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 Author Thread: take a look-see
Joined: 4/13/2006
Msg: 5 (view)
take a look-see
Posted: 9/19/2008 7:22:38 PM
Mr. Rule Breaker....

I would assume that you are ok with another guy checking out your stuff. Yours is not the first one I have looked over...after all you have to see what the competition is doing right?

I agree it is a little long, but hey mine is not exaclty 3 sentences either. I figure F em if they don't want to read it all. Which may very well be why I am still here..hmmm.

Dude, you ever consider stand up comedy? I actually laughed at the " ABBA in the disc man" comment twice... once for you using a discman...and of course having ABBA in it. And if it makes you feel better... YES... if I were the medic picking you up and I found out you were listening to ABBA... you would have been made fun of. Of course not right then and there, but once we left you at the ER... all bets are off.

I would say keep it as it is. It isnt your everyday every guy profile. Ever notice how EVERYONE is " Laid back, easy going, down to earth, honest, blah blah blah"? Like no shit Captain Obvious. As I say in mine... who is going to put in there " Hey I am an ***hole... wanna go on a date?"

so yea... keep it as is...and that is coming from a STRAIGHT guy ladies...single too!
Joined: 4/13/2006
Msg: 132 (view)
What is friends first?
Posted: 9/16/2008 10:33:09 PM
Well after my first post on this here topic... I see that there have been others that pretty much mimic my thoughts so i will try to keep it brief...

Though I am not opposed to making "friends" I am not on a "Dating" site to do such.
Call me Mr. Larry Littoral but when I think of a friend... I think of someone whom I have do not have an interest in dating. HENCE is why I come to a DATING site and throw a profile up.

I have a couple very close female friends whom I love dearly like family... but I would not sleep with them because I value the closeness we have and would not want to jeopardize that by "dating" them and some how finding out that we were better off as " just friends" did it once....and I refuse to allow it to happen again because I truly did lose a friend... we did agree on " just friends" in the end, but the dynamic of that friendship changed and we are no where near as close as we were before.

I know some who read the next line will take it way the wrong way.... soo... here it is...

I did not join a dating site to make "friends" as I have a lot of them already. I joined a dating site toadd another tool in the possibility of maybe finding a relationship. No I am not as extreme as some I have read from here. I do not just click off a profile and move to the next if I read "Friends first".

To me... it is simple...... because a dating friend has a completely different dynamic when compared to going out for dinner with "JUST a friend"

Might not make any sense to any of you reading it.. but it makes perfect sense in my head.
Joined: 4/13/2006
Msg: 92 (view)
What is friends first?
Posted: 9/14/2008 2:44:09 PM
I just sat and read this... and will have to put my two cents into it later.. but that my "friends" you will have to WAIT for.....LOL

My favorite lines though are

" you are a really great guy.....but...."

and of course after you have been in what you would consider a committed relationship and the other party ends it .... " we can still be friends"... LOL... more on this later.
Joined: 4/13/2006
Msg: 13 (view)
Autism and SB 3 - Stops reporting Mercury in Vaccines
Posted: 3/27/2008 8:32:57 PM
well speaking as a father of a Child whom lives with in the Autism Spectrum.. as far as his vaccinations go... I will do it again in a heart beat... you see what Polio can do to you?

those whom feel that the vaccinations are the " cause " of Autism and I am a horrible parent for putting my child at risk and all that other crap.. well... I say Thank You!..I will be a bad parent when my child is better protected from YOUR rugrat when you send it to school with the Measles, or even something a little more popular.. Chicken Pox...because you mistook it for a " simple rash"....because you think the BIG PHARMA people are out to get and hurt YOUR kid and the government is covering it all up....Dont like the government?... seems like a logical option is... MOVE to a country that does NOT have a corrupt government of some sort... oh yea thats right... there are none.... AND of course it is your right to stay here and **** and complain about how the government is. just like it is your right to refuse to have your kids immunized because of what ever reason you can think up. Sure there are all kinds of " Studies" out there as the wonderful Linda has so kindly taken up a few gigs of bandwidth to point out supporting the whole thing that immunizations are killing our kids... but there are just as many supporting the argument that immunizations are safe. Look at the WTC and Pentagon tapes... there are actually people that think that this never happened.. some of you reading this will say " yup... dat der was da government too" which is fine.. it is your right to think that. yea.. I opened that can of worms... not really...

ok anyway.. as a parent with a child whom LIVES with in the Autism spectrum.. which I may have missed that part of the postings in here mentioning that there is a VERY wide range of Autism from very low functioning almost a vegetative state... to a very high functioning almost genius like range..... did you know... Bill Gates .. Yes... THAT Bill said to have behaviors that fall with in the Autistic range? Never ' Diagnosed" but Microsoft was one of the first major U.S. corporations to offer to pay for behavior therapy for its employees' autistic children... a few other people you may or may not have heard about have been known to display Autistic traits and yet never was " diagnosed" as Autistic....
A musician from a little town in Germany.. oh what was his name... oh yea Ludwig van Beethoven
there was a guy from Ohio invented a couple things that are some what familiar to most of us... something about a light bulb.. oh.. yes Thomas Edison....he exhibited Autistic traits.
Who was that guy... you know the creator of Charlie Brown... OHHHH Charles Shulz.. there was also some lady.....a writer of sorts .....uhmmm oh yea Emily****nson... she also is said to have exhibited Autistic traits.

so.. is it the Immunizations that "cause it" or has it just been around a little longer then what we " think" I mean.. if it is fact that that music guy Beethoven had what is being described as Autistic traits.. I some how have trouble with believing the " FACT " [ as said here once or twice] that Immunizations are the cause of Autism....

Linda... we get it... Your kid has Autism... he was fine one day and the day after a shot... not so child was delayed all his life.. or so we though... so what YOU can do is sue the Pharma companies... OR... be your childs advocate get all the help you can for him and make it the best life you can with what you have....stop living in the past as it seems like you is a very big bitter pill to fully accept your child is " different" and the thinking of the " what did i do wrong... what if i did this.. or this".... i still have my days with accepting that.. but it does not change the way i love him.
Joined: 4/13/2006
Msg: 174 (view)
Ever Wonder Why Single Men Do Not like Single mothers?
Posted: 12/23/2007 12:50:25 PM

I think that most single dads would prefer to meet a single mom and vise versa. This way you can hope that the other person would understand your situation.

I am very lucky that my daughters mom is cool. We both focus on our shared daughter and thats the way it should be. When you become a parent you give up that freedom of the non-parent life. You are responsible for another life and raising this child to be a good person and great morals and values. This job is 24/7/365.

Not all, but most single people don't get this. So, the single parent is a better route to go. Plus, once you see what kind of parents they are to their own kids, you can figure out if you they would be a good role model for yours.

Still if I wasn't a parent and I met a wonderful woman with a child, I would let that stop me. Children are blessings, not curses. And above all, Love conquers all.

So as always. You need to follow your heart and instinct, but most of all. Never settle.

I am going to have to say that Sanderick speaks for more of us single fathers then what you may think.

Personally I do tend to prefer dating a single mother due to her being more adpt to understanding alot easier that things tend to change at a minutes notice and sometimes a date will have to be postponed.

I also read a post from lost_150_pounds and in there he said "Majority (not all) also seem to be scared from a decent guy who treats them and their children well and end a relationship because they do not know how to handle it." I have experienced this first hand myself and it really is sad and sucks dead skunk as s. the Lady i was dating fell into the Ex husbands "trap" and she ended up sleeping with him... to which i found this out first hand the next morning when i showed up for our day together... he was still at her place.. in her bed....yea.. talk abotu a kick in the nuts.... but anyway.. after a coupel hours her and i got together and talked and i flat out told her I forgive her.. sure i was angry and very hurt.. but hey.. given the stories i heard form her abotu how he treated her.. why would i want to be like him? her response was " Why are you being so nice to me about this?" my answer was " i could jump around and yell scream and threaten you... but what does that get me in the end besides being just like him" her response was... " at least i would know how to handle that..."

My favorite ::::sarcasm::::: is the people whom put in their profile that they have kids and that any one they date will have to accept them as a package... BUT... they will not date anyone with kids... I mean like I have to be accepting of that.. but you dont?
On line dating is difficult to begin with... .hell getting a response out of people sometimes is like pulling teeth and that is just another topic that has been beat to death here too...

so yea.... any single moms out there that live with in 25 miles of me... give or take a few miles...I would love to hear from you...

I can also see the other side of the coin... when there are children involved and the other party doesnt have any ties to the area such as have to look in the future... will you be willing to move your children away from the other parent? will you be willing to move away from your children? when i say move away.. i am talking 4 and 5 hours... or more...knowing that you will be depriving your children of the other parent?.. .even if the other parent is a sh it bag...

Hey .. Happy Holidays....
Joined: 4/13/2006
Msg: 56 (view)
Why are so many middle-age men in the online-dating-world into motorcycles?
Posted: 9/18/2007 10:17:36 PM
well.. as a 36 y/o male, not middle aged yet.. but damn close... i would have to go with the reason of... because i am 36 and i just happen to enjoy riding... and most of all.... I can. I find it relaxing and it certainly makes you VERY much more aware of bikes on the road while you are driving your 4 wheel vehicle if you ride a bike yourself. those of us who ride tend to check that blind spot more, and tend to "see" that bike before pulling out in front of it as so many "non riders" do. How many " bikers" do you see pre-occupied with their cell phone to their ear and not paying attention to the road?

I am not the Harley type.. I much prefer a nice crotch rocket as I own a 2001 Honda CBR 929RR... am I looking for my early 20s again.. ehhh who knows.. who cares... I know what I enjoy maybe someday before my crotch rocket kills me I might own a Harley but I do not see it in the near future. I can certainly look at a Harley and appreciate it for what it is and the time and money the owner puts into keeping it looking nice... but I bought my bike to ride.. not spend hours "polishing the chrome".
Joined: 4/13/2006
Msg: 59 (view)
Death Ok for Child Rapist?
Posted: 6/10/2007 8:30:35 PM
again... if my 8 y/o son tells me that someone touched him wrong.... oh and for the record... he has Aspergers.. which if you know.. is tied with Autism....but if he tells me he was touched.. I am fairly certain i will believe him....why... he is my child.....

now at this point in time....i can not say exactly what i would or would not do. how ever in my current state of mind i would feel that death is too good.... as i posted before.... make them a quadriplegic so that they have nothing from the neck down ... they are still alive... and have the memories of why they have to blow into a straw to move the wheel chair.

a simple severing of the Spinal cord between C4 and C5 or C5 and C6 should do the trick.. and if they die... ehhh...

yea yea yea.. sounds cold and heartless, which i am not...but if you do not have children... you will most likely NEVER compeletly understand the bond regardless of how many students nieces nephews or neighborhood kids you have. Also, yes.. being a survivor of a kid toucher also sometimes tends to sway your feelings one way or another.

Mr. Ocean, may i ask have you ever had to take a 4 y/o child to the hospital with sever rectal bleeding because the 29 y/o b/f of the mother decided it would be a good idea to try to put his penis into her anus?

do you think that blood in the underwear of the mothers b/f is enough to say 100% that this guy is guilty... even though he says he didnt do it but cant explain where the blood came from?

do i draw my views from emotion... yes.. partly i do.... everyone makes their decisions partly from emotion.
Joined: 4/13/2006
Msg: 40 (view)
Death Ok for Child Rapist?
Posted: 6/6/2007 10:20:33 AM
I can probably say... Though I do hope I am NEVER placed in this situation.. However as a father to an 8 y/o boy. If someone touches him inappropriately someone will be spending time in jail... that someone would most likely be me. I would like to think that I would do EVERYTHING in my power to make the person whom did anything like that to my son suffers for the rest of their life. The Justice system does work, but it also allows too many fall through the cracks only to let them do it again... and chances are they have learned from thier mistakes.. the ones that got them caught. I do not think killing them is a solution how ever spending life as a quad in a wheel chair unable to do anything other then sit there and think about what happened to lead them to life confined to a wheel chair like Christopher Reeve. .. if they happen to die... ehhh... no real loss to me except a few more years in prison... and chances are... I would be apploded by the inmates due to kid touching is NOT a very acceptable reason to be in prison. Sure society will end up paying for them for the rest of their lives however each day this person wakes up they will be reminded of what they did wrong. I would also say the same for adults whom rape adults....kind of barbaric? Yep... but what about the barbaric emotional harm tht has been done to the victim? Sure.. shrinks counseling and all that other crap can "heal" the victim, but the memory is ALWAYS there.

Sure the Bible... if you are a believer says " eye for an eye" and in the Ten Commandments it says " thou shall not kill"... as well as turn the other cheek and forgive and all that other stuff... I do not think I am that strong of a person.
Joined: 4/13/2006
Msg: 7 (view)
Why is it hard for women to Date men with kids?
Posted: 6/3/2007 12:50:33 PM
If they are not willing to accept the entire package.. then they are NOT worth your time. It is commendable that you seem to want to be a stand up father and if they are pentilizing you for that... do you really want to be with someone like that?

what I finn rather amusing are the ones whom say " you have to accept my children" but then you see that they would prefer you dont have any... so let me get this stright.. I have to take you and your children... in the mean time... you wont date somoene who has children of their own?... little uhmmm self-fish there dont ya think?
Joined: 4/13/2006
Msg: 42 (view)
Posted: 6/2/2007 4:29:54 PM
perhaps he found someone whom he seemed to be attracted to more...
Joined: 4/13/2006
Msg: 104 (view)
Why Do women dump men who are nice to them.
Posted: 6/1/2007 11:08:08 AM
I am going to have to agree with RMB_Mike on some of his statements. I am one also that really does NOT like the nice guy label. When we as guys hear the line “you are a really nice guy....." It is normally followed by "..... But....." after hearing how nice and great of a guy we are... and then hearing the "but....." X amount of times we start to wonder what the problem is that we are such great guys, however not great enough.

Sure this is some what of an insecurity and we are adults but we are adults with feelings and all that other stuff. When we date someone and hear the horror stories about how the "ex" treated them and all that and then get the line... and then find out that the next 2 3 or 4 guys treated them poorly... it does get a bit discouraging.

I know a physical attraction is a must, regardless of who says looks shouldn’t matter, I have to agree with a female poster a while back who said that it has to be there.

The sad part is that it does go both ways.

It is a proven fact that an “abused” person will likely seek out an abuser... With out "trying to” because that is what they are accustomed to. It can be referred to as a vicious cycle that will only be broken when the “abused" truly WANTS it to be broken. I am not saying by any means that every person whom throws the “nice guy/girl" term out there has been in a bad relationship all their lives.

I have personally experienced this with my last ex. She ex husband physically and mentally abused her. We started dating and she ended up going back to her ex husband even after he treated her like sh it for the past year before I got into the picture.. And all during the relationship. He still had control over her and all it took was for him to say the right things and well... She cheated on me with him and that is what ended the relationship and of course I got the “great guy" line... followed by” but he changed and we are going to see if we can work things out. Needless to say, less then 2 weeks later... his old self came back out and since then she has been involved with 2 other guys whom in her words were so much like her ex husband. When I found out she cheated { pretty much the easy way.. he was at her apt one morning when I got there... and they certainly were not having tea and crumpets} I told her I did understand why it happened and I do forgive her.. which I do... and she asked me why I am being so nice to her after what happened.... my reply was " what do I get out of getting mad and acting treating her like he did... besides being on the same level as him, I said I was much better then he is. Her reply was... “Well at least I would know how to handle that... I do not know how to handle someone being so nice"

So yes... the nice guy/girl label does feel like a curse sometimes, and i feel that it takes about 6-8 weeks if someone is just putting up a front as a "nice person" until that front starts to fall. I personally do get frustrated when I am told how wonderful and great I am... BUT....however I am just being myself and I really do not see myself changing that aspect of my personality.

LOL... I have made this long enough to bore most of you... and I will read your responses later. I have a date with a motorcycle it is too nice out not to be riding today... anyone want to go with?
Joined: 4/13/2006
Msg: 14 (view)
Nudie Bars and Lap Dances
Posted: 3/18/2007 10:59:34 PM
speaking as an idiot... because yes.. I have been to a strip joint or two in my life.... I have seen Als refferd to here... and i must make mention of the admiral dinner theater in Chicago was one of the classier and Fantisy Showbar In Cherry Hill NJ, as well as franks chicken house in Manville NJ oh... and who can forget Dinks Tavern in Williamsport PA....oh and I have also taken care of secureing " entertainment" for a few bachelor parties as well as when it is the guys only vacation. obviously I am going to say ther eis nothing wrong with strip joints and yes.. it does seem like a waste of money but on the flip side as the guy above me somewhere said alot of these ladies are putting themselves through school or paying bills after a shitty divorce, or cant find a well paying job for what ever reason. does it make them less of a person because they just happen to take their clothes off and get paid for it?

The only other place i have heard of a mans "unit" refered to as " junk" is the Opie and Anthony show... Artsy... are you a fan of the show?
Joined: 4/13/2006
Msg: 94 (view)
UCLA student tasered for not showing ID...Video
Posted: 11/21/2006 2:48:26 PM

Ouch!!! I would've kept that part for myself if I was you. It certainly says a lot doesn't it?

That is i guess the difference between you and I.

Do tell why you would have kept that to yourself?

What exactly is it saying?

I .. like you and others here are simply stateing our opinions.... YOU on the other hand went on to basicaly say that since I do not agree with your opinion i was narrow minded. so what i take out of that is anyone that does not agree with the way YOU view things that they are narrow minded?

Did you by chance google Affirmative Action? i know that when you do and read about it.. you would most likely not say that it does profile individuals.

Toonsmith... yes.. cellphone tech did play a role here.... but again... where is the part that happened BEFORE the video.. no one cares about that... what events actually lead up to where you see the video start? that is where the he said/ she did comes into play and obviously very few seem to be thinking about.
Joined: 4/13/2006
Msg: 81 (view)
UCLA student tasered for not showing ID...Video
Posted: 11/21/2006 9:28:13 AM
Cav... hate to break the news to you... you and I ARE a minority.

you dont think you and I as Caucasion males are not already profiled?
Have you ever attempted to get a civil service job? What do you think Affirmative Action is? do a google search ...

i find it slightly amusing that everyone wants to hack apart the police and America and then say " hey... the constitution says i can" and you are right.. it does provide Freedom of Speech, at what cost did it come though? I have seen the video... of course i would enjoy seeing the first 15 or so minutes BEFORE the video started....see the camera does catch alot.. but normaly it is what happens BEFORE the camera is turned on no one wants to think about. How many times did the security politly ask the kid for id BEFORE the video started? how many times did they ask him to leave BEFORE the video started? what was said BEFORE the video started? what did this compleatly innocent upstanding youngman do BEFORE the video started?

was anyone of us posting here actually in the room as it was happening....didnt think so...

Narrow-mindedness? LOL... i have been called much worse by far better, and so i do not see things YOUR way.. I am narrow-minded....You are correct.. i wouldnt put myself in the situation as this kid.. why.. because i personaly would have just said, oh sh1t, i dont have my ID... they are chcking.. i need to get moving and NOT argue with them..BEFORE they got over to me.... OR knowing I would need the ID while i was there.. i would have made damn sure i had it... i guess it is called somethgin like responsibility

And i do know what a taser can do...i was on the receiving end yep.. i know how it feels...

you mention terrorists.... i do not recall.. but what does one actually look like?

Montreal guy......tasers are most certainly alot more clean then a GSW.
Joined: 4/13/2006
Msg: 71 (view)
UCLA student tasered for not showing ID...Video
Posted: 11/21/2006 7:17:55 AM
Ok... so the guy got a few thousand volts in him... and after all the one poster said he was complying AFTER A FEW MINUTES! What was the problem with the fu ck knuckle saying “oh shit...? You know what... I do not have my id... I KNOW I am supposed to have it because the SCHOOL SAYS SO and that is part of the deal for me going to UCLA. I will leave right now.
Nope... he has to make a scene... he has to MAKE it Racial profiling... which ... I am not opposed to....If it keeps me safer... then so be it.

Those whom think America is so bad and horrible and all the other crap... heres an idea... MOVE OUT. Move on over to Iraq.... I have heard Ramadi is great this time of year for Americans, or perhaps you could move to North Korea... heard the local laws there are pretty friendly. It seems like there are a few here that would pretty much enjoy a lawless state.. So how about you all just jump ship here and head on down to Cuba...

Did he NEED tazed 5 or 6 times, sure...why not....he was given AMPLE opportunity to just leave, sure you can express your dislike of being touched.. But at the point of being asked to leave the FIRST TIME. And you do not... you are then Trespassing.
Any one wants to bet it he forgets his ID again?
Joined: 4/13/2006
Msg: 109 (view)
Do you ever miss being hugged?
Posted: 11/20/2006 8:56:07 PM
Hey yea.. thanks for reminding me how much i do miss it.. a nice warm tight hug nothing needing to be said.. the hug says it answer is:

Joined: 4/13/2006
Msg: 6 (view)
UCLA student tasered for not showing ID...Video
Posted: 11/18/2006 11:04:01 AM
Where is the video from the time the " innocent student using his constitutional rights" walked into the Library? of course that is no where to be found right?
Joined: 4/13/2006
Msg: 1 (view)
Might as well Jump on the band wagon.....
Posted: 10/9/2006 12:38:34 PM
So here I was reading and figured I would throw myself under the bus.
Ladies... and Gents..... please review my profile.
Joined: 4/13/2006
Msg: 22 (view)
Pennsylvania, Amish school shooter targeted girls, (police)
Posted: 10/4/2006 11:30:33 AM
Yna6, you are right.... there are " specials" being put together by the media outlets and " experts" on the amish comeing from everywhere... i have lived in Lancaster County for the last 30 years and these peopel are my " neighbors" and i am by far no where near and expert. How does someone who has lived in New York or califonia become and expert on a group of people when peopel whom lived here all their lives do not know everythign about them? i just know they wish to be left alone, and another poster said it right.. if they want help.. they will ask for it.. they are a private group and place ALOT of faith in God.

And yes.. when the wife found the notes.. she did call the police.
there is no excuse for exicuting a 7 y/o child....there is a relgious group from i think Kansas going to be picketing the funerals of the children because they say " this is Gods punishment for......."

Joined: 4/13/2006
Msg: 12 (view)
Pennsylvania, Amish school shooter targeted girls, (police)
Posted: 10/3/2006 10:05:44 AM
I do not think anyone here has no sympathy for his children. i have not read anythign here directed to his kids.

It is by HIS choice he brought the suffering that his widow and children are going to be suffering for YEARS to come. His children will face teaseing and lonelyness due to other kids not wanting to be friends with them because of thier father and what he had done.

he simply had the choice to go off into a feild and off himself... his choice was to hurt a 6 y/o little amish girl and 10 of her classmates... 6 years old....

no one is saying they hate his kids... his kids have nothign to do with this.... the children he shot and killed had NOTHING to do with his " grudge" from 20 years ago.....why.. well i belive the oldest he shot was 15.. she wasnt alive then.... he made the plans to do this in his head.... he made the choice... not his one has said his kids are to blame or they have no sympathy for them.
Joined: 4/13/2006
Msg: 9 (view)
Pennsylvania, Amish school shooter targeted girls, (police)
Posted: 10/2/2006 7:36:14 PM
No one will truely know exactly what snapped in his mind. that is something that he has taken to his grave.
Joined: 4/13/2006
Msg: 6 (view)
Pennsylvania, Amish school shooter targeted girls, (police)
Posted: 10/2/2006 4:21:39 PM

Given i live in the area, Yes they know that monsters like this exsist... but i am sure they never thought they would ever meet one.

they are sheilded very much by the parents from the " english" ways. but sometimes in cases like this....there is no way to shield them.
Joined: 4/13/2006
Msg: 3 (view)
Pennsylvania, Amish school shooter targeted girls, (police)
Posted: 10/2/2006 2:58:44 PM
about 10 years ago i worked EMS in that area.I know exactly where that school is and have driven by it with out paying mind to it. i still live in lancaster county and heard the initial dispatches go on the radio. i personaly know a number of the responders whom were called to that scene. to read here that we made the news in Canada, is upsettign exspecialy given the topic. I do ask that all that read here keep not only the victims, the shooters family, as well as the responders in thier mind.

there are going to be answers that will never be known such as why did he target only females? what did an 8 y/o little amish girl do to deserve to be gunned down while her feet are tied together by wire ties? the shooter also had 3 children, can yo imagine what mental help these kids are going to need for years to come? we all know children are ruthless and these kid will face ridicule and teasing form thier class mates for more then likely the rest of thier school lives.

Google Amish and Lancaster County and read about them, it is amazing how they live. when the whole Y2K thing was the buzz.. i would assume that if the world stopped around them, they would be affected very little that si how simple they live.

Joined: 4/13/2006
Msg: 91 (view)
W H Y? All opinions appreciated x
Posted: 9/25/2006 6:35:50 PM
well my analysis is.... i am not a shrink....and i dont play one on the internet.. i am just baseing my thgouhts on how i was rasied and through going to a shrink my self { by my own choice} to figure out why my marriage failed and make sure that the next relationship i am in i do not repeat the same mistakes.

typicaly people will be the kind of person that they grew up with. the human being will emulate what they were shown as a child alot of times unless they make a choice NOT to do so such as myself. i CHOOSE NOT to be like my abusive stepdad and my sperm donor of a " father" because i know in my heart and mind that what they did to my mother my sister and myself that it was not right. i have more repsect ofr females then that.. hell i have more respect for myself then that.

but as the lady below me here said.. what is / was it abotu this relationship that makes / made you feel like you needed it? it sounds like you had a pretty decent mother and father so that isnt it. i would say that prehaps the other jack as s whom abused you may have somethign to do with it. they say that some peopel reach a point where negitive attention in a relationship is better then no attention at all so they accept it and live with it eventually takeing it as " normal" such as the last lady i dated... she did not know how to handle the " nice guy" so when the abusive " husband " shows up and what not.. she is used ot that and knwos what to do with it.

i am not a shrink... but i would recommend you maybe seeing one jsut to help find out what is goign on with in yourself that makes you feel the way you do.

I do not know how domestic violence is handled in England.... but here in the states that guy that you dated that did that stuff to you.. may have received a "trip" down a few flights of steps at the police station " accidently" of course.
Joined: 4/13/2006
Msg: 51 (view)
Why are there so many married men pretending to be seperated?
Posted: 9/25/2006 12:55:25 PM
and yet another " seperated " thread.....and of course i have to post because i am one of " those" guys that are seperated.

so this seems to be a popular topic.. the " seperated guy" topic....just for the record I AM SEPERATED have been for 3 years now. in fact i just got back from my divorce attorny.. $500 poorer.. and that is just the retainer... doesnt cover the 2 hours we sat together today goign over the papers my " wife" filed.

now as soon as many of you whom would not date me or click off my profile when they see " seperated" will sit here and say " because you are seperated you will think that it is ok." and well you are partly right. now to the ladies whom say " well the seperated guy can work it out and then i am left hurt blah blah blah blah" allow me to present a case.. oh wait... make that 2 cases to you....

the last 2 females i met online both seperated.. and guess what... BOTH ENDED UP GOING BACK TO THIER HUSBAND... uht oh.. what did i jsut say.. nahhh it couldnt be....

and the last one.. well she went back to a husband that PHYSICALY ABUSED HER. so enough of the man bashing when this topic comes up.... men AND women both are guilty of it and i would have to say it is pretty darn equal.

and being actually divorced for X amount of time before dateing.... ehh get over yourself what does that prove? again.. there is just as much chance of workign it out even after a divorce. you going ot mark it on your calender when i get my final papers? and let me know when i am " dateable" again?

i saw mention of yea... they do back ground checks.. i do know a person who is on there.. you know what they say.. is no different then ANY other site... same kind of people... same B/S as any other site. all the sites are the same... just different look and priceing... and sometimes the same people on a couple different sites.....

now i took a phone call and forget where i was rollign with this.. so i am goign to make liek a baby and head out... with out even doign spell/ grammer check... cause i just dont feel like it.....
Joined: 4/13/2006
Msg: 142 (view)
first date from hell
Posted: 9/25/2006 12:21:36 PM
oh man.. i am goign to get hacked to peices fo rthis i think but here goes.....

my very first date after i became separated 3 years ago....met on another site... got a long well online.. phone decided to meet for dinner...

met..went to the place for dinner, and she asks me to tell her about my pending divorce.. { i am a kind of person i will talk abotu pretty much anything.. just make sure you really want the answer before you ask the question....s} so anyway...i tell her a little bit and she interupts me with.. " well she sounds like a f ucking bi tch" i politly said that no, she isnt .. it just fell apart because we let it go and before we knew it.. it was gone...a few minutes later she says it again.. i again politly say to her, well you knwo .. you havent even a clue as to what her name is, and you have never met her. i do not say that about her.. and i would appriciate it if you didnt either."

food comes.. i am 2 bites into a great steak and AGAIN she makes refernce to my ex wife as to being a ****.... i put my fork and knife down... stood up and said listen this isnt going to work out you enjoy your dinner on me and feel free to enjoy mine as well" and simply walked away went to the waiter and handed him enough to cover the bill and tip and walked out of the resturant and left... she had about a mile walk to get to her car. wonder why i havent heard from her?

and of course my second date didnt go so well either.... but that was more of a oral hygene issue.. i dont think she knew what a dentist was...

met at her place... NASTY NASTY teeth and breath... and out of pure couriosity had to " go to the potty" and didnt find any thing in there that even could have been used as tooth brush or tooth paste....
Joined: 4/13/2006
Msg: 79 (view)
W H Y? All opinions appreciated x
Posted: 9/25/2006 11:51:54 AM
Solo, wow... sounds like you just got lucky.... why lucky.. well because do you think you could live with that kind of relationship for the rest of your life?... didint think so.

now i pose a very personal question to you and you may choose to answer it here, by email or simply say none of my bussiness....but hey.. i am not known for being too tactful and i am known for just laying it out as it comes to my mind.

what was your childhood like? what kind of relationship did you see between your mother and father? was your father distant to your mother? have you ever felt you have been in an abusive relationship before? how did your mother and father handle conflict? a few BIG red flags here to me are the obvious and i am sure they have been pointed out to you .. i did not take the time to read ALL of the posts.. but here are a few that jump out at me and SCREAM run away

".....selfish person (some of the time) & I guess a bit of a control freak!!!"

everyone is a little bit selfish at tiems.. not a real biggie.. but if you took the time to write it... it is more then some of the time and the control freak comment...well it starts small and ends up big.

"We were invited to one of my friends BBQs, he didn't want to go & told me I couldn't choose a burger over him and it was his way or no way."

ANYONE who says "my way... or no way" isnt a bit of a controll freak... this is full on...

"If I ever said anything he didn't agree with he used to tell me I was in need of psyciatric help."

he WAS trying to give your opinon to you.. again.. CONTROL issue...and based on the next qoute i post.. sounds liek he has issues from his childhood that he needs to address with a shrink

"He would never want to talk any problems thru & if I tried he would tell me to f**k off and constantly put the phone down. "

the F uck off part right here really grains me. This guy has NO respect for you.. which should be obvious.

and to answer this " why would I want to be with him anyway "

perhaps this ties into past relationships, and what you were exposed to as a child.

if this is the case only YOU can stop the cycle. I dated a wonderful lady whom came from an abusive marraige and as a child she was exposed to a not so happy marraige betwene her mother and father. so in her mind some how this is what is " normal" she often asked me " why do you treat me so nice... i dont deserve it" and other stuff like that which i wont type out here to bore the rest of the posters.... well her abusive ex husband enters the picture again... says all the right things " i love you , i miss you, i am sorry, i have CHANGED, lets work it out for our son, blah blah blah... and guess who is on the outside looking single again?... well that woudl be me. what do i credit this to... because this is what she in her mind thinks is " normal" this is what she is used to. she even told me when i found out she was " with " her husband. and i flat out told her that though i am very hurt by it... i understand.. and i am willing to fogive her. her reply is " but why are you so nice to me... i do not know how to take this." i said because it gains me nothing to treat you like he did.. and will contiue to do once the newness wears off againin a couple weeks" she said " but atleast i know how to take that.... i am used to it and can deal with that alot better then niceness".. kinda wierd huh? it is a pattern that only YOU can break YOu have to make sure you know and understand that YOU do deserve to be treated nicely by someone whom respects you.

Joined: 4/13/2006
Msg: 116 (view)
Autism Parents
Posted: 9/24/2006 10:34:35 PM
hey folks, i have a 7 y/o little boy whom was diagnosed with PDD and Aspergers with a hint of ADD. i would like to share my story but it will have to wait untill i sleep becasue it is 1:30am and i am tired. but had to " mark" this forumas one i needed to get back to.
Joined: 4/13/2006
Msg: 31 (view)
Honesty is a bad thing?
Posted: 9/22/2006 4:44:43 PM
hmmm.. i try my absolute best to be as honest as i can. I do belvie there is too honest to a point. BUT ther eis no reason not to be honest. I personally prefer to be flat out told " hey thanks for the email, but i am not interested" i dont need a reason.. jsut be HONEST with me if i contact you with interest. as i have posted before No thanks.. click send... and that is all it takes.. i may reply back with " hey thanks for letting me know, good luck with your search" and chances are, that will be the last communication we ever have.

as far as " tell it like it is" if you can honestly tell someoen exactly how you feel or if you do not liek someone, in my opinion that is telling it like it is, basicly a catch phrase. the real difference is actually not only putitng it in your profile... but following through with it. it is nothing to type it... but how many actually DO it? not many that i have tried to contact. even the ones who put in " i am bluntly honest" to me, bluntly honest IS replying to an email " NO i am not interested."
Joined: 4/13/2006
Msg: 49 (view)
What Will A woman respond to??????
Posted: 9/10/2006 11:02:05 AM

By her NOT responding she already has wasted our time. It all boils down to COMMUNICATION. and if she is not attracted to the picture then it takes how long to type out " sorry i am not interested" and click send?
Joined: 4/13/2006
Msg: 34 (view)
What Will A woman respond to??????
Posted: 9/2/2006 9:34:25 PM
phillygeek.... you are saying what 95% of us "average" males are thinking.

but this does cross the gender lines as well as others have said.
Joined: 4/13/2006
Msg: 10 (view)
For those who don't have pictures...why?
Posted: 9/2/2006 7:49:53 AM
I have mine posted... i have also tried with out it being posted, i receive just about the same amount of interest. I dont think i am a GQ model by any mean nor do i think i am some troll under a bridge. at first it was the " oh my god what if someone i know sees it" then i figured Fck em if they see it.

as far as gettign responses from those i send email to, that is a whole other topic in itself. and i am not about to retype my thoguths on that. just click on my name and check out my recent postings.

there are some people whom have careers that posting a picture here could be bad, example, police officers.
Joined: 4/13/2006
Msg: 6 (view)
when all else fails
Posted: 9/1/2006 7:06:34 PM
from one guy to another... I have to agree with wullis.

ladies will pick up on spelling and grammar errors solution - when you finish with your profile copy and paste it into word or other word processing program and run spell and grammar check on it.

pictures: nice to have pictures of you doing what you enjoy, but YOU need to be the main attraction in the picture.

as wullis said, there isn’t a whole lot about YOU in your about me. what are your hobbies? how do you like to spend your off time? what are three things that make you attracted to someone? do as wullis suggested and check out other males profiles. I did and still do just to keep up with the “competition" so to speak. you don’t think the ladies here don’t check out other ladies profiles? LOL.....

seems like you are a decent guy, just need to find a way to get that typed out into words. god knows I actually emailed my profile to a couple of my female friends that I knew would be bluntly honest with me. there is no shame in on line dating, just another avenue to possibly meet the right one.
Joined: 4/13/2006
Msg: 24 (view)
What Will A woman respond to??????
Posted: 9/1/2006 5:56:08 PM
I have wondered that myself quit a bit in the beginning, but you have to just let it go and realize that though their profile may contain all the " key words" such as " honest { or any form there of}, communication, down to earth, open, etc etc, most may not exactly know what all those words truly mean. Therefore when you email them and they do not like you for what ever reason, it is their way of saying they are not interested as Icorset has said. BUT how HONEST are they really if they can't COMMUNICATE to you that they are not interested by sending you a simple reply?

Icorset said it herself that it is their way of being "more polite" than just being honest and saying” Thanks for the email, but I am just not interested, good luck!" I personally and I am sure a lot of others find much more insulting, rude and impolite then typing something that takes barely 5 - 10 seconds and clicking send. In my opinion it simply shows what kind of person they truly are. which quoted here is a good example of what I mean

..... you wonder why we don't is because we feel "not responding" is more polite than saying, "you look goofy in your pictures" or "I'm a successful professional woman, and I'm not interested in dating a thirty-nine year old "student".

There is no need to be nasty or degrading when saying you are not interested in someone. A simple "I'm not interested" would be just fine for 99% of people. By doing so, you really are showing your true self. for someone to even post that seems to show what kind of person she more then likely is inside, which really takes away from the outer beauty.

Funemerald :
I do agree with your post about not needing money. I do know that a good number of ladies find confidence and a nice personality very attractive, However... you can look in this thread alone and see what I mean by some are very much about materialistic items. and it isn’t only Women, men do it too.

genuinegoddess: good post!
Joined: 4/13/2006
Msg: 536 (view)
Is separated single?
Posted: 4/28/2006 11:28:44 AM
mjr150 wrote:
A simple way to answer that question is to ask the person your dating to meet their family and friends. If he/she has to keep you secret, then they are not single

I would have to say .. why didnt i think of posting that? I will introduce anyone i am dateing to my " wife". it may be a bit on the awkward side but .. then there is no doubt about the separation.
Joined: 4/13/2006
Msg: 200 (view)
Why are you single?
Posted: 4/28/2006 7:44:27 AM
because the last " lady" i was dating decided to find someone who was a " better fit" for her... only problem was she forgot to tell me untill i found his car in her driveway one morning while i was going to leave a little love note on her car at 5am while i was on my way to work....and being the house was dark....i am sure he wasnt there selling girl scout cookies.
and by better fit i mean his wallett fit her needs more then mine... a story i will have to post in another thread when i have time.....
Joined: 4/13/2006
Msg: 19 (view)
Why do I feel like this??
Posted: 4/27/2006 11:41:57 AM
Confuzed..... as a man.. that would be me... i would have to say this.....DUMP HIS SORRY ASS AND MOVE ON!

step one: report this to the police tell them that you fear for your saftey and your childs safety... next time he sees YOUR child maybe the last time you see the child, happens ALL the time. I would also venture to guess that he has hit you in the past and said it wasnt his fault .. that you made him do it... or atleast threatened you with violence....also .. seek professional shrink to help you deal with the mental and possibly physical abuse you have been subjected to.

step two: restraining professional shrink to help you deal with the mental and possibly physical abuse you have been subjected to.

Step three: domestic relations, file for support, and make a visitation scheadule that includes supervised visits. seek professional shrink to help you deal with the mental and possibly physical abuse you have been subjected to.

Step four: though you THINK you love him, are you IN LOVE with him. there is a HUGE difference. I can say i love my soon to be EX WIFE, but i am NOT INLOVE with her. i love her because she is the mother of my son and i respect her because of the same. but i am NOT in love with her. You THINK you love this dirt bag, but cut all unneeded ties with him and move on. seek professional shrink to help you deal with the mental and possibly physical abuse you have been subjected to.

I have a question that is very personal in nature and you do nto have to answer it here....
Were you abused as a child? what was your father or father figure like while you were growing up? Did you have a father figure?

My shrink... yes.. i goto a shrink once a month not because i have to .. but because i want to so that i can make sure i am not goign down the path that i was raised and understand more about why i am the way i am and understand more about what my childhood was like... but any way she ha told me that those who were abused as a child most times... NOT always seek out that same kind of treatment i thier adult lives because that is what they view as " normal". You dont have to put up with the mental ups and downs from this jack off...

right now he has you where he wants you.. under his thumb and he is in controll of you if you like it or not. or if you know it or not. he has control of you and your life. only YOU can change that.
Joined: 4/13/2006
Msg: 20 (view)
How true that is but if you dont think highly of yourself whp will
Posted: 4/26/2006 8:54:22 PM
Blondedevil... no i dont want Pam Anderson.. she got the Hep-C.. plus.. she is kinda nasty dirty.... and not nasty dirty good... and further more.. have you ever seen the size of Tommy Lees Junk....i would need a large tug boat to make sure i didnt fall in

FireStarter: I am with you i have been doign the online thing for about a year and have met 6 and went out with only 2 of them more then 3 times, and one we dated for a few months....i do not think i am a bad looking guy....and i think my profile is not too bad.... send out email.. and never get a response... very frustraiting exspcially when the person is lookign for " Honesty and Communication" but they cant be honest and communicate to me they are not intereested by typing out " No thanks"?
Joined: 4/13/2006
Msg: 525 (view)
Is separated single?
Posted: 4/26/2006 1:15:53 PM
THANK YOU Beaches.....that post was great. Some of us have kids and CANNOT cut all communication with the former spouse to be, and there are some of us who refuse to allow the end of a marraige affect our children and therefore make sacrifices and try their best to maintain a friendly relationship because believe it or not to all you anti-spearated people... THE ONLY PERSON WHO SUFFERS IN THE END IS THE CHILDREN. say what you will about those of us who are separated, but again you may very well be passing up the one who could really make you the happiest.. so whos loss is it really?
Joined: 4/13/2006
Msg: 7 (view)
True or False, Men turn pages. Women close books.
Posted: 4/26/2006 11:30:10 AM
Great thread.....i will certainly elaborate more on this... but some women cant decide if they want to turn a page, open a new book, or go to the library and get another one. case in point is a woman i met on on another site.....boy what a story i have to share with you people about that.
Joined: 4/13/2006
Msg: 28 (view)
To tell or not to tell?
Posted: 4/24/2006 9:46:25 AM
I tell.... but i am thinking i might try what 7 times has suggested.. or somethign along those lines.....but some of my "friends" might actually take it serious... which then again i would know who can keep a secret and who cant if i simply say we... i will tell you but please dont tell anyone yet..blah bla blah....and then just sit back and wait to see how long it takes to get the story to come back to me and then see what has been added....

But yes i do tell. " hey i met this lady on line.." and in the even t is does turn out to be long term or marraig.. then it was well worth it.. because if it wasnt for meeting on line.. you may still be searching.
Joined: 4/13/2006
Msg: 523 (view)
Is separated single?
Posted: 4/23/2006 11:00:10 PM
you know what i have learned from all of this.......

I need to move to the Ontario area... there are some very very beautiful SINGLE.. { Included in that SINGLE word are thsoe women whom are SEPARATED} women liveing up there.

Any of you SINGLE woman wanna date a firefighter if i move up there?
Joined: 4/13/2006
Msg: 510 (view)
Is separated single?
Posted: 4/20/2006 10:28:39 PM
well horselady.. perhaps they were in a very commited long term relationship and it was like being married to them. and well.... oh heck i dont know...i just thought maybe i could compleat a sentance at 1:30 in the mornign while being way to tired to ebe on here....
Joined: 4/13/2006
Msg: 506 (view)
Is separated single?
Posted: 4/20/2006 11:52:54 AM
Lots of different opinions here and I would say that those of us that are "separated" and those of us that are divorced see things differently because of our " label".

Teu, I would like to put this out there, basically an answer to each of your things you listed

1] My " wife" KNOWS I am looking to date, she supports it and encourages it. and if you really want to know if she knows... I would gladly have you give her a call to verify to settle any unanswered questions of if she knows or not. We have been separated for 2.5 years and have not filed due to me wanting her to succeed in her education and move form an LPN to an RN.. Which in my mind will only benefit our son’s future. Now if someone cannot understand what I am getting at and understand that it will have a direct impact on my son’s well being in the long run.. Well sorry about their luck! She is done with her school the first week of May and we are BOTH planning on going to the courthouse to fill out the papers together the week after she graduates as an RN. Some cal lit being too nice.. I call it looking out for my son’s future and doing what I feel is right. others just get p issed off because they didn’t have a " peaceful divorce and they made it much harder then what it really needs to be.

2] I am only using this in my case... chances are not even there that her and I will reconcile... we both agree that we just are not for each other. she is a very shy person.. I on the other hand am not. we were raised to completely different ways and have to completely different family back grounds. does it matter. yes and no.... her parents are still together after 38 years.. my mother has been married 4 times now...using a line my shrink told me { yes.. I do see a shrink once in a while, I can admit that sometimes.. you just need someone to talk to that has no biased opinion what so ever.. does that make me updateable too?} .. but my shrink told me that I know all of the WRONG things to do in a marraiage ..but I never had a positive male role model in my life to show me the RIGHT things to do in a marriage...make any sense?

3] as far as being no ones second best.... well I am not sure if you would be wiling to be second to my son.. but that is I have told the last person I dated who did not have kids .. but was only separated and she was concerned that I was only separated....said that I might go back with my wife.. and got a bit p issed when I pointed out that she was only separated herself .. completely different story in itself....but she had no kids of her own.... told me that she wanted to be THE priority n someone’s life... and when I told her that it was impossible ..because my 7 y/o boy has that spot... but there is enough room in my heart for both of them....well... let just say I am single now....if you are not willing to share my heart with a 7 y/o.. perhaps you are being a bit selfish? now when I say YOU I do not mean YOU personally,,, but rather.. anyone.

4] is it possible that neither party "did" anything? it just happened? people do fall out of love and people do just drift apart and it isn’t any one thing or another.. it just happens? myself.. I can admit to where I went wrong.. my fault is that I was hearing her but wasn’t listening... which I didn’t even know I was doing until it was over.... I have learned a lot about myself in the last 2.5 years and know now that it is very important to communicate.. even if it is something that I feel is insignificant... maybe my partner just wants to hear me tell them about my day.... you know at work.. it may be a slow day.. and though I don’t think she wants to hear about the Automatic fire alarm we ran...because it was someone taking a shower and the steam got into the detector...if she asks if anything happened at work.. she really wants to hear about my day and I should not say " nothing". personally I do not find it interesting.. but perhaps she just wants to bond with me for a minute and that is it. that is where I went wrong.. now I am more aware of it and I know it will not happen again... so because I let it happen once and it ended my marraige ... does this mean it WILL happen again and therefore makes me " updateable?

I believe I have said it before in this thread that I can freely admit to my flaws and past mistakes...EVERYONE here has some kind of flaw.. something about them that makes them " un perfect" because honestly... if everyone here was.. well.. we wouldn’t need dating sites such as this... so why don’t we all take a step back and evaluate WHY WE are all here. those who sit and say " well it wasn’t my fault" or well I did nothing wrong" or anything along those lines....I say GUILTY.. EVERYONE has a flaw with in them that others would consider them " updateable" whether you want to admit it or not.
does it make me a bad person because I am labeled as separated? as was said before... you may very well be passing up the one you are really looking for because of a label and you are not willing to hear or see the person for anything other then the label YOU place on them are below your “ standards” I ask.. how do you know they are below your standards if you immediately shut them out just because they are separated and YOU don’t even want to hear the story.. How much are you really an open and honest communicator?
Joined: 4/13/2006
Msg: 471 (view)
Is separated single?
Posted: 4/13/2006 3:12:36 PM
I have been separated and living in a different residence since Aug. of 2003. She had JUST started to further her education to move from an LPN to RN. We took a year to go to counseling and try to see if we can save it... after a year... we were talking at the house and basically in a very casual conversation to divorce because neither of us felt that in the past year we hadn’t made any progress. We discussed a lot over the next few weeks. And getting back together was not one of them. We have a child, house and lots of other issues to work out.
Now remember I had said that she had just started to further her education to become and RN. I decided... and when I say I mean ME, that if she did not complete her RN schooling that it would have a DIRECT impact on my Childs life. So I told her that I would not be looking to file until AFTER she is completely done with school and had taken her board tests. so now fast forward to current date... she is done with school next month, and she has spoken to her attorney and I have an appointment at 9:30 on Monday and we have talked about who gets what and have spent the last 2 years ironing out as much as we can between US with out having to pay someone else.. Oh and get this....we are actually friendly... and laugh and even tell jokes to each other... imagine that... a friendly divorce... we both agree that the ONLY person to get really hurt if it is any other way would be our son. We BOTH know that there is ZERO chance of reconciliation. It is nothing that one person had done more then the other... we both agrees that the communication breakdown is what started it all....and it snowballed from there. I have seen comments about reflecting on where it went wrong... and I have done that... and I have actually been to a shrink about it to make sure I understood where “I " went wrong. and I have learned a lot about myself over the last 2+ years and will carry that over into my next am I wrong for wanting my {ex}-wife to succeed? Is it wrong to not make her "worry about” a divorce while she is in school... though yes she was thinking about it and we talked about it... but in a way it was less pressure on her while trying to succeed. Sure I could have been divorced in a matter of months... but I like to think I am a better person for not MAKEING her do it while she was in school... I like to think of it as respect... I still respect her... I still want her to succeed...and I am still proud of her accomplishments..... But I am NOT in love with her.... and she is not IN LOVE with me.
Does any one know anyone that was divorced and got remarried after a few years? Oh wait. That can’t possibly happen can it? The whole thing of " well you can always work it out if you are separated is just a security issue, you have the choice to get over it and sometimes get over yourself. or actually listen to the other person and then make a judgment based upon what you hear from them... hell I even encourage you to talk to my {ex}wife so that she can tell you as well where her and I are. Let me dial the number for you. I know that not all males are honest... but how many females are just as bad? This has been pointed out many times... but it is true.

Floky, you said it doesn’t take years for a divorce... maybe not, but perhaps if you open your eyes and see that there are people that can work a majority of the issues out between themselves and keep their word when promises are made... such as in my can take that long. So am I a bad person for doing it this way? I don’t think so. Could I have filed right away and 90 days later have a little piece of paper tell me something that I already know? I could have.... but I didn’t because I gave someone my word... and that person is the mother of my child and I want my child to respect me and the way we did things. People ask me if I am happy that I am soon going to be divorced... I say no... What is there to be happy about? A failed marriage? I wouldnt describe it as happy... I am over it ....but not happy about being another divorce statistic.

Is separated single... no it isn’t... but it certainly is a double standard when it comes to women and men. Just like the child issue... I have seen many profiles between here and the pay dating site I belong to that the female has kids and does not want anyone with kids of their own.. But insist that the guy must accept her kids as part of the package deal. bit that is a whole different issue alone.
Joined: 4/13/2006
Msg: 29 (view)
AUTISM..... Tell me anything!!!!!
Posted: 4/13/2006 1:19:41 PM
realizing i am way new to the board, but i have a 7 y/o boy that was diagnosed with Aspergers as well. first and foremost make sure you KNOW that YOU are THE ONLY TRUE ADVOCATE YOUR CHILD HAS. so much of what i ahve read is like deja vue to me. He is a great kid.. well behaved but has times where he just has a melt down. Normaly it will be when there is ALOT of activity goign on around him, that is loud. even jsut loud noises are enough to set the wheels in motion. he gets bored very quickly and when he is bored, that also set the wheels in motion.

Like everyone else... i have read alot on this and i still feel so lost when it comes to figureing out what exactly is going on. the school district has been absolutly wonderfull in accomidating him, they even went as far to giveing him a
" para-teacher" to be with him and keep him on task while in school. he is in regular 1st grade, but like alot of other kids he goes to speach.

i am so far very much enjoying this site as a whole.. so much other information then jsut " dateing"
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