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 Author Thread: Viewed me / who I viewed empty?
 ms.iceni
Joined: 2/3/2007
Msg: 4 (view)
 
Viewed me / who I viewed empty?
Posted: 11/4/2016 3:41:47 AM
It doubt it will come back unless you pay for a membership. We've lost the free parts bit by bit, it's just one more feature we've lost.
 ms.iceni
Joined: 2/3/2007
Msg: 7 (view)
 
Meet me all diappeared?
Posted: 2/17/2015 7:39:42 AM
Mine are gone too
 MS.ICENI
Joined: 2/3/2007
Msg: 10 (view)
 
Failure to commit?
Posted: 10/19/2014 9:24:20 AM
Make this a life lesson. You were rebound guy and you saw things through rose colored glasses. You weren't a "fool"...just someone who didn't want to see reality... we have all done that. If you can deal with it, continue dating, if not, then move on.
 MS.ICENI
Joined: 2/3/2007
Msg: 18 (view)
 
How do you know when it's over?
Posted: 10/19/2014 9:00:00 AM
It's over...move on and quit checking for him online.
 ms.iceni
Joined: 2/3/2007
Msg: 3 (view)
 
OKAY! Give it to me
Posted: 10/10/2014 11:40:58 AM
You need to take the "boi" out of your screenname. Your main pic makes you look like a boy too. I prefer the gray shirt one, but I would recommend you get a better headshot and remove the creepy smile. Are you a boy or a man? Any girl/woman looking at your profile will stop when they see "BUM" at the top. Just for starters....
 ms.iceni
Joined: 2/3/2007
Msg: 28 (view)
 
Should I do what my mum did so my dates like me for my personality??
Posted: 10/10/2014 10:49:51 AM
It's a really bad idea to come into a forum such as this and ask such a life altering question. If you feel you have no alternative but to ask strangers, then you are not ready to have anything done right now. Keep this in mind, guys will try and sleep with anyone, big or small, and it's up to the girl/woman to say yes or no.
You have to grow up and learn to make your own decisions. What I would recommend is that you might seek some counseling and do some serious maturing. When you grow up you'll be better able to pick better guys, and maybe you won't feel the need to drastically change your body unless you have other physical problems that need to be addressed with being large busted. But do it for the right reason, not to make someone like you. Believe it...even if you have this done now, nothing will change because you are still going to be you in your head. No surgical procedure will fix that.
And one last word of motherly advice...go to profile review right down the hall>>>because you come across pretty pathetic with what you have now. Some very nice people will give you some ideas on how to improve your image online.
 ms.iceni
Joined: 2/3/2007
Msg: 10 (view)
 
I hate how people try to act like they are above others on dating sites.
Posted: 9/28/2014 9:04:12 AM
You need to take a stop back and make this whole process more of a meet-up-like-to-get-to-know-you process instead of asking date questions. The idea is to get the first meet and greet.
And while I have your attention, you might need to go to profile review down the hall for some really good advice>>>>. I can tell you right now that NO one is going to want a first date with you if you want to take them to McDonalds. Bad, bad choice.
 ms.iceni
Joined: 2/3/2007
Msg: 11 (view)
 
88 women arrested was nothing!
Posted: 9/26/2014 2:52:52 PM
In this country, you are innocent until proven guilty.
That being said, we could always adopt Sharia Law. That way these women would be stuck in a hole and stoned to death...without benefit of trial. Just some guys who decided they weren't following the "correct" way of female conduct.
 ms.iceni
Joined: 2/3/2007
Msg: 4 (view)
 
Only dating 2 months, what should I do?
Posted: 9/25/2014 1:55:55 PM
The fact that right out of the gate he's told you that he's fresh from a serious 2 year relationship tells you that he is still hurting...a lot. He's rebounding and you are rebound girl. You, one the other hand, are still dealing with post marriage adjustment and you said it best..."I don't like how this is making me feel."
Listen to your gut and heart...he's not ready and you need to keep from getting in too deep because it probably won't amount to anything but pain for you..it's already doing that. Do you really need this?
The decision is yours to make and you are in complete control of this situation...stay or leave. And BTW...your son needs to be kept out of this because he doesn't need the confusion of this potential mess.
 ms.iceni
Joined: 2/3/2007
Msg: 10 (view)
 
What does she want from me?
Posted: 9/25/2014 1:40:50 PM
You don't have the time to wait for a maybe. I also disagree with the game playing of chatting and "mentioning" you're going on a date...that is soooo high school. If you choose to chat, fine, but date others when you get the opportunity and leave her out of it...it's totally none of her business since she has set the boundaries.
However, if I were voting, I say Option number 3. Move on and find someone who's available.
 ms.iceni
Joined: 2/3/2007
Msg: 7 (view)
 
love @ work!
Posted: 9/24/2014 2:22:41 PM
I'm with maleman999 on this one. Believe it...women know when a guy is interested. If she hasn't dropped an interest hint by now, it's not likely she is attracted. However, that being said, I would still go for it if you have a mind...what's the worse that can happen? At least you would have closure and not keep wondering what if?
Wishing you luck...if it's meant to be, it will happen.
 ms.iceni
Joined: 2/3/2007
Msg: 21 (view)
 
too fast.... or is it just me
Posted: 9/24/2014 1:46:37 PM
You have a history of abuse in relationships. I would also think that you'll attract the same type again. The fact that this guy is charming and telling you everything you want to hear is a RED FLAG to me. Just a word of friendly advice...check out the really good websites on how to spot a potential abusive relationship before you get in too deep.
Personal opinion...Is it too fast? YES, and it's one of the first things you'll read in the above mentioned sites.
TC
Read your update...You go, girl...Trust Your Gut. And I would still recommend you read the above mentioned sites just for your own edification and growth.
 ms.iceni
Joined: 2/3/2007
Msg: 14 (view)
 
Ask someone out after being turned down once?
Posted: 9/24/2014 1:35:07 PM
You don't want to hear this, but you'll hear it again...don't mess at work. Read you Employee Handbook, bet it's got something in there about fraternization and harassment. Leave it alone and move on. But from the sound of it, she's not interested so leave her alone before HR gets involved.
 ms.iceni
Joined: 2/3/2007
Msg: 2 (view)
 
What did i do wrong ?
Posted: 9/24/2014 1:31:30 PM
He has demanded you "leave him alone!" That's pretty clear...Leave Him Alone!!! That is how I understand that...no guesswork needed.
 ms.iceni
Joined: 2/3/2007
Msg: 22 (view)
 
Girl ignored me. Need some advice.
Posted: 9/24/2014 1:27:26 PM
Good Grief. First off, I wish FB had never happened. That being said, just ask the girl for a coffee date at a time and place of her choosing. That puts the ball in her court and it will give you an idea of what's what. If she ignores this invitation, then you know how to proceed...or not!
As to whether she's interested...we can't read minds.
 ms.iceni
Joined: 2/3/2007
Msg: 15 (view)
 
I can't figure this guy out...
Posted: 9/9/2014 11:49:30 AM
"from what I've heard." Gossip...heresay...who cares. How do you know any of this is true? This is their business and not yours. Find something else to do.
 ms.iceni
Joined: 2/3/2007
Msg: 16 (view)
 
Dating Etiquette.....?
Posted: 9/8/2014 7:21:04 AM
I read but I stand by my answer. It applies no matter what your situation.
 ms.iceni
Joined: 2/3/2007
Msg: 10 (view)
 
Dating Etiquette.....?
Posted: 9/7/2014 11:49:59 AM
If you have to come into this public forum and asked these questions at the age of 28 tells me that you had better give this a lot of thought. Seems to me that you're thinking about something that could back fire on you. Let's face it, what you're contemplating could really bite you in the butt. You would have lots and lots of dates, but from guys who have heard from a friend who heard from a friend who heard from a friend that you are looking to try out the goods. Not such a good thing to get around town.
Then there are the other risks...STDs, not to mention those that aren't curable with a shot in the butt. There's another issue...a tiny pink bundle that you will have to take care of...and will you even know who the Daddy is? Try collecting that child support.
So let me clue you in, Dear Heart. There is no Knight In Shining Armour...forget that myth. Guys are people...some good and some not-so-good. A guy worth having will appreciate the fact that you are not free and easy and that he would also appreciate that he would not be the 68th guy who's had sex with you. A guy worth having will respect you if you say No at first. The choice is yours.
 ms.iceni
Joined: 2/3/2007
Msg: 17 (view)
 
Being Quiet /Shy and easy going. Are they seen as negative traits to the opposite sex ?
Posted: 9/7/2014 11:10:16 AM
I'm wondering if there is something else going on that we're not aware of. You are in your late 30s and all your relationships have lasted under a year. Wonderin' why. Only you can answer that question, and I'm thinking it's more than being quiet/shy and easy going.
 ms.iceni
Joined: 2/3/2007
Msg: 19 (view)
 
Do profiles ever get re-read after the first impression?
Posted: 9/7/2014 10:21:03 AM
I, for one, have read and reread profiles, and I have changed my first impression. Personally, I find the profile just as important as the pic/s. No profile/no interest...I don't care how good the pic.
 ms.iceni
Joined: 2/3/2007
Msg: 11 (view)
 
what should i do if a girl says she like guys who are proactive
Posted: 9/7/2014 10:06:04 AM
For once I agree with Joe...this girl is proactively telling you something. If this is not you, then don't try and be someone you're not. Be yourself, then if it doesn't work out, good to know. If you see her again, keep all this stuff in mind when deciding to see her again. Personally? I would look for someone who likes who you are...as yourself. As to this? Nothing lost, nothing invested.
 ms.iceni
Joined: 2/3/2007
Msg: 24 (view)
 
confused
Posted: 9/7/2014 9:59:57 AM
"So you really think that he is not intrested in me long term just using , why would he do that it's not like I live 5 minutes away where he can see me or sleep with me everyday or other day he has to drive some distance and we spent the weekend together and had no sex just conversation and enjoyed night out at the movies and back to his place where we talked and cuddled"

OK, now you are defending your actions but in here wanting validation and answers...in other words...you're "confused." You asked the questions, and you got answers...such is the forums. You won't agree with everyone but you DID ask opinions.
If you're so all fired sure that everything is as you want it then more power to ya. But I will repeat...ACTIONS SPEAK LOUDER THAN WORDS! You're a grown woman of 35, I would bet the farm that this has happened before...just sayin.
 ms.iceni
Joined: 2/3/2007
Msg: 14 (view)
 
Nude cellphone photos
Posted: 9/4/2014 1:18:38 PM
The problem is too much trust in technology. Lots of people don't realize that even if you delete it's never gone. You never know what server it goes to...and it only takes a split second. It is out there forever and you have to keep that in mind every time to do anything online. Many a teen age girl who trusted a boy not to show/share their pics has learned that the hard way.
I was taught years ago to never write anything that you wouldn't want printed on the front page of the New York Times. Same thing applies, only now it's the internet. Once kids are on the computer, they need to hear this over and over and hopefully it will sink in.
 ms.iceni
Joined: 2/3/2007
Msg: 13 (view)
 
confused
Posted: 9/4/2014 1:10:57 PM
Personal Opinion...he's telling you what you want to hear so he can get what he really wants. Actions speak louder than words. You're vulnerable and he's playing. You know the answer...you ARE wasting your time. What to do...realize you really aren't in love, you're just wanting to believe what you're hearing. This sounds like a teenage question, but you are 35...a grown woman. Be the dumper and not the dumpee...you are in complete control of your actions...move on.
 ms.iceni
Joined: 2/3/2007
Msg: 17 (view)
 
Guys in particular - Does she have a point?
Posted: 9/3/2014 9:29:49 AM
"Meanwhile, a recent study shows that most Western women cheat no matter how well the husband treats her. The women have no conscience or remorse."

Just love these type of responses...studies show blah blah blah. Please tell me (and all of us) where this study was conducted and the published results? And how do you know that women have no conscience or remorse? I do know that I've heard the same from women about men. It's a two way street...one gender isn't better or worse than the other.
 ms.iceni
Joined: 2/3/2007
Msg: 16 (view)
 
Blocked after she said she wants to meet
Posted: 7/30/2014 11:09:15 AM
^^^Like everyone stated above...forget it/move on.
 ms.iceni
Joined: 2/3/2007
Msg: 18 (view)
 
Second Chances
Posted: 7/30/2014 11:07:11 AM
I agree with Lady...words on a screen do not show tone of voice, facial expression, and you also can't ask the intent. Only you can decide, but I would venture another brief date and then you'll have a better "gut" feeling on whether you overreacted. He could have just said something dumb and you didn't get it. I know I've done it...everyone has.
 ms.iceni
Joined: 2/3/2007
Msg: 30 (view)
 
or avoid the advice your younger self was given
Posted: 7/2/2014 6:37:53 PM
I would have taken better care of my teeth. Not dating related but good advice just the same.
Always trust your gut.
The only person you can change is yourself. You'll never change any man at any time.
Don't believe it when a guy tells you he can't father children.
Of course you can't live it over...but sometimes you are allowed to wonder...at least for a little while.
 ms.iceni
Joined: 2/3/2007
Msg: 27 (view)
 
Does he have the right to be bitter?
Posted: 7/2/2014 6:22:24 PM
How can we know? There is too much we don't know and aren't qualified to judge anyway. You know the saying...judge not....... I do know that churches are no different from other institutions when it comes to politics, manipulation and back stabbing. I also wonder what this husband would think knowing his wife is on a dating site, asking questions about his personal business for all the world to see. His wife is also stating she is looking for casual dating/no commitment . Just saying.
 ms.iceni
Joined: 2/3/2007
Msg: 4 (view)
 
Is it realistic?
Posted: 7/2/2014 5:56:04 PM
When marriage was invented people were lucky to live til their 30s, maybe 40s. You couldn't spend all your time together because Hubby had to hunt, protect the home, father the family and literally keep the wolf from the door. Wifey got pregnant, stayed pregnant, gathered nuts and roots, took care of the roasting mammouth, and home front. Love was an option and you were extremely lucky if it was included because the name of the game was survival and getting the next generation grown. We expect too much from marriage...it can't be everything to us all the time. As your coworker is well aware, we all need some time for ourselves and our own interests. You are fortunate you are thinking like this so you can make wise choices in the future.
You are being realistic and when you're dating make sure you communicate this to any potential partner so she feels like you. There are couples who have part of their lives away from the spouse and then come back together better, more interesting people. Then there's the man cave...every guy needs one with fishing poles, big screen TV, power tools, fridge for beer, and leather couch for watching football on Sundays with his buddies. When I was young, I wanted to be together all the time...now I know better...and so do you. Good Luck.
 ms.iceni
Joined: 2/3/2007
Msg: 25 (view)
 
my boyfriend is cheating on me...should I end it?
Posted: 7/2/2014 8:42:07 AM
If you're in here asking, then yes, you should end it. You're also looking through his phone which means you don't trust him anyway. And one more point, if he's cheating on you then you are NOT the one he wants to have a long term relationship with. The actions say everything. The decision is yours and yours alone but being a glutton for punishment is not attractive and really desperate. No wonder he cheats...because he can and gets away with it. Only YOU can change YOUR situation.
 ms.iceni
Joined: 2/3/2007
Msg: 8 (view)
 
How to delicately handle a recent widower
Posted: 6/29/2014 9:01:22 AM
This is a sensitive situation. You read in here all the time the cautionary tales about rebounding from people that have just broken up from a relationship/marriage, and that they need to give it some time to rest, recover, and readjust. I would apply the same to this situation.
In the last 2 years I've been contacted by recent widowers (and I mean the funeral was days before) and several have even told me that they would love me forever...and we haven't even met. Experience has taught me that they are looking for someone to replace the wife and they just don't want to live alone and deal with the adjustment period which I feel is necessary. I want to be loved for me, not a replacement for the deceased. I will also not be a grief counselor.
As to this situation...be upfront with your concerns. I agree with you, 2 months is too soon. Keep it friendly but if this was his first date, then he needs to live alone first so he has a chance to grieve first, then meet and love someone for who they are and not a quick replacement.
 ms.iceni
Joined: 2/3/2007
Msg: 9 (view)
 
I don't understand the signals this girl has sent
Posted: 6/27/2014 1:07:34 PM
Forget the texting. CALL her for another date.
 ms.iceni
Joined: 2/3/2007
Msg: 9 (view)
 
She likes me, but says she doesn't want to hurt me?
Posted: 6/27/2014 1:00:59 PM
This is girlspeak...you're a friend but she might want to keep you on the back burner. I can only guess. If you're OK with keeping this as a buddy deal, go for it. But understand...it will probably not go anywhere (or you might be a between-boyfriends backup plan) and if you're involved with her, you might miss out on someone who really wants to be with YOU. The decision in yours, but if you're asking for opinions, I would venture a back off. You seem like a nice guy and deserve better.
 ms.iceni
Joined: 2/3/2007
Msg: 14 (view)
 
How did this happen?
Posted: 6/23/2014 5:11:15 PM
You can't be abused without your permission. You allow it; you know what will happen, but you still do it. There's a word for that...
"Masochist | What is the Definition of Masochist? | Dictionary.com
SimilarPsychiatry. a person who has masochism, the condition in which sexual or other
gratification depends on one's suffering physical pain or humiliation."
 ms.iceni
Joined: 2/3/2007
Msg: 10 (view)
 
Question About a Girl
Posted: 6/23/2014 4:50:10 PM
You missed a RED Flag...that her heart is still broken and she needs someone to mend it. HELLO! That would make you rebound guy. You know, the guy who fixes stuff just to be rejected for the next guy. She deleted your message; that's all you need to know. You could also be coming across as desperate with a second message...a real deal breaker. Be grateful she didn't respond back and learn from this...you can't be a rescuer.
 ms.iceni
Joined: 2/3/2007
Msg: 22 (view)
 
Have you ever developed feelings for someone after getting to know them?
Posted: 6/23/2014 3:53:06 PM
I've met people who I thought were "hot" until I got to know them...then they got uglier and uglier. Then I've people who didn't impress me at first blush but got much more attractive as I got to know them. Guess you might call that inner beauty peeping through.
 ms.iceni
Joined: 2/3/2007
Msg: 216 (view)
 
Mensa? anyone?
Posted: 6/19/2014 9:25:20 AM
OK, you take a test and then you are gifted with the Mensa title. Big deal. The several Mensa men I've encountered were arrogant and rude. Nothing beats good old common sense and knowing how to deal with real life.
 ms.iceni
Joined: 2/3/2007
Msg: 17 (view)
 
Should I let go?
Posted: 6/19/2014 9:13:56 AM
This went way too fast, especially with younger children involved. And as to these "medical" issues involved, my Red Flags are waving. My take? This is a control/manipulation issue and she is looking for someone to take care of her. YOU, however, can get out. In making your decision...go by how she acts, not by what she says. That is, unless you want to be caretaker, baby sitter, loser for the rest of your life.
And as to this "bi polar" diagnosis that's being thrown around these days. Is everyone bi polar now? While there are people that are really having issues, I'm always put on guard when that word is used for it just seems so many people use the latest catch phrase as a way to get out of dealing with life. Take a pill and go on disability...or find a person willing to put up with it. Best advice...RUN, get a job, and next time, choose wisely. I just feel sorry for that child who has been caught up on this tangle.
And something to think about...the less you work during your productive years, the less Social Security/savings you will collect/have. Check into it.
 ms.iceni
Joined: 2/3/2007
Msg: 10 (view)
 
Girlfriend broke up with me out of blue
Posted: 6/18/2014 3:54:24 PM
"spent a month together and after she left she's starting to feel confused. She than proceeded and broke up with me. She said she doesn't know what to feel and that she is battling her heart and mind. She then says I am her best friend and we have always been best friends even during our relationship."

This is girlspeak for "it's over...sorry". She doesn't know what she wants and needs to grow up. You need to move on and let her do it.
 ms.iceni
Joined: 2/3/2007
Msg: 16 (view)
 
Need some man advice
Posted: 6/17/2014 3:34:44 PM
This sounds like a time bomb ready to blow up. You need to be very, very careful in this situation. If you get this job, you also need to read the employee handbook on fraternization, because you can believe most companies look down on it. If you are a subordinate, then have him as a boss, that's even worse. And if, for some reason, you start dating and then break up...well it would probably be you looking for another job. There's been lots of lawsuits regarding situations like this and HRs don't like it. I've seen it happen.
 ms.iceni
Joined: 2/3/2007
Msg: 16 (view)
 
Don't know what to do
Posted: 6/17/2014 3:25:22 PM
You've been warned...he's not available and doesn't want to give up his lifestyle. What part of that do you not get? If he was really interested, you wouldn't be in here because you would be planning your next date. Let it go and move on.
 ms.iceni
Joined: 2/3/2007
Msg: 9 (view)
 
Confused about how to get 2nd date
Posted: 6/17/2014 3:22:56 PM
I agree with carolann...text her once and let her know you're interested and to contact you when she returns. If you don't hear from her...well, there ya go!
 ms.iceni
Joined: 2/3/2007
Msg: 14 (view)
 
How can I let go for good?
Posted: 6/17/2014 3:18:53 PM
Congratulations on being smart enough to see what's really going on. Thank your lucky stars that the wedding is off and that you'll not have to go through a really messy marriage, awful divorce, maybe with children caught up with this loser and years of frustration and anger. You're not ready to let go but you know you will...with time. Just keep thinking of what you do have...a career, a brain, and the will power to run your own life. Just keep faking it til you make it. We've all had our hearts broken and survived...you will too. TC, and Good Luck to YOU!!!!
 ms.iceni
Joined: 2/3/2007
Msg: 17 (view)
 
Am I asking too much from our kids, especially her son?
Posted: 6/8/2014 9:54:50 AM
This is about teaching your child about responsibility. Apparently he hasn't been taught the value of money so this is now an issue. My mother expected 25% of whatever I made whenever I worked until I moved out. It was NOT negotible. Instead of expecting him to help pay for gas (which I think is a real bargain) tell him he should starting paying for his own meals and laundry. Pretty simple, really. If he had his own car, it would be much more expensive with gas, insurance and upkeep.
This kid needs a reality check and you need to grow a pair and let him know in no uncertain terms he needs to contribute, or you won't help with school. Will he be angry? Of course, but you are not a friend...you are a parent and it's your job to get him ready for the future. This is a life lesson, and if he wants help with school expenses, he needs to learn to be grateful and appreciate what he does have. With gas at almost 4.00 a gallon, I don't feel it's too much. Both you and your wife need to get on the same page and present a united front. They need to feel the pinch, too, just like everyone else who drives.
From the mother of a 44 year old son who had to make some tough decisions. It's not easy, but someone has to do it.
 ms.iceni
Joined: 2/3/2007
Msg: 16 (view)
 
Surviving 'Infidelity/Cheating'
Posted: 6/7/2014 6:32:01 PM
When I was younger, I witnessed this behavior growing up. I'll keep the gory details out of this, but now that I have lots of life experience, I will say that when it comes to cheating, it's a couple issue and both parties contribute to the problems that leads one or both to stray. This is not a popular stance but my opinion? It takes two to make, it takes two to break. Couples can survive and thrive, but it takes both to work on the relationship, figure out what was lacking/wrong with the relationship and either deal with it, or break up. Couples counseling can be very useful, but BOTH parties have to be on board or it just won't work.
 ms.iceni
Joined: 2/3/2007
Msg: 8 (view)
 
My boyfriend need space? Help?
Posted: 6/6/2014 3:44:27 PM
"I was worried about he was divorced only 7months ago. so i asked him "Are you really ready for relationship? How about your child support or something" "

Your gut and common sense was right on target, but you wanted it to be true.
This guy is not ready for any kind of relationship. If he really loved you he would not treat you this way. So my best advice is go by what he does, not by what he says. He wants space, give it to him. If he says he's not ready, believe him. Don't waste your good time and energy on a maybe which will probably not work out. Take control, because you can. Leave it and move on. You state this is your first love, well they rarely work out and you will cry for awhile but you'll recover and be a stronger woman for it. Just remember...we've all been there and done that, and survived. TC and Good Luck.
 ms.iceni
Joined: 2/3/2007
Msg: 10 (view)
 
and if she hadn't turned out hot?
Posted: 5/30/2014 4:47:03 PM
Who knows...let it go and move on. We are not mind readers.
 ms.iceni
Joined: 2/3/2007
Msg: 21 (view)
 
How to bed a good friend ?
Posted: 5/30/2014 7:25:18 AM
Whether you want to bed him or not is your business. However, this guy is on the rebound and needs some rest, recovery, and reflection. If you are a real friend, you give him that before you pounce.
 ms.iceni
Joined: 2/3/2007
Msg: 6 (view)
 
is this a sign of a man losing interest or busy?
Posted: 5/26/2014 3:10:27 PM
After looking at your profile, it states casual dating/no commitment. He took that to mean just that. Go by what he does, not by what he says (or texts). I would venture he got his and now he's gone. Make this a life lesson and act accordingly in the future. As to texting...while it has it's place, don't use it for trying to build any kind of relationship...it's cold, impersonal, and too many things can be misconstrued.
 
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