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 Author Thread: And The Most Hideous Song Of This Decade Goes To Black Eye Peas for My Humps
 cobaltblu
Joined: 3/6/2005
Msg: 15 (view)
 
And The Most Hideous Song Of This Decade Goes To Black Eye Peas for My Humps
Posted: 8/4/2009 7:48:09 PM
I haven't read much more of this thread-so forgive me is someone else already set the record straight...but

"how much?

10 dallwa... me sucky sucky... me give ooo everyting ooo wan...

everything?

everyting...

me sucky sucky, me love you long time"

Is from "Full Metal Jacket" one of the Best Movies of All Time (according to ME!) :)
And "My Humps" is the worst song of all time. I can laugh at "London Bridge"...I can laugh at Milli Vanilli...I can laugh (while cringing/feeling ill) at Avirl Lavigne...Celine Dion..many others....but I cannot even bring myself to laugh/be amused at the level of stupidity that went into "My Humps"...it seriously angers me.
Ppl think metal makes ppl violent!? No no no...Metallica makes me happy! It is good music!! "My Humps" makes me wish I was deaf.
 cobaltblu
Joined: 3/6/2005
Msg: 64 (view)
 
Why don't men and women -- by and large -- like male-pattern baldness?
Posted: 8/2/2009 5:21:40 PM
I have no problem with bald men. I often find bald guys attractive. Like some of the other replies I read-I do not like comb overs, obvious plugs, toupees...those are just sad. It's probably better for those guys to accept that they are balding-rather then to try and fight it and look silly (and waste $). I think that years ago-it was considered that only old men or bad asses (hard core bike/gang members, prison inmates, white sepremacists/AKA "skin heads') were bald. But now I think that most of us now realize that some guys go bald earlier in life, and they can still be normal/main stream/good guys.
 cobaltblu
Joined: 3/6/2005
Msg: 148 (view)
 
Men, Does It Disturb You If...
Posted: 8/2/2009 3:28:23 PM
I haven't yet encountered a youth minister who wears a kilt to work doesn't work in Scotland...but it does sound super creepy to me! Ha.

Fun but yet serious turn offs:

-Mullets
-Slow drivers
-El caminos
-Lowered vehicles....the other day i saw a full size pick up lowered! Up until that day i had only ever seen cars/light duty trucks..which is still wrong...but a full size truck!? lowered?! why why why??? :(
-Spoilers...on shit a$$ cars (unless you are at the track...drag racing...you do not need a spoiler to drive around a city!)
-Spitting (do guys think is manly? do some guys have a medical problem? see a Dr. if so)
-Bad dental hygiene: rotten/black/stinky teeth. Toothpaste isn't that expensive-pls use it.
-POF pet peeve: Profiles that say "looking for one great women"
Women is plural=more than one woman. Woman is singular=one woman.
(similar annoyances are the misuse of tw0, too, to; their, there, they're)

All in good fun...but i will search for a thread where we can list what we enjoy about the opposite sex...
 cobaltblu
Joined: 3/6/2005
Msg: 5 (view)
 
Being approached by a woman (complete stranger)
Posted: 8/2/2009 3:07:46 PM
Thanks for the responses! Although I am regretting not speaking to this guy today...I am going to remember this experience (or lack there of!) and the positive feed back here, so that next time I feel compelled to approach a guy...I will.

 cobaltblu
Joined: 3/6/2005
Msg: 1 (view)
 
Being approached by a woman (complete stranger)
Posted: 8/2/2009 2:12:12 PM
I did a search and only saw a small thread from 2006 about women approaching men-but if I somehow didn't search properly-please don't freak if this thread has been done a million times already. I haven't been in the forums for a long time.

My question to guys is their opinion on how they would respond to a woman who is a complete stranger coming up to talk to you. Common sense would be that you would be happy-if you were single-and found her attractive. And perhaps get her #-or have a drink together. But what if you aren't single, or are not wanting to be disturbed, or might not be interested? Could you still just be polite and say hi but...."sorry I have a gf" or "sorry i'm married"..."sorry i'm busy".

I have approached guys in the past-but it's been quite a while since i had the guts to do so-and today i wish i had. Today I decided to stop at a local coffee pub for a yogurt smoothie. I was walking across the parking lot and saw an awesome blue motorcycle. I wondered if the owner of said motorcycle was as attractive as his bike. (i presume the owner of the bike is male...call me sexest if you wish) :)

Inside I scoped the room and saw no one that would seem to fit the bike....a group of young girls and a couple of seniors. (again sterotyping! but i really don't think the bike is theirs.) I ordered and while waiting for my smoothie wondered if I should look around the corner of the coffee pub. I had to at least look. I thought i'd see a really hot guy with a super hot gf. I saw a guy-in the corner-I think on a computer. He looked attractive but i chickened out and turned around and went back to waiting for my smoothie. I got the smoothie and left.

I guess my question to guys-is would be freaked out/annoyed/turned off by a woman that doesn't know you that walks up to you in a coffee shop to talk to you. I was gonna ask if that was his awesome bike...my favorite color...same color as the outfit I am wearing today....then look for a ring on his finger...yes="have a great day" and leave; no=......"maybe you can take me for a ride sometime?" (does that sound super slutty?-cuz that is NOT what i was going for) or "may i join you (at his table)?".

What advise (and of course probably insults as well-it is the internet) does everyone(guys especially) in cyberland have? I am kinda kicking myself for not at least saying hello. But i was avoiding a potentionally ackward situation/rejection/coming across as weird/desperate. The sad thing is that in the past-I have approached guys in somewhat similair situations and it usually worked out fine...and even if it wasn't a great experience-it didn't faze me. But this time I was more worried about looking like a fool.
 cobaltblu
Joined: 3/6/2005
Msg: 19 (view)
 
Severe depression over a broken heart
Posted: 8/26/2008 7:19:01 PM
I am very sorry to hear what has happened. I think you are very smart to talk about it. It's still very recent for you. It's good to talk about it now-and hopefully after time-you will not be thinking of her 24/7. It is best to force yourself to eat and look after yourself. Try to remind yourself everyday of what you have going for yourself. You seem like a good guy, caring, intelligent and attractive. You may not have a private jet-but if that's what she was looking for-then I doubt that true happiness is her motivation for seeing this other guy. If you truly feel like you are in a deep depression-then speaking with a health professional/family doctor/counsellor is very important. I wish you all the best.
 cobaltblu
Joined: 3/6/2005
Msg: 40 (view)
 
Best and Worst lines from songs
Posted: 3/8/2008 8:13:19 PM
To the OP: Ha-I was not aware of that Eminen song lyric-but I agree with you that its awful!

Some of my favs:
Audioslave: "Be Yourself"....."be yourself is all that you can do.....i'm sure that everything will end up alright"
"Doesn't Remind Me" ...." i like gospel music and canned applause-cuz its doesn't remind me of anything"

Tea Party:..."rest assured babe-you're adored"

Aerosmith :"What It Takes"..."tell me that you're body doesn't miss my touch. tell me that my lovin didn't mean that much"

The Tragically Hip "put my feet up on the banks-looked up to the Lord above and said-hey man-thanks"

Maroon 5 "This Love" ..."I tried my best to feed her appetite. Keep her coming every night" and "She Will Be Loved"...."I drove for miles and miles. and wound up at your door. i had you so many times but somehow i want more"

Counting Crows album "August and Everything After". I love the whole CD/songs/lrics. Most ppl just remember "Mr. Jones" but the whole recording is great. Some of the lyrics I love on it are the song "Round Here"..."And in between the moon and you-the angels get a better view of the crumbling difference between wrong and right." And "Perfect Blue Buildings"..."Asleep in perfect blue buidings. beside the green apple sea. Gonna get me a little oblivion.Try to keep myself away from me." And "Anna Begins"...."It does not bother me to say this isn't love. Because if you don't want to talk about it-it isn't love. And I guess I'm going to have to live with that. But I'm sure theres something in a shade of grey. Something in between.'


Some songs are so silly/bad though-that they are somehow good!? Like:
Led Zeppelin: "squeeze my lemon til the juice runs down your leg"and "I don't care what the neighbors say-I'm gonna love you each and everyday"
SirMixAlot: "I like big butts and I cannot lie"
Maestro Fresh Wes: "sacroiliac-its like a rap sack backback" Its make absolutely no sense-but it sounds cool. And I'm a science nerd/work in the medical field-so medical terms are cool to me. lmao.


Among the songs/lyrics that I really dislike are:
"Fergie" with the My Lumps/Humps song...what total crap!
"Celine Dion"-more crap
That Umbrella, ele ele ela song! Please make it stop!
Avril Lavinge-its all just bad!
Milli Vanilli was just wrong on so many levels....r.i.p. Milli...or Vanilli...i dunno which
 cobaltblu
Joined: 3/6/2005
Msg: 39 (view)
 
single for too long??
Posted: 3/8/2008 5:23:48 PM
I guess I have been single for 34yrs!..because I have never been married. But I have had relationships. The last few years have been very difficult though because of the "being single for too long" scenerio. Its an odd feeling to really want to find someone and not be single...but not "settle". I try not to be too picky-but I can't ignore what my gut and heart want. I try not to get too discouraged when my attraction to someone is not reciprocated. I have become frustrated with even finding someone with potentional mututal attraction-enough to chat or arrange a first meeting. Dating and a relationship seem like a very distant possibilty because so much time has passed by since I have experienced those things. I just try to keep hopeful and enjoy each day.
 cobaltblu
Joined: 3/6/2005
Msg: 76 (view)
 
single men in their 30s living alone with a dog
Posted: 3/4/2008 4:36:12 AM
Are Sabinee and Fixitfred having a "lets see how many quotes I can do!" competition? If you both are-congratulations-you both added enough quotes to make me dizzy!
 cobaltblu
Joined: 3/6/2005
Msg: 72 (view)
 
Letting go when you still want to f***
Posted: 3/2/2008 5:37:15 AM
Lust...hmm yeah I vaguely remember that..it was great. But then I reached the point/maturity to want more from life/relationships. I can satisfy my lust on my own. Certainly not the same as sex with another person-but if it is truly just sex with the other person-and no other substance-then its not what I want.

I want the lust again someday-but not JUST lust-I want love and attraction and caring and committment and intelligence. There came a time in life when instead of being attracted to "hot guys", I became attracted to real men-honesty, brains, manners, ability to communicate....it all became much more complicated!

Maybe you are at the age that you want more now? I say "Great"! Don't settle for any less than you deserve. You can have lust again-but with love as well. Don't waste time with the guy that can now only provide lust-if you want more.
 cobaltblu
Joined: 3/6/2005
Msg: 35 (view)
 
single men in their 30s living alone with a dog
Posted: 3/1/2008 6:29:35 PM
I can't say for sure wtf that woman was talking about...but in my opinion there is nothing wrong with a guy living on his own/with a dog. In fact its a great thing! I would presume that he is responsible enough to look after himself and a pet. If a guy lived with his parents, a bunch of buddies, or another woman....then I'd be concerned. If he didn't like pets I'd be concerned. If he WAS a dog instead of HAD a dog-I'd be concerned. Maybe this woman has a fear of dogs?!
 cobaltblu
Joined: 3/6/2005
Msg: 73 (view)
 
Safety on a First Meet.
Posted: 3/1/2008 3:30:40 PM
You did the right thing. Its nothing personal against the guy-its the reality of todays world. We have to be cautious/safe. A true gentleman would not be insulted or insecure about respecting a womans safety and waiting to get to know each other before expecting there to be the level of trust required to get into a car with a stranger.

I haven't read the whole thread-but I would bet that someone has probably already mentioned to you that it would be best to make more definitive plans in the future. Meeting at an exact restaurant/coffee shop..meeting inside, in public view is best. Not in a parking lot or meeting place-and then proceeding elsewhere-even in separate vehicles- because it just isn't the safest.
 cobaltblu
Joined: 3/6/2005
Msg: 26 (view)
 
Pegs on Clits
Posted: 2/24/2008 3:49:26 PM
LMAO! I was truely laughing out loud at msg 25-but then I read msg 26 and laughed until a had tears streaming down my face! Absolutely hilarious!!

If anyone sees me walking oddly in the grocery store...they can thank Johnnycomelately. "Is that a grocery list clothes pinned to your clit...or are you happy to see me?"
 cobaltblu
Joined: 3/6/2005
Msg: 16 (view)
 
My dog is dying
Posted: 2/19/2008 7:21:22 PM
I am very sorry to hear that you are going through this very difficult time. I have had to make that decision before myself-and its never easy. If she is not well-then you must remind yourself that you really are doing the kindest thing for her. It is always hard to say goodbye-but often that is what has to be done. It will always be better to look back upon the good times, to remember her healthy-and know that you let her pass on to a better place before she suffered. Pets are the greatest joy-they are so loyal and loving. But it is so very heartbreaking when they die. I send you my condolences and well wishes.

For anyone that has lost a pet-or may be dealing with a sick pet-it can be good to call your vet and ask for advice. Also the Ontario Veterinary College has a support hotline: http://www.ovc.uoguelph.ca/petloss/
 cobaltblu
Joined: 3/6/2005
Msg: 34 (view)
 
Common Courtesy
Posted: 2/14/2008 6:58:15 PM
It is very sad that it happens. I think that many guys are not the greatest at communication in general-and even more guys typically avoid having to explain why they are moving on/not interested/found someone else. Guys avoid drama, conflict and don't want to hurt a womans feelings-so they just dissapear without any explaination.

I have been in very similiar situations and felt awful/wondered what happened. I have been really interested in a guy-and he disappears. But it really is best to realize that it just wasn't meant to be.

I also have to admit that I have been the one to feel like there is little to no "spark" with someone-and dreaded ending it. Its hard to explain and talk about but it is best to let the person know that you don't see things getting serious.

If its meant to be-it will work out! If he disappears-he didn't deserve you anyway. Best wishes!
 cobaltblu
Joined: 3/6/2005
Msg: 386 (view)
 
Must not do drugs....?
Posted: 2/10/2008 3:18:52 PM
Yeah-whatever-the ppl I saw when I was a kid also did use cigarettes and alcohol. Thanks for your info on "research"-but I don't care. I was just stating my personal experience/exposure to ppl that did drugs. I had no choice in the matter. I was just a little kid and saw a lot of stupid ppl do a lot of stupid things. I don't even want to debate the issue at all-I just was answering the OP's question.
 cobaltblu
Joined: 3/6/2005
Msg: 370 (view)
 
Must not do drugs....?
Posted: 2/10/2008 11:25:56 AM
OP-you ask:
"Must not do drugs....?
And if you use this contact restriction, why do you use it?"

As shocking as it may sound....my response is that I use it to avoid being contacted by, hearing from, chatting with, being friends with , dating, having a relationship with......PPL THAT DO DRUGS! The reason anyone uses any restriction is due to personal preference.

And the "why" behind that decision for me is because I have seen what drugs can do to ppl, they are illegal to begin with, they fry their brain, the person can become selfish, irresponsible, consumed by their drug, financially ruined, ignore their health, hygiene, loved ones, can't hold a job, they can lie, cheat and steal to cover up and maintain their habit, they can go to jail, they can become violent...

I won't even comment on/get into the cannibis debate. Despite my above comments about drugs-i am a little tiny bit open minded about cannibis. Would prefer to not associate with ppl that did it i guess-but some friends do/have in the past. I guess some b/fs too. They know its not my scene/my thing. Its never been a big deal in my adult relationships-but I guess because it hasn't been around me much. If it were to be some daily occurence with someone I was close with-it would be an issue.

In my past/as far back as being a young child-I have seen ppl do drugs. They started with cannibis in my opinion. I have seen its effects-it lead to other drugs-with certain ppl (not for everyone).

I guess I did comment on cannibis after all!
 cobaltblu
Joined: 3/6/2005
Msg: 26 (view)
 
No Sex Tonight
Posted: 2/9/2008 5:21:07 AM
I am very sorry about your situation. I think it is unfortunately a very common problem. I know from my past experience-that if my emotional needs aren't being satisfied-then my sex drive decreases. I am certainly not saying it is your fault-or you neglected your wife-but I just think in general-for millions of men and women-that our lifes get busy-and we don't always take the time to really connect with our partner.

I really think that most typically (there are certainly exceptions) men and woman are hard wired differently. Men usually desire sex first-then they are more interested in the emotional stuff. Women prefer the emotional stuff first-then sex. Its a major catch 22. If the woman just "put out"-likely the man would be happy and more interested in cuddling, conversation, generally happy with the relationship. But the opposite is true too-if the man just didn't expect sex-and really invested time in going on "dates" with his partner, court her, cuddle, talk-then she would probably feel so loved and respected and satisfied emotionally-that she would really feel more likely to want sex.

I think a problem also arises though-when he guy does the little gestures. dates, back rubs etc-and then really does hope for or expect sex. I think if the woman is still just trying to get back out of the rut of witholdong sex...( and i think it is often unintentional....life gets busy...she has lots on her mind...she thinks the guy expects it..it does seem like a chore...he doesn't always just want to talk or cuddle...he expects sex...so she loses interest...vs. "i'm gonna withold sex to drive him crazy") I think the woman then thinks "oh-every time we go out for dinner, or I get a back rub-then i have to put out". I think that if the relationship has really hit a slump-then each person has to communicate their feelings, their wants/needs/desires-and compromise with their partner.

I sympathize with the guys-but wonder about the times you said you courted your partner-in hopes of improving the situation-did you expect sex that night? It can take longer for the woman to come around to feeling emotionally fulfilled and ready for sex. To take her out and not expect sex in return would really turn some women on. They would then not think think you "expect it" and they would initiate it themselves.

To really take the time to ask about her day, her thoughts and feelings-all the time-and really want to hear what she says-is a womans dream If she gets that-then she is much more likely to feel loved-and want sex. But men often want sex in order to feel loved. We can be such opposites! Cruel reality of nature. Some compromise in the middle, along with communication can really help. Sometimes if the woman does just make it a priority to make sure her partners needs are met-then the whole situation can improve as well. If he gets some sex regularly-he will feel desired/appreciated more-and be more likely to want to communicate. Poor guys! Your needs actually can be very basic and simple. A good guy just wants some regular sex-then he probably will be happy and ready to do all the other million things that women want..talk....spend time...cuddle...make goals...go on dates. Women do seem to have much more complex wants and needs!
 cobaltblu
Joined: 3/6/2005
Msg: 12 (view)
 
I made a big change today.
Posted: 2/8/2008 8:09:59 PM
Awww I am sorry to hear that you have been going through all that. I think your post was very heartfelt and expressed well (especially for a guy-since guys don't always say what they are feeling.) I haven't read the posts/replies-except a little bit of the first one-and it looks a bit harsh. I wish you all the best. I hope you continue to move forward and heal. It sounds like a difficult situation. I think you are smart to talk about it if you feel like it-and relating to ppl that have been there as well. Do not let any negative comments get to you. Take care.
 cobaltblu
Joined: 3/6/2005
Msg: 42 (view)
 
The Sushi Thread
Posted: 2/6/2008 7:49:21 PM
Hmm...yummy sushi! It is addictive! I used to be very very picky about what I'd eat-and still am a bit. But I tried sushi the first time as few years ago when I went out to BC to visit my friend Leanne-and loved it! I would have never guessed I would love it-or even ever try it-but I decided to give it that one try-and was hooked.

It takes a while to get to know what to order...what you like...and trying new things is good-but ppl shouldn't be intimidated or say for sure that they know they will hate it. It is not slimey, or gooey or stinky in the least! It can get expensive-but a good quality, authentic, fresh place makes it worth it-or there are all you can eat places. Thankfully Barrie now has an all you can eat!

Its not really sushi-but tempura is one of my favs...yummy shrimp tempura. And the pieces of tuna or salmon sushi, and hand rolls and special rolls-I think my fav in Barrie is called Rainbow Dragon Roll-but I forget. Its got sushi on the outside of the roll-and inside-and avocado and its just great. I will go even all by myself because I love it so much-and its such a treat and a deal-as opposed to paying for take out. The "sushi" at places like Zehrs-or most malls that I have tried- just doesn't even compare to a real sushi restaurant-so to really give it a try-ppl should try the real stuff!
 cobaltblu
Joined: 3/6/2005
Msg: 38 (view)
 
career changes
Posted: 1/27/2008 10:29:21 AM
It is reassuring to read that I am not the only one that thinks about career change-and is unsure of what to do. I always did well in school as a kid-but once you get into the work force-and rely on a steady paycheque-the thought of going back to school-or trying a new job-let alone a whole new career is scarey. As a kid I just thought if I worked hard and did well-I would be ok-but it takes more than that. There is need for change in order to be happy and hopefully get ahead a bit financally.
 cobaltblu
Joined: 3/6/2005
Msg: 122 (view)
 
Have you ever waited for a love?
Posted: 1/27/2008 4:57:05 AM
I have waited and hoped that someone I met and fell in love with would return. We met in Ontario and I knew that he was only here for less than a year. I knew he had to go back to his home/job in Quebec. We stayed in contact-and met for a vacation. I was unwilling to move there-and hoped he would someday move here. I always wished him all the best-even when he met new women and had new relationships-but always hoped he would be mine someday. For several years I idealized him as the man I wanted to be with. I finally started to lose that hope of being with him. I have no regrets. He was recently back in my area for a week-we went for dinner. It was nice to see him-but I no longer had that desire for him to be mine.
 cobaltblu
Joined: 3/6/2005
Msg: 57 (view)
 
Why are you here? Seriously...
Posted: 1/25/2008 3:25:44 PM
You expect the guys to say in their first email.."Lets meet for coffee?" I don't. I am here in the least to pass the time and read the forums...and more so to hope to make a connection with someone enough to chat on msn...talk on the phone..and meet..and hope it is a match. I would truly love to date.... leading to a serious/long term relationship but even 1 damn email saying "would like to more about you" sounds good to me! Especially if you feel the same way about him! Then ask him to meet you for coffee!

I can see if you are frustrated that many ppl seemed interested..but then never followed through with trying to get to know you..and wanting to meet. It happens a lot. Don't take it personal.
 cobaltblu
Joined: 3/6/2005
Msg: 2 (view)
 
just deleteing
Posted: 1/25/2008 2:19:39 PM
Ok...but....
1-what does "just deleting" have to do with your long run on sentence?

2-if there is going to be any words on the tattoo-I hope he can spell better than you can

3-stay in school kids..learn english..read books...punctuation is your friend

4-congrats on maybe meeting someone..and getting a free tattoo

5-blogs/diaries/journals are for writing stuff you want to write....FORUMS are for discusions/questions/voicing an opinion (they all work better with punctuation)

 cobaltblu
Joined: 3/6/2005
Msg: 81 (view)
 
Too Accomplished
Posted: 1/24/2008 5:14:29 PM
I either find them to be so totally pompous and full of themselves that its a complete turn off-or I do find them to be genuinely accomplished ppl-and possibly in a higher status of income and life style compared to myself-and still think we might not be compatible. I prefer guys with a little edge to them/or at least just down to earth... I'm definately not looking for a soap-opera kinda pretty boy.
 cobaltblu
Joined: 3/6/2005
Msg: 180 (view)
 
Will successful women date a less sucessful man?
Posted: 1/24/2008 5:04:39 PM
My "success" is nothing major-but I am intelligent, did well in school, went to post secondary school, look after myself and pay the bills. I do not look for "success" in a guy-especially not financial or status related. I look for manners, respect, mutual attraction-and someone that has enough work ethic to pay their bills. I am not in the least impressed with BMWs-but I am impressed with honest/hard working/happy ppl.
 cobaltblu
Joined: 3/6/2005
Msg: 1 (view)
 
Do you care about finances when dating?
Posted: 1/24/2008 4:39:03 PM
I was just reading another thread where a guy asked what women mean when they say "I feel safe with him". He asked whether it possibly meant physically safe or maybe financally. That got me thinking that I actually think the opposite of what that poster was thinking in terms of finances. I just want to find a regular, nice guy to be a partner..not someone well off financally. I find it intimidating if someone has tons of money. I do not lead a jet set life style..so I couldn't afford to spend time at country clubs, fancy restaurants, expensive vacations etc. I tend to be turned off by profiles/ppl that seem to be really high maintenance. Do other ppl think this way too? Or do most ppl not think about it? Or do most ppl want to "date up" (so to speak).

This also gets me thinking in terms of looks as well. I sometimes also think that some guys look outta my league-or too pretty! I kinda think I have a certain niche myself-in the working class/average looking but intelligent/nice person genre.....and stick to looking for a similar mate.
 cobaltblu
Joined: 3/6/2005
Msg: 75 (view)
 
What do women mean when they say I feel safe with him?
Posted: 1/24/2008 4:19:13 PM
For myself "feeling safe" with a guy means that I find him physically strong and manly-but that I know he would never, ever hurt me, raise a finger to harm me-or use his strength to over power me in a negative way. Obviously that goes beyond physical trust-it also shows emotional trust. Ideally-as others have stated-this leads to long term trust to know that the person accepts you completely for who you are. For me-it has absolutely nothing to do with finances.
 cobaltblu
Joined: 3/6/2005
Msg: 7 (view)
 
What am I doing wrong
Posted: 1/24/2008 2:22:53 PM
I don't think you are doing anything wrong from what I can see from your profile. But I think I am in the same situation as you-and I think that sometimes if we are searching and hoping too much to find someone -that the pressure gets us frustrated. Try to keep your spirits up and keep positive that you will find your match.
 cobaltblu
Joined: 3/6/2005
Msg: 13 (view)
 
Welfare ?
Posted: 1/5/2008 6:37:36 AM
Lela:

Please do not call yourself stupid and an idiot! It does sound like you have had many challenges in your life already-but that does not mean that things cannot improve. I am glad you are finishing your high school courses-that is very important.

I hope you have people...family/friends/doctor/counselor..there are even online groups for support for ppl with depression...to talk to and help you. Even the Employment Resource Centres we have here in Ontario have good people and information about careers and training. I think you first need to make sure you are healthy and then you will be better able to search for and keep a job. Maybe the jobs you had in the past weren't right for you. Or you were not feeling well enough then to focus on the job.

I wish you all the best. Please try to seek some help to improve your situation and not lose hope.
 cobaltblu
Joined: 3/6/2005
Msg: 5 (view)
 
First date interrogations
Posted: 12/9/2007 8:05:43 AM
I have been surprised in the past when dating with guys that have done the same thing. I have been asked even in the first msn conversation if i own a home, if I want to have kids, what I drive...it can seem like a job interview as oppossed to getting to know someone!
 cobaltblu
Joined: 3/6/2005
Msg: 1 (view)
 
Possibly moving to Calgary
Posted: 10/27/2007 4:57:36 AM
Hi!
I thought i'd write a post to see if anyone has any advice regarding moving to Calgary. I have been thinking about it. A friend of mine moved there recently-she likes it. And there seem to be so many jobs-that pay well also. I have heard it is hard to find a good place to live at a reasonable price. It seems as though it is a good place with friendly ppl. Any advice/hints/info would be greatly appreciated.

Thanks!
 cobaltblu
Joined: 3/6/2005
Msg: 159 (view)
 
If you're single and not dating, what's your reason?
Posted: 7/28/2007 7:49:19 AM
Quality over quantity. I don't want to go out on dates just for the sake of it. I want it to be because both myself and the guy are interested in each other.

If you want to talk numbers....I'd guess that 49% of the guys out there arent interested in me...and 49% of the guys out there arent my type.....so I wait for the rare 2% that come along when we are both interested in each other!
 cobaltblu
Joined: 3/6/2005
Msg: 29 (view)
 
Rejected by that harmony site! LOL
Posted: 7/28/2007 7:39:10 AM
Consider yourself lucky! Saves you wasting your $ on such an expensive site. You dont get to view any profiles-unless they match you. The matches can be odd...no pic....can't be matched based on physical appearance/preferences...only on their questionaire. It does seem to be best suited for desparate American bible thumpers!!
 cobaltblu
Joined: 3/6/2005
Msg: 20 (view)
 
Old vs New sex style
Posted: 7/1/2007 5:47:36 PM
I can see her point of view if she is maybe a little ashamed of or regrets her past at all. Maybe some of the things she did-and that you are suggesting now-weren't that great for her. Maybe she felt less loved and more objectified doing certain things in the past. If she is happy that things are going well with you-that the relationship, and the sex- is mature and loving-she does not want to lower things to a kinkier level. It is nice to spice things up a little-but some things are more on the strange/kinky/bizarre level and once a girl goes there-she may wish she hadn't. Guys rarely have any regrets is my guess. I also think that some ppl (mostly guys) really start to rely on the kinkier things once they have tried them. It is very sad to me that young kids these days (god i sound old!!!) seem to think that casual bjs/threesomes/anal etc is just the norm and no big deal. Whatever happened to regular sex between 2 loving ppl!?
 cobaltblu
Joined: 3/6/2005
Msg: 36 (view)
 
What does everyone think of Avril Lavignes Girlfriend video?
Posted: 6/22/2007 8:18:03 PM
I'm not sure what I think of the video.......because I havent seen it...and you couldnt pay me enough money for me to subject myself to watchin it!

I did a forum search of her name to see if anyone else was as sick of her as myself. I used to here ppl complain about her in the past-and I didnt have an opinion of her music one way or the other...it was just forgettable. BUT now this new whiney girlfriend song is played on the station we have at work...and I often wish I was deaf!!!!!!!!! It truly sounds like a 5 yrs old having a tantrum. And now theres another song of hers that they keep playing!! Please make it stop! Its soooo bad.
(but not quite as bad as that "My Humps" song by Fergie)
 cobaltblu
Joined: 3/6/2005
Msg: 44 (view)
 
shot dowwwwwn in a blaaaaaaze of glory
Posted: 6/9/2007 4:47:00 AM
I have usually had good responses when I have approached someone to talk to. The few times that I have been "shot down"-I just figure it wasn't meant to be. The ocassions when I wasn't gutsy enough to approach someone are the times I regret.
 cobaltblu
Joined: 3/6/2005
Msg: 41 (view)
 
What are your boundaries?
Posted: 6/2/2007 7:09:05 PM
From the moment you meet someone-you are getting to know them-so basically we are all "looking for red flags" right from the beginning. There are either things that we are attracted to-or not attracted to. Finding someone that has more positives than negatives-is the key.

The things I will not tolerate are:
disrespect
rotten teeth
drug use
alcohol abuse
cheating
lying

How far will I go in maintaining my boundaries?.....I guess I run the risk of going so far as to leave this life without finding my true match. But I will not compromise on basic respect/caring/love in order to settle.
 cobaltblu
Joined: 3/6/2005
Msg: 101 (view)
 
Isn't it proper for the man to let the woman order before him ?
Posted: 4/15/2007 8:54:48 PM
I have never heard of this "rule of etiquette" and I think is sounds ridiculous. What does it matter who orders first? I really really see no disrespect with a guy just ordering his meal!

I guess I must apologize to the OP. I didnt realize that "women like me ruin it for women who want to be treated with respect!" Sorry-Princess-thats complete nonsense! I think you are being completely unreasonable, demanding and closed minded.

I will never allow a man to disrespect me-but you're just sweating the small stuff. I would not tolerate a man that was intentionally rude or ignorant to my feelings-but old fashioned/out dated habits and courting rituals have changed. I can open doors myself, drive myself places, pay for meals and order my own meal.

Maybe thats why I like casual/down to earth people and restaurants-too many snotty/stuck up people out there!

Relax and enjoy life.
 cobaltblu
Joined: 3/6/2005
Msg: 42 (view)
 
Are you European … or what?
Posted: 4/15/2007 8:08:38 PM
You wish more white people would call themselves european?! What an odd wish!

You can keep wishing for years and years to come with this white girl. I am Canadian!!

I often find it a turn off/pompous/strange/misleading that many guys call themselves european on their profile.....and when getting to know them-they say they were born and raised in North America (Canada or US). I guess to some ppl they think it makes them look more exotic/cultured to be european? I prefer down to earth guys-not anyone thats trying to impress or seem wordly when they aren't.

I recently got an email from a guy who's profile stated that he was looking for a european woman. I had to resist the urge to explain to him that Canada was not part of Europe, or to make the previously mentioned jokes about "you're a peein".

I can even see that some ppl may be more attracted to/compatible with certain cultures example-caucasian/or asian/or african american etc. But i don't relate to the whole contient of Europe! I was born and raised in Canada-and damn proud of it. Even though it might not seem all that fancy or exotic!
 cobaltblu
Joined: 3/6/2005
Msg: 32 (view)
 
Are there a lot of singles who havent married over 30 ?
Posted: 4/15/2007 7:08:29 PM
I am 33/never married/no kids. Sometimes it seems like I am some odd/rare person-to not have gotten married or had kids like most people seem to. But there does seem to be more and more people in the same situation.

I wonder-of those of us that have never been married-how many have parents that stayed together happily married? How many saw unhappy adult role models/divorce?
 cobaltblu
Joined: 3/6/2005
Msg: 49 (view)
 
Do YOU believe we get what we Expect or what we Deserve?
Posted: 4/15/2007 6:38:30 PM
Very interesting topic/discussion/thread. For myself-my expectations change over time. I used to not hope for much/certainly not expect or feel I deserved much in terms of relationships. That really was immaturity and self preservation. I feared committment/being hurt/being in a bad relationship-so I didn't aspire to have a healthy long term relationship. In that instance-I got what I wished for! Nothing!

I see that it was my thinking that got me no where. If you don't expect/hope for/ or think you deserve a great relationship-of course it won't happen!

Now I do hope for a healthy, wonderful, long term relationship. At times I thought I had to expect it or really believe that i deserved it-in order for it to happen. I do also believe that i have lots to offer as well. But to expect a great relationship or feel i deserve it-can lead to dissapointment and heart ache when times goes by and it hasn't occured. So-now i am back to hoping. But that is better than being hopeless!

A worry i have is about karma...which i suppose is my term for my doubts about me deserving a great guy. I just wonder if my old expectations/thoughts of always seeing myself alone are still haunting me? If maybe in my past-when I thought being single forever would be a great life-I somehow sealed my fate? I pushed some potential good guys away in the past-due to fear. Even now in dating-i do think so much more about long term possibilities-but often discount people as not being my match. And the few times I have really liked the guy-and hoped for more-they have said i expect too much? Because they just want to date-and I want to date them exclusively-hoping for long term. Total reverse of my prior problem!

Ok-probaly too much info! I'm rambling-I better stfu.
 cobaltblu
Joined: 3/6/2005
Msg: 42 (view)
 
HAVE YOU EVER DATED YOUR OWN SIGN?
Posted: 4/15/2007 3:33:07 PM
I don't put a great emphasis into astrology when trying to find a mate. But I do see some vailidity in regards to signs/personality and compatability in general terms. I am a typical Leo...loyal, passionate, caring, but can be stubborn, proud and tempermental!

I am willing to date a Leo-but I have had more success with Taurus men (i find them very attractive/manly/strong) and I have dated Virgo men. I think that Aries men might be a more calm sign..a better match? Who knows? Its just a matter of 2 people really feeling interested in each other-no matter what their sign is!
 cobaltblu
Joined: 3/6/2005
Msg: 49 (view)
 
the weekend 'fade'
Posted: 4/7/2007 6:47:57 AM
I have never thought of it as "the weekend fade"-but I have thought of it as "the internet disappearing act".

I have been disappointed/upset by being forgotten about before-but it really is just how internet dating works i guess! I have had guys not show up for a first meeting, i have had guys cancel right at the very last inute, guys that never log back onto msn to chat...the whole nine yards.

I will never stand anyone on up-or cancel plans I have made...but I have had the feeling of no connection or attraction/interest in someone-and just stop emailing or chatting with them on msn. I usually try to let them know that I dont think that we are a match-and wish them luck.

Its all quite sad-that we don't always give people a chance-to get to know them. But sometimes the spark/interest just isn't there. We just need to wait for the rare time when the interest is mutual and hope that works out in the end!
 cobaltblu
Joined: 3/6/2005
Msg: 44 (view)
 
How long have you been using internet dating sites...
Posted: 4/1/2007 6:47:09 PM
OP-I can see how you might be losing hope-but its better to keep trying than to give up. Have you not met some nice ppl? A few good dates? Friends? A relationship of a few months at least?

I first joined internet dating sites in 2004. That sounds so long ago! Maybe it was 2005?! Its all a blur. No real success story yet....and a few odd stories to tell.... But no real regrets either. When I first joined sites-it was just for fun. Then I got to a point in life that I really wanted something more-and tried to search for something meaningful.

Maybe thats my biggest mistake? Searching for a serious relationship on the internet!?
 cobaltblu
Joined: 3/6/2005
Msg: 15 (view)
 
All she wants to do is watch porn,have sex ,watch sports and drink beer
Posted: 3/25/2007 7:14:07 PM
I am so sorry to hear of your plight! Poor guy!! Please don't tell me that she had the nerve to want to cook and clean for you too? Or pay your bills? Or tell you that you were the most awesome guy in the world?

I know women can be cruel. Try to hang in there buddy. Hopefully no woman will ever treat you like that again.
 cobaltblu
Joined: 3/6/2005
Msg: 2 (view)
 
Are my pictures the problem?
Posted: 3/3/2007 7:42:04 PM
Your profile looks quite fine to me. It seems honest/has some good info-a little humor and good pics.

The only little piece of advice I could give is that your profession of "aministrator" should probably say "administrator" ( i think!). And honestly-I don't think the pic of you in the red shirt is very flattering. It just kinda looks odd-like you have your chest sticking out and arms arms back at a strange angle. (i'm not intending to be insulting or rude-just giving my opinion).

Best wishes!
 cobaltblu
Joined: 3/6/2005
Msg: 44 (view)
 
Would you kiss someone with Black teeth????
Posted: 2/25/2007 5:49:04 PM
Definate turn off/deal breaker to me! I have it right on my profile that I am attracted to a nice smile. I didn't want to go into more graphic detail then that-but hope its clear what I mean.

I agree with what OTB posted in the first post there-but why is it a bad deal for "men"? I am a woman and I have met guys that had yucky teeth and other odd traits. I don't see how this topic-or almost any dating/online dating issue is gender specific?
 cobaltblu
Joined: 3/6/2005
Msg: 19 (view)
 
How do keep yourself from becoming bitter?
Posted: 2/25/2007 7:34:11 AM
I try to keep hopeful that everything happens for a reason, that I will find my match sometime soon, that I'd rather be single and searching for the right match-then settle for less. I try to forgive and forget when things don't work out. I try to see my role in whats happening in my life-and what I can do to change it. I try to get to know new people/trust them/not make snap judgments. I try to see the lesson in everything I do. I'm not so sure that I'm truly doing whats right-but I'm trying!
 cobaltblu
Joined: 3/6/2005
Msg: 4 (view)
 
The importance of friends
Posted: 2/25/2007 7:16:30 AM
I think friends are very important. I was new to this city a few years ago-and had to make new friends. You have to be willing to go out to new places/meet new people/be open and friendly/talkative-so that people enjoy spending time with you.

I know it can be difficult-I have been more cautious lately-less likely to get out and try new things/meet new people-and it doesn't help. You have to get out there and make an effort. Be friendly/approachable/open to talking to anyone. Sometimes when we are looking for friends-we hope they will come to us-but we need to make the first steps and talk to people/start a conversation.
 
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