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 Author Thread: Please Review My Profile
 endsdawn
Joined: 3/21/2007
Msg: 10 (view)
 
Please Review My Profile
Posted: 5/27/2015 10:37:42 AM
I'll work on getting some better pics. Little frustrating because I'm actually smiling in three of those pics. That's just kinda' my face.

Regarding the height issue, yep, it sucks but there's nothing I can do about it.
 endsdawn
Joined: 3/21/2007
Msg: 6 (view)
 
Please Review My Profile
Posted: 5/26/2015 11:17:13 AM
Alright folks, I've rewritten everything. Please let me know what you think now.
 endsdawn
Joined: 3/21/2007
Msg: 4 (view)
 
Please Review My Profile
Posted: 5/25/2015 9:19:24 PM
I'm working on re-writing my profile. Just wanted to take a second and point out that almost every permanent resident and many of the seasonal workers on Mackinac Island have cars. They typically park them in indoor or outdoor parking lots on the mainland run by the ferry companies.
 endsdawn
Joined: 3/21/2007
Msg: 1 (view)
 
Please Review My Profile
Posted: 5/25/2015 10:47:17 AM
It's been a few years and I've written a new profile. I'm hoping this one is up to par and I'm definitely looking for some feedback. Thanks a lot folks.

http://www.pof.com/viewprofile.aspx?profile_id=3673637
 endsdawn
Joined: 3/21/2007
Msg: 19 (view)
 
Condom Conundrum
Posted: 2/24/2014 10:53:40 PM
I'd considered that but, to be honest, I barely do that anymore...
 endsdawn
Joined: 3/21/2007
Msg: 7 (view)
 
Condom Conundrum
Posted: 2/22/2014 11:16:54 AM
I am circumcised, I am using the right size, I am putting them on correctly, and I'm absolutely certain I didn't pick up with with the desensitizing stuff. I was careful to pick the thinnest ones that promised the most sensation because, as I said, I've had this problem before.
Also, since it's been pointed out, I don't masturbate excessively so I seriously doubt that's causing the problem. Being blunt, I might (maybe) do that once a week.

It's sounding like I'm going to have to research/try out some other brands of condoms or, failing that, other methods of birth control.
 endsdawn
Joined: 3/21/2007
Msg: 1 (view)
 
Condom Conundrum
Posted: 2/21/2014 9:50:58 PM
I'm curious to hear your folks input on something:

Considering the possibility of contracting an STD or accidentally getting a woman pregnant, I usually try to buy and use condoms. My problem is that condoms completely kill the experience for me.

Amazingly, I had sex today. Believe me, I'm as surprised as you folks probably are. Anyway, after we started I realized I couldn't feel anything through the condom. I'm not talking a "slight loss in sensation" like people usually describe when talking about condoms. I'm talking a complete lack of sensation other than a bit of pressure. Nothing pleasurable at all. For all intents and purposes, I could just as well have been sitting there fully clothed, not doing anything, from what I could feel. She seemed to be enjoying herself but, to be honest, that's only entertaining for a short while when you know that you should be enjoying the experience as well.

Does anyone else have this problem? If so, how have you overcome it? Are there any specific brands of condoms that work better? I've tried quite a few different brands over the last few years and always run into this problem...
 endsdawn
Joined: 3/21/2007
Msg: 17 (view)
 
Valentine's Day Question
Posted: 2/3/2014 11:08:15 PM
I honestly don't care if she does anything for me in return or not. I doubt she's thinking about doing anything for Valentine's Day and I know she doesn't expect anything. She mentioned it in a facebook post from before we met. I just want to surprise her. Make her day a little brighter, you know? That in itself will make my day anyway.
 endsdawn
Joined: 3/21/2007
Msg: 5 (view)
 
Valentine's Day Question
Posted: 2/3/2014 12:59:13 AM
Thanks folks! I wanted to do something for her but wasn't quite sure if it was appropriate yet. I certainly didn't want to come on too strong and scare her off.

I think, per your suggestions, I'll get her a (non-mushy) card and perhaps a pink rose? That seems fitting from what I've read. Thankfully, there are a few good websites about rose colors and their meanings.

Thanks again folks!
 endsdawn
Joined: 3/21/2007
Msg: 1 (view)
 
Valentine's Day Question
Posted: 2/2/2014 8:03:55 PM
Alright, I've been talking to this gal for a few days and things are going very well! We're supposed to have our first date in a few days and I suspect it'll go great. We get along really well.

That said, Valentine's Day is coming up and I know that she's bummed she doesn't have a valentine. If things are still going well, would it be a good idea to get her something for Valentine's Day or is it still too soon?

Thanks folks!
 endsdawn
Joined: 3/21/2007
Msg: 39 (view)
 
Women/Hot Potatoes
Posted: 11/24/2013 5:24:21 PM
Like you said, I probably should have just ended things back when I first found out. The problem is, to put it bluntly, I suck at this whole dating/relationship thing. Maybe one of these days I'll figure it out and get it right. Here's hoping.
 endsdawn
Joined: 3/21/2007
Msg: 26 (view)
 
Women/Hot Potatoes
Posted: 11/20/2013 2:43:11 PM
Actually, the more I've been thinking about it, the more I've been wondering that same thing. I'm starting to think I was the odd man out, which really pisses me off.

Hopefully one of these days I'll have a decent dating experience/relationship. I'm trying hard not to feel sorry for myself right now, but I seem to have zero luck with women anymore (always seem to find the wrong type) and it's really getting to me these days.
 endsdawn
Joined: 3/21/2007
Msg: 22 (view)
 
Women/Hot Potatoes
Posted: 11/19/2013 10:24:34 PM
Yeah, we were supposed to be exclusive. I don't know why she did what she did, but it really sucked. Time to move on though. I ranted about it, drank away some pain, regretted it the next morning (much like I regret the wasted month), and am moving on.

I sat here for ten minutes looking up potato varieties and various methods of cooking them. In the end, I was going to assemble some sort of perverted joke revolving around fingerling potatoes, but things wouldn't mash together.
 endsdawn
Joined: 3/21/2007
Msg: 18 (view)
 
Women/Hot Potatoes
Posted: 11/18/2013 10:50:04 PM
Alright, the last few potato puns are killing me. Good job.
 endsdawn
Joined: 3/21/2007
Msg: 14 (view)
 
Women/Hot Potatoes
Posted: 11/18/2013 5:21:27 PM
I really cared about her, so I just acted normal and waited a while to see if she would just tell me about it but she didn't. Then, finally, I confronted her about it and at first she tried to lie saying that it never happened. Then she admitted to it and said it was "complicated" as if that somehow made it okay! So I told her we were done.
 endsdawn
Joined: 3/21/2007
Msg: 12 (view)
 
Women/Hot Potatoes
Posted: 11/18/2013 3:33:31 PM
I don't know if it'll help anyone else. It kinda' helped me though, writing all this out.

Maybe I hoped some woman who does this sort of thing would read it and rethink her actions? I don't know.
 endsdawn
Joined: 3/21/2007
Msg: 8 (view)
 
Women/Hot Potatoes
Posted: 11/18/2013 3:02:24 PM
Actually, I've thought of a question. Why do women think any of that is okay?
 endsdawn
Joined: 3/21/2007
Msg: 7 (view)
 
Women/Hot Potatoes
Posted: 11/18/2013 3:01:22 PM
More like I found out she was cheating and waited to see if she'd come clean about it. When I finally confronted her about it, she tried to deny it at first than said it was "complicated".
 endsdawn
Joined: 3/21/2007
Msg: 5 (view)
 
Women/Hot Potatoes
Posted: 11/18/2013 2:57:35 PM
I don't have a question. I just wanted to post about my most recent breakup somewhere. Just get my thoughts out there. This seemed like the best place. Wouldn't questions belong more in the Dating & Love Advice forum anyway?

Oh, and ForumFiona, I found out she was cheating on me, then she lied about it and tried to play some mindgames, saying things were "complicated." I was nothing but sweet and kind to her up until that point, so...
 endsdawn
Joined: 3/21/2007
Msg: 1 (view)
 
Women/Hot Potatoes
Posted: 11/18/2013 2:23:28 PM
Well, I had a girlfriend for about a month and I've just ended things. Here's a little something I wrote about the experience.

Here are a few tips for women about dealing with guys:

Firstly, don't lie to us. If you do, we *will* eventually find out. We aren't as dumb as you think we are and when we catch you in those lies, we'll probably drop you like a hot potato.

Second, if you think you've gotten away with a lie for a while, don't be so certain. Chances are that we know and we're simply waiting, giving you a chance to make things right. If you don't, and soon, we'll probably drop you like a hot potato.

Third, don't manipulate us. You may think you've gotten away with it, but I promise you haven't. We know what you're doing and we don't like it. We'll tolerate it to a certain extent, but eventually we'll grow tired of it and drop you like a hot potato.

Fourth, don't play mind games with us. We don't think like you do a lot of the time, preferring reason and logic. Your little emotional games are annoying at best and infuriating at worst. You may find it amusing. We don't. If you make us ride your mental/emotional roller-coaster, eventually we'll grow tired of it and drop you like a hot potato.

Fifth and lastly, when we do drop you like the aforementioned hot potato, no, those tears won't work as well as you think they do. They're a lie in and of themselves. We know you aren't crying because you've lost us. You're crying because we finally called you out on your lies and bullcrap. You won't manipulate us into feeling bad for you either. We're not playing those mind games anymore.

If you screw up like my lady did, well, enjoy single life.
 endsdawn
Joined: 3/21/2007
Msg: 17 (view)
 
Shallow/Unfair?
Posted: 9/12/2013 3:07:23 AM
How exactly am I wasting anyone's time?
 endsdawn
Joined: 3/21/2007
Msg: 11 (view)
 
Shallow/Unfair?
Posted: 9/11/2013 7:43:43 PM
Thanks folks. Thanks tons really. You've made me feel a lot better about this particular topic.
 endsdawn
Joined: 3/21/2007
Msg: 22 (view)
 
What the...?
Posted: 9/11/2013 6:29:45 PM

Have you tried telephoning and/or visiting her to learn her observations from what happened?


She called me (even though I told her not to) and I decided to see if she'd tell me the truth. She tried to pretend like it was a normal day, like nothing happened. When I started asking questions, the lies started.
"So why did you invite Kyle (her ex) over?" I asked, to which she claimed she never done so. Supposedly, he had called her, informing her he was on his way to her house. A load of lies since he still has the texts she sent him last night, inviting him over.
"I'm sure Kyle beat the crap out of himself, right?" I asked. She claimed that he had, in fact, randomly started punching himself. Considering he's pretty roughed up, and has defensive wounds, it was yet another lie.
"And no one swung a baseball bat at John?" I asked again, and she got quiet for a moment. One could almost hear the gears turning in her head. She suddenly said, "I don't know *where* the baseball bat came from, but no one used it or anything." Considering that John was confronted outside the front door and never got into the house, how did he even know it was there if it wasn't brought outside?
Finally, I asked her, "So why were there four guys you barely know alone in your house with you last night?" And she got quiet.

I hung up and she hasn't tried to call me back.
 endsdawn
Joined: 3/21/2007
Msg: 7 (view)
 
Shallow/Unfair?
Posted: 9/11/2013 5:49:49 PM
Thanks folks. I feel a bit better about things now.
 endsdawn
Joined: 3/21/2007
Msg: 3 (view)
 
Shallow/Unfair?
Posted: 9/11/2013 4:28:49 PM
This exact question is why I asked, elsewhere, if there were any way to delete all my old threads. People have an annoying propensity on this website to ignore the topic at hand, and instead delve into the past.
 endsdawn
Joined: 3/21/2007
Msg: 1 (view)
 
Shallow/Unfair?
Posted: 9/11/2013 4:16:39 PM
So, there's something that's been on my mind lately, where dating is concerned. I hope I don't offend anyone here, and apologize in advance if I do. But, for context, here is a bit of background information:
I'm a live-in caregiver right now, helping my Grandparents. My Grandfather has Alzheimer's (which is slowly progressing) and my Grandmother is obese. We all but begged her for as long as I can remember to lose the weight, but she only ever got worse. Now, it's effected her health to where she can barely walk, is having some congestive heart failure, has trouble with swelling, has to be on oxygen 24/7, etc.

Now, my best friend and his wife are large folks as well and, a while back, we got talking about my dating habits. They wanted to set me up with someone who was around 5'5 and weighed around 340 pounds. When I told them I wasn't interested, largely because of her weight, they got mad. My best friend said, "You're nothing special. You need to lower your standards."

Now, I know I'm nothing special. Heck, I'm short, am prematurely balding, and I've got some bad teeth, so I know. But all I could think about, when picturing dating an obese woman, is all the health problems my Grandma is having now because of carrying so much weight around for all those years. I mean, I also just plain don't find obese women attractive either, so...

My question is this: Do you think this is shallow? Am I being unfair? I've really been questioning myself today and am curious what you all think.
 endsdawn
Joined: 3/21/2007
Msg: 20 (view)
 
What the...?
Posted: 9/11/2013 3:18:56 PM
I'm definitely signing up for some counseling. I'd been thinking about it for about a month now, and finally looked into it today. Hopefully I'll get some stuff sorted out. If nothing else, I could certainly use someone objective to talk too.

Thanks for the advice. I'm trying not to let this bother me, but it's kinda' hard for a few different reasons.
 endsdawn
Joined: 3/21/2007
Msg: 2 (view)
 
Deleting my old threads/posts?
Posted: 9/11/2013 2:40:07 PM
That's a bummer. People keep going back to posts I made over a year ago, from when I was really in a weird place emotionally. I wish I could delete *all* my old posts.
 endsdawn
Joined: 3/21/2007
Msg: 17 (view)
 
What the...?
Posted: 9/11/2013 2:37:06 PM
3ffervescent: Thank you.
 endsdawn
Joined: 3/21/2007
Msg: 1 (view)
 
Deleting my old threads/posts?
Posted: 9/11/2013 2:17:22 PM
Is there any way I can delete my old threads/posts? My latest topic has been getting trolled and I'm tired of it, just want to delete it all. I've been browsing around, but can't seem to find anything on how to do so. The search function doesn't seem to be working for me either for some reason. Help?
 endsdawn
Joined: 3/21/2007
Msg: 16 (view)
 
What the...?
Posted: 9/11/2013 2:07:17 PM
You know, I'm really getting sick of you guys calling me a troll. Believe the story or not, your choice. It's true though, and I just posted about it because all this has really gotten to me. Most of you aren't helping in the slightest though, are only making me feel worse. You remind me of school yard bullies and need to grow up.
Point is, if you can't actually say something relevant, and can only insult, don't bother. Don't even read any more. Just go away.
 endsdawn
Joined: 3/21/2007
Msg: 15 (view)
 
What the...?
Posted: 9/11/2013 1:53:39 PM
I'm not trying to troll anyone. When it comes to relationships, I *am* pretty damned naive, to be bluntly honest. I never really dated until I was in my mid 20s, and I haven't really done much of it even then. I don't quite get how this whole mess works, though I'm trying to figure it out.
I also suffer from depression, which doesn't help, as the thing that bothers me the most is being alone. When I do get into a relationship, I tend to put up with way more crap than I should. I'm working on getting better about that...
Anyway, you recommended therapy and you're not far off. I do have a few problems with anxiety, depression, and the like. I've been looking into signing up for counseling, so hopefully I'll be able to get some things figured out.

Oh, and to the person who claimed her little orgy was a fantasy. I don't think I've ever mentioned it on here, but I have a mild case of obsessive-compulsive disorder. It triggers on messes, dirty things, and the like. Getting hershey's syrup all over me would be a complete nightmare. Not my idea of sexy in the slightest.
I don't find the idea of her with four guys sexy in the slightest either. Disgusting, to be honest. I had thought better of her.

gcdeb: She called me and I simply told her never to contact me again and hung up. I won't be going to see her.
 endsdawn
Joined: 3/21/2007
Msg: 13 (view)
 
What the...?
Posted: 9/11/2013 1:33:31 PM
When she texted me pics of her bits, I didn't really know what to think. I was her boyfriend at the time, so I thought she was coming on to me, but apparently not? It was strange, to say the least. Like I said, the only reason I put up with it is because I was lonely. I've been single for a few years now, and... Well, that's pretty much sums it up.

Anyway, no, there is absolutely no chance I'd do anything sexual with her now. If we were still together, and none of this had happened? Probably.
Now that all this has happened? Not a chance.
I just finished severing all ties with her. I told her never to contact me again, unfriended and blocked her (and her friends) on facebook, deleted her number out of my phone, etc.
Contrary to how things may seem, I have standards. I've only ever, in the 26 years I've been on this world, had sex with two women. I was engaged to the first one. The second was a one-night stand when I was feeling particularly down about things. A mistake I never care to repeat.
 endsdawn
Joined: 3/21/2007
Msg: 9 (view)
 
What the...?
Posted: 9/11/2013 1:02:41 PM
John is in his 40s and, to my knowledge, has no sexual interest in Ashley. She had been engaged to his nephew, and I suppose he felt more like an Uncle to her than anything, although I doubt he feels so kindly towards her now. So no, he got the heck out of there after that. From what I understand, he went home and called my mom to talk to her about what had happened. That's how I initially found out about it all.
And no, he's not like one of those guys. He's a decent person with a strong moral compass.

But anyway, you're right, she wasn't my girlfriend by this point... But from the way things were going, it was kind of assumed we'd get back together at some point. Like we were concentrating on being friends first, then getting together again when she was ready.
No chance of that now though. I texted her a bit ago and told her never to contact me again. If I've learned one thing, it's that she's a toxic person, and far too good at lying. I won't be talking to her anymore.
 endsdawn
Joined: 3/21/2007
Msg: 7 (view)
 
What the...?
Posted: 9/11/2013 12:50:49 PM
From what I understand of the situation, John was banging on the door for a bit, shouting Ashley's name. Two of the guys came out, presumably to chase him off? One had a baseball bat and took the first swing. They probably didn't expect to get their butts handed to them, but John is a very tough fellow (and apparently a much better friend than Ashley deserves).

I can't quite figure out what was going on in her head, or why she didn't at least throw on a robe or something while she was running out the door. Sometimes people do really dumb crap though.

And no. I was never invited to play. She teased me constantly about sex while we were together, hinting that we would do it, even sent me photos of her, um, anatomy. But we never did anything. I suppose I put up with it because I was lonely. I'm glad I didn't have sex with her though. Knowing what I know now, it's likely I would have caught something.
 endsdawn
Joined: 3/21/2007
Msg: 5 (view)
 
What the...?
Posted: 9/11/2013 12:30:49 PM
Wow... Rereading this, it is pretty unbelievable. Just goes to show how messed up people can be sometimes. If I wasn't part of this story, I doubt I'd believe it either.
 endsdawn
Joined: 3/21/2007
Msg: 4 (view)
 
What the...?
Posted: 9/11/2013 12:14:39 PM
Wow... You guys are so wonderful to talk to. I'm pretty upset by all this and you guys are being rotten... Wonderful. Do you treat everyone in the forum this way? Get off on beating people while they're down?

I may not have detailed what happened between my last post and this one, but that doesn't make things any less true.
 endsdawn
Joined: 3/21/2007
Msg: 1 (view)
 
What the...?
Posted: 9/11/2013 11:44:36 AM
I'm in shock this morning and don't know how to react.

So I was with this girl named Ashley for about two months and, while I know it's stupid, I had developed some feelings for her. What can I say? I was lonely and she seemed a nice fit for that void in my life... Now, she had just come out of a relationship and I didn't quite think she was ready to be with me 100%, so we decided to just "be friends" for awhile, to let her get back on her feet emotionally. We still talk for an hour or two every day, have been hanging out like nothing had changed, etc. It was pretty much a given that we'd be officially back together at some point... Until this morning.

I've just found out that last night, she invited her ex-boyfriend Kyle over. Why? Well, when he got there four guys jumped him and beat the crap outta' him. Afterwords, he limped home and told his uncle John (a good friend of my family) about it. John, being friends with Ashley, got worried. Thinking she might be in some sort of trouble (what with four violent guys in her house) he rushed over there and knocked on the door. One of the guys came out swinging a baseball bat! Well, he and the guy who stepped out after him both got their butts handed to them by John... And that's when Ashley came flying out of the house, butt-naked, covered in chocolate syrup, and jumped on John, yelling at him, "These are my friends! Stop hurting them!" John stopped then and left, disgusted.

So yep... The only girl I've had any sort of a relationship with in years, and she's gone behind my back, had her ex beaten up, then got in an orgy with four guys she barely knows...

...You know, it's not so much that she betrayed my trust here. It's that I could develop for someone who is apparently so screwed up... Makes me feel like a failure at life in general. I should have seen her for what she is sooner. The signs were there and I ignored them... Now I feel like I'm watching an episode of Jerry Springer play out in my own town... God...
 endsdawn
Joined: 3/21/2007
Msg: 105 (view)
 
What's the REAL reason we're single?
Posted: 8/6/2013 10:38:11 PM
I think mine is a combination of my physical appearance and being too nice/accessible. I'm short, starting to lose my hair, and have bad teeth. My personality usually makes up for that, but after a while, most women take me for granted because I'm too nice, too forgiving. It seems they want to have to fight for something, and I make it too easy or something. *shrugs*
 endsdawn
Joined: 3/21/2007
Msg: 15 (view)
 
Too soon? Confused.
Posted: 8/6/2013 10:22:22 PM
Well, things with her went south, as I should have expected. She used that classic phrase (one of the few things a woman can say that will instantly make me drop them like a hot potato) "If you loved me, you'd..."

I'll put up with a lot and, believe me, with her I had been. That sort of selfish, immature, emotional manipulation? Nope. Screw that. Her and I are over.

Onward and upward. Thinking I might move!
 endsdawn
Joined: 3/21/2007
Msg: 8 (view)
 
Too soon? Confused.
Posted: 7/1/2013 8:27:56 AM
Could be that I am just in the wrong place at the wrong time. I'm not sure. *shrugs*

I do, however, know her ex and know there is no chance of them getting back together. He treated her like complete and utter crap, was verbally abusive, etc. for months before they finally split up. She specifically doesn't want him to know about us, for fear he would get jealous and she'd have even more drama in her life.
 endsdawn
Joined: 3/21/2007
Msg: 5 (view)
 
Too soon? Confused.
Posted: 7/1/2013 5:15:21 AM
Thanks IgorFrankensteen. That's some of the best advice I've gotten from anybody regarding the situation so far.
 endsdawn
Joined: 3/21/2007
Msg: 3 (view)
 
Too soon? Confused.
Posted: 7/1/2013 12:01:49 AM
It is complicated, and it is driving me a bit batty... But I've grown quite attached to her, and I'm not giving up on this yet, especially when I consider the other opportunity (see my previous post) I gave up to be with her.
 endsdawn
Joined: 3/21/2007
Msg: 1 (view)
 
Too soon? Confused.
Posted: 6/30/2013 11:31:27 PM
I'm having an odd time with my girlfriend Ashley and could use some advice. You guys helped me a bit ago and I'm hoping you can do it again.

Ashley and I were talking for around two months before we started going out. I became close friends with her while she was still in an abusive relationship, stuck with her when he left her in the dust. To my surprise and elation, once she was free of that jerk and had cleared her head a bit, she decided she wanted to date me!

We had our first official date a few days back, which was fairly awkward. It was obvious she was having trouble adjusting to someone new, though she made quite the effort. She sent me a text that night saying that she needed more time before we dated.
The next day, she apologized and said she really was ready to move on and start something new. We had an amazing day out together! I mean, truly amazing. Almost perfect. She asked me that night, if we could "make things official" meaning to become boyfriend/girlfriend. Things were moving a bit quickly, but I'm alright with it. I knew her pretty well by this point, and really wanted to have her in my life, so I agreed.

Now, I'm a very physically affectionate person. Lots of hugging, cuddling, kissing, etc. I love it! Sex, to me, just seems like a natural progression in a relationship and whenever it happens, I'm usually ready for it. I don't push the issue at all though, and tend to let thing develop naturally.

This morning, Ashley (whom I haven't had sex with yet) tells me that she needs to slow things down and isn't ready for sex yet. Considering I hadn't been planning on bedtime activities yet, I wasn't too disappointed or anything. I told her the simple truth: That we can go at her pace. When she's ready, I'll be ready. She's got all the time she wants to figure things out and all she needs to do is let me know when she thinks she's ready. While I'll admit, I'd love to have sex with her, I'm in no hurry. I want her to be as ready for it as I am.

Talking to her tonight, she brings up the topic again and says she's ready. Now I'm a bit confused, I mean, didn't she just say she wasn't ready yet this very morning? That seemed a bit quick. I asked her again, just to make sure, and she says "I just didn't think you were ready yet. If you are, I've been ready all along."

What... The... Heck...? I'm super confused, and would love some input on this. Especially from you lady folks. My best guess is that, like that moment after our first date, she was feeling a little uncomfortable with things moving quickly but came to terms with it? I know she's afraid of being hurt again, like in her last relationship. I spent some time today reassuring her, letting her know that that is the last thing I want to happen. Maybe that's what did it? I just don't know.

Thoughts?
 endsdawn
Joined: 3/21/2007
Msg: 10 (view)
 
Help!
Posted: 6/28/2013 8:47:08 AM
SunDevil29072 actually made me stop and think for a moment, but it is the women in particular that I'm interested in and being with either comes with it's own set of pros and cons.

In the end, I chose Ashley because I'm not at a point in my life where I can take care of a girlfriend (eventually a wife) *and* two kids, whereas starting out with a new, less complicated (for the time being) relationship sounds perfect.

Oh, and yeah, both women already knew I'm heading to Vail.
 endsdawn
Joined: 3/21/2007
Msg: 6 (view)
 
Help!
Posted: 6/27/2013 5:25:34 PM
I'm moving for a job. There is very little to no available work here.
 endsdawn
Joined: 3/21/2007
Msg: 3 (view)
 
Help!
Posted: 6/27/2013 4:49:51 PM
The relationship between Rachel and I went bad due to some immaturity, mostly on my part, as well as some petty things we argued about. I've grown as a person a lot in the last couple of years, and we've both apologized for the mistakes we made. There was also an issue with her family, her sister living with her, and her mother being an all-pervasive controlling element in her life. Now her sister has moved out and she specifically wants to get away from her mom. She's also been talking about wanting to move to Colorado anyway, so there's that...

Ashley, on the other hand, wants to get away for a while. She's been talking about moving somewhere, anywhere really, just to get a new start. I honestly think it'd be pretty easy to talk her into going with me.

Oh, I should also note that I'm not moving until November, so there's that to consider...
 endsdawn
Joined: 3/21/2007
Msg: 1 (view)
 
Help!
Posted: 6/27/2013 3:43:19 PM
Alright, so I've got a situation and I desperately need advice:

I've been talking to a 20 year-old girl named Ashley for a couple of months. We get along well, enjoy some of the same things, and had become good friends. We would have been more, but she was in a relationship. Long story short, she is now single.

I've also been talking to my own ex-girlfriend Rachel. She's 25 and has two wonderful kids. We too get along well, enjoy many of the same things, and had become good friends again after a couple of years apart. She was also in a relationship until recently and, just like Ashley, is now single.

I had been pretty depressed lately, wishing I had someone, but had resolved to move on with my life and am making plans to move with my best friend and his wife to Vail, CO. for the winter.
Suddenly, within the last 24 hours (actually within an hour or two of each other) both women revealed that they want to be in a relationship with me. At first, I felt like the luckiest guy in the world! I'd gone from having no one, to having the two women I wanted more than anyone else! They both want to be with me!
...And that's when it occurred to me. They both want to be with me... Crap... I'm not a huge douche bag. I'm very much into having only one girlfriend, being in a monogamous relationship... So now I have to hurt one of these amazing women...

My best friend and his wife are friends with Rachel, and are practically trying to force her and I together. My family, on the other hand, doesn't like her because of how things ended between us before and is against her.
My family love Ashley, but my best friend and his wife don't care for her at all.
Rachel is locked to this area, working in a Wal-Mart, raising her two children.
Ashley, on the other hand, doesn't have anything tying her down.
Etc. Etc. Etc.

I've been weighing pros and cons all morning, trying to figure out what I want to do, and I'm no less confused or any closer to choosing than I was when I woke up this morning.

Please, folks. Any advice you can offer is greatly needed.
 endsdawn
Joined: 3/21/2007
Msg: 3 (view)
 
What to do?
Posted: 5/21/2013 10:09:14 PM
I think I gave the wrong impression about her here. The guy knew she was out fishing, he just chose to call her up and rage about it. She's not the game-playing type. She's more of, well, stuck in a bad situation and trying to make the best of it? That's the best way I can describe it. She's kinda' on the naive side. One of those people who is so sweet that some people take advantage/abuse her because of it.

Anyway, as far as my mom goes, it was coincidence that I even ended up meeting this girl. She wasn't originally going to introduce us. It just, well, happened.
And as far as getting girls without help goes... I think I need all the help I can get. I've got pretty much zero experience with the whole dating thing and the only one I've gotten myself in the last couple of years turned out to be a morbidly obese woman with poor hygiene who only wanted to go on a date in order to get someone into bed. She wanted to get revenge of some sort and make her boyfriend (who is in prison) jealous. I wish I were joking.
 endsdawn
Joined: 3/21/2007
Msg: 1 (view)
 
What to do?
Posted: 5/21/2013 9:15:07 PM
Alright, let me start with a bit of back-story. My mother and I were in a gas station about two weeks ago and, for some reason, I was trying to describe what sort of girl was my type physically. It just so happened that I walked a few feet away and saw an absolutely perfect example. I started to covertly point her out when my mom suddenly waved her over and introduced us. Turns out she's a friend of my mom's. The same one my mom told me tons about and who sounded amazing. The same one my mom had said "If she weren't engaged, I'd love to set you two up. You'd be perfect for each other!"

Fast forward about a week. The girl (We'll call her Ash) needed to get out of the house so tagged along with my mom and I fishing. We were having a great time, carrying on, laughing and such. But while we were out there, Ash got a call from her fiancee (whom she put on speaker for us to hear). This is an approximate, shortened version of what he had to say: "Where the @#$% are you? You should be home doing dishes! You're out fishing!? Why the @#$% are you out fishing!? You should be at home doing @#$% work!" and it basically went on like that, the guy being a total jerk, making her feel like crap over the next twenty minutes for daring to take five minutes for herself and do something fun. This is apparently pretty frequent behavior too.

Now, I'm really, really, really interested in her. I'd do almost anything to be with her. And it's rough, seeing her stuck in a relationship with such a verbally abusive tool.

Fast forward a bit more to last night. I was telling my best friends about her and they asked "Is she on your facebook?" To which I responded, "No..." They asked, "Do you have her phone number?" To which I again responded with "No..." The kicker was that about twenty minutes later, she adds me on facebook and sends me her phone number in a message! For the last 24 hours, she's been sending me messages off and on. It seems like simply friendly stuff, but I don't know. It just seems odd to me that she'd do all that so suddenly...

I don't know what to think or do here folks. I'm scared of saying or doing the wrong thing. I mean, do I try to save her from the douche? Do I wait and see what happens? Do I back the heck off and leave them alone? I just don't know. It'd be an understatement to say I have no experience with this sort of situation.

What I do know is that seeing her, such an amazing woman, stuck with that absolute @#$hole is really upsetting.

Any advice?
 
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