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 Author Thread: How to deal with partner's promiscuous past
 ellena.
Joined: 3/20/2009
Msg: 112 (view)
 
How to deal with partner's promiscuous past
Posted: 5/1/2011 3:16:27 PM
Have you been living in a box?
How is it you have 0 experience, and he has so many?
Is it because he picks naive women that don't know which side is up to relate with?
umm.. j'es wonderin'.
 ellena.
Joined: 3/20/2009
Msg: 20 (view)
 
Tell me... am I the 'option' and not the priority?
Posted: 4/30/2011 7:46:15 AM
You lost me after you wrote ," the bad stuff ".. The bad stuff in my opinion came afer you wrote, "He lied"... be done w/ him.
 ellena.
Joined: 3/20/2009
Msg: 48 (view)
 
I'm in a bad position
Posted: 4/26/2011 8:15:02 PM
When you let someone mistreat your son, maybe you'd better examine your own problems.
Put your foot down to this type of treatment. Kick his arse out if his behavior doesn't change .
 ellena.
Joined: 3/20/2009
Msg: 18 (view)
 
Girlfriend is moving in with me. Any advice?
Posted: 4/25/2011 10:38:18 AM
Moving in w/ someone is a good way to kill a relationship.
 ellena.
Joined: 3/20/2009
Msg: 29 (view)
 
Persistence vs Stalking?
Posted: 4/24/2011 8:07:59 PM
Call once say, I was expecting your call. Are you okay?
If you get another,
" I'm busy , can I call you... I say ,skip it. .
 ellena.
Joined: 3/20/2009
Msg: 88 (view)
 
Relationships with Bartenders and Waitress
Posted: 4/22/2011 6:30:44 PM
I agree w/ gardenias and abelian on this one. The fact that this behavior is bothersome to her is reason enough for him to stop it, imo.
If he loves liqour, and attention from females other than his wife, he shouldn't be married.
Trust is one thing ,being stupidly naive is another.
That behavior isn't conducive to a healthy marital relationship, There is such a thing as emotional cheating too.
 ellena.
Joined: 3/20/2009
Msg: 44 (view)
 
Person A suspects something is up with person B
Posted: 4/19/2011 5:36:23 PM
Well it's not a bad text.
 ellena.
Joined: 3/20/2009
Msg: 22 (view)
 
playing-VS-boredom
Posted: 4/19/2011 5:20:10 PM
Over- generalize much, op?
Maybe you should look inwards to fulfill your requirements.
Be exciting and interesting. Maybe the same type will be attracted to you.
 ellena.
Joined: 3/20/2009
Msg: 11 (view)
 
What are some signs someone is attempting to use you for citizenship?
Posted: 4/19/2011 5:12:02 PM
Well, I'm from the US and I think I can write w/ confidence that he doesn't want you for citizenship.
I could see your concern if he was from a third world country , but US? not so much.
Maybe if you elaborate a little, I can understand your concern.
 ellena.
Joined: 3/20/2009
Msg: 19 (view)
 
dating help - letting a girl u like her and care for her
Posted: 4/13/2011 8:34:42 AM
Sometimes you don't need to be that direct.
The way you treat her, and body language can tell a person a lot.
Maybe you can mention that you enjoy the times you spend together.
Good Wishes. :)
 ellena.
Joined: 3/20/2009
Msg: 15 (view)
 
Making new friends?
Posted: 4/12/2011 10:32:00 PM
meet.com or meet up.com matches people w/ similar interests in the same geographical location.
I've heard some positive reviews about the site.
 ellena.
Joined: 3/20/2009
Msg: 42 (view)
 
Introducing Someone New Into Your Social Circle
Posted: 4/11/2011 9:51:56 PM
It's in bad taste imo to leave someone new in the crowd alone.
I'd hope if that happened they'd find someone more considerate to leave with.
 ellena.
Joined: 3/20/2009
Msg: 2 (view)
 
Ooo! Free help! Review, please!
Posted: 4/11/2011 10:43:52 AM
First the name. Lonely seth.
Sounds kinda pathetic. Need a new name.
Add more photos. Learn how to spell psychology and fix it on your interests. Anime? what's that?
Delete I won't wear pink, no matter.. makes you seem unwilling to to make a girl happy.
Make contacts daily till you get some replies This takes some practice, and you can't expect success immediately.
Happy
 ellena.
Joined: 3/20/2009
Msg: 246 (view)
 
Nobody's Perfect - What's Wrong with YOU?
Posted: 4/11/2011 8:46:06 AM
That's the trouble with being an older dater. We all have baggage. I guess we all have to decide what baggage is acceptable to us.
Like you I tended to believe people at their word. I have learned to be more sceptical lately tho.
 ellena.
Joined: 3/20/2009
Msg: 58 (view)
 
Relationships with Bartenders and Waitress
Posted: 4/11/2011 8:37:06 AM
^^^ One prime reason a person keeps their phone on... so a so can get a hold of them. What if she had an emergency situation going on?
That in itself seem suspicious to me. I don't ever turn my phone off. My so would know better to turn theirs off. dead batteries might happen once or twice, but it seems more like a lie imo.
Jus' because some of you aren't suspicious of your mates, doesn't mean she may not have cause to be. Op if your instinct is telling you something, listen to it, is my advice.
 ellena.
Joined: 3/20/2009
Msg: 50 (view)
 
Another Chance or too weird?
Posted: 4/10/2011 5:05:49 PM
Yeah it's wierd.
maybe tell him he's being too pushy w/ all the texting, etc. and see what happens from there.
 ellena.
Joined: 3/20/2009
Msg: 50 (view)
 
Relationships with Bartenders and Waitress
Posted: 4/10/2011 4:36:03 PM
Hmm... Doesn't sound good.
tell him this behavior has to stop, and tell him what you know . If it doesn't change, I'd say dump him or he'll dump all over you.
Had a similar experience wish I'd followed my own advice.
 ellena.
Joined: 3/20/2009
Msg: 18 (view)
 
To tell or not to tell? Damned if I do-Damned if I don't?
Posted: 4/8/2011 9:58:12 AM
I wasn't putting you down , op. In thinner world, we know we don't need to sleep w/ someone that quick (3 weeks is quic imo) to hold their attention. Fat women sleep w/ men automatically it seems.
You're not fat anymore. Your words: "I felt the timing was right". Feelings aren't facts.
Develop the thinner woman self -respect is what I'm trying to say. I 'm not trying to put you down.
Excess skin isn't attractive . We're you trying to prove he would ditch you cause you had this loose skin? Maybe you're looking for an excuse to gain the weight back?
I suggest you maintain your weight loss since you probably lost it for health reasons or to look more attractive. Having that loose skin removed is a good idea.
I know it takes time for me to find a man attractive.
You've found 2 in a relatively short time frame. Maybe that's weight loss related?
 ellena.
Joined: 3/20/2009
Msg: 6 (view)
 
To tell or not to tell? Damned if I do-Damned if I don't?
Posted: 4/8/2011 8:39:45 AM
Congrats on the weight loss.
Now that the weight is gone, maybe you can replace it w/ self respect.
Don't sleep w/ someone after 3 weeks.
It seems to me like (by what you write) that you're trying to prove something to someone .
 ellena.
Joined: 3/20/2009
Msg: 18 (view)
 
conversations between couples
Posted: 3/31/2011 12:01:51 PM
Some people are talkative, and it can be annoying at times.
Since she admitted she finds that w/ you, you have to learn to control yourself if you want to continue w/ her.
Let her open the communication at times, and remember you don't have to talk non-stop to be interesting.
In fact being less talkative may spruce up her interest.
 ellena.
Joined: 3/20/2009
Msg: 16 (view)
 
How to help a friend when she's stressed?
Posted: 3/31/2011 5:59:57 AM
Agree much w/ muscle-girl on this. Ask
her how you can help. If she doesn't tell you, back off. Leave her to to handle her troubles, and I'm sure you have enough of your own to focus on.
If not, well then I'm envious.
If you have so much time to focus on someone else's problems , maybe you could write a book on how to stay so problem free that you can focus on someone else's troubles.
I will buy it.
 ellena.
Joined: 3/20/2009
Msg: 21 (view)
 
dating different cultures and its clashes!!
Posted: 3/31/2011 5:28:15 AM
My name isn't, honey.
My suggestion: Move back to where you were born where people have the
same traditions, values, and culture. No more dilemma for you, see?
(ps take your father w/ you).
If you don't want to assimilate into American culture why expose yourself and others to unnecessary stress?
 ellena.
Joined: 3/20/2009
Msg: 15 (view)
 
Figuring out if he is bored with me.
Posted: 3/31/2011 2:40:06 AM
Go in w/ your eyes wide open.
He may also be seeing and "texting" others at the same time.
Guard yer heart. :)
 ellena.
Joined: 3/20/2009
Msg: 12 (view)
 
dating different cultures and its clashes!!
Posted: 3/31/2011 2:30:14 AM
Perhaps a little elaboration on my part. An American makes his own decisions.
A man makes his own decisions.
An American man doesn't need a passport to be in America.
If you weren't born in America, or you didn't gain citizenship thru legal means, You're not an American.
Since your gf is satisfied w/ your arrangement, I don't get your "beef".
.
 ellena.
Joined: 3/20/2009
Msg: 10 (view)
 
dating different cultures and its clashes!!
Posted: 3/31/2011 1:58:26 AM
You may consider youself an American man but I don't.
Don't know what kind of answer you're looking for.
 ellena.
Joined: 3/20/2009
Msg: 28 (view)
 
Taking a break from the relationship... what should I do?
Posted: 3/22/2011 12:41:05 AM
Seems like you want your cake and eat it too.
You're unhappy. That 's not love, imo.
You have to be honest to be fair to her.
Yes , she may be hurt, but she will survive. Everyone gets their heart broken. Maybe it's her time.
Jmo.
 ellena.
Joined: 3/20/2009
Msg: 5 (view)
 
Read me :) n let me know
Posted: 3/18/2011 1:18:58 PM
Well my first impression: You write a lot of what you want , nothing of what you bring to the table in all this. What do you have to offer?
Women will want to know what you have to offer.
Then in your profession, you reply, "I have one". That doesn't go over well. What do you do?
You sound like you want a lot, yet you have nothing to offer.
Happy
 ellena.
Joined: 3/20/2009
Msg: 42 (view)
 
Dating an adult who stutters.
Posted: 3/7/2011 12:37:24 PM
What ufc said.
I can listen to a stutterer, but I think it would be difficult if I had to do that a lot.
I would get frustrated waiting for the words to come out and would probably try to finish their sentences.
I think I remember reading/hearing somewhere that people who listen to their voices on tape will sometime have success to quit stuttering.
I guess your answer is : It will matter to some, and not to others.
Find someone who it won't matter to.
Good wishes doing that.
 ellena.
Joined: 3/20/2009
Msg: 19 (view)
 
Am I being naive or jaded? lol
Posted: 3/7/2011 12:31:06 PM
I have also been the "doormat"
I can empathize w/ that.
I do think there are honorable people out there. At least I'm still hoping so.

Good wishes.
 ellena.
Joined: 3/20/2009
Msg: 34 (view)
 
Dating an adult who stutters.
Posted: 3/6/2011 5:56:15 PM
Yes it would bother me.
There are ways to stop stutters.
John Stossel had a stutter. He's a reporter on tv now,so it can be done.
I don't know how, tho.
 ellena.
Joined: 3/20/2009
Msg: 187 (view)
 
Would you be in a poly relationship
Posted: 3/4/2011 8:25:32 PM
No effin' way !
This isn't a relationship to me, it's a wierdationship .
 ellena.
Joined: 3/20/2009
Msg: 34 (view)
 
Not showing up for a date
Posted: 2/15/2011 3:24:13 PM
The only one that can answer your question is the inconsiderate weasel that stood you up.
Sorry you went thru that.
 ellena.
Joined: 3/20/2009
Msg: 45 (view)
 
Why do women want a protector? I don't get it?
Posted: 2/15/2011 3:10:12 PM
I for one would like to know the man I'm with would be willing to protect me if the need arose.
Women aren't as strong as men (mostly), and can't fight them off.
Yes there are predators out there. not necessarily a 24/7 dilemma, but jerks are out there.
A man unwilling to protect me wouldn't have a chance w/ me.
I have protective measures I use, but I can't have them w/ me 24/7 either, so yes a man unwilling to protect is a pansy, and undesirable in my eyes.
Get it now?
 ellena.
Joined: 3/20/2009
Msg: 72 (view)
 
How do you feel about mfm and/or ffm threesomes?
Posted: 2/11/2011 6:28:28 AM
No . To me ,sex is an expression of the love 2 people share with one another.
Adding another party of either gender, would cheapen the experience for me.
I think of that as a disgusting behavior.
I don't have to try it to know that either. Just like I know I wouldn't enjoy putting on scuba gear, and exploring the ocean.
If push came to shove tho, hand me the scuba gear!
 ellena.
Joined: 3/20/2009
Msg: 16 (view)
 
projecting
Posted: 2/11/2011 6:22:20 AM
I notice this.
not only in romantic relationships, but at work, and with family too.
It's more than a little annoying.
As another poster wrote, I also usually notice that in hindsight.
 ellena.
Joined: 3/20/2009
Msg: 55 (view)
 
A man must love the woman more than the woman loves the man
Posted: 2/7/2011 6:23:30 AM
I can't really enlighten you on this.
I have heard that saying also though.
Shoot, asking this on a forum full of people with relationship issues, might not be your best resource.
 ellena.
Joined: 3/20/2009
Msg: 21 (view)
 
My boyfriend had a seizure...
Posted: 2/4/2011 7:59:33 PM
My dear, He alone is responsible for his dire condition.
Alcohol withdrawal is serious business.
Professional monitoring is sometimes required when someone decides to quit drinking.
His family isn't doing him any favors by coddling him, and making decisions he alone should be making for himself.
I hope good things for you.
 ellena.
Joined: 3/20/2009
Msg: 42 (view)
 
Posting new ads on craigslist daily
Posted: 2/3/2011 10:00:45 AM
You are aware that he is still looking, so that's a positive.
Don't let yourself become enamoured of him at this stage.
Let him know that you have seen his ads, and let him give you an explanation.
Maybe that'll clear things up for you.
 ellena.
Joined: 3/20/2009
Msg: 74 (view)
 
My 39 year old boyfriend gave me a love bite last night! Not happy!
Posted: 2/3/2011 9:53:18 AM
That's inappropriate for him to be marking your neck up.
Definately have a word w/ him about this not happening in the future. ..If there is a future.
That's an immature thing to do, and it be speaks of him in an unflattering light.
He is territorizing . Be afraid.
Off topic here , I love that emoticon sweetness( #16 ).
 ellena.
Joined: 3/20/2009
Msg: 289 (view)
 
Can a man be too tall to date?
Posted: 2/1/2011 8:51:50 PM
I don't find men that tall attractive.
6'2 is the limit. I'm 5'4" also.
My preference is 5' 10 ish.
 ellena.
Joined: 3/20/2009
Msg: 117 (view)
 
What would you do if they were still active on this site despite being intimate with you?
Posted: 1/30/2011 6:57:07 PM
I wouldn't like that either, but you have to actually verbalize this.
Guys will do whatever they can get away with is my experience.
You did the right thing to break it off, imo.
 ellena.
Joined: 3/20/2009
Msg: 30 (view)
 
Men Who Only Relate to Beautiful Women....
Posted: 1/22/2011 8:19:17 AM
I haven't noticed this phenomenon......unless he has money.
The secret green weapon!
 ellena.
Joined: 3/20/2009
Msg: 4 (view)
 
Can you all give me some advice.....
Posted: 1/20/2011 9:07:56 PM
Well mike, your pleasant enough looking .
Self -deprecation isn't attractive.
Take out the, I'm not the best looking, but....Bla bla, entirely!
Write more about your interests.
I also like to read about what someone is looking for in a potential partner.
Hope this helps.
Happy
 ellena.
Joined: 3/20/2009
Msg: 30 (view)
 
Anyone dated a man who talked about other women he fancied?
Posted: 1/20/2011 8:58:32 PM
Tacky is what that is.
I would be turned off by a guy like this. There would be no future relationship.
I'd say what are you doing out w/ me if your still interested in bla, bla, bla,?(fill in name).
If I didn't get an acceptable answer, I'd end the date right there.
Better dates!
 ellena.
Joined: 3/20/2009
Msg: 99 (view)
 
I hate my girlfriends best friend
Posted: 1/20/2011 8:49:57 PM
I think you should tell your gf how you feel about this situation. I wouldn't say you're being dumb.
You feel how you feel.
Proposing is big.
Best wishes!
 ellena.
Joined: 3/20/2009
Msg: 33 (view)
 
People who make up memories....
Posted: 1/9/2011 2:11:35 AM
Firstly, I looked closely at your picture (to make sure you're not mine).
Habitual liar. You made a good decision to leave. If she's not crazy, you soon will be by trying to sort out the fact from the fiction in her head.
My crystal ball says: You're not cursed.
 ellena.
Joined: 3/20/2009
Msg: 41 (view)
 
What would you consider worse???
Posted: 1/9/2011 1:52:42 AM
Firstly, I'm not a "couple" person so that wouldn't come into play.
Someone who went through my personal files wouldn't come in to play either.
You were both wrong in your own ways.
Who cares who's wronger (a new word, I invented) ?
You're both immature.
My crystal ball says if you stay together you will be successful at making each other's lives miserable.
Best Wishes
 ellena.
Joined: 3/20/2009
Msg: 58 (view)
 
Good hair..
Posted: 1/9/2011 1:43:59 AM
I have never met such a fellow .
Where can I find one?
Is there a club or sumpin'?
 ellena.
Joined: 3/20/2009
Msg: 128 (view)
 
When your date is a clepto!
Posted: 1/7/2011 10:30:10 AM
I wasn't going to come back to this thread cuz it's so ridiculous on so many levels. But now I'm glad I did. Really, Vannilli mssg. 114, I thought that only happened to me!
 ellena.
Joined: 3/20/2009
Msg: 157 (view)
 
Beauty Secrets for those over the age of 50
Posted: 1/7/2011 6:17:27 AM
Sometimes miss, I think that's good advice for us girls too.
For men I would add a clean shave w/ a teeny -bit of light scented smell-pretties on the neck. (I guess that could apply to some of us girls too )
 
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