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 Author Thread: Gym Etiquette?
 zooteenyc
Joined: 4/22/2007
Msg: 19 (view)
 
Gym Etiquette?
Posted: 4/6/2008 2:56:54 PM
Hi,
It is funny you mention about getting sick. I have been going to this gym a little over two months now. So far, I have gotten sick twice. Before going to the gym, I havent been sick in over a year. I use towels when using the suana and steam room and I wipe down the threadmill machines. I find it almost hilarious, how I am working out to get into shape and feel better about myself and so far all I have accomplished is getting sick. When that happens I am not up for the gym, so when I go back, its like starting all over again.

Someone has suggested taking vitamins, since working out can be putting a drian on my system. What do you think?
 zooteenyc
Joined: 4/22/2007
Msg: 1 (view)
 
Cover Your Cough!
Posted: 3/19/2008 11:13:13 AM
Hi,
I have to ask, were you taught to cover your cough and why?

I was always told, when I was a child, that I should ALWAYS cover my mouth when I cough. As I got older, I learned that it wasn't just manners, but also a matter of health.

I have come across a number of individuals that claim they shouldn't have to cover thier mouth because it is allergies and not a cold, etc. etc. etc.
We end up doing one of these.....
 zooteenyc
Joined: 4/22/2007
Msg: 14 (view)
 
Gym Etiquette?
Posted: 3/19/2008 11:00:06 AM
At one of my local YMCAs, fathers were bringing their young daughters into the mens change room so they can use the hot tub that was located in the change room (you use it naked) and change with them.


I havent seen any little boys in the steam room of suana. I think I would be extremely upset at this. Then again I would be upset if I was in the hot tub and a bunch of naked ladies entered...lol.

I remember being told that the hot tub is not good for children, a health risk. If this is true, you could probably report them to some agency or the health department. I bet the YMCA would care then...lol.

If it isn't a health issue, I still think it could lead to some form of emotional problems for the child growing up. (The idea that it is okay for strangers to expose themselves to minors, etc...)
 zooteenyc
Joined: 4/22/2007
Msg: 8 (view)
 
Gym Etiquette?
Posted: 3/8/2008 12:28:30 PM
At my gym, there are a few of these obsessive compulsive people.


Just for your info I am not afraid of germs. If you knew me you would know that, but since you don’t, you can assume all you want....you know where that gets you though.

What my post was about respect, and the sauna and steam room. Only because they are butt naked...and under those conditions and wood and steam....etc.
I am not too worried about the machines because I have clothes on, and to me that’s a layer of protection and a towel...


I am sure this same woman doesn't practice that kind of thing when she touches shopping carts or when she uses an ATM.


If they use their a** to push the cart and use the atm...hell yes I would use a wipe..hmm... I would probably bring my own cart and use checks...lol.

And yes I use the protection covers when I use public restrooms, and if they don’t have them there, I make my own...

Just because we are in a gym, I don't feel people should have the right to be rude and have no respect for others. It is not your personal gym, sauna, steam room or pool for that matter, and I believe we should be respectful of the other users.
 zooteenyc
Joined: 4/22/2007
Msg: 7 (view)
 
Gym Etiquette?
Posted: 3/7/2008 3:22:50 PM
Hi beershark,
Thats funny, my gym has clear shower doors, they are of the foggy type, you cant make out too much detail. But, yeah I tend jump in and jump out...lol. I like the sauna and steam room, so I am just going to have to find a way to deal with it. I heard what doesnt kill you, will make you stronger...I hope it holds true...lol.

I always thought wood was absorbant, therefore, I was nervous about bacteria and such could live up in the wood.

Well, thanks for the info...
 zooteenyc
Joined: 4/22/2007
Msg: 5 (view)
 
Gym Etiquette?
Posted: 3/4/2008 11:42:28 AM
Wow. I know we shouldn't put our mouth on those things. You know what, I haven't even thought about that, the mouth to bottle thing. I normally don't fill my bottle up like that anyways, I have the bottle away from the fountain cause it was easier that way.
Yeah, I normally take my own bottle, but sometimes forget and fill up an opened one.
 zooteenyc
Joined: 4/22/2007
Msg: 4 (view)
 
Gym Etiquette?
Posted: 3/4/2008 8:51:55 AM
Funny.


Don't use the gym water fountain.


I don't know if I want to know why, but I am going to ask anyway "why" not use the gym water fountain? I sometimes fill up my water bottle with it.

I always use a towel in the sauna and steam room, I was just wondering how others felt about it and if it bothered others.

Thanks for the feedback.
 zooteenyc
Joined: 4/22/2007
Msg: 3 (view)
 
Gym Etiquette?
Posted: 2/21/2008 10:20:15 AM
Hi, thanks for the responses.
There are other issues regarding the use of machines, such as wiping them down after using them, so others don't have to handle their sweat on the bars, seats, etc....
But, I just jumped to what concerned me the most...lol.
I know they clean with ammonia and probably bleach, but that is usually only sporadic or at the end of the day. From my understanding, and please correct me if I am wrong, that viruses and bacteria could live under those conditions (suana and steam room) for hours and therefore can be transmitted to others in between the daily cleanings.

People have asked me what pet peeves do I have, and I could never think of any. I think I just found my pet peeves.
The sauna issues and to think about it, I hate when I see someone blow their noses onto the street. (Not using a tissue, hold one side and shoot.)
Oh, and you could add, not covering their mouth when coughing.

Thanks again.
 zooteenyc
Joined: 4/22/2007
Msg: 1 (view)
 
Gym Etiquette?
Posted: 2/20/2008 9:42:17 PM
Hi,
I am pretty new to this gym. And I have a few questions and concerns.
This may not sound pretty, but not sure where to ask this.
I am just getting used to everyone walking around in the locker room, in the buff. I mean everyone, to the point where I feel funny with my towel wrapped around me.

But, what I really wanted to know: Is it normal for gym goers to use the sauna and steam room completely in the nude (no towel). And how do they sit on the sauna bench and steam room tiles without feeling exposed to bacteria or other forms of viruses?
I have also seen one women brushing her hair in the sauna. I am thinking ,well wouldn't you want to take a shower after the sauna? Aren't you sweating in her? Hey, isn't it rude, how do I know you don't have lice or something. I was always told you should not brush your hair: at the dinner table, sitting on the bus or train next to someone. (What I am trying to say, isn't this rude or unsanitary?)

Basically, how do you avoid feeling the "cooties", while you are at the gym?
Is there any Gym Etiquette?
 zooteenyc
Joined: 4/22/2007
Msg: 4 (view)
 
My girl?
Posted: 2/13/2008 10:23:48 PM
Yeah I should have known better...lol.
He is now talkin about how he wants a relationship with me, and if I would be able to get on the pill...lol. I call him on this telling him "you got to be kidding"... and he is serious on the phone, to the point of questioning me why I am so heisatant about a relationship.

Seriously, we haven't even met up in person (texted and spoke for only one day), do people like this exist.
Do women actually go for this?
Maybe I should post this in the ask a women forum...and see what kind of responses I get from them...
 zooteenyc
Joined: 4/22/2007
Msg: 3 (view)
 
My girl?
Posted: 2/13/2008 4:32:15 PM
Ok. Call me dense, and not to experanced with the dating scene. I am also new to texting, I prefer talk or meet up.
I wasnt sure if I should be offended or if it was one of those jokes guys play on the phone and you lose it in the text.

Thanks for all of your input.
 zooteenyc
Joined: 4/22/2007
Msg: 1 (view)
 
My girl?
Posted: 2/13/2008 2:28:23 PM
Why would you start texting someone you haven't even spoke on the phone with :
1. "Hi sexy."
2."How are you babe?"
And the last but my favorite text
3."Could you send me some pics to my phone so I can have my girl close?"

I normally take the first two in stride, but the last one kind of irked me. I couldn't even respond to it.
Mind you he is 34 years old, and no he is not from this site.

Is this one of those red flags? Am I reading too much into it or what?
 zooteenyc
Joined: 4/22/2007
Msg: 5 (view)
 
What is the likelihood that...
Posted: 2/7/2008 10:16:16 AM
Hi,
If you don't meet up, the phone sparks will eventually end up disappearing. He may already be hinting to you that this is happening, by telling you that he is looking for something more than just a friend or a phone buddy. Either way, once those talks on the phone start to fizzle, then the face to face meeting will be out of the picture as well.

Hey, if you already exchanged photos, there should be an idea if the two of you are physically attracted to each other...
Why would you want to convince someone of doing something they are not comfortable with? I would respect his wishes and move on.
Right now you are already thinking negative, and putting pressure on the meeting. I wouldn't be surprised if this pressure convinces you two not to meet up...and then you two lose the phone sparks as a result.

Well, good luck to the two of you...
 zooteenyc
Joined: 4/22/2007
Msg: 2 (view)
 
30's The New 20's?
Posted: 2/7/2008 7:54:55 AM
The only thing I can think of is that you are not coming across as 34. Your dress is very 20's and some of your profile is 20's as well. Putting the "scent" out of a 20's person will attract other 20's and 40+'s and probably put off some folks in their 30's. This may not be the case but the image you are putting out there is very 20's.


I will consider this, hmm dressing my age, wow this is going to hurt...lol.

I was thinking those (men closer to my age) that are single....were looking for that 18 yr old to make them feel young again (midlife crisis). Maybe living in New York, I was wondering if the men here are just more about just having fun...the city that doesnt sleep...party every night...etc...
Then when they turn into thier late 40's or 50's, is when they are looking to slow down and then look for someone my age...maybe I am just thinking too much..my head is hurting...lol.

You know what..I think I will just think about changing my appearce...lol.
 zooteenyc
Joined: 4/22/2007
Msg: 1 (view)
 
30's The New 20's?
Posted: 2/6/2008 3:28:18 PM
I don't think so. lol.
I know stupid subject, I recall it from a song I heard.

I was just wondering where are all the men in their 30's. I have had plenty of hmm...fish contact me that are in their late forties and fifties. Then there are those occasional fishes who are in their early 20's.
I know, I keep hearing age is just a number. I don't know if its so true, I keep hearing it from the 20 and 50 year olds. (I just end up thinking they are biased on the subject..lol)

Are all the 30 year olds at a stage in their lives, where they are: still married with kids, focused on their career or maybe at that age men prefer to be bachelors? Or does it have to do with the mid-life crises, and they are looking for 18 year olds? Or last but not least, maybe I am just too butt ugly for someone in their 30's...lol.

I know this thread will be deleted...
Sorry, I just don't understand why its so difficult to find someone close to my age...
 zooteenyc
Joined: 4/22/2007
Msg: 11 (view)
 
Opps… Favourites Notification email… to DELETE from Fav, not see… SHOOT!!!!
Posted: 12/22/2007 8:08:21 PM
Hi
I don't know if this is helpful, but you can turn off the notification email. And just check your favorites periodically. I was tired of the notification mail from pof "you have matches" or "email" or "added to favorites", so I just turned the feature off. I check my profile every now and then, so it's not a problem for me.
 zooteenyc
Joined: 4/22/2007
Msg: 57 (view)
 
“Viewed me” link on POF
Posted: 12/22/2007 7:48:40 PM
Hi,
I don't think because someone clicks on your profile they are automatically interested..like many have said they may check your profile and realize that there is not much in common or changed their mind. I also found myself checking the same guy out over and over again, because he keeps changing his picture or I just didn’t remember I checked him out the week before.

I personally believe if a guy is interested he would just send a short message. If they can't get past saying "Hi", then I don't think we would hit it off anyways.

I believe the guys in the very first row are people who have checked you out in the PAST, but are online now. The photos below are people who have just checked you out, starting with the most recent, but that doesn't mean they are not online they may still be online.

Well, hoped that helped....
 zooteenyc
Joined: 4/22/2007
Msg: 13 (view)
 
I don't understand why he left me
Posted: 12/21/2007 1:49:57 PM
Hi, be it his insecurities, lack of trust or another woman, I think you should move on. It could be one of the above, or all of the above, but does it really matter. You should find someone who wants to be with you, not someone who has to "figure it out". Come to YOUR senses...and when or if he "figures it out"...tell him before he goes any further, "That is nice, so have I, and you know you were right we are better off just as friends." Maybe more communication could have helped and prevented the fall out, but what is done is done. Find someone who is going to trust you, and treat you with respect.

A drink is a drink is a drink....and if you buy a woman a drink and expect sex in return because of it, then you need to grow up or give the woman some credit. I am worth more than a beer or a shot of liquor...and your girl should think that way too...or there is more problems in the relationship than accepting a drink.

And to all those men who accept drinks from their buddies, hmm..I bet they expect more and want to get into your pants...think twice before you say sure...lol.
 zooteenyc
Joined: 4/22/2007
Msg: 5 (view)
 
? For Women and Men.
Posted: 8/31/2007 11:01:17 AM
I never said I would introduce my child to someone I was just dating, but would if we considered making something serious of it. And like I stated before, that would NOT be determined in a week or so. Waiting until you are engaged to introduce your child, seems a little extreme. I would have to see how he interacts with my child before committing to someone like that, I wouldn't get engaged to someone in a few weeks or months for that matter.

Wolfie65, I agree and believe that women who state they are not looking for a daddy seem to be missleading, because we are a package deal. You may not be looking for one, but you are going to get someone who will be part of your childs life, be it a daddy or role model. You state there is a huge difference, but you don't state why or how.

And I agree there is a difference whether you are a biological parent or not, but it doesn't mean its a negative one. There is a lot of talk and hype about the drama and resentfulness that the child and the biological father must have and bring to the relationship. This is not always the case, and from my experience, it is a falsehood. To me it means that you have an additional person (the child) who will love you unconditionally. And you would have more respect from the mom, for showing that your love is unconditional. The kid or kids would be happy to have an additional person who cares and shows an interest in their lives. The biological father who sees that their child is going to have someone who respects and accepts that child as their own, would and should be appreciative of that. And if the biological father doesn't, then they may not be a responsible adult to be part of their lives until they could accept that.

I appreciate everyones responses. Thank you.
 zooteenyc
Joined: 4/22/2007
Msg: 3 (view)
 
? For Women and Men.
Posted: 8/28/2007 2:57:15 PM
Please don't think I am trying "flame" on you, just trying to understand some of the comments of some of men and women make on here. I am curious to see if men who avoid dating single moms is based on certain "ideas" or is it "facts" or on "bad experiences".
I am also a bit confused by women who state they want a man to be part of their lives, but feel he should not be considered a dad to her child. As if, that would be a bad thing for them and a good thing towards the potential man in their life.

I am a single mother, and I don't hide that fact from anyone, but I would never introduce my little one to someone unless they were serious about being a part of our lives. (And that can not be determined in a week or two...lol) Being just as friends and then work from there. (I started all my relationships, before my child, as friends first.)
The person I choose to be with would be someone I respect and trust with my life, and hope they feel the same way about me. So therefore, I would expect them to treat her as our child.
There needs to be communication, when it comes to raising or babysitting or teaching children. Without communication, even if the child is yours biologically or not, there is going to be a lot of fights and drama.
The children are not the drama or work, but the adults who cannot communicate or work out their differences. (In my opinion, communication should to be established BEFORE the relationship gets to the level of introducing to the child as someone more than just friends and someone you have feeling for and that this person is going to be part of our lives...etc. etc. etc.)
 zooteenyc
Joined: 4/22/2007
Msg: 2 (view)
 
? For Women and Men.
Posted: 8/28/2007 11:48:42 AM
Funny how I thought the same thing, in most cases I would think, no diapers to change or bottles to make or pacifiers to clean, etc.

Okay I guess, I should have stated, a permanent big brother or role model. I am trying to say that you don't have to adopt, but be there for emotional support. There are friends of mine who treat their cousins, nieces, etc., as if they were their own children.

As far as the coming in coming in second, what situations are we talking about? I don't really understand this one.

This leads me to yet another question for the Men:
Do you think that if the child was biologically yours it would be different? And you would come before the child?


Thanks for all the input so far.
 zooteenyc
Joined: 4/22/2007
Msg: 1 (view)
 
? For Women and Men.
Posted: 8/28/2007 9:50:41 AM
Hi,
I have been reading the forums. And have a few questions or need a little reminder.

For the Women: Why would a woman state that she "is not looking for" or "does not want" a daddy for her child. Do these women expect the new man in their life to play no role in their child’s life? Even if they have the biological dad visiting, how should the child view the new man in their life?

For the Men: What is so wrong about being a dad to child that is not biologically yours? There are men who adopt or become big brothers to youngsters all the time, is there really a difference?

Thanks.
 zooteenyc
Joined: 4/22/2007
Msg: 9 (view)
 
Should Women Really Make The First Contact Online?
Posted: 8/16/2007 1:45:05 PM

I was making a friend to gossip with and get maybe some free guy advice off of.
You have to start somewhere and if that means the woman has to do it then so be it.


I just read your post, and the guy advice is interesting. I may be pushing it here...but do you have any suggestions...other than take something from his profile? Or is it that the best way to go?
(I guess I haven't been the "social butterfly" at parties...lol. And I have been on the online dating thing for a while...but no luck...as you can tell...)
 zooteenyc
Joined: 4/22/2007
Msg: 8 (view)
 
Should Women Really Make The First Contact Online?
Posted: 8/16/2007 1:32:57 PM
Well, I wouldn't say the rejection part would bother me as much if I wasn't a bit shy. But I would be thinking that he wasn't interested to start with...(since we both viewed eachothers profile).


I don't see why not........Women have blathered on long enough about wanting equality and now you have it you still expect the guys to do all the work !!

Wake up and smell the coffee...!!!


I think the "equality" excuse has been overplayed on this site, it is a real turn off.
I smell the coffee and drink it everyday, living in the city.
You should open your eyes though, we are not so equal. We do not get the same pay, positions or respect as a man would on certian playing fields...this list can go on and on but that would be considered an "angry" woman thread.
If saying "Hi, how are you?" is considered work, I don't think I would want to deal with that person anyways....lol.

Thanks to all.
 zooteenyc
Joined: 4/22/2007
Msg: 4 (view)
 
Should Women Really Make The First Contact Online?
Posted: 8/16/2007 11:34:14 AM
Thanks for the responses...before this gets deleted..lol
I am not talking about first move on a date.

But what if you both looked at eachothers photo....and still no response...wouldn't that already tell you that he is not attacted or interested in you?
 zooteenyc
Joined: 4/22/2007
Msg: 1 (view)
 
Should Women Really Make The First Contact Online?
Posted: 8/16/2007 10:49:50 AM
Sorry, I know there has been a few posts on first move.
But, I guess I would like to know if women have done it? And what was the outcome? What I am also trying to ask is if both of you viewed eachothers profile and the guy didn't make intial contact, wouldn't you conclude that he is just not interested?
And if you decide to proceed anyways, wouldn't you feel that he really wasn't that into you, and end up feeling like just an option?
 zooteenyc
Joined: 4/22/2007
Msg: 18 (view)
 
Is he not into me or what?
Posted: 7/26/2007 11:23:16 AM
Funny how I just finished reading the "he's just not into you book" today. You sound just like one of the letters in it.


Then after about a month of occasional comments on my part, he sent me a message and we began a conversation.


After a month of you sending him comments "he decides" to begin a conversation. Are you serious....after comment one...no conversation..he was never really interested in you..sry.
Someone who only emails you for a last minute date, hold up...he only "hints" to you that he wants to meet up. This is another hint he isn't that into you.
If he truely "missed you" he would have called you. I love hearing the words, but I believe the action behind them speak even louder.

I understand he is grieving, and he probably will be for the rest of his life, and I wouldn't hold that against him. On the other hand, he is on a dating site looking for some form of comfort on here, and he decided to answer your message. Maybe all he wants is some form of comfort from you, but you need to be prepared for that is all he wants from you. Are you willing to be just that..."comfort".


I really like him and think he is "a keeper".


Sorry, I don't think so. I can see where you are in a relationship and your expectations are not being met, but why would you want to start one where you already know that they are not going to be. If you want to remain just friends go for it, I don't suggest it, because you seem to already have more than "just friends" feelings for him.

Sry...book is still fresh in my head ...lol.
Good Luck
 zooteenyc
Joined: 4/22/2007
Msg: 4 (view)
 
Does anyone else find emails go stale?
Posted: 7/24/2007 1:26:54 PM
I use email only because instant messenger doesn't work at work. I hate it when the window pops up....but it won't open because of firewalls....I don't know if the person thinks I am ignoring them or not, because they don't send a follow up email. Oh...well.

I do lose interest when someone who is local and emails me hi...then an hour later....how is your day....then an hour later...what you been up to...and this goes on for days.
If they have my number they should be able to call me....or they could ask me out for a coffee... but it seems like they are waiting for me to ask them out...
I end up feeling that they are only killing time with me, and it shows .. how they put it now a days.."that they are not really that into you"..
 zooteenyc
Joined: 4/22/2007
Msg: 44 (view)
 
When does honesty become shallowness?
Posted: 7/24/2007 12:31:33 PM
I believe everyone has some requirements, if not, we wouldn't even be on this site. We would be going out with the guy/girl who asks you everyday for change for beer...etc…lol.

At first I was going to agree with this poster but then realized I didn’t…or do I…either way it made me think…lol. :

There is a difference between preferences and absolutes. It's the rigidity behind absolutes that leaves many singles stuck exactly where they are....single.

Certainly if one finds someone physically repulsive or the physical appearance turns one off, that would preclude a romantic relationship. When it's more of a he must look like he stepped out of the pages of GQ or only a blonde will do before I will even consider giving you the time of day and getting to know you as a person, that's definitely shallow.


But, I think it is the rigidity behind preferences that will make an individual “shallow” or single for a very long time. Like stated before, some of this could be considered more superficial than shallow. But, if your not rigid behind your absolutes you may end up more unhappy if you settle for something or someone you could not live with, and end up regretting it and hurting someone else down the road in the process.

When looking for a partner in life, you should look for someone who could make you happy emotionally, not just physically. A person’s hair, nails and with contacts even their eye color could change, their body can also change for better or worse.
On the other hand, their personality or lack of one, will rarely ever change.

Just my 2 cents…I don’t know if it makes any cents tho…lol.
 zooteenyc
Joined: 4/22/2007
Msg: 3 (view)
 
Any Suggestions?
Posted: 7/13/2007 6:48:33 AM
Hi, and thank you all for your insight.
Maybe it is the city then..lol. There goes those damn lol's..I used them alot because I know you can't see emotion and feelings on here.
I have noticed that I am attracted and have had great conversations with people who are just too far away. And eventually the connection will fade, usually because of the distance I will pull away.
As far as the weight, I am working on it, I just would hate to meet someone and then the weight is an issue. Maybe because I used to have only photos of face shots, and been asked are you a skinny chick....well I have been called "thick"...lol.
If "thick" is average I may consider changing it....
The player thing...wow I totally agree with you...if they are one they are not going to come forth with that information anyways. I don't know how that one slipped in there...

Thank you again for all of your inputs...
 zooteenyc
Joined: 4/22/2007
Msg: 1 (view)
 
Any Suggestions?
Posted: 7/12/2007 7:19:44 PM
Hi, I could use some advice or suggestions on my profile. I have met some nice people on here for chat....but not quite what I am looking for in dating...for possible long term. As you can see, I am not even sure where to post my profile. lol. I am thinking my profile should be adjusted or maybe I need to take another approach. For example, am I coming off a certain way that may be too strong... or maybe too negative. Or is it okay?

Please help..I would like some suggestions.
 zooteenyc
Joined: 4/22/2007
Msg: 216 (view)
 
men in uniforms
Posted: 7/11/2007 5:30:42 PM
I think most men look hot in uniforms...but the fact is they know it too...lol.

I have found most of them to be deceiving or just plain cheaters. But, hey I still catch myself watching the fire trucks go by...lol.
 zooteenyc
Joined: 4/22/2007
Msg: 1 (view)
 
STD Paperwork?
Posted: 7/6/2007 3:07:57 PM
I constantly get tested...trying to be safe and out of habit...since the the doctors usually jab a needle into me anyway for some reason or other, why not.

Well, I was asked, and did't mind answering, but then I was asked if I recieved the paperwork...I told him I recieved my results over the phone.. after a moment of thinking about it... I was like damn...you want to see paperwork...it kind of felt like asking to see a dogs pedigree or something.

I dont know...is this going a little too far...should you even consider sleeping with someone if you feel that you have to SEE the proof upfront or afterwards..?
Do people actually go "hey maybe next week will be the night that we should get together sexually...so we should go to the doctor this week and exchange paperwork.."?

When and how or should you ask someone for thier hmmm...papers...
 zooteenyc
Joined: 4/22/2007
Msg: 88 (view)
 
Her sexual past.....ur business?
Posted: 7/6/2007 2:43:50 PM

Ohhhh Phaaaaleez ...If STD's are what some are worried about.....You can get that from having slept with ONE person unprotected.....or 90 ....


Everyone is stating yes because they basically dont want to catch anything..but just like this poster states it really doesnt come down to how many. You can be a virgin..have UNPROTECTED sex that first time and catch an STD. The person you had sex with could have only had 1 or 2 partners, but those 1 or 2 partners had it. To me the number game does not come into play...it is how safe you are that does.

The OP mentions if they have a right to a brief description of every guy shes/he slept with...hmm
Does this mean height, weight, positions, locations, sizes, etc..does this have any bearing on your present relationship..i would hope not...lol.

I do believe everyone should get tested, and use protection, at least until the two are openly exclusive to one another....(even then it only takes one to cheat and then you are back to square one....)
 zooteenyc
Joined: 4/22/2007
Msg: 31 (view)
 
Have you ever been your own worst enemy?
Posted: 7/4/2007 8:03:00 PM
I think we do this because we want to protect ourselves from getting hurt ...and in a sense you did...for you...he was just too easily offended...

I always catch myself saying the wrong thing...either being sarcastic or brutally honest and yes sometimes just being ignorant about something I know nothing about...sometimes I was sorry..most of the time I wasn't...lol

I put my foot in my mouth all the time. (I am getting used to the taste...lol)
I would hope my match would be there no matter what, being my better or equal half, and work on avoiding the situation from happening again.

If he can't accept an apology he is going to be a very lonely person, because no one is perfect and they are gong to make mistakes.

Whatever it was, especially if it was just a bad joke, that scared him away...he could have at least had the spine to tell you.

Life goes on, and you should be glad it didnt work out sooner than later.
 zooteenyc
Joined: 4/22/2007
Msg: 37 (view)
 
Compliments vs. Complements
Posted: 6/29/2007 11:12:19 AM

In the heat of the moment, there are surely going to be some slight errors, but to make these deliberately (humor aside) or w/reckless abandon, just what does it say for that individual?


Hmm..i think you answered yourself...they are either humorous or reckless...lol
To me this doesn't say much, because there are too many reasons why there are errors in a profile...as stated through out by posters... But, this whole line of questioning makes me wonder why does it have to play such a role. Lets say an individual did not have the opportunities that some of did. They didn't go to college or even speak our native language, and they are in the process of learning. Should you totally avoid them because they don't reach our writing standards...ahh i know this went off subject a bit... because original post is on one particular person who claimed to be something that you believe is not honest about her hmm...being a professional.


I'm not here to judge others, but I do have a right to do so for what may be or not shared for communications w/ me. Yep, sometimes it takes just a few words to make a good point ...or to lose it before others.


This looks like you are back talking yourself...I not here to do it, but I can if I want too.
To be honest I think everyone judges everyone on here...maybe some more than others...or on certain topics period. To me in this situation it may just be a defense mechanism, either to protect yourself from getting hurt or being disappointed...I personally think we all do it...me included...but i try to correct it when i notice it or someone points it out to me...sry to disappoint many but what can i say i am only human...

 zooteenyc
Joined: 4/22/2007
Msg: 34 (view)
 
'discrete' vs. 'discreet'
Posted: 6/29/2007 8:43:24 AM
Love your post Arugula...but you might have just lost half the pof from writing to you..

Deerdog..you could use anything in my profile...if you choose to...it has no copyrights...lol.
Hey if you don't mind, I am considering using the line I quoted from you, and might put it in my profile...?
 zooteenyc
Joined: 4/22/2007
Msg: 24 (view)
 
'discrete' vs. 'discreet'
Posted: 6/28/2007 2:00:30 PM
So, this woman claimed to be a professional and misspelled a word....now she is a liar...lol. Opps, I used (...) they obviously don't belong there....oh well. Hey, I like em... so there goes some more now....are you feeling sick or naucious...opps did i spell that wrong...i hope i didn't send you to the hospital on that misspelling and low cap i's.

Sry, but I see too much of spelling this or punctuation that. I can understand if I am in school, and getting graded, but this is a dating site. Maybe if you're an english teacher, and looking to have offspring that will become english teachers, and you are looking for a fellow english teacher does it really matter? (Ha... i know little e)Does making mistakes in spelling and grammar and punctuation make you stupid or human? I know I am not perfect, and would hate to be with someone who claims to be. I wouldn't mind learning from my mistakes, but if you are going to judge me on spelling, damn imagine if you knew what I did last summer...(don't ask it was a joke or was it)...lol.

I think sometimes errors could be made for a number of reasons:
1. They type all day, and just want to get their point across quickly.
2. They did spell check and when correcting, choose the wrong word from the selection.
3.Then there are those who really don't care, as long as they get their point across.

Then there is me, all of the above. I am on the computer all day, and I am here to have a good time, meeting people without getting judged, picked on, disected or dragged through the mud for a misstake. I have my boss, the big brother watching, and many others to do that for me.

But then again, and in the long run of things, I don't want a "partner in life" for his spelling and grammer skills....
 zooteenyc
Joined: 4/22/2007
Msg: 37 (view)
 
Why are women ready to admit their past sexual conquests,history and sexcapades so easily
Posted: 6/27/2007 11:15:27 AM

Actually I have to thank these ladies that just come out and broadcast their sexual exploits , sexual graphic details, sexual desires, bragging about illicit/extramarital affairs and sexual fantasies on line for the whole world to see . These are the ladies that I WEED OUT . I am not looking for a roll in the hay I am looking for something meaningful. If that makes me a prude than I guess that I am .


I am new to the dating lifestyle, please enlighten me or at least entertain me...lol.
I can understand about bragging about being illicit/extramarital affairs, but why would everything else you mentioned weed them out of a date. Being that you would date a person before a long term relationship, nowadays I don’t know, people on here tend to think they could jump into a relationship first. Why do you assume, that these women would only being looking for "a roll in the hay", once in a relationship with them I can understand why you may feel uncomfortable with them sharing your lifestyle as a couple to the world.

To answer your question, I would think, they discuss and admit thier sexual history, to weed out the men who are not compatible with their likes or dislikes. And some may do it for the attention, either way they get it.

By the way I totally agree with you Deerdog1 on post #38, words to live by..


Don't agree with me unless you truly do, argue with me and stand up to me when you disagree with me .for I am and want to be your equal ,and do this knowing that make up sex is worth fighting for .
 zooteenyc
Joined: 4/22/2007
Msg: 1 (view)
 
Keep getting logged off....when trying to reply. [Closed Thread]
Posted: 6/25/2007 9:36:40 PM
Keep getting logged off....when trying to reply. It asks me to save my message and log back in to send it. When I do this it keeps asking me again and again. And it is not sending my message...why is this happening? Thank you.
 zooteenyc
Joined: 4/22/2007
Msg: 17 (view)
 
How do you know you are exclusive?
Posted: 6/20/2007 8:52:32 AM
I have also been told that it is not a good idea to ask if you are exclusive.
Because, once you ask if you are exclusive, and the answer is "no" you could risk the guy getting turned away? (Not a bad idea if that is not what you are looking for or you are getting attached to him, but what if you are just having fun together.)

They would be turned away because MOST men find it hard to share...lol.
(Damn, I find it hard to share...lol.)

This is a question for the guys who are NOT exclusive, and are free to "date and sleep" with whomever you choose.: Why should the women you are fooling around with be there only for you, and if not move on? Why wouldn't you expect them to be doing what you are doing?
 zooteenyc
Joined: 4/22/2007
Msg: 15 (view)
 
How do you know you are exclusive?
Posted: 6/19/2007 7:23:50 PM
I get confused too...I was probably one of those threads....lol.

As I have stated before I always thought "dating" was getting to know someone, without strings attached? Until, the conversation comes up, about being exclusive you are free to see.. umm.. date.. even sleep with...whoever you want to?

The best advice I received was to have the talk.
 zooteenyc
Joined: 4/22/2007
Msg: 9 (view)
 
Human Contact
Posted: 6/13/2007 10:46:44 AM

It's just sad that sex has become like McDonalds. Drive up.....select from menu...taste....leave. Called junk food.....some benifit but not healthy. Human contact can be so many things......laughter...sharring...communicating......and yes hugs are delicious. It's so sad that intimacy has lost it's meaning and has been brought down to a lower level called ....casual sex.


I totally agree. I feel human contact is a need. There are times, out of the blue, when I have asked a friend of mine or a lover for a hug. (Just a hug.) For something so simple, I would sometimes get a funny smile or a smirk, but never a "No".


I feel sad for those who think human contact and intimacy is only through "sex".
One day, you never know, due to an injury or sickness, "sex" will no longer be an option.
 zooteenyc
Joined: 4/22/2007
Msg: 132 (view)
 
why are some woman afraid of admitting that they like sex?
Posted: 6/12/2007 9:11:56 AM
I don't think it's so much that women are afraid of admitting that they like sex, but rather than timing or we are a little more picky than men. I know I am going going to get bashed for that...lol. Mens' minds are more focused on getting sex, while women tend to be a little more emotionally involved. I know not all women, but I would think the majority. Personally, I don't have to be in love with the person to have sex, but I do need to feel comfortable with the man to enjoy it. I get emails and instant messages, "Do you like sex?" no "Hi, Hello or How are you." Right then and there, I know its not going to work out. So I dont even respond, and then I am considered a prude or must not like it. Why would I get into that conversation with someone I haven't spoken with before, unless I was looking for cyber sex. I have even had first dates, ask that same question.
How do you answer:
"I don't like sex, I love it, but it just ain't gonna happen with you?" (That is if you are not interested.)

"Sure, I love it, matter fact lets go find out if we are any good at it...lol." (That being your interested.)
 zooteenyc
Joined: 4/22/2007
Msg: 5 (view)
 
Are You Still Considered Dating After Sex?
Posted: 6/6/2007 9:28:55 PM
Thanks for all the input.
Well, like I mentioned earlier we just started to get to know eachother. Maybe it was more like an instant attraction and we are going along with it, but who is to say he is being exclusive...we haven't discussed it. (I am not seeing anyone else at the moment, we do have other fun together, so I don't consider myself being slutty. I think a woman has needs too...lol)

Maybe the better question is "Does dating really mean being exclusive with one person?"

But, what if we are not exclusive, then if I meet someone I could say hey I am not dating anyone...because we are not exclusive...? This jsut seems a little dishonest, when you think about it....but hey...

Wow..I just confused myself..lol.

Do people start to talk to only one person at a time on here, meet that one person, and then move on to others only after that one does not work out?
I really thought dating sites were to meet different people and see who you click with and who you dont.

I think I am better off just having the "discussion" and take it from there. Ahhhh...
 zooteenyc
Joined: 4/22/2007
Msg: 2 (view)
 
Are You Still Considered Dating After Sex?
Posted: 6/6/2007 1:29:11 PM
Thanks, I guess I could ask that.
But, would mean dating is exclusive?
 zooteenyc
Joined: 4/22/2007
Msg: 1 (view)
 
Are You Still Considered Dating After Sex?
Posted: 6/5/2007 2:29:44 PM
I am new to this dating thing. I met someone and we are getting to know eachother, but taking it slow. Well maybe not too slow, we have been together intimately. We talk and meet up time to time, but there has been no conversation of relationship or being exclusive. Which I am not pushing for, like I said I am new to this, and not ready to jump into the fire just yet. Want to be sure we are both ready.

Isn't "dating" getting to know someone, without strings attached? Until, the conversation comes up, about being exclusive aren't you free to see.. umm.. date.. even sleep with...whoever you want to?

I have also been asked well have you slept with the guy you are dating?
Does this matter?
 zooteenyc
Joined: 4/22/2007
Msg: 56 (view)
 
Chivary vs. Equal Rights/Responsibility in today's PoF dating world.
Posted: 5/22/2007 2:22:02 PM
[ If the "traditional" roles apply, then for the most part, we all know how that works. The male is the one to take charge, ask politely for the date, pick her up with flowers, open doors, pull her chair out, let her sit first, pay for dinner, so on and so forth....]

Hi, I don't know, when I first heard about equal rights I thought about the right to vote, work, etc. Why is it that in order to get these basic rights, we should no longer expect flowers, open doors and the chair out, etc. I really dont see how these two go hand in hand. You would think that the fact that some of us can now work, vote , cook and clean the house, would make us more of a woman.

Besides, I believe even though we have rights that we did not have before, there are many limits (I think they call it glass roofs or ceilings) in play, we still do not get paid the same as a man for the same jobs, we do not get the same deals a man gets on clothes or cars, etc. This society does not treat us as equal as many of us would like to think.
 zooteenyc
Joined: 4/22/2007
Msg: 15 (view)
 
Turned off once you see photo, now what?
Posted: 5/22/2007 5:55:21 AM
I was not trying to be mean, I was describing the photo. The hair and clothes were just additional turn offs. I never said I was a dime piece, I just don't find him attractive. If it was up to me I wouldn't have any photos up myself, but I know on dating sites if you dont have a pic you are not going to get much, if any responses. That has just been my experience. I see you decided to have a pic, have you tried it with and without a pic? (Plz, email me and tell me which photo or photos is unflatering, I would consider taking it off.)

Now I don't understand, he started his conversation on how "I liked your photo and how it caught his eye", does that make him only interested in looks, but because he doesnt have a photo its okay to be selective.

Thanks everyone for all the advice and information.
 zooteenyc
Joined: 4/22/2007
Msg: 88 (view)
 
Help!!!! My Best Friend's Son Just Asked Me Out
Posted: 5/21/2007 6:14:29 AM
Hi, I can see how some people could misread your subject, but it still seems no one got it. I believe she is now wanting to know how to tell her good friend no thanks without hurting her friends feelings.

It must be very ackward to say the least. Maybe just tell her you are talking to someone or emailing someone you are really interested in meeting and would not want to disrespect them, and wish him luck.

I am no expert on this subject, but may you should start a new thread with a clearer title to help you out.
This thread is just continuing on another topic, interesting one, but not helping you out. Good luck and keep us posted.
 
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