paranoid about the risks anyway. Stop having sex completely is my advice.
 robertkoi
Joined: 11/9/2008
Msg: 24 (view)
 
When is it too late to have babies?
Posted: 12/16/2010 3:31:17 PM
Well, there is an assh0le, "elite" class in this world and they want to reduce the population on this planet to 500 million people anyway. So what could be better than indoctrination in school to pursue a career and then become a slave (i.e. to start working) and too old to have children. Also, on top of that you have immorality, i.e., the cougar phenomena, dating sites, pickiness, twisted minds, porn, etc. The result of course is increased mortality among newly born as well as the complications in general. In my opinion it's time to go back to the way it used to be, let's say 50-100 years ago.
 robertkoi
Joined: 11/9/2008
Msg: 55 (view)
 
How would you handle a guy who behaves like this?
Posted: 12/16/2010 1:40:31 PM
"Then out of the blue he starts talking about how he loves my voice and asked if I was prude. I am not used to hearing anything like that. I was married for 21 years. My gut instinct tells me this guy is a perve and not to meet him."
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What a load of nonsense. Of course he wants to "boink" you and why should he not? Are you so unattractive or what? Dating is 100% about sex no matter how nice the words are or which wrapping paper they're in. That's what it boils down to anyway - unless you're looking for friends that is.
 robertkoi
Joined: 11/9/2008
Msg: 901 (view)
 
Why do men find it hard to be friends?
Posted: 12/14/2010 6:07:37 PM
Of course he was in for sex, or let's say the POTENTIAL of it, especially when he received text messages, etc. indicating that chances were rather high that it was going to happen. Had he truly been looking for a "quality" woman with integrity, etc., he never would've met her in the first place. Also, he never would've paid for a hotel room with a "fantastic" view either and so forth. All that makes perfect sense. But, does that make him stupid and pathetic? Not the least. I think that a lot of men, AND women, have experienced this in one way or another - myself included.

Depending on what you're looking for, it's very easy to fall for the temptation, the adventure, etc. An "adventure" like that happened to me late last year and (it also started out in a hotel by the way) ended up in a hearthache - a painful story with arguments and bad feelings that stretched into months. As the story often goes it started as a game on a dating site, MSN, phone calls and then the "BIG" plan so to speak. Anyway, the troubles began when the "game" was supposed to turn into something serious. Now, if you weren't looking for a quality person you'll never find those traits in him or her because they didn't matter to you from the very start. She lacked the characteristics for a long term relationship. I knew it from the beginning but decided to ignore it because the game took over - for both of us I should mention.

So the moral of the story is obvious - if you just KNOW that he or she isn't the ONE for you and it's all just a game, you have to make a decision: you can either go along and enjoy the ride, i.e. the time it lasts, OR, you can decide not to go because you want more than that. If you go ahead with it chances are slim at best that it's going to work out long term.
 robertkoi
Joined: 11/9/2008
Msg: 19 (view)
 
Haven't Seen her for 2 Weeks plus
Posted: 12/13/2010 4:19:35 PM
Is it just me or can someone else also smell the bullsh|t here?

Busy, huh? And hardly replies to text messages after three dates and it's been two weeks since the last one... *Laugh* Wake up! You aren't more interesting to her than a rock under her shoe. Look for someone who IS instead. If you don't know what it means to be interested, then take a good look at your own behavior and compare that to hers - THAT'S how someone who's interested will act. Just forget about it and stop wasting your time.
 robertkoi
Joined: 11/9/2008
Msg: 894 (view)
 
Why do men find it hard to be friends?
Posted: 12/10/2010 8:55:02 AM
Aquangold: it would seem like that phone call changed everything, doesn't it? Yeah, she held you as a backup plan and her no. 1 priority turned her down. She got upset because she wanted it all - go behind the other guy's back, have a "sex weekend" with you and then blow you off. That's ONE possible scenario. If not, then what put her in that mood in the first place? At least she could've offered an explanation but I take it that she didn't...

This is what happens when you try to manipulate other people and lie yourself through life - it all comes back and slaps you in the face so many times that it'll make your head spin. She was a worthless woman with no integrity and be glad that she's out of your life. These people are sick about themselves and they spread their "disease" to others as well. You were in for the sex and you paid the price for it. You thought that you could spend the weekend fuc_king her but it didn't happen. Without defending her one bit, but had you looked for a quality woman instead of using the radar on top of your d|ck, this never would've happened. Use this experience and learn something from it. She's not the only worthless woman out there.
 robertkoi
Joined: 11/9/2008
Msg: 157 (view)
 
Dating while unemployed?
Posted: 12/9/2010 5:12:29 PM
Work is slavery - three words for you people to learn.
 robertkoi
Joined: 11/9/2008
Msg: 148 (view)
 
People who don't post their jobs.
Posted: 12/9/2010 4:57:45 PM
"Yeah, but we're onto that one. Smart women will only respond to profiles without jobs listed because the guy either has a high level top-secret CIA type career or is a multimillionaire in hiding looking for his soulmate on here."
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No. Smart women only respond to profiles where there's at least SOME gurantee that the guy's rich and that he's going to beat her up just for fun and sleep with other women.
 robertkoi
Joined: 11/9/2008
Msg: 56 (view)
 
anyone ever taken so long to get over someone?
Posted: 12/9/2010 2:10:47 PM
Well let's see...It's been 9 months since we last talked/texted and since then nothing - not a message, email, phone call - just nothing. I haven't seen her on the dating site where we first met either (and yes I have checked). I'm not a member on Facebook but I created a fake account there once before she and I met and I used it ONCE maybe 2 months ago to see if she was on there - she was.

It was a crappy relationship but the way it ended made it hard to get over and forget nevertheless. I don't know if there is a good way to end a relationship but it can't possibly be to split up on the phone as enemies at least. We probably both expected the other to keep in touch - an email, a text message, etc. It's almost like a stalemate when that happens - who will break the ice..? It didn't happen and quite frankly I was surprised that I never called or texted either.

I've thought about it a thousand times at least. But life goes on. Even though I've dated many women since then, it still comes back. Everything has it own time to fade away. One has to accept that it didn't work and that you'll never see each other again - maybe not even by coincidence.
 robertkoi
Joined: 11/9/2008
Msg: 143 (view)
 
People who don't post their jobs.
Posted: 12/8/2010 8:08:13 PM
"No there is just one reason why someone would want to know what my job is.... which is they are just after money."
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Very often, yes. A rich guy should always smoke out gold diggers by not telling them what he does and see where it leads. Judging by the posts on this forum by the way, I wouldn't touch the women posting here with rubber gloves.

G l.
 robertkoi
Joined: 11/9/2008
Msg: 142 (view)
 
is it so bad to want an OLDER WOMAN??
Posted: 12/5/2010 8:16:24 PM
Older women usually have enough baggage to fill an ocean liner. The funny thing is that they claim that about men their own age. Now that's kind of weird since it usually takes two to create the "baggage" in the first place. Example: A was married to B and they divorced after 20 years. Now, how can A or B have more baggage than the other? It's like two people walking right into each other - who's to blame?

Having said that, the only reason a younger person would have any interest at all is for sex - which by the way isn't even better than with someone your own age. After a 15-20 year marriage there probably wasn't THAT much variation in the bedroom, right? My experience is that women over a certain age so scarred that it doesn't surprise me one bit that a lot of men their age and older don't want to deal with them at all.
 robertkoi
Joined: 11/9/2008
Msg: 122 (view)
 
Dating while unemployed?
Posted: 12/5/2010 8:03:13 PM
As I stated before - work is a complete waste of a person's life. It's a waste of energy and it's pointless. Nobody will raise a stone after you're gone anyway. It's slavery. So you want to date and you're unemployed, huh? (whoever you are) What's the problem? Shallow women? Come on, they'd be shallow anyway. If you make millions they'd be like vultures on a corpse tearing off any piece that's left. If you don't make millions but you're still employed your job doesn't have enough status. *laugh* Who wants to date a gold digging prostitute like that anyway? Not me.

Just get out there and date your brains out unemployed or not. Besides, one thing doesn't necessarily have to exclude another, i.e., trying to become a slave (i.e. getting a job) and have a social life such as dating men/women on the side.
 robertkoi
Joined: 11/9/2008
Msg: 851 (view)
 
Why do men find it hard to be friends?
Posted: 12/2/2010 9:34:04 AM
aquangold: it sounds like you were disappointed when you had to "remind" her that you were just friends. If she'd been a guy you would've had no reason to remind him of anything, right? I mean, only because she downgraded you to a "friend" didn't mean that you couldn't go out with her. I don't blame you though. When you want more and only receive crumbles from the table it's better to just walk away and look for someone who will give you what you're looking for. "Friends" only works when both feel exactly the same way - you didn't because you wanted more. For her it was enough, at least there and then.
 robertkoi
Joined: 11/9/2008
Msg: 86 (view)
 
Should I stay or should I go????????????????
Posted: 12/1/2010 7:00:44 PM
"Should I stay or should I go"
---------
...Sounds like a song title.
 robertkoi
Joined: 11/9/2008
Msg: 125 (view)
 
Just looking for friends
Posted: 11/30/2010 9:07:52 AM
"Looking for friends" is code for: looking for a way into your pants.
 robertkoi
Joined: 11/9/2008
Msg: 347 (view)
 
I am noticing a trend in women over 30
Posted: 11/29/2010 7:33:09 PM
"Not true. My older friends (30s and 40s) date younger guys for many reasons. More fun, more hair, less baggage, less chauvinism, etc. "
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And men who date and marry younger women can claim exactly the same things so who's right?
 robertkoi
Joined: 11/9/2008
Msg: 345 (view)
 
I am noticing a trend in women over 30
Posted: 11/28/2010 2:24:44 PM
"I don't think it's one specific reason; for ten women you will have ten different reasons for this to be.

Not sure about the ego thing; as in here we get literally flooded with offers from people under 25, (maybe they think we're not hearing from anyone?) who pretty much just offer sex because they love older women and you are being picked solely because of your age; nothing ego producing in that at all. Most women I know roll their eyes, but some I know bite.

Some women I know go for younger because well, to be fully honest, they kept hitting men their age and older that couldn't um finish; and they wanted more energy.

Some it is because their activity and energy level overall was really high and the men their age and older were more sedentary and wanted to do more laid-back, homebody things. They wanted someone that could keep up with them on an activity level, and the younger ones seemed to be better able to do that.


I personally could care less about age and I have a range both sides of me and have found age is a number. It's not because they're younger or older. It's who they are in spite of it. But if anyone approaches me solely because of my age (the older woman cougar fantasy) I break contact automatically. I've lost count of the offers and they don't flatter, thrill or ego boost me in any way. That being said I have had extremely enjoyable dinners with people in their early to mid 30s who were in my field, had similar interests where discussion was broad, varied, engaging and I very much enjoyed myself. Not because of their age; the age didn't have anything to do with anything at all. But that is way different than the being offered to hook up by someone 20 years younger purely because you're an older woman.

So there may be a trend, but for as many people who do it; I know two to three times as many who won't. So it might also be just the circle of the poster giving their answer; it's different depending on the woman, the area and the men that are available to those women. To each their own."
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Well, would you date an 18 year old boy who just happens to say the rights things at the right moment? Probably not. Would you set up a date with an 87 year old man for the same reasons? See, age DOES matter...

Women reach a point (not all of them), a sort of one last immature phase in life when they wish they were 20 again and start acting accordingly. The guy on the other hand (in THOSE particular cases that is) has passed that stage in life and matures. He doesn't want to hang around the bar as he did years and years earlier. Instead he wants to do other things because he understands that no matter how many times he goes to bars, clubs and gets drunk with young girls, it'll never make him younger. It looks pathetic. The woman on the other hand doesn't see it that way. She doesn't see it but they laugh behind her back. It really looks hilarious. So, she then makes up an excuse and calls him boring, lazy and inactive because he refuses to turn into a teenager again. All that talk about being so active and interested in this and that and that men their age can't keep up as some of these women claim, is utter nonsense. The only reason, as said, is that he doesn't want to act like an immature, little boy anymore.
 robertkoi
Joined: 11/9/2008
Msg: 85 (view)
 
30 Something Woman Being Chased By 19 yr old Male
Posted: 11/28/2010 8:19:55 AM
Fake thread - too nuts to be true.
 robertkoi
Joined: 11/9/2008
Msg: 191 (view)
 
I like Older Women because........
Posted: 11/28/2010 8:17:02 AM
"I think this is more likely to be the reason when the age difference is really large. Such as 21 yr old man contacting a 45 yr old woman. But I don't necessarily think a 35 yr old man contacting the same 45 yr old woman is just looking for sex. Some people have broad age ranges or prefer to date older / younger up to a certain point."
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...No reason to get into such extremes as 21-45. I'd say (% sex): 21-45 (as your example) = 100%, 21-30 = 99%, 25-35 = 85%, 30-40 = 75-80%, 40-40 = 45%, etc. In other words, sex is ALWAYS part of the dating world. However, when the difference in age becomes less significant, even though there's still a high percentage, the approach will be completely different and more acceptable to both. Why? Well, for one thing you're dealing with a person your own age or let's say + - 5 years and there's a lot of common ground.

Dating a much younger/older is always about sex because there's no common ground, life experience and chances are lesser than slim for it to ever work out in the long run. Exceptions? Of course, but VERY few.
 robertkoi
Joined: 11/9/2008
Msg: 186 (view)
 
I like Older Women because........
Posted: 11/27/2010 9:27:50 AM
It's not SOME who are just looking for sex. That's THE reason when a kid contacts a cougar who responds positively.
 robertkoi
Joined: 11/9/2008
Msg: 209 (view)
 
Why do older men have dirty minds?
Posted: 11/26/2010 6:06:33 PM
"Why do older men have dirty minds?"
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As do cougars.
 robertkoi
Joined: 11/9/2008
Msg: 78 (view)
 
Dating while unemployed?
Posted: 11/26/2010 6:02:42 PM
Work is slavery and a waste of time and energy. Unemployed, stupid, ugly, beautiful or not, get out there and date as much as you like. Pleasure and joy comes before anything else.
 robertkoi
Joined: 11/9/2008
Msg: 49 (view)
 
Why the constant hesitation to meeting?
Posted: 11/26/2010 5:30:16 PM
"Why the constant hesitation to meeting?"
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Options, someone else in the wings, priority, interest, intent, etc. Time really doesn't matter. You can spend months talking and see it go down the tubes on the first date. I also don't believe in fast dates, i.e., on the same day or evening. I guess the best is somewhere in between, let's say 3-7 days. It's definitely so that a lot of people have no intention whatsoever to actually go through with a date in the first place. They spend hours every day sucking up ego boosts from desperate members. They love the silly compliments and flirts from strangers and become addicted to their inbox.

So, YOUR job as a person who actually spend your time looking for a date/partner is to smoke these liars/losers/abusers out. How? Well, set up a date fast - again 3-7 days. If it hasn't happened by then it's probably never going to happen. Simply look for the signs, e.g. taking forever to reply to a message, online flakiness, doesn't show up sometimes in 3 days or so, expresses interest but never actually "gets there", makes up excuses every time (of at least often), says "goodnight" after chatting and still hangs online afterwards, logs in without either replying or sending a message to you, hardly ever visits your profile, if there's a guestbook - posts no comment, etc. etc. A person who's truly interested will invest time on YOU and if they don't, the signs will be there - guaranteed.
 robertkoi
Joined: 11/9/2008
Msg: 9 (view)
 
How long can you be FWB without feelings
Posted: 11/25/2010 4:40:53 PM
Why would anybody want to waste 4 years of his/her life screwing the same one without any feelings? That makes no sense. It'll hinder you from actually getting some quality into your life. The same d|ck in and out for 4 years without commitment - why? Let's face it, that's what it is nothing more nothing less. If you spend that long banging the same person then why the heck not form a relationship? No feelings, huh? Then for crying out loud move on.
 robertkoi
Joined: 11/9/2008
Msg: 754 (view)
 
Why do men find it hard to be friends?
Posted: 11/25/2010 4:33:01 PM
Friends first is putting the carriage before the horse and it makes no sense at all if you're looking for a romantic partner, i.e., a lover or something serious and long term. Many dating gurus for example go as far as saying that too many hugs will make her believe that all you want is friendship and nothing else. Then imagine what they'd say about the "friends first" approach... Why would a guy want to put himself in the dreaded friend zone in the first place?

Anyway, it's a damn fact by now that the only way for a friendship to work out between a man and a woman is when there's no attraction whatsoever. The crazy thing is that that situation hardly EVER happens. Why? It's time to take off the cotton gloves, cut the bull$hit and say this: because it takes an "ugly" woman, and not THAT many guys out there want to hang around kissing an "ugly" woman's ass, right? That's right. He gets nothing out of it, though I can't see why she would reject him in the first place unless she considers HIM ugly as well.
 robertkoi
Joined: 11/9/2008
Msg: 743 (view)
 
Why do men find it hard to be friends?
Posted: 11/24/2010 3:09:18 PM
Namrael: "That one-sided sexual interest doesn't change the quality of the non-sexual connection that we have."

Abelian: "I disagree. From your perspective, you're getting what you want out of the relationship. Your friends who are sexually interested in you are not getting what they want. They are only your ``friends'' because they think you might change your mind. Why would anyone be friends with a person when the relationship is one sided and one person is not getting what he/she wants out of the relationship (apart from people who are needy or who aren't really friends, but merely people you know and chit-chat with occassionally)? I consider my friendship valuable, so for me to form that kind of relationship with someone, it has to be a two-way street. If I'm sexually interested in a woman, the price of my friendship is her sexual interest in me. I don't need friends who only call me when they need something from me."
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Exactly.
 robertkoi
Joined: 11/9/2008
Msg: 735 (view)
 
Why do men find it hard to be friends?
Posted: 11/24/2010 7:20:09 AM
What some people (women in particular - at least in public) don't get through their head is that if there's attraction why would ANY guy want to be friends and nothing but friends with a woman he not only wants to have sex with, but also start a relationship with? Even if it's "only" sex that's bad ENOUGH, okay? It's even worse when she KNOWS it as someone was very open about a few posts earlier. It doesn't take much brains for a woman to figure out that if she'd give him the "okay signal" he'd be all over her even after months of kissing her a$$ so to speak. What kind of denial or blindness she chooses to live under as a single is her problem, but if there's a boyfriend involved who doesn't quite fancy the idea that her so called male "friends" would bang her brains out if given the chance, then it's not only her responsibility to drop them out of her life but also in respect for him. All this makes perfect sense and I wouldn't call a guy who feels about it that way controlling one bit. Anybody with some self respect would give her the chance to get rid of them or he walks.
 robertkoi
Joined: 11/9/2008
Msg: 729 (view)
 
Why do men find it hard to be friends?
Posted: 11/23/2010 8:25:58 PM
^ Maybe because you belong to that category.
 robertkoi
Joined: 11/9/2008
Msg: 230 (view)
 
Do nerds actually have girlfriends?
Posted: 11/23/2010 8:15:31 PM
Yeah yeah yeah, and at the end of the day nerds come last anyway no matter what the women post here.

Anybody who calls himself "nerd" is just someone who decided one day that since he sucks with women, barely has any friends and likes to collect stamps, that's he's smarter than everybody else and therefore labels himself "nerd" as an excuse. As for IQ tests, I believe that a lot of people feed off of that for the rest of their lives and seriously think that the mind is so simple that any test in the world would measure intelligence as if given by God himself on a stone tablet.
 robertkoi
Joined: 11/9/2008
Msg: 358 (view)
 
At what age do you Just Give Up?
Posted: 11/23/2010 8:04:20 PM
Well, look at this way: no matter how bad it is for you you'll still have a chance. If you give up, you won't and you get nothing. As long as there's life there's hope.
 robertkoi
Joined: 11/9/2008
Msg: 727 (view)
 
Why do men find it hard to be friends?
Posted: 11/23/2010 7:59:58 PM
"I have many male friends with whom I am not at all interested in being sexual with. Some of those are interested in being sexual with me, but we've talked about it and they know what my boundaries are. Regardless of one-sided interest, they are my friends. "
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They're "friends" on YOUR terms. Here's just another example of somebody who can't see the forest for the trees. This thread is basically about why men can't be friends with women in the first place and we know why... Just like in your case, they'd get into your pants the second you'd give them the "okay flag" - and that's not good enough, i.e., if it only depends on you. It doesn't surprise me one bit that a lot of guys have a hard time with so called male "friends" that his girlfriend might have.
 robertkoi
Joined: 11/9/2008
Msg: 709 (view)
 
Why do men find it hard to be friends?
Posted: 11/22/2010 9:19:48 AM
It's not about creating something out of nothing with a stranger. It's about what you're after. Are you looking for friends of the opp. gender on a dating site when you're single? Why should you unless you're looking for a fu|k buddy. Of course it takes time to get know a person but you can't just put that process on autopilot either.
 robertkoi
Joined: 11/9/2008
Msg: 272 (view)
 
HELP ME - GIRLFRIEND HAS BEEN WITH TOO MANY MEN??
Posted: 11/21/2010 8:14:20 PM
"Have a look at most women's profile headlines on here... most are looking for my soul mate, no players please, honest only... why do you think this is?... its because they have all been cheated on or been mucked around."
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So men have never been cheated upon, huh? Are women so innocent in your mind or do you just hate being a man or what? Women cheat and have cheated on men at least as much as men have cheated on them. Don't be a complete fool. And by the way, what a woman tells you (or writes) doesn't always have to be the truth. *laugh*

"As ya say, most blokes will cheat given half the chance, while most women will stay faithful!"
-----------------
Most guys, huh? You must be talking about yourself. You're probably a feminist, too - praising women and their rights and bashing down on men. You need a reality check, dude.
 robertkoi
Joined: 11/9/2008
Msg: 48 (view)
 
Why do guys think you should take your profile down after one conversation with them?
Posted: 11/21/2010 8:02:21 PM
It's controlling and posessive as long as two people aren't together and there's never even been a discussion about it. However, it's not controlling and posessive if they HAVE decided that they're together and yet one of them is still on the dating site for the same reason as before they met. Yeah, at least I'd have a big problem with that because I'm not looking for an open relationship.
 robertkoi
Joined: 11/9/2008
Msg: 35 (view)
 
lots of contact before first date
Posted: 11/21/2010 4:20:31 PM
It's close to impossible not to build up an image of somebody or have any expectations at all after several days of contact. First of all it only makes sense to talk as often as you can before a date, or at least if the other person lives far away. I've "been there" many times and yes, IRL is a BIG step to take from the Internet. Reality is always different. I've never dated somebody who was exactly the way I'd expected. However, there have also been times when reality was even better. The only way to avoid all this is to simply set up a date early on and keep the contact rather short, e.g., 15-20 min. a day over the phone, emails, etc. But even then one's mind can easily start drifting away.
 robertkoi
Joined: 11/9/2008
Msg: 15 (view)
 
dating: friendship to intimacy
Posted: 11/18/2010 6:20:39 PM
"Does it make sense to date more than 1 person at the same time span, until such time that
intimacy develops in one of those friendships?"
------------
Intimacy in a friendship? So you set up a friendship and then wait for a chance to boink her brains out? Well, I guess that's the case with most male-female friendships though.

Anyway, personally I prefer to date someone whom I've established a good contact with exclusively rather than turning every rock looking for another one to do the same with.
 robertkoi
Joined: 11/9/2008
Msg: 68 (view)
 
How do you know if someone truly loves you?
Posted: 11/18/2010 6:11:29 PM
By their actions.
 robertkoi
Joined: 11/9/2008
Msg: 74 (view)
 
i didnt mean to do it...
Posted: 11/17/2010 5:01:55 PM
Calm down, folks. She's long gone.
 robertkoi
Joined: 11/9/2008
Msg: 3 (view)
 
i didnt mean to do it...
Posted: 11/16/2010 8:26:17 PM
"i didnt mean to do it..."
----------
That's probably what a drunk driver would say.

As for the rest of it, one word: foolish.
 robertkoi
Joined: 11/9/2008
Msg: 121 (view)
 
looking for older women but why?
Posted: 11/16/2010 6:27:52 PM
I could write a novel about younger women vs older women, etc. My conclusion after many dates as well as short relationships with both is that older women play exactly type of games you'd expect from a much younger woman. Maybe they're more settled in life with a house, car, a job, kids old enough to be out their own, etc., but that's basically it. I mean, if those were the goals in life then what's next? To find a younger guy to screw, play around with and justify it by bashing down on men their own age by calling them old, grey and boring? That's no justication because it's a complete lie in the first place. It's not because someone else is grey and boring, it's because SHE is bored with her OWN life and blames it on someone or something else. Her frustration comes out in all kinds stupid shapes and forms, including sleeping around - as if THAT would make her happier. At the end of the day she's just the same old woman she was before she chose that path late(r) in life.

As for baggage, of course younger women have less baggage. They're less scarred, they don't carry around so many disappointments, no man bashing and all that stuff. Even though they don't have the same life experience as an older woman, but hey, some older women (cougars) don't seem to mind that so why should men their age care? Young flesh seems to be more important than common ground and experience in life for these individuals. So yeah, it's 99% about sex. If someone wants to belive that a 15-20 years younger has much interest beyond that I wish you good luck indeed.
 robertkoi
Joined: 11/9/2008
Msg: 20 (view)
 
lots of contact before first date
Posted: 11/13/2010 6:37:08 PM
*Laugh* It sounds like you're talking about my most recent date...

It was a long distance "thing" to begin with. We met on a dating site, sent some mails back and forth and soon exhanged phone numbers and shortly after that webcam sessions on Skype. She was exactly the way you described... She sent several messages each day saying that she couldn't focus on her job, etc. etc. Sometimes it was just too much. I tried to keep a low profile because from experience I know that even if you've seen someone on the webcam, talked, texted, etc., there's still the IRL phase left.

When we met it was okay and nice but it wasn't "WOW" from either part really - at least not from me. But we kissed and said hi. I staid for 2 days at her place...

I just think that dating is 100% about sex. If you remove that one and most important factor - no dating. It's that simple. All that tension that she was building up was indeed in her mind, BUT, she was also expecting sex and of course I wasn't planning on to reject her. Men are very easy to manipulate and women know it. I use to drift away and I enjoyed the mind games, the build up before the date, etc. Nowadays I'm a heck of a lot more relaxed and sit back and just take one thing at a time. I don't listen to stories anymore, such as, "I'm looking for a serious relationship. I'm tired of all the sleazebags out there who aren't serious," etc. etc. It makes you laugh within yourself when you're in bed boinking like rabbits. What happened to all that talk about looking for a serious relationship? Then, when she's had enough she talks about chemistry and that she's not finding any no matter how hard she tries. *laugh* Well, she never even TRIED! It wasn't her intention from the very beginning.
 robertkoi
Joined: 11/9/2008
Msg: 68 (view)
 
People who don't post their jobs.
Posted: 11/13/2010 6:16:18 PM
Well, on the positive side if someone posts his/her career and how important it is, then it's easy to forget about it and move on to the next. There's no way that I'd date or start a relationship with somebody who hardly has any time to invest in the relationship in the first place. It even makes you wonder how they can find time for dating at all.
 robertkoi
Joined: 11/9/2008
Msg: 98 (view)
 
Friending an ex on facebook
Posted: 11/12/2010 6:31:54 PM
"You just gotta be willing to recognize and accept they are doing something that you might not like."
------------------
Right, and keeping an ex or several as "friends" on FB is what this thread is about (and especially the EX that the OP's talking about - and THAT'S one heck of an ex, eh?). It's a tough one for sure. I certainly wouldn't like it. I don't even like the whole concept of FB in the first place. Somebody's bound to screw up and go too far if both are spending valuable time on a nonsense site such as FB. All relationships today in 2010 would be a lot healthier without sleazebags behind each corner. Get rid of of them, i.e., delete FB, dating site account(s) and other questionable online activities. And yes, if someone wants to cheat it can happen anywhere and that's true, but it's also much easier to get caught in real life than it is on the Internet.
 robertkoi
Joined: 11/9/2008
Msg: 183 (view)
 
I like Older Women because........
Posted: 11/11/2010 6:46:54 PM
datd00d: I hate to burst your fantasy bubble but you're totally wrong about the games, being less shy, confidence, etc. I can tell you that in most cases they're WORSE than younger women - believe me. It's a complete misconception that "mature" women are better - and how could they be? Not only do they drag along a ton of baggage of letdowns, divorces, separations and other things that life has thrown at them over the years. Many of them are so scared that they're anything BUT confident. Younger women have yet to go through all that so it makes perfect sense to see it that way. And since men and women don't respect each other the same way as in the past, life experience doesn't seem to be worth much anymore. As for the sex - same thing there as well. Why? If she's been married to the same guy for 15-20 years, how could she be more experienced than a single (younger) woman? That idea also doesn't make sense.
 
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