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 Author Thread: What's up with gold chains and motorbikes? Don't understand.
 Whole 9 Yards
Joined: 6/6/2006
Msg: 18 (view)
What's up with gold chains and motorbikes? Don't understand.
Posted: 12/6/2011 10:33:01 AM
Harley has done a wonderful marketing job of commoditizing and popularizing "safe rebellion". Personally, it's a bit "Wild Hogs", no?
Perhaps a cross promotion is in order. Harley,Viagra, Cash for Gold, Hair Club and Nutri-system.
Joined: 6/6/2006
Msg: 40 (view)
Do all single moms have problems with dating?
Posted: 8/26/2011 2:34:41 PM
I want to add something that is often overlooked. I'm a single guy and been through the wars, both good and bad, with single moms. I can honestly say some SM's play the stereotypes like they are from central casting. Others have completely defied any definition.

Breaking up with one person is hard enough. Breaking up with 2, 3, 4 when 2,3,4 don't understand what is happening and may take it as their fault (especially if a pattern develops w/mom) is the most devastating thing I have ever done or been involved in. I have even stuck around because I loved the kid more than the mom.
Again, I'm no hero by any means. In fact I have avoided SM's for sometime now . I'm not saying guys don't want to date to date you to save your kids, but I'd be lying if I said hurting "your" kids wasn't a consideration.
 Whole 9 Yards
Joined: 6/6/2006
Msg: 7 (view)
Men With No Children and Their Biological Clock
Posted: 8/26/2011 1:29:55 PM
I was in the "no kids" camp for a long time. My brother and his wife had a son and I have thought it might not be a bad thing. So, I think it exists for men too. But its more mental. "who will be at my funeral type" stuff.

This new realization has wreaked havoc with dating because most women around my age or slightly younger who have kids are done. And I will state, with hesitation, that raising someone else's kid(s) does not appeal to me in the least.
Ideally I could find someone 5-10 years younger and w/o kids, but apparently unless I'm rich, that's creepy.

This is another reason why many single guys want nothing to do with single moms. They're done, they're mind is made up and there's no negotiation. I wouldn't take that deal from Giselle.
 whole 9 yards
Joined: 6/6/2006
Msg: 65 (view)
drug testing welfare applicants
Posted: 8/10/2011 2:26:36 PM
Do drug addicts make the choice to try the drug or not..........?

Thanks in advance for making my point.

Joined: 6/6/2006
Msg: 62 (view)
drug testing welfare applicants
Posted: 8/10/2011 9:39:47 AM
Addiction is a choice, not a disease. I don't give two shits about environmental triggers or predisposition.....hogwash. The addict chooses to pick-up that needle, joint etc.

Want welfare? Take the test.

No test? No money. Times are tough. You need a handout, there are gonna be provisions which have to be met.

I'm all for the birth control too. I don't give a flying fornication what anyone says, I pay for enough free lunches with stars and stripes waving behind me.
 whole 9 yards
Joined: 6/6/2006
Msg: 3 (view)
met someone on here with hiv
Posted: 8/2/2011 2:49:56 PM
I know someone who met someone with HIV on here and posted it in every forum possible.
 Whole 9 Yards
Joined: 6/6/2006
Msg: 108 (view)
Friends with Benefits... WHY!?
Posted: 7/27/2011 4:23:38 PM
Face it. Any "relationship" is a degree of FWB. Until it's legal, it's semantics for romantics.
There's just a hope that there are no other friends.....benefiting.
 Whole 9 Yards
Joined: 6/6/2006
Msg: 6 (view)
single mommy
Posted: 7/27/2011 1:12:44 PM
And there are just as many guys who will RUN at the first mention of a child.
(I'm lacing up my shoes just

Not many guys, your age or otherwise, (unless they have kids already) will want to deal with your situation. You've already announced that your son comes first.
There aren't many guys who are willing to start at #2 and pick up the ball for some other sperm donor as well.

You may have better luck looking for another young parent. A guy your age has options and will likely conclude that a young mom is not his best option. There may be some guys who try and fail (I've been there) at the whole package deal.

Just don't paint men who don't want to date you as losers etc. It is a delicate situation with three people involved. Some guys will call it baggage etc. Others will realize just how delicate the situation is and wish to pass on it. That choice doesn't make them losers.It just means they're not interested. Don't take it personally, just move on.
 Whole 9 Yards
Joined: 6/6/2006
Msg: 11 (view)
why do girls not want short first messages
Posted: 7/22/2011 2:38:17 PM
Because women want to believe that guys on line are reading their profile and being thoughtful, before they take a whopping 5 seconds to look at your pic and decide whether they would or wouldn't.
Lots of women sugar coat it, but they know within 5 seconds whether they are interested of not.
 Whole 9 Yards
Joined: 6/6/2006
Msg: 302 (view)
Are women afraid of attractive guys?
Posted: 7/21/2011 5:48:42 PM
I believe some women are.
Those are the ones who are used to being "the hot one" in relationship.
Playas or men with options, can sometimes upset the balance of power. It does not compute.

Others are just shy.
 Whole 9 Yards
Joined: 6/6/2006
Msg: 37 (view)
Interesting 'Good Guys Finish Last' Theory
Posted: 7/21/2011 5:33:58 PM

In other words, they find out he's boring.

Think about it.

Until you're knocked up and being f-ed over regularly.

Funny how boring becomes secure, predictable becomes get the idea.

First mistake: Don't ask women for advice on this. You will get as many different opinions as there are stars in the sky. Rule 1. Women don't know what they want so asking them will accomplish nothing.

Thus far, I agree 100%.
 whole 9 yards
Joined: 6/6/2006
Msg: 56 (view)
I Under stand
Posted: 7/20/2011 3:03:10 PM
Msg 48/49

You two didn't read her profile.
It was another woman with kids, expecting a man without kids to drop everything and fall on her ex's sword.

I don't have an agenda, other than to remind the OP that it is awful ironic that she expects a guy to come in and clean up the mess (and with that many kids, he'd better be the Brawny man) but she doesn't want to get her hands dirty with someone else's kids.

I love these chivalrous forum heroes......

 whole 9 yards
Joined: 6/6/2006
Msg: 37 (view)
so many non-religious girls whts the deal
Posted: 7/20/2011 2:53:49 PM
As far as I'm concerned, most organized religion is designed to rule through fear and to keep the status quo. That being, women home, barefoot, pregnant and subversive.
I know this is likely a conservative wetdream (and before you go nuts, I do consider myself a conservative) but I can see why people and women especially, may not want to have a relationship with god (sic).
There are lots of dudes here who wish it was the 1950's so they could trap a woman and keep her the way their relatives did. Those days are over boys.

Plus, if there is a god, it made women the ones with baby makers and bleeding parts.
I'd be f-ing pissed too.......
 whole 9 yards
Joined: 6/6/2006
Msg: 74 (view)
What should I do about this girl?
Posted: 7/20/2011 2:15:19 PM
Run, run away!
You are an option. Everything she said is a game to keep you from hating her while she yo-yo's.
One more reason not to......................................................................................................
 Whole 9 Yards
Joined: 6/6/2006
Msg: 75 (view)
For the females~ Dating Can we call it that? Hidden agendas/ & players hooked on the line and u!
Posted: 7/19/2011 1:49:31 PM
I think the true answer is located in the OP's profile.
She has the "I can't date anyone my age because men my age don't get me/can't keep up/ " disease. blah blah blah.

If she would realistically adjust her 'preferences' she's probably have no problem finding a 40-47 year old BOYFRIEND. But someone in their mid 30's who is looking to "date"(or doormat) probably isn't looking for someone 42 who doesn't want more children.
 Whole 9 Yards
Joined: 6/6/2006
Msg: 17 (view)
Meet you feature - do guys use that instead of messaging?
Posted: 7/18/2011 11:29:15 AM
With all the "read/unread deleted",it's easier to wink by using the meet me feature than crafting a nice email that may be construed as nice and engaging or stalker-ific depending on the inevitable list of her "preferences".
 Whole 9 Yards
Joined: 6/6/2006
Msg: 8 (view)
Are Men really here to meet Women, or just hangout ?
Posted: 7/11/2011 2:33:41 PM
To embrace the "fishing" analogy....if my dating life is a fishing trip, then this site is just another line in the water. It's the only line I can really check while working.

Truthfully, you may be running across guys who have egos which are writing checks they themselves, couldn't hope to cash.

Personally, I know who(and what type of woman) I write to. And I can bet that just about every swinging Richard here writes to the same women.

I have dated some nice women, but no keepers. Fish on.
 whole 9 yards
Joined: 6/6/2006
Msg: 47 (view)
Its so hard to find someone when your a single mum !
Posted: 6/30/2011 2:52:41 PM

People without kids should really keep their uninformed opinions to themselves and single parents need to keep their priorities in check. The end!

But you'd prefer a single guy with no kids (or maybe just one.....)
 Whole 9 Yards
Joined: 6/6/2006
Msg: 59 (view)
Choking during sex
Posted: 6/28/2011 6:23:44 PM
I was dating a woman a while back who liked it rough. Choking, hair pulling, and some other really rough stuff. She would sometimes rabbit punch me when she wanted it harder. She was also extremely petite as well. I didn't like it at all. I was so worried about hurting her I had trouble concentrating and having fun.
There's a difference between intense sex and rough for me. Intense is great. Rough is not IMO. I know most women enjoy a nice manhandling when they like you, but there's affection there.
 whole 9 yards
Joined: 6/6/2006
Msg: 154 (view)
Would You Date a Women with 6 children?
Posted: 6/10/2011 1:34:50 PM
No. X6.

messages this short cannot be posted
Joined: 6/6/2006
Msg: 615 (view)
Posted: 6/7/2011 11:25:24 AM
To be safe, whenever a woman gives me her "number" I just take it, double it and add 30.
That way, I there's no wounded expectations. Most women lie blatantly about it, so I help them with it. (Those women who actually date and don't just b*tch about it...)
Joined: 6/6/2006
Msg: 33 (view)
What does it feel like for a man?
Posted: 6/7/2011 11:00:50 AM

does the man actually know she has had one???

I think the more relevant question is, does he care?
 whole 9 yards
Joined: 6/6/2006
Msg: 92 (view)
Competiveness in males evolving?
Posted: 6/2/2011 1:31:02 PM
Frankly, despite your increase earning power and equality, I think men are taking a page from the woman's books and saying "UHHHHH, thanks for playing".
I'm not going to string the bow for your amusement.
Despite what you believe or have been told, every woman has one and it is not worth fighting for. guys who have had a few realize that chewing another guy's balls off for a 50/50 shot just isn't a good deployment of resources. Especially with society waving the "you go girl" flag every time your preferences change.
I have to be cutthroat all day at work. So if I come home and haev to battle for your affections, well what are doing for me? The answer has unfortunately been "not much besides letting you screw me".
Contrary to this post, I don't hate women. But I've seen enough who like to stir the pot and simply will not play.
 whole 9 yards
Joined: 6/6/2006
Msg: 454 (view)
Never married & no kids
Posted: 5/27/2011 9:59:14 AM

They are well spotted by their toys, nights out, and knowing grins on their faces.

I would have to agree with this statement.
Some of the attitudes put forth here really suck. Sounds like there are some folks who regret their family choices and want to make sure those who haven't chosen the same path are just as miserable.
 whole 9 yards
Joined: 6/6/2006
Msg: 940 (view)
Why are men so angry??? Is this true?
Posted: 5/19/2011 1:32:50 PM

That sort of thinking is a misconception. I think women want guys who are nice and who respect them, but they also want guys who are fun, who are interested in them sexually and not afraid to say so, providing they choose their words carefully to not sound like an ass. Too many people mistake being nice for being boring and mistake being respectful for not appearing to be interested in sex.

I'll agree with you partially, but IN MY OPINION and experience, the advice I speak of (from women) is a one way ticket to the friend zone. And I'll go as far to say that men may misinterpret the advice and it turns into "faux nice guy, internet facade" you speak of.
Guys need to put a personal spin on the advice so not to turn into that fake dude.
And this is why I tell any guy who will listen, do not attempt to be friends with a woman you want to date. Frame your relationship from day one with distance if you don't know how to approach. But do not jump in and be her pal.

Frankly, most women know what they want, but it isn't always congruent to what they say they want. Many women parrot the motherly "be nice" advice. But routinely ignore what they tell these guys with their choices. It's all subjective. To a woman, he may give her what she needs to stay interested. To the outside observer that behavior is often called "treating her like sh*t".
Joined: 6/6/2006
Msg: 938 (view)
Why are men so angry??? Is this true?
Posted: 5/19/2011 11:58:09 AM
Why in the WORLD would your average,reasonably balanced woman give men bad advice?

I think many men get pissed because they get advice from women, follow it and see that advice basically backfire when the woman leaves with some direspectful scumbag badboy.
I don't think it is bad advice. it's just that sometimes, it seems like women say one thing and then go and date (or "f") the exact opposite.
So when a guy sees this, he thinks the advice given was misleading.

We keep writing it in this thread and it keeps getting rationalized/explained/justified as something else.
 whole 9 yards
Joined: 6/6/2006
Msg: 11 (view)
Questions about meeting woman
Posted: 5/17/2011 10:48:04 AM
^^Pretty much 100% right on. The last paragraph makes me think there's $$ in ghostwriting.

I mean, even if you master the online pick-up you're still gonna have to have some acumen when talking to the opposite sex.

There is a serious impediment in on-line dating though. The real life meet.
To me, that is the trick going from on-line to IRL. And ironically it adds a difficult extra step. And you thought dating on-line was gonna be easy? I thought setting up dates would be easy. Chat, ask, date. I was mistaken. (I've actually got a background check on myself I can provide to quell the fears of all the nervous nellies with visions of a dateline NBC style abduction dancing in their minds)
A lot of women become isolated. they have several new fish everytime they check the net. But rather than keeping a fish (i.e. starting a relationship IRL) they just keep fishing. I'm sure guys do it too (wait, how long have I been here?) but I could care less what the guys are doing.
 whole 9 yards
Joined: 6/6/2006
Msg: 19 (view)
Travel required
Posted: 5/17/2011 10:36:26 AM
My views on this are kind of skewed.
First off, there are a lot of women on here who make it seem as if they are jetting off to exotic destinations and if you are unable to provide that wanderlust, you don't have a chance in h$ll. I dunno, but all the pictures standing in front of landmarks scream "sheeople" to me.

My problem comes in that I am very selfish with my vacation. When I am off, I am only concerned about what I want to do. I like very physical vacations.
I wanna go surfing (real surfing), biking (think x-games), debaucherizing (think Charlis Sheen, opps, this is the dating bad). But I don't want to walk around, shop and do touristy things. This is not music to a woman's ears. I could care less what you saw, what did you do?

I travel for a living (including some international travel) so the thought of airports, foreign hygiene and unintelligible yammering in a native tongue sometimes makes me wanna burn my passport when an SO says "I wanna go to...."

Actually, on second thought, "why bring sand to the beach?"
 whole 9 yards
Joined: 6/6/2006
Msg: 731 (view)
Why are men so angry??? Is this true?
Posted: 5/6/2011 1:37:03 PM
I also have found this-group social/recreational activities- to be a better way to interact, and then if I and a guy want to go out on a date, we've already established a certain degree of mutual interest and friendship.

This, in theory, is a great idea. But can be tough for some to "break" through in a group session, especially when you sites are set on ONE person in the group. And why bring competition. (I'm playing the devil's advocate here ).
I imagine, most guys who want to date really don't want to wade through 3-6 or more other people to get time to showcase with the target. This inability to get facetime probably exacerbates the "anger".

I cannot imagine why anybody of either gender would just go up and ask someone out without SOME indication from that person that there was an interest!? Really? You just go up, out of the blue and ask someone out because you are attracted to them, with no indication of interest on their part? ( I think I'm BEGINNING-maybe-to understand some of the problem here...)

It strikes me as odd too. I mean, my approach to date ratio is pretty good, but I stick to a few guidelines which have served me well. But, like in sales, I usually qualify my leads.
Have I walked up to woman I knew I'd never see again and taken a shot. Yes. It can work. But I have also been utterly humiliated (in the streets on NYC) by taking a shot.
But normally, I try to find out something and weigh the possibility of mutual attraction.

Even in the online dating venue, it would seem like one would look for interests in common, a similar sense of humor, or something in the commentary or photos that would present a basis for contacting other than looks-that's always the way I've gone about it,anyway.

You would hope so. But just as many women window shop as men. And while I know my profile seems like all puppies and rainbows, there is a thinly veiled disclaimer. Most just don't get it or think they will be the exception. But what they don't grasp is "If I don't find you attractive (yes, hot, sexy etc) then all the interesting conversations in the world won't change things". Without spelling it out, (which unlike women's profiles, which is preference not a shallow requirement) I see a lot of "bzzzz, thanks for playin'!"
Joined: 6/6/2006
Msg: 721 (view)
Why are men so angry??? Is this true?
Posted: 5/6/2011 12:00:57 PM

Hey ...I just read your message can I just point out: If women initate sex (outside an established relationship) we are deemed tarts, if we suggest a date then we are considered pushy, and men don't like it if we ask them out on a date...scary woman!!!!

Raise your hand if you are male and have had a woman that you would've asked out first, ask you out. For me, the crickets are chirping. It hasn't happened.
I'm sure it happens, but my experience has been that there was no attraction and I would've never approached them myself.
 whole 9 yards
Joined: 6/6/2006
Msg: 74 (view)
Long term in your 30's with a 20 yr old...
Posted: 4/20/2011 8:30:29 PM
I think that for a pairing of a much younger and much older person to work, the older person needs to be much less mature than the average person his/her age and the younger person needs to be more mature than the average person his/her age. I know a lot of young people. Most are very mature and intelligent. The young women I know would not be interested in having a serious relationship with a man 20 or more years older because they are bright, educated, and ambitious. They don't seek an older man who they think will provide for them financially or who is smarter or more experienced than themselves. They are also able to attract and form relationships with young men who are also bright, educated and ambitious, at their own level of maturity. Basically, I guess I think that people who pair with someone who is many years older or many years younger have issues, emotional issues or lack something in their lives, and that is why being with someone from such a divergent age group appeals to them. I realize this is probably politically incorrect, especially here on POF, but don't care.

This is such hogwash. Typical POF response. If you have to do or have or date "x" you are broken. Funny, most young ladies I meet are bright, young well educated and ambitious.
Just like me.
And their males peers?
Lacking ambition, lacking focus, lacking the skills to pay the bills. And this is from the ladies, not just my old, jaded thirty something perspective. I'm not saying all young guys are like that. But for many of them, the only thing they have going for them is their youth and they still have time to change.
While I will fully cop to some immaturity when I was younger (and even today), I made a conscious decision to get it out of my system. Sow the oats. Be a warlock (LOL).
It was a recognition of how I was at that time as a person. Fortunately, unlike many guys
I feel like I'm growing into my age and I'm okay with it. I didn't miss anything and did it all.
But your posts and my goals have made it painfully clear, just what is missing in my empty life.

A childless, 25 year old bombshell.

Opps, so much for maturity.
 whole 9 yards
Joined: 6/6/2006
Msg: 40 (view)
Why does having preference make it into a issue?
Posted: 4/20/2011 6:24:29 PM
Wow man, height to Hitler.

This place is a hoot.

Seig hiel ladies!
 whole 9 yards
Joined: 6/6/2006
Msg: 45 (view)
Why are most new rock bands terrible?
Posted: 4/20/2011 6:20:04 PM
Look at society. As much as we "celebrate diversity", if your brand of diversity is not marketable, you will be relegated to the my space horde.
Society is boring, predictable, PC and prudish.

The music of today reflects this. Very gray, forgettable.
 whole 9 yards
Joined: 6/6/2006
Msg: 19 (view)
Drop D tuning.
Posted: 4/20/2011 6:17:29 PM
Lots or rock and metal but as stated, lots of folk and blues.
Couple zeppelin songs are dadgad I think.

I play exclusively in dropped d and have developed what little style I have using it.

The chugga-chugga is cool, but there are so many cool octaves and other tones that can be explored simply because of the fretting ease. Open strings lead/rhythm. It ain't Wes Montgomery or Chet Atkins, but it gets me through without sounding like a pale copy of shitful dropped d bands. (Many listed above)
 whole 9 yards
Joined: 6/6/2006
Msg: 85 (view)
Literacy: Is it important to you?
Posted: 4/20/2011 5:50:22 PM
I like it when a woman has a necklace, or better yet, a tattoo of their name on them.
Reading is fundamental.... at least if she (or I for that matter) forgets her name, she can read it, albeit backwards, in the mirror.
 whole 9 yards
Joined: 6/6/2006
Msg: 375 (view)
Why are men so angry??? Is this true?
Posted: 4/20/2011 5:45:30 PM

Unfortunately, a lot of dating and romantic relationships are based on sexual urges. Sexual urges are based in reproductive urges. Until gestation, birthing and primary nurture/caregiving of the infant are biologically equal experiences, or human babies gestate in eggs outside the body, there is going to be an instinctive tendency for women to choose men who can be the main provider/protector in the times when she is limited by gestation,childbirth, and the early nurture of the newborn. When men start lactating, we can all be truly "equal".
I realize that some of these factors should not apply in the case of women who have firmly decided to forego motherhood, or women who are past childbearing age. But these instinct-based choices are very deeply rooted and have been intensely conditioned socially for a long, long time,and it's going to take a long time to change that. And do we REALLY want to? I don't think the phenomenon of totally voluntary single parent families are yet mainstream enough to compare their offsprings' functionality and performance with the offspring of the more traditional 2 parent family.
I do not disagree that in many areas men and women are equal,but in the matters of pair-bonding,nesting,reproduction and the rearing of young...the very things that drive and inform dating, courting, marriage, there is still an issue of biology that we haven't managed to legislate into complete sameness.

get it guys? they bleed, we pay. And we will pay until the end of time............
I guess maybe we shouldn't toss the stud/slut conundrum out yet.

Frankly if a woman is at work 12% or more(less) due to her kids, the less she gets paid. That's equality. Like those spots at the grocery store that piss me off.
"With Children Parking". You chose to squeeze out lil Johnny.(or at very least accepted the advances of the sperm donor) The person next to you in the handicapped spot most likely did not want or choose that spot......
 whole 9 yards
Joined: 6/6/2006
Msg: 168 (view)
Posted: 4/20/2011 5:26:28 PM

The double standards amaze me. Women fought for equality and got it, and now no longer "need a man" ...yet the same equality doesn't apply to the family where the man is still expected to finance and be responsible for the household when things go it any wonder we are so gunshy to get involved with single moms or even get serious with women in general these days?

No wonder our motivations are more and more led by only sex these days........

Oh snap! No he didn't!

Although I agree, thank your lucky stars that your forum posts are no longer attached to your profile.....
 whole 9 yards
Joined: 6/6/2006
Msg: 38 (view)
Why does having preference make it into a issue?
Posted: 4/20/2011 5:19:25 PM
I also checked your profile and I don't see anything that would provoke that type of response. I, like others I believe, expected to see a height requirement or something of that ilk.
(Nothing gets the POF goat like the almighty height restriction/requirement/preference.)

I am sorry that these guys are such losers that they have to try and put you down to feel better. I don't know why they do it and it sucks. I am usually ready with a smart-a$$ comment bordering on trolling, but I genuinely think this sucks. (I don't think you are or would but....) don't give up on us guys. We don't all suck (some of us just blow).
 whole 9 yards
Joined: 6/6/2006
Msg: 56 (view)
A Future I Can't Possibly Provide
Posted: 4/20/2011 4:52:09 PM
I find these profiles all the time. Pictures from here, pictures from there. "I've been to 20 countries". Big F-ing deal.

I travel for a living so the last thing I want to do for fun is get on a plane and deal with a bunch of tourists or folks yammering on in some unintelligible native tongue while their local stance on hygiene becomes painfully obvious.

Dude, don't sweat it. A lot of these women go on a vacation or two and act as if they are jet-setting world travelers. Just because they've done all the tourist-y shite, doesn't mean they got there on a private jet.

(Cue angry, "narrow minded, uncultured" characterization posts from female forum regulars as well as descriptions of feeding leperous orphans rather than touristing in 4,3,2....)

 whole 9 yards
Joined: 6/6/2006
Msg: 16 (view)
When and how to be appropriate to a woman?
Posted: 4/20/2011 4:11:24 PM
Is this a real post?

Dude has the obligatory shirtless pic but becomes sack-less about a third date?

Instead of going to the gym or texting, pick up the gdamn phone and ask for a date.


You people are getting soft here. I'm disappointed.
 whole 9 yards
Joined: 6/6/2006
Msg: 68 (view)
Impatient men! Calm down a bit for better dating success. 1 woman`s view.
Posted: 4/18/2011 2:05:51 PM
In general, I believe women and men have vastly different experiences here.

There are so many more guys than girls and men know this. We're also painfully aware that the average women many times. is getting many, many more messages than we are.

So when a guy has a woman on the line, he wants to reel her in before the (perceived) shark swims in and snatches her. It is an assumption with some(SOME, not complete) truth to it.
I've found that the majority of the women I have dated here have a lot of options and certainly aren't afraid to exercise them. Certainly not a good scene for the insecure.

Also, I have heard it from the mouths of my dates from POF: they are not ready for and in many cases enjoy, the attention.( I hate to frame it like this interms of rating, but bear with me) If a woman is a "6 or 7" she will get email from 1-8 males and maybe even some 9-10's. And the torrent of mail for many women, is not only flattering but gives them the BBD mentality. "Wow, if I got this many emails, then Prince Superman is only a click away". so they think that the bigger, better deal is coming.

If you've been here a while, you've undoubtedly seen this and other fishy fish behavior.

And women are just as guilty of window shopping.......

I had one girl with a really bytchy section on her profile dedicated to height and how a short guy shouldn't waste his time trying to email her. Yet, there she shows up in my inbox. I was 5 inches shorter than the deal breaking height, which is I believe , is in the first 5 lines of your profile. So I was either so devastatingly handsome that she forgot her dealbreaking predisposition toward tall dudes or she was just window shopping.

 whole 9 yards
Joined: 6/6/2006
Msg: 39 (view)
Crazy girls are better lovers?
Posted: 4/12/2011 8:52:35 AM
Now where are the blasted POF psychological assessment results when you need them.....
 whole 9 yards
Joined: 6/6/2006
Msg: 69 (view)
Relationships with Bartenders and Waitress
Posted: 4/11/2011 3:03:38 PM
First off, most of my best deals are made in a bar or (gasp) a strip club. Where do most married men wanna get away from? Home. So if they feel like going to a bar or club to talk business, I'm all for it.
So I know, in my experience, that although I may work 8 in the office or driving, but if the customers want to go out......well you're at their mercy.

Really though. Any guy who has half a brain in his head and can actually get it happening on the road is going to shy away from employees of the establishment unless there is a serious connection going on.
Why? First off, she's likely sober. Which really tends to put a damper on the extramarital, out of town festivities.
Second, if he's gotta get up in the morning, why in the hell would he hang out til 3:30 in the morning until bar closes and the money is counted, with a sober chick?

It does take a certain type of person to trust their SO in a traveling job. I tell each and every g-friend I have had in the last 10 years: I travel and sometimes go to bars with customers. Can't deal with it....uh bye bye. But until there is a reason to suspect me, then leave me alone about this issue.
 whole 9 yards
Joined: 6/6/2006
Msg: 63 (view)
Long term in your 30's with a 20 yr old...
Posted: 4/8/2011 9:03:16 AM

Also, what happens when he suddenly wants children. My baby factory is lockeddown. I have to be realistic and consider that letting him go may be part of the bargain we've struck, regardless of what he says now. He loves children, he is obviously not ready for them, but he will be, one day.

This is the biggest issue I have with dating women my own age. I want kids, most have been there and done that. But I don't want to bring a child into the world because it's the the thing to do at this age.
I didn't have kids when I was younger because I knew I wasn't ready. but now that I feel I'm ready, the reply (at least here is) "you shoulda done it when you were younger with someone your age". But, after seeing post after post about families torn apart because one or both parents decided they didn't get enough "me" time, I knew I had done the right thing.. I am fairly domesticated. My life has been for better or worse, a bachelor party. But now the want to settle down is seen as boring and predictable. Even by those with kids already.

I have found ten years is about perfect (younger that is). Still have some similar experiences/references and single and childless. Has her career started and a path at least considered. Usually has had at least one serious relationship.
Older can be fun but with if you have family aspirations, you're really limited.
 whole 9 yards
Joined: 6/6/2006
Msg: 245 (view)
Why are men so angry??? Is this true?
Posted: 3/22/2011 11:34:01 AM

I saw a T-Shirt in Atlantic City, in one of stores on the Boardwalk that has only tees w/ koo-koo/funny said "I have the pu$$y, so I make the rules.

Wow, I didn't realize the Cliff notes on modern feminism had been released yet.
 whole 9 yards
Joined: 6/6/2006
Msg: 236 (view)
Why do older men have dirty minds?
Posted: 3/16/2011 2:05:32 PM
Mind didn't get any dirtier. I just got older.

And learned how to ask nicely for things...........
 whole 9 yards
Joined: 6/6/2006
Msg: 31 (view)
Long term in your 30's with a 20 yr old...
Posted: 3/16/2011 2:02:41 PM

Of course you do, because she don't know any better

yes. She won't know any better.

Which is great. Because then you don't have to do time for her 15-20 years of shytty choices in men.
 whole 9 yards
Joined: 6/6/2006
Msg: 334 (view)
How important is it for your partner to be physically fit or in shape
Posted: 3/11/2011 2:55:26 PM
For me, nothing has kept my partners in shape more than me being in beach shape 24-7.
They know that there's no ramp up, get in shape period.

Dump me? I'm ready to be on the market again in 5 minutes.

Honestly, I do it for myself. but the side benefits sure don't hurt.
 whole 9 yards
Joined: 6/6/2006
Msg: 105 (view)
Russian women with US citizenship
Posted: 3/11/2011 2:52:14 PM
I'm gonna shoot straight with you.

If I am getting to enjoy the fruits of a nice slender, conniving russian woman I say "yep".

The key is to understand the game they are playing and play it right back.
Show that you have money, but don't give it to her.
Plus, it's so much cooler to be f*cked over by a Natasha or Svetlana than say, Jenny from the block.
 whole 9 yards
Joined: 6/6/2006
Msg: 467 (view)
Posted: 3/11/2011 1:21:57 PM
Why is it a belief that women lie about how many men they have slept with? I have always been honest about it. I slept with 2 men one being my ex husband then after my divorce waited over two years before having a drunken one night stand. I then slept with 2 more guys in the same year hoping to develop a relationship. I decided after that I was going to be certain I was in love and in an exclusive relationship before sleeping with any one else. I also asked my SO how many women he had slept with. So I've slept with 6 men, no adding or subtracting to get to the truth.

YOU may be honest, but there are many women who aren't.
There are many reasons why. Caught between old and new morality? Peeks and valleys of self esteem? But most men are simply insecure and can't handle the truth, that their woman, in nearly 99% of the cases, can go out and get sex within 10 minutes if she really wanted to (throw morality, std's out the window for a second, we'll get back to them).
She can very easily do what most men have to really work at: getting laid. (and in many ways built their self esteem on. Yes, sad but true)
I think it is hard for men to wrap their heads around the fact that a woman can get, so easily, what they(men ) want so badly, yet don't act upon it?
And it's tough to rectify for the male mind the Madonna/whore situation. I know when I get exclusive, I have elevated the woman in my opinion. (not a pedestal, but I think she's just a lil more special in mind). So it's tough to imagine her as anything but "my angel".
But a high number can conjure thoughts of the Houston 500(google it), and no one wants to think of their "angel" in that context. Why did 100 guys pump and dump "my angel".

It's immature but it is the way I think most guys are wired. And for many of us of dating age, society reinforced the man=stud, woman=slut. That's how we grew up.

This is one of those issues where the acknowledgment of the double standard can go a long way.

But really ladies, do you really want to know how many? What will you think of the guy?
Whatta stud? Ewwww, better get tested? Oh god, I have to train another puppy?

Most guys?
I think you could cut their number in half.
So in an effort to keep a guy she likes, make herself look better and not threaten him a little creative math gets involved.
I'm honest about it, if asked. If not, its fairly obvious that this ain't my first rodeo.
And when a woman shows you a new trick, well, she didn't learn THAT in cosmo!
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