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 Author Thread: how come some women are man magnets and others perpetually single?
 andreabeaumont
Joined: 1/10/2013
Msg: 67 (view)
 
how come some women are man magnets and others perpetually single?
Posted: 3/30/2013 1:13:59 PM

To get the type you are interested in you need to be very good looking... and you are not.
or your father has to be influential... he probably isn't
or you have to come from an old, established family... no way


i just absolutely LOVE how you think you know anything about me at all to make any of these baseless claims.

*rolls eyes*


To get these guys you must also win over their families... you don't have what it takes and most likely never will. No charm, no grace and a dubious background. They marry their own. That's all there is to it. I can see it all now... some matronly old lady with her pearls and cameo fainting because her little Johnny is cavorting with some internet strumpet. Oh, the shame! The scandal!


LOL.LOL.LOL.


You still have a few years to retool and rehabilitate yourself but once you reach 30 you are done. Better get to it.


not going to dignify this with a response.
 andreabeaumont
Joined: 1/10/2013
Msg: 66 (view)
 
The reason you are perpetually single is because you are holding out for a specific type of man, pre
Posted: 3/30/2013 1:10:29 PM

C-u-n-t, don't ad hominem me (attack my character) just because you can't take constructive criticism of your need to be pampered and doted upon. You have an overly strong sense of entitlement, and there is a huge difference between having expectations and preferences of potential relationships, and having unrealistic expectations and preferences of would be partners. If you do have an education it does not show in your literature, comprehension, or ability to be subjective. Matter of fact, you have an inability in all these cases.


HAHAHA. i did'nt even have to point out your lack of class; you did it so yourself. resorting to calling women sexually charged names because you can't hold up your end of an intellectual debate is a classic white-trash move. i didn't honestly expect much better.



When you objectify men negatively as opposed to positively you put up a great big sign that says the following: stay away from me I'm only after your money, career, and securities. I haven't judged or critiqued you beyond what you've written here on the forums or what you've shown in your profile. Your anecdotes mean absolutely nothing when trying to attract another human being--unless that individual is just so completely shallow you need a resume of fine dining, ballroom attendances, and a Bentley to even register on their dating radar.


it must be a nice self-defense mechanism this world view of yours where you paint every hard working successful individual as "superficial" and "shallow" and see them as a sum of their worldly possessions. it probably makes you feel better about yourself. :)


Good luck catching your "sugar daddy" because I guarantee you're going to be nothing more than a fling and nothing less than a one night stand, and especially when you try and reach outside your world views.


you are such a gentleman. :)
 andreabeaumont
Joined: 1/10/2013
Msg: 65 (view)
 
how come some women are man magnets and others perpetually single?
Posted: 3/30/2013 12:54:14 PM
i did kiss him...AFTER he broke up with his girlfriend.
 andreabeaumont
Joined: 1/10/2013
Msg: 33 (view)
 
how come some women are man magnets and others perpetually single?
Posted: 3/25/2013 9:38:51 AM

OP I'm not attacking what you do for work, but as a live in baby sitter you probably make as much as the server, barista, or grocery clerk you are looking past. The only difference is your employer provides you with a place to live and access to vehicle to use. Two big expenses the server, barista and grocery clerk has to deal with.

Maybe the guys you are interested in wants someone who isn't a live in baby sitter


i've never encountered a guy who has had a problem with my side job as a babysitter- in fact most seem very attracted to the whole "nurturing/maternal" side to me. also keep in mind this isn't my primary job- i live in the dc metro area where its really tough to break into the international development field as a recent college grad. during the day we have "fancy" elitist jobs-during the evening we bartend, waitress, babysit to make ends meet.

i love how sore guys on here about my preference for ambitious men. haha. don't worry there are tons of hot girls who don't care for ambition or drive- you just got to find them.
 andreabeaumont
Joined: 1/10/2013
Msg: 29 (view)
 
how come some women are man magnets and others perpetually single?
Posted: 3/25/2013 7:39:47 AM

For some reason most men are all attracted to the same thing in women. That's why certain women get all the attention. And thinking about it I can't even define what that thing is. Reese Witherspoon just has that girl next door feel in spite of being gorgeous. Jennifer Anniston seems kinda snobbish and uppity to me, even though that may not be true. Myself, I find nothing more attractive than a girl who is beautful but still gives off that girl next door vibe. It's all in the vibe.


hmm interesting...i think for myself that i dont posses that "girl next door" vibe because...im not a "girl next door"- guys have likened me more to a "femme fatale" or like sophia vergara or Gaby Solis on Desperate Housewives...and i can come off as snobby and uppity....i guess its in how i was raised...
 andreabeaumont
Joined: 1/10/2013
Msg: 27 (view)
 
how come some women are man magnets and others perpetually single?
Posted: 3/25/2013 7:20:37 AM

You're objectifying men here in a negative way. Why are men from more humble professions an issue? You have a sense of entitlement, and why would men with more lucrative careers waste their time, effort, and money on an individual like you? Exactly what do you bring to the relationship--besides a lame character and personality?


LOL. what about my having preferences seems to personally offend you? people are allowed to have their preferences. im sorry that girls being attracted to high achieving smart put together guys makes you feel insecure- im not here to cater to your sense of self. :\

i would bring a lot to a potential relationship. im smart, have had some of the best education provided in the world, well traveled speak 5 languages have dined and wined with a gallery of the world's who-is-who. im also a sweetheart and lovely and would move mountains for someone i care for. its dangerous to judge people without knowing them ;)



What exactly do blondes have anything to do with your relationship issues? Why are you focusing on other individuals, and not focusing on what could be keeping the men you wish to attract away from you? Are you setting unrealistic expectations? How extreme are your world viewers? The age old adage, "the grass is greener on the other side" does not hold true in reality.


you have a point here...i was just pointing out an observation of mine that guys i find attractive tend to find girls like that attractive...perhaps my expectations are unrealistic...to think that a cute preppy white guy could fall for an exotic global nomad like me.
 andreabeaumont
Joined: 1/10/2013
Msg: 23 (view)
 
how come some women are man magnets and others perpetually single?
Posted: 3/24/2013 9:41:52 PM
Men tend to gravitate toward warm, friendly, and nurturing women -- women who will likely play a more submissive role in the relationship while supporting his best interests and enhancing his social influence. Women with a dominant, independent, or eccentric streak -- regardless of looks -- are not as attractive to men as long-term mates.


see its interesting to me that you would say that. i consider myself an extremely warm friendly and nurturing person. i usually always have a smile on my face and am very enthusiastic, peppy and cheerful. by virtue of living as a live-in babysitter to two adorable little boys, i am naturally nurturing and maternal haha. i also grew up in a large loving family with a doting father who treated me like a princess. so i consider myself very blessed and am thankful for all the love that has surrounded me thus far in life.

when it comes to gentlemen however, its a whole different story. last summer i met who i thought was this wonderful boy whom i fell very hard for. he fit the archetype that i have always found attractive: this cute preppy white southern boy with an intoxicating blend of ferocious erudition and puckishness. he was nerdy and so smart but also aloof and fratty. i was instantly smitten. when we met he had been with his college gf for four years but thought i was attractive and tried to kiss me at a party. i pushed him away and said that if he wanted to kiss me he'd have to wine and dine me and break up with his gf. he said he wasnt happy with her but he didnt know how to break up with her because he didnt want to hurt her feelings. he said she made him miserable- told him me was ugly, fat and a loser and she wouldnt believe him when he told her he loved her or that she was beautiful. long story short- he broke up with her and we dated a week later for a month. he introduced me to all his friends who said i was a "gem"- they were all glad he had found someone wholesome and normal and not a "psycho ****". all of a sudden he disappears. i dont like to chase men so after trying to contact him thrice i leave him be. 3 months later he starts drunk texting and dialing me saying he screwed up and was an idiot and he didn't realize how much the break up would affect him. i was morose after he disappeared so i take him back. we date again for a little over a month when he dumps me again. he says he still has feelings for his ex and that his heart is mixed up and i am an amazing girl who deserves someone who can give me his all. right now he said he cant do that and he doesn't want to treat me any less so he has to step back. this was during the holidays last year but he still drunk texts/dials me saying he misses me and dreams of me. :\

i was devastated- he was still in love with a girl who supposedly made him miserable and treated him badly. all of my kindness and affection was lost on him. :\ so...im not sure i believe in how guys want a sweet nice caring girl...in my experience they want ****es. this girl is apparently a "hateful" and "terrible" drama queen but she had something that made this really wonderful guy be with her for four whole years. and yet here i am...who is everything she is not and i get dumped because of memories of her. its such a mindfuck.

after this incident i am very shaken and deeply mistrust my naturally kind and sweet nature...should i be colder and ****ier to the guys i date now?
 andreabeaumont
Joined: 1/10/2013
Msg: 22 (view)
 
how come some women are man magnets and others perpetually single?
Posted: 3/24/2013 9:24:10 PM
spot4username that is my problem exactly i seem to always attract guys i am not interested in dating. baristas, waiters, grocery store clerks flock to me like birds. i get free stuff because of it all the time and am very flattered. but i am hopelessly attracted to WASPy nerdy guys with a slight touch of pretentiousness. unfortunately for me they tend to be attracted to vanilla blonde sorority girls- not worldly and sophisticated spicy middle eastern girls like me. :\
 andreabeaumont
Joined: 1/10/2013
Msg: 1 (view)
 
how come some women are man magnets and others perpetually single?
Posted: 3/24/2013 3:10:46 PM
so im kinda confused about how the dating game seems to work so well for some people and completely against others. there are some women who always seem to be falling into relationships, as if there is a line of guys ready to pick them up the moment they get on the market again. other women appear to be perpetually single without much luck attracting real commitment from the men.

just by looking at celebrity examples: reese witherspoon at a very young age managed to not only find a guy but also marry him for years to come until they divorced. and then just a year or two after her divorce in her mid thirties she dates jake gyllenhaal and then winds up with jim toth and is now a happily married woman again. jennifer aniston on the other hand married brad for 5 some years...was single/in a string of short flings for years before she finally met justin theuroux.

its just a passing observation on celebrity gossip but i've seen women in similar situations in real life as well. i have some girlfriends who fall from one relationship into another...and then there is me...26 years and have been pretty much perpetually single.

what gives?
 andreabeaumont
Joined: 1/10/2013
Msg: 3 (view)
 
how to meet guys in your mid twenties?
Posted: 3/21/2013 1:47:22 PM
Okay. Well I'd love to do the equivalent of "going back to school" and learn how to find a guy. Where do I start? How do I go about this?
 andreabeaumont
Joined: 1/10/2013
Msg: 1 (view)
 
how to meet guys in your mid twenties?
Posted: 3/21/2013 12:39:56 PM
hello dahlings,

so i recently turned 26 and am trying to do something about the fact that i happen to be perpetually single. my problem isn't that i am ugly or posses a horrid personality- i just don't meet any guys my age who are single. i have a very small circle of friends and they are all girls who also have a small number of friends. so the possibility of meeting a guy through them is non existent at the time. i am also sick of online dating and find the quality of guys on websites to be quite poor; either they are socially awkward, have low self esteem or plain creepy. WHERE can i come across normal smart cute single guys? im only in my mid twenties! it shouldnt be that hard!

so guys here's my question...where can i meet you guys? how can an attractive girl in her mid twenties put herself in a situation where she comes across many single guys?

any responses will be much appreciated!

:)
 
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