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 Author Thread: When the person you like is still online
 cwisme
Joined: 6/13/2010
Msg: 30 (view)
 
When the person you like is still online
Posted: 7/6/2014 9:29:17 PM
...unrequited love, or even LIKE for that matter, is not a new concept, acknowledge and move on, respectfully...
 cwisme
Joined: 6/13/2010
Msg: 72 (view)
 
my boyfriend is cheating on me...should I end it?
Posted: 7/4/2014 10:25:25 AM
...and I'm sure his denial went something like this-"who you gonna believe, me, or your lyin' eyes?"...
 cwisme
Joined: 6/13/2010
Msg: 38 (view)
 
my boyfriend is cheating on me...should I end it?
Posted: 7/2/2014 2:21:27 PM
...ok, so let me get this straight, you're willing to put up with infidelity just to have an attractive boyfriend?, and I use the boyfriend term very loosely since how much of a boyfriend is he if he's sleeping with other women? Is your self esteem really that low?...
 cwisme
Joined: 6/13/2010
Msg: 37 (view)
 
Being late for a date
Posted: 11/16/2013 9:31:02 AM
If the worst thing you can say about your date is that she(or he) is tardy, even perpetually, you're way ahead of the game. And in this instance they were considerate enough to call ahead to inform you they'd be late. I'd say dwell on something else, but only you know your tolerances.
 cwisme
Joined: 6/13/2010
Msg: 117 (view)
 
this ladies, is how good guys become jerks
Posted: 8/24/2013 10:23:49 AM
Nice guys don't morph into creeps, they were always creeps masquerading as nice guys. While we all wear a mask to a certain extent, how true we really are to that mask will come out eventually.
 cwisme
Joined: 6/13/2010
Msg: 66 (view)
 
Walkouts. What to do? Have they happened to you?
Posted: 8/19/2013 10:05:20 AM

I consider people who majorly misrepresent their age or appearance, to be dishonest---and don't wish to be in the company of a liar.


Aside from someone not looking quite like their picture, up close and personal, even though said picture(s) is current, misrepresentation of any sort would qualify as grounds for ending the date early as well, but again that should be clearly stated as the reason for the early ending.
 cwisme
Joined: 6/13/2010
Msg: 46 (view)
 
Are my suspicions/jealousy crazy?
Posted: 8/17/2013 9:12:33 AM
In a nutshell it's your doubts that are pushing him away and for good reason, it's called instinct. Listen to your doubts, they'll always serve you well, always.
 cwisme
Joined: 6/13/2010
Msg: 45 (view)
 
Walkouts. What to do? Have they happened to you?
Posted: 8/17/2013 9:00:05 AM
Unless someone is being rude, obnoxious, or threatening, I can think of no reason to just walk out on a date.
If nothing is clicking it's easy enough to keep things brief and light. How difficult is it to be polite and continue even if the realization is there that nothing more will come of it. That's all part of the dating process. And if there were any of the conditions present that I mentioned previously, the walkout should be plainly stated as a justifiable response to such behavior.
 cwisme
Joined: 6/13/2010
Msg: 11 (view)
 
Can a person marry to soon?
Posted: 8/17/2013 8:30:00 AM
Sounds to me like you got married for all the right reasons. And you could be with someone for many years and still not really "know" them. In this life we make personal relationship decisions that are in our own best interest, as it should be, and let the proverbial chips fall where they may. If your daughter refuses to come around that's unfortunate, but her issue. Maybe time will work for her when she realizes it's working for you. Be happy.
 cwisme
Joined: 6/13/2010
Msg: 5 (view)
 
Does he really love me and does he want to commit to me???
Posted: 3/21/2013 9:48:58 PM
I agree with the post above in questioning your logic for wanting to continue a relationship with someone who consistently pushes your buttons just for the sport of it. That alone doesn't sound like something a guy that loves you would do.
 cwisme
Joined: 6/13/2010
Msg: 8 (view)
 
Should I just end it?
Posted: 3/3/2013 9:59:18 AM
Being stood up once is one thing, but if a pattern of this type of behavior develops, that's quite another. If he was truly interested in develping anything of a romantic nature with you he would follow through on any committment, irrespective of his allegedly demanding schedule. What he may be getting out of this is academic, the real issue is what you're getting out of this, and in this case it doesn't sound like much more than ever increasing aggravation.
 cwisme
Joined: 6/13/2010
Msg: 27 (view)
 
Exclusive on the first date?
Posted: 3/3/2013 9:32:11 AM
I don't think the exclusivity after just 2 meetings is an issue since everyone moves at their own pace. You got caught up in the euphoria of the moment and agreed, but now you're getting more of a feel for what this particular individual is like and your comfort level with this arrangement is waning, and that's equally understandable. The constant need for some type of affirmation from him is pause for thought. If you're feeling smothered already, some change in the dynamic may be necessary, up to and including ending it.
 cwisme
Joined: 6/13/2010
Msg: 31 (view)
 
What To Do If You Are Ever Stood Up...........
Posted: 3/2/2013 1:43:56 PM
Sure, poke the dragon, that always turns out well. Why on earth you'd ever even think of anatagonizing someone who's already exhibited a total lack of sincerity and common courtesy is way beyond me. If you get stood up, acknowledge and move on. Simple.
 cwisme
Joined: 6/13/2010
Msg: 35 (view)
 
Made me feel guilty for his flakiness
Posted: 2/21/2013 8:57:57 PM
I think you should take him up on his offer and ditch him...once...permanently...
 cwisme
Joined: 6/13/2010
Msg: 25 (view)
 
Guys especially: is he having an emotional affair with me?
Posted: 2/21/2013 12:23:05 PM
I think you need to realize that you can have none of the above with this man. He's shown himself to be someone who doesn't value you as a first priority in his life, and would you really feel the need to talk your game to get him to feel differently? As far as friendship goes, would you want to be friends with someone so quick to prey on your emotions? You are the one truly expressing the deeper sentiment in this situation, yet you continue to hedge. And with all due respect, don't feel bad for his girlfriend, she may eventually figure it out, save the pity, because if you continue this path, you'll need it for yourself.
 cwisme
Joined: 6/13/2010
Msg: 23 (view)
 
always trying to please.... I'm a sucker? when do you stop trying?
Posted: 2/11/2013 12:06:51 PM
I think the better course of action is just to accept things as they are, rather than dwelling on the hope of what they may be. No man pushes away a woman he truly desires, no man. Any excuse to the contrary is disingenuous on his part and extreme naivete on hers.
 cwisme
Joined: 6/13/2010
Msg: 40 (view)
 
why turn someone you can have into one you cant?
Posted: 1/30/2013 10:59:38 AM
No man will keep his distance from a woman he truly loves, NO man, and to the extent that there are degrees of love, that would depend on the object of said affection.
 cwisme
Joined: 6/13/2010
Msg: 39 (view)
 
Is this a normal “cooling off” period or silent treatment/emotional abuse/manipulation?
Posted: 1/30/2013 10:04:04 AM
Maybe I'm in the minority here, but I like to keep things simple. You invited him to the event, therefore it's important to you, you don't really need to communicate the degree of that importance with a neon sign. And while I can understand the queries about the logistics of a Sunday night, if YOU'RE important to him, he would make the necessary accommodations, not wait until the last minute to denigrate the affair, and then try to turn it back on you. If you're truly in a committed relationship, things should go as follows: IT'S important to you, YOU'RE important to me, IT'S important to me, notwithstanding the level of that importance, important nonetheless.
 cwisme
Joined: 6/13/2010
Msg: 30 (view)
 
Am I blowing it out of proportion?
Posted: 1/26/2013 9:57:16 PM
Sorry, but in my world one sketchy excuse is one too many. Trust your instinct, things have changed for a reason, and for you, his resulting behavior is not a positive.
 cwisme
Joined: 6/13/2010
Msg: 35 (view)
 
What to do when boyfriend wants to be with family on holidays and not you.
Posted: 12/25/2012 8:22:20 PM
He accepts you. His family does not. He continues to attend family functions without you. He does not accept you. Very simple...
 cwisme
Joined: 6/13/2010
Msg: 16 (view)
 
No Affection
Posted: 8/14/2012 7:47:34 AM
The question I would have is, how did it progress to the bedroom when there was no affection outside the bedroom?
 cwisme
Joined: 6/13/2010
Msg: 14 (view)
 
I read this somwhere and thought I'd share
Posted: 8/12/2012 10:30:17 PM
The simple answer is those individuals that focus mainly on looks should date like minded individuals, and those that are left should mingle amongst themselves. We all have selection criteria, looks usually being just one.
 cwisme
Joined: 6/13/2010
Msg: 18 (view)
 
why is it so one sided ?
Posted: 8/6/2012 4:07:44 PM
I guess you need to ask yourself if you're willing to invest any more time with someone who won't give you the benefit of the doubt and jumps to negative conclusions so quickly, as well as living a somewhat double standard.
 cwisme
Joined: 6/13/2010
Msg: 25 (view)
 
ignoring texting game
Posted: 8/6/2012 8:59:25 AM
I think this has less to do with the texting and is more about the communication pattern. It's changed, and changed for a reason. Talk to him, if the dynamic of your relationship has also changed, you'll know that weekend away he just took was a catalyst for something.
 cwisme
Joined: 6/13/2010
Msg: 55 (view)
 
He flaked on our date...forgivable or not
Posted: 6/12/2012 10:14:29 AM
I always find it incredulous that women seem to continually rationalize poor behavior on the part of men they like. He flaked on you and there's no excuse for it, unless there is, and none was given. You called him on it by putting him off which you had every right to do. Something happened that night and the only part that you played was that of collateral damage. What makes you think that's ever acceptable? You want him to be who he's not and your lamenting that fact now. Read the tea leaves, he's just not that into you.
 cwisme
Joined: 6/13/2010
Msg: 219 (view)
 
He brought his Fanny with him...
Posted: 6/9/2012 10:16:28 PM
C'mon people let's get real. If you really want to distill it, the whole dating selection process can be considered shallow. We like what we like and take it from there. Are we supposed to date ad infinitum just to prove we've given every possible candidate a thorough 'vetting' process, just to get beyond the obvious turn offs? Everything we do says something about us and that includes fashion (mis)statements. My vote is with the OP.
 cwisme
Joined: 6/13/2010
Msg: 36 (view)
 
Staying on POF when in a relationship
Posted: 3/21/2012 11:38:36 AM
Having read a few of the answers on here, I don't understand why some want to complicate it so. What does it matter the who, what , when or why of the situation? She agreed, he agreed. Do what you say, say what you do, reiterate the KISS system.

There, I feel better now.
 
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