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 Author Thread: Why is my ex girlfriend behaving like this?
 ilovehowiecarr
Joined: 3/18/2011
Msg: 37 (view)
 
Why is my ex girlfriend behaving like this?
Posted: 9/5/2011 10:58:31 PM
der, she's your ex and wants to be your ex. she's trying to not lead you on. move on.
 ilovehowiecarr
Joined: 3/18/2011
Msg: 13 (view)
 
Deep sleep nude photo shoot
Posted: 9/5/2011 10:56:06 PM
lol you want to break up but you also want this creep to come over & show you something? something isn't right here
 ilovehowiecarr
Joined: 3/18/2011
Msg: 11 (view)
 
Should I text or wait?
Posted: 9/5/2011 10:53:01 PM
why is everyone complaining about texts? texting is fun and easy. You should text girls. don't call, because if she's busy, she wont answer anyway. she can answer a text at her own leisure. but don't wait for her to text, guys who do that are lame. you have to pursue a girl, but this one isn't worth it. why are you stressing about some chick who obviously either has a BF or isn't attracted to you?
 ilovehowiecarr
Joined: 3/18/2011
Msg: 18 (view)
 
Why wouldn't she answer Phone
Posted: 9/5/2011 9:24:59 AM
she was probably drunk when you met, and now realizes she doesn't like you. move on.
 ilovehowiecarr
Joined: 3/18/2011
Msg: 18 (view)
 
Where to begin ..
Posted: 9/5/2011 9:21:04 AM
kids are just baggage. don't lead with that. i can't even count how many guys bla bla bla about how much they love their kids, take care of them, etc. it's you're job to love your kids and take care of them, you don't deserve a medal for it. guys must think women find it attractive when guys like kids, and yes, it shows a person has a good heart when they like other people's kids, but you're supposed to like your own kids. you probably shouldn't mention your divorce or past relationship either. basically don't say what you just said, at least until you've been on a few dates.
 ilovehowiecarr
Joined: 3/18/2011
Msg: 11 (view)
 
Question
Posted: 9/5/2011 9:13:29 AM
i think you're exaggerating. you're probably the really jealous type. There's no way this girl is getting wasted and grabbing crotch or anything. she's just a touchy feely person when she lets her hair down, and you can't handle it. stop taking her calls and returning her messages, duh. it's not that hard.

god, i am so sick of people in here posting these cry baby stories about how some awesome person is pursuing them. that's something most people would want, not whine about.
 ilovehowiecarr
Joined: 3/18/2011
Msg: 17 (view)
 
Need help with an older woman.
Posted: 9/5/2011 9:08:15 AM
four years isn't much of an age gap. she has a boyfriend, and she's only telling you the bad things about him. you're in the friend zone. at best, she might sleep with you to make her BF mad. that's all you're gonna get from her. she has no respect for you.
 ilovehowiecarr
Joined: 3/18/2011
Msg: 19 (view)
 
Mid Life Crisis
Posted: 9/5/2011 9:02:59 AM
i agree with lint spotter.

boohoo, you're getting older. everything is an excuse these days, everyone has some sort of "disorder" or trauma to make them behave the way they do, with no consequences. people only do what they want to do. there's no other reason for why they do what they do. even in prison, people only eat/sleep etc because they want to. no one does anything they don't want to do, but they rarely want to take responsibility for it.
 ilovehowiecarr
Joined: 3/18/2011
Msg: 10 (view)
 
I need some good advice
Posted: 9/5/2011 8:58:27 AM
dump her. she's making you look like a fool. I can't believe you ditched a good friend for this jerk. who cares if she's cheating or not? do you *really* want to know? I doubt it. just dump her.
 ilovehowiecarr
Joined: 3/18/2011
Msg: 49 (view)
 
He still has his profile up??! Mixed messages *sigh*
Posted: 9/5/2011 8:39:58 AM
he's not sending mixed messages. his message is pretty clear. you have a hearing problem.
 ilovehowiecarr
Joined: 3/18/2011
Msg: 25 (view)
 
On POF under false pretence
Posted: 8/31/2011 10:28:56 AM
you're being pretty judgmental considering you had sex with a total stranger and use the excuse that you "needed" it after 3 months of no sex. 3 months? seriously? that's a long time for you? you sound like you get around more than he does. at least he told you the truth, and the other truth he's probably too nice to tell you is that he IS looking for long term, just not with YOU.
 ilovehowiecarr
Joined: 3/18/2011
Msg: 53 (view)
 
Concealed weapon on a first date?
Posted: 8/31/2011 10:15:32 AM
that's hot. unless she grabs it and kills you. you could just leave it in the car, right? do you absolutely have to wear it on your physical person the entire date? lots of people here have C&Cs but that doesn't mean they always carry. it's up to you, you run the risk of freaking the girl out or getting an earful of anti-gun lectures, but at least you'll know where she stands. personally i would not be bothered by it.
 ilovehowiecarr
Joined: 3/18/2011
Msg: 63 (view)
 
Met a great girl.....but she's on chat 12 hours a day.
Posted: 8/29/2011 2:34:36 PM
lol.... I had an ex who would pull this crazy paranoia over chat. We ended up breaking up over it, which sucked, because he was hot & smart. He got jealous over me talking to a guy I've chatted with for 10 years and met in person when my car broke down, he drove me around to work and stuff. It wasn't sexual at all, we were like siblings. Sometimes if you're on voice chat or involved in a heated discussion, you might not respond to text messages and pms as quickly as you normally would. Just because she's in chat doesn't mean she's showing her goodies to everyone. And so what if she was? Maybe she's an exhibitionist and you could make beautiful movies together. If she says she misses you, then she probably does. The big red flag here is her not having a place to stay, and she might be using you for that. I don't see a problem with the chat addiction at all. The problem is whether or not she wants to use you as a place to stay then ditch you when she finds someone else (more likely in "real" life than chat) and break your heart.
 ilovehowiecarr
Joined: 3/18/2011
Msg: 22 (view)
 
Dating vs. Long Term on pof?
Posted: 8/29/2011 2:24:45 PM
If they're gonna be liars, they will say "long term" but really be looking for just sex. You should relax about their status and just figure out if you like the guy.
 ilovehowiecarr
Joined: 3/18/2011
Msg: 22 (view)
 
I am some what new.
Posted: 8/29/2011 2:04:06 PM
Yes, they are unfounded. Meeting people online is no more dangerous than dating a co worker or someone you meet at a club. Meet in safe, public locations, if the guy seems like a creep, don't get into his car. Most violent crimes (where I live) are domestic crimes, so you're much more likely to be raped/murdered by your BF or husband than some guy you met online. Just a tip though, if the guy seems super-nice and too good to be true, then he probably is. Those are the real weirdos, the ones who act nice all the time. BUT if the guy got offended by you being safety concious, then he might be a weirdo. Most guys would understand where you're coming from, and would try to help you feel more comfortable.
 ilovehowiecarr
Joined: 3/18/2011
Msg: 13 (view)
 
Should I have asked her if we were going as a date or as friends?
Posted: 8/29/2011 1:59:53 PM
lol you turned her into a lesbian
just kidding
why would she have to tell you all her most intimate secrets, like her questioning her sexuality? you sure expect a lot from a dang movie date. get over it. people don't usually tell each other everything they're thinking and feeling, and expecting such is setting you up for constant disappointment.
 ilovehowiecarr
Joined: 3/18/2011
Msg: 208 (view)
 
50% of women don't want children?
Posted: 8/29/2011 1:54:12 PM
If all you want is a baby maker, your chances of finding a girl are more slim than you think. Why do all you men want kids anyway? Kids are a huge pain in the butt, they cost a lot of money, and most of you men don't even help take care of them. No wonder women don't want kids, or men who want kids. Men are always like, yea it would be fun to play catch with my son! But you don't change diapers, you don't get up in the middle of the night, you don't prepare lunches or go grocery shopping period, and if you have to watch your own kid alone at night you consider it "babysitting". Most of the guys with kids on this site see them once or twice a month. It's not hard to lose confidence in the abilty of the modern male to handle parenthood.
 ilovehowiecarr
Joined: 3/18/2011
Msg: 51 (view)
 
First Date Men buying my meal or drinks
Posted: 8/29/2011 1:48:32 PM
men should always pay, no matter what. Guys are getting cheap & lazy. They want to show off their cars and huge TVs and they want endless BJs but then expect us to offer to split the bill? F that.
 ilovehowiecarr
Joined: 3/18/2011
Msg: 44 (view)
 
If a woman tells another man besides her own she loves him whats the chances she slept with him?
Posted: 8/29/2011 1:41:53 PM
yes, and maybe maury will get you a paternity test.
 ilovehowiecarr
Joined: 3/18/2011
Msg: 55 (view)
 
is it cheating
Posted: 8/29/2011 1:39:25 PM
I don't know, is looking at porn alone cheating? It depends on how your "friend" feels about it. If she doesn't like it, she should dump him and find someone else. Why waste time being unhappy and hoping the guy will change? He won't.
 ilovehowiecarr
Joined: 3/18/2011
Msg: 76 (view)
 
Physically abused for the first time
Posted: 8/29/2011 1:22:57 PM
oh boohoo. he made one mistake. that's nothing. some girls end up in hospitals because of loser guys who have none of the good qualities you mentioned. some people just can't handle alcohol, and if he's willing to get help, you should give him a chance.
 ilovehowiecarr
Joined: 3/18/2011
Msg: 31 (view)
 
Whats the gain.
Posted: 8/29/2011 1:18:29 PM
they're miserable people who like to create drama? you need better friends? who knows, who cares
 ilovehowiecarr
Joined: 3/18/2011
Msg: 15 (view)
 
how do I know when to walk away? I cant make sense.
Posted: 8/29/2011 1:16:08 PM
why would want this loser back. he sounds like a total D-bag. I doubt he's miserable at all. He has you still in love with him and his freedom to bang anyone else, too. Does that make you happy? If it does, you need therapy.
 ilovehowiecarr
Joined: 3/18/2011
Msg: 9 (view)
 
Broken up but still in love
Posted: 8/29/2011 1:11:44 PM
you should tell him. if you don't, you'll always wonder about it. if he says F you, you dumped me! then at least you have an answer. and stop looking at old videos! you'll end up crying and then your eyes will be all puffy and red. not a good look for anyone
 ilovehowiecarr
Joined: 3/18/2011
Msg: 17 (view)
 
I don't know what to do...
Posted: 8/28/2011 9:06:44 AM
She'll be back for vacations and summers and stuff right? Plus air travel is really cheap. An 8 hour car trip is like 2 hours by plane, if that. You can at least give it a shot, and if it doesn't work then it doesn't, but you won't know until you try. It sounds like you want to give up before you even give it any effort. You'll end up regretting that.
 ilovehowiecarr
Joined: 3/18/2011
Msg: 16 (view)
 
Should I take her back?
Posted: 8/28/2011 8:58:24 AM
OK I don't want to be preachy but you asked, so do not get back together with this train wreck, she is a huge liablity for your own sense of wellbeing. I'd be concerned for your kids too, if she's got a string of men coming & going, and confusing the kids with hopes of you getting back together. You gotta be the adult here and set the right example. Good people do not get back together with lying, cheating, slutty jerks, and your kids need to know that. Being civil to her for the kids' sake is totally different from still being in love with her & hoping for a reunion. You know how this story ends. I assume you have shared custody, so use your free time to develop your own interests that have nothing to do with her.
 ilovehowiecarr
Joined: 3/18/2011
Msg: 44 (view)
 
what are some of the times you most miss a relationship-not the obvious ones
Posted: 8/28/2011 8:47:05 AM
I just miss being with someone who has the same sense of humor. We both know what the other is thinking and laugh at the same things at the exact same time. That's what I miss the most. That's probably the biggest problem I have on dates. I will find something I see to be really funny, and the guy I'm with just has a DUH look on his face. Really makes me miss my ex.
 ilovehowiecarr
Joined: 3/18/2011
Msg: 100 (view)
 
Is it inevitable that the passion, intimacy, hot sex fades over time? and if so, what's the solution
Posted: 8/28/2011 8:44:26 AM
No it is not inevitable, people just get lazy and take each other for granted, but it doesn't have to be that way.
 ilovehowiecarr
Joined: 3/18/2011
Msg: 427 (view)
 
The Dog or the Girl?
Posted: 8/28/2011 8:43:24 AM
WTF do you mean by "For you guys reading this hes a lab and is a duck/dove retriever so you know what I mean when I say well trained" lmao!!! You think girls don't know about dogs? The fact that THREE women had a problem with your dog says there is something you're not telling us. Most chicks love animals, so something is wrong here and you're not being honest, or the chicks found you to be a sexist self absorbed pig and just used the dog as an excuse to get you to break up with them and keep your ego intact.
 ilovehowiecarr
Joined: 3/18/2011
Msg: 19 (view)
 
What to say and how to say it?
Posted: 8/28/2011 8:39:49 AM
if it just happened once, what's the big deal. Don't get all paranoid like this is a rerun of old relationships. If it keeps happening, then speak up, but for now I wouldn't say anything because that will just make him perform even worse.
 ilovehowiecarr
Joined: 3/18/2011
Msg: 37 (view)
 
Did I deserve to be treated the way I have!!!
Posted: 8/28/2011 8:37:29 AM
Wow. You don't take any responsibility for choosing men in a bad life situation, you just blame them. I say you deserve every bit of tragedy coming your way, and it will, because both those guys are as messed up as you seem to be. I don't know why any guy would date you. You're the "its never my fault" type of chick. Now you're advertising your boyfriend's mental health issues online? what the hell mental illness are YOU suffering from? You are the kinda girl making us all look bad.
 ilovehowiecarr
Joined: 3/18/2011
Msg: 10 (view)
 
Too much or not enough
Posted: 8/28/2011 8:32:33 AM
text or call once or twice and if she doesn't respond, dont keep doing it. She'll let you know when she's not busy.
 ilovehowiecarr
Joined: 3/18/2011
Msg: 125 (view)
 
Do I have the right to be angry about this?
Posted: 8/28/2011 8:29:07 AM
Um yea, psycho alert.

She's not your wife, dude. You're barely even considered "dating" at this point.

Your reaction is nuts. You think because you took her on a great date that she should be stalked online and then "confronted" by you? Get over yourself.
 ilovehowiecarr
Joined: 3/18/2011
Msg: 15 (view)
 
socially awkward?
Posted: 8/28/2011 8:22:57 AM
She probably just didn't like the way you looked or smelled or something, and I'm sure that made you uneasy. If she liked you, she would have been able to draw you out of your shell even if you were socially awkward, but she didn't, and then she blamed you. F her
 ilovehowiecarr
Joined: 3/18/2011
Msg: 19 (view)
 
Wrong Chemistry
Posted: 8/28/2011 8:19:32 AM
I'm not sure what you mean by "chemistry"
If you mean like, fireworks exploding type stuff, then yea I would keep dating a guy even if that were absent, but if he's ugly, stupid, a liar, whatever then no, I wouldn't feel right about it.
 ilovehowiecarr
Joined: 3/18/2011
Msg: 11 (view)
 
Going for the number.
Posted: 8/28/2011 8:17:03 AM
It does bother me when guys give me their number right away and ask me to text them. That's the equivilant of asking for my number right away. I don't really care if it's "easier" for you to text. I don't want to give a total stranger a portal to my bedroom 24/7. It's creepy. Some guys don't know when to stop messaging and I can only imagine, based on the dozens of pms i keep getting from a couple of guys I have long since stopped responding to, how my phone would be buzzing every 15 seconds if they had my cell number. Stop being lazy and put some more effort into your pms before doing the phone number thing.
 ilovehowiecarr
Joined: 3/18/2011
Msg: 15 (view)
 
Is it wise to talk about your good points in a first message?
Posted: 8/28/2011 8:12:44 AM
Why wouldn't you just put that information in your profile? In a first message you should definitely ask questions other than "how are you?" because that's a dead end response you'll get. Don't ask questions that require a one word answer like yes, no, fine, that sort of thing. Ask questions based on what you read in her profile. If you need help with this, ask anyone you know in sales. Or you can pm me if you want but don't say "hey can i ask you a question?" because i will teach you a lesson and say NO lol
 ilovehowiecarr
Joined: 3/18/2011
Msg: 15 (view)
 
The first phone call.
Posted: 8/26/2011 8:02:03 PM
I don't really like talking on the phone either. It's pretty common. Just call her and ask her if she wants to see you this weekendhave a plan in mind, movie, dinner, whatever you want to do, and ask her if she wants to go with you. Then you can hang up. I doubt she gave you her number so you could gab on the phone for hours; she wants you to ask her out.
 ilovehowiecarr
Joined: 3/18/2011
Msg: 332 (view)
 
Is Fox News Evil or Stupid?
Posted: 8/25/2011 1:18:06 PM
illogical question, false dichotemy. Try reading some books.
 ilovehowiecarr
Joined: 3/18/2011
Msg: 27 (view)
 
He will not take me off his contacts - Am I SOL? (Long)
Posted: 8/25/2011 1:15:46 PM
If you tell him you do not want him to contact you and he still does it, you can get a protection from harassment order or maybe the cops will just be nice and call him for you and tell him to leave you alone. That usually works. I'm sure the laws are different everywhere, but if you talk to your local public safety office, they should be able to help you. You also might try calling his service provider, if there's evidence like you say of him doing this other people, his SP may not take to kindly to being part of a creep scheme.
 ilovehowiecarr
Joined: 3/18/2011
Msg: 57 (view)
 
Loud walking upstairs neighbour *Help*
Posted: 8/25/2011 1:09:26 PM
ask your landlord if you can sound proof the ceiling, he/she might even split the cost with you, since it will be a problem for future renters also. Other than that, all you can do is maybe leave the tv or radio on or a loud fan when you're trying to sleep. You can't ask them to stop walking around. If it's affecting your life this much you might want to move or try some relaxation techniques. You seem quite uptight.
 ilovehowiecarr
Joined: 3/18/2011
Msg: 27 (view)
 
New to online dating, does this mean I'm overreacting.
Posted: 8/25/2011 1:06:18 PM
it might be "normal" but it's not healthy. trust your instincts, this guy is a weirdo.
 ilovehowiecarr
Joined: 3/18/2011
Msg: 18 (view)
 
Lost and ready to quit.
Posted: 8/25/2011 12:40:10 PM
I think you guys are being too hard on him.
At least he's being honest and not pretending he wants a relationship when he doesn't.
 ilovehowiecarr
Joined: 3/18/2011
Msg: 14 (view)
 
Why do women say they want,but don't have the time???
Posted: 8/25/2011 12:36:05 PM
If they wanted to get to know you, they would. Mystery solved.
 ilovehowiecarr
Joined: 3/18/2011
Msg: 13 (view)
 
Two questions
Posted: 8/25/2011 12:34:57 PM
I don't think being OCD has anything to do with it. I agree with the boundaries thing that someone else said. There's nothing more annoying than a guy you casually date constantly texting or calling. I'm sure she knows you still have her DVDs and she will get in touch with you when she's ready. For now, give her some space.
 ilovehowiecarr
Joined: 3/18/2011
Msg: 11 (view)
 
Blocked by a chatty Friend!
Posted: 8/25/2011 12:28:44 PM
Yes that would be rude & awkward. Maybe she just likes her job and is friendly. It's not fair to put her on the spot where she works. She can't leave or not come back there if she's made uncomfortable by your proposition. If you go there that often, it looks more like stalking than a potential date. Unless you're prepared to be rejected and never go back there, I would leave this one alone.
 ilovehowiecarr
Joined: 3/18/2011
Msg: 18 (view)
 
Approaching someone in public services??
Posted: 8/25/2011 12:24:57 PM
that's actually a good idea, to leave your number with the receptionist, that way if she's not interested, you haven't put her on the spot or made her feel awkward a work. Go for it.
 ilovehowiecarr
Joined: 3/18/2011
Msg: 18 (view)
 
Virgin Men
Posted: 8/25/2011 12:23:04 PM
I don't think you need to spring that on someone on the first date. Most girls your age won't even notice, because they're probably not very experienced either, if you ever get to that point. I don't know if you should ever tell a girl, unless she asks directly. Knowing that I am someone's first adds too much pressure. But that's up to you, obviously
 ilovehowiecarr
Joined: 3/18/2011
Msg: 48 (view)
 
women who specifically seek closeness and depth and then panic or sabotage
Posted: 8/25/2011 12:14:02 PM
Jesus if any of your communications with her were as verbose as this post, I think we found the problem. You can be intellectual without beating someone to boredom with too many words. A lot of "smart" guys have this problem, they go on and on and they think it makes them look "deep" or "intellectual" but it actually just makes you look self absorbed, as if people should be thankful to get all these awesome insights from you. People want someone to listen to them, not talk at them.
 ilovehowiecarr
Joined: 3/18/2011
Msg: 31 (view)
 
can't avoid seeing my ex
Posted: 8/25/2011 12:06:02 PM
aww sorry she broke your heart, but don't worry, you'll get through it. I see an ex from a pretty significant long term relationship (we lived together for years) and it was hard at first, but we actually became really good friends, and work well together. I just focus on the stuff I always liked about him, but nothing physical, and I don't dwell on the problems we had in the past. It's actually better now, when he does the stuff that used to drive me crazy, I can just laugh about it because we're not together anymore and it's not my problem anymore. You'll probably find the same thing happening.
 
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