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 Author Thread: would you marry for money?
 unspoiled
Joined: 9/25/2011
Msg: 757 (view)
 
would you marry for money?
Posted: 10/22/2011 9:21:56 PM
marry a guy for money and that money he uses can get another bimbo behind your back whenever you are not looking.

i bet 80% of the younger women and maybe 20% of the older ones are not being truthful here.
 unspoiled
Joined: 9/25/2011
Msg: 358 (view)
 
borderline personality disorder-any info?
Posted: 10/22/2011 8:47:56 AM
I think this "border-line" personality is a catch-all for whatever condition psychiatrists cannot pigeon-hole in some other category. It could be that society is so screwed up now that what is normal now is worldliness and one who is not worldly would be considered by the masses as such a misfit from being so different from the common person's corrupted philosophy on life that the one who is different is decided to be labelled negatively.

How about instead of using the term "borderline personality" and simply state the condition exhibited by the actions and continue your story from there?
 unspoiled
Joined: 9/25/2011
Msg: 719 (view)
 
would you marry for money?
Posted: 10/20/2011 7:24:44 PM
Carpe: "
Well...OF COURSE lots of women are looking for a man with a job/income. It would be kinda dumb to look for an "unstable man". This doesn't make a person a "gold-digger" or "marrying FOR money". More like marrying for a partner in building a life together.
I would think there are many men that also want a stable woman...a partner in life, not a parasite."

???? Apparently you didn't catch what the guy before you was saying.

Why would it be DUMB for a woman to look for an "UNSTABLE" man, as far as whether he as a job or income? Do you not see that many men would not care if the woman was "UNSTABLE" in the same way? In this era of equality, it appears women demand so much more than men. If you refuse to acknowledge this, then I don't know how I can convince you of it when it is so patently clear.

Not letting PERTINENT characteristics guide you but delineating on those things regarding money that so many men do not do DOES make one a gold digger as the objective for a woman is to seek a man who makes money. If we go back some years and keep women at home then more jobs would be available to men and they'd be able to obtain higher salaries because of the supply/demand issue and then men will feel even more gratified to share in with what they have but feminists messed up this natural man-woman relationship. You cannot have full-blown feminism and still try to keep the same demands on men as once would have been the case and when women were not expected to earn money, they could not be labelled as gold diggers so readily.
 unspoiled
Joined: 9/25/2011
Msg: 38 (view)
 
Never Chase Women Because They Will Lose Arousal
Posted: 10/20/2011 7:15:58 PM
In 1850 do you think there was such a thing as a stalker? I think some courtships or a man trying for a woman may have lasted weeks, months, and even years in hopes she breaks down.

I am certain many of you have heard from older people, perhaps your very own parents of how a woman wasn't interested in a man but after plenty of effort that today might be considered "stalking" that the woman finally gave in. There is probably something wired in us for this to occur between men and women.

Did this stalking thing come about after the feminist movement?
 unspoiled
Joined: 9/25/2011
Msg: 11 (view)
 
Fluid vs weight
Posted: 10/20/2011 10:45:37 AM
Use 3.5 and save the 0.5 for another cheesecake or for another use. Sometimes the amount of cream cheese is important so it fills in the crust without going over but apparently it wasn't a problem for you.

Go on familyoven.com and you can find my cheesecakes that are simple to prepare including:

squash
peanut butter
jalapeno
triple chocolate coffee
 unspoiled
Joined: 9/25/2011
Msg: 702 (view)
 
would you marry for money?
Posted: 10/20/2011 4:00:46 AM
Of course so many would but not admit it publicly.
 unspoiled
Joined: 9/25/2011
Msg: 30 (view)
 
Never Chase Women Because They Will Lose Arousal
Posted: 10/19/2011 8:47:32 PM
Let's analyze the options:

1) Chase/pursue, whatever you call it:
a)Woman doesn't like you. Pursue more and she may still not like you or give in as I've heard happen so many times so it's not at all clear0-cut if the first instance of pursuing with rejection leads to permanent rejection...there is no defined number as a guide until which time a woman finally gives in...some want this game to happen and others do not. Unless the woman has an instruction manual she can hand out to all guys, we are left guessing.

b)Woman likes you from the beginning: You can make something happen or then reject her and say it was just to give women a taste of their own medicine (LOL).


2) Don't Chase/pursue:
a)Have to rely on woman chasing you...and it's not in the man's favor, generally speaking.


So, what are the better odds? Did I leave something out?
 unspoiled
Joined: 9/25/2011
Msg: 130 (view)
 
Pregnant and ditched while committed
Posted: 10/19/2011 11:19:36 AM
Let her move in with you? You are her friend, right?
 unspoiled
Joined: 9/25/2011
Msg: 14 (view)
 
Never Chase Women Because They Will Lose Arousal
Posted: 10/19/2011 11:09:16 AM
LOL bigflick, funny how those things work. The big problem is that undue attention to just a few guys allows them to cheat easily and treat the women as mere tissues- but women still keep making it happen.

As much as women claim they look for the character in a man, their actions don't seem to add up.
 unspoiled
Joined: 9/25/2011
Msg: 12 (view)
 
Never Chase Women Because They Will Lose Arousal
Posted: 10/19/2011 10:45:49 AM
If the one chasing was a famous movie star or insanely rich guy, or some fireman (I still get a kick out of the obsession over an occupation), then it's perfectly fine for most women. They'd be able to "complain" to all their girlfriends about it.
 unspoiled
Joined: 9/25/2011
Msg: 109 (view)
 
Is it Wrong to call a woman handsome?
Posted: 10/18/2011 6:20:06 PM
I like using the word "comely" to throw them off.
 unspoiled
Joined: 9/25/2011
Msg: 63 (view)
 
Holiday Blues...
Posted: 10/18/2011 6:18:36 PM
They're just man-made holidays. Nothing to read into.
 unspoiled
Joined: 9/25/2011
Msg: 296 (view)
 
Why do women like Jerks
Posted: 10/18/2011 6:16:16 PM
I didn't notice bluesman's post, msg #284 until now, and I fully concur. That point #7 should get some women thinking
 unspoiled
Joined: 9/25/2011
Msg: 285 (view)
 
Why do women like Jerks
Posted: 10/18/2011 9:41:40 AM
The first three messages made it painfully clear.

It boggles the mind why the cycle keeps going on.

See: http://datingmateselection.blogspot.com It's my 15-page prose on this subject.

I believe we need a program called something like "Relations", as different from using the word "sex" in "sex education", and talk more broadly about relationships with family and eventually go into those things that motivate a girl in selecting a boy to then have her question whether they are reasonable motivation in the sense of them having something relevant to a fruitful relationship ---a guy just being on the high school football team to me is one of those flimsy reasons.

Unfortunately, women are the ones choosing, NOT men. Men can try all they want but the women are the ones who dictate if a relationship can happen, especially if sex is ever to occur. Women so often choose poorly as we all know and it's about time they be using some reason in their selection process without waiting until they are 40 years of age and finally figured it out. If they passed up those 80% crappy guys, those guys would have to reform to have a chance, but while women love the crappy ones, they have no encouragement to get better and the guys on the sidelines with continually be complaining why this world functions so illogically.
 unspoiled
Joined: 9/25/2011
Msg: 207 (view)
 
I don't want a relationship between equals. There, I said it.
Posted: 10/18/2011 9:17:30 AM
Excellent. It has gone too far. One gal I dated had a spreadsheet documenting all expenses to make certain she wouldn't get short-changed a penny.
 unspoiled
Joined: 9/25/2011
Msg: 110 (view)
 
what are some of the times you most miss a relationship-not the obvious ones
Posted: 10/17/2011 3:11:14 PM
Being greeted upon arriving home.
Having someone to think about.
 unspoiled
Joined: 9/25/2011
Msg: 161 (view)
 
Men Who Only Relate to Beautiful Women....
Posted: 10/17/2011 10:23:44 AM
Tall IQ2 summed it up well (the second post of this thread).

Women should be looking at their own motivations and question why they are attracted to a man because a good deal of the time, especially when the female is younger, it'll be on flimsy reasons.
 unspoiled
Joined: 9/25/2011
Msg: 43 (view)
 
Have you ever psychoanalyzed your partner or been with one who psychoanalyzed you?
Posted: 10/17/2011 9:57:06 AM
Yes, of course, all the time from the very beginning, with reservations of course and not to simply come to a solid conclusion as I've seen done without the use of logic. In today's world, games are played all too often and so there needs to be constant judging of a person's actions for self-preservation.
 unspoiled
Joined: 9/25/2011
Msg: 15 (view)
 
Need Insight
Posted: 10/17/2011 9:53:34 AM
Who gives a birthday card at the same time as telling the person not to contact them for a while?

Who is bi-polar here?

If anything from how women typically communicate in opposing meanings to what they want, I suppose they could be considered bi-polar, but perhaps we need to make some better definitions without labeling and just discuss the issue as plainly as possible.

Why even bother continuing as friends?

Am I missing something that is not disclosed?
 unspoiled
Joined: 9/25/2011
Msg: 31 (view)
 
Insecurity vs. selfishness
Posted: 10/16/2011 2:02:46 PM
Well, I think some insecurity is actually with you, sir, for having the desire to and in some way displaying photos of you with actresses/models.

She does has an insecurity but it's in part based on what you have presented in your insecurity.

As far as the magazine goes, if you like the woman enough, she could be mostly what you focus your eyes on and get sneak looks at other women in public instead of having the magazine. Putting your energy into her, in my opinion, could have strengthened the relationship.

Today, more than ever, we have many ways to deviate from focusing on our mates and if we don't cut loose of some of those ways, deep relationships will be rare.
 unspoiled
Joined: 9/25/2011
Msg: 34 (view)
 
Women looking for an honest man
Posted: 10/16/2011 9:24:17 AM
As one guy mentioned, if women wanted honesty they would have it as it's freely available by a small percentage of men, but it's just so easy to be enthralled with danger such as doing drugs, acting tough smoking cigarettes, revolting against parents and ending up with crappy men. How else do so many women end up with kids and the guy has left the picture?

Had women chose the right kind of guy (of the good 20% or so) from the beginning there would be so few single moms and the rest of the bad behavior men would have to change for the better to be accepted but while women love crappy men, they don't have a reason to change.
 unspoiled
Joined: 9/25/2011
Msg: 14 (view)
 
Income Requirement
Posted: 10/14/2011 4:19:52 PM
I say match me with women who have a credit rating of 840 - see how many of them meet my standard.
 unspoiled
Joined: 9/25/2011
Msg: 13 (view)
 
Income Requirement
Posted: 10/14/2011 4:12:24 PM
It's insane and unrelated to love but women are the ones making a big deal of it.

I do not care if the woman makes zero. It simply does not matter to me. But would they care? If so, they could all drop out of the workforce and allow men to be the primary earners, but of course they don't want that to happen.

I make so little money but because of being clever I have far more than the average person yet if I blow it like average people do, it'd go fast.

It would be more relevant to know how a person uses money, not how much they earn.

Too bad a man who is responsible will be viewed negatively by women yet so many love to be in relationships with guys having 500 credit rating, driving uninsured and can't save a dime for spending it all on her...what a way to live, eh?
 unspoiled
Joined: 9/25/2011
Msg: 207 (view)
 
My gf won't even let me touch her down there
Posted: 10/13/2011 9:10:32 PM
This is where maturity (or low sex drive) really helps. Being antsy in wanting something so badly puts you at a big disadvantage and I really know how it feels like. The woman controls much of what will or will not happen. You have to be willing to let her control that, albeit with some nudging but if she is not succumbing, you have to back off.

There could be some unfairness between how SOME women will allow themselves to give in to bad guys and to give less to a guy she thinks is a keeper, at least in the beginning (I know to men sounds so illogical and while in it , it can drive you nuts). What is not fully recognized by younger men is that capturing a woman's heart is a greater accomplishment than having sex.

I think if you could just ask her this, perhaps your decision to hang around could be made better: "Are you contemplating making this a long-term relationship, and if so would you help me out a little, even if you just lend a helping hand?"

Perhaps a woman could amend some of what I said above.
 unspoiled
Joined: 9/25/2011
Msg: 3 (view)
 
Age of matches on profile home page
Posted: 10/13/2011 11:24:30 AM
Well it helps somewhat but it's so discouraging to see what is on the page once I log in, as if the algorithm by this site pairs up men with similar to older aged women and of a body type that I find deplorable, most of whom have been married which is not what I want and most of whom had kids which again is not what I want.
 unspoiled
Joined: 9/25/2011
Msg: 65 (view)
 
Ladies obession with tall men...
Posted: 10/11/2011 4:55:49 AM
I go into some of this on http://datingmateselection.blogspot.com

It's 15-pages long and directed mostly for the United States but has relevance elsewhere.
 unspoiled
Joined: 9/25/2011
Msg: 64 (view)
 
Ladies obession with tall men...
Posted: 10/11/2011 4:53:56 AM
I hope I can contribute a different angle to this.

When women are obsessed over the height of a man, she is setting herself up for failure to a higher degree. Women so often complain about men cheating but when you have a 2:1 ratio of women to men as far women being obsessed on his height to the tall guys they are obsessing over, he has plenty to choose among and even while in the relationship to allow for easy cheating.

The same goes for obsessing over money. Women need to understand the logic but near-sighted thinking will almost always get them into trouble. When a man has so much money to woo a gal he can do the same to other women when she's not looking, even if it's a 30-minute tryst that could easily be kept from her.

Women should understand their inner motivations and counter with reason.
 unspoiled
Joined: 9/25/2011
Msg: 18 (view)
 
High standards?
Posted: 10/10/2011 2:57:27 AM
Perhaps they have an array of adult toys to keep them happy.

I knew of age 40+ women who would exchange BAGS full of romance books which is like porn to them.

So I guess while they have these to keep them going, they have no need to shed a few pounds and they can maintain their unrealistic high requirements. So many guys just wish they'd stay in shape, as if that's too much to ask for? Losing 5 pounds is much easier than a guy adding a $100K to his bank account.

I wish women would see the logic in what's going on. Just because they have what guys want does not mean we will all do back flips to get it.
 unspoiled
Joined: 9/25/2011
Msg: 59 (view)
 
Obesity a bigger turn-off than STD?
Posted: 10/9/2011 8:14:25 PM
I'll go for the std gal. Just find a way around the disease part even if not done in the typical way. It's more about a partnership anyway. If it's incurable then not much can be done except stay healthy from that point on but obesity is curable and should have been cured before looking for a mate. One had not much of a choice but the other chose not to do anything about the problem. So, weigh out the difference between the actions of each.
 unspoiled
Joined: 9/25/2011
Msg: 25 (view)
 
failed ltr vs divorce
Posted: 10/5/2011 3:38:59 PM
OregonYankee: I do see what you mean. Those are the types of thoughts that go through a woman's minds just like if a woman view two different men in person, one with a woman on his arm and the other with no woman-it would be viewed by her that the guy with a gal is worthy and that there must be something wrong with the guy who's by himself. This partly explains why some men cheat-it's women who allow it because of how a good deal of women will invoke her innate jealousy and try to take a man away from another woman. I saw how this played out many times on me, even by her best friend-it feels so weird that the psyche of a woman is motivated in this way and yet she could control her womanly instincts if she chose to do so.

I am actually proud to tell women how many months or years I haven't had a kiss in showing I am not a player in needing to get something all the time as I could if that was my objective and I suspect this too would be viewed negatively. I would love to hear the same from a woman and I would not contort it in my mind to think something is wrong with her by avoiding men for being generally suspect of them.
 unspoiled
Joined: 9/25/2011
Msg: 23 (view)
 
failed ltr vs divorce
Posted: 10/5/2011 9:40:23 AM
I've thought about this same thing for a number of years.

When you commit to someone with the intention of being together till death, in essence it's the same thing as being married as no contract can hold people together more than the mindsets of the persons involved.

So if you were committed 10 times in your life, it's like being married ten times and divorced ten times. But I think especially for women. if she was married she likely opened herself up even more to a guy than she would if not married and then the psychological dilemma of a man thinking he should be #1 or get more than the previous guy and there isn't anymore that she could give him. I may be wrong about some of these assumptions but they appear reasonable to me.

Understandably, all the failed committed relationships should be counted similarly to divorces but they are not and thus one who is divorced is deemed worse, unfairly. I am not divorced but I certainly see the unfairness.

This could be so much simpler if we just thought a bit when younger and stuck to one and only one person!
 unspoiled
Joined: 9/25/2011
Msg: 10 (view)
 
High standards?
Posted: 10/4/2011 11:03:15 AM
I don't understand the basis for high standards being as it seems there is well more than the national average of obesity here in Oregon, at least for Southern Oregon, and they may even have kids with or without being divorced, as if just on these fundamental bases, they could consider themselves as catches.

Well guess that's how it is. Thin women normally would get so much attention in real life they wouldn't be here unless there was some extraordinary circumstance. Some things can be helped and obesity is one of them.
 unspoiled
Joined: 9/25/2011
Msg: 44 (view)
 
50+ Guys With Motorcycles?? What do women do?
Posted: 9/29/2011 12:07:19 PM
If you have the money, I suppose you are the boss in how you spend it, but many people are not wise in their spending behavior and might buy a motorcycle or lots of shoes or clothes while NOT being so well-off to have loads of money left over. These such people have a huge pool of potential mates to choose from so I wouldn't be concerned about them. Financial irresponsibility is the norm in the USA.

It's those who are wise with money who will have trouble finding mates, most particularly if it's the man who possess this critical trait.
 unspoiled
Joined: 9/25/2011
Msg: 1 (view)
 
Age of "matches" on profile home page
Posted: 9/29/2011 12:02:13 PM
I don't know why I get so many photos showing of women my age and older. Is there a way to adjust it with the search feature?

Some men didn't live the fast life of making many children and being married and so for some guys, a better match with women who didn't go through all those processes would likely be younger than my age - to have more pertinent things in common other than just how many times we traveled around the Sun.
 unspoiled
Joined: 9/25/2011
Msg: 104 (view)
 
Do women in Oregon ever mail first
Posted: 9/29/2011 11:58:13 AM
Yes, they do. In my personal experience, if they do it's because they want to get it on right away and I'm not into that stuff, and likely they're very much overweight. It might be just desperation on their part.
 unspoiled
Joined: 9/25/2011
Msg: 99 (view)
 
Do all Men Want a thins or small waisted girl?
Posted: 9/29/2011 11:51:48 AM
If the weight causes an issue, why not just lose it. Of course it would have been more efficient to not have gained it in the first place and so one would ask why this wasn't done. When walking, if you first began to feel a jiggle, it was a wake-up call to do something about it.
 unspoiled
Joined: 9/25/2011
Msg: 98 (view)
 
Do all Men Want a thins or small waisted girl?
Posted: 9/29/2011 11:48:31 AM
Well, compared to many aspects of a person that can be helped versus cannot, weight is one item that a person has some control over. The size of ear, foot, whether has freckles or not, color of eyes, and so on are things that we can't help. But weight, in choosing not to engorge on potato chips, french fries, and soda and in choosing not to exercise shows the behavior of a person.

It's sad what I see in Southern Oregon. I think many men feel they have no other choice but to accept obesity but I'd rather go a few years before I make another such mistake.
 unspoiled
Joined: 9/25/2011
Msg: 42 (view)
 
Why do men put pictures on the profiles with no shirts?
Posted: 9/29/2011 11:43:39 AM
How funny. Even though mammary glands are not sex organs, this culture somehow relates the masses of adipose tissue with sexuality as opposed to a man's chest. I'd be more concerned with women flaunting their stuff than what men are doing as far as what is shown above the waist. I, myself am not impressed by seeing breasts. If the woman wants to show as much of them as possible, I figure she thinks she is sexy because of them and would likely have a bad attitude in thinking she can garnish the attention of men with them to fulfill her psychological need. They're roadblocks to the more important parts.
 
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