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 Author Thread: Long distance relation ship
 pat_983
Joined: 5/23/2005
Msg: 17 (view)
 
Long distance relation ship
Posted: 5/10/2006 6:12:19 PM
Hmmmmm..any relationship be it long distance..short distance...around the corner..next door depends on the people involved..if they are sincere, honest and true distance is not an issue. Meet when you can and let nature take it's cours..move slowly.
 pat_983
Joined: 5/23/2005
Msg: 32 (view)
 
Life is amazing..who would have thought???
Posted: 4/17/2006 4:29:12 PM
@ Stardust and jj...i'll find out if she would like to come to coffee night..and yep..been busy with lots of good stuff..both work and personal...things are just humming along..do miss those coffee nights tho. They were always fun.
 pat_983
Joined: 5/23/2005
Msg: 28 (view)
 
Life is amazing..who would have thought???
Posted: 4/17/2006 1:14:57 PM
@ roxy
hey hun...thanks.I miss ya all..but i have to say ..my time is well spent..lol
 pat_983
Joined: 5/23/2005
Msg: 27 (view)
 
Life is amazing..who would have thought???
Posted: 4/17/2006 11:46:20 AM
Way to go Justin...she has a good catch on her hands..I wish ya all the best amigo.. I still cruze the forums every now and again...not much time tho..but i will add a comment here and there if the topic is of interest. I enjoy the debate and sharing of opioions on the forums..since i've been here i've learned a lot..
I have to admit tho that my main reasons for dropping in is to see if any of my old friends have been hooked..
 pat_983
Joined: 5/23/2005
Msg: 16 (view)
 
Help Me Understand.....
Posted: 4/17/2006 11:33:19 AM
^^ Oh well..its an honest opinion..and ur correct ..she did open the door so all is fair..Kudos to you for not sending her a rude email.
Guess it's all relative..some will think she's cute and whitty some will say arrogance some to the point...all is good.
 pat_983
Joined: 5/23/2005
Msg: 14 (view)
 
Help Me Understand.....
Posted: 4/17/2006 11:27:14 AM
I don't see arrogance at all...I see someone who is stating quite clearly what she wants, who she is and what she's looking for. If your interests match then message ger if not then move on.
To me her profile is to the point.
P
 pat_983
Joined: 5/23/2005
Msg: 21 (view)
 
Life is amazing..who would have thought???
Posted: 4/17/2006 11:23:25 AM
@STILLALICIOUS
Thanks...She wishes to remain anonymous..Usually we have so precious few moments to spend together that we usually spend it with each other alone or with our families. I will definitely pass the idea by her but ultimately its up to her to decide.
 pat_983
Joined: 5/23/2005
Msg: 8 (view)
 
Help Me Understand.....
Posted: 4/17/2006 10:53:53 AM
Welcome to the world wide web where every a$$ H*** has an opinion and most have absolutely nothing of value to say. Hey..it happens just delete block and move on..don't let it get to ya.
Cheers,
Pat
 pat_983
Joined: 5/23/2005
Msg: 19 (view)
 
Life is amazing..who would have thought???
Posted: 4/17/2006 10:13:21 AM
@division-belle

I'm so happy for you sweetie. My flirt buddy extra-ordinaire! I never did get that beer with you *sigh* Ah well, it's all good.

I'm hearing lots of hopeful stories these days.....keeping my chin up, cuz you just never know


Friends can always have a beer together..course i don't drink beer but hey... Sides..now that spring has sprung I believe that you will be getting busy with all ur new and old suitors.... ...have fun.
 pat_983
Joined: 5/23/2005
Msg: 10 (view)
 
Who do you want your next partner to look like ?
Posted: 4/17/2006 9:09:14 AM
that's easy...I want my next partner to look. sound and be exactly like my current partner... Get the pic???
 pat_983
Joined: 5/23/2005
Msg: 16 (view)
 
Life is amazing..who would have thought???
Posted: 4/17/2006 9:04:45 AM
@partiallycooked

I miss forcing you to flirt with me at coffee!!!

^^ Awww helll I never had to be forced to flirt with you...
 pat_983
Joined: 5/23/2005
Msg: 13 (view)
 
Life is amazing..who would have thought???
Posted: 4/17/2006 8:33:58 AM
@ Kit..one of these days ur gonna get hooked and cooked before ya know what hit ya babe........Then one morning you'll get up and be posting athread like mine... .....and in th eimmortal words or agent 86 )of get smart fame for the younger folks) "lovin it"...
 pat_983
Joined: 5/23/2005
Msg: 11 (view)
 
Life is amazing..who would have thought???
Posted: 4/17/2006 8:24:31 AM
let's hear some success stories..I'm sure the newer members would appreciate a few words of encouragement to let them know that POF works
 pat_983
Joined: 5/23/2005
Msg: 9 (view)
 
Life is amazing..who would have thought???
Posted: 4/17/2006 8:13:48 AM
Hey Kit..was wondering when i would hear from you.... ..thanks hun...and I.m surprised that a catch like you is still in the pond...just goes to show how dumb a$$ us guys can be huh..????....
 pat_983
Joined: 5/23/2005
Msg: 7 (view)
 
Life is amazing..who would have thought???
Posted: 4/17/2006 7:57:48 AM
I have seen a lot of good news stories lately grom other POF's..i think that usually we see way too much of the negative side and not enough of the positive..If you have a positive up beat post why not let folks know??
 pat_983
Joined: 5/23/2005
Msg: 6 (view)
 
Life is amazing..who would have thought???
Posted: 4/17/2006 7:38:57 AM
^^^ I think ur sister is right...just enjoy the journey....As for me..well so far so good...we both met the families and that went very well..the rest is up to us..and we are working on it..its a growth experiance...like ur sister said..pieces are still falling into place. bu the picture is starting to come into focus and i like what I see...
I'll be ur publicist any day .. ..not a problem..
 pat_983
Joined: 5/23/2005
Msg: 4 (view)
 
Life is amazing..who would have thought???
Posted: 4/17/2006 7:24:43 AM
Hey pearl..thanks....When i look at the great people on POF just waiting to be scooped up it amazes me that you guys and gals are still here...someone is missing out on a great experiance by not contacting you and saying let meet and get to know each other a little better.
 pat_983
Joined: 5/23/2005
Msg: 1 (view)
 
Life is amazing..who would have thought???
Posted: 4/17/2006 7:17:56 AM
I have not posted in a while..I have logged on and read a few times and i see a lot of newbies and the regulars so I figured what the hey.
Anyway..what i'm posting about. Just when you think that life is destined to be a long haul..a big tedoius search and you start wondering if there is really happiness to be found out there..is the BS worthwhile....kaboom....I have been extrememly lucky..since my first brave steps on POF and meeting some fantastic people I lucked out and met the most amazing partner. Its been almost 4 months now and every day the bonds get stronger. I never would have guessed that I could feel this way again...someone pinch me...
The object lesson is simply that there is someone out there for us..there is a diamond in the pile of..rocks...sometimes its laying on top and sometimes we have to dig. Have courage and faith and you will find yours.
Lets hope that this small insignificant inspiration from little ole me gives someone the courage they need to look a little harder and not give up..It is possible to find happiness again or in some cases for the first time....lets wish us all the best of luck. God bless guys.
Pat
 pat_983
Joined: 5/23/2005
Msg: 31 (view)
 
Black man's hatred for the white man??? come on guys
Posted: 3/28/2006 6:52:18 AM
^^^ @mardioluv4u..That was well said..the problem is that in the worls we live it hatred exsits. Its unfortunate but it does exist.
given the choice..I would rather deal with a vocal out and out racist and know exactly where I stand rather than deal with someone who harbours these thoughts in their heart and show it in other more subtle ways that in the long run are even more hurtful and damaging.
 pat_983
Joined: 5/23/2005
Msg: 28 (view)
 
Black man's hatred for the white man??? come on guys
Posted: 3/28/2006 6:27:19 AM
^^^ @mardioluv4u.. Your post is somewhat disjointed. What are you trying to say?
 pat_983
Joined: 5/23/2005
Msg: 25 (view)
 
Black man's hatred for the white man??? come on guys
Posted: 3/26/2006 7:18:57 PM
I hear you...it all comes down to foolish pride and complexes..OK..was born and grew up in the caribbean.mostly coloured folks..everyone got along yet still the black (african heritage) folks were discrominatory against the other groups..and the esat indian heritage is the same..and the oriental segment the same...blah blah blah...
It comes down to one human being feeling superior to another..it's just hate and comparison...stupid stuff..when will people learn
 pat_983
Joined: 5/23/2005
Msg: 23 (view)
 
Black man's hatred for the white man??? come on guys
Posted: 3/26/2006 5:58:40 PM

Considering my job I have seen affirmative action at it's worst and best. Twenty years ago, women and minorities were terribly discriminated against in the workfield despite their equal qualifications. After affirmative action, they were still discriminated against by co-workers who assumed they only got the job because of their gender or race not because they deserved the position more than someone else


This is so true..it seems to be a lose lose situation at times..and what makes it worse is governments and other work places trying to cure this problem overnight by filling a quota.

By the way there are some work environments that are still like this..sad but true.

@ PPP...no offence bro..I do believe that it depends on what side of the fence you are standing on..believe me...being a person of colour and going to some places actually many places...more so in the USA is still scary...
 pat_983
Joined: 5/23/2005
Msg: 12 (view)
 
Black man's hatred for the white man??? come on guys
Posted: 3/26/2006 1:28:51 PM
@ JP...well said
 pat_983
Joined: 5/23/2005
Msg: 10 (view)
 
Black man's hatred for the white man??? come on guys
Posted: 3/26/2006 1:26:25 PM
Affirmative action was never meant to be used in the way it is being used..It was meant as a way of ensuring that women, visible minorities etc are allowed the same equal opportunities as everyone else..unfortunately somewhere along the line it was messed up and now people i.e. women, visible minorities are hired because they are who they are not because they can do the job..not to say that they can't mind you.
Th eway the affirmative action program is used now is degrading..as a member of a visible minority I want to get a job because i qualify for it and can do it..I want to be hired because i am capable and meet the requirments of the job not because of the colour of my skin or my ethnicity or gender etc...
If we had a level playing field then affirmative action would never have been introduced..and never would have been corrupted the way it is..
 pat_983
Joined: 5/23/2005
Msg: 7 (view)
 
Black man's hatred for the white man??? come on guys
Posted: 3/26/2006 12:48:51 PM
The prize always goes to the vocal few..a few members of an ethnic group say stupid things and they get the spotlight..and the entire ethnic group gets branded....instead lets look at the individual..look at the heart...
 pat_983
Joined: 5/23/2005
Msg: 2 (view)
 
Black man's hatred for the white man??? come on guys
Posted: 3/26/2006 12:31:55 PM
Don't you guys think that as a species we have come too far to still be racist?
 pat_983
Joined: 5/23/2005
Msg: 1 (view)
 
Black man's hatred for the white man??? come on guys
Posted: 3/26/2006 12:19:22 PM
I don't know how long this thread will last but I read the following in another thread and i just could not address it without hijacking that thread so I started this one..(entire quote below)

First of all..I do believe that the gentleman who wrote this is much more enlightned that this statement makes him look...
I can't agree with the view that the "strongest racism out there is the black man's hatred of the white man."...simply not true..racism exists in white communities,,in brown communities..in black communities..etc...no ethnic group has the corner on racism...withing every ethnic and socioeconomic group racism exists..it's wrong .it's destructive..and it's foolish..Racism brings out the best and the worse in people..don't let a racist warp your sense of values and end up making statements like my friend..


I say fvck everyone who tries to tell me I can't say what I wanna say. But, one has to consider other rights such as the right to enjoy life free of discrimination and cultural hinderances. There does come a point when freedom of speech must be curtailed to preserve everybody else's freedoms. I, for example, do not think your freedom of speech should be preserved if you choose to use it to degrade me because I have long hair. I do not believe that a coloured man's freedom of speech should be protected should he choose to use it to call out whitey all the time. "It is because of the White Man that I can not get financing on my new car! The Wite man opress me! White man is a foolish man! FVCK the White man!" I have heard it - it is not, imho, freedom of speech there. It's racism, and that is another thread, cause I think some of the strongest racism out there is the black man's hatred of the white man.

As with everything, there must be a balance somewhere, somehow. Simple as that.
 pat_983
Joined: 5/23/2005
Msg: 13 (view)
 
Childhoods...Do We Ever Forget? Can We?
Posted: 3/26/2006 12:05:28 PM
Can we forget???..i think the question is should we forget...and my answer is no..never..our past shaped us into who we are today....Don't forget but don't be a victim all of our life..at some point we must come to terms with the fact that we had no hand in the matter(s)...we were not at fault..we were victims.
Learn from the psat...promise never to do to anyone what was done to us...forgive and move ahead with our lives....every situation provides us with an opportunity to either grow or freeze in time..don't freeze...
Here is the thing about forgiveness..it helps us and heals us more then those we are forgiving..(by the way..i mean sincere forgiveness)....so forgive..but never forget..and grow.
Pat
 pat_983
Joined: 5/23/2005
Msg: 6 (view)
 
Why? Just Why?
Posted: 3/25/2006 6:37:36 AM
Substitute guys with gals..and men with women and you have the same situation from a male perspective...
Bottom line ..it's not a male or female thing..it's a human thing..an individual personality thing..a people thing...so stop stereotyping...
 pat_983
Joined: 5/23/2005
Msg: 125 (view)
 
Bald is beautiful!
Posted: 3/25/2006 5:44:30 AM
Not that I have much of a choice but being bald (ing) is pretty convenient, and judging from the responses i've had over the years sexy...At one point many years ago i even considered having a transplant done...mostly to please other people...I obviously decided not to..I'm quite comfortable with my appearance...some like it some don't ..what counts is I'm ok with it and my sweetie is obviously enthralled with me so that's enough for me.
I may decide to do a transplant at some point in future but if I do it will be because i want it. Who ever likes me has to do so because of me the whole package not just the hair or no hair issue...
 pat_983
Joined: 5/23/2005
Msg: 31 (view)
 
Love , the way it should be for a woman!!!
Posted: 3/18/2006 9:24:36 AM
OK...reality check

Find a guy who calls you beautiful instead of hot
Umm I don't see anything wrong with a man telling his special woman that she's hot


Who wants to spend every minute of the day with you, Who calls you up when he is thinking of you,

Honeymoon phase..take a few months and the day to day reality of living with each other and this will be gone.


Who isn’t afraid to say i love you, in front of his friends

Yep..for sure...


Who calls you back when you hang up on him

Hell no...if she hangs up on me that's rude..now when she calls back to apologize then I will be a gentleman and accept and forgive and let it pass..never to be mentioned again


Who will stay awake just to watch you sleep.

Ok this is sappy but I have to admit I've done it...


Wait for the guy who kisses your forehead, Who wants to show you off to the world when you are in your sweats, Who holds your hand in front of his friends, Wait for the one who is constantly reminding you of how much he Cares about you and how lucky he is to have you. Wait for the one who turns to his friends and says, "...that's her."

Ok...redundant...see above..and just wayyy to childish foe me..My actions with her will do all of these things..I don't have to make a special effort to promote to the world..as long as she knows

The one who treats you like a person, The one who can always make you laugh,
Yeah baby...absolutely for sure...


The one who makes you feel safe when he holds you

This is a necessity


The one who treats you like a person

This is just simple respect..applies to everyone


The one who will always be there for you no matter what

I used to say this but now i have put in some qualifiers...sorry but reality check


Ok...i'm done..
 pat_983
Joined: 5/23/2005
Msg: 13 (view)
 
Does any one give someone a chance any more??
Posted: 3/18/2006 8:49:40 AM
Just an FYI...I believe that every newbie comes here and posts this exact thread..hell i did soooo many months ago...it's just part of the natural evolution of dating sites i guess.
There are those who come on and withing a week find someone they click with..others have been here for months or years and are still looking. I've had my messages deleted so many time that it's now become amusing. The flip side is the person who i ended up clicking with messaged me. Just chill out and enjoy making friends on the forums..it's a great place to be.
 pat_983
Joined: 5/23/2005
Msg: 6 (view)
 
The value of friends
Posted: 3/18/2006 7:20:00 AM
@pandora...Accept my sympathies.
This is going to sound stupid but i'll say it anyway..Death is always hardest in those left alive. When someone close to us passes the ones who remain are left to ponder the loss..and fill the void. Whoever said that one person does not make a difference is so very wrong. The question you have to ask is....if the loved one were here and alive would they want to see you so sad because of them? My thoughts are with you. God bless
 pat_983
Joined: 5/23/2005
Msg: 3 (view)
 
How to Understand This???
Posted: 3/12/2006 7:01:31 AM
Life is a conondrum...go figure..
 pat_983
Joined: 5/23/2005
Msg: 101 (view)
 
Thoughts and advice on long distance relationships
Posted: 3/11/2006 8:36:37 AM
Some of the downsides of LD relationships can be travel especially in the winter and not being able to share some mid week time together.
One of the biggest advantages of this relationship is that the time we do spend together is special and cherished. Every minute counts.
During the week we both have our own things to do and try to spend as much time together on the weekend with each other as we can.
We talk on the phone alot(both of us just changed phone plans so we can get the most for our money) have msn and text each other daily.
Yeah I miss him alot during the week but that just makes the weekend more enjoyable

This is virtually identical to our ldr...and yep.the weekends are wow!!!..usually we chat on msn every night. Phone comes in when we just have to hear each others voice..
Hey..so far so good..my advice...don't let distance be a barrier.

ok..quick after thought..this works because we both know what we want...no playing...no messing around...trust and maturity is essential...ok..i'll quit lecturing..
 pat_983
Joined: 5/23/2005
Msg: 23 (view)
 
anyone got there taxes files yet
Posted: 3/10/2006 6:08:59 PM
I just net filed for me and my son today..I never go to H & R blockheads. Just go buy the software and ur home free.
 pat_983
Joined: 5/23/2005
Msg: 10 (view)
 
Unconditional Love - from your pet!
Posted: 3/10/2006 4:20:50 PM
@ThatsAmore....Your story hit home with me in more ways than one. When I was a teenager I had an alsatian. Got her from when she was about 3 months old. She slept with me on my bed till she just got too big (never stopped her from being on the bed when i was not there. When she was agound 13 she developed arthritis in the hips..she was crippled and we had to have her put down. As a teenager one of the few times I remember crying was when she was put to sleep.
Reading your story brought that back like wow!..now I'm sitting here almost 30 years after and i can still see her just like it was yesterday..some pain never leaves.
 pat_983
Joined: 5/23/2005
Msg: 3 (view)
 
How do you ask your NEW mate about past sexual partners?
Posted: 3/10/2006 3:52:49 PM
question is do you really want to know?
 pat_983
Joined: 5/23/2005
Msg: 4 (view)
 
Unconditional Love - from your pet!
Posted: 3/10/2006 3:42:26 PM

I was sitting here looking at her and trying to understand why some humans cannot match the unconditional love that a pet gives.

I don't think that humans are uncapable of unconditional love. I think we grow out of that capability. Abous 2 weeks ago I visited my daughter to spend some time with her and my 1 year old grandson. I had not seen him in about 3 weeks. When i got there both my grandson and the spoiled pet pomeranian were so happy to see me the yboth climbed up on me. I had my grandson one one leg and the dog on the other. everytime i stopped petting the dog she whacked me with her paw..and same for my grandson.
I think all babies give unconditional love. just like pets do..babies grow out of it...pets dont.
 pat_983
Joined: 5/23/2005
Msg: 97 (view)
 
Thoughts and advice on long distance relationships
Posted: 3/10/2006 1:22:18 PM
Funny part is when i posted this i was thinking about someone other than the person i'm actually dating now.... ..the other funny part is the person I 'm dating now is also somewhat long distance (an hour away)....it's approaching 2 months now and things could not be better. We are both busy during the week but make time to see each other every weekend ( we actually missed 2 weekends because of events that could not be changed). Even if she lived around the corner I don't think we would be seeing each other any more often due to how busy the week can get.
Guess i answered my own question..it can work out very well depending on the situation and the people involved.
 pat_983
Joined: 5/23/2005
Msg: 16 (view)
 
Ignore it all
Posted: 3/10/2006 1:12:41 PM

Learn from the past but don't live in it. It's a natural thing for someone who has had a devastating experiance in their psat to dwell there for a while. They should not be dating, they should be healing. When you get to the point where you are ready to date then you have to leave the past there and look to the future.
If you are the type pf person who is very tolerant then you may be able to help this new found friend get over but if it just keeps on being brought up and you keep getting compared with past partners then ditch the relationship and move on. I for one don't like making comparisons and i don't like people comparing me with someone else.


Crikey....ok this^^^ is pat not the other guy....
 pat_983
Joined: 5/23/2005
Msg: 28 (view)
 
signs of spring !!!
Posted: 3/9/2006 4:45:02 PM
ummm some buds are in bloom year round....
 pat_983
Joined: 5/23/2005
Msg: 25 (view)
 
Is it a horrible thing to be a member of an on-line dating site?
Posted: 3/9/2006 3:37:59 PM

oh, please....you've never met me.

Do I have to meet you to determine that you have specific tastes? by the way this is not a bad thing ..just in case you thought I was bashing you..
 pat_983
Joined: 5/23/2005
Msg: 23 (view)
 
Is it a horrible thing to be a member of an on-line dating site?
Posted: 3/9/2006 2:53:25 PM
^^^ no flaws..You just have specific tastes and needs.
 pat_983
Joined: 5/23/2005
Msg: 20 (view)
 
Is it a horrible thing to be a member of an on-line dating site?
Posted: 3/9/2006 2:47:16 PM

yes, it's a terrible, horrible, rotten thing...

and we should all be totally ashamed of ourselves!

Ur wicked....
 pat_983
Joined: 5/23/2005
Msg: 20 (view)
 
Music and Age
Posted: 3/9/2006 2:36:24 PM
Ummm proxy post
"crazy little thing called love"...Queen

C
now ya know her initial...
 pat_983
Joined: 5/23/2005
Msg: 16 (view)
 
Is it a horrible thing to be a member of an on-line dating site?
Posted: 3/9/2006 2:34:57 PM
@leeanne....my pleasure..and like I said it beats the hell out of the bar scene
 pat_983
Joined: 5/23/2005
Msg: 23 (view)
 
signs of spring !!!
Posted: 3/9/2006 2:32:42 PM
It is almost at the temperature that I can lay in the back yard and do my impression of a sun dial...
 pat_983
Joined: 5/23/2005
Msg: 14 (view)
 
Is it a horrible thing to be a member of an on-line dating site?
Posted: 3/9/2006 2:30:26 PM
Hahahaha..ok so this is posting by proxy..from someone..who for reasons we can't mention can't post right now...
Her post:
I do no think that it is wrong to be on a dating site..hell, i havbe met so many awesome people. I totally hate when someone leaves out information on their profile..whats the point? if you meet someone you like, they are gonna know where you live anyway, and really, to all the others..who cares!
Being on pof has been a wonderful experience for me. I have met some very close friends...both men and women. and i love attending the events...its my b-day on sat and ill be at yuk yuks and can hardly wait!..lol...anyway, if someone should think that being on a dating site is nerdy or whatever, then what the hell are they doing on it anyway..i dunno...just my thoughts....
 pat_983
Joined: 5/23/2005
Msg: 13 (view)
 
Is it a horrible thing to be a member of an on-line dating site?
Posted: 3/9/2006 2:28:01 PM

It's all good! If you have to worry about the things you participate in throughout your life, you would be causing yourself unnessesary stress, making yourself very unhappy. Embrace your life and your decisions.


^^^ see ..now this is a response from a mature wise woman...well said.
 
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