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 Author Thread: Would it be a mistake if I...
 _allen_
Joined: 6/14/2009
Msg: 30 (view)
 
Would it be a mistake if I...
Posted: 9/12/2012 5:48:51 PM
Call first! She might be on another date ... literally!

But seriously, only 3 dates to which you would like to surprise her ill pet with flowers and a card? Really?
 _allen_
Joined: 6/14/2009
Msg: 76 (view)
 
how to handle people who stood you Up?
Posted: 9/10/2012 7:06:22 PM
My 'wait time' is 15 minutes. No communication outside of this timeframe, I usually chalk it up as a 'no-show' A no-call, no-show is a no-no for me. I'll usually make alternate plans after the 15 minute window has passed and expect never to see nor hear from that person again.

If my date called before hand informing me of her delay, exceptions are made and I have no issues waiting for her arrival. I'm a reasonable adult and understand life situations come about.
 _allen_
Joined: 6/14/2009
Msg: 222 (view)
 
looks or profile, what attracts you first?
Posted: 9/10/2012 2:42:18 PM
The Pic draws me in. The profile keeps me there a bit longer.
 _allen_
Joined: 6/14/2009
Msg: 79 (view)
 
Are there any good men left?
Posted: 9/8/2012 7:05:33 PM
Somewhere down the line, the subject went from "are there any good men left" to "where are the men based on my preference".

Maybe, just maybe ... this is the reason 'good men' aren't knocking down your doors?
 _allen_
Joined: 6/14/2009
Msg: 29 (view)
 
Last minute cancellations
Posted: 8/16/2012 10:05:19 PM
Cancellations? What is this? My online dates are usually no-call, no-shows.

At least your dates give you the courtesy of a "cancellation call". I usually bring a book or my notebook, expecting to be stood up. In case the inevitable happens, I might as well get some light work done or catch up on some reading.

Though, I never have this problem from women I meet IRL.
 _allen_
Joined: 6/14/2009
Msg: 25 (view)
 
Not married by 30, will it happen, ever?
Posted: 8/16/2012 9:17:29 PM

Over 30 I think you'll have a better chance at making a "mature" choice, rather than simply an emotional one.
And that choice make just be to stay single.
Marriage is not the only way to be with someone, nor does it ensure a lifetime of "togetherness".

^ This
Op, why are you allowing yourself to be pressure into marriage? The mature thing would be to find someone of quality worth your time. If it leads to marriage, then great if not ... even greater. There is nothing that says a person has to be married in order to enjoy a lifetime companionship with another.

You don't need a State signed and sealed union license to love someone.
 _allen_
Joined: 6/14/2009
Msg: 11 (view)
 
Ever run off on a date?
Posted: 4/28/2012 1:46:52 PM
No, I've never done such a thing. I have ended dates early when I felt the date wasn't going well.
 _allen_
Joined: 6/14/2009
Msg: 26 (view)
 
Being proactive on first meets
Posted: 4/24/2012 3:58:09 PM
While I don't feel as if I'm 'running out of time', I am at the age where my options are dwindling. It's no secret I look for women who've never married and childless. Nearing Forty in age, my pool of available suitors are are just about diminished.

I too received two of the following looks when on a first date.
1) Utter excitement to where I usually receive a HUGE, embracing hug -or-
2) Cold stare with an even colder handshake, and small smirk.

I like to give people the benefit of the doubt as I've have been told I'm 'a cold person' off first appearance. I will admit, the dates with women who are generally 'cold' have generally been the women I'm more interested in knowing. Like minded, I guess.

In both cases, whether I'm interested in the woman or not, if the date isn't going well for either of us I'm usually the one who decides to end it early on a pleasant note. No use wasting our time with forced conversation.
 _allen_
Joined: 6/14/2009
Msg: 29 (view)
 
So who should talk to who?
Posted: 4/17/2012 3:30:06 PM

"My sleeping habits are so messed up, right now. I stayed up all night last night, fell asleep at1pm, woke up briefly at 7pm, and now I'm awake again."


Was that his reply? Is that all he gave you?

If so, sounds like he's not interested. Keep moving if he didn't pick up where the two of you left off last conversation.
 _allen_
Joined: 6/14/2009
Msg: 15 (view)
 
Should these be red flags?
Posted: 4/17/2012 3:14:19 PM
First, she has a kid. That's an instant deal breaker in my book. She's only 22. She's doing what most 22 year old do these day - looking for fun and a good time. Of course she's on FB all the time. I wouldn't be surprised if she was juggling multiple guys for her attention.

Everything you've told us about her is a 'red flag' but only if you see it as so. Most guys would see her as a huge red flag and would proceed with caution. You should do the same. Don't jump into any relationship with your nose wide open. Get to know her if you're really into her. If these red flags are 'too bright' for you to ignore, move on.

At the moment, it's clear she's not exactly what you're looking for in a mate. If not, why are you still communicating with her?
 _allen_
Joined: 6/14/2009
Msg: 15 (view)
 
Does it seem like more and more men only want casual?
Posted: 4/17/2012 2:54:20 PM
Blame the Feminist Movement and one-sided legal structure for mans lack of relationship/matrimonial commitment. No man in his right mind will accept any woman's terms of marriage these day, especially knowing the system is and will be the failure of him later on.

These days, it's best to keep things casual. In the event, things doesn't work out for either party, he'll have the option of washing his hands clean of the situation/relationship and move on without a loss of pride, self-worth and personal finances.

Let's be honest. It's extremely easy for men to get laid these days. Why would any man want to buy a wife? Too much of a liability, if you ask me. :-/
 _allen_
Joined: 6/14/2009
Msg: 25 (view)
 
Dating Game - when to contact after a GOOD date
Posted: 2/28/2012 4:28:38 PM
Unsubscribe me out of these dating games. I'm not one who likes to play games when it comes to people's feelings and relationships. If I like you, I will call you. I expect the same, assuming my date or woman of interest held a liking towards me. No games, just two people enjoying each others company and saying so.
 _allen_
Joined: 6/14/2009
Msg: 63 (view)
 
Musical taste being a dealbreaker?
Posted: 2/9/2012 7:21:58 PM
Her musical taste isn't a dealbreaker as long as I'm not forced to listen her preferences.

I'm an audiophile! I'm the guy you see who always has ear buds on EVERYWHERE I go. Yeah, I'm that guy! I have playlist stacked on top of playlists on my Spotify account, who doesn't mind spending hundreds or thousands of $ on various brands of headphones and/or earbuds.

My musical tastes varies but I can say, I'm really not into anything mainstream. I frequent bars and musical lounges each weekend listing to live music. My idea of fun is spending a Sunday morning discovering new music/artists, putting together new playlists, etc.
 _allen_
Joined: 6/14/2009
Msg: 18 (view)
 
Have you ever faked or done this?
Posted: 2/8/2012 9:25:01 AM
When in doubt, bail out! -This is what I always say.

One small lie could open up a Pandora's Box of larger lies to come.

Never had any woman lie about being a widower, but I've had my fair share of married, recently divorced, and/or separated women mark themselves as "single".

[Note: I don't date married, divorced, nor separated women]
 _allen_
Joined: 6/14/2009
Msg: 6 (view)
 
Is it okay to criticize your date's appearance?
Posted: 2/7/2012 8:02:13 AM
Why must one be so critical and disrespectful to another? Why must one always look forward to a negative point-of-view of others?

To use the example given, how does his tight jeans (i.e. style of wear) effect you directly?

Better yet, why are you NOT seeking for ways to get to know this person better, like an adult?
 _allen_
Joined: 6/14/2009
Msg: 7 (view)
 
Is anyone else dealing with extremes?
Posted: 2/7/2012 6:16:35 AM
^^^ @triplek, Hit the nail on the head! Period. I could not have said it better myself. ^^^
 _allen_
Joined: 6/14/2009
Msg: 39 (view)
 
Forum Folks/Active Daters: Shall the Twain Meet?
Posted: 2/7/2012 5:52:21 AM

@lauramae18 - There isn't anything I say here I wouldn't say to you if I met you face to face.

Same here. There isn't anything I would say here I would not say in my POF profile nor face-t0-face conversations.

Once upon a time, I heard a rumor POF was thinking of linking users forum posts to their dating profile. I'd welcome this feature!

My dating profile, photos, and forum posts are all the Real Me!
 _allen_
Joined: 6/14/2009
Msg: 8 (view)
 
Alcohol
Posted: 2/6/2012 6:18:06 PM
Maybe he realized you're more fun to be around all-tanked up?

On a serious note, why are you asking us, the POF forumites this question? Isn't this the type of conversation you should take up with him?

You've been involved for 8 months, sounds like a relationship to me! So shouldn't the two of you sit down and have a one-on-one if you feel he's getting you liquored up before your Saturday night dating sessions?

I don't know, just something two consenting adults would do. Just a thought!
 _allen_
Joined: 6/14/2009
Msg: 36 (view)
 
Forum Folks/Active Daters: Shall the Twain Meet?
Posted: 2/6/2012 3:50:41 PM
I've just about separated myself from POF dating side. Not enough qualified suitors that fits my idea woman on POF.

Besides, I do much better IRL. Obtaining dates from women who are in the high ranges of 8-10's IRL, than being turned down by women who I would gauge as between 2-3's on POF.

I'm pretty much here for the forums only (if time permits, of course).
 _allen_
Joined: 6/14/2009
Msg: 22 (view)
 
Would you rather date A Tommy Girl or Girly Girl?
Posted: 2/6/2012 2:12:22 PM
I prefer women who are feminine. No man(ish) qualities need apply.
 _allen_
Joined: 6/14/2009
Msg: 333 (view)
 
Do you feel comfortable dating someone who is seperated
Posted: 2/6/2012 2:01:46 PM
Absolutely not.

Rule #1. Keep drama as far as possible.

Separated, Divorced, and Mothers all fall into my Dating Rule #1.
 _allen_
Joined: 6/14/2009
Msg: 1665 (view)
 
can non-pot smokers handle pot smokers?
Posted: 2/6/2012 1:58:12 PM
The closest thing to drugs in my life is Chocolate or Caramel, and the occasional glass of wine once or twice a year.

I'm "Straight Edge". Not because it's trendy but because I've always been. Never had the desire to smoke, snort, nor drink anything of substance; whether legal or illegal.

Not to say I've taken a moral high ground. I for sure do not look down on those who do drugs/alcohol. Those activities just never interested me.

Would I date someone who smokes pot? Probably not. Not a fan of the smell nor activity, but mostly it's the smell. Makes me nauseous. Same goes with cig smokers. I hate smoke. Alcoholics (aka drunks) need not apply as I hate what people become when intoxicated. Disgusting to say the least. Just not my preference in company.
 _allen_
Joined: 6/14/2009
Msg: 11 (view)
 
He is not attractive
Posted: 1/31/2012 10:48:31 AM
End it!

This "Good Guy" deserves someone who'd appreciate him for the man he is, not what you want him to be.
 _allen_
Joined: 6/14/2009
Msg: 132 (view)
 
Dating men who have never been married
Posted: 1/26/2012 4:36:18 PM
@maybeemee

We'd be best friends if I knew you in the real world!
Unfortunately, not a lot of women see single, never married and childless men the way you do.

Not everyone has the need to be married. Not everyone wants/desire children. I've been called everything in the book from egoistical, selfish, narcissistic, self-centered, pompous, and the list goes on. (Personally I like to look at myself as "Independent") I'm free to do what I please when I please. I enjoy the freedom to travel, have a career, actively pursue my hobbies, ongoing education, make friends, make money and enjoy the fruits of my labor, etc.

I've always felt there's more to life than hitching my trailer to one idea.

My "endgame" isn't marriage for a variety of reasons, but overall I feel there's nothing in the Institute of Marriage for men. (I'll leave it at that. Will not discuss it any further. This is another topic for another day).

I guess overall, fair-is-fair. I don't date women who are separated, divorced, and/or have children. In turn, most women won't date me because I will never settle down.

BTW, you're sister's relationship is exactly what I've been striving for. Who say, one has to be married to enjoy a lasting relationship?
 _allen_
Joined: 6/14/2009
Msg: 99 (view)
 
Should A POF member approach you in public?
Posted: 1/21/2012 6:45:53 PM
My first and only POF approach in public was a surprising pleasant one.

Nice woman recognize me from POF on my morning commute. Had a very pleasant conversation about our POF experience.

I now see her quite often on our morning passing and occasionally enjoy a coffee (her) and tea (me) for breakfast, at least once a week now. I guess one could say, we're friends now!
 _allen_
Joined: 6/14/2009
Msg: 16 (view)
 
Chemistry
Posted: 1/21/2012 6:32:48 PM
Maybe the "Chemistry" was only on your end -OP.

From what I've perceived from your story is, you did "work" for the woman. Only after the work was complete, she sent you packing. With that, you're worrying if you humiliated her, somehow?

Just remember, first instinct is usually the correct one. Why pine over someone who obviously doesn't feel the same as you do about her?
 _allen_
Joined: 6/14/2009
Msg: 84 (view)
 
My Dog Will Have to Approve Of You
Posted: 1/21/2012 5:26:15 PM
Dog's approval? Yeah, not a dependency I favor in a women.
 _allen_
Joined: 6/14/2009
Msg: 34 (view)
 
Does the reverse dating psychology work?
Posted: 1/20/2012 7:05:04 AM

@cooldog65 - Sounds like the back handed compliment technique I have heard on the Tom Leykis show. Part of the Leykis 101 course.


Love Tom Leykis! He's been my Dating Advisor since day one, when I heard him spoke over the airwaves. The man speaks nothing but truth, the whole truth, on top of the truth.

In the beginning, a few years back, when I decided to take my dating more seriously it was him who taught me to raise the bar in every aspect of my life (i.e. career, women, self, lifestyle, etc). Never accept anything less. If I "bring it", she'll have to bring it x2.
 _allen_
Joined: 6/14/2009
Msg: 20 (view)
 
Do super-hotties want to get f*cked?
Posted: 1/19/2012 7:53:06 PM
Unfortunately, this method of communication does work with woman on sooo many different levels.

I've know guys whom written out detailed, polite messages to "sub-par" women and get no response. Then there are those guys whom written some of the crudest and rudest, most insulting messages imaginable and more time than none, they'll get a response back. A negative response, but a response none-the-less.

It speaks volumes and reminds me why I keep my standards in the women I meet soooo high.
 _allen_
Joined: 6/14/2009
Msg: 23 (view)
 
''just friends''
Posted: 1/19/2012 7:38:44 PM
I don't date women to be their friend.

I have more than enough friends to play the part of, you guessed it, friends.

If any woman (i.e. date) puts you in the "friend-zone, please move on. There's zero chance for the two of you to ever become intimate and/or an item. She's made up in her mind that their is nothing attractive about you to her. Don't let her string you along as her plaything (i.e. someone to call when she gets bored, fights with her boyfriend, needs money, an ego boaster, etc).
 _allen_
Joined: 6/14/2009
Msg: 6 (view)
 
Would you kiss on a 1st date just to test the Chemistry??
Posted: 1/17/2012 5:39:19 PM

Would you kiss on a 1st date to test the chemistry?

Short answer, No!

I have issues with strangers touching me. I don't care how cute/attractive she may be. Just like my trust, a touch must be earned.

Besides the point, I don't believe in "romantic chemistry". It's another Hollywood, fairy tale idea that's instilled in women at a young age. (i.e. Think most romantic comedy movies).

Sure, kissing and sex are fun activities but in the end, it's all based on a chemical reaction of the brain. Some may even say, it's all a form of lust.

Sooner or later, the lust dies and the two of you will want to talk. Only then will this be the deciding factor if whether or not you're truly into a person. (i.e. share common interests, goals, understandings, etc)
 _allen_
Joined: 6/14/2009
Msg: 53 (view)
 
I'll f**k you but I won't date you
Posted: 1/13/2012 6:54:20 PM

@Discordiaa
If you WANT better, BE better.
If you want a quality gent, be a quality chick.


Love this quote!
This is, in short, my Quality of Standards.
I will not compromise it, either.

OP, you need to aim higher and only choose those worth your time. Leave the left-overs, have-beens, throw-backs, and never-weres for someone else.
 _allen_
Joined: 6/14/2009
Msg: 23 (view)
 
WTF? Havent dated in 21 years
Posted: 1/13/2012 6:42:37 PM
OP,
I was thinking, maybe your date was following the "3-day rule" (i.e. wait 3 days before calling so he doesn't seem too desperate).

(Reminds me of the movie "Swingers" - love that telephone scene)

You've only just met, give the guy time. I doubt anyone would call you the following day after the 1st date.

Give the guy 3-5 days to call before signing him off.
 _allen_
Joined: 6/14/2009
Msg: 37 (view)
 
Tarnished women
Posted: 1/13/2012 6:34:05 PM
Op, don't date anyone who can't see or get by past barriers.

It's a waste of your time. They're holding on to something or someone for a reason and in that, you'll never get through. Lose causes.

Move on to people with no barriers, happy about who they are, and who enjoy life. Fact of the matter, life is too short for you to attempt to "fix" others, unless you get paid to do so (i.e. psychiatrist or psychologist).
 _allen_
Joined: 6/14/2009
Msg: 26 (view)
 
how far are you willing to drive?
Posted: 1/12/2012 5:19:29 PM
Overall, I'm not a fan of Long Distance Relationships. But lets face facts, there is a whole world outside of your local area code to where one might meet someone with promise.

The reality of it is, you may never find a promising relationship with someone within 75 miles of your city limits. Sometimes its good to meet people from different city, culture, race, creed, sect, religion, etc.

Though I'm not a fan of LDR, I do understand why some of them work while others fail. The one's who fail, are usually the ones who are looking for instant gratification or the "lets make it all happen NOW". The ones who succeed with LDR are those who understand it's a completely different dynamic and willing to put for the time, commitment, and most importantly, TRUST that goes with attempting LDR.

The older I become, the more I realize there is more beyond my city limits. Part of my "growing up" has made me realize, it's ok to look beyond my comfort zone. Because of this, I have open myself to the idea of a LDR.

For example, I travel to/from NYC a few times per year on business. If I met a nice woman, who lived in NYC/NJ, willing to put forth the commitment of a LDR, I'd have no problems planning my trips around her and/or her schedule. That way, when I am in town, I could put forth some serious effort in seeing this amazing woman ... and she'd have to be AMAZING and well worth the LDR.

Because of advances in technology, communication would not be a problem. We have video chat sessions, social networks, SMS/texting, free unlimited domestic mobile calling, etc. So the idea of an LDR is possible as long as she's worth the time, commitment, and obstacles that all comes from LDR.
 _allen_
Joined: 6/14/2009
Msg: 9 (view)
 
Date a woman that says she loves her ex husband like a brother?
Posted: 1/12/2012 4:02:19 PM
Fortunately, I don't date women with children, separated, and/or divorced.

Overall, I don't see a problem with her being friends with her Ex. She's not hiding him from you as she's told you about him and the relationship (i.e. friendship) they have.

Honesty is good in my book. I can't find enough women to be honest with themselves when it comes to their ex-husbands and kid(s). Oh, yes, I've dated a few women who blatantly lied about the fact she has kid(s), ex-husband, and/or separated.

If the relationship with her ex-husband bothers you, you should break it off as I highly doubt she'll change just because you want her to. If you can live with it, then do so in an adult manner (i.e. befriend the ex-husband).

Believe it or not, many ex-couples do better as "friends" than did as a married couple.
 _allen_
Joined: 6/14/2009
Msg: 26 (view)
 
awkward silences
Posted: 1/12/2012 3:51:06 PM
I usually hold enough conversation for the both of us.

If things get silent, it's usually because I'm trying to allow my date to get a word in, but if she genuinely doesn't have much to contribute, I'll keep chatting away ... usually about myself.

I'm always a fan of discussions that revolve around ME!
 _allen_
Joined: 6/14/2009
Msg: 19 (view)
 
how long did it take you to get used to online dating
Posted: 1/10/2012 4:46:59 PM
My profile still listed as "single" after all these years.

When I find the secret to online communication, I'll let you know.

Apparently, I'm just as clueless as someone who signed up for POF for the first time.
 _allen_
Joined: 6/14/2009
Msg: 13 (view)
 
What does it mean We are still dating
Posted: 1/10/2012 4:31:34 PM
Everything is going well but we still don't know each other very well. We are still dating.

He answered your question! He doesn't know you well enough to become an "exclusive" couple. Therefore, he would like to continue "dating" if you'll have him. Him saying this isn't a riddle, of some sort. He's telling you he is not ready to settle down with you yet until he feels you're the women he's ready to officially call his "girlfriend".

At the same time, the word "dating" means he could possibly be seeing or dating other women. Remember, the word "dating" just means two people who are attempting to know more about one another.

Now, if you feel the two of you are ready for an "exclusive" relationship, you really need to sit down with him and talk. Tell him! He can't read minds. He does not know what YOU want from this relationship unless you tell him. This isn't grade school anymore. Adults sit down and discuss these things without rushing into anything so brash. Communication is key to any relationship, not assumption.

So, if you're serious about him (i.e. the relationship), have a sit down and state your case. Once you get your answer from him, then the two of you should decide where the two of you are going (i.e. an exclusive relationship , more dating, or part ways).
 _allen_
Joined: 6/14/2009
Msg: 12 (view)
 
Do you remember your first-time seeing women without makeup?
Posted: 1/10/2012 7:15:07 AM
I avoid dating women who wears make-up. I truly prefer women to not wear anything on their face, other than moisturizer and such.

I prefer the natural look of a lot of women.
 _allen_
Joined: 6/14/2009
Msg: 63 (view)
 
gift certificates used on a date
Posted: 1/7/2012 6:15:14 PM

@maleman999 - What should you do if you have a gift certificate or coupon for coffee at Starbucks or Tim Hortons. Should you use it or will it be a turn off to the date if you use it to get free coffee?


I do use a "coupon", per se, at Starbucks. I have a Starbucks card and always insist I pay for my dates coffee, tea, or desert. My Starbucks purchases allow me to earn Starbuck's "Rewards" points by using my Starbucks card and/or Starbucks Android App.

Put it this way, I have a GOLD Starbucks card (w/ my full name printed on it and all) because I've acquired so many Rewards Points. This always allows me free drinks, free refills, free flavorings, free soymilk, etc. Most of the time, my date has no idea we're enjoying "free" drinks/re-fills because my Rewards points earned.

Here's the kicker, I don't even like Starbucks coffee! So, you can image how many first and second meetings I have at Starbucks to acquire all these freebies.
 _allen_
Joined: 6/14/2009
Msg: 62 (view)
 
gift certificates used on a date
Posted: 1/7/2012 6:01:19 PM
What's with all the hate against the Olive Garden? It's a great place for two people to enjoy a nice casual meal.

Pasta, rich sauces, unlimited soup and salad ... all for an affordable price in a stress-free atmosphere. What's not to like?

Would Macaroni Grill, Maggiano's, or Carabba's be more acceptable? Though, these places are a bit more expensive, there all within the same level of the Olive Garden.
 _allen_
Joined: 6/14/2009
Msg: 30 (view)
 
Uggg Dating
Posted: 1/7/2012 8:56:29 AM
Op, have the two of you met yet or just "chatting"?

I'm under the impression you haven't met him physically, yet you implied the two of you are "dating" (based on the title of this thread).
 _allen_
Joined: 6/14/2009
Msg: 355 (view)
 
Can women REALLY get laid whenever they want?
Posted: 1/7/2012 3:29:08 AM
I beg to disagree with the topic. I don't believe women can get laid whenever they want. I've been propositioned many time before and have declined their advances.

I believe the sexual battlefield are equal for women as they are for men. I know some of the most beautiful women ever, who couldn't pay to get a date, and these are some beautiful women. Just as I know some wildly handsome guys who have to hardest time getting women to even look their way.

ON A SIDE NOTE: What I'm confused about is, very average looking guys who dates and/or married to beautiful women. I don't know. I'm finally opening my eyes to this but over the past few months, I'm noticing couples like this. Boggles my mind
 _allen_
Joined: 6/14/2009
Msg: 36 (view)
 
Do you get nervous on your first dates?
Posted: 1/6/2012 5:01:53 PM
I don't do "first dates" nor do I do "interviews". I see it as two people who've just met and getting to know one another. Nothing more, nothing less.

I usually go into a meet without any expectations. Just me wanting to learn a bit about her, have a few laughs (if possible), enjoy our drinks, and leave on a high note. That's a successful meet for me. That's my end game.

Whether she enjoyed my company or not is all on her. Overall, if I enjoyed myself and her company, I'll pass her my personal information (i.e. mobile/SMS number and email), leaving the ball in her court if she would like for "us" to continue.

No stress on me and none on her.
 _allen_
Joined: 6/14/2009
Msg: 8 (view)
 
What is the worst way you were ever dumped?
Posted: 1/6/2012 4:47:09 PM
Dated a beautiful young lady for several months. Over Saturday morning breakfast, she informed me of career heightening opportunity.

Her: I have a surprise?
Me: I like surprises!

Her: I got a new job!!!
Me: That's wonderful, love!

Her: Here is the best part ...
Her: It's in New Zealand!!!
Me: ... wait, what?

Me: When are you expected to ship off?
Her: Monday morning!!!
Me: ...

(True story)
 _allen_
Joined: 6/14/2009
Msg: 12 (view)
 
gift certificates used on a date
Posted: 1/6/2012 4:14:35 PM
I don't think it's tacky. In fact, it's sort of endearing for him to want to share his free meal (i.e. certificate) with her. She should feel honored. Most guys receive certificates with the intent of only gifting themselves.

BTW, why would she care how "he" pays for the meal. She gets a nice "free" meal out of the deal. With a little luck and conversation, maybe more will develop between the two (assuming she accepts his offer to dinner).
 _allen_
Joined: 6/14/2009
Msg: 13 (view)
 
Am I not understanding the rules?
Posted: 1/2/2012 1:01:20 PM
This is probably why dating goes right over my head! I had no idea there where "rules" to dating?

I just assume, I've not heard from a person for a while, they either were not interested and/or moved on to the next person on their list.

Huh, go figure.

Op, I'm with you on this. Two weeks without a word and I would have assumed he'd lost interested and moved on.

In any case, you should move on. Another time wasting flake.
 _allen_
Joined: 6/14/2009
Msg: 24 (view)
 
Meet Me - profiles read before saying Yes/No??
Posted: 1/1/2012 2:34:29 PM
If there isn't an actually email from said person who "wants to meet me", I usually delete those "Meet Me" emails.

This feature of POF is nothing more than a form of window shopping without the intent on buying or the equivalent of visiting Amazon.com and adding an item(s) to their "Wish List" with no intent on buying.
 _allen_
Joined: 6/14/2009
Msg: 30 (view)
 
Umm wow, k thanx bye
Posted: 1/1/2012 1:42:28 PM
My personal POF dating Rule #2 - Never handout personal information (i.e. mobile number, SMS, email, social contact information, etc) unless I know for sure she's mentally and emotionally stable person.

Somewhere alone the line, she was under the impression the two of you were an "exclusive item". I'm not sure what you said or did to lead her to this impression, non-the-less it's good you see her actions now as opposed to later.

Kill-off all communications with her and continue your search. This is a new year to begin with a fresh start with women of quality who will be worth your time. Don't fall back into "last years" throwbacks. Reach higher. Demand more from yourself and your date(s).
 
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