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 Author Thread: Men height vs women weight
 windchymes
Joined: 11/29/2008
Msg: 532 (view)
 
Men height vs women weight
Posted: 10/17/2017 8:16:08 AM
Problem in here is people don't allow themselves to "truly care" about anyone until the physical specifications have been met. Because physical characteristics are what makes a good relationship doncha know.
 windchymes
Joined: 11/29/2008
Msg: 103 (view)
 
Narcissitic Personality Disorder or Psychopath
Posted: 10/12/2014 10:28:59 PM
Your therapist gave you good advice. Keep following it, it just takes time, maybe a few months, maybe a year or two. You've probably heard the old adage "Time heals all wounds". It does have some validity, it just takes time for the edge of the hurt to wear off. Physical wounds don't heal overnight and neither do mental wounds. Just keep surrounding yourself with good people, nice people, healthy people. If/when you do start new relationships, keep your eyes open for the signs and skate out of there if it starts to happen again.

They can really do a number on you, definitely.
 windchymes
Joined: 11/29/2008
Msg: 23 (view)
 
2 months ?!!!!!!!!!!!!
Posted: 10/12/2014 10:15:26 PM
Most likely that he is involved with someone already. Disappearing unexpectedly in the middle of conversations is a classic sign of that.

Another possibility is that he has simply sold you a pack of lies and he realizes he's busted if he continues on.

When people are serious and into you, they make time to meet. Excuses are just excuses not to.
 windchymes
Joined: 11/29/2008
Msg: 10 (view)
 
not sure what i should do
Posted: 10/12/2014 7:49:44 PM
It sounds like she's gotten to know you well enough through texting that you've become more of a friend, not someone she feels drawn to romantically. It sucks, but better to find out now than before you get more invested emotionally.

If she (or anyone) is really into someone, they can't wait for the weekends to get there so they can spend time together. Saying seeing you weekly is too much, she's just.......not into you that much. Very likely she has her eye on someone else. Sorry.
 windchymes
Joined: 11/29/2008
Msg: 71 (view)
 
Sorry but you live too far away !
Posted: 10/12/2014 7:41:00 PM
I had that happen recently. His response to my email to him was that it all sounded great, but Mapquest said it would take him 47 minutes to get here and he didn't want to spend that much time on the road. Gosh. I wanted to write back and offer to meet him on the north side of town, cut it down to 43 minutes or so, or pray for good tailwinds to shave a minute or two off the time, but I didn't. I wished him well.

I still think if I was smokin' hot, he'd be willing to drive 53 or 54 minutes, though.
 windchymes
Joined: 11/29/2008
Msg: 26 (view)
 
Sent msg to 'trust issues/not interested'. GOT A RESPONSE - ?! recommended approach?
Posted: 10/12/2014 7:23:53 PM
He has already shown you that he is not interested in you, he has trust issues, he didn't know who you were when you texted, he had moved on. So. If anything rekindles and then he dumps you again, he is going to come back at you with "I told you I had issues/wasn't interested in a relationship all along, you knew that." He's going to use that as an excuse to use you for whatever he can get and then move on because he never was interested in a relationship with you in the first place.

I'm not trying to be mean, just realistic. Sometimes the "ones who got away" got away for a really good reason.
 windchymes
Joined: 11/29/2008
Msg: 44 (view)
 
Met man, need advice
Posted: 10/4/2014 7:55:55 PM
So you got drunk and screwed. Jimmy Buffett would be proud.

You pretty much presented yourself as an alcoholic who puts out on the first date and then you just tell him to call you if he wants to do it again. He loses interest and you blame it on the fact that you're Hispanic? Come on. At least take responsibility for your own actions. Instead of all of us painting him as a dog, maybe he was a nice guy who was looking for a respectable woman, not one with a drinking problem? I'd be extremely turned off if a guy showed up to meet me for the first time with alcohol on his breath.

Getting lit up in your car outside a bar before you even go inside to meet someone new hardly makes a good first impression. He didn't act much better by getting drunk, too, but he probably figured, she is, why not?
 windchymes
Joined: 11/29/2008
Msg: 39 (view)
 
** STDs, should POF introduce a new tab for it? **
Posted: 9/6/2014 5:11:47 PM
It's nice that you have good intentions by going public with the fact that you have an STD. However, another side of the story to consider: Personally, I wouldn't want the rest of the world to know that the guy I'm dating has an STD. It's no one else's business except his and mine. Even if I didn't catch it from you, there could still be somewhat of a guilt by association by small-minded people....."better not date her, she was with with the herpes guy and she's probably got it too now."

No, I do not think we need a separate tab to announce it. It can and should be brought up in one of the first private conversations you have.
 windchymes
Joined: 11/29/2008
Msg: 109 (view)
 
because people who take the easy path...are easy.
Posted: 8/24/2014 10:12:49 PM
This is true, debt and finances isn't a conversation topic for a first date. My mind was envisioning "venting" on someone who I had already established a dating/friendship with. But STILL....even though it might have been brought up at an inappropriate time, it still doesn't automatically mean she's looking for a handout! :)

And we already know guys are horny, even if he doesn't mention it ;)
 windchymes
Joined: 11/29/2008
Msg: 107 (view)
 
because people who take the easy path...are easy.
Posted: 8/24/2014 9:21:14 PM
This woman described in the OP may have been hinting for a loan, but just because someone talks about having a little bit of hard luck financially doesn't mean they're asking for help with it. Sometimes it's just conversation, venting our troubles, looking for a little bit of sympathy or commiseration, not a handout. Just need someone to talk to, not his money.
 windchymes
Joined: 11/29/2008
Msg: 14 (view)
 
Talking to a girl in an Open Marriage looking for fun...
Posted: 8/24/2014 9:11:56 PM
If they truly have an "open" marriage, then her husband shouldn't mind sitting down and talking with the two of you, just so you know that he's truly okay with you banging his wife.

It will be a little awkward, but less awkward than the conversation you'll have when he's pointing a shotgun at the motel door.
 windchymes
Joined: 11/29/2008
Msg: 53 (view)
 
Introvert vs. Shy/Anti-social
Posted: 8/24/2014 8:35:09 PM
An introvert enjoys listening to what other people say and doesn't necessarily want or need to contribute to the conversation unless he has something really valuable to contribute.

A shy person wants to contribute, whether it's valuable or idiotic, but they are too afraid to do so.

An anti-social person doesn't want to be there at all, lol.
 windchymes
Joined: 11/29/2008
Msg: 76 (view)
 
Banks finding more ways to rip you off.
Posted: 8/24/2014 8:25:39 PM
Forgot to mention.....one way to avoid the ATM charges is to get the cash when you're in a store that offers cash when you're checking out, like the Mart's, major stores, etc. It's free. I hardly ever use ATM's anymore, I just get $20 or $30 when I get groceries.

I didn't read all 4 pages of posts, so if this has been said before, pardon my repeat :)
 windchymes
Joined: 11/29/2008
Msg: 75 (view)
 
Banks finding more ways to rip you off.
Posted: 8/24/2014 8:22:20 PM
I'm a big fan of Huntington, though I didn't know they charged if you didn't go paperless. I went paperless when I signed up, lol.

What I do like about them, besides the free basic checking account is their 24-hour overdraft forgiveness. You can sign up and if you do bounce something, they will immediately email and/or text you to let you know and you have 24 hours to put money in to cover the overdraft. One time, I didn't get the text because my phone was dead, and by the time I realized it was dead and got it charged up again, it was about an hour past the deadline, and they charged me the overdraft fee. I called them to plead my case, asking if they could pleeeeeeease waive it, since I hadn't gotten the message in time, and that I would go to the bank on my lunch break and put the money in, and they agreed! They credited it back to me that afternoon.

They are also great about getting your money back if your card gets stolen or your account gets hacked. When it happened to me, though it was only about $350, they took my report and I got all my money back. My elderly aunt got hacked in the amount of $8000 (!!!!) and it took a little longer, but she got every penny back. They gave her $2000 right away for living expenses and tracked down the hacker, who supposedly is now in prison, and my aunt got the rest back.

I am totally happy with Huntington and intend to stay with them for good.
 windchymes
Joined: 11/29/2008
Msg: 38 (view)
 
Menopause, Slow Metabolism and Weight loss
Posted: 8/24/2014 7:56:48 PM
I hear ya with the mother-of-the bride/groom dresses, what a nightmare, lol! I went through it for the second time last year and am SO glad they're both married off now and I don't have to go through that again! Luckily, I came from a generation where we sewed a lot of our own clothes, so I was able to make my own dresses, and they were okay, but I still felt fat and ugly.

Back on the topic.....I have found that's it's not diet near as much as it is activity. Even walking can work miracles. In the long haul, diets just don't work. We all lose weight quickly and it's great for maybe a year, if we're lucky, but without exercise and activity, the body will find a way to adapt to the diet we're on and will start putting the pounds back on. Some people are swearing by those FitBit's that motivate you to be active. I'm considering getting one.

And a big YEP to the food sensitivities. I dropped about 30 pounds a couple years ago (has it been that long? lol) by greatly reducing or elimiating wheat from my diet. And the weight hasn't come back. I haven't lost any more, either, but at least that 30 didn't come back, lol.
 windchymes
Joined: 11/29/2008
Msg: 14 (view)
 
Going 'Raw Food Diet', need some help!
Posted: 8/24/2014 7:45:02 PM
I don't mean to sound so negative, but if you don't like eating that food to begin with, you're really not going to last. Especially going cold-turkey. That's the problem with "diets", eventually hunger and appetite win out, and most people just don't last because they're HUNGRY, lol.

There are gazillions of healthy eating plans out there, like paleo. My niece and her family follow it. It's super-lean and healthy and so much more pleasing to the palate. Or another one of the many available. Why be so extreme?
 windchymes
Joined: 11/29/2008
Msg: 7 (view)
 
Vanilla Fudge,Iron Butterfly,Black Sabbath,Deep Purple,Led Zeppelin
Posted: 8/24/2014 7:17:48 PM
Goo Goo Dolls. Nuff said.

(About bad names, not the quality of their music!)
 windchymes
Joined: 11/29/2008
Msg: 9 (view)
 
Bring back the long unkemped hair/beard...
Posted: 8/24/2014 7:16:39 PM
I'm not a fan of beards myself, anyway, but especially the long, frizzy, unkempt ones like the Duck Dynasty guys. Ick.
 windchymes
Joined: 11/29/2008
Msg: 31 (view)
 
What's with this whole Country music phase a lot of women are into?
Posted: 8/24/2014 7:14:07 PM

Notice how just about every country song on the top twenty countdown has a reference to alcohol in one way or another? The only common thread in country music nowadays is getting drunk. Some even mention drinking and driving.


And a train. And a truck. And prison. And mama. :)
 windchymes
Joined: 11/29/2008
Msg: 22 (view)
 
Did I rush asking her out?
Posted: 8/23/2014 9:12:22 PM
It's more likely that she's IN a marriage and is just looking around in here to see what's out there.
 windchymes
Joined: 11/29/2008
Msg: 18 (view)
 
Saw her online
Posted: 8/23/2014 9:09:48 PM
I don't understand why people who go online "just to see if he/she is online" and find that he/she IS online never consider that maybe he/she could be going online line to see if THEY are online. Why do they always assume instead that he/she is in some kind of a cheating frenzy, while they are only checking up on the other?
 windchymes
Joined: 11/29/2008
Msg: 5 (view)
 
Seeming uninterested vs. clingy
Posted: 8/23/2014 9:03:22 PM
My opinion is that they weren't that into you in the first place..... no offense, it's just part of dating.

If a guy is really into a woman, he's happy when she shows interest (within reason, of course). If he's into her and she acts aloof, he usually falls all over himself trying to win her over. Not into her and she acts aloof means he's probably relieved and moved on.

Best thing is to just be yourself and let what happens happen. It's not about "being" or doing a certain thing or things to make something happen.
 windchymes
Joined: 11/29/2008
Msg: 14 (view)
 
So how do you meet people in a new town...
Posted: 7/27/2014 7:03:30 PM
When my son moved to another state a couple years ago, when he was 28, the first thing he did was find a group in the other state that were also transplants from back home who were fans of the same NFL team, and they got together every Sunday at a sports bar for football. Even though their team was the Browns, he had a great time, met a lot of like-minded people right away who became friends, could offer him tips and advice about where to go and what to do in the area.

I think he just found them by googling, and he has since bailed on the Browns and jumped on the Falcons bandwagon, his local team now.
 windchymes
Joined: 11/29/2008
Msg: 12 (view)
 
BJ Technique passive or aggressive?
Posted: 7/27/2014 6:38:40 PM
Gags happen, it goes with the territory. Even when the guy is laying dead still. It's no big deal. I'd rather take a few small mishaps and know that he enjoyed it than to be all prim and proper. Even if you don't gag, the suction and activity usually opens up the sinuses and they start to drain, so that has to be dealt with. Quite possibly the real reason they call it a "blow" job.

A wise person told me once, if your nose isn't running and you're not choking on your own snot,you're not doing it right! ;)
 windchymes
Joined: 11/29/2008
Msg: 35 (view)
 
she went through my phone and broke up with me
Posted: 7/27/2014 6:32:27 PM
Sounds like you dodged a rock..........errrrr, a bullet.
 windchymes
Joined: 11/29/2008
Msg: 25 (view)
 
Why are so many people disillusioned with relationships?
Posted: 7/27/2014 6:30:44 PM
[Actually, I think many more people are disillusioned with "online dating". Week in and week out, I see the same exact faces on the "Your weekly matches" email. I've messaged almost everyone of them, yet gotten no response. I think what it comes down to is that so many are on here (and elsewhere) expecting to find an ABSOLUTELY perfect man (or woman), and because a guy has a receding hairline, or he is 5'11" instead of 6'0", or he owns a Camaro, and not a Mustang, or he has one tattoo instead of two, or he makes $60,000.00 instead of $61,000.00, or....... Ad infinitum / ad nauseum........

You get the picture.

So they keep coming back, and ignoring every guy who messages them because he has some miniscule flaw that they all consider a "deal breaker", and become disillusioned after spending 10 years online searching, yet ignoring all the guys. (Same can be said for many guys I'm sure).]

Aaaaaaaaaaaand when we reach the age and maturity level where we no longer do these things, they want someone younger. lol
 windchymes
Joined: 11/29/2008
Msg: 70 (view)
 
Creepy behavior or normal in world of social media?
Posted: 7/12/2014 4:52:14 PM
So, is he purposely seeking out photos of attractive teenagers or do they just appear at random and he "likes" them in the spirit of the moment and then forgets about them? When he "likes" them, are they readily accessible where he can repeatedly go back and look at them, and/or can he save them to a file to return to at will? Or do they just get a "like" tally and disappear? (I don't have an Instagram account, no idea how it works in there.)

I suppose there's no harm in him "just looking" and admiring, but if it seems obsessive, or if he's saving hundreds or thousands of photos of attractive teenagers that he doesn't even know in a file to go back and look all the time, I think that's a little weird.

Best case scenario, he's just got the 'kid in a candy store' mentality and is getting a few jollies from looking at all the pretty pictures.
 windchymes
Joined: 11/29/2008
Msg: 4 (view)
 
Dating and Medical Issues
Posted: 7/12/2014 12:41:45 PM
I would be surprised if a 50-year-old man or woman DIDN'T have any medical issues. It kinda goes with the territory of getting old sucks, lol. Most of us over 50, and quite a few under, have high blood pressure, diabetes or pre-diabetes, high cholesterol, bad backs, bad knees, sexual dysfunctions, prostate dysfunctions, menopause, and so on. Any or all of the above, lol. There aren't many people in our age group who aren't on at least one medication.

So, it really shouldn't be a surprise to anyone if they have realistic expectations about dating people in our age group.

I personally feel that the second date isn't the time to spill your guts about everything. I don't think there is one hard rule about when the 'right' time is, it just is when it feels right. What would be a turn-off for me is if someone told me they had diabetes and high cholesterol and then ate a big,heavy, fat-laden dinner with a gooey, rich dessert right afterwards. I'm not opposed to an occasional splurge, but if it looks like he has the health issues and then throws sensibility to the wind, that would bother me.
 windchymes
Joined: 11/29/2008
Msg: 30 (view)
 
holidays(and the new girlfriend)
Posted: 7/6/2014 6:16:00 AM
Bringing your bf/gf to family gatherings is traditionally a sign to the family that you're serious about the person you brought and want him/her to meet your family because you might be thinking about taking things to the next level....whatever that may be.

It's only two meals. You're not going to blow up like Violet Beauregard in Willy Wonka just from a couple big meals in one day. Just eat and enjoy the day. If you must, just cut your portion sizes. Pick and choose what you eat: you can eat mashed potatoes and corn anytime, save the belly room for the special yummy dishes you don't have the rest of the year. Or eat lightly the day before and or after. It's really no big deal and you're not on the fast track to obesity.

As far as the other holidays, you always have the "eve's". Some families celebrate Christmas Eve's and others Christmas Day. If you're lucky, your two families will be compatible that way. If not, you can trade holidays, like T-giving here, Christmas there, and switch each year. Or, if you do end up married someday, maybe you can have one big family gathering.

And when it's all over, the health clubs always have specials for membership after New Year's.
 windchymes
Joined: 11/29/2008
Msg: 19 (view)
 
Choosing between 2 people
Posted: 7/6/2014 6:03:52 AM
Personally, I think you should start working on your own trust and fear issues before you think about trying to commit to anyone. It's really not fair to any woman to enter into a relationship with her with a bunch of "ooooh, I have trust issues and I'm scared!" baggage. That usually ends up punishing an innocent person for sins of others in the past.

For what it's worth, I think #2 sounds like the better match because by working with her, you've gotten to know her over a couple years on more of a friendship level. She sounds more content with herself and her life, based on what you said here. #1 sounds like she just fits items on the checklist so you think you "should" be with her, but I don't think you feel the chemistry of a romantic relationship.
 windchymes
Joined: 11/29/2008
Msg: 13 (view)
 
Retire threads? Why not retire old ones.
Posted: 7/6/2014 5:43:33 AM
From experience on several message/chat forums over the past 12 years or so, you're damned if you do and damned if you don't. If you're brand new and start a topic that has been hashed over repeatedly, you are told to do a search for that topic. But if you do a search, pull up an old thread and post on it, you are scolded for resurrecting an old thread.

The reality is, the majority of people don't sign onto a site like this and study the Terms of Service or the Policies and Procedures. They say they do, but they don't. They've got something on their mind and you know how when you've got a problem, it feels like you're the only one, lol. So they just start a new thread.

Also, as someone else said, it's the engaging in conversation that makes sites like these much more interesting than just googling something. If they just wanted information, they can search the whole web. They want conversation, so they go to forums because they're more personal. Even got photos of who you're talking with! :)
 windchymes
Joined: 11/29/2008
Msg: 9 (view)
 
Listing what you do NOT want...
Posted: 7/6/2014 5:24:00 AM
It depends on the list and what they don't want. I don't mind brief statements like "non-smokers only, D & D free, no long-distance/within XX number of miles, etc." And limits on body type (no fat chicks!) are just not going to go away.

But when they start on rants like "If you're a psycho hose beast gold-digger with half a dozen brats with different fathers, don't bother, move on!", to me it sounds like they've got baggage from past relationships that they haven't dealt with yet. Sure, we've all got baggage, but why scold and lecture people in your profile that you haven't even met yet? (I actually saw that once in a profile, lol)

Another one I hate: "Don't waste my time!" Hey, your time is no more valuable than mine. We all have to put the time into cultivating relationships and weeding out the bad ones.
 windchymes
Joined: 11/29/2008
Msg: 43 (view)
 
How long does it really take men to commit?
Posted: 7/5/2014 1:33:05 PM
There really are no hard and fast rules. I've heard stories of how some men dated a woman for years but never made the commitment, they broke up, then he met someone else and they were married in six months.

A man commits when he decides he wants to be in a committed relationship. You have to decide what you want and set a time frame for yourself. If he's not in the same place you are, then you have to decide if you want to stay in the uncommitted relationship with him or break it off and start over with someone new.

I avoided using the phrase "decide if he's worth waiting for". He may very well be worth it, but he may never get to the point where he WILL. It's a tough decision :)
 windchymes
Joined: 11/29/2008
Msg: 17 (view)
 
I don't understand the signals this girl has sent
Posted: 7/1/2014 5:54:02 PM
Like the others have said. Call her and talk to her. Or text her if you can't bring yourself to dial the number and use your words and voice. Just DO SOMETHING! Don't sit back and wait for her to do all the work and then complain because the relationship never went anywhere. It takes two people to ride a teeter-totter.

Think of it this way: If she was into you at all, she'll welcome you contacting her. (CALL her!) If she wasn't into you, it didn't matter if you contacted her or not, she wasn't interested. You will know for sure and can move on.

WHEN you do call her, ask her if she wants to get together again. If she says yes, take it further, set up the date! Don't leave it dangling and open-ended! You'd be surprised how many people do this. Or even more so, if SHE suggests or hints at getting together again, don't wait for her to set it all up. YOU ask when, pick a time and date, say Saturday night at 6 p.m., either meet someplace specific or see if she wants you to pick her up where she lives. Pin it down, don't leave it vague. Don't say things like, "You want to hang out sometime?" You'll both be wondering what's going on. Make it specific, a game, a movie, a burger and the arcade, whatever, pick an activity and a date a time and pin it down.

If she drops a bunch of hints and you don't take the hints and do something, she's going to lose interest quick because she'll think you're not interested.
 windchymes
Joined: 11/29/2008
Msg: 15 (view)
 
Question About a Girl
Posted: 6/24/2014 3:16:53 PM
Just because you think you sound like the description someone writes fits you to a T doesn't mean that SHE thinks it does. You've rolled the ball into her court a couple times now, her deleting your emails is your answer: she's not interested. If she was interested, she'd be writing back to you. Don't take it personally, don't analyze it to death, just move on.

If you keep pining away for someone who isn't interested in you, you're going to miss it when someone comes along who is.
 windchymes
Joined: 11/29/2008
Msg: 3 (view)
 
How to take a slow relationship??
Posted: 6/24/2014 3:10:23 PM
I would think if she stops answering your calls & texts, and/or starts giving excuses for not seeing you every time you ask, then she's probably not interested any more. Especially if the reasons start sounding lame. Of course, things come up where she can't always make it, but if she wants to see you, she'll probably suggest another time to get together if she can't make it when you suggest. When people dig each other, they usually make time to get together. If she just refuses time after time, she's probably lost interest. And at that point in time, it's best to just ask her directly if she's still interested and get it over with if she's not.
 windchymes
Joined: 11/29/2008
Msg: 46 (view)
 
Should I ask him out for a coffee?
Posted: 6/15/2014 3:30:26 PM
What stands out for me is that it sounds like he has had all kinds of opportunities to make a move and he hasn't. If he wanted to, he would. It might be that he just enjoys talking and flirting a little or whatever he's doing, maybe he's just a really friendly guy talking to what he considers an attractive woman, but whatever the reason, he's not making the move. For this reason, I see no problem with letting him know where you'll be if he still wants you to cut his hair, but I wouldn't give anything else another thought. Just chalk it up to one of those "moments". :)
 windchymes
Joined: 11/29/2008
Msg: 12 (view)
 
How to stay off Facebook...
Posted: 3/11/2013 6:00:18 AM
You're not addicted to Facebook, you're addicted to wanting to know what all the people on your friends list are doing and saying. Try paring down your friends list to only those who are important to you, who you would WANT to hear from frequently, and who actually have something interesting to say. If your list is full of people you went to grade school with, who you worked with 10 years ago, or who are friends of friends of friends who only friended you to get their friend count up, delete all of them. Quality,not quantity.

If the people who "only" communicate with you via Facebook don't hear back from you, and if it IS important for them to hear back from you, they'll use regular email or the phone.

And, use a little logic. People still get engaged and married, even if you don't read about it on Facebook. It's going on anyway. So what's the big deal about reading it on Facebook?
 windchymes
Joined: 11/29/2008
Msg: 15 (view)
 
New to dating websites. Need advice
Posted: 3/10/2013 9:05:40 AM
It's not about the time frame, it's about the level of enthusiasm shown by the person you messaged. If she seems lukewarm in her reply(ies) then it's probably not the right time to press for a phone number. If she keeps replying but still lukewarm, she might be interested but is a poor communicator. You might try, after a few emails, to give her your number and suggest that she give you a call if she would like to talk on the phone.

If she's very enthusiastic in her emails to you, it's probably safe to ask if she wants to move to phone talking. It's been my experience many times that the guy gives me his number and tells me to give him a call if I feel ready. That means more to me than him just asking for my number so he can call me.

If things seem to be going well and moving forward but then she freaks out if you ask to talk on the phone, she's probably nuts.

Basically, if it's a day or two of good emails, go ahead. If, after several days or a week or so and you don't get the warm and fuzzy "call me" vibe, then it's probably best to move on. There is no time frame rule.
 windchymes
Joined: 11/29/2008
Msg: 7 (view)
 
contact
Posted: 3/9/2013 6:28:07 PM
That's the problem with that whole ****buddy concept. It only works when both partners feel no emotions for the other person and have no expectations of anything when they're done ****ing. It's an empty, void relationship of nothing but ****ing.

If one partner has feelings for the other and lets him or her **** him or her because it's better than no contact at all, then it's almost guaranteed that they're going to walk away from the whole thing feeling "used"....even though they encouraged it and allowed it under the other one's terms all along.
 windchymes
Joined: 11/29/2008
Msg: 20 (view)
 
Advice Needed?
Posted: 3/9/2013 6:16:59 PM
Glad it's all working out, OP :)
 windchymes
Joined: 11/29/2008
Msg: 8 (view)
 
Was he a player?
Posted: 3/9/2013 3:00:03 PM

I don't get why he would join a social group an hour from home when there are ones in his hometown.


This one's easy. It's because he's already creeped out all the women in his hometown, so he now has to travel to where no one knows him.....yet. LOL
 windchymes
Joined: 11/29/2008
Msg: 14 (view)
 
Advice Needed?
Posted: 3/9/2013 2:52:26 PM
I am curious as to exactly what the OP means by "shave" down there. Do you mean every bit totally shaved bald or would a trim suffice? And even "trim" could mean many things, from just cutting all the hair back to a shorter length to shaving some areas completely and trimming the rest, to leaving just a landing strip.....or whatever.

Keeping it totally shaved is kind of rough for many of us. It can cause horrible razor burn, rashes, ingrown hairs and really intense itching. There are products on the market to ease this, but they really never worked for me, I got the ingrown hairs and itching anyway.

I always liked the sticky wax strips, had the best results with those. Nair for bikini areas worked pretty well, too. But shaving....ugh.

I will close by saying that I also believe that a real man never asks a woman to do something he wouldn't be willing to do himself, just sayin' :)
 windchymes
Joined: 11/29/2008
Msg: 10 (view)
 
Question for the ladies...
Posted: 3/8/2013 5:48:04 AM
She doesn't have the ambition to hold down or look for a job or a home of her own, why would she have it to try to maintain a relationship?
 windchymes
Joined: 11/29/2008
Msg: 27 (view)
 
I need a womans help here
Posted: 3/5/2013 5:50:28 AM
Instead of trying to fill the void in your heart with an old habit that didn't work out after eight years, fill it by working on yourself. Go to therapy if you have to, figure out why you treated her the way you did and why you were willing to settle for someone who really didn't make you happy and who you didn't really make happy.

Grow up, cut your losses, move on.....and next time, think about what you say and mean it before you say it. Now you know you sometimes get what you ask for. If you do find another "friend" like her, treat her like someone you want to keep this time.
 windchymes
Joined: 11/29/2008
Msg: 16 (view)
 
My cat
Posted: 3/4/2013 5:42:37 AM
Thank you to those who posted Rainbow Bridge and the St. Francis prayer. I cry every single time I read Rainbow Bridge...even now, lol. I truly believe there absolutely is a heaven for all animals and I cannot wait to see all my old and dear friends again there someday.

Taking your pet to be put down is the most loving final gift you can ever give it. It's very quick and painless and it allows them the dignity of a peaceful death. Animals are very accepting and understanding of the cycle of life and death. You did the right thing.

I'm so sorry for your loss. I've been through it many times, and will go through it many more times before my own life is over, I'm sure.
 windchymes
Joined: 11/29/2008
Msg: 11 (view)
 
Please Help--I'm confused about American Weddings (the gifts!)
Posted: 3/4/2013 5:35:26 AM
Not only do registries give the suggestions of what the bride wants and needs, they are also supposed to mark off or delete from the list the gifts that have already been bought by others so duplicating doesn't happen.

As someone else said, in this day and age in this country, a gift card is always welcome, and some people prefer them. That way, if there was a gift that they were hoping to receive, but did not, then they can use that card to buy it for themselves.
 windchymes
Joined: 11/29/2008
Msg: 19 (view)
 
I need your help
Posted: 3/4/2013 5:27:59 AM
She liked you and wants to go out with you again. She would not have texted you to say this if she was not interested. She said 'sometime" so you wouldn't think she was being pushy and demanding. She was doing what we call "putting the ball in your court", which means "I want you to ask me out again, please!' :)
 windchymes
Joined: 11/29/2008
Msg: 19 (view)
 
appearances
Posted: 3/4/2013 5:19:44 AM
Make-up isn't supposed to be a decoration to attract the opposite sex. It's supposed to be applied in a way to tastefully highlight your good features and minimize flaws to make you feel good about yourself, which usually has the benefit of attracting the opposite sex. But what constitutes good features and flaws is subjective, and it's still the decision of the wearer whether or not she wants to highlight, minimize, or wear make-up at all.

Bottom line is to just be yourself.

The impression I get in here is that a full-body pic of a good figure will WAY out-trump a head shot in full make-up, lol. I see a lot of guys with skinny girls who have faces that aren't exactly what I would call attractive....
 windchymes
Joined: 11/29/2008
Msg: 9 (view)
 
Are we wannabe councilors or just really bored
Posted: 2/12/2013 6:40:50 AM
Because I like to write and I think I give great advice, lol. Many of you will probably disagree and that's fine. It's not an ego thing, it's just a little bit of fun.

I've thought about blogging. Or, if I could find a less-restrictive forum to post in, I'd jump into it. Seems here, a lot of people, and moderators, prefer blandness, coddling, and repetition to a little bit of humor or a strong, no-nonsense opinion about a topic that is posted.

So, to answer the question, yes, maybe I am a counsellor-wannabe AND a little bored, lol.
 
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