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 Author Thread: How often does going on more than 3 dates turn into a relationship for you?
 ForRumOnly
Joined: 3/16/2009
Msg: 9 (view)
 
How often does going on more than 3 dates turn into a relationship for you?
Posted: 4/18/2017 11:48:50 AM
If we've gone on three dates, and plan another, the odds are excellent that we'll be dating for a at least a few months to see if there is real potential. Half of those end after a few months, the other half (minus one) ended after about 5 to 10 months - the exception lasted a couple of years, and we got married eventually.
 ForRumOnly
Joined: 3/16/2009
Msg: 30 (view)
 
What is the hardest part of divorce?
Posted: 3/31/2017 9:00:23 AM
The hardest part was the uncertainty in reaching an agreement, and the worry that it would be financially burdensome to me. The decision to divorce was mostly mutual, but I initiated it. Sure, there was some regret at failing, but we'd tried everything to no avail, so there was no other good option left. Finances worked out better than I feared, even though she was greedy and unreasonable - I just had to wait her out.

The rest was pretty easy. Moving out, finding a good place to live, seeing my son regularly, eventually getting back into dating, finding a new relationship, etc.
 ForRumOnly
Joined: 3/16/2009
Msg: 34 (view)
 
Open relationship question.
Posted: 3/24/2017 11:23:02 AM
The strange thing is that it is easier to find someone who will accept you and date you if they think you are cheating, than if you are honestly in an open relationship. The one big problem with this is that they may be cheating, and I'd rather not get involved in that case. Best just to say you are married and leave it at that, unless they ask, or unless you think that telling them the full story will produce a more favorable response - and find out their situation before going forward, to hopefully avoid a cheater.
 ForRumOnly
Joined: 3/16/2009
Msg: 10 (view)
 
Dating in your 50's and 60's.
Posted: 2/14/2017 6:30:39 AM
After about age 40, the ratio of single women to single men increases quite rapidly.

In your 20s, single men outnumber single women by about 118 to 100. The ratio is about even at age 40, and then there are more women than men - at age 55, there are 83 single men per 100 single women, and by 64, there are only 62 single men per 100 single women.

Of course, many of the people at these later ages have removed themselves from the dating pool, preferring to be single and alone. Many others may want to date, but have significant obstacles or flaws that prevent success. Still, men have a greater pool of similar age candidates, so women are competing for that smaller group of men - and the competition can be much more difficult for those men who are actually desirable candidates in every way. Add to that the preference of many of these men to seek younger women (and many actually have success in this if they don't try to go too much younger), and post-50 men generally have very good prospects (on average).

Of course, statistics provide the landscape, but it's individuals who do the dating. Finding a good match is difficult at any age. Looking at who's out there for my age, there are some very good possibilities - but finding some that also see me as desirable limits that group significantly. Many that do find me desirable spark no interest in me.
 ForRumOnly
Joined: 3/16/2009
Msg: 103 (view)
 
Found dead, eaten by cats
Posted: 1/27/2017 6:15:46 AM
A single woman friend has 5 cats. Another has 7. I'm sure their cats will outlive them - by a week or so.
 ForRumOnly
Joined: 3/16/2009
Msg: 34 (view)
 
Two relationships?
Posted: 1/17/2017 9:45:05 AM
I disagree with those who say you can't date two people. For a month or two, you certainly can, but beyond that, you either need to choose one, or inform both that you are not exclusive and are dating others, too. That may drive one or both away, but it is the honest thing to do.

Now, neither may care that you are dating someone else. I never cared if my dates did - and I would do the same. Just disclose that at some point if you can't (or don't want to) decide on one over the other. Maybe you'll have an extended relationship with both - that's possible too, and has worked for me and some of the women I dated. Most people won't even consider this, but there are others who are fine with a polyamorous type relationship.
 ForRumOnly
Joined: 3/16/2009
Msg: 53 (view)
 
What is your longest internet only relationship
Posted: 12/30/2016 6:09:25 AM
About 10 years now - we met on this site, and still correspond. Almost managed to meet when I was in the UK on business 5 years ago.
 ForRumOnly
Joined: 3/16/2009
Msg: 14 (view)
 
Nipple Orgasm - Does it Exist?
Posted: 12/30/2016 6:06:23 AM
A former gf could orgasm pretty easily this way. I haven't met anyone else who does from that alone.
 ForRumOnly
Joined: 3/16/2009
Msg: 25 (view)
 
The 80/20 rules and why relationships suck today.
Posted: 8/8/2016 8:42:46 AM
80/20? I look at it like several other posters have said: accepting each other as you are, working together to overcome problems, along with showing sincere kindness and generosity in words and deeds makes for a good relationship. If you are compatible, these behaviors do not need to be forced.

When it comes to needs, however, 100% is necessary - anything less means there is a deal-breaker issue that brooks no compromise. The rest are wants, and in those there is often room for compromise and negotiation - and sometimes just acceptance of differences. Of course, if too many wants aren't met, you aren't compatible and should move on. I am fortunate (in this relationship) to have almost all of my wants met, too. She's not rich! (But, there is a even a chance that she will be if some current projects work out.)
 ForRumOnly
Joined: 3/16/2009
Msg: 15 (view)
 
How would you handle?
Posted: 12/14/2015 6:12:48 AM
It may simply be that something about your appearance or personality strongly reminds him of her, and her name has become associated with those things over time. It could be a reflex habit, and nothing more - eventually he will get over it, if that's all it is.
 ForRumOnly
Joined: 3/16/2009
Msg: 58 (view)
 
Do men really expect to find the one on a site like POF?
Posted: 10/20/2015 8:55:00 AM
There is always more than "one" out there. And while I did not expect to find my ideal match on PoF - or other sites, actually - I actually did! There were even a couple of very close runner-ups to choose from - but none from PoF. I'd have never met these people in real life.
 ForRumOnly
Joined: 3/16/2009
Msg: 60 (view)
 
Opinions on Car Doors
Posted: 10/16/2015 7:32:02 AM
Is it necessary? No. Some women don't care or actively dislike such gestures - others enjoy them. So, what I do depends on who I'm with - and of course matters of practicality in any particular instance.

Most of the time I'll open the door for my wife when she is getting in the car - and usually get a kiss for my effort. We both enjoy this little ritual. I don't open the door when she exits, unless perhaps when it is a special event and she's dressed up.
 ForRumOnly
Joined: 3/16/2009
Msg: 144 (view)
 
Would you date a woman that is pregnant?
Posted: 10/15/2015 6:34:23 AM
Only if I were the one who'd impregnated her.
 ForRumOnly
Joined: 3/16/2009
Msg: 24 (view)
 
Taking a poll
Posted: 10/15/2015 6:30:07 AM
There are two very distinct views on this, comprising the single-dating group and the multi-dating group. Both are right - for them.

I'm in the multi-dating group, as it is more efficient and effective for finding someone, and when the option exists, it provides for better decisions that are not based on a scarcity (or perhaps even desperation) mindset. I wouldn't have met my wonderful wife if I hadn't, and might have settled for someone else who was good but not great.

That said, I typically would only multi-date/overlap for at most a few dates before deciding on just one to pursue further.
 ForRumOnly
Joined: 3/16/2009
Msg: 18 (view)
 
Does anyone on here have experience with male sexual exercises?
Posted: 9/21/2015 8:24:36 AM
I've had success with the exercises in books like "The Multi-Orgasmic Man" to achieve the ability to have multiple, sequential - non-ejaculatory - orgasms. It can be a lot of fun with the right partner, but it can be a lot of effort to get to the point where you have the control to do so reliably.
 ForRumOnly
Joined: 3/16/2009
Msg: 36 (view)
 
Religious profiles
Posted: 9/14/2015 8:05:15 AM
I appreciate it when people state their priorities and beliefs up front and clearly. It makes it easy to decide whether or not we'd be compatible, so we don't waste time if we're not.
 ForRumOnly
Joined: 3/16/2009
Msg: 20 (view)
 
What if a woman and man didn't fit and can't have sex?
Posted: 9/14/2015 7:51:45 AM
You are sexually incompatible in a way that can't be modified or compromised. Presumably you both want a sexual relationship - unless you're both asexual, this is a reasonable expectation. If you can't have one with a frequency and range of activities that is satisfying for you both, then you should just be friends and keep seeking someone who is a good match, including sexually.
 ForRumOnly
Joined: 3/16/2009
Msg: 68 (view)
 
Would you cuddle if it NEVER lead to sex?
Posted: 9/3/2015 6:41:33 AM
Sure. If we've had sex FIRST, then the cuddling doesn't have to LEAD TO sex - but it sometimes does anyway. Round two, anyone?
 ForRumOnly
Joined: 3/16/2009
Msg: 4 (view)
 
No sharing
Posted: 7/1/2015 5:54:42 AM
FWB is what you agree upon. It can be exclusive or not, as the case may be. If you don't discuss being exclusive (or say no sharing!), then you are free to have sex with others. Since "no sharing" isn't defined, you can - and should if you want - date other people if you want a relationship or a different FWB scenario. If/when you want to have sex with someone else, you should tell your current FWB that you are going to, so they will not expect sex from you by their own "rules."

If you want a relationship with him, you'll have to discuss it and see what he wants. He may just want an exclusive FWB.

My own experience with FWB has not been an exclusive arrangement, but did expect notice if either of us were having sex with someone else, and use of protection unless current test results are provided.
 ForRumOnly
Joined: 3/16/2009
Msg: 24 (view)
 
Mars, Venus, and Uranus
Posted: 6/16/2015 9:32:03 AM
Attraction and basic compatibility can be established in 1 to a few dates. If those exist, sex is next. If there isn't a problem with initial sexual compatibility, I will see how the relationship develops after that. Often, incompatibilities become apparent to one or both of us within a few months, and it ends. Occasionally you have a great match and the relationship grows and lasts. To me, this all seems simple and straightforward. If the woman doesn't want sex after 3 to 6 dates, we're probably not compatible in our views about relationships and the role of sex, and I move on.
 ForRumOnly
Joined: 3/16/2009
Msg: 16 (view)
 
I know MANY here would never again...
Posted: 5/27/2015 5:50:40 AM
With my ex, I stopped wearing my ring a few years in, when things went downhill. It was a symbolic of the state of the relationship. I eventually divorced her.

In this relationship I now wear my ring almost all of the time, and did even before we were officially married. Neither of us care if the other does, though - our commitment doesn't need a ring as a symbol, as the commitment is the real thing.
 ForRumOnly
Joined: 3/16/2009
Msg: 193 (view)
 
Orgasms from penetration alone
Posted: 5/8/2015 12:43:15 PM
^^ Would that be a boyfriend or a girlfriend - or does it matter? That's some good friend, though!
 ForRumOnly
Joined: 3/16/2009
Msg: 52 (view)
 
FMF experiences
Posted: 5/8/2015 6:10:23 AM
I've had several FMF experiences. The most recent happened when my wife set one up with my FWB. Both are straight, so it was all about me - and it was awesome!
 ForRumOnly
Joined: 3/16/2009
Msg: 56 (view)
 
Low or High Expectations?
Posted: 5/6/2015 6:33:22 AM
OP, there are many great people on POF, but the kind of woman you're seeking is unlikely to be on this site, and most who are won't appreciate you. IMO, you usually get what you pay for (but sometimes get lucky anyway). This is the Yugo of dating sites. o k cupid may be the Honda, match.com the Mercedes, and private matchmaking services would be the Maserati's and Rolls Royce.

Basically, you're looking in the wrong place.
 ForRumOnly
Joined: 3/16/2009
Msg: 25 (view)
 
How long did it take you before you were ready to date again?
Posted: 5/6/2015 6:20:26 AM
It depends a lot on the circumstances of the breakup, who left, was the other person surprised, and other things about the relationship prior to that.

I left after 24 years, so it was a little easier on me than my ex. We both knew it was coming for years, and we were both prepared - mostly. I was dating a few weeks later. She started a few months after that, had a bad experience, and then waited a few more years to resume (as far as I know).

I just wanted to experience a loving connection with someone, which had been absent from my marriage for many years. I wasn't going to wait more years to experience that - I didn't want to wait at all! I was motivated to start dating, but smart enough to realize that I had to figure out how to realize when a person was a good match in ways that mattered for a good relationship. But, I had a LOT of fun dating while doing that! I did figure it out, and did learn from past mistakes, and within a year was in a fantastic relationship that has now stood the test of time.
 ForRumOnly
Joined: 3/16/2009
Msg: 27 (view)
 
Sex after monogamy?
Posted: 2/24/2015 7:33:42 AM
Sex after monogamy? It was absolutely great! Who knew it was necessary to divorce to get good sex (albeit not with the ex!)?
 ForRumOnly
Joined: 3/16/2009
Msg: 25 (view)
 
FMF experiences
Posted: 2/23/2015 6:07:25 AM
We've done a variety of FMF and MFM over the years, plus the usual couple swap/swinging scenarios. There have never been any restrictions on how it would work, it's always been tremendously fun and exciting, and there have never been any problems because of it. YMMV, of course. The latest was NYE, when my wife invited my FWB over for the night. That was the best ever ... so far. It was all about me and they both knew exactly what I liked.
 ForRumOnly
Joined: 3/16/2009
Msg: 66 (view)
 
Is Monogamy dead/dying?
Posted: 2/17/2015 8:16:56 AM
Monogamy is far from dead, but it's certainly being questioned as the only workable relationship model. Obviously, monogamy has its flaws, that are becoming all the more obvious now that women actually have choices and personal freedoms they never had before. This is all to the good, IMO.

Some people are naturally quite monogamous, and at the other end of the spectrum (note, it IS a spectrum) there are people who are naturally non-monogamous (perhaps polyamorous, or maybe just promiscuous). The good thing I see is that it's becoming easier to learn about and explore alternatives to monogamy, for those people for whom that model does not work or suit.
 ForRumOnly
Joined: 3/16/2009
Msg: 10 (view)
 
Why do I always fancy men who I don't have a chance with?
Posted: 2/13/2015 10:55:58 AM
Perhaps you are simply afraid of having a real relationship, and so choose men who won't have a relationship with you. That way, you never have to face your fears.
 ForRumOnly
Joined: 3/16/2009
Msg: 199 (view)
 
Does Friends first ever really work?
Posted: 2/13/2015 10:52:15 AM
IMO, it's great if you meet someone in real life, become friends, and later develop an attraction. That's happened throughout history, no doubt.

On a dating site, I would avoid anyone who says they want to be friends first. To me, they're simply sexually repressed and relationship avoidant, and as such may be flawed. If you're sexually repressed yourself, then perhaps such a person will appeal to you.
 ForRumOnly
Joined: 3/16/2009
Msg: 21 (view)
 
YING-YANG
Posted: 2/6/2015 7:12:44 AM
OP, I think your expectations are highly unrealistic.

She should keep her job, especially if it's a good one with benefits and retirement plan. I don't care how good a provider you are, many women want to be self-supporting and gain confidence and self-esteem from being independent. I think this is a good thing. You may never leave her, and I don't know what kind of person you really are, but your traditional views could be a deal-breaker some day and she may want to leave you! Restricting her options by taking away her career, and tying her down with a lot of children isn't doing her any favors, and can easily be seen as controlling and manipulative.

If you'll need a second job, then you won't be around to help raise the children or be a husband. That sounds like a lose-lose proposition. Why so many kids you can't spend time with? Dumping all the child care on her is a sure way to create resentment and problems.

As for four children - at her age, having more than two spaced two years apart could be risky to her and to the children. Age related complications (and your older sperm) increases the risk of birth defects. She may be wary of that possibility and very likely is about the number of kids you want.
 ForRumOnly
Joined: 3/16/2009
Msg: 96 (view)
 
Being friends with the opposite sex.
Posted: 1/28/2015 8:11:34 AM
We both have opposite sex friends, some from before we met, some made since. Some were former love interests, some we had sex with. It's about the boundaries we have and are able to maintain NOW that matters. If a friend tries to cross a boundary, they will no longer be a friend - it's that simple for us.
 ForRumOnly
Joined: 3/16/2009
Msg: 12 (view)
 
Married/Separated and dating
Posted: 1/21/2015 12:50:03 PM
Plenty of women dated me when I was separated, and I appreciate those open-minded women who gave me a chance. I married one of them soon after my divorce was final. I also gave separated women a chance.
 ForRumOnly
Joined: 3/16/2009
Msg: 103 (view)
 
Open Relationships
Posted: 1/16/2015 6:35:25 AM

When I hear the word "polyamory", I think of all partners love eachother (triangle, square, pentagon, etc).
I don't know if it is possible to love eachother equally, maybe somehow.
I think what virtue might be is just the "other guy", but is getting swept up in romance somehow. Whether it is real or in his head, I still say he is just the other guy. If this was polyamory, I think he would be loving the husband just as much as the wife.


This is a common misconception. In poly, it is NOT necessary - or even common - for all the partners to love each other, and rarely is the love equal or the same. A and B are a couple in love and primary with each other. B may have a lover C, who is not a primary. A and C may know each other, but have no other connection - they are paramours. By extension, this applies to any other lovers and connections. Sometimes, though, subgroupings occur where three (or more) may love each other, with or without any sexual contact.

The rules and arrangements are what the partners want and agree to, and may change with time.
 ForRumOnly
Joined: 3/16/2009
Msg: 86 (view)
 
Open Relationships
Posted: 1/15/2015 7:34:11 AM
We've practiced ethical and responsible non-monogamy for 15 years (to varying degrees and at various times, with a mix of open, swinging, and polyamory), and it has worked great for us, probably because we have a great core relationship, great communication, and high consideration for each other's needs and feelings at any point in time.
 ForRumOnly
Joined: 3/16/2009
Msg: 10 (view)
 
Personality Types
Posted: 1/15/2015 7:23:39 AM
I found that personality types played a major role in my dating, at least going by the 16 Myers-Briggs types. 9 out of 10 of my dates (i.e., 90%) were the same personality type (INFJ). They were actually the best match for my personality type, based on both my experiences and the literature on the subject. I tailored my profile to appeal specifically to this personality type, and had great success with it.

When I dated other types (this was more common in the earlier days of my dating experiences), we did not match up as well, and very few were suitable for a second - much less third - date.
 ForRumOnly
Joined: 3/16/2009
Msg: 26 (view)
 
mfm 3some. what did it go wrong?
Posted: 1/12/2015 8:09:08 AM
The idea of a threesome is to experience extremes of pleasure and lust and let go of conventions and inhibitions. Your ex-gf tried to do just that - only she may have been too intoxicated to manage the experience for herself and include you more (or perhaps you withdrew so much she gave up on you), and you opted out because you really were NOT prepared for this kind of experience.

I understand that it may have been too much to handle - first times often are, especially when you don't have a good basis for what to expect - and it was a turn-off rather than a turn-on. Threesomes may just not be a good idea for you - nothing wrong with that, just unfortunate you had to find out the hard way.
 ForRumOnly
Joined: 3/16/2009
Msg: 30 (view)
 
Same Room Sex
Posted: 1/8/2015 6:09:29 AM
To hell with watching. If I'm not participating (or don't want to) I'm outta there! The voyeurism thing doesn't work for me.
 ForRumOnly
Joined: 3/16/2009
Msg: 19 (view)
 
older women have more competition and fewer men to chose from???
Posted: 10/21/2014 6:28:42 AM
From a Wikipedia article:
15–64 years: 1 male(s)/female
65 years and over: 0.75 male(s)/female
(I suspect there's a transitional period from early-50's up, that doesn't show in these broad groupings.)

So yes, there are fewer men at increasing ages. There are fewer eligible men, too, for many reasons (they may be married, or may not be interested in a serious relationship, or may be undesirable for a relationship due to health, attitude, income, etc.).

Women who want a relationship when they are older will be competing for a smaller pool of desirable men near their age, and the men who want a relationship will be looking for the most desirable women in their age group - or younger women. So there will be many older women who want but won't find a relationship.
 ForRumOnly
Joined: 3/16/2009
Msg: 13 (view)
 
FMF experiences
Posted: 9/29/2014 6:43:29 AM
The easiest way to set this up is to join a swinger site. If you are VERY lucky, you may find a "unicorn" - an unattached bisexual female who will play with both members of a couple. The easiest scenario is to find another couple with a bisexual female, where the women have some one-on-one time and the men share or swap the women.
 ForRumOnly
Joined: 3/16/2009
Msg: 41 (view)
 
dating a 10
Posted: 6/27/2014 10:35:11 AM
Either or both of you can be a ten, and still have a deep and fulfilling relationship. Average and ugly people can be shallow - they have no big advantage due to their lack of attractiveness. This idea you present, OP, sounds like it would be said in compensation by someone who isn't that attractive.
 ForRumOnly
Joined: 3/16/2009
Msg: 18 (view)
 
Over 60, what do you men think about marriage?
Posted: 6/19/2014 8:53:18 AM
I'm hoping to get answers from men over 60.

I'm close to 60.

If you’re dating again, what do you think about getting married again?

I already married again. If single again, I would consider it yet again, but would not find it to be necessary.

I know there are lots of things to consider (assets, retirement, kids’s inheritance, health issues, etc.), but do you or have you considered marriage again?

Most of these issues can be handled with appropriate legal documents, whether or not you remarry. If I did, perhaps a prenup, and certainly carefully written wills and probably trusts would be necessary to be sure that children from prior relationships are protected, etc.

How long would you want to date a woman before considering marriage?

To consider it, I'd want to date at least a year, ...

Would you want to live together first, and for how long?

and live together at least a year after that. The reason being that it takes at least two years to truly know someone, and preferably three to know them AND be sure that the relationship is strong beyond the period in which hormonal attraction is skewing perceptions.

And if you’re thinking “I will never marry again”, do you tell your new love this? And do you expect her to ‘stay with you forever’, with no form of legal commitment? Would you want her to legally become part of your family, or only be a FWB until death at which time she is a nobody in your family tree? Would you expect your new love to accept this as “that’s all it will be”?

That's a mutual decision. If you're not in agreement, then move on or decide to accept things as given. Besides, marriage is NOT a guarantee - divorce is always an option. So are prenups and postnups, when needed. In some cases, marriage can become a financial disaster - which is why some people purposely divorce later in life (e.g., a "medicaid divorce").

I realize these are tough questions… I’m just hoping some of you have thought about this possibility, and can share your thoughts on marriage.
 ForRumOnly
Joined: 3/16/2009
Msg: 38 (view)
 
Monogamy and Sustaining Passion
Posted: 2/14/2014 1:09:16 PM
Passion is definitely hard to sustain over a long period. It naturally fades in most relationships after a couple of years. After that, there is often a shift to a different kind of bonding, but that's unreliable. Humans evolved to be bonded and remain together long enough to have a child and have it be at least weaned. Beyond that point, in the original tribal arrangement, there was little need for parents to stay together, and genetic advantages for them to pair off and mate with someone else.

That said, we are 14 years into a relationship, and the passion has remained alive - a little less hot than at first, but far moreso than the typical hormonal passion period that usually lasts about two years.

Interestingly, we don't think monogamy is a necessary relationship model - but if it works for you and you want that, great! We're more poly oriented, but have had long stretches of monogamy even so. For us, the passion has simply stayed alive. We don't do much to keep it that way - it just is. We just feel we want the best for each other, and we both love intimacy, connectedness, and sex - our drives are matched too. Keeping stress down helps, but coping well with stress and other demands is important to avoid short-circuiting passion. We have also been part of the swinger community at times, and have a (technically) open relationship, but usually don't actually have anyone else. Those may help keep things exciting, which may transfer to excitement with each other, but it doesn't seem that way. It could shift our focus to the new source of excitement instead of each other, but for whatever reason, it doesn't work that way for us.
 ForRumOnly
Joined: 3/16/2009
Msg: 52 (view)
 
Girlfriend Stayed the night at her friends house (male)
Posted: 1/31/2014 7:28:52 AM
It could easily be innocent - it depends on the circumstances and the nature of their relationship. At your ages, though, almost everything is drama it seems - you don't necessarily have the experience and perspective to figure things out.

I had a job where I telecommuted 3 days a week (I lived over 100 miles away), and had to be in the office two days. When in the office, I stayed overnight with a female friend. We'd met on a dating site, but never dated as - in one of those odd coincidences - I was already dating her best friend. Her friend and I broke up, I met my new g/f (eventually moved that 100+ miles to be with her), and my OLD-site friend let me stay at her place one night a week so I could go to the office. It was totally platonic, and no one had any issues with this, including my g/f.
 ForRumOnly
Joined: 3/16/2009
Msg: 415 (view)
 
what do Men in their 60s want?
Posted: 1/19/2014 8:02:04 AM

Hey 60 ish guys. The 40 ish women are not interested in you unless you have money. Get real.


That's often true. The 30-ish women, though, have been quite interested, and I don't have that much money. My FWB of 2 years is 27 years younger.
 ForRumOnly
Joined: 3/16/2009
Msg: 179 (view)
 
Middle aged:have your standards gone UP or DOWN???
Posted: 1/19/2014 7:58:30 AM
My standards have gone up. That's because I now know far more things that can be deal-breakers or problems, and that limits the candidate list more than it used to.
 ForRumOnly
Joined: 3/16/2009
Msg: 35 (view)
 
Does marriage change people who have previoulsy lived together for years?
Posted: 1/18/2014 7:28:35 AM
The cohabitation effect is still widely reported as being a negative for future marriage outcome. However, it has been debunked: http://usatoday30.usatoday.com/news/health/2010-03-02-cohabiting02_N.htm
 ForRumOnly
Joined: 3/16/2009
Msg: 28 (view)
 
Sharing sexual experiences with friends?
Posted: 1/18/2014 6:30:18 AM
It depends. If they are FWB, yes - by making them. Otherwise, rarely.
 ForRumOnly
Joined: 3/16/2009
Msg: 11 (view)
 
Does marriage change people who have previoulsy lived together for years?
Posted: 1/17/2014 8:10:23 AM
We lived together for 7 years, and have been married for 6 - we met 14 years ago this month. Nothing changed with marriage (except taxes and health insurance) - we were concerned that marriage might ruin a good thing, but everything was as good as it gets beforehand, and has remained that way since.
 ForRumOnly
Joined: 3/16/2009
Msg: 33 (view)
 
How long will you communicate via email/phone before you lose interest?
Posted: 12/30/2013 4:20:56 PM
Going by how long I've maintained a pen pal relationship without meeting, at least 6 years. But I draw the line at more than 8 years! In a purely dating scenario, 6 months was an actual situation, where we were separated by 8000 miles - we dated for a year after meeting.
 
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