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 Author Thread: Rejection...
 TheEvolutionOfJessi
Joined: 8/29/2015
Msg: 35 (view)
 
Rejection...
Posted: 12/7/2017 6:10:26 PM

Honesty can also be tactless depending on the individual and whether they're wanting to be direct or just an insulting a$$hole.

Tactful and honest - "Hey, I'm just not feeling an attraction."

Honest, but tactless - "I would f*ck Ron Jeremy's dirty gym sock before I would f*ck you, you hideous swamp donkey."


damnit Pig... I spurted coffee out my nose with that one....
(thank you, it's the longest time POF has made me laugh)

on topic... years ago I used to hang on every word, nay every individual letter making up a message sent to me.... rejection came hard... ghosting even harder.... The hardest was when a bloke walked out on me after a big birthday dinner... citing "inability to deal with my son"....

Within the last couple of years... huge changes and now, I have no qualms if someone disappears... I recognise that I dropped down their list of priorities... Conversely - I have halted 'chats' when the other party doesn't give me anything of content to reply to... and just recently I've been blocked when I disappeared for a couple of days (power fail) and couldn't get back to respond to them.

I'm beginning to live by the mantra - no response is still a response....
 TheEvolutionOfJessi
Joined: 8/29/2015
Msg: 595 (view)
 
1 month again returns but does he want to date me?
Posted: 1/26/2017 7:33:08 PM
Seriously folks, this 'discussion' went on for two months????
Ya gotta be chytt'n me!!!
Did "him" and she ever catch up???? (I think not...)

Now to 'catch up' while Nat is in hiatus getting her new profile phased in.
(apparently I have a LOT to catch up on... and no liquor!!!)
 TheEvolutionOfJessi
Joined: 8/29/2015
Msg: 176 (view)
 
1 month again returns but does he want to date me?
Posted: 12/20/2016 4:07:08 PM

heavy metal is a turnoff? Rats, I still love Dokken, Lynch Mob, Queensryche and Within Temptation. I'm screwed.


Dang, I loves me some Within Temptation.... they're a great tempo for my running training...

Meanwhile, back on subject of 'one month' guy... or should we say "minimum effort man"... Nat, as we (well, some folks do) say down here in Aus... calm yer t!ts... he's making minimum effort to get maximum effort out of you... I suggested back on your birthday to ditch this guy... and I'm suggesting same again...

personally, if I was getting bombardments of "'how interested in me are you??" texts...' I'd be viewing that as needy and manipulative... and definitely not replying as it would keep me in a text conversation... I do 'face-to-face'.. no dramas...
 TheEvolutionOfJessi
Joined: 8/29/2015
Msg: 179 (view)
 
The Pickle Jar Bluez
Posted: 12/3/2016 11:23:35 PM

And THIS is why I stick around to read the forums.


Currently in the middle of moving house, and only one of them has internet aka forum access - thanx for making a $h!ttµ job bearable...
and I think I'm down to back yard eggs and pickles in 'this' house...
 TheEvolutionOfJessi
Joined: 8/29/2015
Msg: 5 (view)
 
Anyone else in Australia actually having success?
Posted: 11/27/2016 10:12:41 PM

Define Success


Ditto to GCDeb & Ginger... hidden profile for me, and seeing 'same ol, same ol' faces here year after year, someone 'new' would have to seriously turn on the 'zinger' for me to consider unhiding... and making a 'welcome to the pond' comment/introduction....

meanwhile, I'm retreating even further away from OLD and giving up home internet in a month... moving house & downsizing to a cottage, buying a single bed and becoming crazy chicken lady and gardening... been slack this year in the running dept and going to get meself into some half marathons in next decade.... nope, not fazed about 'romance'...
 TheEvolutionOfJessi
Joined: 8/29/2015
Msg: 44 (view)
 
Put some clothes on!
Posted: 11/20/2016 7:19:37 PM

It was actually a bra she'd bought from a specialist underwear and sleepwear shop we have here called Bras 'n' Things. I would never have known.


Nancy... I know about Bras&Things 'down here'... (I'm south of you across the bight in Taswegia ;-) )
they've got some good stuff... but not practical for my lifestyle...

mind you... I have been able to get some nice stuff from Best & Less... (their prices help me have more $$$ for entering fun runs)

and it seems the menfolks appreciates the finer details too...
 TheEvolutionOfJessi
Joined: 8/29/2015
Msg: 39 (view)
 
Put some clothes on!
Posted: 11/20/2016 2:56:45 AM
(since POF won't let me edit at the moment...)

and if rockabilly is not your style, there is always "panache"
http://www.panache-lingerie.com/resources/product-colour/front/2015/12/22/14-24-38/main/panache_swim_portofino_moulded_balconnet_bikini_sw0952_classic_pant_sw0956_navy_white_f_t1147.jpg

now it's a 'fine line' isn't it???
 TheEvolutionOfJessi
Joined: 8/29/2015
Msg: 38 (view)
 
Put some clothes on!
Posted: 11/20/2016 2:49:40 AM

I walked 4 metres up my driveway in a full cupped bra. I was on my own property. I kinda don't get what I did all of 20 seconds is an issue.......


and you rocked it like a Queen.... (sorry Nancy, just channelling my inner queeniness after an overdose of Constance Hall)
I've done the same when I've been between sessions of run training, gymming or some other queen business...
some 'under' garments are now actually marketed for 'outer' wear....

and who's to say you weren't actually rocking a swimsuit top, with the lovely retro/rockabilly styles out there... (not all of them are halterneck )
https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/564x/42/f2/83/42f2831f33f4be196f219473686d516f.jpg

more of it darl'n... more of it... (I have a neighbor like that... has made my life hell for last 4 years... and it's one thing I won't miss when I move across the river next month)
 Theevolutionofjessi
Joined: 8/29/2015
Msg: 47 (view)
 
Who is the moron who puts the random pics of women up on top of the message page?
Posted: 11/20/2016 2:17:51 AM
grrrr misogynistic
 Theevolutionofjessi
Joined: 8/29/2015
Msg: 46 (view)
 
Who is the moron who puts the random pics of women up on top of the message page?
Posted: 11/20/2016 2:14:38 AM

unless you can dunk a basketball or play a guitar, I am going to have to support you for the rest of my life. boy, do I resent that."


lucky for you Seki, master potion is in my country, not yours... meaning it's me who is paying for the rest of my life.... yes, I recognise the mysogynistic Brisbane Bogan... me thinks someone has spent too much time watching fantasy porn and angry that 'real' women don't want his d!ck anywhere near them....
 TheEvolutionOfJessi
Joined: 8/29/2015
Msg: 62 (view)
 
Friendships Where Your Friends Use You
Posted: 10/29/2016 4:50:23 AM
"not my kid, not my problem'.... Yeup... I see the 'problem'....

New moms are recovering from the birth of their 'kid'.... if they manage to make it out of the house, they want a 'break'... and some support...
time to face it... your friendship dynamics have altered... she is focussing her time and energy on her baby, and needs to be with people who will support, energise and recharge her - yanno, maybe even change a diaper or two...

(on an aside... if the 'kid' is now around the year old mark, s/he's starting cruising, and touching/pulling things and maybe, just maybe 'mom' doesn't want her kid breaking anything of yours... you would feel resentful of the kid touching all your stuff and messing up all your cleaning... I know I avoided taking my kid to anybody's house because I didn't want him breaking their stuff... I'd rather they came to my place and let my kid be in his 'familiar' environment... and if something broke in my house... I was prepared for it... )
 TheEvolutionOfJessi
Joined: 8/29/2015
Msg: 159 (view)
 
Let's Talk But Yet They Don't Want but Want You Too?
Posted: 10/26/2016 12:09:59 AM
Nataly broke the forums.... can't get to page 7 of this thread...


ETA: (unless I post that is.... dern.... lol)
 TheEvolutionOfJessi
Joined: 8/29/2015
Msg: 140 (view)
 
Let's Talk But Yet They Don't Want but Want You Too?
Posted: 10/21/2016 4:36:45 PM
:: shaking my head ::
NAtaly.... I was going to stay out of this one, as I'm certain you're going to listen to my diatribe either... however I'll make the effort anyway...
you keep complaining that "all" (and that's a generalisation isn't it??) men keep asking you the transgender/male/d!ck questions... I read this with dismay, however it also set off a 'curious' question in me...

so I thought to myself.. hmm, I know... let me Google "handsome women".... yanno, some of them are doing really really well... apparently Angelina Jolie hits the list, along with Bones" actress Emily Deschanel.... along with a supermodel whose name I have forgot... also is a strong facial featured gal by name of Coco??? (I researched further, it's Coco Austin? but I also recognise that her 'now' self is also a lot of surgery too.)
I even went on further and well, a lass in your realm of music and rock (but I'm not sure if it's your genre) Florence Welch.... (who even admits that her style initially was really clumsy) But just from going by some of Florence's pictures... many critics could make the 'assumption' that she's transgender....

so yanno, none of these classy ladies sat around in their youth saying "I'm ugly, everybody thinks I'm a guy"and not doing anything for themselves... they got out off their arses and worked damned hard and I'm sure, part of that process was to learn from stylists about what worked for their own 'masculine' features.... (their success did not come from 'being married'...) but I'm absolutely certain they never got 'negative' feedback either- I'm sure there were times they had to swim out of it...

You have had kindly people here repeatedly giving you some awesome suggestions... but to me,your "don't wanna" attitude towards them really stinks... and 'that' ain't gonna get you far... definitely ain't going to get you married [to someone I feel your parents would approve of].

On an aside... it appears you have certainly taken on some coaching for your profile... that's definitely a tick toward some success...
( go on grammar Nazi's... have a laugh at my writing skills... I do all the time!!)
 TheEvolutionOfJessi
Joined: 8/29/2015
Msg: 29 (view)
 
Would you take them back?
Posted: 10/15/2016 3:20:41 PM
dang.. a 'decade' old thread... however on topic (after having sighted my last ex [still single] in our paths crossing)

"a re-lit cigarette never tastes the same"...
 TheEvolutionOfJessi
Joined: 8/29/2015
Msg: 861 (view)
 
The Facetious Bluez
Posted: 10/6/2016 5:37:10 PM

^^^ I don't see her as lazy; I see her as afraid to stretch herself. I don't think she's testing boundaries. Her personal boundaries are already fixed and inflexible. She wants people to fit around her. All her posts indicate that she wants her behaviour validated rather than questioned. Life isn't like that.


Well put Mr Tiger.... I agree...


and speaking of disabilities and getting out there... let's not forget Australia's own Steve Payne....

http://www.smh.com.au/sport/horseracing/melbourne-cup-2015-family-affair-in-great-race-for-the-paynes-and-prince-of-penzance-20151031-gknunt.html

I admire the tenaciousness of those willing to get in and do the stuff that other's say they can't...
 TheEvolutionOfJessi
Joined: 8/29/2015
Msg: 832 (view)
 
The Big Bad World Bluez
Posted: 10/4/2016 4:17:05 PM
Oh please Mr Butters, please tell me you're being facetious, right????

Nataly, don't blame us for the topic change (yet again) YOU asked the question...

I'm a single mother - effectively an only lonely as I have no surviving immediate family; already lost a daughter at birth (she would be your age if she had survived), and now have an only lonely tweenage boy... we've cheated death twice. (labor & car crash) I tell him - two guarantees of life, taxes and death. One of us is going before the other... we don't know how or when we're going out... but at least try to give the 'survivor' a body to dispose of. Funeral costs are in the bank....

After that, the survivor will manage... somehow... or die trying.

Do I worry?? you bet your sweet behind I do.... but I'm not going to have my son sitting at home learning helplessness... as I've said before, he gets two chances to move away from home, then he's on his own... and learning - that sometimes 'bad things happen to good people' and "you have to work hard to get what you want from life".

eta: I didn't learn to drive until I was 20, paid for all my own lessons, took extra lessons when my instructor told me I was ready to take the test... had my major crash 18 years later, after driving in two other countries (opposite side of the world) and come back to Australia
only just recently had my first breathalyzer test.... passed....
I expect the same for my son.... (well, except for the crash that is.... but life happens)

 TheEvolutionOfJessi
Joined: 8/29/2015
Msg: 801 (view)
 
The Birthday Bluez
Posted: 10/3/2016 1:39:23 PM
Nataly.... I don't believe for a second that anybody here is trying to change you.... nobody can.... but perhaps if you viewed their words as 'seeds of wisdom'... One smart guy even said - stop reading, you're only creating your own pain....

Personally, I don't believe you will... you relish reading... and trying to have the last word.... you never will on 'this' forum site.

Ironically, your posting here has given me the chance to develop a distant crush on one of the very intelligent High Value male posters here.... and if I didn't have 12yo baggage, I would actually consider cashing in on my 'british by descent' ticket and move to the UK....


Why do I have to accept your view point. I was brought up right and I am going to believe in with I believe in and do what I want. My life will turn out and work out right so back off.

When you've had a couple of months of birthdays, please, do come back and let us know how that life panned out, won't you??
(oh, man, I"m gonna go to forum hell for that suggestion... lol)
 TheEvolutionOfJessi
Joined: 8/29/2015
Msg: 779 (view)
 
The Birthday Bluez
Posted: 10/1/2016 6:16:36 PM
Oh MsHalo, aren't you investing just a weeeee little bit too much in this?? lol (just kidding, I've got "grey wet Sunday blues" and plenty of time on my hands too... )

I believe, that my first comment in this 'whine' posed the plausibility that Natalie's parents had tried to get her out on her own.... but she wasn't going..... your research seems to support this suggestion...
I will reiterate that belief.... and err on the side of what Natalie believes to be bullying, is actually in fact her parents applying parenting....

I tell my own son, while my mother said she'd never evict us out of home, she did give us "two return to home" chances before we were on our own.... and I'll apply that same chance to him.... before I move into a one bed RV and travel my island.... (and he can have the one bedroom house for rates and maintenance if he does not have kids.... lol)
 TheEvolutionOfJessi
Joined: 8/29/2015
Msg: 22 (view)
 
How well do you know your neighbors?
Posted: 10/1/2016 3:09:23 PM
I've been in this part of Australia for 15 years now.... it's like the Tasmanians can 'smell' the 'mainlander' on me...

Been in my current rental going on 7 years now... and have had all sorts of neighbours ...four 2bedroom units home the single elderlies to one side (I keep an eye on them when their aides are not there) and the other side is a rental that has gone through a 'quiet-kept-to-herself single gal', followed by two 'fledgling gals' testing growing up... and now I've got a recently moved in bloke (whose missus just left) and I'm privy to buttcrack views while he's working on wrecks in the front yard....
Across the street is little family of 30something mum & dad with son of 2 and little baby girl - they keep to themselves and we watch them play out the front...

We pretty much 'light' chitchat out in front yards, might 'borrow' a tool or two with store 'gift' card when the item is returned and then get on with our lives...
I can count on one hand, the 'friends' I've had over for coffee and gossip....

Our house is getting run down and not about to be upgraded anytime soon, so I'm contemplating moving closer to my son's school....

We won't be missed....
 TheEvolutionOfJessi
Joined: 8/29/2015
Msg: 754 (view)
 
The Shocking Newz
Posted: 9/30/2016 5:00:23 PM
friggen heck = double post glitch!!!!
 TheEvolutionOfJessi
Joined: 8/29/2015
Msg: 753 (view)
 
The Shocking Newz
Posted: 9/30/2016 5:00:06 PM
If nothing else, this discus... err I mean 'reading report' certainly gave me some new research to look at - I'm spending a LOT of time googling and covering "idiot compassion"....
I can't really elaborate, but it does keep me busy during son's spring break....
 TheEvolutionOfJessi
Joined: 8/29/2015
Msg: 1 (view)
 
Da Benz's
Posted: 9/28/2016 9:10:46 PM
A businessman in the first class cabin decided to chat up the drop-dead, gorgeous flight attendant.

Businessman: "“What's your name?””

Flight Attendant: "“Angela Benz, sir”.”

Businessman: “ "Lovely name. Any relation to Mercedes-Benz?””

Flight Attendant: "“Yes sir, very close”.”

Businessman: “ "How close?””

Flight Attendant: “ "Same price."

ooooch, I'm gonna burn for dat one....
 TheEvolutionOfJessi
Joined: 8/29/2015
Msg: 5 (view)
 
One Foggy Halloween.....
Posted: 9/28/2016 9:08:41 PM
:: g r o a n ::

(consider it stolen, swiped and plagiarised to share with friends who won't hate me for sharing lame jokes)
 TheEvolutionOfJessi
Joined: 8/29/2015
Msg: 705 (view)
 
Suicide Is Painless
Posted: 9/28/2016 4:28:19 PM
^^^^

because as a defiant little girl, Nataaly HAS to have the last word..... ;-)

(and we all know how that works, right???)
 TheEvolutionOfJessi
Joined: 8/29/2015
Msg: 654 (view)
 
The Birthday Bluez
Posted: 9/21/2016 11:29:15 PM
I've been following too.... as it gives me faith that I'm not doing too bad with my master 11 "Son, I ain't gonna blow smoke up yer ass and tell you it's sunshine... life is tough, and when you finally identify a problem, you have to ask yerself - how much am I willing to pay to have this problem resolved???"


No one in these posts have mentioned to Nat that marriage does not always mean forever. Thank goodness I had a great paying job during my years as a single mom. Even If I did not have kids I would still need that good job to support myself.
Nat, what is your fall back if that marriage fails? Sorry, honey, marriage is a not a guarantee.


Bingo... I've been wondering this - a marriage between a man with assets and a woman with 'nothing'(as Nataly has already identified) is going to more than likely [hey, extrapolating on hearsay, not evidence] have a pre-nup.... Marriages without kids are easier for folks to walk away from.... there's less to think about splitting up and 'providing' for.... I know it did for me...

Also, if you're determined not to have kids (making it easier for him to walk away from a marriage) what have you undertaken yourself to ensure this does NOT happen?? Surgical tubes tied?? IUD?? or are you also trusting and expecting him to solve that problem too??? I know that even 'best' contraception can fail if it's not implemented correctly.


Oh dear me; we have pushed some buttons, haven't we? Nataly, you're coming across as a stroppy pre teen, contradicting herself all over the place.

ditto... I was wondering when the 'temper tantrum' was going to show.... you're not getting what you want in an extremely antisocial way....... guess what, neither do millions of others around in the world get what they want... but they accept it, and find an alternative solution and move on, understanding the wisdom in the long time quote, "that sometimes, not getting what you want is a 'good' thing"
 TheEvolutionOfJessi
Joined: 8/29/2015
Msg: 295 (view)
 
The Birthday Bluez
Posted: 9/7/2016 9:19:25 PM
Aaaaah, from the land down under... I've been following this since the start... and was almost going to advise as others have, to go out and date yourself on your birthday (I make it my annual goal to do something I've never done before - ie getting lost in Bremerton was hilarious)... however, the longer I left posting, I lost the start point to begin my 'advice'... so now (with this thread) I just sit back and wait for the afternoon installments... (mind you, I've started sneaking in some morning (before work) catchups too)

However, I'm actually going to play devil's advocate and think that nataly's parents have actually tried to get her out... however she won't budge (and of course, she's going to play the victim [and from that perspective blame her parents for holding her back in development] rather than admit I might be correct) ... and wants a fellow to take over and 'provide' for her... I have an 11yo who suffers from the "I don't wannas"... (diagnosed Aspergers but I don't let him play that card) and you can be sure as heck he has so solve his own problems, and has been told time and time again, ain't nobody going to bail your ass outta trouble so stop asking for advice if you're going to ignore it!!!

hmmmm, as per the intervention, notch me up for the coffee side of the fence... I can't do alcohol.... ;-)

please... do continue...
 TheEvolutionOfJessi
Joined: 8/29/2015
Msg: 3 (view)
 
YOUR PoF SOP #1 Still have your line in the water?
Posted: 6/3/2016 12:34:25 AM
If I were an updated member.... (not worth the cost) I'd change my user name to "completely jaded"....
I won't ever use a smartphone, or a tablet app for POF... use the desktop for POF through search engine... in/out

in this region, it's the "same ol', same ol'"
Same photos and profiles for the last 4-6 years..
I've made opening contacts with some, rejected by many ... and met about five of "decents" for either coffee, movie and at longest, a 5 month life change.

Nup, line is in the water but no bait... it's all just for S&G's.... I have a profile mainly for "once in a while" post on forums....
 TheEvolutionOfJessi
Joined: 8/29/2015
Msg: 67 (view)
 
Found dead, eaten by cats
Posted: 2/22/2016 1:15:53 AM
After a very brutal winter down here in Tas (and I was extremely unwell) and a not so great summer (pretty sure we've broken records)
I've had my first looks at my own mortality and considered this dilemma of what should happen to me.. especially considering I'm homeschooling my only Asperger's diagnosed son [no father] with no other support... and prospectively buying a new 'home' for us in the next 12 months... so setting up security at '[nearly] fifty.. yes, I toss and turn a LOT... thinking I had better get things in order (and I've begged my son not to have children... he can have a low cost house to live in by himself, but as soon as he has kids, my house goes to Earth Regeneration Charity and he has to buy his own place for them... yeah, I'm a mean mother... )

Fortunately, all medicals at the doctor tend to check me in as 'so bloody healthy you're wasting my time, get out of my office'... considering my mother's long health, and my health now, I'll probably hit 85 years old... (father died in his late 60's of diabetes, smoking and laziness.. I have none of those)

BUT if I'm going to go by some freak accident, and be eaten by my 'pets', it's going to be 'tripped up by my freeranging hens at their suppertime', crashing my head on some pile of something I have out there in the yard... then after they've taken all the fallen supper grains, they'll start on my body... yeup, pecked to bits... there won't be much body to leave to science...
 TheEvolutionOfJessi
Joined: 8/29/2015
Msg: 58 (view)
 
Women's idea of a good date
Posted: 1/9/2016 3:07:11 PM

I guess it boils down to proposing a non-traditional (i.e. food and beverage) date would require actually reading a profile (and for the other to have written a profile with something worth reading) and then having the guts to propose something non-traditional. From reading the forums it appears people would rather kvetch about the cost of dates and who pays for the dates than to find an alternative.


One of the reasons I have listed my 'range' of date suggestions on my 'first date' box... these don't cost a LOT of money, are fun for a short while - are definitely more interesting than sitting picking at food (Said as a food-a-holic who has had eating issues in the past and would like to avoid mainstream 'food' dates)
and as there are so many, they do at least give some indication of 'dating long term' rather than just one hit wonders...
Yeup, by their own admission - very few fellows read down that far...
 TheEvolutionOfJessi
Joined: 8/29/2015
Msg: 952 (view)
 
RANT
Posted: 1/9/2016 3:26:04 AM
Agreed MrRider... I think we as a human form, were meant to connect in real life.
I'm almost ready to disconnect from technology completely... (save for education research/lesson plans, banking and bill paying that I can do through the library service)

After following some life coaching - I've been putting myself into 'real life' situations with meeting people. Not saying I'm out there to 'meet the one'... but like you, just to get some real dialogue going...

I'm too busy house hunting for a year to bother about dating...

good luck with the 'flirting'...
 TheEvolutionOfJessi
Joined: 8/29/2015
Msg: 12 (view)
 
Nothing in comon = boring!
Posted: 12/24/2015 1:30:20 PM
By my child's 9yo logic, 'opposites' should work:

This came up in casual conversation two years ago....
"mom, if opposites attract, then you need to look for an ugly, bad mannered terrible cook of a man.... "

Well, at least the kid could/can give a compliment in a 'beat the bush' kinda way...

I do tend to agree, that opposites are not necessarily best when seeking a long term relationship.
Therefore, I seek someone with similar values and ethics to my own... and can have a conversation... that's what we're going to be doing in our eighties..
 TheEvolutionOfJessi
Joined: 8/29/2015
Msg: 23 (view)
 
Brilliant Disguise
Posted: 12/22/2015 11:00:13 PM
After my last situationship dissolved, I went through a major phase of questioning my judgement... it has been a LONG six month journey of therapy and developing a new perception of who I was/am and trying to figure out how I fell so heavily for a great 'disguise'... (therapy will be ongoing for easily another six months - however I'm getting better in my judgment calls.)

This is one reason now, that I feel now, that my life 'master plan' actually doesn't involve being with a partner... but being here on the Earth for another reason. Just trying to figure out what it is... I'm never going to be 'perfect' but I can only do the best I can.
 TheEvolutionOfJessi
Joined: 8/29/2015
Msg: 3 (view)
 
who pays
Posted: 12/22/2015 1:59:03 PM
When?? I like to think that right in the beginning - but if she hasn't mentioned anything by dates 3 - 5... then [I feel] that's a pretty good time to consider how much you're willing to invest in her and to bring it up.
Me being me, I would have been insisting on 'dutch' from first date... however that's just me...

When I did go out on two dates with a gentleman who insisted on paying for both, despite my strongest objections at the second date... I knew he wasn't listening to me or respecting my opinion and I knew we weren't going to be a match (there were other reasons on his part too, but the fiscal issues were one of mine)
 TheEvolutionOfJessi
Joined: 8/29/2015
Msg: 17 (view)
 
Should I still talk to this girl even though she lied to me about having cancer?
Posted: 12/22/2015 1:16:52 PM
^^^
yeah, funny that.. I actually know what my quite mature for age son is capable of reading, and also that we're able to discuss critical thinking... along with morals and values in people...
So why not use this topic as posted here for the learning opportunity?? (yes,that's a RHETORICAL question, no need to answer)
especially since I'm selective about what I share with him.... but yanno, that's just me raising 'my' child - something more parents could do to engage with their kids, instead of the children going out at 13 and 14 to hang with peers that will get them pregnant, on drugs or into juvenile centres... (yeah, so I'm generalising for 'this' part of the world...

Sheesh, it's not like I actually show and let him read the 'sexuality' forum and discussions....

meanwhile, with two days to the commercial day... I wonder if OP did end up getting this gal anything, or not?? We invested with our thoughts, but now I wonder... if he took any of the advice offered..
 TheEvolutionOfJessi
Joined: 8/29/2015
Msg: 43 (view)
 
The Kindness of Strangers
Posted: 12/20/2015 2:53:05 PM
Thanx "strangers" for the stories that my 11yo can read and show him, that while not every 'good deed' is met with kindness, one can still try to let kindness drive in all interactions.... (it's hard to be his mom, father, teacher, life coach and peer in one hit)

happy holidays :)
 TheEvolutionOfJessi
Joined: 8/29/2015
Msg: 8 (view)
 
The Kindness of Strangers
Posted: 12/17/2015 7:57:06 PM
I'm in one of those 'it has been a battle' days... so this thread is timely...
I'm struggling to find a 'good' stranger memory in all my 50 years... as my memories are all so conflicted...

I guess that two that come to mind:

When I was on my travels in USA, one was the 'bear claw' cook who drove me back to base in Tacoma. This was after I had had a falling out with an acquaintance who had taken me to a folk festival and then changed her/our [post festival return] plans when she decided she to cavort over Washington while I wanted to go back home. (more details but not necessary here)

The other was when I was travelling back across country here in Aus, and I was on the Adelaide to Melbourne 'driving' leg (after two nights on the train) and had to find the Melbourne port to catch the ferry to Tasmania... and I was continually getting lost in hot January Melbourne with less time to get onto the ferry.. panicking about driving there and also missing my son (who I hadn't seen in days - our first time separated at night) and a random taxi driver helped me out - letting me follow him to the port to arrive just in time so that I was third last onto the ferry...

Oh, and I guess adding on to that is number three is my kindly landlord who was himself, poverty poor at one stage, and has built himself up to millionaire status... who lets me stay here [not for free mind you] until he's ready to develop; letting me play 'farm girl' with my egg layers, sheep dog and practicing building stuff and gardening... without any quarterly rental inspections of the house that are 'normally' associated with renting here in Australia... he has treated me well.
 TheEvolutionOfJessi
Joined: 8/29/2015
Msg: 868 (view)
 
RANT
Posted: 12/17/2015 12:47:06 AM
Grrraaaaaaaagh....

why is it when hiding things from kids, you hide them so well you forget where you balley well hid them??
yeup, last week it was his monthly 'kid-zone' magazine (which I finally found slipped between two boxes of stored away wine glasses) while this week it's the freaking TV remote control (we last had it on Saturday)
 TheEvolutionOfJessi
Joined: 8/29/2015
Msg: 811 (view)
 
RANT
Posted: 12/15/2015 2:49:42 PM

Castle messaged me.

She was invited by a tribal chief of the aboriginal Darkinjung tribe to observe the bora (Burbung) initiation ceremony.

Something to do with young men.

She's off the grid for a week or so in the Outback.


Not buying it, calling shenanigans. Looks like a deletion to me, not a 'hiding'.

Just when I thought it was safe to come out and play since the sheriff returned :)


But, but, but..... she messaged me to see if I could hook her up with some hunky sailors from the Yacht Club during the Sydney to Hobart race festivities at end of December.... all I could find for her was the crusty old Commodores...

I've been out in the yard readying the roses for them to present to her - and I'm the one stuck with the pr!cks... errr I mean thorns in my middle finger.....
 TheEvolutionOfJessi
Joined: 8/29/2015
Msg: 135 (view)
 
Does anyone care if the profile looks that hot?
Posted: 12/14/2015 5:42:12 PM
Same issues Diana...
After watching both you and Spot here, I laughed and unhid my profile opening myself up to statewide prospects... 0 messages... (thanx but after last brutal bashing over at profile review, I'm happy with what I have in profile, I won't visit over there)

As I close up living down here in Hobart during 2016, it appears I'm going to have a very dry year of "online" dating, and then relocation to 'reduced audience' with spare time taken with study/teaching/living will make the following 3 years even dryer.... so adding up all those years - this time around, I predict that I'm going to beat my 9 year celibacy drought...

Location has a LOT to do with it...
 TheEvolutionOfJessi
Joined: 8/29/2015
Msg: 4 (view)
 
Should I still talk to this girl even though she lied to me about having cancer?
Posted: 12/14/2015 5:26:38 PM
OP - while the dollar's down, could you send me some too??

Even my nearly 11yo sees through her scam... and he has 'learning difficulties'...
He said - "wait until you see her medical results.... ;-) "
This is exactly why I'm warning him about people who 'ask' for your money...
I'm teaching him, "neither a lender nor a borrower be" and when you do have to do deals, get it in writing... seems a 'handshake' is not enough these days. ( Maybe I'm jaded... )

Of course you don't give her money... nor a gift... and you buy yourself running shoes to run in the opposite direction with nary a whisper in her direction...
 TheEvolutionOfJessi
Joined: 8/29/2015
Msg: 110 (view)
 
Does anyone care if the profile looks that hot?
Posted: 12/13/2015 5:24:09 PM
Goodlaordy, you ladies are cracking me up.... thank you for making a hard morning slightly more bearable.... (yes, even 'teachers' and home edding ones at that) are allowed to laugh....

I'm simply envious that those profiles got way more of a message than 'Hi' ... sheeshlouise...

I'll be back later after new driver's licence photo taken today (I can't believe it's been five years already since the last one, and even my son laughs at it - so I hope today's turns out 'hot')... and conversations with the chickens....
 TheEvolutionOfJessi
Joined: 8/29/2015
Msg: 790 (view)
 
RANT
Posted: 12/13/2015 12:10:56 AM
bwahahahaaaaaa.... the 'new moon' bringeth [the guy last week]

and a text taketh away.... lol

OH well, as my neighbor says - if you sit at the bus stop long enough, there'll be another bus shortly.... lol
oh hell, I'm still relocating up north, as I have discovered a new Associate's Degree (only being offered up there, not at the campus down here) that will help me in my future with new employment opportunities arising in Tasmania....
my 'bed partners' are going to be laptop & text books again.... LOL
 TheEvolutionOfJessi
Joined: 8/29/2015
Msg: 35 (view)
 
Merry Christmas
Posted: 12/12/2015 3:06:31 PM

The winter solstice is a time of transition from going inward to going outward; from assessing the meaning of my life's experiences to acting upon that meaning. The POF forums in general, and some posters in particular, have played a meaningful part in my life. For that I am grateful and sincerely wish you peace of the season.


CynthiaSM - I like this, the forums have been influential in my learning and evolution this year

One reason I like Janus Day celebrations so much.... beans & pork meals for us.... (having summer down here)

and then 2016 will be my year of application of investing in 'me' after what I've learned in 2015...

PS folks, this year, December 25 is a Full Moon? be careful out there.....
 TheEvolutionOfJessi
Joined: 8/29/2015
Msg: 57 (view)
 
LONG DISTANCE CONTACTS FOR OVER AGE 50
Posted: 12/12/2015 2:56:26 PM
While he's not on one side of the country, he IS within 150 miles of where I am now living, and will be within 20 of where I [potentially] plan to live.... and he's down here at least weekly with his 'baby'... (he is in first 6 months of starting up new business and is down here frequently on distribution of product duties... )
I have to go up that way at least once a month during 2016 to explore the various towns and university/working in the future options, seek rentals and respite/community care needs for my son...

Not knowing any of his details - I made contact with him because we had interests (and it appears values) in common, and I wanted to 'favorite' him so that when "I" was available to date, he might be also....

So as it turns out, we've got all the timing and opportunities to take things slowly [he's also only 6 weeks out of a 4 year relationship so I could even be a rebound friend] over the next year until I relocate...

So while I was not desperate to be in a relationship, and open to the prospect of waiting, it turns out that my decision to contact him - despite the odds of actually connecting seeming futile - have paid off for both of us in this case...

So 'why' do people with a distance between them make contact??
I think simply; because sometimes, some people take an optimistic chance....
 TheEvolutionOfJessi
Joined: 8/29/2015
Msg: 15 (view)
 
Is this a common occurrence?
Posted: 12/12/2015 2:36:27 PM
Very common....
and not something I'll invest in....

I made/make it clear up front, meet quickly... and take it slow... but not so slow it goes comatose....

I actually (try to) limit talking time on , leading to 'more questions', next dates
appears to be working -

however it's early days...
 TheEvolutionOfJessi
Joined: 8/29/2015
Msg: 14 (view)
 
Merry Christmas
Posted: 12/9/2015 10:02:09 PM
Recognising that there are around 38 "HOLY" days celebrated by all and sundry at this time of year, I'm an inclusive of all "Happy HolyDay" caller...

so whatever the name of your HOLYday(s)...

ENJOY.... stay safe, stay sane and stay out of the newspapers!!!!! (unless it's for 'good' and not evil)

My 10week 'season' started three weeks back and also includes masses of festivals of including: Janus, various mortals' birth anniversaries and Australia Day when the solstice branches are undecorated and converted to into 'winter' starters ready for our Tassie chills in March.

No singing from me.... the dog cringes too much at the croaking of my voice...
 TheEvolutionOfJessi
Joined: 8/29/2015
Msg: 713 (view)
 
RANT
Posted: 12/7/2015 10:34:11 PM
Glad someone can laugh with me.... ^^^^^^^^

yeah, and what is it with Life having a sick sense of humor???
I plan to relocate towns... happen to chance upon a possible 'suitable' POF match up there.... shoot off a message for 'catch up down the track, I'm not ready to date now'... and due to his own explainable 'lack of time' constraints, and being a twice weekly visitor down here - it's almost uncannily perfect timing????
Life has a lot of explaining to do....
 TheEvolutionOfJessi
Joined: 8/29/2015
Msg: 711 (view)
 
RANT
Posted: 12/7/2015 10:25:59 PM

Me?
A lifetime of being in the Aussie sun.
Smoked for years before quitting.
Drink booze.
Also work hard and keep my mind active.

I think I would rather die younger and not get dementia.


this was my plan.... party hard til sixty then take myself out to the bush somewhere and quietly off meself....
that WAS until the kidlet came along.... and I quit smoking cold turkey, was celibate for 9 years and now only drink between once a year and up to once a month....
(Life has a sadistic sense of humor.)

I worked in dementia speciality for ten years and wouldn't wish it on my best enemy....
( I WANT those sods to remember why they are my enemy. )
 TheEvolutionOfJessi
Joined: 8/29/2015
Msg: 708 (view)
 
RANT
Posted: 12/7/2015 8:18:50 PM
FREAKING INDICATORS peeps....

indicating to turn ONE way and then actually turning the opposite????
and it was a cab driver to boot???

and it's a rainy day today... after no rain for a while...

I know I'm no gem of a driver.... but come on.....

At least the kidlet got a lesson on 'situational awareness' and having to 'figure out what the other drivers on the road are doing'

On the upswing, Dr supports my decision to relocate to low stress town (yeah, I know I'd NEVER manage in a mainland city now) .... lots of indications that this is a good move....
 TheEvolutionOfJessi
Joined: 8/29/2015
Msg: 20 (view)
 
Anyone open to a military marriage of convenience?
Posted: 12/7/2015 2:31:22 PM
MissTexas...

I'm not sure if you'll post this question in 'single parents' as advised by others... so I'll put my answer here... (while there's still space for an answer)

for the love of life, and the life of your two little ones.... no matter the struggles... BE THERE for them.... it will pay off in the end...

I know this, I'm a home educating mom to one nearly 11yo boy on the Spectrum (who has only known his father via Skyping on a screen for a few months... in 20011) and I've recently been diagnosed on the spectrum myself. Life is not easy... BUT, in the grand master plan of life... somehow, the choices you (and their father) have made in the past, have resulted in your two cherubs who want nothing more than to have you around.... They need to know, that you'll love them unconditionally, and that may mean going without your dreams and desires....

At the moment, I loathe the thought of being on welfare... however, I've had to have a re-evaluation of reference... No longer do I feel like I'm on 'benefits, or welfare'... I refer to my government and the taxpayers, as 'investors'... they are investing in me and my son and I - that I'm being paid to raise a 'productive' member of society... and the taxpayers will be rewarded....

You have to be your children's advocate... and show them the good in the world.... and do not marry some stranger for the benefit of fulfilling your dream....

not much more I can say.... but I do wish you well... I'd be one of the first to make time to offer respite if I were over there.... I know you need it.
 
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