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 Author Thread: Why do you guys do it?
 passionfly
Joined: 6/19/2005
Msg: 22 (view)
 
Why do you guys do it?
Posted: 1/11/2007 10:40:06 PM
I was on webcam a few times with different woman and they asked me to show them my penis after about 10 minutes of chatting. I don't use my webcam anymore now. Why in the world would I give some chick a free show? I need crisp hard currency before I give that sort of show!
 passionfly
Joined: 6/19/2005
Msg: 35 (view)
 
How about some honesty
Posted: 1/11/2007 5:51:41 PM

Because...

Whenever a guy says, "hey, it's not working out" you, the girl, then wants an explanation.

Guy gives an explanation.

Then you, the girl, suddenly feel an overwhelming desire for this guy. Instead of hearing what is being said, you take it as an opportunity to change things. So, you do something, say something, whatever, that will fix it.

When you do this, you've done several "bad" things. First, you've made it soooo much more difficult for the guy to 'get r done'. If you would just say, "yeah, I hear ya. Nice knowing you" you'd get your honesty. Oh no, that would be too simple. Now the guy not only has to TELL you, he has to tell you AND argue with you about it... or... he has to acquiesce and stay with you. He'll do this for the sex (esp. since you're now giving him an out...) but mostly because he doesn't like hurting your feelings....

Now, what really sux is when you go about PAINSTAKINGLY ignoring someone for several weeks and they still contact you. To the veterans... that's just like bear bating.... :)


daaaang! this is so so true, very well put! I broke up with my ex a while back and she did everything in her power to change my mind knowing full well it would never work between her and I. Instead of "if you love him, set him free" kind of attitude she tried to insist and demand we be together. This is so very unattractive.
 passionfly
Joined: 6/19/2005
Msg: 22 (view)
 
Aparently missing all the signals
Posted: 1/11/2007 5:44:40 PM

also you have to remember i get this alot when i am out. girls see a guy and they just use him for attention then blow him off at the last minute. signals are good but sometimes the girls are just as bad as the guys.

this is one of the reasons i joined this site, cutes out the middle crap because i dont like getting played.


you can get played on internet dating sites just as easily as in the real world. Don't let the difference fool ya.
 passionfly
Joined: 6/19/2005
Msg: 80 (view)
 
HUGS - Can a man spend the night and just hug?
Posted: 1/11/2007 5:40:01 PM

Out of curiousity:

Where does one find guys that just like to hug and cuddle all night?

Seeing as I only find guys that like to have sex within the first hour of a date...where do you zero expectation guys hang out? Guys that don't expect sex, hmmm?


What a silly question, we are right here. Your just assuming the worst of us or are too picky to give certain men a chance based on your assumptions. The guys you are looking for are EVERYWHERE!

If a guy seems to be wanting you for sex then he is hard up or testing you to see if you truly are the kind of girl you say you are.
 passionfly
Joined: 6/19/2005
Msg: 35 (view)
 
Examples of Chemistry that make your heart melt!
Posted: 1/11/2007 5:33:13 PM
what a wonderful thread, thanks for starting it

TennesseStacy is dead on in her post! This quote is so true:



Listening w/o denegrating a woman's emotions by making her try to explain them in a logical fashion is probably the hardest thing on earth for a man to do.


It is the hardest thing we as men do, we always try and fix the problem and not just listen and understand. Its amazing what you can learn from women if you just listen. Big kudos!
 passionfly
Joined: 6/19/2005
Msg: 73 (view)
 
HUGS - Can a man spend the night and just hug?
Posted: 1/9/2007 9:39:17 PM
OP, your question depends on whether a woman is teasing a guy knowingly offering her body next to him, knowing he wants you but not giving it up or you both are just comfortable with holdin each other.

If a girl puts on sexy clothing and asks me to lay in bed next to her and rubs herself into me but stops me from going further I tell her get a dang cat cause I'm not built that way!
 passionfly
Joined: 6/19/2005
Msg: 18 (view)
 
how do men determine who they date and who they have sex with
Posted: 1/9/2007 9:19:13 PM

When a man decides to date you..he automatically wants to sleep with you, so that's a given.


what a bunch of cr ap! I'm not like that! Just because I'm a man does not automatically make me want to sleep with you if we date. I need to figure out if your even worth being with in the first place. That is what a date consists of, getting to know one another.

How much of an ego do you have to assume just cause a guy asks you out on a date he wants you so bad as to want you for sex. You may not even be physically attractive to him but he likes your personality.

Some women are so full of themselves, blech.
 passionfly
Joined: 6/19/2005
Msg: 25 (view)
 
Why is it?
Posted: 1/9/2007 6:31:31 PM

Who says that women don't have trouble finding a date too? And who the hell says that if you're attractive that means dating is way easier? Yeah you might get asked out often...but finding a decent guy/gal who isn't just interested in your looks? That isn't exactly a piece of cake.


well, you don't have the looks so that shouldn't be too hard for ya
 passionfly
Joined: 6/19/2005
Msg: 19 (view)
 
Aparently missing all the signals
Posted: 1/9/2007 6:07:54 PM
women won't tell you how to seduce them its just not going to happen, you can forget it guys. A woman sends out signals and she believes are visible and if you aren't keen to them you will fail to create attraction. If any guy thinks a woman will go out of her way to verbally TELL YOU how to seduce her you will be waiting a long time for that to ever happen. Women who are bold and up front are extremely rare. Just BE the man and learn the signals and everything will be work out...

The cool thing is the better your social skills are the easier it is to pick up on those signals.
 passionfly
Joined: 6/19/2005
Msg: 39 (view)
 
The question that has been on my mind all these years...
Posted: 1/9/2007 5:45:21 PM
women go together to bathrooms because they are connivin, personal sh!t revealin, can't keep a secret if their life depended on it, wanna share your penis size with complete strangers biyotches....there I said it, whacha gonna do about it?
 passionfly
Joined: 6/19/2005
Msg: 14 (view)
 
Why the brush off?
Posted: 1/9/2007 5:35:14 PM

A friend of mine introduced me to a friend of hers one night at a club. We hit it off, she was rubbing my shoulders, dancing slow with me, sitting on my lap. The next night we all went out again. Again, we pretty much picked where we left off. Not really making out but there was a definite mutual attraction. Third night, I took her out for her birthday, nice quiet restaurant, drinks. Wherever she wanted to go. End of the night kiss at her door. Mind you, we had been kissing alot since the first night. I was/am a gentleman and don't jumpright into the sack. So the next day I call and she says she was going out with her "cousin" and she had told me that. She hadn't. Anyway, she went out of town for a few days, wouldn't return my calls to her cell. Wouldn't return my messages on the home phone either. Question; is she just a player or was there possibly some other reason for this behavior?


she is distancing herself from you because your coming across as too needy/clingy and its turning her off, thats why she is doing it. Give her the gift of missing you as much as you miss her...
 passionfly
Joined: 6/19/2005
Msg: 24 (view)
 
I started feeling something for a friend and kissed him...
Posted: 1/9/2007 3:53:49 PM
first off all...your a co ck tease and you know it. You WANT to get a guy so horney for you in that it gives you a sense of power over him. You won't give him any since this will lessen your power and at that point then HE has the power in a realtionship because now you want him as much as he wants you. While its only a one way road where you keep him at distance and he wants you badly you feel like your in control. But your not, your going to loose him because you are "an adult woman with really big breasts that I use and wield as weapons". But how much "adult" are you by acting like this?

Your just pathetic how you play with someones emotions for your own benefit. How much of a caring bone in your body do you have to please a guy who is clearly interested in you and wants you?

Your speaking about being taken advantage of while you take advantage of a guy by intentionally sexually turning him on and then belitting him because he had the audacity to actually orgasm from the situation you BOTH put each other into by making out. Did someone FORCE you to kiss him or get him sexually charged or did you use your breasts to intentionally provoke this sort of behavior? You do USE your breasts as weapons as you say after all.

Women who have faced a lack of power in their lives, use sex or their bodies as weapons to compensate and gain some of that power back. Your a real piece of work.
 passionfly
Joined: 6/19/2005
Msg: 37 (view)
 
Complete Sexaholic
Posted: 1/9/2007 3:34:44 PM
So what you are saying to us is that you need to USE a man for his appendage and not truly discover if he has more to offer beyond just sex? You basically use men for sex and dont care about what else they have to offer. Isn't this the same thing women have been complaining about men doing to them for centuries?

Is acting like so many shallow men act the nobelist aspiration you have in your own womanhood?

Your not promiscuous yet you want sex all the time. Maybe you should be promiscuous otherwise the two frames of mind dont correlate.

I bet when the guys that want sex send you emails for sex you disqualify them as ONLY wanting you for sex too, lol
 passionfly
Joined: 6/19/2005
Msg: 33 (view)
 
How come a guy can seem cool and be a dork in person?
Posted: 1/9/2007 3:06:29 PM
Maybe your too much of a jaded individual and are so picky with your choices the REAL gems of men that come across your life aren't given a chance to be themselves. If you act like you have been harmed, abused, used for sex, not had love in your life, always ****ing about men then why the heck are the REAL MEN going to want to spend time with a complainer?

There are good men out here, I am one of them, but honestly, we aren't here to be your phychiatrists and help you overcome your inability to see past the BS you have been dealt with in life. We all have problems but women are EXTREMELY EXTREMELY picky. Fine be picky but you will have no excuse whatsoever if the right guy comes along and you disqualify him because he had dirty fingernails or he said something you didnt approve of...

Far be it for a woman to be genuine and take a chance on a guy she finds interesting and build something together with him. She will find fault and disect every single stupid nuance of his character to the point where in her own mind he isnt even the same person as he is in the REAL world. NO MAN is perfect, not a single guy ever out there. EVERY single guy, from mr right to mr right now is flawed in some form or sense and this is why we are human beings we all make mistakes but to hold this against someone and disqualify them as a person because they didn't say the EXACT correct thing at the exact correct time YOU wanted it said is wrong!

STOP rationalizing, overanalyzing or misinterpreting things that are not there, wear a smile on your face, have an outlook that is positive instead of negative about our gender and you will see how fast the right guy comes along. Heck, I may be that right guy for all you know. But why in the world would I want to write to a jaded, complaining, men suck kind of person?

Gee, god FORBID a man would show you affection only to have it irritate you. God forbid a man finds you interesting enough to actually want to hold your hand. Maybe you feel your hair will get all mussed up or lipstick will get all smudged if you actually kiss, heaven forbid that happens!!! Cause you know Mr. Right would NEVER EVER want to hold your hand or try and kiss you. Only the perverts do that, right? Puuuleese, get a real problem will ya.......
 passionfly
Joined: 6/19/2005
Msg: 65 (view)
 
My Husband is Ok with my boyfriend ... thoughts?
Posted: 1/9/2007 2:43:55 PM
Isn't it refreshing to have a husband in your life who is that open-minded and that confident in your marriage. Quite a difference from the clingy, needy, "you are my property after we are married" type of guy, huh?

Its only weird if you do not understand this sort of behavior. NO ONE, not even in marriage has the right to control someone like they are their property. We stay with the people we love becuase we CHOOSE to be with them. Out of all the choices we choose this particular person. Love is about having the courage to express it without boundaries or demand the other person recipricate. You show love for them, for their existence in your life but to chain them down with emotional bindings is just a recipie for eventual disaster.

Love can NEVER be kept with demands
Love can NEVER be bartered
Love can NEVER be shackled
Love can NEVER be bought or sold

Love breaks all barriers and transcends all misfortunes.

Love is the ultimate freedom of expression we as human beings have if done in its purest form. We all have the right to love whomever we choose regardless of their reciprication.

Sounds to me like your husband got the love part correct in your marriage. Now the question is, what is your choice now that he has given you this much freedom? Will you show this love back or squander it?
 passionfly
Joined: 6/19/2005
Msg: 46 (view)
 
The unwritten law strictly between men
Posted: 1/9/2007 2:21:00 PM
lol, as if though being a hunk to women is any sort of a sign of having a large member. In the gym locker room, the guys with the biggest buff bodies have the smallest d!cks. And if I ever catch a guy looking I almost always assume he's gay. Big hunks as you put it overcompensate their lack of a member by buildin up their bodies. I've seen it in the gym locker room and I laugh secretly inside, lol

Sometimes God is just great at evening out the odds...
 passionfly
Joined: 6/19/2005
Msg: 37 (view)
 
Advice for dealing with stalkers
Posted: 1/4/2007 10:56:04 PM
mominatrix, what a close-minded person. First off I was not attacking the OP. Read that again please.

If I yell the N word in Harlem, guess what, I get a beatdown FAST! Action - Reaction. People aren't supposed to hurt others because of just words, right? But it happens, each and every day.

If she acts stupid, portrays herself as a victim, says she IS dumb in her profile she will attract men who are seeking this type of woman PERIOD. The action SHE can control (because we have yet to hear from THE stalker in this thread) is to not act, behave or send out vibes that she is dumb, victimish or other blatant idiosyncrosies that tend to attract lunatics. Now where in the heck did you read that as an attack on her? Its a call to action for her to change her modus operadi for lack of a better word and and start sending out better wording to start to attract a better quality of individual.

If a woman walks with tight clothing late at night in a bad neighborhood over and over and over again and has the audacity to say why are these people harassing me time and again... well no crap! Its your own lack of RESPONSIBILITY to correctly guage the situation and act APPROPRIATELY. It is her responsibility to have common sense and not put herself into a bad situation if it has been a pattern of doing the same thing over and over and over again. I mean since 1980 for crying out loud. How many decades does it take to try something different if she does the same thing (ie act dumb, god knows what she says in IM or or on the phone) and is perpetually meeting with stalkers. A woman does not have the right to be harrassed but it happens its how the REAL WORLD is. Its not blame its about RESPONSIBILITY. If more people would just close that voice in them to lash out and shut up and just listen for a second and say to themselves what can I do different in a situation like this to mitigate it from happeneing again. You can't guarantee it from happeneing but you sure as hell can lessen the chances!

Did you ever wonder why ALL cars come with standard locks on their doors? Why is this not an accessory? Cause the manufacturer knows there are bad people out there and they will want to steal your car or the crap in it! If there was no locks on any cars the amount of lawsuits would be astronomical from car theft and burglaries. Not to mention a lot of pissed off car owners. But the manufacturer of the car takes the RESPONSIBILITY to provide locks on ALL cars they make. They don't have to. You dont NEED a lock on your car door to make the darn thing run now do ya?

Might I add other WOMEN said the same thing about this same issue I am referring to in this same thread. Why did you not attack them with your "sarcasm"? Is it because I am a man and of course you assume I know nothing about pressing charges for being stalked myself?

Here is the deal, if you do not know who the stalker is you can NOT control THEM but you CAN control your own actions to mitigate the potential of harm done unto you. She wrote the thread, I am replying to her, not to you or your litany of absurd, legalese.

...now go have a coke and a smile and CHILL sheesh
 passionfly
Joined: 6/19/2005
Msg: 7 (view)
 
Rotten Ronnie or Betty Crocker?
Posted: 1/4/2007 12:18:29 AM
have you offered to do the dishes if he cooks? its only fair...cause if I had to do the dishes and cook she would be going hungry after a while...lol
 passionfly
Joined: 6/19/2005
Msg: 25 (view)
 
Advice for dealing with stalkers
Posted: 1/4/2007 12:14:35 AM

ChosenLady, I don't give a rat's butt what Livvy's profile says, no one deserves to be stalked. If you say no, it means not, regardless of situation or gender.


Your right no one deserves to be stalked but a woman who walks alone on dark streets in bad neighborhoods in tight clothing is asking for trouble. The OP is doing just that in a more subliminal way perhaps unbeknownst to her even. She is a walking victim and its time she snapped out of her reality that has made her a stalking victim since the 1980's and start taking RESPONSIBILITY for what SHE can control. HER actions.

Stupid is as stupid does, and I'm not calling her stupid...no wait I am...well...she said it first

Do you get it?
 passionfly
Joined: 6/19/2005
Msg: 13 (view)
 
a yes or a no
Posted: 1/4/2007 12:00:13 AM
finally a cool thread...I've seen oodles of profiles and some things I can tell you that will turn off men incredibly fast to a woman's profile is:

1) She puts out the strong independant "I don't need you" vibe. I have to agree this is my number one dislike. If you don't need a man or want one then why the heck are you here? Its ok if you don't want a man or have a good reason but if your profile is seething with "men are stupid" or "don't ask me for webcam" or is already laced with "I'm very very jaded on men so you better do something to impress me" which leads me to...

2) "make me laugh" type of profile. Great so now I'm supposed to be some sort of trick pony for her amusement now is that it? I have nothing better to do with my time then to hook up with some girl and amuse her all evening. These type of girls will sit quiet the whole evening and expect you to take on the persona of a dentist to pull any sort of conversation out of her. puuuuleeeeese Women like this are very bored with everything which of course translates into SHE is very boring. Bored people are boring, there is no two ways about it. Go eat your salad and leave me to my active fun life. I'll have better conversation with my cat.

3) tons of pictures of her drinking with her friends in bars type of profile. So now I'm at work and the girl I meet on pof is out in bars hanging out with strange guys doing god knows what. Oh yeah, give me some of THAT drama!

4) tons of pictures in many exotic places type of profile or describes her last year like she traveled to 26 different countries and is ALWAYS on the go. So exactly where do I fit into this hectic schedule? And if I can't make it to go with her, she'll what? take another guy with her? sweet!....not!

5) Puts out the slut vibe by talking about sex in her profile. Women like this is complete time wasters. They lure 200 emails from dopey guys per day with offers of something sexual and based on some random alignment of the planets pick one and the rest are wondering if their email was even read. You can't have "I like a lot of sex" and "I like to take walks on the beach" in the same profile. It just doesn't mesh. Usually this is accompanied by lots of grotuatess boob and azz shots.

6) All the world needs to lick my heels type of profile. Usually submitted by immature ladies in their teens that have so much low self-esteem they need to overcompensate by making sure a) everyone needs to be aware she is a princess b) you need to walk on water to deserve her attention and c) if she deems you worthy of sharing the same air as she, she will reply. These type of girls are just pathetic.

7) I hate men for all the wrong they have done to me type of profile. They use intelligent wording but just underneath the surface you can smell the loathing they have of men who have dumped them, ignored them, made fun of them in 5th grade, etc. and carry so much darn baggage it would take an army of porters to carry it all. They expose their hate of the past that men have done to them IN THEIR PROFILE! Gee, where do i sign up for this pain train!

8) I am female, i am breathing here are 2 words now let me pick you type of profile. This type of profile is a complete waste of time. Its usually accompanied by a single pic of her in a very very tight outfit to lure unsuspecting horndogs and her profile literally has like 2-4 words in it. Maybe she didn't even graduate from secondary school because of all the fun she was having without you!!! Complete time wasters and their profile needs to be banned on sight. A minimum of 6 sentences should be mandatory or you can't post period. If your too lazy to write a few sentences I'm too lazy to even bother with you. Along this line falls the "gee, i dont know, just write me and I'll tell you about me" OMG! thats the point write it now so we have something to talk about! You did go to school and learn how to write, correct?

9) Verbose, verbose, verbose. Her profile is so long and drawn out you feel like you have already dated, engaged, married and divorced her in the span it took you to read the profile. I goof on these they are so absurd. The wonderful thing about meeting someone new is you know just enough about them to start a good conversation and and you learn about them as dates progress and you hang out more. If you know their whole life history, then where is the mystery. They slow gentle unfolding process of meeting someone and getting to know them is the real deal. I don't want to know your entire lifes history. This isn't a blog!

10) The female logical lister type of profile. When done sparingly is effective but if their whole profile is some logical list of likes and dislikes its mindnumbing. Women are emotional not logical beings. Men are the logical ones. Stop pretending your a man and stop making a shopping list of who you are. Logical lists for women just is not an attractive quality. It reminds us of what guys do - make lists of crap we always forget to think or do! We aren't looking for men, we are looking for women. When we get a list it better be for the groceries we have to pick up once in a relationship with you. Cut it out!


 passionfly
Joined: 6/19/2005
Msg: 14 (view)
 
guys only message a perfect 10?
Posted: 1/3/2007 10:27:24 PM

I hate to be the bearer of bad news again.. but...

Men are visual creatures.. beauty is a reflection of physical and genetic health. men want someone that is healthy that can bear their children and beauty is the minds way of getting a man to have sex with a woman that gives him the best chance of passing on his genes. Because you are not a man and don't experience it yourself, you may not fully understand this. by contrast women will consider things subconsciously that men do not. how much a man makes.. is he a good provider for children... what position he has at work.. is he a leader and can protect you... men dont consider these things at all... but im sure youve heard women talking about them at one point or another in your life. this is why you can see an ugly guy going around with a really pretty woman.. hes someone thats in a leadership position and that status is naturally attractive......

one of the other things i didn't mention is personality. a sexy personality is a very useful thing to have for a woman. unfortunately it doesn't translate very well into print.

Where am i going with this? lol well your at a disadvantage because, one.. your a really pretty lady but you really need to get better pictures to show that.. guys like to check out a womans body.. to see the beauty of it.. two and this is a biggie... after reading your profile i suspect that you are a real fireball in person with a very sexy personality. That is very hard to convey in print. You may have better results in person somewhere than here. But trying doesn't hurt at all...

Get a lot more pictures of yourself... get a digital cam and go take some one sunny evening with your girlfriends in some sexy outfits...


Is this freakin guy for real??? holy mackeral, no wonder women are jaded
 passionfly
Joined: 6/19/2005
Msg: 57 (view)
 
Jarheads and people's first impression...
Posted: 1/2/2007 2:32:01 AM
most civilians who have never served tend to look down on military people based on inaccurate sterotyping thanks to Hollywood. Once you get out, just downplay your role because tbh most people that aren't former military do not care one cent about what you did or how hard the war was. Just be thankful your not a Vietnam era vet and people aren't spitting on you. One guy recently that I told I was a vet told me to "Prove it!" lol, some people are so funny.

Semper Fi, Brother
 passionfly
Joined: 6/19/2005
Msg: 11 (view)
 
Advice for dealing with stalkers
Posted: 1/2/2007 2:09:45 AM
yeah right so conveying I'm very dumb and naive is going to elicit nothing but the best intent from the people out there. If you PLAY the victim you will eventually get PLAYED. Its how the world is, don't blame me for it.

You send out the wrong vibes and you will get that back. This is why women attract the wrong kind of guy, the send out the wrong vibes. Play the victim and you will be one eventually. Gee, she is being stalked since 1980!!! I wonder what the common thread of her always being a victim is here, hmmmm

She can't control the stalking but she can control HER actions to not make her out to be a victim. This isn't about blaming this is about a responsibility for your own action.

If you do the SAME thing and expect different results each time then you aren't growing!
 passionfly
Joined: 6/19/2005
Msg: 9 (view)
 
Advice for dealing with stalkers
Posted: 1/2/2007 2:02:50 AM
Who knows, maybe your ability to convey that your "just a dumb blond woman..." like your profile says elicits people to take you for a victim and mess with you intentionally. Maybe your ability to constantly live in perpetual fear of the unknown, fear of men, fear of computers, fear of fear, leaves you with little room to understand the reality of the situation.

Just don't call tech support for your computer and tell them it just hiccuped, lol
 passionfly
Joined: 6/19/2005
Msg: 149 (view)
 
Ladies do you like it when a man tells you what to do?
Posted: 1/2/2007 1:34:24 AM
ok this thread is a perfect example of how men and women communicate differently. Being a guy I understood what he INFERRED by his question but being that he is a guy he wasn't as eloquent at translation and offended many women.

What he meant was if a man asks a reasonable request of his girl but does it in such a way that it makes her feel like he in charge and she is compelled to action, does this in any way turn her on? and if so, why?

He is asking this to women who like a man to make them feel like he is in charge without being bossy but relish in the idea of not having to make all the decisions all the time about everything. This is not too far off from the "he swept me off my feet" situation that many women are attracted to.

Its a pretty valid question but good intent and bad follow-through are not the same thing, heh

Its amazing how men can understand men so well and at the same time women will get incredibly (and rightfully so) offended by the same words
 passionfly
Joined: 6/19/2005
Msg: 9 (view)
 
i can only have an orgasm during intercourse, when i am on top of the man
Posted: 1/2/2007 1:15:36 AM
^----- there always has to be at least one guy like this in every thread
 passionfly
Joined: 6/19/2005
Msg: 7 (view)
 
Why is it?
Posted: 1/2/2007 1:10:41 AM

I took the test over at eharmony.com, and when I got done, they emailed me and informed me that there were no compatible females for me in their database.


ROFL, now that is some shltty luck
 passionfly
Joined: 6/19/2005
Msg: 31 (view)
 
How many dates before the first kiss???
Posted: 1/2/2007 12:51:00 AM

and move on to someone who DOES feel passionate enough to plant a big one on me...


smoochies...
 passionfly
Joined: 6/19/2005
Msg: 8 (view)
 
Best/Worst Birth Control Pills?
Posted: 1/2/2007 12:05:32 AM
worst birth control pills...green M&M's
 passionfly
Joined: 6/19/2005
Msg: 29 (view)
 
How many dates before the first kiss???
Posted: 1/1/2007 11:26:19 PM

Princess Leigh.... NOT ALL WOMAN jump in & start having sex with someone after ONLY a month!! I for one DON'T... I choose the whole "moral" thing over what everyone eles does or thinks!!
I think if the person you are with can accept ur veiws on how fast or slow you like to move in that department.... your with the right person!!
The people out there that "dump" or "break-up" with some cause they don't "put-out"... then it's their loss in the end.

As for the OP... it's the year 2007, woman DO make the first moves now-a-days!! LOL Just do it already... even if he just wants to be friends, it's just a kiss!!! GOOD LUCK!!!


any guy who dates a girl for 1 month and does not even kiss her is a chump, plain and simple.
 passionfly
Joined: 6/19/2005
Msg: 27 (view)
 
Do guys hold out?
Posted: 1/1/2007 11:19:11 PM

im sry but i think this is comical and have to comment. i didnt think men could hold out. hahahahahaha


that's because you date teens and not men, if you were, you would know this to be not true.
 passionfly
Joined: 6/19/2005
Msg: 127 (view)
 
why is it that white men tend to like skinny, white women?
Posted: 1/1/2007 11:15:57 PM
carbon based women are the shiznit!...be they skinny or curvy...
 passionfly
Joined: 6/19/2005
Msg: 9 (view)
 
Best way to start a relationship?
Posted: 1/1/2007 11:08:20 PM

On the first date over dinner or whatever look into his eyes and say "I'm actually looking for a relationship and if you just want to f^ck me then let me know now. I'm not saying I'm not gonna f^ck you I just want to know upfront what i'm dealing with"


well, that's a keeper
 passionfly
Joined: 6/19/2005
Msg: 18 (view)
 
Is sex always a part of dating?
Posted: 12/24/2006 1:45:54 AM
In all honesty here, your 60, when was the last time you had sex to even say wow I want to do this again.
 passionfly
Joined: 6/19/2005
Msg: 33 (view)
 
Are men... insecure?
Posted: 12/22/2006 4:42:13 AM

I'm trying to figure out the impossible... how men think


good luck with that one
 passionfly
Joined: 6/19/2005
Msg: 18 (view)
 
How long does it take to move on
Posted: 12/22/2006 4:32:15 AM
the answer is 42!
 passionfly
Joined: 6/19/2005
Msg: 44 (view)
 
Was I taken for a Ride?
Posted: 12/21/2006 8:10:58 PM

Mysteriously Shy,
Wow, I wanted honesty but, didn't ask for Bit---! Now, as for me being a slut, I've slept with 3 men my entire adult life. How many have you been with...not that I care to know. I'm sure I'll have to take sleeping pills tonight b/c you have no respect for me. I think not!! Yes, I made a mistake, Yes, I'm learning from it, No, I am not a slut. I saw something that wasn't there. Too bad for me, but, I'll be fine. As for you, I'll pray that you learn how to talk to people better.


wait a minute! you only slept with 3 men in your 30 years? You are sooooooo behind schedule! Chop, chop, girl, times-a-wastin!
 passionfly
Joined: 6/19/2005
Msg: 43 (view)
 
Was I taken for a Ride?
Posted: 12/21/2006 8:01:51 PM
This is the biggest load of crap I've heard in a very long time! :very mad:

It should NOT be up to the woman to seal whether you stay or bail. Whatever decision you make Passionfly is 100% on you. If you bail because a woman slept with you too soon into the relationship, you have made judgements about the woman or the relationship that are most likely incorrect and have used those judgements to make a decision.

If you meet a woman and think there might be a chance of a relationship with her, why can't you (since you knows yourself best) protect the possibility of a relationship with her by not sleeping with her until the relationship extends beyond the "too early for sex" phase?

Why do you feel it is ALL on the woman to ensure that the sex happens at precisely the right time??? Oh and by the way....how soon is too soon in your books? Do you tell women that when you start dating them?


who said this is about me? Did I mention >>>>I<<<< do this? This is how the REAL WORLD works. Oh I'm sorry no man ever ever in the history of sex broke up with a girl after they had sex in the first or second date. Wow! What was I thinking?

First of all Einstein, The OP is FEMALE. I am giving advice to a FEMALE. Since she is FEMALE she cant very well control what the MALE does now can she? Hence, my post stands as is no correction necessary. And furthermore since this is the "Ask a guy" section of the forums it is very very redundant to get hyper with "And guys do it too" kind of responses. Guys do EVERYTHING women do, and vice versa, but that is not the topic here now is it? There is no need for every single thread to always have a woman on the "Ask a guy" forum to chirp in "And guys do it too!" "And guys do it too!" (We need a new acronym for this condition, how about AGDIT !!! AGDIT is redundant when you have a woman posting in the "ask a guy forum" and there is always that one pissed-off woman that gets all red-faced angry, spewing AGDIT's everywhere. We know! We hear you! Stop AGDITing all over the place!!!!

Please, learn to READ a thread correctly and get your facts staight before you go on a rant that is absurd cause you make yourself look very bad. Good grief, some people need medication, myself being one of them!
 passionfly
Joined: 6/19/2005
Msg: 22 (view)
 
The Way You Touch Me....
Posted: 12/21/2006 7:33:17 PM
The reason touch is so important is that it releases endorphines in the brain. As a child its very very crucial they get kinetic touching in order to create healthy endorphine releases. Children as so darn cute its very easy to touch em, hug em, pat their head, etc. If someone does not get enough touching as a child they grow up very withdrawn, reclusive and violent!

They did a study on monkeys about 15 years ago that involved a baby monkey raised by a real monkey mom and an artifical doll made to look like a monkey. The one raised by the artificial monkey was completely detached from touch and HATED it from anyone. When she finally had her own baby she refused to touch it at all. The baby would run after her and the mother would push it away from her. She abhored touching or being touched. The one raised by the artificial mother was also more prone to violence and serious rage attacks.

The level of endorphine in the artificial mom monkey were almost nonexistant. The regular monkey was very normal.
 passionfly
Joined: 6/19/2005
Msg: 108 (view)
 
Why are you on POF?
Posted: 12/21/2006 7:37:45 AM
I'm here for the ice cream

and this little fella ----->

no other site has a dancing green banana, cmon, I dare you to find one!
 passionfly
Joined: 6/19/2005
Msg: 60 (view)
 
A woman's testing
Posted: 12/21/2006 7:13:52 AM
I dont do well on tests unless I study for them...sometimes even then. You will quickly discover that people dont like to be tested, especially if they dont know its happening. So for all you test'ers' out there give it a rest. Life is full of tests no need to make more and for all the test'ees' yup confront them on it. I have only been told once that I was being tested - after the fact. I was not impressed.


Doing well on a test means you are taking someones test and the topic on this thread is about WOMEN testing men not vice versa. Women don't "make" more tests they just test as a instinctive normal natural reaction. If someone is telling you they are testing you THEN that is manipulative and unnecessary. Consciously and with intent is when its wrong and unnecessary. We are reffering mostly to the subconscious, matter-of-fact kind of tests that happen instinctively and on the spur of the moment. Big difference.

Yes men test too but that is not what this topic is about. Please understand the topic.

Once a relationship is established a woman doesn't test as they do initially in the courtship before she makes her choice. During a marriage even a woman will test her man on occasion and based on his result is whether a woman will feel attraction for him stronger or weaker. A test is a normal natural instinctive ability that either heightens or wanes attraction in a woman.


No, that's just plain old rude, spoiled, and immature. You guys are a lot nicer than me, unless SHE was driving and paying the bill, we'de be eating at the original restaraunt. LOL


yes! it is rude, spoiled and immature for her to act like this but that's why you need to become a leader in that respect and gently guide that sort of behavior to something more appropriate. You don't just bail out of a relationship when she does this but you adjust the behavior by adjusting your reaction to that behavior as one of firm stance. Its not being a jerk its about laying a pattern where this is my boundary for you silly behavior and I'm not going over it. And when the cute waitress starts talking to me while I'm eating inside and your hungry outside that sort of behavior gets adjusted fast! lol

Look, I have not had this happen to me but this sort of wishy washy "Oh, I dont like this restaurant, oh I dont like that restaurant" behavior has happened to a few of my friends have had with their girlfriends. Instead of getting a spine they just cowtowed to her whim and then wondered why they were breaking up not long after. All I could scream was "your a doormat you fool!"
 passionfly
Joined: 6/19/2005
Msg: 2 (view)
 
guys that say there coming home but dont
Posted: 12/20/2006 5:04:06 PM
maybe he was in the bathroom and got his weiner caught in his zipper now his franks are above his beans and the fire department can't get him out of this situation until Tuesday when a specialist has to be called in.
 passionfly
Joined: 6/19/2005
Msg: 16 (view)
 
physical attraction with ur gf
Posted: 12/20/2006 4:56:08 PM

NOT IN A MILLION YEARS!!!


ROFLMAO, the best answer so far
 passionfly
Joined: 6/19/2005
Msg: 52 (view)
 
A woman's testing
Posted: 12/20/2006 4:47:53 PM

P.S. This scenario is played out in every man/woman relationship:

1. Woman: Here, eat this forbidden fruit.

2a. Man: OK, thanks.
or
2b. Man: Put the apple down Eve!

So which option passes the test?


2c. Man: Who gave you that apple?

[Kill the snake, make kebobs out of it and throw out the apple since snake offers more sustanance then some silly apple.]

 passionfly
Joined: 6/19/2005
Msg: 51 (view)
 
A woman's testing
Posted: 12/20/2006 4:17:29 PM
This all makes my head hurt.

I've been trying to read up on this, and everything I've been reading up on agrees with what you just said.

Yes, I've been trying to break the nice-guyisms. But in this situation, I don't get it. My ability to be accomidating and make sure she's comfortable and satisfied typically takes over. And me not really caring what or where I eat, as long as it's not financially disruptive, might agree with her decision. As long as I get to be with her, that's all I care about. We could go to McDonalds and I'd usually be happy. I'd much rather come to a MUTUAL decision...not try to show her who's boss. (I STILL don't get the jerk thing, even though I've heard it over and over.)

But everything I'm hearing says this is wrong. That I should treat her like crap and fulfil my own selfishness. I don't want to deal with that biatch waiting in the car. Yes, I WOULD be willing to break up with someone like that. Maybe not the first time, but after multiple times, she can get out of the car and walk her ass home, and I can order the steak AND the lobster to myself.
And they may not like it then, but they'll respect it in the long run? I'd ask women about this, but I'm not really sure I'd get a good answer.

It's kind of depressing to think about.


I understand your concern, ukobalt, and in my example I gave I'm not suggesting its her birthday and your taking her out to eat and being a di ck about it regardless, but if you say to her "What restaurant do you want to go eat?" and she replies "I don't care" and THEN changes her mind at the restaurant it took you both 45 minutes to drive to and says lets not eat here, lets eat at this other restaurant another 30 minutes drive away its definately a test. A subconscious test, but nevertheless. You fail a simple test like this enough times and even she won't understand why she is no longer attracted to you anymore. Do you get what I'm saying? Its really not her fault, she is on autopilot, YOUR the one failing!

ALL WOMEN test 100% of every single female on the planet test. The have done it in the past, they will do it in the future and if we start to habitate Mars they will even do it there too. BUT, their is different degrees of tests and its based on their social status compared to yours. The ones that test the most are the ones that are higher up on the social ladder. Almost all do it subconsciously too. The ones that do it the most - the extremely coveted attractive ones, the perfect 10's so to speak. They get inundated in their day to day existence with offers of money, sex, promises etc etc. It becomes such a pain in the ass for them that their radar is instinctively turned on to test each and every male that sends her any sort of intent on being with her. She is on autopilot at this point. She will test you at each single step and in some cases its like you are going 2 steps forward and 1 step back with each new situation you both are in, whether its going out to eat or parking the stupid car. If you are not prepared to handle a woman like this her tests can drive you nuts. If you CAN handle the tests with ease, then guess what, your the guy walking into a room with a hottie and everyone goes "how the hell did he get her????" He passed her tests is how.

Lets put this to another example, lets take Pamela Anderson and a guy named Joe who works at the local car wash. He is a reasonably good looking guy, he has his own place, pays his bills on time and basically has his sh it together. Pamela is single and comes in for a car wash and he starts talking to her, she finds him interesting, sexy and exciting and they set a date. On this date she is testing this poor sap like every 5 freakin minutes. Its like a cab in downtown Manhattan stuck in gridlock and the meter is running and running and running and your gonna pay a crapload and still get nowhere. Like every single tick on a cab's fare box he is being tested. Joe is basically fu cked, but not by Pamela. His social status compared to her fame are an incredible disparity. Now Pamela meets Kid Rock, hes a famous rock star, he has a printing press in his house that bascially prints money for him when he is sleeping and its running 24/7. She already knows his fame has garnered him adulation from millions, he has been on the E! network seen with countless gorgeous models and actresses he has dated. She knows all this about him before they even meet. As he does about her too. How many tests do you think he needs? Just ONE! When is he going to ask her to marry him...I guess he passed that one rather fast too, lol

...are you getting it now more?
 passionfly
Joined: 6/19/2005
Msg: 37 (view)
 
A woman's testing
Posted: 12/20/2006 6:11:26 AM
if a woman decides to test me, it's over.

I will not continue a relationship with someone who would want to bring that kind of attitude into a relationship. if you feel the need to test your partner . . . you are in no condition to give the kind of trust that is needed in a relationship.


omg, listen to yourself! So if a you pick a restaurant to go to and she says, lets go here instead you would just break up with her???

That is an example of a test she will do subconciously to see if you are a leader or will follow her every whim. If you pick her restaurant, guess what, you failed! Its not her fault you make a decision and don't stick to it.

I would in this example say to her we can go to that restaurant next time, park in front of the original restaurant, open her door and if she still stays in the car, walk in and start looking at the menu. Eventually she will get hungry and come inside. At least you weren't wishy washy and made a decision, gave her an option for her decision for a later time but still stuck to the original plan. A guy who knows what he wants isn't going to just change his decisions on the spur of the moment. You must be a lapdog for any whim a girl throws at you. And beleive me she may balk at not listening to her but she will respect and be attracted to you for being firm and standing up to her.
 passionfly
Joined: 6/19/2005
Msg: 7 (view)
 
physical attraction with ur gf
Posted: 12/20/2006 5:42:38 AM
whoa, hold it right there before this miscommunication gets out of hand and you misinterpret the young guy. Speaking from personal experience when I was in my teens I had no clue how to get intimate. Either the girl doesn't know how to give the signals that she is ready at that moment or the guy doesn't know to read those signals to proceed. Its a girls role to send out subtle signals and a guys role to read them and act. This is typically and not a firm rule. It could be reversed too. Usually its the guy who is not very good at reading her signals. This takes practise to learn what works and what doesn't or you learn from someone else.

Guys, when they are maturing aren't likely to ask their buddies how to get some girl into bed by asking them so they are pretty much on their own. There is no class for this in school, the government doesn't send you a pamphlet, your on your own to experiment what works and what doesn't. Girls, when they are young aren't much help either if you ask them since a girl feels a guy is supposed to know already what to do and a girl won't paint you any picture on how to seduce her at all. Communication may or may not work depending on both of their maturity levels at conveying their feelings.

When a guy is young he is basically supposed to try some advance and see if it works and if it doesnt and if she rebuffs him try something else or try a bit later. There are some good books out there on reading body signals and whatnot but its just best that if his sex drive is normal he should just try something and see if it works rather then nothing at all. She can of course make the first moves but at a young age its very very unlikely a girl will. Its up to the guy.

My guess he is clueless how to proceed and actually is attracted to her but is afraid of rejection from her. Once a guy is rejected he feels she doesn't want him at all so he is afraid to try again. This of course is not true it just means she isn't ready at that moment and he can try later or a different approach and eventually he should be fine. If she starts out by kissing him first if he is that clueless I would venture that nature will eventually take its course and you both can get to the next step of actually, touching, petting and eventually sex.

Maybe if the poster above me were more understanding of what a young guy has to go through in his road to maturity in becoming a man she wouldn't make such dopey comments. Also jennydee, maybe if you learned to read what the OP said about it not being her who has this problem but her FRIEND, you could answer with more positive advice. This is why there is so much miscommunication when it comes to love and sex, people just do not pay attention to words and signals, as the poster above me has clearly demonstrated, lol
 passionfly
Joined: 6/19/2005
Msg: 32 (view)
 
A woman's testing
Posted: 12/19/2006 1:12:45 PM
Bad news my friend. ALL WOMEN DO IT (and most do it subconciously). If you think that you'll find a woman who will not test you, well -- good luck. You may lower the amount of "tests" you receive but never eliminate them completely.

A lot of women have varying degrees of insecurity but that's not what's driving the test. The test are designed to make sure you are a MAN and not a boy in a man's clothing so to speak. They want to make sure that you can stand up to them and be a man at all times. That's why the tests are always going on to one degree or another.

Deep down a lot of women desire to follow a man. Not very many women I know want to LEAD in a relationship. So she's testing your "leadership" capabilities to make sure that she's not being lead astry or by an inferior leader.


Jabarian is absolutely correct, all women do it and they don't even realize they are. This is something you need to understand when a woman tests you she is actually a HEALTHY girl. Its a good thing when they test you and its not negative. A woman has a right to test you in order to know you are correct for her.

Look, every girl has a set of doors you need to be able to get through in order for her to be able to be seen by her as being the correct one she needs in her life. If you fail that test the door closes, and rightfully so YOU failed the test. Its not her fault, your the one who failed it! The thing you need to concentrate on is YOURSELF not her. If you have congruent good personality traits then YOUR ability to pass her tests become subconcious just as her testing you is subconscious. Afterwards, true deep attraction between you both develop.

Believe me you want this to be in place. Its natures way of determining the correct path to finding a strong mate for the strongest woman. If your not able to qualify yourself to a girl you go by the wayside. And rightfully so. Image the type of drama that would ensue if you failed EVERY test she puts up, you fail and she still stays with you. Does this even sound remotely like a healthy person mentally? Think about it. Is this the type of girl you really want to be with?

The beauty of this is is that its super easy! Passing a test she may throw at you is a no brainer if your confidence, self assurance in who you are, where you are heading and what you want out of life are all in a row. Women will flock to these traits and their "tests" will become mitigated the slightest second they appear. Your natural ability to lead her where she wants to go in life will allow her to see you truely are the man she is looking for. You are not being deceitful, lying, avoiding the issue but you burst through any test she may put up and its like making a skiing run downhill. You whip past every checkpoint and make it to the finishline in record time.

When a girl is testing me I say BRING IT, I was born ready!
 passionfly
Joined: 6/19/2005
Msg: 7 (view)
 
Why do Guys get your Phone Number
Posted: 12/19/2006 12:32:10 PM
someone CAPS LOCK key seems to be stuck

It could be worse, you could be in a humvee in Iraq right now riding on patrol, not knowing if your going to live or die today.

Things in life that seem so serious really really aren't if you think about them.
 passionfly
Joined: 6/19/2005
Msg: 33 (view)
 
Have men lost the urge?
Posted: 12/19/2006 12:27:54 PM
Thank you Ron9, for saying what so many of us guys feel so strongly about, you ROCK bro!

I look forward to being that wise one day
 
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