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 Author Thread: He filmed us on a secret webcam... what can i do?
 Phil_McCracken
Joined: 11/18/2009
Msg: 106 (view)
 
He filmed us on a secret webcam... what can i do?
Posted: 2/19/2012 9:15:55 PM
IgorFrankensteen said:


Here in the U.S., one must grant consent for recordings. If you didn't sign a release, or give consent in some other recorded fashion, it would be his word against yours that you gave consent, and last I heard, he would have to prove you DID give consent, or be subject to prosecution. But that's here, not where you are.


I think that the states laws trump the general Federal one here in the US. I live in Illinois and though this is a "two party consent" state (one of only 6 in the U.S. where BOTH parties have to consent to the audio portion of the videotaping) secret videotaping is actually still legal, if you are the property owner of the property. This allows businesses, governments to record you, but (at least in Illinois) you can record guests in the privacy of your own house, where there is no expectation of privacy (for them). They can NOT record you under your roof, because that is a violation of your expectation of privacy in your house.

So to some this up, if this occurred in Illinois, he owned the house (condo/townhouse/trailer) he would be protected by Illinois law to record her (she has no reasonable expectation of privacy in his house), but she would have no right to record her in his house (he has a reasonable expectation of privacy, because it's his house). The Police in Illinois would be compelled to do nothing, by law.

The only way that she could have a legal leg to stand on here is for her to get him to add her to the deed to the house, then she would have the same reasonable expectation of privacy and the Police would be compelled to arrest him, but she might as well marry and clean out his bank account - it would be a faster revenge.... according to Illinois law...
 Phil_McCracken
Joined: 11/18/2009
Msg: 124 (view)
 
Told me to get rid of my pets
Posted: 2/8/2012 11:24:34 PM
OP:

To me this seems not so much as an "animal issue" as it is dealing with someone who wants to get into your pants and is searching for a way out now.

He obviously lied when he said that he had no issues with the animals that you keep, but now all of the sudden - he does? He's looking for the "exit strategy", but don't give him one - he doesn't deserve it. You say that you are seeing others right now, keep doing that, if he clearly lied to you about the cats, he's probably seeing others too.

Lastly, you comment as to him being a jerk, but he does have his good qualities. it like this, if he tips the balance (you have decide what the "tipping point is") to him being "tossed" due to the fact that he has an unacceptable amount of "bad" versus "good", well then ditch him.

BTW - I lost both of my cats in my divorce and they were two of the most affectionate creatures that I have ever met in my entire life, which I miss both of them very much as well as worry about their well being.

I wish you luck.
 Phil_McCracken
Joined: 11/18/2009
Msg: 24 (view)
 
when women wee...
Posted: 1/20/2012 10:08:39 PM
hotmerlot:



Most of us just shake the last few drops off.


Would that be "Good to the last drop", just like Maxwell House coffee?

P.S. Anything more than shaking 3 times is is considered "playing with yourself" - I read that on a bathroom wall once, along with some poetry, phone numbers and answers to the mid-term in Calculus II. Boy, I never realized that Elementary school had so much writing on the walls...
 Phil_McCracken
Joined: 11/18/2009
Msg: 18 (view)
 
when women wee...
Posted: 1/20/2012 1:54:46 PM
OP:

Why is everyone being so rough on this obviously inexperienced lad? Just give him a break and tell him the correct answer and stop screwing with his mind!!!

Women wipe their mouths after going "Weeeeeee!!!", just like that pig on the "zip-line" in the Geico commercial. Remember - "Pure adrenaline",just like this question.
 Phil_McCracken
Joined: 11/18/2009
Msg: 399 (view)
 
Justifying Cheating?
Posted: 1/6/2012 7:17:34 AM
Larissan04:

Whist I agree with 90% of your posting here, I tend to disagree with the following statement:


nothing is more pathetic than a 50+ year old man who is out trolling for tail. the old guy in the club is someone you feel sorry for.


I think that it would be more pathetic if the 50+ year man was married, which is unfortunately more common than not.
 Phil_McCracken
Joined: 11/18/2009
Msg: 42 (view)
 
Mistakes of the inexperienced?
Posted: 1/1/2012 12:05:34 AM
wvwaterfall:


I'm sure I'm not the only one here who proves your assumption wrong.


I'm not a betting man, but I would say that in this regard, you're going to be the exception rather than the rule. Time will tell on this thread....
 Phil_McCracken
Joined: 11/18/2009
Msg: 29 (view)
 
Mistakes of the inexperienced?
Posted: 12/30/2011 10:47:20 AM
OP,

There are a lot of "assumed ideas" floating in this thread.

1) It is assumed that you will be considered "dishonest" if you don't tell her that your a virgin. Wrong ! This is on a "need to know" basis and if she doesn't need to know, why risk telling. You run only bad risks in this area (she could laugh at you, you could get embarrassed to the point that you "freeze up", etc.). I really doubt that ANYONE that has posted in this thread has confessed up that "I'm a virgin" the first time that they "did it" - AND they were a virgin the first time that they "did it" - by definition. So, IMHO - that's just bad advice.

2) It is assumed that she is she is great in bed. She might just as well as be bad in bed as good. What info are you going off of? Her opinion? I am sure that her opinion is going to be flowery, highlighting her in the best light (everyone tries to portray themselves in this manner - human nature), but I would assume that at least some of her former "bed-mates" might have a different opinion. Statistically, she has just as good a chance as being better, or worse than you in the sack.

3) It is assumed that you'll be nervous. Right, but so will she. Women are generally more nervous than men (in this area, IMO), because they are concerned about roughly 200 things at exactly that moment. Things like: how do I look, do I look fat, does this guy really like me, does this guy love me, do I really look that fat, OMG - that's the first "meat shillelagh" I've ever seen, this guy has a hump on his back, will my kids have humps on their backs, I wonder if he can look at "China patterns" for the dinnerware tomorrow, do I need to go on a diet to get rid of this fat and most importantly "how do I tell him "wrong hole"". Realistically, she's going to be just as nervous as you, so skip the "virgin" speech.

4) It is assumed that you will be "clueless" as to what to do - Wrong again! This is nature, does a deer have to be instructed as what to do? No. What is different is determining what she will want (deers don't try for orgasm - at least to my limited knowledge) so, just ask. Look at it this way - you have been given a new toy to play with (Yes, she has a new toy to play with as well). Act like a kid, but try to respond to what she responds to. Play around a lot at first, but when it comes to the actual act - communicate a lot. Telling her what feels good to you is just as important as what she is telling you what is good for her. If everything is working well, then the "issue" of being a virgin is a "moot" point. If it's not working, well it probably wasn't going to work no matter what, because some people can never be pleased.

Just try to have fun together - that's what it's all about after all - right?

If that all fails, do what NASCAR fans do, get her drunk in your pickup truck, drive to your aluminum trailer (I am not advocating drinking and driving here, nor living in "aluminum"), then argue with her. Next you can then both pass out on your dog and when you both wake-up, have sloppy make-up sex on the hood of the car that is up on cinder blocks out in front of the trailer. Yee-haw!
 Phil_McCracken
Joined: 11/18/2009
Msg: 53 (view)
 
Thank you for a lovely night. But I didn't feel any attraction. I am sorry.
Posted: 12/23/2011 7:53:12 AM
FyrKrakn,

1) I can still communicate at 500 feet, the bullhorn is just another thing that I have to lug around.

2) I really doubt that anyone can shoot a spitwad 100 feet (do I hear a MythBuster's challenge?), but even in the remotest sense of possibilities if it were possible, I'm not worth the spit.
 Phil_McCracken
Joined: 11/18/2009
Msg: 52 (view)
 
getting in someones car
Posted: 12/23/2011 7:46:22 AM
DebiDuzDishes,

You've never had a "one night stand"? Well, what exactly do you put your phone and clock radio on when you go to bed? I prefer 2 night stands, one for each side of my bed.
 Phil_McCracken
Joined: 11/18/2009
Msg: 49 (view)
 
getting in someones car
Posted: 12/22/2011 9:56:49 PM
Everything is a risk in life and even the most "street-wise" person can become the victim of a crime - it's just statistics. Trouble is, does one let fear rule their life? While it is true that Ted Bundy got a lot of his victims to walk to his car, his victims represented only a very small percentage of the amount of women that walked into a car of a stranger on that particular day. I think that if you're reasonable, moderately intuitive, that you can assume that the risk is worth the benefit. ( This is assuming that you know that a guy with a van, duct tape, a bag of candy and not wearing underwear is probably going to be in the "high risk" category).

Another way of looking at this is plane travel. When planes crash, usually most people die. Now you could get a seat over the wing, carry an oxygen tank and even duct tape yourself to a bulkhead, but realistically - you're toast just like the pilot is when the plane crashes. You can let fear rule your life, or you can let your life rule fear.

One last comment here about "internet dating" and how "unsafe" it really is. Here's two scenarios:

1) Meet someone in a bar 20 years ago - your body is found in a ditch the next day - case is never solved.
2) Meet someone online - some malfeasance happens to you - there is an "electronic trace" right back to the person that did the malfeasance - case is solved.

I don't know about you, but I think that it is safer now than back then.
 Phil_McCracken
Joined: 11/18/2009
Msg: 50 (view)
 
Thank you for a lovely night. But I didn't feel any attraction. I am sorry.
Posted: 12/22/2011 9:13:30 PM
hotmerlot:

We never really went out - you rejected all of my advances (realistically, what sane woman wouldn't?). The "Order of Protection" is up for it's annual renewal (just a reminder), so could you be a dear and decrease the distance from 500 feet to 100 feet, it's really getting hard to lug around the binoculars. Thanks.
 Phil_McCracken
Joined: 11/18/2009
Msg: 46 (view)
 
Thank you for a lovely night. But I didn't feel any attraction. I am sorry.
Posted: 12/21/2011 10:22:06 PM
OP:

Don't be dissuaded by what everyone has posted in this thread as far as "forgetting her" and "moving on".

I think that it would be much more entertaining for you to pursue her. Stand outside her house and sing to her, show up "unannounced" at her desk at work, go to her church, follow her in the mall (less than 10 feet, just so she knows that you care), talk to her relatives/friends at their jobs/homes/outhouses. Don't stop until the "Order of Protection" goes into effect - that'll show her that you mean business. Remember, nothing says "I love you and nobody else can have you", like a court order....
 Phil_McCracken
Joined: 11/18/2009
Msg: 50 (view)
 
Got Stood Up Tonight!
Posted: 12/21/2011 10:01:16 PM
OP:

I am new to this online dating thing, but I have been "stood up" on one "impromtu" date that I had arranged through "Craigslist" (Well, you have to give it to me for being creative).

I posted an ad that said that I wanted to go out for a drink at a local bar and got 3 replies, two were flakes and the third seemed decent. I agreed to meet the third at an agreed upon bar (I am not really a "drinker", but it gives a place to have a conversation) and I waited 45 minutes for her to show up. I realized that I got "stood up", but I made the best of the situation and talked to several patrons as I waited. When I got home, she called me on my cell phone and apologized up and down for standing me up and confessed that she became "chicken" to go out and meet a complete stranger. I took the high road and forgave her and we E-mailed for about 6 months after that, but I never did actually meet her in person, because I had deduced that we wouldn't be a good match through the E-mails alone.

I think that women stand men up out of fear (physical harm, rejection, whatever) and men stand women up out of the simple fact that they are hiding something (40 extra lbs., a 1979 orange Ford Pinto station wagon, a wife/girlfriend, or a wife and a girlfriend, whatever).

This guy didn't meet you because he has a "prehensile tail" that he was afraid that you wouldn't like that really doesn't seem to bother his wife and his girlfriend (his wife's sister).
 Phil_McCracken
Joined: 11/18/2009
Msg: 107 (view)
 
Ex girlfriend sends me this text today...how do I play this?
Posted: 12/21/2011 7:21:17 PM
HFF:

It's like I said before, she has a bad self image of herself - probably as a result of being around all of those "highly competitive" sorority girls. You probably do still love her and she will probably make things "seem" normal for a couple of months, but just like hugging a fire (it warms you up until you get burnt) - this can't last. You'll know exactly when to call it quits, which when your level of self-respect evens with hers. I took 18 months to come to that conclusion, which occurred when I was repairing the radiator on her car in an alley behind her apartment and she started to yell at me for taking so long, because she was late for a date.

You'll know when you hit "rock-bottom" - I did. Never been there since.

BTW - all of your relatives' and friends' opinion of her is 100% correct, but you won't accept that/acknowledge that until you hit the bottom. I only wish you speed to the bottom, that's the ONLY way it is ever going to get better for you. (Been there - done that).
 Phil_McCracken
Joined: 11/18/2009
Msg: 92 (view)
 
Ex girlfriend sends me this text today...how do I play this?
Posted: 12/20/2011 8:49:42 PM
HockeyFF,

You have to absolutely stay away from her. I have had this exact situation happen in my life, but it went on for approximately 18 months. I think that in my case it came from the person that I loved (who, now looking back through time didn't love me) had a bad self image of herself and needed an "ego boost" when some guy would give her his number at a bar. She obviously doesn't love you (although I will predict in the coming days she will say, "I never realized what I had until I lost you"). She will become extremely persistent in trying to convince you to take her back, because you will have "worth" as "being the forbidden fruit", but truth be told - the sooner she has you - the sooner she is going to be gone. In my case, the girl had no malice towards me, no "ax to grind", but nonetheless she had low self-esteem and needed validation from as many men as she could get. You will "stick to your guns" and ignore her when she has dragged you down to her "self-esteem" level - that's what happened in my case. I finally "broke it off" when I decided that I didn't like myself anymore as a result of what "depths" I would go to to make the relationship work. It's just like Larissan04 says," it isn't love if you are in it alone."

I wish you luck.

P.S. You really have to close that door for the next one to open.
 Phil_McCracken
Joined: 11/18/2009
Msg: 46 (view)
 
Do people approach dating with an attitude of defeat?
Posted: 12/5/2011 7:41:57 PM
MikeWM:

Foot fetishists "shoes" defeat over "sock-cess".

I'll go get some professional help now - I obviously need some after that statement.
 Phil_McCracken
Joined: 11/18/2009
Msg: 39 (view)
 
Cheating with internet dating
Posted: 11/28/2011 12:55:41 PM
Here's a solution:

When you're posing as this "other woman" get him to talk bad about his girlfriend (that would still be technically you). Get him to talk all kinds of trash, then get depressed, get drunk, "copy and paste" that sheet on this forum (so that can generate some more drama), tell your relatives, your friends, go to the cemetery and tell all of your dead relatives and friends. Then get back at him by sleeping with his brother, his father and his dead grandfather. Lastly, call Jerry Springer and schedule a show date with him.

I've tried to maximize the drama here - anyone, please let me know if I left out anything.
 Phil_McCracken
Joined: 11/18/2009
Msg: 26 (view)
 
How do you know you are with the right girl?
Posted: 11/28/2011 12:45:09 PM
While its true that a person becomes more attractive the more you become in love with them, but if there is no initial spark - there's no fire to spread.

You might find her physically attractive, but it there was something that really "got your tail wagging" about her, you wouldn't be seeking approval for ending the relationship on the forum, so I'll help you out. Let her go. If she's as attractive as you say that she is, she should have no problem finding someone who she will "spark" with. The advice is "bi-directional", so the same applies to you - go find someone who will make you happy too. There's someone for everyone - just takes time to find them and the knowledge to know when you have to "take a pass" and keep looking.
 Phil_McCracken
Joined: 11/18/2009
Msg: 18 (view)
 
Matches aren't good
Posted: 11/28/2011 12:30:48 PM
Matches? We don' need any stinkin' matches! I don'have to show you any stinkin' matches....

(Maybe I read this wrong and I thought it was "badges" - Oh, well).

Lighters are better than matches anyways and when you play with matches...you always get burned. Just ask any mom.
 Phil_McCracken
Joined: 11/18/2009
Msg: 30 (view)
 
Need advice
Posted: 11/28/2011 12:23:27 PM
Wolf925:

You said in the original post:

"I've met 2 women from here and I like them both.. One wants a relationship and the other is more into the friends with benefits type relationship.."

My 2 questions:

1) Can then find the "Forum Section" of POF?
2) Can they read?

If the answer is yes to both questions, I am sure that when they read this posting your problem will be automatically solved and a decision will be made for you. I would think that the answer with the highest probability will leave you without any choices.
 Phil_McCracken
Joined: 11/18/2009
Msg: 34 (view)
 
how can you get someone to like you?
Posted: 11/14/2011 9:38:06 PM
Mikewm-

I like your idea, but I would suggest a Fentanyl patch - its an opioid (opium family, so you know that you can count on the highest addiction rate) Fentanyl is approximately 100 times more potent than morphine, with 100 micrograms of fentanyl approximately equivalent to 10 mg of morphine and 75 mg of pethidine (meperidine) in analgesic activity. Mmmm, just like grandma used to make in her brownies. Take the Fentanyl away - high possibility of suicide, so if you can't have him.... - well you know the rest...
 Phil_McCracken
Joined: 11/18/2009
Msg: 29 (view)
 
how can you get someone to like you?
Posted: 11/13/2011 11:07:50 AM
justin5502-

My "McCracken" name is based off the "McCracken Kids Meal" - which contains a rock, a pipe and a lighter in an easy to open, colorful box.
 Phil_McCracken
Joined: 11/18/2009
Msg: 71 (view)
 
As the FWB turns...
Posted: 11/13/2011 10:47:17 AM
I am not making any comments on people who do/or have participated in a FWB situation, because everyone is different in this area, so what is right for one may not be right for others.

Now that I have stated the legal-ease, my opinion of this situation is as follows:

By definition, a FWB situation relationship has both people being "friends" (that's the "F" part) and and the benefit of sex (contrary to what one would think of as being an "F" its actually the "B" part).

Here are the analogies:
They are just "playing in the sandbox (together)" until some kid comes along with a better toy that they are more interested in. They are just "waiting on a platform (together), until their train comes in". What most people fail to realize is that someone ALWAYS has to get hurt in this situation - its unavoidable. The person that gets hurt - is going to be the one "left behind". The train comes - one person is left to wait ALONE. The kid comes with the Nylint front loader to the sandbox and takes your "friend" away, leaving you empty and hollow, but still waiting for you kid to come along. By definition - it is sex without love, or even caring.

So, what would you have to be in order to be able to handle this type of realionship? Well, I would think that you would have to be rather detached emotionally from your friend and they from you to be able to pull this off without being the one "scarred" when the other finds what they are looking for. For me, I can't do that and not for the reason of worrying about my pain at the end, but rather their pain at the end (I hate that I am too empathetic - sometimes). They are my friend, so I would not want to hurt them in that manner (or rish being hurt myself, either).

Some people can do this (I make no judgments here), but I am one who cannot.
 Phil_McCracken
Joined: 11/18/2009
Msg: 97 (view)
 
Shall I pay $100 to him?
Posted: 11/11/2011 10:53:14 PM
This is an easy problem to solve, just make another bet for "double, or nothing", which would be that he can't go for 1 minute without lying" - as soon as he opens his mouth - you win!!! (BTW - how do can you tell when a lawyer is lying - his lips are moving...).

Here it is in German:

Dies ist eine einfache Aufgabe zu lösen, stellen Sie einfach eine andere Wette für "Doppel-, oder gar nichts", die sein, dass er sich nicht für 1 Minute gehen, ohne zu lügen "würde - sobald er den Mund aufmacht -! Sie gewinnen (BTW - wie können Sie sagen, wenn ein Anwalt lügt - seine Lippen bewegen ...). Dann rufen Sie ihn ein Schwein Gesicht. Dann bleiben einem Hammer in den Arsch.
 Phil_McCracken
Joined: 11/18/2009
Msg: 36 (view)
 
Tossing the Salad
Posted: 11/11/2011 10:38:20 PM
When I looked up the ingredients that "Tossed Salad" has, all I could find on the label was:
1) Feces
2) E. coli 0157:H7

Which would explain why there is that health department sign in all restaurant bathrooms that says:

"Employees must wash hands before returning to work and don't even THINK about tossing any salad on the job today..."

OR

"Los empleados deben lavarse las manos antes de volver al trabajo y no de PENSAR en lanzar cualquier ensalada en el trabajo hoy..."
 Phil_McCracken
Joined: 11/18/2009
Msg: 19 (view)
 
How do you tell a guy....
Posted: 11/11/2011 10:23:20 PM
ElizabethB, write a letter to your boyfriend in spray paint on the side of his car that says the following:

Dear Needledick,

When we have sex - I can't feel you in me because your pee pee is way too small, it's smaller than a cub scout's pee pee. Could you wrap some "Duct Tape" around that sucker then next time you try to "Ring my bell"? Speaking of "ringing my bell" - you don't - and I KNOW MY BELL WORKS!!! Try using the following on me: pull my hair (I usually cum when a wad of hair is "yanked out" to give me a fresh bald spot), call me dirty names like "Betty Crocker", or "Aunt Jemima". Thing that have also worked on me in the past: pliers, pins (or any sharp object for that matter),bag over my head with a rubber band sealing the bag to my throat, blowtorches, the RNC, or just about anything that will leave a permanent mark on my flesh to remember the occasion by in the decades to come.

Make sure that he has a large enough car to read it all, or try practicing now to write really small with a spray can. If he leaves you as a result of this - then he clearly wasn't your type and you have to "move on" to the next suitable abuser.
 Phil_McCracken
Joined: 11/18/2009
Msg: 25 (view)
 
how can you get someone to like you?
Posted: 11/11/2011 9:54:50 PM
Cash is good, but that is usually expected. Now putting in a good word with the pimp is a way to really "win over their hearts".
 Phil_McCracken
Joined: 11/18/2009
Msg: 71 (view)
 
Would you have sex with a machine?
Posted: 11/11/2011 9:47:33 PM
O.K. I think we need to define what the original question was here, which was - "Would you have sex with a machine?"

According to the definition in Wikipedia, a machine is:

A machine manages power to accomplish a task, examples include, a mechanical system, a computing system, an electronic system, and a molecular machine. In common usage, the meaning is that of a device having parts that perform or assist in performing any type of work. A simple machine is a device that transforms the direction or magnitude of a force.

According to the freedictionary.com, the definition of inanimate object is:

1. Not having the qualities associated with active, living organisms. See Synonyms at dead.
2. Not animated or energetic; dull.
3. Grammar Belonging to the class of nouns that stand for nonliving things

So, using these two definitions one can see that having sex with the following WOULD be what the OP was asking about, because they ARE machines:
1) Vending machine.
2) Coin operated laundry equipment.
3) Any household appliance that uses power (including the steam operated ones).
4) An ATM (there's a reason why you should wash your hands after making a withdrawl due to someone's deposit - just remember that...).
5) Any sex toy that uses power (politicians use power, but are never considered sex toys, butt some politicians are considered "dildos", so this again would be a gray area).
6) Any mode of transportation, just remembering that most can and will cause injury (sharp edges - hot surfaces - moving parts), very tricky...
7) Can opener.

The following WOULD NOT be what the OP was asking about, due to the fact that they are inanimate objects:
1) Dildo - not battery equipped.
2) Rubber simulated body parts - ass, tits,**** mouth, **** and for you people that really need therapy - arm pits, nose and let us not forget the rubber eye socket.
3) My ex-wife - I thank God for the divorce, because I always wanted to call the coroner to validate the "time of death" when I would have sex with her. I still have issues in this area - I still think that I am a necrophile and I really get nervous when a woman that I am having sex with is moving, moaning and then starts to complain - I just can't get used to that...

I know that some of that answers posted here are funny (my favorite is the waffle iron) and fiction based (like the female terminator in "Terminator 3", called T-X or Terminatrix (not to be confused with Terminex - the bug people), but if I was to have sex with a machine - I'd want it to be with something that actually exists AND is better than any machine that anyone else would have sex with on this forum (it's competition in the dating world - right?), so that would have to be the accelerator at CERN. Just look at the reasons:
1) She costs more than your machine.
2) She's faster than your machine (she can accelerate to 99.9999% the speed of light).
3) She uses more power than your machine.
4) She needs more people (with higher educations, too) to operate than your machine.
5) She has less reliability than your machine.
6) She's already been screwed by politicians and physicists which not other machine has...
7) Lastly, if you get caught screwing her - I am SURE that you will make it into the nightly news...

I never realized that the accelerator at CERN was just like the women on "Jersey Wives" - huh - who'd would have thunk that...
 Phil_McCracken
Joined: 11/18/2009
Msg: 38 (view)
 
EX GF wants to be friends and possibly get back together. What is my best move here?
Posted: 10/19/2011 7:38:54 PM
FFHockey,

Take it from someone who has been in this exact situation - DROP HER!!!! Don't call, don't answer the phone when she calls - have nothing to do with her. What she is doing is seeing other guys on the side - trust me - I have seen this before. You are the "back up", the nice guy she keeps around just in case one of the one's that she's dating drops her. The first week is the toughest, but it really gets easier as time goes on and if you meet someone else - it goes even faster!

Never have anything to do with her ever again - period. She can't be trusted. I didn't follow this advice when it was given to me 24 years ago and I lost 23 years of my life to a person like this and am still losing to this very day. There are women that are much more honest than she is and require a ton less effort to get along with - I know - I've been there.

You'll heal, but learn the lesson from this and grow.

Good luck.
 Phil_McCracken
Joined: 11/18/2009
Msg: 88 (view)
 
Educated?
Posted: 10/11/2011 1:25:57 PM
mikewm~

"it can be seen to come across as someone looking for a meal ticket if theyre not on a similar par themselves but its what theyre looking for"

I would definately agree with this statement, but I would widen the focus to include anyone seeking anyone that is better in any finacial aspect. Face it, gold-digging goes on and it's not tied to any one sex. I know of more woman that are suppporting deadbeat husbands than I know of any women that are gold-diggers (maybe its the water in Chicago that produces this phenomenon - I do not know).

At the risk of sounding like a "fan boy", I can guarantee that Larissan04 does not look down upon anyone. I have talked with her on the phone and she is one of the most open minded individuals that I have talked to in a long time. She does have the preference of dating men with degrees, but that is not bad - its just a preference, just like wanting to date a man that is 6 foot tall, or a woman that is less than 4 foot 9 inches tall. We all have our reasons for what we do like and what we don't and guess what? All of the reasons are right and all of the reasons are wrong, because the reasons just support our arguments for our choice. What's our choices based on, OUR OPINIONS. So, at the end of the day - it all comes down to opinion. That's it, everyone is entitiled to their own opinion and everyone's opinion is both right and wrong, because nobody truly can change anyone else's opinion, especially on a hot-bed (no pun intended) topic like this.

mikewm, I hope the kettle came to a boil, this thread certainly did, as far as you comment about looking down upon someone, I think that at being 5 foot 4 inches, it is almost impossible for Larissan04 to look down upon anyone, so she doesn't...
 Phil_McCracken
Joined: 11/18/2009
Msg: 338 (view)
 
Short Men
Posted: 9/23/2011 8:52:56 PM
Hitsingle:

I am so stupid, of course it took only one kick - you're name says it all "Hitsingle", which in reverse is "single hit" - sorry for my misunderstanding - I should comprehend more before posting.

Vegas Gambit:

I tried to figure out the ways that air travel could be much more comfortable for short people and the only two ways that I could come up with was:

1) sleeping in the overhead
2) being "cradled" by one of the flight waitresses, you know, some of that,"rock a by baby, in the tree top..." stuff..

I could only find ways that would be cheaper to fly, which are:

1) Be a "stowaway" in a "carry-on" baggage.
2) Being in someone's "check in" baggage.
3) There's always the "pet carrier" thing.
4) Plus a couple that I just plain forgot.
 Phil_McCracken
Joined: 11/18/2009
Msg: 26 (view)
 
Still Married but at its end and still living together.
Posted: 9/20/2011 9:31:58 PM
To the OP:

This guy is an "ex-con"? He's "disappearing for day/weeks on end? Sounds like he's either moving product, or running from the law. Get rid of him, you're not going to fix this one - he's broken. Look elsewhere. Even on here, you have an 85% chance of getting a better pick than him (well certainly a shorter "rap" sheet). If all else fails, wear a "wire" under your bra and the next time he gets "frisky" with you and finds the wire - watch him run like a pedofile runs from from Cris Hansen. Good luck with "taking out the trash".
 Phil_McCracken
Joined: 11/18/2009
Msg: 332 (view)
 
Short Men
Posted: 9/20/2011 8:51:16 PM
To the OP:

I think the idea of women wanting to be with taller men is just instinct. Back in the "cavemen days" (if our economy doesn't improve soon we WILL be back in the caveman days again) - females selected the best to have offspring with, so that their offspring had the best chance of reproducing. It is nature's process of "Natural Selection". This is a basic instinct - very hard to overcome for most women and men too! I say, get a blue coat with white lapels and lots of buttons and medals on the front and partially stick your hand in it, it worked for Napoleon, right?

hitsingle:

3 questions:

1) What music did you have playing in your Ipod whilst you played "midget toss" was it amything by Randy Neuman? Hmmm?
2) How many kicks DID it take? 3 maybe 4? Did he scream, "Oh, not me Lucky Charms" ever?
3) Did you bring him back to the house to see if you could get him to the curb in one really good punt? You know - practice makes perfect...
 Phil_McCracken
Joined: 11/18/2009
Msg: 65 (view)
 
cheaters ruin lives
Posted: 9/20/2011 8:10:59 PM
jan1025 is correct, it will take some time for you to heal.

The amount of time depends on the type of person you are. If you are "thick-skinned" it will take less time, because relationships aren't of any value. If you are "thin-skinned" (which most people are when it comes to matters of the heart and you do sound like you are form the tone of this post) it will take time for you to build up trust again.

It also depends on how deep the relationship was. Clearly, you were in pretty deep - just short of the whole, "I do" thing. Being "thin-skinned", wearing your heart on your sleeve and living together, will probably max. you out on any estimates for true healing.

Take your time, it might be 4 years, but you will recover. Don't listen to any of your friends' advice if they tell you to go for a "rebound romance", that just delays the healing process, you'll just be right back where you are now when that ceases. You'll know when your ready to" get back in the saddle."
 Phil_McCracken
Joined: 11/18/2009
Msg: 19 (view)
 
Sexless......honeymoon?? WTF???
Posted: 9/20/2011 7:54:46 PM
To the op:

This sound like it's more psychologically based than anything else. Most people react in different ways to different situations. For some, any change is detrimental and they show a response as such. What changed here? They got married.

He probably is not dealing well at all with his newly accepted role. Now, I could say what I feel about this - tell him to go see a shrink for the sake of his sanity and the sake of his marriage.

The "PC" thing to say is you both should seek counselling, but realistically - it's his problem, so you can drive him there and do the whole "uh huh" thingy for 45 min. and make sure that he actually takes his meds...

To M14shooter:

About going to a "church based" counseling - yeah you're right about them. I had to go to the Catholic version of "pre-marriage" counseling and it was taught by a guy that I went to grammar school and high school with. I had to choke back the laughter as he and his wife went through the script, because I knew how bad and violent their marriage actually was (she beat up on him). They were married for 23 years and he left her for a 23 year old girl (BTW - his oldest boy is 6 months younger than the new girlfriend). I thought that whole relationship was very "surrealistic" and "humorous".
 Phil_McCracken
Joined: 11/18/2009
Msg: 36 (view)
 
Phone Sex
Posted: 9/20/2011 7:15:09 PM
1) Where a person lives, or does not live shouldn't be up for discussion - it's just wrong.
2) Why do some men do these things, for many reasons:

It's taboo, if sticking your finger in a light socket tomorrow became an illegal act, there are those among us that would do it just to fly in the face of the authorities, never mind the fact that it causes injury, pain and possible death, they'd do it just because.

Some people are truly perverts, it is part of the fringe of the bell curve. They can't "get off" with the touch of another human, so they find "other" ways to get off. I am not making any judgments here, I am merely stating that these people do exist.

Some people have no people skills, they are terribly afraid of the opposite sex. There could be many reasons for this, multiply rejections, having low-self esteem, whatever.

Some people have mental issues where they are truly incapable of having an orgasm through the "normal" accepted means, thus they have to go the deviant route.

The real reason probably lies somewhere amongst what I have proposed above, plus all of the possibilities that I couldn't even think of. I will go on record as saying that I prefer the gentle touch and smell of a woman as opposed to a LCD screen. Whatever you do, stay safe and happy.
 Phil_McCracken
Joined: 11/18/2009
Msg: 16 (view)
 
Breaking up ediquette
Posted: 9/19/2011 5:57:24 AM
Clearly the OP was asking for a guy's opinion on this, so I would suggest that the next time that you (this is for the guys now) are at her parent's house, pinch her mom's butt, wink at her and say, " Mrs. Robinson, could you pass me the Grey Poupon? I'm pretty sure that all of this decision making will not be necessary after that one - the family and you're soon-to-be ex-girlfriend should be in a unanimous decision that you have to go.

If that doesn't work (this doesn't work in the Appalachian areas of the U.S., due to the fact that it is actually encouraged), then make a pass at her grandmother and continue to make passes until you find the "key" person that is going to object. I would stop at her dad and if he doesn't object then I'd go for "faking your death" at that point.

All joking aside, Id use the yardstick of treating them at any point like the way that you'd want to be treated. If he/she was a total *sshole, still take the high road - the low road is filled with construction and pot-holes and besides no matter how ugly it becomes, you'll both be better off if one of the two of you keeps their sanity during the process. Remember, it takes two to tango and if you're not dancing in the argument - the other side of the dance routine dies down pretty fast.javascript:smilie('')
 Phil_McCracken
Joined: 11/18/2009
Msg: 78 (view)
 
The Single Greatest Problem Damaging All American Politics
Posted: 9/1/2011 7:01:19 AM
Change will not occur in this country until people are "hungry enough" to want change. Historically speaking, people can have thrights and freedoms taken away up until the point that they start to starve - this country is not at that point yet. I know that this thread is about politics, but politics is driving economics and vice-versa. Changing the players via elections results in no benenfit, the country is still in an economic tailspin. The middle class is dying. It has gotten an infection since Reagan killed the air traffic controllers union and as a result of that, all unions have had a target on them. The MBAs and accountants have decided that unions are not a good thing, so move to the south where it's "non-union" based. When it got too expensive to manufacture there, move to Mexico, then to China. We've lost most of our manufacturing capabilities in the U.S. You can't have a "service-based" economy, everyone can't be wiping each other's butts, someone has to make the toilet paper, we just can't sustain this situation any longer.
My theory - let the U.S. file for bankruptcy - that's when real change will happen, rhetoric-style, or armed violence style (I personally believe that armed violence style is where this is all heading, because if the whole economy collapses and your kid hasn't eaten in 5 days and that "wheelbarrow" of money isn't enough to buy a loaf of bread, you'll take a gun and get a loaf off of someone that has one, but no gun - right?). I personally think that the U.S. government should triple the capacity that it prints money at right now. Every dollar that they print right now makes the debt that we owe the Chinese go down, because the dollar is worth less each day (how's that for paying back your debt?- ha). The Chinese haven't played fair, with financially manipulating the value of their yuan to our dollar. Dollar drops - Yuan drops. Our products are PREMANENTLY not price competative, thus everything HAS to be manufactured in China, by definition. Don't blame companies for this, if company "X" is manufacturing in China and sells their product for 50% of what it costs (cost - NOT selling price here) company "Y" to make their competative product for, what are the choices for company "Y"? 1) make their product in China 2) go out of business.
Any idiot (including me) can see where this is going - the economy is going to crumble, regardless of whether you are "Blue", "Red", or like me (Libertarian/Independent - fool).
I say, "Sit back and enjoy the ride", because the "Great Depression" of 1929 is going to look like "Disneyland" in comparison to what is in store for all of us in the next 18-24 months. Some advice here: invest in metals - gold, silver and lead. You'll need the gold and silver to trade for things you'll need and you'll need the lead to keep everything yours. I hope I am wrong here, but this seems more of a probable senario than anyone that is currently involved in politics has suggested to avoid. Sorry for the novel and venting, I'll go back to being quiet again.
 
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