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 Author Thread: How frequenty should a couple be having sex for my age 39?
 Rb_64
Joined: 7/22/2009
Msg: 50 (view)
 
How frequenty should a couple be having sex for my age 39?
Posted: 5/12/2013 6:39:02 AM
Bebedeleau -
What about the 40-49 year olds.........like rabbits or not at all?.
 rb_64
Joined: 7/22/2009
Msg: 45 (view)
 
How frequenty should a couple be having sex for my age 39?
Posted: 5/11/2013 11:03:29 PM
Stu.....you must have dated the wrong women. I see no reason to get remarried if it doesn't include frequent sex and occasional BJs on demand......
 Rb_64
Joined: 7/22/2009
Msg: 13 (view)
 
How to tell if you've moved past friends with benefits
Posted: 5/10/2013 12:17:48 PM
In my mind, trying to decipher the actions of another and categorize them is fruitless without actually asking the person what is what...in this case the male party in the FWB situation. He is the only one who can say for certain what he wants or doesn't want and even then he may choose to be in denial or just outright lie about his intentions. (Both genders can avoid the truth if they choose in FWB situations).

My advice. Enjoy an FWB without analysis. End it if you have strong feelings that are not reciprocated or develop hopes for long-term. If you want to date a man and develop a legitimate relationship, then start out dating him. Rarely do FWBs turn into real relationships, they usually just become real long FWB situations and you may pass up other opportunities.

Absolute rule: never keep an FWB on the side if you are serious about dating other people....
 Rb_64
Joined: 7/22/2009
Msg: 39 (view)
 
How frequenty should a couple be having sex for my age 39?
Posted: 5/10/2013 11:59:48 AM
I needed a good chuckle in the middle of my work day......glad I stopped by this thread.

Stu - totally agree with you on this one.
Wolf - I am also LMAO about the odd pattern of TuMuchFun
GrayJake - I think your running commentary while doing it was hysterical!

OP, like most have said this is really dependent on the couple and the key element is that the couple agrees on frequency, type of activity, number of participants, public or private, etc........ When there is a disconnect early on, there will always be a disconnect. No need to be rude to the girl. If you want to move on, then lay it out truthfully and move on.

Regarding the age component of your question. I'm in my forties and feel the same as I did at all other ages. Sex with the right man could happen everyday, multiple times a day if we both had the time, energy and other logistical aspects lined up. When I dated a man ten years younger than me, we did it every chance we had, every date included some strong component of intimacy at least once if not multiple times. When I was married to a man ten years older, we had sex on his schedule....and some months that was only once. I am not interested in dating anyone with a low/no interest in regular sexual intimacy. People have to communicate this upfront.

If my partner and I live together, then I have an expectation of intimacy happening a few times a week. Some weeks everyday would be great, some weeks when I am working 16 hour days...then 2-3-4 times might happen. Dating and not living together is different, so you really can't base the number of times you have sex on the number of days in a month.....it can only be based on the number of days you actually see each other.
 rb_64
Joined: 7/22/2009
Msg: 4 (view)
 
Cheats on me with other men while out of town on business
Posted: 4/22/2013 9:31:51 PM
Dump and run if you are not cool with this.....it will never change no matter what he tells you. He will only go further underground. Don't berate him, he has a right to make his own choices. I went through this in a marriage. There is no one to blame. It just is what it is.
 Rb_64
Joined: 7/22/2009
Msg: 4 (view)
 
Deleted/Hidden Profile After a First Date?
Posted: 4/14/2013 9:36:16 PM
Hard to tell with guys why they do anything....sometimes they don't know. (And to be gender fair the same could be said of women)

I did have a similar experience. Met a man here, chatted a bit, set a meet/greet......had a nice easy conversation and laughs, hugs when we met and when we parted. Nothing seemed odd or off. We both work the same industry and had much in common. His profile vanished shortly after our meet. I gave it a couple of days and then sent him a nice text mentioning I notice his profile was gone. Apparently, another gal got really angry with him for not getting serious after the first meet and he decided to eliminate his profile because in our line of work - public safety - psycho contacts are not a good idea. He told me there were a couple other gals he was chatting with and was going to take it slow to see where things go. We left our conversation on good terms. Some meets work out some don't.

Give it a couple days/few days and send him a nice text to find out if there is another date in his mind. Good luck!
 rb_64
Joined: 7/22/2009
Msg: 42 (view)
 
My History on sex (getting laid)
Posted: 4/14/2013 6:02:50 PM
To each his/her own...... I understand sharing opinions, but I just still can't understand judge and jury comments condemning people with different opinions. Some people need to chillax a bit and worry about themselves and not label others.

Cowboy - I agree, "wild monkey sex" with a stranger beats the hell out of dead fish sex with someone you know well.

Tumuchfun - bang on, you are right - some women do want to just "knock boots" on occasion.

Personally, I would prefer to knock boots during wild monkey sex with someone I know and love deeply who feels the same about me. But, I am not going to wait ten years in celibacy for that relationship to happen when the hot rugby guy is chatting me up in the moment and wants to have some fun. Would I want a stranger every night, no way.

When does a stranger no longer bear the label stranger? After you have a real name and contact info, or is there a magic number of hours/dates??
 RB_64
Joined: 7/22/2009
Msg: 30 (view)
 
How Important is Sex in a Relationship????
Posted: 4/11/2013 7:02:17 AM
MUST have sex!!!! Preferably this morning............oh damn, I woke up alone.
 RB_64
Joined: 7/22/2009
Msg: 6 (view)
 
Are girls attracted to a user name?
Posted: 4/10/2013 11:56:20 PM
Totally agree with previous posters. Some profile names are just really poor choices and are huge turn-offs.
 RB_64
Joined: 7/22/2009
Msg: 9 (view)
 
How to recover from a awkward first kiss????
Posted: 4/10/2013 7:18:59 AM
"Have awkward sex" - best response. Perhaps not as recoverable, but still funny.
 RB_64
Joined: 7/22/2009
Msg: 12 (view)
 
whats she telling me?
Posted: 4/9/2013 11:21:51 PM
There are many factors to explore and paths that can be taken based on the relatively limited information shared. If you want to marry her and at one point she wanted to marry you, then you two may have something that can become a relationship headed to the alter. But, you won't make it there on your own or only with advice found on the forum. My best recommendation would be to find a good pre-marital counselor and get some assistance in discussing the obstacles before you.

Personally, I believe that intimacy is the foundation of a marriage and unless the couple is open, honest and on the same page regarding intimacy, then the chance of longevity in the relationship is slim.

Best of luck to you.
 RB_64
Joined: 7/22/2009
Msg: 4 (view)
 
How to recover from a awkward first kiss????
Posted: 4/9/2013 11:09:09 PM
It sounds like you had a great time together. Girls don't expect perfection every time.....humility wins out win an awkward moment can be laughed off. Next time the moment will be right and your timing/her timing will be in synch. Enjoy your next kiss!
 RB_64
Joined: 7/22/2009
Msg: 38 (view)
 
Good Morning Text
Posted: 4/9/2013 5:29:59 PM
Personally, I love to see text messages when I first wake up. It lets me know my friends or relatives across the country were thinking about me. I have one male friend who just sends GM instead of taking the time to write out the words - the text, albeit brief, always makes me smile. Try to enjoy the little things.....we never know when the sender might leave this earth....

You do have a choice not to respond.....I guarantee after a couple no responses the guy won't bother you again.
 RB_64
Joined: 7/22/2009
Msg: 46 (view)
 
When to hide or delete a profile
Posted: 4/8/2013 8:19:56 PM
If the profile becomes an issue for either party and the relationship has serious potential then by all means hide it, change the status or delete it. I just had that convo tonight and changed my profile for a man I am crazy about getting to know better. Personally, it doesn't matter to me at all, but it did matter to him and he matters to me.
 RB_64
Joined: 7/22/2009
Msg: 11 (view)
 
Facebook and Women
Posted: 4/8/2013 8:16:27 PM
Agree with Five-Marie.....you are over-thinking FB friendships. If you are still interested, contact her. If you are not interested and bothered by the social media connection, then unfriend her. If it really doesn't matter, and really it shouldn't, then do nothing. I have hundreds of FB friends, I can't possibly chat with everyone all the time. The only person I ever unfriended was my sister because she was making judgmental posts on my page (ended up refriending her). I considered defriending my mom for the same reason, but she is old and just doesn't get social media ethics.
 RB_64
Joined: 7/22/2009
Msg: 22 (view)
 
Men over 50 and sex
Posted: 4/8/2013 4:15:07 PM
I think it is just the men you have met. I would not classify men over 50 the way you have in your post. I have had amazing sex with men over 50 in the past..... In my mind, age is relatively irrelevant when it comes to sexual partners. Having a full discussion about sex - likes/dislikes, frequency values, expectations of when/where - prior to going at it will alleviate disappointing results. (Assuming the conversation is honest)
 RB_64
Joined: 7/22/2009
Msg: 24 (view)
 
Why people Lie about their Sexual organ and Physical attributes???
Posted: 4/8/2013 4:09:03 PM
Humans will lie about just about anything.....

One man I went out with twice had the whopper of all lies. His photos were accurate, height/weight as described, interesting personality/stories........but whoops - failed to mention he was married, failed to mention he fibbed on the military background he shared, failed to provide correct first name......but the best part was that he failed to mention he was under Federal indictment for Stolen Valor, and Embezzlement charges in the millions of dollars. After seeing a few red flags, I ran a deep internet search on his phone number and found his correct name which led to all sorts of media hits about his shady character.
 rb_64
Joined: 7/22/2009
Msg: 24 (view)
 
So....How many of you actually meet someone IRL from here?
Posted: 4/8/2013 2:08:41 PM
I have met a number of men IRL from online sites. Some I dated, some I became friends with and some I never heard from again after the first meet. Success really depends on how well you filter the people you choose to meet and how much effort you put into getting to know the other person. I won't chase men, so if someone chooses not to contact me after a first meet, then I don't stress too much. The key factor in successful relationships is communication with an open and honest dialogue where both parties feel safe to express their opinions without judgement. I have a fabulous conversation going on with a POF site member that will move to an IRL meeting soon; distance is an obstacle for us or we would already have met IRL.
 RB_64
Joined: 7/22/2009
Msg: 13 (view)
 
Men over 50 and sex
Posted: 4/8/2013 8:42:04 AM
FYI - Viagra is used with women. http://www.webmd.com/sexual-conditions/news/20080722/viagra-for-
 Rb_64
Joined: 7/22/2009
Msg: 51 (view)
 
What Underwear Drives Him Wild
Posted: 4/8/2013 7:38:50 AM
Lead the parade of panties? Sure, why not, but I get to select my audience.
 Rb_64
Joined: 7/22/2009
Msg: 8 (view)
 
If you were the other woman - would you want to know?
Posted: 4/6/2013 7:29:21 AM
Tell her. You are still married, so send her a simple statement. You don't have to engage in drama, just state the barest of facts and let it go.
 RB_64
Joined: 7/22/2009
Msg: 19 (view)
 
What Underwear Drives Him Wild
Posted: 4/5/2013 7:17:55 AM
Hey Stubidooo......maybe the girls should just post panty photos? Perhaps a thread titled "panties on parade" would be appropriate. ROFLMAO
 RB_64
Joined: 7/22/2009
Msg: 43 (view)
 
Is this true:basically men want a sexy woman/women want a successful man?
Posted: 4/5/2013 7:11:55 AM
Of course I want a successful man, why in the world would any one set their sights on finding an unsuccessful mate?? I also want him to want me for the duration of our relationship, so I keep a sexy attitude and take care of myself. Successful and sexy are both terms that can be defined multiple ways, but really the only definitions that matter are the way two people who are attracted to each other define the terms for themselves and each other.

The best part of this POF journey for me is that I am engaged in an amazing conversation right now with a successful man who finds me very sexy. Our only challenge ahead is overcoming the distance between us and enduring an LDR until we decide the next steps of our journey together.
 RB_64
Joined: 7/22/2009
Msg: 10 (view)
 
When a woman says she needs space
Posted: 4/5/2013 7:02:00 AM
Advwench,
+++++++++ my thoughts exactly.
 RB_64
Joined: 7/22/2009
Msg: 22 (view)
 
Ain't Going to Happen.... now what?
Posted: 4/4/2013 5:54:24 AM
"Most women over 50 are not looking for marriage"

Boy oh boy am I glad I am not yet fifty and I haven't joined the bitter against men and marriage club. Perhaps I am a secret member of the secret think tank......let me check my club cards. I am not anxious to rush into marriage, but if I date an amazing man who rocks my world and he asks me to marry him.............then anything is possible.

Personally, I would want to know what my bedmate is thinking regarding the outcome of the relationship. Hopefully, I would find this out prior to jumping or falling into bed together. I typically have the discussion upfront with a potential date to see if we are anywhere near the same mindset. Some women are not as outspoken as I am and don't want to rock the boat, but still want an answer to the unspoken question.

If you are sleeping with the woman, which you have already stated, then man up and open up a conversation on the topic, you don't have to blurt out anything about your set in stone intents, but allowing both of you to engage in a theoretical discussion is important. Just my humble opinion.
 RB_64
Joined: 7/22/2009
Msg: 21 (view)
 
One more thing
Posted: 4/3/2013 9:11:25 AM
You could just limited your search of profiles to those who post on the forums.......you can tell a lot about a person by reading their posts on these forums (sometimes too much). At the very least, you know the posters have opinions and many are very witty and intelligent.

Have fun with your POF journey.
 RB_64
Joined: 7/22/2009
Msg: 9 (view)
 
Well here I am
Posted: 4/2/2013 11:09:58 PM
Just a funny observation, before someone else points it out...... Don't put the words "sex" and "anal" in the same question........ Just sayin'
 RB_64
Joined: 7/22/2009
Msg: 16 (view)
 
Finally, the Bacon Condom Has Arrived
Posted: 4/1/2013 7:24:07 AM
"Rigorously tested"............imagining that step of the research process is cracking me up this morning.
 RB_64
Joined: 7/22/2009
Msg: 7 (view)
 
Is finding/having a partner really that important to you?
Posted: 4/1/2013 7:09:40 AM
Digital technology has increased the size of the pool of dating/relationship choices. We no longer have to only date locally with people referred by friends/family or met through shared activities. We have an easily accessible (24/7/365) global catalog of potential mates. The sheer number of choices increases both the length of time to decide and the difficulty of the decision. Without the globalization of the dating market, I never would have met the absolutely charming man who has engaged me in a serious relationship conversation. I haven't been in his city in 30 years and he has not yet been to my city, so our paths would never have crossed without our digital connection.
 RB_64
Joined: 7/22/2009
Msg: 8 (view)
 
How far away is too far away?
Posted: 3/30/2013 5:47:08 PM
Two hours? No big deal. Unless neither of you have a car and Greyhound doesn't come through your town.

Write her. Get to know her. Call her if she will let you. Find out if she is all that in real life as well as in her profile.

Flight time alone to see the one who interests me is over four hours........ Where there is a will, there is a way.
 Rb_64
Joined: 7/22/2009
Msg: 11 (view)
 
Woman's advice. What kind of sexy pictures do I send?
Posted: 3/29/2013 2:08:18 PM
Post 16: Bang on answer!

From my perspective it is about the build up, the tease. Start slow and offer just the hint of sexual allure, build up as she asks to see more.....where the two of you take this and how explicit it becomes can only be answered by you and her. As a woman, I find well composed artistic shots highlighting the best features of a man to be exciting.

A photo shot only of the male parts is not necessarily the best feature for all men to share..LOL!

Totally agree with keeping your face out of body shots and your body out of face shots that are sensual in nature. The same with brief video clip swapping if you two are into that......never put your face with the act.

Good luck. Have fun......no chance in catching a disease.
 RB_64
Joined: 7/22/2009
Msg: 15 (view)
 
How to handle these requests...
Posted: 3/27/2013 7:27:57 AM
Depends if I am in the mood to talk dirty.......oh wait, I never give out my phone number, so I guess that isn't going to be a happening thing with some creep.

OP, pull back.....be more selective in where you put your profile, unless you like this kind of attention.
 Rb_64
Joined: 7/22/2009
Msg: 9 (view)
 
How many times can one fall deep in love and experience true love?
Posted: 3/26/2013 11:22:55 PM
If the mind allows it the heart is flexible and can fall in love, deep love, multiple times. If the mind binds pain and loss to the heart, then it can be near impossible to love deeply multiple times. In my life, I have loved a few men - some of them very deeply, but each experience is unique in intensity, circumstance and duration. Many of them I still love despite no longer being in love with them. Interestingly, I was not deeply, head over heels in love with either of the two men I married (they pursued me and I gave into their pursuit) our circumstances/needs were closely matched which allowed us to love one another.....just not in a lasting,deeply committed for life manner.

I do believe I will fall deeply in love again as I know my heart is open and I am willing risk heartbreak to find the love I seek.
 RB_64
Joined: 7/22/2009
Msg: 19 (view)
 
Meeting at your house?
Posted: 3/26/2013 10:24:53 AM
4ms4me:

He volunteered personal information (full name, home address, etc.) that I did not request nor did I need for a meet in a public place. I have no obligation to share detailed personal information with anyone prior to a meet. I have stated this before on the forums, potential dates who have little regard/respect for their personal safety or mine are unlikely to have my six in real life.

The men I date, who tend to have military or law enforcement backgrounds, respect my personal stance. Others, such as yourself who choose to bash my personal stance in a public forum would never be in my circle of friends.
 RB_64
Joined: 7/22/2009
Msg: 9 (view)
 
Meeting at your house?
Posted: 3/26/2013 7:18:31 AM
In my world, personal safety is always a top priority. I use the following rules for any first-time meet:

Rule # 1 - never, ever give out information that allows someone to track you to your home (this may include phone #)
Rule # 2 - always meet in public - part ways in public, not at personal vehicles
Rule # 3 - leave your meet/date plans with a trusted friend (in case something goes wrong)
Rule # 4 - no matter how great the date seems - do not go to their house or your house that night

One man I was chatting with a couple years ago got royally pissed off at me because he voluntarily gave me a ton of personally identifying information and then expected me to do the same for him prior to meeting. I stopped all conversation once his underlying anger/control issue surfaced.

Your life is precious......always plan to protect it.
 Rb_64
Joined: 7/22/2009
Msg: 56 (view)
 
Is dating a widower/widow that scary?
Posted: 3/25/2013 4:12:37 PM
I'm fairly confident that Stubidooo is NOT suffering from low self esteem........is he very opinionated and confident, yes.
 Rb_64
Joined: 7/22/2009
Msg: 42 (view)
 
Being sexually honest when looking for new partner
Posted: 3/25/2013 12:10:45 PM
I absolutely will not be jumping into a sexual situation/going to bed with someone without discussing sex first. Way too risky and dangerous to do that to my physical health. Also, why would I add a new sexual partner to my history if I wasn't sure he was someone I wanted to be serious about? I totally disagree with the idea of not discussing anything until after the deed is done.
 rb_64
Joined: 7/22/2009
Msg: 6 (view)
 
Distance??
Posted: 3/25/2013 11:11:26 AM
My recommendation would be to contact the girl (or girls) in the new city and share your plans to move to their city. Even if you don't end up dating, you could find out about the area and local activities. I have been contacted by men moving into the area and by men who live in other states. As long as a man is polite in his contact, I will share information about the area and be upfront whether I am interested in further chat. Right now, I am chatting with a great guy who lives out of state. For me, distance is not a huge deal if I am really interested in the man.
 rb_64
Joined: 7/22/2009
Msg: 30 (view)
 
Being sexually honest when looking for new partner
Posted: 3/25/2013 7:15:46 AM
For me, the man would have to define the "naughties" for me to answer if I was interested. Actually, if a man spoke of sexual intimacy as the "naughties" I might end the conversation before it started as it would indicate to me that perhaps there were some hangups on his end.

Sexual intimacy between consenting adults is not naughty, bad or wrong in any of the variations that can be imagined and enjoyed between the participants. Humans are sexual creatures (even those who deny their own sexuality) so having open, honest, non-judgemental conversations about what our likes and dislikes are before facing disappointment in the heat of the moment is critical.

I want the man I will be sharing myself with to know where we can go before he unwraps the package. This requires the two of us to converse first.....and I don't mean minutes before the act. The sexual conversation is not a rapid game plan of what to do or not do. Ideally discussions on sexually intimacy unfold over time naturally and ultimately include the topic of sexually transmitted diseases.
 rb_64
Joined: 7/22/2009
Msg: 19 (view)
 
HE CANT KISS!!! for the love of God.HELP!
Posted: 3/25/2013 7:01:19 AM
If the kisses feel fantastic, but you just can't stand his sounds...........then turn on some music very loud and drown him out. When he asks why the music is so loud - tell him why his own sounds turn you off.
 RB_64
Joined: 7/22/2009
Msg: 42 (view)
 
Sex in the Weirdest Places!!
Posted: 3/24/2013 7:27:50 PM
Msg. 45. In the back of a squd car? Really? I sense a great story in that adventure.
 RB_64
Joined: 7/22/2009
Msg: 13 (view)
 
Dating Ex-Spouse
Posted: 3/24/2013 7:00:09 PM
Best of luck to you in discovering if this is a better point in your life and his life to be in a relationship.

If I ever even slightly consider dating the man I divorced 21 years ago, I sincerely hope one of my friends or family members commits me to an insane asylum.
 RB_64
Joined: 7/22/2009
Msg: 12 (view)
 
Exclusivity... after one date
Posted: 3/24/2013 6:49:34 PM
Great decision. Glad you did not get involved and find out the hard way you would never own your life again with this guy and the traits you shared.
 Rb_64
Joined: 7/22/2009
Msg: 16 (view)
 
WTH happened ( a hit and run!)
Posted: 3/24/2013 10:55:53 AM
People make mistakes. You perceived he made a huge mistake and your immediate response over it upset the proverbial apple cart of your budding relationship. In my opinion it is unlikely you can ever get this one back because of the broken trust. He trusted you not to go psycho on him, and you trusted him not to be on POF despite not discussing either (assuming based on the lack of mention of those discussions happening). Take this as a dating mistake lesson learned.

Best of luck finding and keeping what you seek.
 Rb_64
Joined: 7/22/2009
Msg: 91 (view)
 
This is from Eharmony
Posted: 3/24/2013 10:19:03 AM
I am always amazed by the mudslinging in the forums. My personal perspective is that some men I will discuss sex with and some I won't even mention it at all. Guess which men I will date? Sexual compatibility is a huge part of a relationship. Some people don't understand how critical it is to be on the same page as your mate. I would rather know sooner than later if we are compatible. This doesn't mean first date or first message.....just when we naturally take the conversation there jointly.

If a man brings up sex too early for me or in a manner am not comfortable with then I will share my feelings with him very clearly and not engage in a discussion about sex. I don't automatically cross a man off the list of potential dates simply because he chose to share his thoughts in a manner that was less than ideal for me. On the others and if I have made myself clear and the man chooses to continue the same path, then I end the conversation. Men that push a conversation about sex in an opening message to me will be declined immediately.
 RB_64
Joined: 7/22/2009
Msg: 50 (view)
 
I Chose The Wrong Guy
Posted: 3/24/2013 9:06:51 AM
OP, you are a brave woman, you took a chance and left the door of interest open. I agree with Stubidooo, you may be pleasantly surprised and be contacted by your friend later. Give it some time. Don't be afraid to say hello again in a couple weeks or longer based on your situation and comfort level. Life is unpredictable, so never say never.
 RB_64
Joined: 7/22/2009
Msg: 17 (view)
 
How long has it been?
Posted: 3/23/2013 3:45:33 PM
Some questions don't deserve answers. I don't mind discussing sex in general because I believe sexual compatibility is critical. But details? Really? When, where, who, how, why......no, not happening.
 RB_64
Joined: 7/22/2009
Msg: 25 (view)
 
I Chose The Wrong Guy
Posted: 3/23/2013 2:50:48 PM
OP, I vote for contacting him if you are interested. Decide which is more comfortable a text or a phone call. You mentioned you had recent (a week ago) contact from him, so it really isn't a text out of the blue. Keep it positive. Never apologize unless you were rude. Simply deciding between two people is not necessarily rude it is simply honest and upfront that you intend to date one person at a time. That is actually an admirable choice.

Good luck!
 RB_64
Joined: 7/22/2009
Msg: 69 (view)
 
What Would Compell You To Marry After Age 45?
Posted: 3/23/2013 2:42:21 PM
Hmmmm, I have never thought of age as a barrier or any kind of factor in a marriage decision. I would not hesitate to marry a man I fell in love with regardless of my age. I love the concept of marriage, I believe that love is still possible and that two people can make a life commitment at any age. Despite two failed marriages, I believe that marriage can work and be an amazing journey to travel. I just need to choose wisely next time. Lessons learned from past mistakes pave the way for future success.
 RB_64
Joined: 7/22/2009
Msg: 22 (view)
 
Does he really love me and does he want to commit to me???
Posted: 3/22/2013 7:24:23 AM
As others have pointed out, it would be difficult to say with any certainty whether this man loves you or not. By a conventional societal definition of love based on his actions that you shared it is obvious that he is not being respectful to you with his words and requests of you. If you are uncomfortable with his suggestions regarding sex with other people then you have to be blunt and tell him what you specifically like or do not like about his requests of you. If you remain silent on the issue, then he could presume you are okay with it. The same is true of his joking/teasing of you. Once you tell him how you feel, then the ball is in his court - he may or may not change his behavior. Only you can decide if his behavior is at an acceptable level to you that would allow you to remain with him.

From my personal perspective, I would not/ could not remain with a man who treated me the way this man treats you. There are far too many decent, kind men in the world to remain in a relationship that would drag me down.
 
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