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 Author Thread: Met a guy on here sort of fell for him within the first few weeks.. He got what he wanted (leg over)
 AnalisaEsto
Joined: 6/8/2011
Msg: 73 (view)
 
Met a guy on here sort of fell for him within the first few weeks.. He got what he wanted (leg over)
Posted: 3/27/2012 8:57:21 PM
I think the majority of the not so suave man will say they are looking for a relationship or at least more than just a one time thing. Some even pretend to be hurt when confronted about their intentions. In the 2-3 yrs that I have met ppl from different sites, I have come to realized that the majority of guys who recently separate from their g/f or wives behave like they want something steady but they say they are not interested in anything serious (no strings attached) but I noticed that even though they are secretly trying to mend their relationship with their supposed X, they are selfish and attempt to hold down a reserve (FWB) but under the pretense that its more than that. So that SHE is faithful to him, by feeling that there is a possibility of a real relationship.
 analisaesto
Joined: 6/8/2011
Msg: 24 (view)
 
MOUTH ODORS
Posted: 3/24/2012 3:37:20 PM
lol you guys are so funny. OMG I am very particular at having ppl sitting at my chair at work. I remember this one woman, she always smelled like ass. she was heavy and even she dressed ok, she always carried this dead fish smell around her one day she decided to make herself comfy on my chair, I was furious, got rid of the chair and got me a regular plastic chair. Two things ppl should focus on is body odors, and not for nothing, but as females, have more issues to deal with. So its our job to keep our inner and outer body fresh and clean.
 analisaesto
Joined: 6/8/2011
Msg: 23 (view)
 
MOUTH ODORS
Posted: 3/24/2012 3:30:36 PM
I love most of these comments. I honestly understand Elvis. I interview ppl everyday and some of the worst odors come from young females between 19-25. I assume that they think that because they are young and sometimes mad gorgeous/sexy that their breath is nothing to worry about. I sometimes believe its a technique to make the interview go faster than usual. I had asked one if she worked at a fish market, when she said she didnt, i asked if she lived above one. To which her answer was no, so I assume she had a dead spoiled fish in her purse. I dont think young ppl like wasting time on brushing since most of the time is for their mug. They only worry about the surface. Sorry to say, but bad breath is a deal breaker, if I cant be near you, I really cant focus on having a good time. In frankly if going further and the shit smell doesnt come out until my mouth is on his, all chemistry dies. Its like I been hit with an atomic bomb. GUM only covers the odor while its fresh, ppl have to learn to brush and that the tongue is also part of the mouth and not be ignored. Also sadly to say their are ppl with medical issues, if a person has kidney issues or ulcers or less complicated issues like dental problems, if they really want to date they should consider how their date is going to feel. Maybe they are alone so long and dates dont go for a 2nd date, because buddy the breath is kicking and nobody should have to hold their breath till they become blue or green
 analisaesto
Joined: 6/8/2011
Msg: 41 (view)
 
Trust: Do you give it freely or does one have to earn it?
Posted: 3/18/2012 11:18:46 PM
Im like you, if I trust you its from the get go. However once betrayed doubts build in for life. Never to be trusted again. Witness or no witness.
 analisaesto
Joined: 6/8/2011
Msg: 8 (view)
 
one night stands/sex on ther first date
Posted: 3/18/2012 11:14:42 PM
As a female I think she is looking for a reason to not go further with the relationship or she is highly religious and feels that by being with you after knowing what you have done she is just as bad in the eyes of God. I had been in a relationship for 26 yrs, upon discovering that the husband was having affairs with everyone he could get to **** discreetly. I realized after two years of going w/o sex, that I would find me a partner. And I did, it was hard to follow through with my plan, but when I found the right candidate, there was no turning back. Unlike most ppl, the one night went in the direction that I had planned , and ongoing FWB. When I was in my 20's I was against it, when I hit my late 40's I said, what the hell am I waiting for, a medical issue. My mojo to die out, dont use it loose it. LOL I would never advise to someone in their 20's or 30's to do a one night stand, but when up in age what are we going to wait for, a guy who wants to ask for our hand in marriage, cant hardly find a boyfriend, imagine a sexual partner. Have to get it when those lucky days come by. No negrets except a smile
 analisaesto
Joined: 6/8/2011
Msg: 40 (view)
 
Is it possible to be in a relationship and not be sexually active?
Posted: 3/18/2012 10:56:02 PM
Well like someone mention about about her parents. Idk, if my situation count? Im married and he lives in the h/h but in separate rooms, no sex in years, first by his odd behavior, than after I realized what his odd behavior was about, by my choice, slept in the same bed for a year w/o no intimacy whatsoever lol yes very nerve wrecking, he moved out on his own to the diners couch and than just moved into the computer room. lol where he still sleeps ---But if I had a real relationship I would take matters into my own hand or body lol.
 analisaesto
Joined: 6/8/2011
Msg: 482 (view)
 
Double standard on Oral?
Posted: 3/11/2012 11:07:40 PM
Not crazy about getting licked or sucked on the vagina unless I know the guy very well. However I like kissing and I just cant find myself kissing the mouth that had just been in my pool. I find that a man that eats is usually trying to make up for what he lacks in size, erection or stamina. However, I hear woman whine alot about wanting equal treatment, but they forget a vagina is always dripping fluids, a period sometime hasnt left completely and even when we douch, some heavy fluids are bound to linger inside. Also depending what we eat, our fluids tend to change in smell. Man that eat if he does well in the penetrating dept, are kinky, brave or in love. I think the best way to eat is 69 that way its enjoyable for both.
 analisaesto
Joined: 6/8/2011
Msg: 40 (view)
 
Is fooling around on a first date as bad as having sex?
Posted: 3/10/2012 12:55:00 AM
I dont believe it to be the same, if by fooling around you mean deep kissing and touching and or licking. I dont know if being 50 or having a cheating husband had made me more passive with certain situations. At my age Im not looking for someone to just have dinner or tea. I dont mind eating alone and I have my children for that as well. So yeah I am as some might say in heat. Since I cant find that one guy or since when I do find someone who I feel perfect with they are afraid of attachments and keep our concacts very lmited , assuming that by being distant none of us will be to possisive. If he seems like he is really interested and I feel a great connection, we are going to do whatever comes naturally to us. I also thnk that the age has alot to do with it, a 20 yr old having sex with every guy she meets is gong to look awkward the day she marries. But for a much older person , they dont have much to loose, they dont have as many chances of finding a sexual buddy like the younger person would. So I believe a person should go with the feeling.
 analisaesto
Joined: 6/8/2011
Msg: 30 (view)
 
The One that Got Away
Posted: 3/10/2012 12:17:57 AM
Love the Kati Peri song with Diego Luna, The one that got away. I thought about it many a times. My ex-husband's brother was into me, didnt give him a change because he never spoked to me directly and back than I had issues with age, he was younger by a couple of months. And by the time I realized it, his brother and I were already seeing each other , his brother was 10 yrs older. His brother was an alcoholic which I realized a few months into our marriage. And I realized his brothers love when during one of my ex drunk episodes, his brother confronted him and told him to get himself together if he really loved me and that he stood aside because he believed I was his brothers salvation. When his brother would get drunk he would tell my to leave him and go with his brother. His brother was a kind, handy-man, funny, smart, and a romantic person. There didnt seem anything that he coudnt do. I believed he was the one that got away. Its funny he llooked a little like Diego Luna but with a more stronger body. His hair always in his face. My marriage lasted almost 3 yrs.
 analisaesto
Joined: 6/8/2011
Msg: 19 (view)
 
Demanding strangers, who want to meet within hours, want phone numbers, etc.
Posted: 3/9/2012 11:56:29 PM
Im so glad I have been reading these blogs. I almost began to believe that maybe the issue was me. The block button sometimes can backfire. Like yourself I had guys that find me in other sites and also make other profiles, just to continue contact with me. They ask for honesty so that they dont waste their time in hope of something thats never going to happen. But when I have been honest they respond with vengeance and animosity. What I just cant understand is, with so many woman out there, why get so possisive with one profile, or are they battling with everyone that doesnt show interest. If your courteous they dont like it, if your too honest they also despise that. I believe men with those flares of anger could be dangerous in a real relationship. There should be a section for fellons(those that aggravate others verbally or in writing) a red button that flares as soon as this person contacts someone else, so that we can act with caution.
 AnalisaEsto
Joined: 6/8/2011
Msg: 145 (view)
 
He is not attractive
Posted: 3/9/2012 10:38:30 PM
I have been there a couple of times, not because of looks but bad breath. Which I think is something even more delicate to work with. I enjoy the persons company, feel comfortable around them until they try kissing me. lol Ive been told that Im shy because I dont want to kiss. So what I have said even though most guys are not looking for a buddy, some have say friend is good, but never called again. So I get the message. Others I have told that I didnt feel that strongly about them, that I didnt feel much of a chemistry between us. Some have not taken it well, some become bitter and want to unload their feelings of hurt by lashing out anything negative they can think off. good luck
 AnalisaEsto
Joined: 6/8/2011
Msg: 18 (view)
 
Would you?
Posted: 3/8/2012 10:26:15 PM
No 1 bby, you sound like me, I couldnt have said it better. there is always something to learn. even if its just how that person likes it. everyone has their own little tricks, no matter how experienced they are.
 AnalisaEsto
Joined: 6/8/2011
Msg: 17 (view)
 
Would you?
Posted: 3/8/2012 10:21:41 PM
I dont consider myself to be highly experienced, but I have been with persons that seem to have less experienced than myself, and it actually has made me more excited. I can make it more interesting w/o making the guy feel intimidated, and just by seeing the persons excitement makes it even more worthwhile.
 analisaesto
Joined: 6/8/2011
Msg: 22 (view)
 
Guys: When the ex-wife remarries...
Posted: 3/7/2012 8:11:51 PM
I dont believe things have change since I was a kid 35 yrs ago. My parents divorced when I was 11, I didnt have a relationship with my father even though I knew where to find him if I needed to. My mom never remarried and never had a bf, because she had to work as many hours possible to support my two brothers and I. I am separated from my kids father and Im sure that the moment that I were to have a guy over he would be jeolous and try to intimidate the guy, cause thats the kind of guy he is. However I seen a couple of other friends and family that have been divorced for years and due to their children they have remained as friends and the b/f or new spouse has become friends with the x. I think it makes things run more fluently. The new guy will not be intimidated by the x and so he will not have to be working so hard at prooving himself to his wife or the step kids. I also noticed that in these type of relationship the children are less stressed about feeling guilty at having a normal relationship with their mothers husband or fathers wife because it also happens vice versa. When the man has the main custody of the children. In fact I think its even more difficult for mothers because we are more bonded to this child that is now under the care of another woman. So if man think they have it bad, think about having had carried this child for 9 months to along the line because of a divorce and a Judge decision based mostly on the financial situation of each parent, the child is separated , that can be very damaging psychologically. I would recommend never to criticize the other guy to viciously kids see this and this usually works against the one doing the talking.
 analisaesto
Joined: 6/8/2011
Msg: 53 (view)
 
Approaching 50 and it's scaring the Crud outa me
Posted: 3/7/2012 1:07:37 AM
I dont know if Im a little different than most ppl I know in my age grp. I had always thought of celebrating my 50th with a big party, but it didnt happen. I never been so alone in my life as when I hit my 50th.
If I went though the midlife crisis was thanks to my unfaithful spouse of 26 yrs 5 yrs ago. The first two years I decided to just be a mother and that life as a woman was over for me. I figure who was going to be interested in a 46 yr old , older guys as you mentioned are in search to cure their EGO by playing with eternal youth to their best of their abilities, finding a much younger woman.
However, after the first two years, I began going out alone to clubs basically to be out of the house and be around music and happy ppl and I realized that I still had a chance, that guys were interested, maybe not for what I wanted but still it was something to think about. It wasnt easy. It was very hard thinking of another man when all my youth I only knew one guy as my lover. Its so hard to not compare everything from his looks to his abilities. I have not overcome it all yet, but I am learning to let go, enjoy each day, not have great expectations, see all dates as a posibility to more than just a fwb.
Its very hard to think like a man, to tell myself everytime, No attachments No strings, just have fun, enjoy for what it is, dont give it much thought or it will not work.
This is probably far from what you wanted to hear, but these are my thoughts. BTW when I regain having sex it wasnt as difficult as I thought it be, however the person that somewhat helped me ease the burden was a younger guy but close to my age, very romantic, very sexual and sensual. From their own its like getting back on a bike after many years of not riding one. All the energy and thrill comes back like it was yesterday. good luck
 AnalisaEsto
Joined: 6/8/2011
Msg: 175 (view)
 
First Date Expectations - Over 50
Posted: 3/7/2012 12:22:15 AM
I understand you perfectly. This attitude is not just the older guys. Men think that being a mature grown woman is letting them treat us like its only about them. They act like we dont have to like them, its about them liking us. They have an annoying attitude that once we're no longer a virgin, we are suppose to give up. I am so fed up about hearing the word games coming from men. They dont realize that not everyone is an excebitionist and that one big word used through most of these sites is Descreet, but once we decide to meet, they forget manners, respect and courtesy. If you choose not to kiss because their breath is kicking, they dont realize it, they assume we dont like kissing or that we cant kiss or we're playing games. Some want to see whether we have anything under our clothes worth a second date. We should start asking them, lets see what your working with.
 AnalisaEsto
Joined: 6/8/2011
Msg: 382 (view)
 
bald guys
Posted: 3/6/2012 11:46:44 PM
looking good bald has alot to do with the shape of the head, also in what form is it and is it a nice close shave. Love hair and lots of it, but some bald man make it look sexy, yul bryner like someone mentioned, or telly savalas. I prefer bald to the mullet, which is embarrasing and finding the perfect one doesnt seem to happen to often. Its like a woman with a bad weave or wig. I have been lucky the two bald heads that I dealt with, have a very nice head and they are man of alot of charisma, so they wear it well
 analisaesto
Joined: 6/8/2011
Msg: 134 (view)
 
Do Others find it harder to meet other people in their 50s?
Posted: 12/10/2011 8:52:45 PM
I was married for over 2 decades, separated 4-5 yrs.Was In my late 40's told myself that at least I wasnt 32 yrs old like when my parents divorced. The first year I didnt give it much thought, but as the 2nd year was sliding in I was becoming bittered with the depressing idea that I was never going to be with a man again. The thought of never having sex pissed me off and decided that very year that I was going out and meet someone. Easier said than done. SO I began my journey, every other wknd I would dress up, ( an ordeal, didnt want to look desperate, or have someone confuse me for something else) asked my kids for their approval. It took a awhile before I got somewhat comfortable at sitting at bars/lounge/club drinking alone. I didnt date much as a teenager, married young to the 2nd man I met. So this was not easy. Most guys that hit on me, were much younger, which basically meant they were only interested in being with someone that they wouldnt have to be to attracted to, to avoid becoming attached. Guys in need of a lover. Most younger man think that older woman are less of a risk, because they believe we are no longer in need of having children and or a relationship after being tied up for so many years. And older man or guys our age, are not really interested in us because after regaining their freedom after years of marriage, they are looking for somone younger that doesnt remind them of their X and someone that they can enjoy the crazy things an older woman will be too constricted to engage in. And yes its very hard, this is a stage where some have gained weight, loss hair fullnes, have stretch marks and dont feel very attractive in the nude or under bright light. We have to actually believe in ourselves, in order for us to show some guy that we are worth being looked at. So we have to make a bigger effort than the 30 or 40 yr olds. Oh yeah and by now we are also very choosy, I want someone that is as smart, good looking and strong as my x. It seems the ones that come close are married or just not interested in real dating.
 analisaesto
Joined: 6/8/2011
Msg: 50 (view)
 
Dating without sex?
Posted: 12/10/2011 6:59:56 PM
I think this is the smartest answer i've seen in reference to this question. We are all adults. I am 50 yrs old, I am not looking for a long term, but I have needs. I enjoy sex and at my age w/o a partner its not like i can have it everyday, so hey. Am not sorry to say, that if I am seeing a guy and we are attracted to each other sexually i will go for it. I have nothing to loose. Ten Years ago, I wouldv'e replied that three to six months is a good time to wait b4 having sex during a relationship if each live in their own place. However, in a relationship where the couple sleeps in the same bed, I dont see the logic in this, unless they are trying to test their will power, which sounds like punishment. But hey to each its own. Dating w/o sex to me is a bit difficult to understand, I am not sexy, pretty or rich for someone to continue waiting for me , It's either wait till my mojo dies out or i become unable to have sex due to illness. So use it or loose it.
 
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