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 Author Thread: What kind of man/woman do you think you attract?
 ctrydancer
Joined: 5/29/2005
Msg: 61 (view)
 
What kind of man/woman do you think you attract?
Posted: 7/13/2009 4:50:28 AM
The only pattern in my mailbox is: I don't think were a match!

SARL I agree, people just don't want to make the time in their lives to meet anyone. But when I do attract someone, its someone who wants me to take care of them financially.
 ctrydancer
Joined: 5/29/2005
Msg: 8 (view)
 
HOW to travel alone
Posted: 8/17/2008 8:26:18 AM
I enjoy experiences through other people's eyes as well. It was like when the children all left home, I had to adjust. Start enjoying stuff for yourself. If you are interested enough in going somewhere, make a plan to what you want to do during the time you are there and start making time for... yourself. Find a travel partner, it doesn't have to be male.
 ctrydancer
Joined: 5/29/2005
Msg: 55 (view)
 
what are the worst cities you've driven in?
Posted: 8/17/2008 8:07:39 AM
I don't mind the traffic as much as the jersey barriers in Jacksonville, FL going to Daytona. I've even seen the scuff marks going up and over those things and dislike them when there is no where to pull off if something should happen to the car.
 ctrydancer
Joined: 5/29/2005
Msg: 34 (view)
 
So tired of the one date...then what??
Posted: 8/17/2008 7:56:06 AM
I read the entire thread and it appears to me it has to be "instantaneous" or else. Gee, [/however Im not interested etc etc etc, you can always block them as soon as you send the email/] if this was done, how is the relationship to form? You get to know someone and develop a friendship through several meetings. Its like putting a child in daycare and expect them to like it the first time. This internet dating thing is like fast food to a restaurant. It doesn't replace the atmosphere, quality, and most importantly time.
 ctrydancer
Joined: 5/29/2005
Msg: 33 (view)
 
So tired of the one date...then what??
Posted: 8/17/2008 7:42:17 AM
Or how about...are you being judged even before the first date turns out?
 ctrydancer
Joined: 5/29/2005
Msg: 6 (view)
 
Loneliness
Posted: 8/17/2008 7:16:02 AM
[I long to not come home to a empty house to be greeted by a smiling face and a warm hug someone that I can talk to about my day]/
I believe its but a preparation for something greater in the future. It's but only a few seconds to wait for the happiness in the rest of our lives. I feel it too. I feel I've been thrown away and was robbed by my youth. Who would want this older person now? I miss the cuddling and watching tv, sleeping intertwined, the looking deep into the eyes of that special someone. Sharing glances from across the room. You sound like a very romantic person. Just believe in your heart that someone is suppose to fill the void.
 Ctrydancer
Joined: 5/29/2005
Msg: 51 (view)
 
Charlotte area, anyone
Posted: 6/23/2008 10:16:43 PM
Hi Lisa...thought you left after the Longbranch. Glad to see you are still around. I like Cayote Joes, and there is Whiskey River, and Buck Wild. All Country though. (Dee)
 Ctrydancer
Joined: 5/29/2005
Msg: 37 (view)
 
After meeting someone, what are some good questions to ask?
Posted: 6/17/2008 8:11:51 AM
thanks for the good advice, but for those moments when there is silence, it can be awkward.
 Ctrydancer
Joined: 5/29/2005
Msg: 1 (view)
 
After meeting someone, what are some good questions to ask?
Posted: 6/4/2008 4:36:44 PM
After meeting with your date, what are some good questions to ask?
Which are you better at, listening or speaking?
What do you do when there is silence in a conversation?
How do you feel about cussing and strong language?
How do you communicate when you are upset, if you do at all?
How important is eye contact when speaking to another person?
If something is bothering you, how long will it take you to bring it up?
 ctrydancer
Joined: 5/29/2005
Msg: 2 (view)
 
Charlotte Anyone? ~~~~~~~~
Posted: 3/8/2008 12:02:31 PM
On Wednesday evening I go to Cayote Joe's its free for women. Want to start an evening there?
 Ctrydancer
Joined: 5/29/2005
Msg: 31 (view)
 
Feb 28~POF Linedance lessons Get Together @ LongbranchSaloon in Raleigh
Posted: 2/24/2008 3:36:13 PM
I can't wait. They showed me one dance I hadn't done in ages. It was nice meeting all the gals and guys. I can't wait to make many more new friends.
 Ctrydancer
Joined: 5/29/2005
Msg: 2 (view)
 
Feb 28~POF Linedance lessons Get Together @ LongbranchSaloon in Raleigh
Posted: 2/21/2008 3:54:50 PM
I know a few dances if anyone is interested in learning. Looking for a dance partner myself. I'll go to Raleigh.
 Ctrydancer
Joined: 5/29/2005
Msg: 15 (view)
 
March 8~Band SuperGrit @ New South Country Music Club in LaGrange/Kinston 7pm
Posted: 2/16/2008 8:38:37 AM
Hey Bill,,,you have a block to distance and I can't say thank you for such wonderful conversation yesterday. I had fun.
 ctrydancer
Joined: 5/29/2005
Msg: 322 (view)
 
Our POF LongbranchSaloon Christmas Get Together~~Dec 14~8pm-2am
Posted: 12/11/2007 7:15:15 PM
Can't wait till Friday....I'll be there. I go dancing in Charlotte and rarely to Raleigh. I too am getting excited.
 ctrydancer
Joined: 5/29/2005
Msg: 289 (view)
 
Our POF LongbranchSaloon Christmas Get Together~~Dec 14~8pm-2am
Posted: 12/9/2007 7:06:01 PM
anyone like to dance country?
 ctrydancer
Joined: 5/29/2005
Msg: 72 (view)
 
How did you finally....let go?
Posted: 12/3/2006 9:48:06 PM
Mozie....25 years was a lot of time to spend with someone. And just when I think everything is ok...was recently told that he's proposed to her. Kinda had hurt feelings.

I can deal with knowing I wasn't the one cheating. I now realize it was all about money. Was it delusional? Sometime I think so. There were times when I felt he wanted a mother and didn't treat me as a wife. He stopped making time for me and said he didn't know anything about me anymore. In the end, he became hateful to relieve himself of the guilt.

He did me a favor by leaving. Regrets now? He should of done it sooner. As I see it, they waited about a year. Having no income he stayed with me so he could start up his business. I put myself through college, worked two jobs, and I think he was uncomfortable with the fact I was doing something to better myself. I realize the gap with social, emotional, educational, just grew us further apart. I think the morals of committment no matter what... and the wanting to keep my vows makes this process of letting go difficult.
 ctrydancer
Joined: 5/29/2005
Msg: 23 (view)
 
Christmas Traditions w/kids suggestions
Posted: 11/30/2006 8:15:44 PM
Have to have a pork pie (tortiere) why? I dunno...we always had one growing up. Going out at night looking for christmas lights was always fun.
 CTRYDANCER
Joined: 5/29/2005
Msg: 1 (view)
 
Care to get together for New Years in NC?
Posted: 11/29/2006 3:26:00 PM
So...should we plan on a New Years Plenty of Fish get together somewhere near Charlotte? Where is there a meal and some music? I don't want to be stuck home alone.

Dee
 ctrydancer
Joined: 5/29/2005
Msg: 18 (view)
 
Christmas Traditions w/kids suggestions
Posted: 11/28/2006 3:17:13 PM
The end of Thanksgiving, I would take out construction paper and then make a chain link with the number of links of days left till christmas; and each night the children would remove one link until it was christmas. I had the link attached to a cardboard picture and hung it in a doorway. It was fun watching the chain shrink till Christmas.
 ctrydancer
Joined: 5/29/2005
Msg: 53 (view)
 
Sooo ... the ex is getting remarried ... how do you feel?
Posted: 11/27/2006 7:56:56 PM
From the day she announced she wanted him after being dumped by her boyfriend. She ruined our 25 year marriage and he was beguiled. I hear tonight they made plans to get married. The best thing I ever did to get even with him is to let him have her. What comes around, goes around.
 ctrydancer
Joined: 5/29/2005
Msg: 12 (view)
 
New Rules For 2007..George Carlin
Posted: 11/27/2006 3:47:14 PM
So what would happen if Lowes home improvement and Lowes foods merge?

sink' 0 de mayo
 ctrydancer
Joined: 5/29/2005
Msg: 29 (view)
 
Holiday Blues...
Posted: 11/26/2006 6:21:28 PM
Can you believe a whole year has passed by? I spent Thanksgiving with my mom. My sister came to decorate my house for Christmas as I wasn't even going to have one this year. So now, I look at the tree and think about past Christmas'.
 ctrydancer
Joined: 5/29/2005
Msg: 56 (view)
 
How did you finally....let go?
Posted: 11/26/2006 6:02:25 PM
Songs triggers memories....Holidays are the hardest. I keep busy, but it invades my thoughts
 ctrydancer
Joined: 5/29/2005
Msg: 185 (view)
 
can you trust some one once they cheat?
Posted: 11/18/2006 7:32:25 AM
My ex had the audacity to ask for three months to go dating...I gave him a lifetime.
 ctrydancer
Joined: 5/29/2005
Msg: 167 (view)
 
Can you sleep when you are cuddling?
Posted: 10/14/2006 5:18:19 PM
microfiber blankets and sleeping in the nude...yup yup....Love to sleep hearing the breathing going in and out and legs all tangled up together. I like skin to skin contact. Cuddling up at night was peaceful, a kiss on the forehead, nose to nose kissing. With no one there now, I have a body pillow for my back and a ticking alarm clock on my night stand. Yeah, I also have an electric blanket for cool nights on low.
 ctrydancer
Joined: 5/29/2005
Msg: 34 (view)
 
To The Women Stating That They Are Affectionate,But Are They Really?
Posted: 10/14/2006 5:05:00 PM
So you want romantic, affectionate women? ..youd get all that and more in most new relationships. In most marriages it fizzles out because it was taken for granted. Many men and women forget that a healthy sex life takes work. Most divorces are because one party stopped doing their part. I for one, enjoy the physical touch and skin to skin contact, often. But I again will not have sex with someone new for the sake of getting off. Through child bearing, I've associated love and emotions with intimacy. The lust piece also has to be there and to be comfortable where the desire is so intense and not shared with a stranger. Does that make sense?
 ctrydancer
Joined: 5/29/2005
Msg: 301 (view)
 
Ever feel like your going to be alone forever?
Posted: 10/14/2006 2:18:58 PM
Message 13...I'm not looking for a relationship - besides getting a dance partner and occassional someone who enjoys doing the same things I do. But i too don't like this being alone thing. I've been on this site since 2005 and I think I've actually met three people in person. Most decided that I'm not "their type" by picture and the few words I've written.

i went dancing alone last night and I enjoy meeting new people. And the one that sticks out is that they said they are not looking for relationship...oh give me a break, as all I wanted was a dance and not a lifetime of committment.
 ctrydancer
Joined: 5/29/2005
Msg: 25 (view)
 
Older daters
Posted: 10/10/2006 3:13:36 PM
waldo...you weren't talking about me!
 ctrydancer
Joined: 5/29/2005
Msg: 15 (view)
 
Do you think it is wrong to have your adult child in court??
Posted: 10/8/2006 5:11:11 PM
Hi all...well this hurt is another notch as to why I should dispise my ex. In 25 years, he knew me enough to know which button to push and when. Using our children is terrible and immature. I believe in Karma. May he be happy with his girlfriend and have our three children between them at all times.
 ctrydancer
Joined: 5/29/2005
Msg: 12 (view)
 
To The Women Stating That They Are Affectionate,But Are They Really?
Posted: 10/8/2006 4:51:58 PM
Oh my!!! I find myself as extremely romantic and affectionate but NOT on first/second dates. I need to feel comfortable, secure/safe, and not pawed over. Any talk of sex on a first date is a turn off. As others said on this string, it takes a while to develop a healthy relationship and you can't expect intimacy without this emotional piece.
 ctrydancer
Joined: 5/29/2005
Msg: 7 (view)
 
Older daters
Posted: 10/8/2006 12:38:13 PM
I think you are right. Set in their ways, it would be nice to find someone else who would like to share the same interests. For me, just to be nice to someone else means alot. Having a wide variety of activities to share with others just means you don't just sit around brooding all day.

So far, many of my contacts been lude and I believe that what you do comes around. Thanks for your words, keep in touch.
 ctrydancer
Joined: 5/29/2005
Msg: 52 (view)
 
How did you finally....let go?
Posted: 10/8/2006 12:02:35 PM
thank you all for your insight. I've started my life over in some distant land. May you all find peace!
 ctrydancer
Joined: 5/29/2005
Msg: 1 (view)
 
Older daters
Posted: 10/8/2006 11:35:29 AM
I'm not finding any luck meeting older folks on this site. Seems everyone here is happy and would rather be alone than wanting someone in their lives. Many complain about being alone and then fail to reply to women that write first. What gives?
 ctrydancer
Joined: 5/29/2005
Msg: 5 (view)
 
rebound relationships yes or no
Posted: 8/27/2006 6:03:39 PM
YES...My sentiments exactly...I am a social person. To deny oneself someone because they are of the opposite sex for a period of time to me is isolation..I enjoy the sharing activities and good conversation. I like my quality time. But I don't like being alone. I'm enjoying things and doing things I haven't done in a while. Being around others helps me from becoming depressed. If you don't want it to be romantically involved, than you need to communicate that.
 ctrydancer
Joined: 5/29/2005
Msg: 7 (view)
 
Special education
Posted: 8/23/2006 11:44:58 PM
I am sorry to hear about your son. Thats awful. Have they controlled the seizures and convulsions?

If you are unhappy with placements, maybe the Parent Information Center in your area will assist you with an advocate for "Least Restrictive Placement" issues. Your IEP's goals dictate the placement. (Individual Education Plan)

Were not talking about the same disorder. Schools do no ship children out of district with attention deficits or for hyperactivity. It cost unsurmountable money to have out of district placements. Parents actually have to strongly advocate for schools to give up money to place their child in a specialized program.
 ctrydancer
Joined: 5/29/2005
Msg: 18 (view)
 
Once a cheater, always a cheater
Posted: 8/23/2006 11:31:33 PM
Well dear....it's still adultry. Relationships work if two people work at it. I was prepared for a lifetime of commitment. Religiously, my vows meant something to me. As they would say in school, I have zero tolerance.... for infidelity.

You can't force another person to have morals or values. She is a single mom, found herself someone who has the ability to supplement her part-time job and is able to support her and her young children. Our children are grown and been on their own for a while now. Wanting someone younger cause he's getting older is not an excuse.
 ctrydancer
Joined: 5/29/2005
Msg: 65 (view)
 
I'm so hurt I can't sleep
Posted: 8/23/2006 10:41:44 PM
Gawshhhh...I was married longer than you were born...guess I can whine a bit. Yes, this is an opportunity to start over. I look forward to being happy being single. But I still wake up, and it's 2 am. It just takes some use to being in an empty nest. Kids grown and have their own lives now.
 ctrydancer
Joined: 5/29/2005
Msg: 11 (view)
 
Once a cheater, always a cheater
Posted: 8/22/2006 12:14:26 AM
well I can empathize with you!...the best thing I ever did was give my EX husband to the homewrecker and I hope he has a happy life. I served my unfaithful one with a divorce and we were 25 years together. I didn't suspect anything even until the day I got the news he wanted three months to date. Saying he wanted "more exciting". Claiming he didn't date much before we met. Guess younger won't like it when she finds out he can't manage money, quits THIS job, or the teeth and hearing aids needs replacing. What comes around goes around. I hear he's not as happy as he thought he was going to be.
 ctrydancer
Joined: 5/29/2005
Msg: 461 (view)
 
Can men and women be friends without sex?
Posted: 8/14/2006 2:29:45 PM
Without sex?...I have many male friends and acquaintances that I don't have sex with. Just people I bump into, out dancing, out in public, professionally in the community, in school, co-workers. My friend's boyfriends or husbands. Thats what impulse control is all about....lol
 ctrydancer
Joined: 5/29/2005
Msg: 41 (view)
 
How did you finally....let go?
Posted: 8/14/2006 2:23:25 PM
Jarbarian...hi again...you had that message about "letting go" and found it thought provoking.

I go dancing often and go walking. I've just been offered a wonderful job and that will take up alot of my time doing lesson plans and I just can't wait to start teaching again. I've been in this rut for tooooo long. I'm planning on a course at the community college. I may even teach there. I have started to focus on the future and less on the past. Thanks for replying.

Dee
 ctrydancer
Joined: 5/29/2005
Msg: 88 (view)
 
23 Years and I get thrown away!
Posted: 8/14/2006 2:18:39 PM
I read somewhere that we gave them everything they need to be independent. Now its time to let them teach their own children. I give my prayers that they remain safe every night and wish them happiness. Thats all we can do. They are not lost...just misdirected. Keep praying and they will be back in our lives...just believe.
 ctrydancer
Joined: 5/29/2005
Msg: 39 (view)
 
How did you finally....let go?
Posted: 8/14/2006 2:12:04 PM
Another 2 weeks have slipped by. Being in limbo with no future or plans thats what I was experiencing as loneliness. Its a void. I had suddenly lost all future plans with my mate. Missing the companionship, the talking, the cuddling up in bed. Yes..I recommended I needed to stay busy. Take a course, go dancing, exercise and just begin to do things that make myself happy. I will stay focused on the future and try to stop dwelling on the past as I can't change anything. Still....the memories get triggered by the stupidest things. Now its to work on these and change my response to them. This takes alot of energy and not an easy task to do.
 ctrydancer
Joined: 5/29/2005
Msg: 81 (view)
 
23 Years and I get thrown away!
Posted: 8/14/2006 1:52:43 PM
You make sense...Maggie is lucky to find people on here that boost self-esteem instead of tearing them down.
 ctrydancer
Joined: 5/29/2005
Msg: 40 (view)
 
Things that affect your mood.
Posted: 8/14/2006 1:15:25 PM
Going for a drive out in the country with the windows down...thats a mood changer for me. I like to listen to music. Being around positive people and going to a comedy. Being around animals (cats, dogs, birds), usually they do something to make me laugh. Going out in the sun is an energizer. Going to the ocean and listening to the waves. I just read: Eat a banana...they say the chemical in it is something like taking prozak.
 ctrydancer
Joined: 5/29/2005
Msg: 75 (view)
 
23 Years and I get thrown away!
Posted: 8/14/2006 12:47:54 PM
Not in ALL cases!.....
that its take 2 to tango
Being unfaithful isn't always a wife neglecting her husband. That cheater is solely responsible. My ex decided he wanted to date to "experience" what he felt he never had. I was his first marriage. Wanted me to give him three months to play after 25 years. I don't think so...and I'm laughing now because the best punishment was letting her have him. I thought my life ended, it didn't. At my age, I'm pretty happy not having to ever support anyone else but me. This is the first time I can say the only one I need to take care of is me.

Guess the only way you feel both parties are to blame is if two people just stopped working on the relationship. If you were the one responsible for the breakdown and then want the other to relieve you, you can justify blaming the other.
 ctrydancer
Joined: 5/29/2005
Msg: 33 (view)
 
Things that affect your mood.
Posted: 8/10/2006 12:10:18 AM
Guess nothing that a bag of dark chocolate M&M's can't cure....guess I'm happier now that I'm not crying. Oh well ces't la vie!
 ctrydancer
Joined: 5/29/2005
Msg: 9 (view)
 
reaching out in the night
Posted: 8/1/2006 11:24:13 AM
Always looking to make new friends.
 ctrydancer
Joined: 5/29/2005
Msg: 41 (view)
 
Any North Carolina people want to take a class?
Posted: 8/1/2006 11:09:20 AM
TARA...your profile matches mine....I would love to get this course going. Mitchell College has a class registration is this month...your restrictions on age won't let me e-mail you.
 ctrydancer
Joined: 5/29/2005
Msg: 7 (view)
 
reaching out in the night
Posted: 8/1/2006 6:30:17 AM
Hello...doing any better? I expect things should smooth out eventually and you can restore some saneness into your life. I had been alone at an early age also with two small children. Find things that make you happy and if at night when all is quiet...write
 ctrydancer
Joined: 5/29/2005
Msg: 70 (view)
 
23 Years and I get thrown away!
Posted: 8/1/2006 6:21:32 AM
Haven't heard from you for a while...hope you are feeling better. Know that many of us have been there and know what you are going through. That in itself made me feel better to have others say it gets better, and theres hope for a better life. Take it as a learning experience and apply what you've learned. What is it that you want for the future? Write yourself a list.
 
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