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 Author Thread: To all you flakes out there
 funny4uwannatry
Joined: 12/27/2011
Msg: 14 (view)
 
To all you flakes out there
Posted: 1/12/2016 10:39:24 AM
Scary rant. She didn't flake, she tried to beg God for wings so she could fly far far way.
 funny4uwannatry
Joined: 12/27/2011
Msg: 59 (view)
 
am I the only one or....
Posted: 1/12/2016 10:26:38 AM
Even when "swamped" with messages,weeding through the wackos and assorted losers, pathetic and womanizers, she is often left with very few she actually wants to meet. She of course is called a gold digger in spite of the fact she is college educated, lives in the suburbs and self supporting. That one always makes me laugh. Why do men think she needs to date someone who does not work, or is seeking a place to stay or simply does not fit into her world?
She is called too picky if she turns down a second date or refused to continue to email someone she eliminates by something he said or did either on line or at a meeting. I have met a couple of men who I thought a second meeting would be nice, however, for whatever reason, they did not feel the same way. I d not feel the need to insult him, call him names or make up some lame excuse to make myself feel better, Try accepting you are not his or her cup of tea and move on.
 funny4uwannatry
Joined: 12/27/2011
Msg: 4 (view)
 
Miracles do happen
Posted: 5/25/2013 8:17:22 AM
I agree, come back after 6 month or a year when the honeymoon phase is over and the real deal is there. Will the relationship still be awesome? I hope so for you!!

The on line dating community appears scarred and not too open to the idea of real happiness.. Maybe its experience or maybe its just the ones who have been burnt over and over again become cynical. I still believe it happens.. best of luck to you!!
 funny4uwannatry
Joined: 12/27/2011
Msg: 86 (view)
 
Getting in a car with a guy from on this site
Posted: 5/22/2013 7:55:16 AM
It is just safer to meet someone and drive yourself there and home. When I was dating, I did not let people I did not know well see where I lived. Only after dating a while and feeling safe did I allow a man to pick me up at my home.

There are really nice men out there and there are also creepy stalkers. I say its better to be safe than sorry. I would not allow a man I do not know to drive me anywhere.

I am glad you were not hurt OP and you learned a valuable lesson. Not everyone is nice.
 funny4uwannatry
Joined: 12/27/2011
Msg: 299 (view)
 
Dancing
Posted: 5/19/2013 7:10:29 AM
The little sports bikes are nice for kids, but I prefer a nice Harley for a cruise. I would say its individual choice, but I personally know many beautiful women who love riding on the back of a bike. The young ones may think the sports bike is cute, but most bikers are out enjoying the ride, catching some sun, and enjoying the freedom.

I have yet to meet a guy with a Harley who complained about the aerodynamics f a female riding with him. Maybe he just appreciates a woman being with him to share the experience.

Those with a sports bike would not attract most "biker"women in my opinion. Who wants a man with a solo seat and an uncomfortable bike? Shows his interests are more about himself than a relationship. Maybe he rides a kids bike to relive his childhood, kind of like the old man in the corvette thing. Not dancing and not compromising anything for her happiness may indicate narcissism and his lack of real interest in sharing his time.
 funny4uwannatry
Joined: 12/27/2011
Msg: 23 (view)
 
Guy's Profile is Deleted, and then He Comes Back With a New Profile Name
Posted: 5/19/2013 6:59:13 AM
Some had a dating profile when they were actively dating, but no longer need it and open a forums only profile. I have seen that. I personally have never been deleted.
 funny4uwannatry
Joined: 12/27/2011
Msg: 21 (view)
 
Guy's Profile is Deleted, and then He Comes Back With a New Profile Name
Posted: 5/19/2013 6:47:45 AM
Sounds a little odd to me. If he was deleted, most likely there was a reason, usually not an error. Maybe his wife caught him.. maybe he sent dirty messages, maybe he was a smart mouth on forums. What ever the reason, it would be a huge red flag.

On line dating can be full of crazies.
 funny4uwannatry
Joined: 12/27/2011
Msg: 27 (view)
 
desperate attempts for communication
Posted: 5/19/2013 6:42:21 AM
This simply means Mr. Player has run out of better options and is now coming back to you. There are several men on line who think they are God's gift to women and play the numbers game. They are talking to as many women as possible in the beginning and often lose track of who they actually talked to and what they said.

When Mr. Cool is rejected by all the women he thought were hotter than you, he will come back with his "smooth" lines. Let him know you did not think he was all that in the first place and certainly not worth waiting for. In fact let him know you barely remember who he is.

If you did not "make the round one cut" why would you want to settle for his desperation choice?
 funny4uwannatry
Joined: 12/27/2011
Msg: 289 (view)
 
Dancing
Posted: 5/17/2013 8:28:10 AM
I would rather have the motorcycle personally.

From my experience, many men want a women to watch hockey, football and other sports. If a woman does not, she ends up alone many weekends and many evenings. However, I have never forced a man to dance, or even tried to persuade him into enjoying it. When I want to dance, I dance with my friends. Most times, he will do a slow dance or two.

This is just a matter of preference.. if he does not want to dance, that is not a deal breaker for me. The deal breaker would be sports taking over the entire relationship.

I personally could go the rest of my life without ever watching a sport on tv or in real life, however, I do attend sporting events with my man and socialize. I do put it on the tv if we are hanging around the house and the game is on. As long as he is able to attend other events and does not refuse to go out when the "game is on" I will compromise.

I think often selfish people do not get it. If he does not want to dance.. so what. If she hates sports, so what. Learn to compromise a little. Go to the club and enjoy watching either the dance or the sport. Life is too short to focus on either.
 funny4uwannatry
Joined: 12/27/2011
Msg: 96 (view)
 
Separated status - does it really matter? Why?
Posted: 5/17/2013 7:34:41 AM
^^ Isn't that blaming every separated man for the bad acts of one? Not everyone who is separated acts that way, returns to the ex or has problem children.
 funny4uwannatry
Joined: 12/27/2011
Msg: 23 (view)
 
Most of those who claim to want a relationship play the most games ugh!
Posted: 5/17/2013 7:24:23 AM
^^ I agree. Do what works best for you and ignore others who tell you how to date. Expectations of going on a date merely to get sex is just something that either sets you up for disappointment or is not most likely going to end up in a long term relationship.

Some people are not looking for long term, they are looking for sex. If that works for them.. great. There are some looking for long term and some choose to wait for sex, some do not.

Its an individual choice and as long as both parties are being upfront and honest, both have the right to choose whether or not to continue dating each other.

I am not sure why those who demand sex up front can not understand that not everyone agrees with that. They have every right to choose that philosophy as some of us have every right not to.

I am not single, so my way of dating works for me I suppose.
 funny4uwannatry
Joined: 12/27/2011
Msg: 14 (view)
 
How much of a difference do pictures make?
Posted: 5/17/2013 7:10:59 AM
+1 Cowboy. Short and sweet meets are the way to go. If their pics are old or they do not appear at all to be the person you were talking to on line, one or two drinks and off you go.

Pics are important if you are trying to meet and date people on line. I do not think many people even bother with the profiles without photos.

When I was dating, I posted pictures. I am forums only now so its not that important.
 funny4uwannatry
Joined: 12/27/2011
Msg: 12 (view)
 
A man with ED? Questions please give info.
Posted: 5/17/2013 7:06:46 AM
I do not know how common it is, but when i was dating I only met one man who openly discussed it.

Would this be an issue? For me yes.. for some probably not.

Does Viagra work? I suppose it does because so many are using it.

The discussions you had with this man would most likely turn me off and I would be heading for the door, but this is just me.
 funny4uwannatry
Joined: 12/27/2011
Msg: 71 (view)
 
moving in after 3 days...can it really succeed?
Posted: 5/17/2013 6:59:03 AM
I would say she is crazy. This man has nothing to offer and appears to NEED her to support him. If he owns nothing.. I would say a huge red flag.

Most likely she will end up supporting this con man. Love in 3 days? really?

Your friend appears to have some real self esteem issues and is lacking common sense in this situation. She will most likely end up being used until he gets back on his feet, or she will end up supporting him forever.

Sad story.
 funny4uwannatry
Joined: 12/27/2011
Msg: 56 (view)
 
Face book- are you interested- serious fun ?
Posted: 5/17/2013 6:35:25 AM
I say ask her. Being direct and honest is the way I roll. I personally would be upset of I was dating someone for a significant period of time and exclusivity had been established, and they were still on either dating sites or outwardly flirting on FB.

Although I am dating someone now, he is aware that I write in forums, but I do not have a picture on the dating site, nor do I respond to any emails or flirts. If my writing in forums became an issues for him and our relationship, I would be sure to openly and honestly discuss it with him and listen to his desires.

To me, if flirting and the attention of others is more important than the relationship, its time to re-evaluate.
 funny4uwannatry
Joined: 12/27/2011
Msg: 21 (view)
 
Most of those who claim to want a relationship play the most games ugh!
Posted: 5/17/2013 6:26:36 AM
You totally missed the point Maleman999.. I said women are not cars or clothes.. we are people and do not wish to be treated like a car or an article of clothing. We are not possessions.

As for sex.. its not a matter of being good or bad in bed.. really how pathetic. I do not hate sex.. I just choose not to have casual sex. No man or woman has to stay with anyone who dislikes sex or is bad at it.

I have my requirements and I CHOOSE not to date men who immediately pressure for sex. Sex is a wonderful part of a RELATIONSHIP to me. If a man wants to jump in bed too soon and does not respect my RIGHT to decide when I am ready.. he has the RIGHT to move on. I CHOOSE not to be used or sampled.

The men I have dated throughout my life have always respected that. Most important, they respect me and I respect them.

If you choose to date with sex being one of your main priorities and demand it early in dating.. I say go for it. I also state it would be something I CHOOSE not to do.

Just because something works for you, does not make it universal. I did not say my way is the one and only right way.. I said it works for me. I do not get used, because I CHOOSE not to allow it.

Great sex comes when the RELATIONSHIP, TRUST and time is right. You ASSUME because someone waits they are bad at sex or they hate it.. POOR and WRONG assumption. Just because some people respect themselves and their bodies does not mean they are prudes and hate sex. How sad you believe that.

How twisted you think sex is a REWARD? Really? YUCK
 funny4uwannatry
Joined: 12/27/2011
Msg: 94 (view)
 
Separated status - does it really matter? Why?
Posted: 5/17/2013 5:59:57 AM
Just like so many of the other questions, the answer is what ever you personally feel comfortable with. I actually met the man I am currently dating on a different site. he was very honest and upfront about his separated status

He had been separated for almost 3 years and the soon to be ex lived in another state. He was merely waiting for the final divorce papers which actually came during our second week of dating.

I was not the rebound girlfriend as he dated a few others before we met and spent some time alone getting his life in order.
'
So it depends on individual circumstances.
 funny4uwannatry
Joined: 12/27/2011
Msg: 38 (view)
 
Trauma & dating
Posted: 5/17/2013 5:52:20 AM
Work on your self esteem before trying to date. Find a good counselor, read some self help books, but do the work. Most likely she picked up on your low self esteem and decided you were not a good match for her.

No one wants to pull someone up when dating. Nor do they want to have to fix a broken heart or broken self esteem. I suggest you fix what is broken and then you will find someone who will appreciate you and all you have been through to get there.
 funny4uwannatry
Joined: 12/27/2011
Msg: 26 (view)
 
How To Get Over Being Single and Happy, or Not
Posted: 5/17/2013 5:47:56 AM
There is nothing wrong with choosing to stay single. Some people are content that way. it is not your friends and relatives who will have to deal with your mate on a day to day basis so in my opinion, they do not count in your decision making.

Why feel guilty? If relationships do not make you feel good.. why enter one? I do suggest you work through your past relationships though, they were your choices and obviously not good ones. Not every man/woman is bad. not everyone will treat you poorly. Work on yourself and understanding what YOUR share in the failed relationships was.

Sometimes we have faulty "pickers", sometimes unrealistic expectations, sometimes we choose to ignore our gut feelings or the obvious.

If you are happy being single and doing your own thing.. keep doing it. There is no law that says you need a partner. if you would like a relationship, do the work on yourself first. Either way, just be happy.
 funny4uwannatry
Joined: 12/27/2011
Msg: 16 (view)
 
Most of those who claim to want a relationship play the most games ugh!
Posted: 5/17/2013 5:29:04 AM
Yes, some will try to play that game on line and in real life. On line its delete and block. In real life.. ignore.

I do not buy into the a man's time line for sex. It develops naturally over the course of a relationship. If he is not willing to wait, he is probably not worth your time.

So many women will write about the players who get them into bed early in dating ( before a relationship is even established) and then they disappear. My advice.. you can not be used if you do not let people use you.

For the males who believe they need to try out the merchandise.. well we not a cars and do not want our tires kicked. We are not an article of clothing you need to try on to see if we fit.

A healthy normal relationship develops naturally over time. Try getting to know someone a little bit first. That is what dating is all about. If a man or woman refuses to wait until both parties are ready to take the next step.. it probably won't work out anyway.

Not all men on line are like this, however I do suggest and highly recommend a paid dating site. Although there are some on those sites who do the same thing, I have been very successful in finding nice men who do not pressure for sex during emails or the first meeting or date.

POF is a free site and attracts quite a few odd ones. The 'weeding' process is often daunting.
 funny4uwannatry
Joined: 12/27/2011
Msg: 32 (view)
 
Things men and women don’t know about each other?
Posted: 5/17/2013 5:17:25 AM
There are only a couple I agree with.. I like men to make the first move and I do notice the jeans.. As for eating his dessert.. yuck.. not shaving my legs.. never happens. Expecting a card.. no, I always think its the thought that counts. If I wanted to sleep alone, I would stay single.

Every woman is unique, just as every man is. I think the best way to find out each other's likes and dislikes is to simply ask.

It was a fun read though.
 funny4uwannatry
Joined: 12/27/2011
Msg: 63 (view)
 
Proper/improper attire?
Posted: 5/12/2013 7:01:01 AM
Mechanics are nicer to have around too. I have to say he always knew where to go to have fun. I learned so much about cars and motorcycles, I impress many with my mechanical knowledge now. Some of the best dates I ever had were to car shows and motorcycle events. Sometimes people do stereotype men who work with their hands, and miss out out some terrific men.

BTW, his hands were often cleaner than mine.. gardening can be just as dirty!
 funny4uwannatry
Joined: 12/27/2011
Msg: 60 (view)
 
Proper/improper attire?
Posted: 5/11/2013 7:37:36 AM
Maffers: no offense intended. it just happens to be what he does for a living. I myself dated a body shop mechanic who was one of the best dressed men I ever dated. ( he cleaned up very well). No stereotyping was intended.
 funny4uwannatry
Joined: 12/27/2011
Msg: 36 (view)
 
I'm a ex convict, should I tell the people I date
Posted: 5/10/2013 7:47:38 AM
Although honest is the best policy, I agree with those who say timing is everything. I personally do not think you need to reveal this to everyone you meet, however if you think a relationship is developing, he or she has a right to know at that point.

As far as felonies goes, once a person completes their time and their probation of parole, they are free to associate with whom ever they choose.

I worked in a rehab for many years and there are many ex-cons who meet there daily. If an ex-con was not allowed to associate with anyone who ever committed a crime, they would not be able to associate with most of the people they meet in 12 step or rehabs. Some people do make big mistakes when they are young and dumb, but go on to live very productive lives.

If this was a one time offense, and not murder, or child molestation or other very serious crimes, personally, I would wait until you think there is a possibility of a relationship. Not everyone needs to know your business up front.

To me, there is a huge difference between a 1 time offense than repeated offenses. How long has it been? What have this person done to change and learn from their mistake?
 funny4uwannatry
Joined: 12/27/2011
Msg: 47 (view)
 
CONFUSING INTENTIONS
Posted: 5/10/2013 7:31:53 AM
Its not a male or female thing.. its just what some people do. The words "I don't know" are a bad sign. I think as an adult, you should know what you want. A person may not be sure they want you, but I would hope they know what they want.
 funny4uwannatry
Joined: 12/27/2011
Msg: 54 (view)
 
Had my first POF date last week. What happens now?
Posted: 5/10/2013 7:05:53 AM
I agree, a nice thank you text after the date would have been nicer. ( within 24 hours) Showing appreciation and gratitude is what I would call, the right thing to do. If a man does not respond with another suggestion to go out again, he was just not that interested.

I also agree you were lucky, you met a nice decent man who responded with manners even when he said, thanks but no thanks.
 funny4uwannatry
Joined: 12/27/2011
Msg: 188 (view)
 
About leagues. . .
Posted: 5/9/2013 7:12:10 AM
This is funny. Short men do not cheat? Really?

A short doctor will get more opportunities to cheat than a good looking, tall janitor. People cheat because they choose to cheat. Even short ugly ones find opportunities.

More of a matter of character than height if you ask me.
 funny4uwannatry
Joined: 12/27/2011
Msg: 46 (view)
 
Proper/improper attire?
Posted: 5/9/2013 6:45:38 AM
The shoes and black socks made me laugh.. Some men have no fashion sense at all. Personally, if you think he is a good guy, its time to tell him straight up about the clothes.

Sometimes men need a little encouragement concerning wardrobe. One of my closest friends is a fashion diva, she is now living with a man who is a mechanic. They are cute together and they stand out in a crowd. She dresses up for a picnic, while her man has nothing but Jeans, motorcycle t-shirts and flannels. She loves him to death. Her attitude is he always makes her look even better.

The point is, to decide whether or not you thinks its a deal breaker. My friend did not, she has been happy for 10 years now with her jeans and t-shirt guy. ( Although I am positive he does not own toe tennis shoes)
 funny4uwannatry
Joined: 12/27/2011
Msg: 25 (view)
 
Any advice would be appreciated...
Posted: 5/9/2013 6:34:18 AM
+1 Qt3.18
Sorry OP I would have to agree with her. You are using this woman for your own needs and ignoring hers. She has no control whether or not her children's father pays support. Nice to know that some men will give 100% blame to the mother while ignoring the fact she did not make the kids alone.

Do her and the children a huge favor and leave. Her life is tough enough without having a man think of her as a golddigger and her kids as a burden.

She could do so much better.
 funny4uwannatry
Joined: 12/27/2011
Msg: 30 (view)
 
Did I Blow It?
Posted: 5/8/2013 5:01:10 AM
Puglover: Podunk suburbs? This sounds like you are making negative judgmental comments concerning where she lives. Also sounds like you want a woman to come to you where it is convenient for you.

I also happen to live in a larger city, in the "podunk" suburbs. The man I am dating lives on the East side of the city in a small town, I live in the northern suburbs. Its approximately 45 minute drive on way. Our first meeting was closer to me because there was an event he wanted to attend.

He drives 45 minutes one way to see me. Makes time in his busy schedule (he is also a single parent) and does not complain. I have often offered to meet him half way or drive his way for dates, but more often, he travels to where I live.

Maybe she was not the "one" or maybe you want someone you do not have to do anything for? Who really knows but you.
 funny4uwannatry
Joined: 12/27/2011
Msg: 25 (view)
 
..He's 59...but doesn't act like it
Posted: 5/6/2013 5:26:53 AM
I agree you should not have tossed out his things or donated them. I would have boxed them and mailed them to him.

Some people are very childish after a break up. Personally, who cares what other people think. Move beyond it and ignore those who continue to gossip.
 funny4uwannatry
Joined: 12/27/2011
Msg: 12 (view)
 
nosepicking
Posted: 5/5/2013 4:59:22 PM
Wait until you get better and healthy yourself. You wont attract anyone who is healthy mentally, until you are healthy yourself. Be careful, there are some people out there who will seek you out right now because you are not stable and use or hurt you.

I am happy you are seeking help. When you feel better, you will attract healthier people.
 funny4uwannatry
Joined: 12/27/2011
Msg: 14 (view)
 
40
Posted: 4/1/2013 6:44:21 AM
Experiences are part of life, but so is forgiveness and the ability to stop holding life time grudges. No, it is not easy to move ahead, but at some point I think people need to stop blaming others and move on. What is the point of hating and blaming? Is it getting you anywhere? Why bother to date anyone else if you think love is a stupid waste of time and money? Yes, love sometimes hurts, but not every relationship ends up badly. I say learn from your mistakes and your past.. be careful, but do not give up or continue to hold onto the past like a blanket.. life does go on for some, some stay stuck and cant believe there are real honest people out there not looking to use anyone. I think you can waste your life blaming or look for someone who wont steal from you. For the female above.. try a prenuptial or just live together. There are ways to protect yourself without living in constant fear that others are out to get you.
 funny4uwannatry
Joined: 12/27/2011
Msg: 9 (view)
 
40
Posted: 4/1/2013 5:53:35 AM
Although I agree the older people have more life experiences, I would have to agree with OP, many are bitter and angry because the spend their life blaming their ex for all the ills of the world. I am divorced, but not bitter. I did not get a financial windfall, in fact ended up on welfare for a couple of years while I went to school so I could support my family. Not every female ends up with everything in a divorce. So I guess I could be bitter and angry about everything I lost, but I chose to move forward. I learned to be happy without credit cards and weekly trips to the nail salon. I learned my sanity was worth way more than anything I could buy in a store. I learned to take care of myself and be happy with the little things in life. I learned to forgive. I did not come on dating sites to spread my anger onto another man. I came to find someone to spend my life with. What I learned on POF was there are too many wounded soldiers who spend their time blaming the courts, blaming their ex and worse, blaming all women for their losses. I find it interesting that I never cheated or lied or did anything terrible in my marriage other than end it after trying with everything I had to save it. I do not blame him for all the ills of the world. It was a tough time that lead me to happiness. I found happiness in no longer having to deal with all the issues he had in this life that he refused to take care of himself, never mind me.
I met several men on this site who were obviously angry and blaming their ex for all the ills of the world and they were stuck in time, not able to move forward. Although a couple were really nice looking men, they had nothing but fear, anger and resentment to offer. I choose to pass. My point is for every man on here who is screaming foul, there is a woman who probably ended up raising the kids alone or had more of the responsibility of raising them, who did not end up rich after the divorce. Did all of these women cheat? Were all these divorces a direct result of only her wrong doing? I find that hard to believe. I think some men refuse to get help and refuse to see their role in the end of the relationship. It is easier to blame 100% on her. Funny. Odd. Sad.
 funny4uwannatry
Joined: 12/27/2011
Msg: 214 (view)
 
What Would Compell You To Marry After Age 45?
Posted: 4/1/2013 5:22:29 AM
I have continued to read many of the posts in forums and there seems to be a pattern of women hating and a real lack of forgiveness and acceptance of the past. I have read how many men are playing games with women's hearts like its a kind of trophy or a way to get even with the last woman who hurt them. Men who make fun of women who want to settle down and spend the rest of what is left with their lives with someone they love. Some women as well who write angry and bitter things about men and their lack of trust. Its all so very sad to me. I wish so many people on here could realize that bad times are a part of life, not meant to scar but rather to teach. They are meant to teach us things we need to learn rather than make us hate. For you Mr. P.. I would not want to be around anyone who brings me down or blames women for all the ills of the world. Although forums may be a place to vent, it also shows others who someone is inside. I am not surprised so many people in their late forties and up have broken relationships behind them, I am surprised at how many never work through their own problems and spread their angry on line and towards the people they say they would like to date. I know I do not want to be around such hate, nor would I want to deal with his past. I think we all have been hurt, but some do not seem to know how to move beyond that hurt and are spreading their anger to others, who did not hurt. I do not think I ever intentionally set out to hurt anyone, but it happens. I feel bad when I do hurt people. I know sometimes its hard to imagine that both people have fault in a failed relationship. This does not meant we have the right to spend the rest of our lives spreading hate. I think many people on this site have a lot to learn before they even begin to try and date again. I am not at all surprised now why so many of my dates we such a nightmare. Its hard to around unhappy people without becoming unhappy.
 funny4uwannatry
Joined: 12/27/2011
Msg: 12 (view)
 
actually meeting people in person
Posted: 3/31/2013 6:10:35 PM
I have found many people on here are just playing games. I did not waste time emailing back and forth for weeks. I suggest you get off this site as soon as you feel comfortable and set up meetings in public. If they refuse or make excuses, move on. Many men on here are married and just talking on her to women or trying to get sex. The other group of men are men who often could not get a date in real life. They are social inept and even when you do meet them you wish you had not. That leaves about maybe 5-10% of the men who are actually trying to meet someone to date or for a relationship. Then its all about compatibility. Datingon POF can be frustrating at best.
 funny4uwannatry
Joined: 12/27/2011
Msg: 42 (view)
 
What was dating like before cell phones and pagers?
Posted: 3/31/2013 6:04:17 PM
It was wonderful. A man actually called you before Wednesday to schedule a date with you. There were no distractions, just two people getting to know each other. Most of the time you had his undivided attention and he was not racing home to check and see if another woman responded to his e-mail or call. I think people actually enjoyed getting to know each other and were not constantly chasing another "dream". I loved those days, they were simpler and we knew our respective roles in dating. It was much harder to stalk someone back then as well. You could change your number and that was that. Men treated women with respect or they were dumped. ( my dad would have killed a man who disrespected me) Men knew what was expected of them, as did ladies. Now it seems to be a free for all. Men sending pictures of their body parts to women they don't know.. men expecting women to pay for their dinner on a date? Men and women hating each other for past relationships? Its all insane to me. I miss the good old days.
 funny4uwannatry
Joined: 12/27/2011
Msg: 41 (view)
 
Do you think that Internet Realtionship Survives
Posted: 3/31/2013 5:55:02 PM
I think they can work if you are talking about to mature individuals. From what I read on these forums, there does not seem to be a whole lot of maturity. If people can not devote their attention to just one other person, the relationship is doomed to fail. I see too many people who are staying on line with active profiles trying to meet more people when they claim they are in a relationship. I would not define "being in a relationship" as still trying to meet others. I think the internet dating has proved to be a bad thing for many people when the couple does not get off the dating site long enough to focus on working through issues. As soon as their is a disagreement, its back on line trying to find the next one.
 funny4uwannatry
Joined: 12/27/2011
Msg: 210 (view)
 
What Would Compell You To Marry After Age 45?
Posted: 3/31/2013 5:49:13 PM
How sad and tainted so many people seem to be on forums. I have been reading this post and a few others and it seems to me there are several people who have either lost all hope or are so scarred by their past relationships they seem unable and unwilling to even try. I am not sure if some people are trying to be funny or they are sincere when they write some of the things I have read. I think the world would be a lonely place for any of the people who are posting on here. I am divorced, but not forever scarred by it. In fact, I think the opposite of what many here say. I am not sure I would marry again, but I would live with a man again. I enjoy having someone to come home to, to do things with and sleep with. I would think its would be virtually impossible to meet anyone with the negative attitudes I have seen in these forums. I would guess more women are turning these men down because of what they say, more than because of how they look. I would run screaming int the other direction of some of the depressed and angry men who write in these forums, not because of how they appear, but because of how scarred and damaged they are.
 funny4uwannatry
Joined: 12/27/2011
Msg: 202 (view)
 
What Would Compell You To Marry After Age 45?
Posted: 3/31/2013 8:45:48 AM
Some people are left so pennyless they can not afford an attorney which is why some end up with less than nothing in a divorce. After a few years away from the divorce, I would think most people begin to heal and move on. Reading some of this posts makes me wonder why some are getting so stuck in the hatred and anger. I have to wonder how the children involved in these messes survive all the anger and hatred?
I am divorced and I do not think i got even close to half of the assets, but life went on anyway. I do not hate my ex husband and I do not think about who got more or who did better anymore. We both survived and moved on with our lives and what happened is over and done with now. I think carrying all that hatred and anger must be hard. I had more important things to focus on and I learned to be happy with all I had, not sad for the things I did not.
As for the who's job is worse? Are they serious?
 funny4uwannatry
Joined: 12/27/2011
Msg: 64 (view)
 
How can you date when you are SO bitter?
Posted: 3/31/2013 8:38:04 AM
I think people need to work on getting over their pasts, accepting their own mistakes or choices and move forward. How can someone who is angry and/or bitter be a good partner to the next person? agree everyone has the right to feel what ever way they want to for a period of time, but when they come on line to start dating , maybe some of them can work on their own issues first before trying to blame the next person they date. The change begins with thy self.
 funny4uwannatry
Joined: 12/27/2011
Msg: 62 (view)
 
How can you date when you are SO bitter?
Posted: 3/31/2013 7:32:25 AM
I do not think women dislike "nice guys". Maybe they dislike nice guys who act like stalkers or doormats or nice guys who lack social skills. Not "nice guys" in general. I personally do not like criminals, wife beaters, cheaters or "bad boys". Maybe there are actually men who are somewhere in between, Men who are capable of being a gentleman, yet fun and interesting. Maybe its not that women dislike good guys, I know I dislike being treated poorly and I did not date criminals, drug dealers, or what some are calling "bad boys". Maybe its not a war between nice guys and bad boys, but maybe a female just does not like bitterness which it what some of the males seem to being showing rather than being "nice" .
 funny4uwannatry
Joined: 12/27/2011
Msg: 197 (view)
 
What Would Compell You To Marry After Age 45?
Posted: 3/31/2013 7:22:59 AM
Hiding income is not exclusive to women in child support matters, in fact, the term "dead beat" daddy was coined after numerous men quit their jobs just to avoid paying child support. Although it does happen with women, I do not think carry a lifetime grudge against all women would be a good way of dealing with the problem. I see so much anger and hatred towards women from 2 of the male posters. I wonder why all women are seen as the problem when in fact more men default on child support than women do. I also do not see the connection with never marrying anyone because one woman or one man did something very wrong. After reading this entire post I hope there are still a few men left who do not blame women for all the ills of the world.
 funny4uwannatry
Joined: 12/27/2011
Msg: 180 (view)
 
What Would Compell You To Marry After Age 45?
Posted: 3/30/2013 4:33:29 PM
[/http://www.huffingtonpost.com/ken-solin/the-odds-are-against-wome_b_1011454.html]

I think the above was written by a man who facilitated men's groups. Its an interesting read for those who think an individual posting on this topic had has facts distorted and needs a little help getting beyond his anger
 funny4uwannatry
Joined: 12/27/2011
Msg: 39 (view)
 
Tired of the same bs... Do real relationships even exist anymore...
Posted: 2/25/2013 8:34:42 AM
I agree, I think too many on line daters are looking for the next best thing. It does make it more difficult to find and keep a good relationship when one or both are constantly looking on line to see who else is there.. who might offer me more? I am not sure how many do this, however, I would consider this a difficult hurdle to over come in any relationship.
 funny4uwannatry
Joined: 12/27/2011
Msg: 181 (view)
 
Whatever Happened to Romance/Courtship, etc.?
Posted: 2/24/2013 6:05:53 PM
Not every woman dates Bad Boys.. I wonder if some of the males who are saying this are not getting dates for other reasons, other than all the good women are with bad boys. I say take a long hard look at yourself and your need to change the kind of women you are targeting.. Maybe, just maybe, these men need to look within instead of blaming others. JMHO
 funny4uwannatry
Joined: 12/27/2011
Msg: 157 (view)
 
Whatever Happened to Romance/Courtship, etc.?
Posted: 2/24/2013 5:41:54 AM
Awe shucks.(Good manners - should be a natural thing
Holding a door open - I do this for both sexes, even once for a dog!
Smile - I do this so much people avoid me!
Be less mercenary - I never do anything thinking I'll get something back
Be less predatory - I can honestly say I've never chatted to a woman with a hidden agenda)

I agree 100%!! I do not think romance is gone, I think you need to find the one who is willing to be romantic with you. they exist!!
 funny4uwannatry
Joined: 12/27/2011
Msg: 22 (view)
 
Getting Blown Off vs. Reasonable Excuse
Posted: 2/24/2013 5:31:08 AM
If he reschedules, it may be reasonable if he does not,he blew you off. Yes, life sometimes happens and changes plans, however if it happens frequently, I would probably dump him for his inability to respect my time. I have only cancelled one meeting and i told the man straight up that he was creeping me out. As far as dates, I have rarely cancelled. If you are sick, well that is understandable. Called into work? Unlikely. Kids get sick.. probably. i guess it depends how much effort the person is putting into the relationship, how long I have been dating him. Once in a relationship, often these excuses are not there.
 funny4uwannatry
Joined: 12/27/2011
Msg: 21 (view)
 
dating my ex again after 10 years
Posted: 2/24/2013 5:18:35 AM
I am not one to venture backwards, however, after my father's death, his girlfriend of 6 years was truly heartbroken. When her only son died six month later, her ex husband was there to comfort her. They were divorced for 12 years. After comforting each other through this difficult time, the reunited. They are living together again after dating a year and have been happy for the past 10 years.. I never say never.
 funny4uwannatry
Joined: 12/27/2011
Msg: 54 (view)
 
Ending a date, whats the protocol?
Posted: 2/24/2013 5:15:33 AM
Everyone is different, but I always send a thank you text message once I get home from the "meeting". I let him know either I look forward to seeing him again or thank him for his time and state we are not a match and wish him well on his search.There are many different ways to handle this, but I personally think disappearing is rude and so is leaving someone hanging. Sometimes, if the meeting went very badly, both already know there will not be a second meeting. Sometimes, if things seemed to have gone well, the text may clear up and doubts on either side. I will say if a man waits days to let me know he is interested, I am no longer interested. Why? Because that is game playing in my opinion. I think if you are interested in a second meeting say so, and if not, say so. I do it after the meeting is over so there are no awkward moments if my date feels differently than I do. Some will say this is a cop put,I say, it works for me.
 
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