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 Author Thread: Should I give it a go?
 bionic kitten
Joined: 12/18/2008
Msg: 27 (view)
 
Should I give it a go?
Posted: 3/19/2010 11:13:48 PM
Kara - I think you're making the right decision in saying goodbye to Mike. Two things that I would have a problem with:

1) He cries a lot! I don't mind a man with a sensitive side, but not a crybaby.
2) He pronounced his love to you in front on his family and is going to pursue you. Manipulative much?

It will only get worse. What makes us attracted to someone to begin with is usually what turns us off when things go bad.
 Bionic Kitten
Joined: 12/18/2008
Msg: 64 (view)
 
Romantic or Stalkerish
Posted: 3/7/2010 8:31:55 PM
One yellow rose is sweet - shows me you are thoughtful. 3 dozen would make me feel strange - like you were overthinking the date.
 Bionic Kitten
Joined: 12/18/2008
Msg: 3 (view)
 
Worst 2 dates possible...lol
Posted: 3/7/2010 8:14:41 PM
I have a female friend who lives alone, was never married, never had kids and it's been awhile since she's been in a relationship. She will burp or pass gas in public and not even think twice about it. I think she's been alone so long that she doesn't realize what she's doing. However, I believe she does take daily showers. LOL!
 Bionic Kitten
Joined: 12/18/2008
Msg: 37 (view)
 
Was the excuse for being a no-show valid enough?
Posted: 2/27/2010 12:31:58 PM
She sounds very passive to me. She's playing a game that you don't know the rules to by expecting a phone call from you before she physically commits to the date - and that's not fair. I also see a lack of communication on both parts. Texting and emails only go so far - a real live phone call tends to clarify plans.
 Bionic Kitten
Joined: 12/18/2008
Msg: 19 (view)
 
Accumulation versus simplifying - which phase are you in ?
Posted: 2/24/2010 9:55:36 PM
I've been simplifying since my son moved out 7 years ago. I've never been a collector of anything, so that hasn't been an issue for me. I'd rather spend my money on travel and experiences than the next new car or stainless steel appliances. Sure they look nice, but they don't matter all that much to me.

But I am a creature of comfort, so I'll always have a comfy rocking chair and big comfy couch.
 Bionic Kitten
Joined: 12/18/2008
Msg: 15 (view)
 
A little presumptuous -- or is it me
Posted: 2/21/2010 9:13:33 PM

A little presumptuous -- or is it me

Both. I would never walk into someone's home and pull out a vase, unless I was very familiar with them and their house and knew where to find an appropriate vase.

And if someone was thoughtful enough to bring me flowers, I wouldn't care what vase they were placed in. I've been through the experience of losing valuable items in a house fire - they're things that may or not be replaced. A person cannot be replaced. And a moment of kindness should be cherished.
 bionic kitten
Joined: 12/18/2008
Msg: 18 (view)
 
My friend wanted me to meet her male friend
Posted: 2/21/2010 2:06:06 PM

....he would rather meet me with his group of friends as hes shy..


Since your friend said he's shy, I think it would be more comfortable for both of you to meet in a group setting, unless you feel like carrying the conversation. What if he doesn't talk? He might be more talkative if he's around his friends and then you can see what he's really like.
 Bionic Kitten
Joined: 12/18/2008
Msg: 23 (view)
 
Walk out on a date?
Posted: 2/16/2010 9:11:28 PM
Almost! The guy I agreed to meet for drinks seemed very intelligent, thoughtful and sweet in emails. But apparently his pictures were a little old and he wasn't an athlete anymore and he neglected to tell me, so I didn't recognize him in the parking lot. He was waiting in his truck for me, and as soon as he saw me get out of my car he hopped out with a big smile on his face, so there was no way I was getting out of that one! LOL! I felt trapped at that point, but decided I had to go through with it. It was pretty awful for me, but he was having the time of his life. At the end of the meet, he said "this is always the awkward part of the date because I don't know what to do." I shook his hand and told him to email me. He never did - so he must have figured the attraction was not mutual.
 Bionic Kitten
Joined: 12/18/2008
Msg: 493 (view)
 
Is sex as important to you as it once was?
Posted: 2/12/2010 11:40:41 PM

If you happened to find yourself alone on a deserted island with a male, you would form a sexual relationship with him regardless of his particular qualities.


Nope. Not me. If I'm not attracted to a man, there's absolutely no way I'd have a sexual relationship with him. The majority of my female friends feel the same way. Sex is important, but I would go without it than have it with someone I'm not attracted to.
 Bionic Kitten
Joined: 12/18/2008
Msg: 100 (view)
 
What will your kids find?
Posted: 2/12/2010 11:18:49 PM
Why is it that sons put their mothers on pedestals while daughters are more apt to understand about those special "toys" we possess?

My married son is a snoop so he probably knows about more than he'd ever confess to seeing. My daughter-in-law told me that every time they come home to visit (they live in FL), my son checks my phone to see who's been calling me. LOL! If he knew my password, I'm sure he'd check my emails, too.

I've got a stash of toys that would surprise anybody cleaning out my house, but I really don't care. So I had a healthy appetite! They'll probably be jealous!
 Bionic Kitten
Joined: 12/18/2008
Msg: 51 (view)
 
Long fingernails
Posted: 1/30/2010 5:33:40 PM
I keep my nails even with the tips of my fingers. They can still scratch an itch . Any longer and it drives me nuts to type. My mom taught us girls to give ourselves manicures/pedicures, so I've always done my own nails. My nails tend to split more in the winter because of the dry cold weather and grow like crazy in the summer. I like to polish them nude or pale pink when I go out, but not so much for everyday work.
 Bionic Kitten
Joined: 12/18/2008
Msg: 38 (view)
 
Breaking it off to shag or not to shag?
Posted: 1/19/2010 10:28:40 PM
I say follow the Golden Rule: Do unto others as you would have them do unto you.
 Bionic Kitten
Joined: 12/18/2008
Msg: 13 (view)
 
tell me what you think
Posted: 1/2/2010 8:12:58 PM

scurvy little spider: this is where the posting history can come in really handy = what i think

No lie.
 Bionic Kitten
Joined: 12/18/2008
Msg: 18 (view)
 
Have you ever or Do you still keep a list or record of who you have slept with??..
Posted: 1/1/2010 8:57:00 PM

I just review the videos that I took with my hidden camera and uploaded to youtube.
 Bionic Kitten
Joined: 12/18/2008
Msg: 26 (view)
 
Excuse or truth?
Posted: 12/24/2009 12:35:59 AM
So good to hear you had a good date! I've learned that you have to give someone the benefit of the doubt. If they say they're sick, and you have no proof otherwise, then believe they're sick. Otherwise you will fall into the game-playing, doubting their every word. And that is not a good way to start a relationship. Good luck!!
 Bionic Kitten
Joined: 12/18/2008
Msg: 2 (view)
 
Death of a SON
Posted: 12/15/2009 10:25:13 PM
I'm so sorry that you have had to go through this. It never seems fair when a parent has to bury their child. The best suggestion I have is to find a support group for parents/family of suicide victims. I'm not sure anyone here has the professional skills necessary to help you. Again, I'm truly sorry.
 Bionic Kitten
Joined: 12/18/2008
Msg: 227 (view)
 
Bodily Imperfections......what can you/can't you deal with?
Posted: 11/28/2009 4:56:07 PM

I am also coming to terms that I will have to work out for the rest of my life.


We all will, maleta. You're not alone!

As for northersingleguy - you're right, he doesn't have a clue. Once again, this forum leaves me speechless.
 Bionic Kitten
Joined: 12/18/2008
Msg: 102 (view)
 
I don't care that he did, but WHY DID HE HAVE TO LIE?
Posted: 11/14/2009 3:00:03 PM

sometimes, we unfairly assume the worst about people.

Yes, we do. I hate to say it but I've become somewhat jaded when it comes to online dating. I used to believe everything I was told unless it was proven to be wrong. Drove my friends crazy, but I sure enjoyed dating more. Life was simpler then.

OP - I just have to ask. Is your girlfriend actually going on a date with him??
 Bionic Kitten
Joined: 12/18/2008
Msg: 490 (view)
 
Very long hair on a woman is very femine and sexy, but few women have long hair
Posted: 11/11/2009 7:42:26 PM

^^^^^when you get too old and too lazy to have long hair you're too old to be attractive to men so you may as well learn to live without us and date your B.O.B.

no wonder we like 25 year olds!!!!


Ouch. Other than that, I'm speechless.
 Bionic Kitten
Joined: 12/18/2008
Msg: 17 (view)
 
Sex...Hurts?
Posted: 11/6/2009 7:09:25 PM
You might not be stimulated enough. It happens to me every once in awhile if I'm not ready and my vagina hasn't expanded enough to allow the full penis inside, and the penis will hit the cervix. If that's the case, take more time in foreplay, or change positions until you're warmed up. I can't handle more than a couple of thrusts before I have to yell out in pain, and if you're allowing it to happen while you're biting a pillow, I'm not surprised you're cramping the next day. It's more apt to happen with someone new for me.
 Bionic Kitten
Joined: 12/18/2008
Msg: 57 (view)
 
What if the woman makes more money than the man.
Posted: 11/4/2009 9:47:41 PM
I'm sure a lot of men feel emasculated when they're with a woman who makes more money than they do, especially in my generation (I'm 53). I don't really care how much a man makes as long as he's a productive member of society and enjoys what he's doing.

I have a lot of girlfriends who make a lot more than their husbands or boyfriends, and those women have more control in their relationships but the men seem to be fine with that. I have another friend whose husband is a sometimes-employed university professor, and he enjoys having a wife with a steady income so he can work when he feels like it. She wants him to be employed full-time and holds resentment towards him. It totally depends on the individual personalities. Me? I'm very easy going with lot of things - and this wouldn't be an issue for me.
 Bionic Kitten
Joined: 12/18/2008
Msg: 14 (view)
 
Dating In The Dark
Posted: 11/4/2009 3:48:58 PM
I've known many people who would be termed "average" looking in most people's eyes, but after getting to know their personalities, they become "above average" looking and are definitely preferable to a 9 or a 10. That's what's difficult with the weeding process of online dating - we might be crossing someone off, and they might a real gem in personality in real life. Sometimes it shows in profiles, but sometimes not. Maybe those dating videos from the '80s were on to something.
 Bionic Kitten
Joined: 12/18/2008
Msg: 16 (view)
 
How long b4 date
Posted: 11/2/2009 5:46:19 PM
I think that was sweet. And if she reads this, even sweeter!
 Bionic Kitten
Joined: 12/18/2008
Msg: 117 (view)
 
sugar mommy?
Posted: 11/1/2009 9:41:03 PM
I was contacted by a young man from Italy who wanted to be my sugar baby (my term). He was a successful architect living in FL. As tempting as it was, I just couldn't see myself introducing him to my family.
 Bionic Kitten
Joined: 12/18/2008
Msg: 40 (view)
 
Never kissed a girl
Posted: 10/27/2009 7:30:58 PM
I think I was playing spin the bottle the first time I got kissed by a boy. It was fun. LOL! Don't take it too seriously, and don't worry about what the girl is thinking. We like getting kissed. Follow her lead - cuz we like to lead in gentle kissing. And sometimes we like rougher kissing, too. But start with the gentle ones.
 Bionic Kitten
Joined: 12/18/2008
Msg: 10 (view)
 
Insecurity issues
Posted: 10/24/2009 1:58:58 PM
First of all, congratulations on losing all that weight! That's a major accomplishment and not easy at all. Heck, maintaining takes a lot of work!

Secondly, not all men want a hard bodied woman. My philosophy is that I am a woman and I have some soft spots - they remind the man I'm with of my femininity. I do take good care of myself, but I never intend on making myself muscle-bound. I prefer to be healthy and enjoy life. And enjoy men!
 Bionic Kitten
Joined: 12/18/2008
Msg: 38 (view)
 
Lip gloss
Posted: 10/18/2009 7:52:15 PM
I like to wear a very light coat of clear lipgloss to keep my lips from getting dry. My lips are usually rosy colored without lipstick, so I don't see a need for lipstick. I like to protect my lips and lipgloss feels better than chapstick.
 Bionic Kitten
Joined: 12/18/2008
Msg: 48 (view)
 
Cell phones and the first date
Posted: 10/9/2009 5:24:42 PM

I'm going to leave mine at home next time I go out. I kind of like the idea of being able to feel like I'm not wearing pants even when I have them on. I'll make sure it's a warm enough day and I'm not expecting an important call.


Good one!
 Bionic Kitten
Joined: 12/18/2008
Msg: 333 (view)
 
Sleeping naked
Posted: 10/8/2009 7:35:10 PM
Nekkid feels best.
 Bionic Kitten
Joined: 12/18/2008
Msg: 109 (view)
 
Who Does All The Work In Bed?
Posted: 10/8/2009 7:28:18 PM
Most men are much stronger than women (thanks to testosterone), and are able to sustain some positions longer, so it's easier for men to "work" harder. Like many others here, I wouldn't consider it work, and have never compared who put more into it. It's all about mutual pleasure.
 Bionic Kitten
Joined: 12/18/2008
Msg: 72 (view)
 
Sex Toys... (....for men!)
Posted: 10/8/2009 7:09:48 PM

If a woman has trouble with orgasm, doctors will advise her to masturbate and get familiar with her own body


Exactly! And "Use it or Lose it!" Nothing wrong with toys for men or women. Using them together just adds a little spice to the mix.
 Bionic Kitten
Joined: 12/18/2008
Msg: 303 (view)
 
WHY R OLDER GUYS SO SEXY????????
Posted: 10/8/2009 6:38:39 PM
If they've taken care of themselves, it's confidence and experience. If they have a young attitude, even better!
 Bionic Kitten
Joined: 12/18/2008
Msg: 51 (view)
 
I get too nervous to go on dates so I always cancel
Posted: 8/7/2009 10:15:02 PM
OP - I think you need to "practice" dating more. Just like anything you're not comfortable with, it will get easier with time. I recently went on a date with an attorney and about half way into the date, he told me I was his guinea pig - he had been married for 30 yrs and had only been out with 2 other women in his life. He was extremely nervous, which surprised me, given his occupation. I wished him good luck and we parted ways. No harm done - he got in some practice dating and I helped him build a little courage for his next date. It was all good.
 bionic kitten
Joined: 12/18/2008
Msg: 46 (view)
 
Ladies, Is Walking You to Your Door Important?
Posted: 8/3/2009 5:45:12 PM

Needing to find a distancing workaround would seem to foretell a a pattern for as long as the relationship lasts of: "Well, if you don't know, I'm not going to tell you. . . ." Which is, in the end, death to communication. I think I'd consider myself well out of this one.


Exactly. If I do something wrong, I want to know about it right away or I run the risk of doing it again!
 bionic kitten
Joined: 12/18/2008
Msg: 23 (view)
 
STRESS. Got some?
Posted: 8/3/2009 11:21:14 AM
Yes, of course I have stress. Some stress is healthy - keeps us on our toes. I'm having surgery next week and will be homebound for a month, with limited mobility for another couple of months. I questioned my sanity for continuing to date, but it's a good test to see who can handle it. LOL! I know that you men feel you have to "fix" everything. I'm not looking for anybody to fix me, I just want companionship while I'm in recovery. And maybe some meals brought in.
 bionic kitten
Joined: 12/18/2008
Msg: 24 (view)
 
Ladies, Is Walking You to Your Door Important?
Posted: 8/3/2009 10:58:40 AM
I like getting walked to my door, especially at night because you can't see my front door from my driveway. When I drive myself home, I drive right into my attached garage so I don't have much of a safety concern. Your date could have asked you to walk her to her door if it was that important to her. I wouldn't hesitate to ask myself.
 Bionic Kitten
Joined: 12/18/2008
Msg: 37 (view)
 
necessary losses, hidden treasures....
Posted: 8/1/2009 9:06:38 PM
Serenity - I'm sorry for the loss of your pup. Your post has brought up all kinds of emotions in me - some good and some sad. I've had to make the difficult decisions to put down a dog and a cat in my lifetime. I stayed with both of them through their last breath. I didn't think I'd be able to stay with them, but I found it incredibly peaceful, like I was trusting God to take care of them from that moment on. I opted for both of them to be cremated with a group of other pets - sort of like them all going to the "other side" together. I've had peaceful dreams about both of them - I dreamt my dog was running through the fields, as happy as could be, and I dreamt my cat was sleeping next to me on my bed. I always believed it was their way of telling me they are living on eternally, in spirit. My vet made a little clay paw print of my cat on her last day and I have it on my dresser and look at it every morning - it makes me smile.
 Bionic Kitten
Joined: 12/18/2008
Msg: 45 (view)
 
Roses or chocolates?
Posted: 8/1/2009 6:57:02 PM
If I had to pick, it would be roses - love 'em! However, a few truffles are nice, too.
 Bionic Kitten
Joined: 12/18/2008
Msg: 618 (view)
 
Why do women date mutiple guys at once?
Posted: 7/21/2009 7:25:53 PM
Well, honestly, you gotta strike while the iron's hot, and if you've got a few guys interested you have to make the most of it. It seems to be either feast or famine with dating and you have to take advantage of the situations. I don't really like dating more than one person at a time, like I'm forced to do right now , but it's better than sitting at home alone on a Saturday night.
 Bionic Kitten
Joined: 12/18/2008
Msg: 23 (view)
 
After a first date, is it okay to email rather than call?
Posted: 7/20/2009 8:39:07 PM
I prefer a phone call. It's more personal.
 bionic kitten
Joined: 12/18/2008
Msg: 34 (view)
 
Room mates 45 and over, Does it effect dating?
Posted: 7/13/2009 11:22:18 AM
5 roommates is kind of a lot. It sounds like growing up with my 4 siblings plus parents - I couldn't wait to move out! I could probably date someone in that situation, but as far as long-term, probably not my cup of tea. I need my privacy.
 bionic kitten
Joined: 12/18/2008
Msg: 18 (view)
 
Online dating vs Social groups
Posted: 7/13/2009 10:51:43 AM
The Meetup group that I joined is 90% women/10% men, so odds are better for men. But I would agree that it is the best way to meet a "real" person that you can actually see and talk to.
 Bionic Kitten
Joined: 12/18/2008
Msg: 48 (view)
 
Dating a Married Man
Posted: 7/11/2009 6:20:26 PM
I would walk away and not look back. I don't think it's any of your business to tell his wife what's going on, and chances are she already knows, especially if he's on dating sites. I have a friend that went through this with her ex-husband. She could clearly see on the family computer that he was setting up dates with other women, so she gave him him enough rope and he eventually hung himself (not literally!).
 Bionic Kitten
Joined: 12/18/2008
Msg: 1261 (view)
 
Cheating- can you forgive?
Posted: 7/11/2009 6:01:10 PM
Yes, I have forgiven, but not likely to forget. You're only hurting yourself if you don't forgive because it will eat away at you and you will become (or stay) a very bitter person. And who wants to hang out with that?
 Bionic Kitten
Joined: 12/18/2008
Msg: 24 (view)
 
What are the odds...really?? REALLY????
Posted: 7/9/2009 6:08:19 PM

Its almost too easy to meet people and such that you find yourself holding out for better the longer you are a part of this evilness.



Is that what's going on? That might explain some of what I've been seeing.
 Bionic Kitten
Joined: 12/18/2008
Msg: 284 (view)
 
He brought his Fanny with him...
Posted: 7/8/2009 10:29:11 PM
Nothing wrong with a fanny pack - guys don't always have pockets deep enough to carry all their belongings. I have no problem with them. There are other things that are more important dealbeakers for me.
 Bionic Kitten
Joined: 12/18/2008
Msg: 63 (view)
 
When are you most happiest?
Posted: 7/7/2009 7:40:10 PM
These things make me happy:
1 - long, luxurious bubble baths
2 - kitties in my lap while getting lost in a good book
3 - balancing the checkbook at work
4 - slow walks on the beach
5 - watching the sun set with a glass of wine

Of course, all of these (except maybe #3) make me happiest with a special guy by my side.
 Bionic Kitten
Joined: 12/18/2008
Msg: 74 (view)
 
Easier or harder to experience heartbreak as we get older
Posted: 7/4/2009 4:56:08 PM
For me it's the same as when I was younger. I'm a hopeless romantic and I tend to wear my heart on my sleeve and it hasn't gotten any easier. I'm a sap that way.
 Bionic Kitten
Joined: 12/18/2008
Msg: 15 (view)
 
healthy snacks
Posted: 7/1/2009 7:55:00 PM
I'm enjoying an oatmeal banana shake right now: I put 2/3 cup oatmeal in a Magic Bullet blender w/ 1/2 tsp cinnamon and blend until the oatmeal is almost flour-like. Add 1 frozen banana (cut in slices), 1 cup milk and 1/2 tsp vanilla and blend until frothy. Yum!
 Bionic Kitten
Joined: 12/18/2008
Msg: 75 (view)
 
Beating the heat at our age
Posted: 7/1/2009 7:21:49 PM
No more short-shorts for me! I wear walking shorts and skirts in the summer to stay cool. I stay out of the sun in the heat of the day - don't need anything to encourage more hot flashes!
 
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