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 Author Thread: Would love to move to Europe from Canada one day.. Any suggestions? Personal Experiences?
 djc02359
Joined: 7/20/2005
Msg: 5 (view)
 
Would love to move to Europe from Canada one day.. Any suggestions? Personal Experiences?
Posted: 9/12/2009 6:09:11 AM
Become a teacher!! There are International Schools all over the world! I taught in Dresden, Germany for two years- You get paid, you can travel, and your kids even go to the school for FREE in most schools! You can teach for 2-3 years in one school and then transfer to another in a different country. I met people who have done this all their lives.
 djc02359
Joined: 7/20/2005
Msg: 41 (view)
 
Fellow world travelers? Where have you been, and where do you want to go?
Posted: 9/12/2009 6:04:36 AM
I just came back from Germany. I lived in Dresden for 2 years- beautiful city by the way. I was a "Teacher-Tourist" there and took every chance I could to visit other places. In two years I visited Paris, Lyon, Nice- Bruxxells, then Vienna, Zurich, Rome, Berlin, Prague & Stockholm. When you live in Europe you can take little mini vacations- Sometimes we even went just for a weekend. Last summer I visited Croatia and walked the city wall in Dubrovnik at sunset. Two of my favorite trips were to Cesky Krumlov in the Czech Republic- and El Quseir in Egypt. I am addicted to travel now. I just joined Housecarers.com. I'm thinking about house sitting in France or Germany.
 djc02359
Joined: 7/20/2005
Msg: 10 (view)
 
Thinking Spain, Greece, and Thailand... Suggestions?
Posted: 9/12/2009 5:57:31 AM
Visit Croatia!! I spent a week there last summer. Walk the city wall in Dubrovnik at sunset. I'd love to go back and island hop- so if you need a trvel partner- just let me know!
 djc02359
Joined: 7/20/2005
Msg: 12 (view)
 
Casting a Broader Net
Posted: 1/23/2008 9:40:03 PM
I am living in Germany for the next couple years. I'm sure that people may wonder why I come here, but it's American men are more familiar and I do plan to come home eventually. I haven't actually dated any German men- For one thing the language is a stumbling block, . But, also..I don't think I'd ever plan to stay here longer than a few years. I guess that means I've cast a VERY broad net. My only hope would be to meet a man from the states who's a real traveler because I doubt a long-term epal would ever come to anything. If he's not willing to take the risk to come and meet me, then I'm sure we'd both lose interest. Sometimes I wonder if this life choice ( moving to Germany) has cost me the possibility of a relationship because I'll be over 60 when I return. Do anyone think that it's possible to cast a net "across the pond??"
 djc02359
Joined: 7/20/2005
Msg: 7 (view)
 
Work and Travel Abrod
Posted: 11/4/2007 10:05:47 AM
I'm presently living in Dresden, Germany. It's such a beautiful city!! I am teaching in an International School~ retired from teaching in the states and decided I wanted to start doing the things on m y Life ToDo List.
1. Live in a foreign country
2. Live in a city
3. Become fluent in French

( well, ok..I might be learning German instead of French, but 2 out of 3 isn't bad!)
 djc02359
Joined: 7/20/2005
Msg: 32 (view)
 
Why are older men so SEX oriented???????
Posted: 10/3/2007 8:18:19 PM
Sex Schmexxxx, OP..what's the big deal?? What's wrong with being desired??? I'd worry more if a man didn't want to have sex with me. If you aren't interested (yet, or ever) then just TELL him! We need to use our WORDS, ladies!! If he won't take no for an answer, then you probably don't like him anyways.

I'm no sultry temptress, nor am I a nymphomaniac, but sex is a perfectly healthy part of Life- and I wouldn't want a relationship that doesn't include it.

And then there are those women who complain just to brag about how desirable they are..not saying you're one of them, OP.
 djc02359
Joined: 7/20/2005
Msg: 31 (view)
 
Why are older men so SEX oriented???????
Posted: 10/3/2007 8:07:05 PM
well, Arte..Oktoberfest would be the time, then, wouldn't it??
 djc02359
Joined: 7/20/2005
Msg: 7 (view)
 
Why are older men so SEX oriented???????
Posted: 10/3/2007 11:32:10 AM
wouldn't mind meeting some sex oriented guys right now..or ANY guys for that matter. I'm living in Germany and tried to post a new thread but I keep getting kicked out..So, if any of those SEX oriented men are planning a trip- come to Dresden. I'm lonely.
 djc02359
Joined: 7/20/2005
Msg: 2 (view)
 
Germany next year
Posted: 10/3/2007 11:23:20 AM
I'm in Dresden right now. It's beautiful bt a little lonely. I don't know how to meet anyone besides the people I work with, and most of them are half my age...I don't know anything about tours but Dresden is a beautiful city and very user friendly. Let me know if you're in town!
 djc02359
Joined: 7/20/2005
Msg: 7 (view)
 
Hipper than our kids
Posted: 3/17/2007 4:21:21 PM
My daughter wanted a tattoo for a birthday gift~ so I said- "Maybe I'll get one too!" She couldn't BELIEVE I went through with it! She took pictures and told all her friends. Hey, It's only skin! I happen to like it now- and almost think I may get another. My son thinks I'm pretty cool too. He told me he was bragging about me cuz I'm retiring in June and moving to Germany just to teach 3 more years! They both think I'm pretty hip-but they are definitely hip, too! I'd definitely hang out with them if I was still 20 something!
 djc02359
Joined: 7/20/2005
Msg: 11 (view)
 
How have your passions changed as you get older?
Posted: 3/12/2007 4:43:56 PM
I am passionate about many of the same things, but I've added a few. The one thing that HAS changed is that I feel free to express myself. Now I paint- sculpt, decorate, and don't give a da*n what others think. It's such a wonderful feeling to REALLY not care if I do these things well. I do them because I love to do them.
 djc02359
Joined: 7/20/2005
Msg: 22 (view)
 
That old fire rekindled
Posted: 3/12/2007 4:28:03 PM
My Dear Op,
You must always keep in mind that the people who respond to your posts have their own point of view. Those who don't think sex is important think everyone should agree with their perspective- those who think it is important- think the same. No one EVER knows you and/or your wife well enough to decide what is right or wrong. Probably just writing about your feelings will help you to sort them all out. But ONLY you can decide.

As a VERY wise man once said:

"Be who you are and say what you feel because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind.” — Dr. Seuss
 djc02359
Joined: 7/20/2005
Msg: 42 (view)
 
Changing What You Are Looking For...
Posted: 3/12/2007 4:05:53 PM
someone who can make me laugh until my face hurts. ( and having a good healthy libido wouldn't hurt.
 djc02359
Joined: 7/20/2005
Msg: 99 (view)
 
Is kissing more or less important to you in a relationship as you get older?
Posted: 3/12/2007 4:03:21 PM
I believe kissing is underrated. I don't believe that one is a good or bad kisser. I believe that the energy and feeling between the two people is what can make the experience memorable.
 djc02359
Joined: 7/20/2005
Msg: 2 (view)
 
been dating since beginning of Oct- he doesn't want sex...
Posted: 11/26/2006 2:03:57 PM
Bluezzz,
I knew that would be the reaction of a lot of people. But we can only judge by our own experiences, and I haven't had this experience in 6 years of dating ( dating post divorce) I'm also not saying that I would definitely say yes- I just find it unusual. As for the communication- I did bring it up because I wasn't sure what he was looking for- a buddy or a lover. He was giving me a lot of mixed signals. That was when he said he wasn't ready.

But, out of curiosity~ does anyone know if diabetes can really cause impotence? And, if so- is it treatable?
 djc02359
Joined: 7/20/2005
Msg: 1 (view)
 
been dating since beginning of Oct- he doesn't want sex...
Posted: 11/26/2006 1:40:59 PM
It's not that I have such a strong libido- but I've never had this experience...we've had 3rd date, 4th.. and 5th dates- spent all day together, kiss..hug.. and then he goes home. It's a 90 minutes drive. I finally asked him if he's attracted to me and he said yes, but isn't ready for a sexual relationship..am I being paranoid, or do you think there could be a dysfunction here?? He does have diabetes, and I know that can be a problem for getting , keeping erections... but in this a day and age, who hasn't heard of Viagra?? I can now identify with the ,em if wait a while and then decide to move on because it looks like there will never be a sexual relationship.
 djc02359
Joined: 7/20/2005
Msg: 191 (view)
 
Question for the guys...Should us women say NO SEX on the 1st date BEFORE the date?
Posted: 11/3/2006 3:08:58 PM
Aww. sex.. schmexx..it takes up too much of our time and thoughts when we have to think about when- with whom- ..I agree with the poster who said, "Have no expectations."

I have learned that every experience I have is new and I will ALWAYS learn something from it if I choose to. I have had dates ONLY to have sex..and I have dated men for weeks with no sex..You can't make decisions about circumstances that haven't yet happened.

We are all just Bozos on the Bus, folks..not creatures from other planets..we have the same desires, needs, and wants...

BTW_You should always respect a queen's opinion!!
 djc02359
Joined: 7/20/2005
Msg: 9 (view)
 
Why is everyone so depressed?
Posted: 4/17/2006 6:03:26 AM
Now..the question "Why is everyone so depressed?" is an interesting one.

My own personal theory is that clinical depression is caused by the imbalance in the body WHICH is caused by the toxins we put into our bodies every day. These toxins are found in ciggarettes, alcohol, food additives and the drugs used to treat all of these addictions. (I personally feel that refined sugar and flour products are two of the culprits that set this addiction cycle in motion.) The older we become, the harder it is to maintain this balance due to the damage that has been done by these toxins as we age. Therefore, people in their 20s and 30s experience the depression less because their bodies have a more ability to compensate and rebuild their bodies' damaged systems.

Unfortunately, once on the hamster wheel..it's pretty damn hard to get off....ex. Do I take the Prosac to alleviate the symptoms of depression which keep me from living a healthier life style..which initially caused the depression?? Or do I try to get out of the depression by myself, hoping I'll feel better and start living a healthier life style which will therefore negate the need for the Prosac????

~Just my opinion
PS If you've never experienced clinical depression, you don't really have the right to judge others who suffer from it.
 djc02359
Joined: 7/20/2005
Msg: 7 (view)
 
Why is everyone so depressed?
Posted: 4/17/2006 5:45:57 AM
Online forums attract depressed people like flies to hitshay...and it's a great place to dump a lot of stuff because you don't know the other people. When I am depressed I don't want to bring friends and family down, so this is the place to vent if you ask me.
 djc02359
Joined: 7/20/2005
Msg: 2 (view)
 
Question about POF Instant Message...
Posted: 3/21/2006 4:34:35 PM
tHANKS, Denim..so in other words..If I don't want the little IM User to show up under my name I have to disable it?
 djc02359
Joined: 7/20/2005
Msg: 51 (view)
 
How much does a profession play a part in choosing a mate??
Posted: 3/20/2006 3:37:35 PM
I don't define who I am by what I do..but you have to admit...

A person's profession tells a lot about the kind of person he/she is. If MONEY was one of my top priorities I certainly would not have chosen to be a teacher. ..at least not in the US

So..I guess that the kind of work a person does would factor into choosing a mate..but I would certainly try NOT to judge a person using generalities..(ie..lawyers are sleezy, doctors are all intelligent, postal workers have anger issues..etc etc) Judging is the problem there!
 djc02359
Joined: 7/20/2005
Msg: 18 (view)
 
How much does a profession play a part in choosing a mate??
Posted: 3/19/2006 1:10:31 PM
Getta CLUE ImSneaky..I'm from Massachusetts..a school teacher..Master's Degree..Worked 34 years..I don't even make $70,000.
 djc02359
Joined: 7/20/2005
Msg: 1 (view)
 
Question about POF Instant Message...
Posted: 3/19/2006 1:06:02 PM
Hi..Can anybody help? When I go to my mailbox and see men above with Instant Message under the name..does it just mean that he has it on? Or does it mean that he's busy messaging someone? Does it show up for me whenever I'm online?? Sorry..I just don't get how this works.
 djc02359
Joined: 7/20/2005
Msg: 12 (view)
 
How much does a profession play a part in choosing a mate??
Posted: 3/19/2006 12:53:28 PM
BTW~ ImSneaky..I've survived for 35 years making less than 6 digits..I've also been the main bread winner, bought a house, educated 2 kids and have a plan for my retirement..Jeesh..YOU must be one of those TrustFund Babies I was talking about.
 djc02359
Joined: 7/20/2005
Msg: 11 (view)
 
How much does a profession play a part in choosing a mate??
Posted: 3/19/2006 12:50:53 PM
I agree that a person has to like what they do...and not be obsessive about it.


BUT..If you are really talking about how financially successful... I'm not impressed with a person based on how much money he makes. The profiles with men in front of their Mercedes with lots of references to their vacation homes just turns me off. I think it would matter more HOW he managed his money. If a guy makes 6 figures and spends double that I'd worry about a long term relationship. If a man makes a modest amount and lives within his means I'd feel more comfortable becoming involved with him.

Now..when it comes to intelligence..THAT makes a difference. I'd rather date a garbage man with a brain than a Trust Fund Baby without one.
 djc02359
Joined: 7/20/2005
Msg: 49 (view)
 
Who, in here, finda a sense of humour sexy versus the serious type.
Posted: 3/18/2006 2:53:41 PM
A man will never get me into bed if he can't make me laugh
 djc02359
Joined: 7/20/2005
Msg: 23 (view)
 
funny body changes
Posted: 3/5/2006 2:19:13 PM
I now believe in time travel...I went to bed when I was 40 something and woke up at 56 last month! ..Maybe I slept in a Tardis.
 djc02359
Joined: 7/20/2005
Msg: 2 (view)
 
for those about to rock i salute you
Posted: 2/12/2006 6:48:46 AM
artful...someone on POV once said he believes in Time Travel..He went to bed when he was 25 and then woke one day at 50! I know what you mean about the shock. I didn't know my head was still going to be 20 something when my body turned 56!! I have soooo much fun hanging with my 20 something kids & their friends because it's like going back in time to the age I feel in my head!

But I also love being my age. I couldn't care less what others think of me. Sex gets better and better, and I can do whatever I want...(depending on ehat's in the bank, that is.) I am retiring next June and trying to figure out what to do with the next chapter in my life. It's very exciting! I can try a totally different career with the back up of my pension, and if I don't like the work I can actually say. "Take this job and shove it!!" LIFE IS GOOD!!
 djc02359
Joined: 7/20/2005
Msg: 16 (view)
 
Growing old gracefully or just growing old?
Posted: 2/12/2006 6:36:01 AM
Here's MY favorite quote!

"Life is not a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving with a pretty and well preserved body but rather to skid in broadside, thoroughly used up, totally worn out and loudly proclaiming---'WOW! What a ride!' "

 djc02359
Joined: 7/20/2005
Msg: 46 (view)
 
Is dating in 2006 almost the same as when we were in our teens?
Posted: 2/12/2006 6:29:31 AM
I've dated more since 2000 (when I split from the ex) than I did all through the 60s and 70s before I married. When I was a teenager my sister died of cancer, 6 months later 2 friends were killed in a car accident and a year after that my dad died from a cerebral hemorhage. I didn't have a normal adolescence because of all of this trauma. In college I spent most of the weekends getting drunk to dull the pain of my unprocessed grief.(of course I didn't realize that at the time.) I married in the 70s, had kids, etc. Now I am single, sober and experiencing my own personal adolescence. It's been LOADS of fun! But I think I've had enough. I'm now looking for someone to grow old with now. Communication is my first priority. ...Sex comes next, and I won't even consider a man who doesn't have a sense of humor.
 djc02359
Joined: 7/20/2005
Msg: 8 (view)
 
Why Activity Partner?
Posted: 2/12/2006 5:59:49 AM
I am in total agreement KaNaDa
 djc02359
Joined: 7/20/2005
Msg: 13 (view)
 
sex and dating
Posted: 2/12/2006 5:26:52 AM
Hey Folks~ I doubt there'd EVER be an agreement on this topic. It's kind of a "To Each His Own." thing. To ME:
Dating= No SEX (haven't decided yet)
"Seeing Someone"= Sex with ONLY him. But that's just me.
 djc02359
Joined: 7/20/2005
Msg: 7 (view)
 
Why Activity Partner?
Posted: 2/12/2006 3:53:59 AM
Maybe it means that you just want to get to know someone first w/o the added stress of "should I, or shouldn't I sleep with him/her?" But I assumed that sex would NOT be one of the activities.

Oh! hold on~ "DATING" could be considered an activity/...GEESH!! Life is so complicated when it's in text!
 djc02359
Joined: 7/20/2005
Msg: 7 (view)
 
Importance of a woman's salary?
Posted: 1/28/2006 6:24:19 PM
It's funny..I have recently met a few men who have very little money. I'm not a gold digger but I do consider the fact that I don't make enough to support someone else, so from that standpoint I guess I am interested in how much the man makes...

I guess no one wants to be used.
 djc02359
Joined: 7/20/2005
Msg: 121 (view)
 
IQ, Important or not
Posted: 1/25/2006 4:09:25 PM
IQs are interesting..but I am far more interested in a man's EQ. (Emotional Quotient) In Life we should not be judged by our abilities OR our intelligence. We should be judged by our ACTIONS. It's what a person does with what they have that's important to me.

Just my opinion.
 djc02359
Joined: 7/20/2005
Msg: 213 (view)
 
42 to 62 Year Olds Meet in Here!
Posted: 1/21/2006 6:18:31 PM
Hi Everybody!
Hey Young! I'm NEVER intimidated by a man who can cook. I can't cook anything unless it comes in a plastic bag you drop into boiling water..or comes with directions for the Microwave. I finally stopped feeling bad about it...a woman who can't cook?? SO WHAT?? My talents are found in different rooms of the house besides the kitchen!!
 djc02359
Joined: 7/20/2005
Msg: 29 (view)
 
Is it possible to fall in love with someone before meeting them in person?
Posted: 1/20/2006 4:08:55 PM
I think really loving someone with all of your heart and soul is a choice and a committment. Many people think they are in love when they are in LUST..they find out it wasn't real when the newness wears off and they become bored. At this point, they may or may not choose to love and committ to each other. Love is an action. I don't believe it can happen unless the person is choosing it.People have different motives for the way they act. Some men/women take hostages...others are codependent, and even more are just plain lonely and/or bored. Lots of married men "fall in love"(they think) when it is just a way to get outr of a marriage that they don't even know they want out of. The affair is the action that precipitates this. Many women "fall in love" because they want someone to take care of them.I don't consider any of these to be true love relationships.

My interpretation of love is when you want the other person to grow to become his or her best....even if it means that they leave must you to achieve their goals and dreams.This kind of love is unselfish and expects/demands nothing in return. I think it's a rarity.
 djc02359
Joined: 7/20/2005
Msg: 135 (view)
 
42 to 62 Year Olds Meet in Here!
Posted: 1/19/2006 4:42:32 AM
PS..Does mud improve the looks of a naked 56 yr old body?? I hope so!
 djc02359
Joined: 7/20/2005
Msg: 134 (view)
 
42 to 62 Year Olds Meet in Here!
Posted: 1/19/2006 4:41:09 AM
G'morning to YOU, Drake..I'll have another cup of coffee with you..I've been wrestling with job responsibilities, bill paying, raising a family while working and going to school, and my conscience for years..think that'll help me??
 djc02359
Joined: 7/20/2005
Msg: 133 (view)
 
42 to 62 Year Olds Meet in Here!
Posted: 1/19/2006 3:40:31 AM
LadyJane,
I agree!! I LOVE hanging out with my kids. MY son's 25 and daughter's 22. I spent Thanksgiving in Austin,TX with them. We went out and listened to great music on 6th street. I feel like I'm 20 something again, and love to laugh until my cheeks and sides ache!

I have heard from those "Boy-Toys" too! Flattering but weird. I was once told I was a MILF..but up close he would probably decide the M should be a G (for Grandmother.)

I love being this age.(56 on Tuesday) BUT it was a shock when I noticed that OLDER woman in the mirror one day. Where did she come from???? Someone on this thread said they believe in time travel. You fall asleep at 25 and wake up one day in your 50s!! How true.
Have a great day everyone! Hope you're all here when I get home from work! Maybe I'll be able to join the nude mudwrestling then..just don't tell my kids!!
 djc02359
Joined: 7/20/2005
Msg: 121 (view)
 
42 to 62 Year Olds Meet in Here!
Posted: 1/18/2006 2:57:47 PM
WOW!! You guys have all been busy ..I had to work today and didn't get to visit until now! Happy Birthday, Blow~ Mine was yesterday..but I'm a tad older...You know what they say, though.."The riper the berry, the sweeter the juice!"

Hi Everybody! I think this is where I should always hang out. It seems like lots of the other threads start out civilized, and then something happens on the 3rd or 4th page & all of a sudden people turn negative on the Op or a poster and it's like a feeding frenzy..What's up with that??????

Oh well..Everyone is so great here..I just want you all to know I think You're all wonderful!!
oops..gotta get back to work..
 djc02359
Joined: 7/20/2005
Msg: 98 (view)
 
42 to 62 Year Olds Meet in Here!
Posted: 1/18/2006 3:20:54 AM
Jim ,
Women have to watch out for golddiggers too! I don't mind a man leaning on me, but I don't want to have to hold him up! I have met a few men who seemed to want to move right in with me.. I have friends who have been taken advantage of financially.

On the other hand, some men make sure that you know they have a lot of money. If a man needs to show of his cars and vacation homes..I sometimes wonder if there is some "little" thing he's hiding.....
 djc02359
Joined: 7/20/2005
Msg: 94 (view)
 
42 to 62 Year Olds Meet in Here!
Posted: 1/17/2006 7:10:07 PM
Hey Welshgal...I like to think of MY hot flashes as power surges!..and appreciate the fact that I get to have my own personal summer!
 djc02359
Joined: 7/20/2005
Msg: 9 (view)
 
Is it possible to fall in love with someone before meeting them in person?
Posted: 1/17/2006 4:34:39 PM
I think many people fall in love with falling in love...
 djc02359
Joined: 7/20/2005
Msg: 16 (view)
 
not all people without pics are insecure
Posted: 1/17/2006 4:30:44 PM
I think it's alright to have preferences, but I like to keep an open mind...and my brain hasn't fallen out yet
 djc02359
Joined: 7/20/2005
Msg: 91 (view)
 
42 to 62 Year Olds Meet in Here!
Posted: 1/17/2006 12:21:49 PM
Hey!" I Yam what I Yam" as Popeye used to say. I am divorced..to some that might mean baggage or spoiled goods. I am single..To some that might mean WTF? Not married at HER age??? I can't be bothered worrying about what people might think. If it's meant to be that I meet Mr. Wonderful here then I will..no matter what my profile states. I can only try my best to be honest.

Once, in a weak moment I asked someone to read my profile and give me some suggestions to improve it. He tore it and me to shreds!! He made me think I was the biggest jerk in Cyberspace! I'll never do THAT again. It taught me that I don't ask.I've decided that acceptance is key. Love me or leave me alone. So..I'll accept what I am..and I'll HAVE to accept whatever happens in the future...
 djc02359
Joined: 7/20/2005
Msg: 6 (view)
 
Would you go out with someone your not interested in?
Posted: 1/17/2006 11:50:56 AM
I can't decide if I like a person after one date. If he asks for another, then I always say yes. I think the problem in our society these days is that most daters seem to have the attention span of May Fly! How can you REALLY tell if you like a person after one meet? In the old days you would have had a chance to know them a little bit before the date. With internet dating you have chatted, maybe talked on the phone..and the "Meet & Greet" is the first physical encounter. I don't know about the rest of the world, but I am usually a little nervous when I first meet someone, and don't always give off my best impression. So that guy isn't meeting the REAL me until I am comfortable, and that rarely happens immediately. I think we ALL need to give each other the benefit of the doubt...if you aren't sure, then go out again. Unless you find the date/experience repugnant then don't pass judgement until you have more time to get to know him.
 djc02359
Joined: 7/20/2005
Msg: 74 (view)
 
Why are people afraid to meet in person?
Posted: 1/16/2006 11:42:52 AM
I'm not saying I judge every guy like that, I'm just saying that it's one of reasons why some women do. (Once burnt twice shy) Personally, I think the guy that the Op is talking about probably is fearful. But she has to decide if she wants to have a relationship with someone who IS so fearful and distrusting.

If I believed that men couldn't be trusted then I certainly wouldn't bother continuing to look online. I think people are people. We all want someone to love, someone to love us. I am a hopeless romantic. I honestly feel that if there is a man out there somewhere for me..then I should be open to meeting him, no matter how.
 djc02359
Joined: 7/20/2005
Msg: 70 (view)
 
Why are people afraid to meet in person?
Posted: 1/16/2006 5:19:30 AM
Mark & Arri, Some married men pretend they are shy, don't post pictures and don't reveal that they have wives and families...It's happened to us and that's why we have a problem with trust. It probably doesn't happen too often in your age group, but it happens plenty in mine. I'm not sure what these men are thinking because we almost always find out right away.When you do find out they tell you that they are confused and very unhappy but can't leave for some stupid reason. (the kids, wife's unstable, or she maybe makes a mean lasagna) But the bottom line is that they are just bored and looking for sex on the side. The married men who are looking for sex take a beating here, but at LEAST they are up front about it. It's the slimeballs who try to pretend they are shy who should be shot ( or maybe castrated...
 djc02359
Joined: 7/20/2005
Msg: 25 (view)
 
Is friends first synonymous with I don't know what I want?
Posted: 1/16/2006 5:01:13 AM
I think the time element here is what the confusion may be about. When I say "friends first" I DO have a sexual/romantic interest...and I want to build the friendship until I am comfortable enough to have a sexual one. This would NOT be taking months and months...If, during that time I don't think we have a future I would be honest and tell the man that I don't think we are a good match. Maybe some other women keep the guy hanging on when they really have no desire to EVER sleep with him. I have known women who always had to keep "a spare" incase of emergencies..like that wedding they had to go to, or a date for some special event. If those are the women HarveyWall's talking about then I don't blame him. They ARE very selfish. But I think most of us just need more time than men do to decide to have sex.
 
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