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 Author Thread: CARLSBAD CASUAL LUAU PARTY! Ages 40-60ish, Sat. 10/6
 coastergal
Joined: 7/24/2005
Msg: 3 (view)
 
CARLSBAD CASUAL LUAU PARTY! Ages 40-60ish, Sat. 10/6
Posted: 9/15/2012 8:54:45 PM
Yeah! Something in the area! ;-)
 Coastergal
Joined: 7/24/2005
Msg: 2 (view)
 
Oceanside - Wed., Dec. 14, 2011 7PM - Rookies Sports Bar PHOTOS
Posted: 12/20/2011 11:02:07 PM
Looks like a fun time! I wish I could have made it over there! It's not often that there's actually a function close to north county!!!!!!
 coastergal
Joined: 7/24/2005
Msg: 26 (view)
 
POF Halloween party
Posted: 10/28/2009 9:36:59 PM
I haven't dressed up in years! I'm gonna this year. I'll post a pic when I figure it out! LOL

I'm working on Halloween at a lil bar in Vista. We're having spooky treats and a halloween contest! If anyone's interested shoot me an E-mail and I'll give you the name and address for a 'Spooktacular' time!
 coastergal
Joined: 7/24/2005
Msg: 19 (view)
 
She doesn't wish to be seen in public with me..
Posted: 10/28/2009 9:33:43 PM
I have a silly question..... What race is she?

-She might be married
-She might be insecure

Have you asked her about it?
 coastergal
Joined: 7/24/2005
Msg: 3 (view)
 
Is he stringing me along or is this goodbye? Or am I the ONE.
Posted: 10/18/2009 11:19:10 AM
Wow, I'm as confused as you are. It's a very touching and hopefully, honest letter. I don't understand why he started dating other women without telling you and that is not addressed..... It does sound like he's either lonely or he is realizing how special you are to him. Hopefully, he'll be able to figure it out with the help he is seeking.
 coastergal
Joined: 7/24/2005
Msg: 20 (view)
 
He can't afford to date you!
Posted: 10/18/2009 4:30:34 AM
I've never judged men on whether they take me on a Cheap date or not!
I want to have fun and fun is FREE!!!!!! You can make a walk on the beach or watching the sunset a total blast!
If she's having fun what's her problem? What kind of date is she looking for?
 coastergal
Joined: 7/24/2005
Msg: 74 (view)
 
Coupons and Dating
Posted: 10/18/2009 4:28:10 AM
I don't see anything wrong with using coupons! I mean why not buy one meal and get one free? Just as long as the server is tipped on what the total would be without the coupon! I mean they are doing their job!

Put in your profile... Let's explore my coupons! LOL

I remember going on a date with my ex and getting all excited that I had someone to SHARE my coupons with!!!

Most men I've dated have paid for our dates even when I've offered. Usually gets to the point if we go to a movie they'll let me buy the popcorn and soda which is as much as the tickets. So it washes out
 coastergal
Joined: 7/24/2005
Msg: 20 (view)
 
Thing's a woman likes for a guy to do for her?
Posted: 10/18/2009 4:23:44 AM
I miss getting a nightly foot massage!
I miss cooking with someone (not for them)
I miss someone caring that I haven't changed my oil!
I miss having someone appreciate when I do something for them.... WAAAH
 coastergal
Joined: 7/24/2005
Msg: 40 (view)
 
She brought a friend to our date..
Posted: 10/18/2009 4:21:03 AM
That was incredibly rude of her to bring someone along! (Ok, I know she asked if it was ok.... but, she KNOWS how her friend behaves!) I'm so proud of you that you left and you didn't put up with any BS!

Who knows if she is worth it or not. Invite her to go out again. (NOT a movie... you can't talk, have fun or get to know someone in a movie!) If she comes alone she's interested. If she calls you or texts before that she's bringing another friend. PASS on the date and tell her to have fun!
 coastergal
Joined: 7/24/2005
Msg: 67 (view)
 
Phone etiquette
Posted: 10/18/2009 4:17:00 AM
OMG... I can't even believe you're serious! Phone sex before you even meet in real life? I hope you know that she is really a he! LOL
If I had someone I spoke with.... never met.... try to do phone sex on the 3rd call... I'd give HIM the DIAL tone! Hmmm unless I was REALLY horny..... NOPE I'd still give him the dial tone!
 coastergal
Joined: 7/24/2005
Msg: 15 (view)
 
I don't understand, can anyone help
Posted: 9/18/2009 10:08:01 PM
You don't know her TRUE personality..... On the net you can be anything or anyone. It's all about meeting and seeing if there is a connection or not!

Let this fish go... if she doesn't bite at the next chance to meet!!!
 coastergal
Joined: 7/24/2005
Msg: 8 (view)
 
Strange situation
Posted: 9/17/2009 2:10:58 AM
UMMM WackMC.... His friend is still alive.... That's how they would RUN into eachother!
He met his LIVE friends sister at the funeral of another friend that passed away.

OP. Bottom-line she made contact- She gave you her digits and she's gone out with you. If SHE wants to let you be intimate then SHE will be intimate! As long as she's over 21... your friend should understand because I'm sure he's had a chubby for one of his friends sisters... Right?
 coastergal
Joined: 7/24/2005
Msg: 31 (view)
 
Negative Postings
Posted: 8/19/2009 3:02:30 PM
I LOVE it when their profile consists of negativity! It allows me to WEED them out really quickly!!!!! At least they aren't being fake and they are letting you know you don't want to get to know them!!!!!
 coastergal
Joined: 7/24/2005
Msg: 8 (view)
 
How to tell when he's playing you...
Posted: 8/19/2009 2:58:09 PM
Ummmmm He's hot.... Ummmm U go back to HIS place EVERY time you go out.....

You're an adult that can actually make choices in life.
1- Keep your legs together
2- Don't go back to his house

Then you won't feel like you're being used! I've never gone out with someone and had them ask for pics of my BOOBS!!!!! He probably has a nice collection of pics!
 coastergal
Joined: 7/24/2005
Msg: 21 (view)
 
Reconciliation advice
Posted: 8/19/2009 2:51:22 PM
Wowza.... she wants HER cake and she wants to eat it when SHE wants it!!!!

Maybe she is afraid YOU'll find someone that will treat you the way you should be treated. Ya'll either need to seek help or end it. You may need to stay away from eachother for a year so you can let eachother go before you can actually be friends.

If she wants to try.... she'd be trying. It's easy to jump back into bed with comfortable and you don't have to feel guilty about a one night stand!

I'm sorry I don't have the kind of advice that I'm sure you were hoping for!
 coastergal
Joined: 7/24/2005
Msg: 26 (view)
 
Does not want kids!
Posted: 8/18/2009 2:52:57 PM
Some people change their minds and some don't. I had a friend that was married for 10 years and from the beginning her husband wanted kids... she had one and didn't want anymore. In the end they divorced. I do think that it's great you can see if someone wants to have kids but, there is always a need for discussion to see how someone truly feels.
 coastergal
Joined: 7/24/2005
Msg: 3 (view)
 
why does he keeps talking about past relatinships?
Posted: 8/18/2009 2:50:16 PM
A lot of men and women do this. You have to decide if you can handle it or not. I'd think it would have dwindled down after 4 months. I dated someone that I didn't think I'd continue going out with because he kept talking about his ex and he wanted me to meet her! LOL
I told him they had a past together and we've just met so we'll either have a future and develop it or we'll be past tense. Usually when he brought her up it would be because I did something nice for him that she never did. So I didn't feel threatened. I can't pinpoint when but at some point I quit hearing about her................
 coastergal
Joined: 7/24/2005
Msg: 66 (view)
 
Venting - but would love some advice to ground me
Posted: 8/18/2009 2:44:37 PM
I can understand her not wanting to be uncomfortable in her own place...but, she could have brought up her concerns the 1st 3 times you asked! She is wanting you to protect her feelings.... She's also probably a lil jealous of your friendship. I don't understand why you haven't tried to get them all together again with your girl so that the Frosty friend could chill the heck out!
 coastergal
Joined: 7/24/2005
Msg: 11 (view)
 
I need some advice.
Posted: 7/23/2009 2:38:40 PM
What do you think you can handle? If you want to be in this lil girls life for ever then speak to the mother about it. If you just want to be in her life to keep tabs on mom then let them both go. If it will hurt you more to see the mom.... then let them both go.

Our hearts have a lot of room for love! So if you want to be there for this lil girl for the rest of your life make the commitment and figure out how to make it so the mom can't say ok then cut you out when she meets someone else. It needs to be understood that you're in it for ever. If you continue your attachment and she meets someone and they don't want you around...... You'll only be hurt more deeply if she keeps you from seeing the lil girl.
 coastergal
Joined: 7/24/2005
Msg: 20 (view)
 
need some advise, very badly heartbroken
Posted: 7/23/2009 2:28:32 PM
I'm sorry for the pain you've gone through. If you weren't able to say "I LOVE YOU" back then chances are you truly knew in your heart of hearts you didn't know if you loved him or not. If he was telling you to not get too attached and then things ended abruptly he meant what he was saying. As for head games it so sucks that men say they are great communicators, you'll always know where you stand with them...... but, they don't know where they stand themselves!

You could be feeling the way you do because of inexperience or it could be because you haven't had anyone treat you the way he treated you before. DO not compare other men to this guy! Everyone has something special about themselves. Just make sure you ditch the selfish losers!
 coastergal
Joined: 7/24/2005
Msg: 37 (view)
 
Is it actually love at first sight .. or probably just chemistry???
Posted: 7/23/2009 1:12:24 AM
I'd say it's LUST at 1st site!

I don't know that I believe in love at 1st site. I mean we can be extremely interested or attracted to someone. To me love is like a beautiful plant that you have to allow to grow and nurture while talking to it!
 coastergal
Joined: 7/24/2005
Msg: 76 (view)
 
Can Anyone Relate to Dating a Woman who is Bi-Polar?
Posted: 7/23/2009 1:10:27 AM
I've never dated a WOMAN that was Bi-polar! LOL
I did date someone that had some major issues! We always had fun together but, I couldn't quite figure out what was going on. He was taking his medication regularly then WHAM quit and became a different person! It was truly sad. You can't fix someone. All I could do was be there for him and back off of a relationship. He later had a breakdown and kindof checked out for a while. Wouldn't even leave his place. I'd bring food and drop it off to make sure he'd eat.

I didn't see anything specific in the beginning because he was taking medication. (I didn't know he was on meds)
 coastergal
Joined: 7/24/2005
Msg: 12 (view)
 
What is the meaning behind a kiss?
Posted: 7/23/2009 12:40:44 AM
She may have wanted to kiss you to see if there was anything still there. A kiss can either bring passion or whelp, let ya know that there is nothing.

Do NOT tell her you're inlove with her.... Be honest and let her know that you'd like to take her on a date. See how she replies. She may have put you in the friend zone.
 coastergal
Joined: 7/24/2005
Msg: 25 (view)
 
Things you experienced in your childhood that made you a better other half
Posted: 7/23/2009 12:37:01 AM
My parents were divorced before I could even speak. I'm thankful for that! My oldest sister is sooo screwed up and bitter! I was blessed enough to have wonderful grandparents and I was my grandfathers lil shadow. He farmed cattle and was an amazing man. Everyone in town respected and loved him. He taught me so much about life and love. He taught me it was better to give then receive and to see the joy that giving can bring to others.

My mom re-married when I was ten. Although they didn't work out we would have never moved to a new city. I joined a softball team and was very passionate about playing. It gave me joy and made me feel accomplished. I'll admit I craved the kuddos that I received.
 coastergal
Joined: 7/24/2005
Msg: 45 (view)
 
What makes you Californian?
Posted: 7/23/2009 12:31:18 AM
I grew up in the midwest........ my dad always said California was the land of fruits N nuts! HMMMM am I now the fruit or the nut? LOLI love the Climate and truly feel we are paying for the sunshine! One thing I noticed when I re-located to Cali was how laid back everyone was. Constantly hearing "NO worries"! People taking off to go surfing instead of working on a gorgeous day!

I love the fact if I want to see or hear the ocean it's not far away! If I want to go to the dessert it's not far away! If I want to see snow during the winter I can go to Big Bear... It's not that far away! I just wish dating was as easy as it was in Texas... OUT HERE!!! ARGH
 coastergal
Joined: 7/24/2005
Msg: 8 (view)
 
How far to you go in your search?
Posted: 7/19/2009 2:12:13 PM
LOL I can go outside if 10 miles! LOL I'm not interested in long distance either. To hard emotionally!
 coastergal
Joined: 7/24/2005
Msg: 9 (view)
 
Paralyzed
Posted: 7/19/2009 2:10:42 PM
Pretend you're not paralyzed and READ your profile? I'm truly sorry for you that you had an accident. You need to let your personality come out in your profile not throw it in women's faces. It's hard for everyone to find a great relationship, if it were easy no one would be single!
 coastergal
Joined: 7/24/2005
Msg: 12 (view)
 
Being a giver, having hard time accepting gifts from others
Posted: 7/17/2009 5:58:44 PM
There are givers and takers in this world. Two givers can be amazing together! OK so you can't GIVE what you want to give right now... but, is that the type of woman you really want? Everything you're talking about has to do with money. Can't you find a different way to give? I had someone give me a rock...........it meant more to me then flowers that will die ever could. It meant more because he went back to the beach that we had walked on and looked for the rock I had picked up and we talked about it.... joked about it then I put the rock down and we continued our date. A week later he gives me the rock..... said he went back to the beach for 2 days searching in the same spot cuz he knew it was to heavy to wash away.

As far as paying... you need to know that you just can't pay right now. In the future this economy will turn around. You're not inadequet if someone wants to buy you something or take you somewhere. Just don't be a user/loser! If a woman is offering I'm guessing she's really digging you and you're already giving her something that means more then the trip!
 coastergal
Joined: 7/24/2005
Msg: 40 (view)
 
stood up
Posted: 7/17/2009 5:50:57 PM
1. Depends on if you've spoken to him on the phone to confirm if he's coming or not. (30 min)
2. Did you have his cell to call him while you were waiting?
3. Depends- One you're assuming he's sane! LOL (jk) Who knows maybe he went to the wrong location to a restaurant with the same name. Maybe he got hit by a bus. Maybe he chickened out when he saw you because he wasn't worthy!

I'm sorry that you got stood up!
 coastergal
Joined: 7/24/2005
Msg: 21 (view)
 
Should I keep her as a friend?
Posted: 7/17/2009 5:47:10 PM
If you can't handle it then remove yourself and don't be friends.
You have to take care of yourself. She's basically put it out there for you letting you know that she doesn't have the same feelings for you. At least she isn't leading you on and she's an honest gal! Kudos for that. I'm sorry for you because it's hard when we care more for someone then they care for us. You never know though... If you're able to maintain a friendship at some point she may have a friend that you need to meet!

Best of luck to ya!
 coastergal
Joined: 7/24/2005
Msg: 73 (view)
 
A story I thought I'd share
Posted: 7/17/2009 5:39:44 PM
LMFAO!!! I can't believe you said that to her son but, HOPEFULLY, it will make an impression on her! My goodness! People are so crazy these days! Why on earth would she bring her child on a 1st meeting? This poor kid probably sees WAY too much! I ADORE kids but, don't want to meet them until I know I'm in a serious relationship. Kids don't need to have people coming in and out of their lives and shouldn't be part of their parents drama!

It's one thing if you read in her profile that she had a child but, for her to not state it.... means she's a liar!!!! Run Forest Run!!!
 coastergal
Joined: 7/24/2005
Msg: 18 (view)
 
Help
Posted: 7/8/2009 2:02:37 AM
It's hard to say without any examples. You may feel there was a connection but, are you reading the right body language/ eye signals to see that the girls feeling the same?

1. Make sure you get her to talk about herself. Don't go on and on about yourself.
2. Watch her body signals- Legs towards you shows interest- away shows not too interested.
If she leans in to hear you- touches you on the arm, hand , back, leg while laughing (she might be interested)

Just be yourself don't put pressure on yourself!
 coastergal
Joined: 7/24/2005
Msg: 12 (view)
 
3min phone call...then get hanged up on?
Posted: 7/7/2009 6:48:27 PM
LMFAO.... sounds like you got a CRAZY!!!!! NO there is no new 3 min rule! Just a bunch of weirdo's! Sorry she hung up on ya!!!
 coastergal
Joined: 7/24/2005
Msg: 20 (view)
 
Why do guys pick fights?
Posted: 7/7/2009 6:46:36 PM
I wish I knew!!!! Usually when a guy picks a fight it has to do with a woman. Another guy either looked at her or said something to her! Sometimes it's racial. It's always an idiot picking the fight though!!!! Sorry it happens to you!
 coastergal
Joined: 7/24/2005
Msg: 7 (view)
 
How many dates before you can put your arm around a woman?
Posted: 7/7/2009 6:43:15 PM
I think it's all about body language. Some women like to be touched and some don't. I don't want someone to put their arm around me if I'm not ready.... but, I have to say if I am I don't appear to be stung by a wasp! Some things happen naturally like walking side by side and somehow your hands meet and then you're holding hands! Sometimes the hands NEVER meet!
 coastergal
Joined: 7/24/2005
Msg: 12 (view)
 
Why doesnt he wanna meet me?
Posted: 7/7/2009 4:55:38 PM
He's great on the phone and NOT at all who he's been pretending to be!

I've found that you can have such a connection on the phone and then have NOTHING when you meet! Tell him that it's put up or shut up time! Ya'll need to meet. Nervous? why does he have something to hide? Like he doesn't look anything like his pics? He puts his pants on the same way you do! I had a guy REALLY nervous to meet me. Whelp, didn't look anything like his pic and had brown teeth. Nice guy but wasn't attracted at all when we met!

I met another guy that LOOKED NOTHING like his pics! It ended up it was a picture of his friend! It wasn't even him! I dated him for a few months but, I'd go home and look at the pic. I kept thinking.. his eyes are different, his nose is bigger... So he started out as a liar!!!
 coastergal
Joined: 7/24/2005
Msg: 15 (view)
 
In your opinion, what should I do?
Posted: 7/7/2009 4:44:35 PM
Whelp, you're 41 and you've been dating someone for SEVERAL years. Yet you're on a dating site looking for that 1st date. Man up and break up! If ya'll don't want more then why are you together?
 coastergal
Joined: 7/24/2005
Msg: 11 (view)
 
is nerdy a bad thing??
Posted: 7/7/2009 4:42:09 PM
I'm sure there is a woman out there that would love a nerdy boy! If you're always working on computers or drawing... how are you going to meet the nerdy lovers? It sounds like you're in the same category of a work-o-holic a lot of women steer clear of them as well!
 coastergal
Joined: 7/24/2005
Msg: 11 (view)
 
a very confusing girl to date...I'm lost.
Posted: 7/7/2009 4:39:14 PM
You're questioning this for a reason. You're not following your gut on this! If she's lied about little things then you know she'll lie about big things! Quit paying for her trips! Tell her you had some unexpected expenses and see if she sticks around! If she can't pay her share on these trips... and disappears then you have your answer! But, something tells me you're afraid of your answer!!!!
 coastergal
Joined: 7/24/2005
Msg: 10 (view)
 
How Can The Good Come Come First??
Posted: 7/7/2009 4:35:42 PM
Whelp, it sounds like you're not very secure about yourself. You look adorable. Whey don't you go online and buy some books on dating. It's all in how you carry yourself. You may not even realize that some girls are into you and you may have put them in the friendzone that you're now stuck in!!!! You have to work on yourself and your confidence! Flirt, learn to read body language!
 coastergal
Joined: 7/24/2005
Msg: 3 (view)
 
Older men for the younger women
Posted: 7/7/2009 4:28:48 PM
I tend to date younger guys. They don't have as much baggage and seem to have more fun and not set in their ways. I've gone out with a couple of guys in their 50's and recently one that was 15 years older. I have to admit we had an awesome time and lot's of fun. He's a wonderful man. He's scared to death because he had so much fun! Not all men that are older have their shyt together! In this economy anyone is lucky to have it together! So I think I'm back on the fence! LOL
 coastergal
Joined: 7/24/2005
Msg: 169 (view)
 
What a Dirt Bag!!!!!
Posted: 7/2/2009 1:07:11 AM
Wowza! That's too weird! Maybe he was wanting to make you jealous!!! At least he didn't lie and say it was just a friend and he was hoping to bump into you!!!!
 coastergal
Joined: 7/24/2005
Msg: 34 (view)
 
is it ok to continue a relationship when i know i don't love?
Posted: 7/2/2009 1:01:55 AM
You need to have a conversation with her. Let her know that you don't want to be in an exclusive relationship with her. Explain somehow the relationship has turned to sexual for you. She will either be crushed or let you know she wants to be your F-buddy!

I would hope that if I were dating someone they would break up with me vs keep dating me/sleeping with me.
 coastergal
Joined: 7/24/2005
Msg: 19 (view)
 
So let's say she rejects you..
Posted: 7/1/2009 11:57:10 PM
Don't continue to flirt. Unless she initiates some flirting. Don't ignore her. Just smile say "hi" but don't make it a point to be directly around her. Be cordial!
 coastergal
Joined: 7/24/2005
Msg: 14 (view)
 
opinions needed plans broken
Posted: 7/1/2009 11:54:56 PM
Call her next Tuesday or Wednesday and ask her out for for Fri or Sat. If she turns you down then it may be that she's not interested. She may have wanted to make sure she had something going on for the 4th.
 coastergal
Joined: 7/24/2005
Msg: 21 (view)
 
Things getting stale?
Posted: 7/1/2009 11:50:43 PM
Don't play games. Call her.. don't text and set up an actual date! This is a dating site not a text/im chat site!
 coastergal
Joined: 7/24/2005
Msg: 3 (view)
 
Signed Away My Life
Posted: 7/1/2009 11:49:31 PM
Ummmm It totally depends on the man and the conversation!

-E-mail / IM someone u don't know. They just bought something big that they'll be paying for forever!

--Someone you know well and you're having pillow talk... UM if ya aren't married and there is no pre-nup then I'd think they bought something too!

-
 coastergal
Joined: 7/24/2005
Msg: 9 (view)
 
what do I do?
Posted: 7/1/2009 11:43:46 PM
She definitely has ISSUES alright! You've let her in over and over only to be hurt. She isn't going to change. She is who she is and it appears she's a fricken flake! RUN Forest run!!!! With friends like this... who needs it? I wouldn't keep someone in my life that did that over and over and hurt me over and over! I'd severe all ties and NOT give her the time of day if I saw her again! (wowza.. I recon I'm harsh!!!)
 coastergal
Joined: 7/24/2005
Msg: 5 (view)
 
Do you think I'm being dishonest?
Posted: 7/1/2009 11:06:10 PM
You're trying to weed out? That just seems weird. Honestly, you should leave that one and post a new one as well. A woman that likes some meat on her man might be upset with ya!!! ;-)
 coastergal
Joined: 7/24/2005
Msg: 5 (view)
 
Am I being to harsh? Divorced vs. Separated
Posted: 7/1/2009 11:01:46 PM
I don't think you're being too sensitive. Divorced has a finality about it. Separated still has A LOT of unfinished business to deal with!!!! I dated one man that wasn't divorced. He would stop by to pick up his son and he'd here his soon to be ex say. "Come in the bathroom I'm giving him a bath" When he'd walk in SHE'D be in the bath with her son and invite him to join them! She'd ask for sex because they were AFTER ALL still married! I felt like a counselor instead of a girlfriend! So ummmmmm I'll stick to truly single or divorced men! I also believe stated divorced when only separated is a lie. Just because someone feels divorced doesn't make it legal!!!!
 
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