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 Author Thread: Cluttered House
 ElleShooTiger
Joined: 2/4/2009
Msg: 50 (view)
 
Cluttered House
Posted: 7/17/2011 10:46:22 PM
I keep my place clean enough that I can make it very clean and presentable in about 15-30 minutes max. Of course, I dont have a lot of stuff, so all I have to do is dishes, pick up a few clothes, and make the bed. I do come from a cleaning-intensive country, all about making good impressions on your visitors.

I went out with a girl that joked that my place was nazi-clean, then I went to her house and it put mine to shame, lmao. I loved it though, true love right there haha!
 ElleShooTiger
Joined: 2/4/2009
Msg: 36 (view)
 
Messaging those who viewed you......
Posted: 7/17/2011 10:35:12 PM
Do you go up and talk to every girl/guy in a bar that looks at you?

Nope, didnt think so.

And at least at a bar you see a full body shot. Lots of girls will have a Glamour Shots-quality face-only pic, then you click on the profile and look at the 7th picture and throw up a little. And then she messages you that you looked at her profile, ummm. And we're not even talking about kids, divorces, drug use, religion and other disqualifiers.

I was on here about 1.8 days before I found the setting that keeps you hidden. You get the wrong type of attention when you first get on here and click on a few hundred faces lol.
 elleshootiger
Joined: 2/4/2009
Msg: 90 (view)
 
The Billy Crystal Question...Can men and women be just friends?
Posted: 3/10/2010 11:19:12 AM
I have a very beautiful neighbor who is a good friend. When I met her, the ink was not yet dry on the divorce papers, plus some health problems and really low alcohol tolerance, so I "friended" her quickly. Not long after, she got a disease....so yeah.....I have no interest in sex with her. We've both dated other people and they have had jealousy issues, but beyond sometimes hanging out and going grocery shopping, neither of us would go for more. Sometimes having somebody around to talk to and give/take advice is much more important than sex.
 elleshootiger
Joined: 2/4/2009
Msg: 7 (view)
 
Do You Like Your Women/Men Like You Like Your Coffee?
Posted: 3/9/2010 10:57:34 PM
Black and very sweet.......ummm no lol
 elleshootiger
Joined: 2/4/2009
Msg: 15 (view)
 
ex-girlfriend contacted me but now games are being played?
Posted: 3/9/2010 10:43:14 PM
You know what they say, you'll only find what you want when you stop looking. Sometimes lying back and doing absolutely nothing will lead to the right person finding you.
 elleshootiger
Joined: 2/4/2009
Msg: 79 (view)
 
After A Month She Tells Me She's Pregnant - With Another Man's Child
Posted: 3/9/2010 10:41:28 PM
Not your baby....not your problem. Run away!

I really, really, really doubt anybody would call you names for leaving a girl who was pregnant with another man's child and didnt tell you ahead of time.
 elleshootiger
Joined: 2/4/2009
Msg: 9 (view)
 
ex girlfriend contacted me but now games are being played?
Posted: 3/9/2010 9:23:48 PM
She just wanted to see if she still had you by your brain, and it partially worked, but its all a game. Been there, forgave that, it wound up hurting me even more later. If she left you for a guy, then came back, she will leave you again. Just ignore them, it'll make you feel better and hopefully frustrate the crap out of her.

Next time she calls, just tell her you have a great gf and everything is going AMAZINGLY! It a little white lie that tends to make them frustrated because they no longer have power over you and you could care less. I once did that, she didnt contact me for 4 months which was great, but I deleted her numbers and dont answer numbers I dont know anyway.
 elleshootiger
Joined: 2/4/2009
Msg: 12 (view)
 
How to find out penis size
Posted: 3/9/2010 7:04:11 PM

There is only one way for her to find out if this guy is super-duper tiny, and that's to see that penis in its erectile glory -- with her own two eyes.


Make sure to tell her to get him really hot and bothered first, the penis is usually much less amazing when its hibernating.

Cue Seinfeld "Shrinkage" episode....
 elleshootiger
Joined: 2/4/2009
Msg: 8 (view)
 
How to find out penis size
Posted: 3/9/2010 6:51:43 PM
So, if she doesnt fool around (or never has) how would she know how much she "needs"? haha she may be severely disappointed and may miss out on somebody great, just going on something her mom or friend once said.

There is also a big difference between "fooling around" with your clothes on, and "test driving" which is sticking the key in and going for a spin around the block. She can make out with him and rub his leg, and a little higher, she'll get a good idea.
 elleshootiger
Joined: 2/4/2009
Msg: 19 (view)
 
Girlfriend with intimacy issue
Posted: 3/7/2010 1:47:06 AM
When you met her, you met a different person entirely. She has a lot going on, and being young I'd recommend moving on and finding somebody with fewer issues. I've been there before, tried to be a good guy and stand by them and wound up getting burned. I can deal with some physical problems, but when they are mixed (and eclipsed by) emotional problems, its time to protect yourself and move on.

You CANNOT bring back the original feelings and attraction, no matter how much you want to. Trying to will only torture and hurt you in the end. Even if she were to start drinking again and being all happy, you'd still remember the times she was cold and distant and not trust her again. You're not "giving up" on her, you're just recognizing that it wont work like you'd want it to and discontinuing the relationship. Sometimes you just need to step away from the poker table......no matter how hot a hand you "think" you have.
 elleshootiger
Joined: 2/4/2009
Msg: 51 (view)
 
Just broke up because the sex was bad
Posted: 3/7/2010 1:02:37 AM
Hmm, you didnt trust him, you didnt love him, those are like huuuge mood killers. IIRC you used to post about waiting for marriage, so I take it he may have been your first ever? I'm guessing you might also have issues letting go and enjoying sex, and being cold in bed can definitely kill his "mood". If it knows it wont go anywhere, might as well shut off the blood flow and take the night off.

I dont think its shallow to break up over horrible sex, by that I mean if you do it for a while and there's just no improvement, period. It takes a while to get used to each other, dont expect any fireworks the first few times. True love and trust might make sex feel more special, but there is no substitute for practice. With all the other issues, you should have ended it a long time ago anyway, so dont try to focus on just one issue.
 elleshootiger
Joined: 2/4/2009
Msg: 17 (view)
 
Question for the car mechanics of pof
Posted: 11/10/2009 10:56:26 PM
I'm not sure what your manual looks like, but I doubt it shows you the individual connectors and wires like the real GM Service Manual. The numbers on the wire where it connects to the PCM on the diagram should indicate which connector and pin it goes to, but according to my manual there are 3 connectors on your PCM, haha.

I do have the GM Service Manual, if you still havent figured it out send me your email and I can send you the cruise diagram and connector pin-outs, you'll be done in 5 minutes afterwards, lol.

I try to get the official service manuals for every car in the driveway, it makes solving problems soooooooooo much easier! Haynes is decent help, but complete crap when its a more complex problem.
 elleshootiger
Joined: 2/4/2009
Msg: 34 (view)
 
Wouldn't ordinarily do this... Maxim mag/porn accusations etc
Posted: 10/27/2009 9:39:08 PM
WTF? Maxim doesnt even have that many skimpy pictures, it sucks!
 elleshootiger
Joined: 2/4/2009
Msg: 27 (view)
 
Holding off on having sex with a women??
Posted: 10/22/2009 5:23:30 PM
He did the finger smell test..........and you didnt exactly pass, lmao


But seriously, as much as we men might love sex, some of us also have some self control and wont just go at it just because there is a naked girl in our bed. Did you give him any hints? You say "(knowing he could now)", but naked girl does not equal permission. Just say you want him inside of you, that usually sends the message loud and clearly, haha.
 elleshootiger
Joined: 2/4/2009
Msg: 259 (view)
 
Males disapproving of women having male friends
Posted: 10/10/2009 10:17:40 PM

What business has a woman adding so many friends to her facebook friends list when she is already attached? I'll not respond to the idiot who told me to remove myself from the gene pool. If you're with someone you have no business adding complete strangers to your facebook account, end of story.


Are they really "strangers" or people she actually has met in real life from work/school/etc?? Hahahaha you think that by adding people as "friends" to a worthless website she is somehow demeaning your relationship? Facebook could go away tomorrow and most of us wouldnt even remember a lot of the people we had friended over the years. The "friend" concept on there is faaaarrrr from what real friends are, but friend sounded better than "acquaintance" which is what 95% of them are.

You are a loser, and stop stalking her friend list trying to figure out if she is cheating on you with every new added friend. If she has any common sense, she will get tired of your BS and drop you on your ass, and then you will come back here and ask why! There's your answer, stop being so insecure.
 elleshootiger
Joined: 2/4/2009
Msg: 254 (view)
 
Males disapproving of women having male friends
Posted: 10/10/2009 1:12:50 AM
Interesting thread, but is it acceptable for your partner to have over fifty male friends on her FACEBOOK account? I don't think that's acceptable or normal in a relationship. Of course she will have lifelong friends that is normal.


Bwahahaha since when does facebook "friends" signify anything? She can have as many friends on there, for the most part most facebook friends are people we randomly meet or went to school or work with, but RARELY talk to. I have nearly 1k on there but doubt I've talked to more than 100 since I left college, and no way in hell would I delete any of them if a girl started asking questions about who this and that girl are!

If you're going to be the douche that checks her facebook and asks her about every guy, just please go ahead and drop out of the gene pool. My best friend is a female, and she dated somebody who obsessed over her facebook friends until she deleted them, effin loser!!!!

Americans are too damn stuck on SEX! People in other countries are smart enough to realize its not just about sex, but also companionship and being real friends. I have good female friends, yes I might have slept with some of them in the past, but in the end the sex gets pushed to the back burner and you can have fun and be there for one another. Its not just about getting some and running away!

We all in our minds think about having sex with a friend, but only the strong are able to rationalize the fact that a friend is almost always better in the long run. I have a very attractive neighbor who goes out with me quite often, I keep an eye on her if she gets drunk, she introduces me to her friends, and if there are unsuitables around, we'll play the bf/gf gig and run them off. We hang out and BS a lot, and I would never want to ruin a good friendship just for a few hours of pleasure. She is very attractive, but there are also a lot of damn good reasons I would not want to date or get involved with her physically.

Overall, it all boils down to TRUST. If you cant handle your woman talking to another guy without going nuts, you need to get over your insecurity and jealousy!


As has been said many times, if he's just your friend, take your clothes off... if he wraps a blanket around you, and tells you to go get dressed, he's gay( oh sorry, your friend)...
If he tries to have sex with you, then you know for sure....


That is such a childish, petty thing to try.

Where's the option for "I've always wondered what a naked statue would look in my living room"? Haha some people think a naked body = sex, they're brains would explode on most european beaches! Get naked all you want, but if the friend benefits vastly outweigh any possible sexual benefits, I'll just sit back and laugh.
 elleshootiger
Joined: 2/4/2009
Msg: 26 (view)
 
How long to keep it in My Pants?
Posted: 10/9/2009 2:46:48 PM
Do you trim the hedges? Some women cant find the tree for the forest otherwise, so that might have possibly scared her off.
 ElleShooTiger
Joined: 2/4/2009
Msg: 48 (view)
 
dating someone who is still looking and you don't feel the need to
Posted: 9/8/2009 2:18:34 PM
Lots of insecure people around here with major trust issues. Slow it down a bit!

Until you have the exclusivity talk and BOTH verbally (or Facebook-ly haha) agree to be exclusive, committed partners, you have no room to stand on. Some of you expect to delete profiles after the first date??? A single date where you meet somebody for the first time is not a marriage ceremony! I'll gladly delete my profile if I met the right person, and I'd wish they do the same also. But relationships take time to develop, and its a dumb idea to close down your options fully after a single date with a person.
 ElleShooTiger
Joined: 2/4/2009
Msg: 23 (view)
 
taking a rain check ?? lol ??
Posted: 9/3/2009 9:30:43 PM
Play the "oh crap, I'm out of condoms" card and hope she doesnt have any with her, you should both get a laugh out of it, and she'll probably go along with the idea of "next time". Or if its that time of the month. Those are about the only ways you'll get out of this without getting on her bad side.

I asked a girl to wait one time, just until the next date/weekend (it was seriously like 6 am at the time, the sun was coming up, and I was tired from work and going out). She didnt talk to me much after that, doh! I learned my lesson after that, you dont turn a woman down! Better to get physical when she asks for it the first time, then slowly back away from sex and let the rest of the relationship develop.
 ElleShooTiger
Joined: 2/4/2009
Msg: 26 (view)
 
Screamers
Posted: 8/26/2009 4:03:13 PM
Only been with one "screamer", thank god I had my own apartment at that time haha! It was an interesting experience, but the over the top yelling heavily killed my concentration. Plus she had very little tact when asking for certain things, so it really just felt like a porn scene, except she didnt want me to videotape it haha.

Heavy moaning and whispering > complete screaming
 ElleShooTiger
Joined: 2/4/2009
Msg: 46 (view)
 
Car brake question
Posted: 7/27/2009 7:55:17 PM
Here is a mechanic's opinion.

If the rotors were not replaced, the pads need to be "bedded" in, in other words they have to grind themselves down to match any grooves in the disc itself, this takes some time. If the pads AND rotors are replaced, they also need to be bedded in, plus add the fact that there is usually some machine oil on the rotors that has to "burn" off first. This can cause a dead pedal the first few times the brakes are used, but quickly wears off.

In order to install new pads, the pistons on the calipers have to be pushed back in, and its quite possible that they pushed them back in at an angle and they seized in place. IIRC Grand Am calipers are aluminum and more prone to this versus steel or cast iron calipers since aluminum is softer. This would not really explain the dead pedal, unless they damaged one of the seals in the process and thus let the fluid bleed out.

Most of the time, you do NOT need to bleed the calipers when replacing pads/rotors, but it should be done every few years since brake fluid does absorb moisture and becomes "softer". The only other time it should be bled is when the calipers or any other components are disconnected from their respective hoses.

And seriously, it happens to the best of mechanics, but sometime you just accidentally PUT THE PAD ON BACKWARDS!! Or the pad has to line up a certain way within the guide pins/supports. It may look correct once its all together, but the pad will NOT touch the rotor! I'm really surprised they didnt notice the dead brakes when they pulled it out of the service bay.

More than likely you got ripped off one way or another, look around your neighborhood for somebody who works on their cars and ask them to take a look next time. Or get a second opinion, dont just take their word for it!

Side note: I've been at a few dealers for parts and service and coughed bvllshit! at some of the things the service writers could come up with. I know they hated me, but it was clear as day how much BS they were spewing, to mostly women no less, just the way it works.
 Elleshootiger
Joined: 2/4/2009
Msg: 19 (view)
 
New engine in car
Posted: 7/19/2009 10:00:25 PM
Here's a semi-mechanics opinion.

If the water did not reach the bottom of the dashboard, then its relatively easy to fix/clean a flooded car as the only things generally located under the dash level are the powertrain, power seats, air bag module, and the main body wiring harness. The dash is the worst area to have to repair, and many of the most important electrical components are located near the dash level. Its made this way so people wont destroy a car because they drove through 10" of water, the carpet may be ruined but the computers and fuse boxes will be fine. You either ran into a very crooked dealer, or you insisted on brand new parts. I think most dealers with a shred of decency or common sense would have given you other options or referred you to another mechanic. This car may have only needed to have its fluids drained and refilled if the engine did not suck in any water.

I'd have to see the entire bill in order to see exactly how many parts had to be replaced, but yes, a new factory crate engine and transmission, along with various external engine parts, plus wiring harnesses, engine computer, fluids, and installation will easily run $10,000 on most any car, $20,000 for most luxury cars haha! If they also cleaned out the interior and checked/replaced other components then that just adds more to the cost. If they replaced the air bag computer that could easily tack on more than $500 to any bill. Do you still have a copy of it?

Once a car is out of warranty, or there is no insurance, its best to take it to a non-dealer shop and have a good used engine and trans installed. A good low mileage used engine will run $500-1,000 and the trans will cost about the same, and give or take $500 or so for installation. Factory engines are almost never worth the price, used engines are very affordable price-wise and will likely outlast the rest of the car.

As for your mileage, if you want to sell it, just say the BODY has 79,000 miles, but the ENGINE and TRANSMISSION have only 2,000 miles (or however much they have now). Since these are very important parts of any car and have been replaced, you may get some extra money. On the other hand, since it was flooded, the value takes a sharp drop.

If I were you, I'd suck it up as a lesson learned, please please get a second opinion next time! As for the car, with as much money as you've spent on it, drive it into the ground! The mechanicals will easily last a looooong time now, just hope the rest of the car holds up. I hate to say it, but with my sources, I could have fixed this car for well under $1,000 for everything, sure they'd be used parts but this isnt a new luxury car either.
 Elleshootiger
Joined: 2/4/2009
Msg: 17 (view)
 
Vin Numbers of cars
Posted: 7/19/2009 9:29:26 PM
Here is a semi-mechanic's opinion, please disregard a lot of the posts here, I've worked on quite a few cars, rebuilt a few, and also worked in a body shop so I have some knowledge of these situations.

First, you should find out if he really bought the car from a dealer, or stole it. Call your local police and have them run the VIN through their database. If its true as he says that it was stolen, recovered, auctioned, bought by a legit dealer and sold to him, I'm highly sure that there shouldnt be any more legal problems with the car. A lot of times people will buy rebuilt vehicles at great prices from dealers, and when it comes time to sell they have to disclose any past issues.

What title does the car have? Is it clean or noted as salvage/theft recovery/etc? You say he has a paper showing a "pin", so it may have been cleared, inspected, and all the paperwork done and you wont have any problems buying/registering it.

When a car is salvaged, stolen or loses its dash VIN plate some other way, and then fixed, it will HAVE to be inspected by your State Police or other state agency, who will then review all the paperwork involved in order to make sure all the paperwork is in order and all claims settled. They may allow the car to be registered without the dash VIN, as the VIN is located on many other areas of the car. Or they will issue a NEW state sponsored VIN using their own code methods. There is almost NO legal way to obtain an identical factory dash VIN plate.

Obviously, you want to be able to use the original VIN, but a state VIN and clear paperwork is just as good, it just shows that there were previous problems. There should be a significant discount with a state VIN or salvaged title.

Take the VIN and call your local police and ask them to run it through their database to make sure that the car is listed as a theft recovery and that it has been recovered. You may want to request a printout for your records in case you are ever stopped.

If the seller has not done all the right paperwork, you can tell him to take care of the paperwork or inspection FIRST, I would hesitate to buy a car, even at a good price, if there is still outstanding paperwork or inspections that have to be done. You WILL have to get your State Police involved in the inspections and paperwork, which can take weeks if not months until everything goes through the system and you get a clear title. It can turn into a real nightmare if you dont know what you're doing!

If you need any more advice, just let me know!
 Elleshootiger
Joined: 2/4/2009
Msg: 40 (view)
 
Does honesty hurt more than just dissapearing?
Posted: 7/14/2009 1:28:24 AM
Been on both sides of the disappearing act, and its hurt both parties deeply each time. I'd rather just sit down and end it cleanly, remaining as friends or not. If you have enough on your chest that you want to disappear, why not just get if off your chest first?

You can always send an honest message to the disappearer, it does help to get closure, even if they wouldnt give it to you.
 Elleshootiger
Joined: 2/4/2009
Msg: 2 (view)
 
Some help from the French, please?
Posted: 7/14/2009 1:02:59 AM
I'm not French, but I am from Europe, and over there a lot of gestures are indeed more casual than sexual. The French do tend to be a lot more casual about sex and such, so either keep an open mind or stay away.
 Elleshootiger
Joined: 2/4/2009
Msg: 210 (view)
 
Why is no head an automatic turn off for guys
Posted: 7/14/2009 12:48:19 AM
Arent you just so cute and cuddly!! You seem stuck in your own world and dont even read what anybody actually says, or you've just been completely hardened by all the men you've met. Seems you work in a truck stop, so if you're meeting all your dates there then yeah I can see that that's all they'd want. Nothing like a little head to take the sting out of shelling out $300 for diesel! "Yeah I need $300 on #7, pack of Marlboro Reds, 2 packs of Chiclets, and a blowjob"
 Elleshootiger
Joined: 2/4/2009
Msg: 208 (view)
 
Why is no head an automatic turn off for guys
Posted: 7/13/2009 11:06:01 PM

The art of diplomacy is telling somebody to go to hell and making him look forward to the journey.


Judy, you should brush up on your diplomacy skills haha. You can say the same thing 100 different ways, and you seem to always find the most offensive way. You could have said you're not interested in it, and left it at that. But by calling it repulsive, you went way overboard. It paints a mental picture that you're the kind that wears latex gloves to bed and has a bottle of hand sanitizer nearby.

You should probably only search for people who think sex is only for procreation, or cultures that frown upon oral sex, but then you wouldnt get yours either!
 Elleshootiger
Joined: 2/4/2009
Msg: 1078 (view)
 
Why Do women dump men who are nice to them.
Posted: 7/9/2009 11:37:28 PM
Women want men in that nostalgic manly-men sense, somebody with drive, ambition, and balls who can support a family. Its all ingrained in our brains. The bad-guy neanderthal put food on the table, the nice guy neanderthal complimented the lady on her new fur skirt. Guess who's genes got passed on to the next generation? lol
 Elleshootiger
Joined: 2/4/2009
Msg: 10 (view)
 
First time sex with new partner
Posted: 7/6/2009 2:05:45 PM
Well, at least you know the basic mechanics of it all, lol. The first time with any new partner can be very awkward, it may take a few times until you know her buttons and can "be all I can be". If you dont last, just laugh about it and say you were nervous, recover, and go again. We're not pornstars who get it right the first time haha.
 Elleshootiger
Joined: 2/4/2009
Msg: 32 (view)
 
Do ANY guys make love rather than F***ing?
Posted: 7/6/2009 12:48:47 PM
Because of my personal beliefs (we are all entitled to our own) I don't do casual sex. I know some females like the rough stuff, but I'm one who is looking for making love - not the rough talk and the occasional slap on the bum. Because of a previous negative situation, being treated like a "f*** ****" is not what I am looking for in a love relationship.


I think some people missed this part, but it seems you're equating "casual sex" to a little spanking and dirty talk? Huh?????

Sex is as animalistic as it gets, and while making love is great, sometimes you just want to rip your clothes off and go at it like wild animals until you cant go any longer, thats what brings out the true passion in a person! Besides, for all the work we do, letting us slap your bum is the least you could do haha. Any good sex will include some love and some lust, some fast and some slow, too much of either one is almost always bad form.

If all you want is somebody to "make love" to you, that just sounds selfish and will probably scare away a lot of guys.
 Elleshootiger
Joined: 2/4/2009
Msg: 34 (view)
 
Why is our ability to cook/clean so important to men?
Posted: 7/3/2009 11:21:11 PM
Cooking and cleaning are also a form of self-respect, if you eat junk and live in filthy environment, what does that say about you as a person?

I doubt men are looking for somebody just to cook and clean, but they add to the qualities of any person/woman. No need for a mother figure, but some of us can cook and keep our places generally clean, so it's natural to expect same in return. I come from a long line of good men cooks, so if I can cook, its nice if the woman can at least help out or cook herself. The cost of eating out and paying somebody else to clean can far outweigh her paycheck, even more if she doesnt work at all. Its best to share responsiblities, but everybody has to work together.

To turn it around, would you date an astronaut that cant wash his own clothes, lives in a pigsty and couldnt figure out how to boil a pot of water? Probably so because you'd look at other qualities (love, looks, charisma, etc), but men are more logical and we'll assign more points to qualities that really matter, especially when it also relates to raising children.
 elleshootiger
Joined: 2/4/2009
Msg: 4 (view)
 
you had a nice date but....
Posted: 4/6/2009 6:06:42 PM

I was just looking for a nice way to say it, I suppose there is no nice way.

Anyway I did send him an email.


There is no nice way to say it, but honesty gets you bonus points, dodging the other person's emails and running away just shows immaturity.
 elleshootiger
Joined: 2/4/2009
Msg: 213 (view)
 
Getting even or holding a grudge... which would you do?
Posted: 4/5/2009 9:23:02 AM
I forgive, but I dont easily forget, and neither do I dwell on the past. I've held grudges before, but its easier to just forgive them and move on, sometimes staying friends, other times not. Its too hurtful to just think about them and what they did over and over. And over time, even some of the worser things do look funny and you can laugh back at them.

I believe in Karma, everything you do will be done to you back at a later time. Revenge can easily backfire even with the best laid out plans, and when Karma bites them in the ass and they see you happy and not caring about them, thats probably the best revenge.

But as the thread title suggests, I'd go for revenge before I'd hold a grudge. Getting somewhat even will still put a smile on your face years before a grudge lets its grip off your brain.
 elleshootiger
Joined: 2/4/2009
Msg: 3 (view)
 
Would you date a [b]women[/b] if [b]she[/b] was unemployed and living with [b]her[/b] parents?
Posted: 4/4/2009 11:47:37 AM
I've dated women who lived at home while they were still in college, but it never worked out. Having your OWN place and your OWN car, generally means you also have a job and can support yourself, so having their OWN job precedes the other two. These girls didnt have steady jobs, and they lived close to college and didnt technically need their own place, but its gets tiresome of asking their parents if they can go out, or lying about where they're going, and them always coming to your place. I value independence, and you have to be able to support yourself instead of relying on a man at all times!

As for the person who talked about how it was 60 years ago, well back then people married, not for love always, but to form a family and raise successful children. You could take a woman with no job who lived at home, and she would do certain things for the family as long as you could support them. Her job was the house, part of your paycheck was her paycheck. Nowadays its easy to find somebody with nothing, and they'll give you nothing in return, and take everything years later.
 elleshootiger
Joined: 2/4/2009
Msg: 5 (view)
 
I'm gonna express some free speech
Posted: 4/3/2009 2:11:04 PM
You work at McDonald's. And if that doesnt work out, you might work at a supermarket?

That probably kills it for just about any female. They generally want somebody that either has a good job, or big job plans in the future, flipping burgers doesnt cut it.
 elleshootiger
Joined: 2/4/2009
Msg: 11 (view)
 
A breakup, a punching bag.
Posted: 4/3/2009 1:33:46 PM
Cut off all contact with her, and if you can, move to a different apartment/house! Dont talk to her, dont let her know where you live, delete her from your life, this is not an ex you can be friends with! Good luck!
 elleshootiger
Joined: 2/4/2009
Msg: 18 (view)
 
Sex on 2nd date - now what, exclusivity?
Posted: 4/2/2009 12:28:30 PM
Are you attracted to her when's she's fully clothed? There's a reason we wear clothes, and 99.99% of us arent exactly perfect when we're naked. If you cant get past the attractiveness, let her go and maybe stay friends, but without the intimacy, that will just make it seem that you're using her. It might not be the best idea to bring up her body when you talk to her, you'll seem that you were either desperate for attention, or just wanted an easy lay.

Of course, sometimes you can have a good friends with some benefits arrangement if both parties can agree to keep their emotions separate and just enjoy each other's company. This means that you can hang out and do things, and NOT just expect to have sex each time!
 elleshootiger
Joined: 2/4/2009
Msg: 71 (view)
 
Why are so many in such a hurry to meet...?
Posted: 4/1/2009 10:03:53 PM
Emails are like the first time you meet somebody: have a few laughs, get to know each other a bit so you're comfortable, then ask for their number and later meet up in person. Why expend your energy on what you think they're like when you can actually find out rather easily? Most it'll cost you is a drink or a dinner.
 elleshootiger
Joined: 2/4/2009
Msg: 8 (view)
 
Writing a letter to the person who broke your heart?
Posted: 4/1/2009 1:06:30 AM
We've known each other for 13 years, met in high school but I was too shy to accept her invitation to homecoming Then she moved away the next year, and years later I found her online. Started talking and hit it off pretty good, saw each other a few times over the last year and talked a lot. We both fell in love with each other almost right off the bat, but due to the distance thing I didnt try to push a relationship, I mean she's finishing school in the next year and was thinking of moving closer to where I live, since her family is around here also. I also had job opportunities where she lived, so it wasnt like either of us was completely tied down. She met my family and they liked her well enough, and while she does have some minor issues (crazy family and kinda short for me lol), she is truly amazing and blew my mind away in oh so many ways.

I was fine with being friends, then she confessed her love for me, sweet, I finally got to say how I felt too lol. While later, do you want to be in a relationship? Yup! Sooooo I thought we were in an adult enough relationship so as not to hide from each other. We did agree that we could talk to other people, and if anything happened to be open about it. Had we stayed "friends" I wouldnt have cared, but dont ask to be in a relationship and think you can ignore your way out of it a few weeks later. Dont keep pressing me about when I'm coming to visit you and profess your love to me one day, then completely ignore me the next day!

I wish I could say we were just long-distance friends, but it turned into way more than that.
 elleshootiger
Joined: 2/4/2009
Msg: 7 (view)
 
Writing a letter to the person who broke your heart?
Posted: 3/31/2009 11:57:34 PM
Do I care that she met somebody new? Nope. Do I care that she cut me off and didnt care to tell me anything, until later when I almost had to drag it out of her? Yes. I've had my heart broken before, but at least it was in person. She, on the other hand, basically told me (on the phone) that she hadnt planned on telling me anything. I'm not sure I would really classify what she did as cheating, but thats probably because I dont "want" to view it as cheating, which it very much was, or at least completely dishonest behavior on her part. Have the courage to break up with somebody before you jump in with somebody else!

BTW the message was completely about how I felt and that I'd appreciate it if she'd have the decency to contact me. I didnt lay into her and make it rude, what would have been the point of going overboard on her when you're trying to possibly salvage a friendship? I wanted to get some closure from her, but instead got it from sending that message, which is probably better than even talking to her. If I would have wanted to tell her to fuck off, I would have just told her to fuck off, capiche?
 elleshootiger
Joined: 2/4/2009
Msg: 2 (view)
 
What does a girl Truelly want in a guy??
Posted: 3/31/2009 11:12:20 PM
Guys get slammed because apparently we only want one thing.
Girls, on the other hand, want this, this, and that. But thats all subject to change on a whim or time of the month. A lot of the time, they dont even know what they want!

The problem is that you have to find a comfortable place between being a "nice" pushover, and being an "***hole". Women are attracted to confidence, its been that way since forever, somebody who will protect them and slaughter meat and put in on the table, and they'll toss some of their other desires out the window for those reasons. Some guys do it to the extreme, but women still rush to them due to their confidence.

The solution is to be a confident gentleman. Hold the door for her, but dont be the doormat. Let her know who's the boss and that you're confident enough as a man that you can stand up to her, if need be. Make her work for you, not the other way around!
 elleshootiger
Joined: 2/4/2009
Msg: 6 (view)
 
Trying to covince her.... why is it so hard?
Posted: 3/31/2009 10:50:04 PM
BTW always remember that somebody's profile is NOT a full A-Z disclosure of who they are from birth until now. Their profile might look great today, and I've wanted to contact a few women who seemed right. But they might add another detail a day later, and you're like, damn, good thing I found out about that before I contacted her!
 elleshootiger
Joined: 2/4/2009
Msg: 4 (view)
 
Writing a letter to the person who broke your heart?
Posted: 3/31/2009 10:31:04 PM
I knew she wouldnt care, but I was hoping she'd at least give me a response one way or another. Guess you never know how closed-minded and cold-hearted somebody really is till the bitter end, and she complained about how her mom is a narcissist and puts everybody down. Well, at least her mom has the courage to tell you how she feels! I didnt bring her mom up in the message though.

My form of final closure would be to delete her entirely from my life, my phone, and our internet friendships, but since there's a likely chance she will one day try to contact me again, I'd like to leave some room open for friendliness, with a lil bit of revenge on my part. Plus deleting her would make me look like I'm pissed, I'm not anymore, thanks to her I can now have fun again, and she can deal with seeing me happy with other girls and just enjoying life.
 elleshootiger
Joined: 2/4/2009
Msg: 4 (view)
 
Trying to covince her.... why is it so hard?
Posted: 3/31/2009 10:00:07 PM
Be yourself, and contact her!!! Just remember that what you see on paper, is NOT what might be there in reality, she might fit a lot of your desires, and also have a vicious laugh or attitude that sends everybody out of the room. Only way to find out is to actually talk to them.

BTW start off slow in your conversations, then "find" things in common, dont make it look like you've analyzed her profile and know all her answers/wants/needs before you even talk, but once you are talking slip them into the conversation slowly. Bring everything up at first, and she'll think of you as a stalker.
 elleshootiger
Joined: 2/4/2009
Msg: 1 (view)
 
Writing a letter to the person who broke your heart?
Posted: 3/31/2009 6:19:54 PM
In all my other breakups, it was almost always amicable and we went our separate ways. There was occasionally some drama later on, but generally I've stayed on good terms with my other ex's. The last one however, she ripped my heart out without saying a word. Met somebody else, started ignoring my calls (we used to talk 1-2 times day, for hours at a time (long-distance relationship)), and the only way I really found out was when she ended our facebook relationship. I sent her a message asking what was up, and she just replied that she met somebody new and was happy. This was also the time we had talked that I would come down and visit her for spring break! She did answer my call that day and it was a rough convo, and I pussied out and didnt say what needed to be said and made it even worse for ME. Needless to say, I was crushed like I had never been before. The next week or so was hell on me. I tried to call her twice and try to get some closure, but nothing.

I wound up typing her a long message on facebook since I didnt have her address with me. Told her exactly how I felt about how she treated me (she also did the whole ignore thing last year due to other issues, a few months later apologized and I gave her another chance). I would have never thought it, but putting my thoughts into words helped a lot, and when I clicked Send, a HUGE burden was lifted off my heart. Fortunately the next day, I was in my old college town and got together with old friends and had a loooong night of partying which gave me plenty of other things to think about!

She never responded, I'm 99% sure she read it. I wouldnt be surprised if in a few months, she drops the new guy for "greener" pastures, again. I've kinda figured that her "friend" a few months ago was likely more than just a friend, and she dumped him for me. All I can say is I hope this catches up with her in the end, and it wont be nice!

My advice to anybody who gets their heart ripped out, if you get a chance to talk to them in person or on the phone, tell them EXACTLY how you feel! Get it out, if they cheated on you, let them know, if you never want to hear from them again, let them know. They might have broken you down, and you might as well break them down also (I know this may be wrong, but why should you be the only one miserable?). If all else fails, apparently putting your thoughts to words helps a lot too!
 elleshootiger
Joined: 2/4/2009
Msg: 5 (view)
 
Women who break your heart over and over and over again.
Posted: 3/31/2009 6:03:05 PM
Some people arent worth holding on to. Tell her how you feel and that you're done with her, dont keep it bottled in! Then move on! She might realize her mistakes one day, and you'll be able to point and laugh at her begging, while holding a much better woman at your side!

There is fate, and its not an easy road, but you'll find the right person one day! Forget her and move on
 elleshootiger
Joined: 2/4/2009
Msg: 24 (view)
 
is this cheating?
Posted: 3/30/2009 7:29:08 PM
Me thinks he should have shared it with you and you could have joined in the fun
 elleshootiger
Joined: 2/4/2009
Msg: 12 (view)
 
Coolest girl turns into strangest.
Posted: 3/30/2009 7:25:10 PM
Girls are weird sometimes and like to play games just to see what you'd do, and how much they can get away with. When they start ignoring you, its usually time to move on. And better for it to be early in the relationship, then months down the road when out of the blue they ignore you and chase greener pastures just for the heck of it.

Grow some balls, and move on buddy
 elleshootiger
Joined: 2/4/2009
Msg: 48 (view)
 
Is this really what the dating scene is like?
Posted: 3/29/2009 10:53:47 PM
As they say nowadays, its not officially an exclusive relationship until its on Facebook! haha
 
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