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 Author Thread: Clues that he's an online player ..
 bj234
Joined: 9/3/2006
Msg: 183 (view)
 
Clues that he's an online player ..
Posted: 7/4/2007 4:52:06 PM
Hi,
Players are not just online, they do it offline, too. This is mostly men--I do not know women who act this way. What should we think is going on with these guys? Do they have a problem that needs attention first, are they afraid of perhaps actually finding someone thay like after all so the chase would be over, or is it just manners?

Several really cool and not näive women, not online, have just had men "disappear." All after "seriouser and seriouser" interest, pushed by the men. The women wonder,wait and worry about possible misunderstanding and will not be rude, so the offenders get breaks. Sorry this is happening to lots of people.

By the way, a VERY smart thing to do is to use an untraceable phone number overlay even on your cell phone like TalkPlus when you think you should. You can choose numbers even with different area codes that rings on your own cell, but caller only sees the alternate number. They are not expensive. S0me phone services also include this. This is not an ad or an endorsement, but it can help.

Be careful out there, and truly follow your instincts. Don't ever be scared of a guy, and better to go slow than to wish you had.
Good luck.
 bj234
Joined: 9/3/2006
Msg: 1 (view)
 
How soon to meet?
Posted: 6/12/2007 4:56:30 AM
I am fairly new to this. Someone on POF says he wants to meet me soon in safe place. Total of 4 brief emails each so far, less than week. Very little specific info, but what there is looks great and nothing sounds flaky. Love his picture and profile, no bad or ?? vibes. Have not even sent a picture to him yet. Has not asked for my phone or personal info or otherwise set off any alarms.

If we were at party or = would probably be talking etc with no qualm. Is it different here? We are both 50+. Other people I met with from here were after several weeks of messaging with lots more info. Yes I have screened out people who were not good matches,and no, I am not desperate. I have other friends, this guy just sounds like good to me. Everyone says in general don't meet too soon and get lots of info first. What is a minimum for info or time, or should I wing it once and see?
 bj234
Joined: 9/3/2006
Msg: 9 (view)
 
urgent situation
Posted: 2/26/2007 5:18:57 PM
Seir and others have good advice.

Was similar for after 3 years when my e-husband got back to serious dating. He is marrying a a friend of mine but this first really serious romance of his surprisingly drove me crazy at first long after I was sure we had both moved on. I did talk to him once to ask about getting back together because I never asked for that when he wanted out- I was more like ok if you don;'t want to be here you've got it (although we did spend many $$$$ for couples therapy first). It was good to have closure and good to have told him, even though it doesn't change the final outcome. I am more calm and you will be too. BYW there aere some wonderful sites out there or helping divorced people with these-- although you are not actually divorced, many opf the feeling s are the same. Find divorce care.com. For free, and seeming no strings, they will send you a useful email every day that really helps with all the things like anger and sadness and loneliness that go with breaking up.

And good luck ---you sound like a caring person and you will find the right person

B
 
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