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 Author Thread: How Would You Fix CA?
 KAKI3152
Joined: 5/24/2008
Msg: 285 (view)
 
How Would You Fix CA?
Posted: 1/16/2013 7:03:45 AM
"Fortunately, as a Republican and 11th generation American (including colonial time), I'm none of the above."

Well, if we had royalty in this great nation, you would surely be a prince. Since I'm only a second generation American, I have to defer to your inherited status.

It does seem that the Republican label in California has dwindled as of late. Perhaps, if you could convince the population of the Republican plan for the future, there would a resurgence in the Republican party. Sadly, I don't see this happening soon.
 KAKI3152
Joined: 5/24/2008
Msg: 770 (view)
 
Have all the really older guys given up?
Posted: 1/12/2013 1:40:26 PM
I guess Im getting there...This woman friend told me "I guess you' re never getting married!" This from a woman with two failed marriages. In the meantime, she's both bitter and resentful of men.

Put it this way, no way in hell am I going to allow my retirement savings to be jeopardized so I guess marriage in California is out of the question.
 KAKI3152
Joined: 5/24/2008
Msg: 121 (view)
 
angry profiles..would you date them?
Posted: 1/11/2013 5:13:34 PM
Lots of negative ads and they're all funny to read. Does not make me prone to go out with them

In my dating life (last 8 years), the most negative date(s) I ever had was someone who contacted me and did not have a negative profile. It wasn't until I met her that I realized that this poor woman was destined to be single for the rest of her life. She was in her 40s, not unattractive but entirely full of herself and with a very negative opinion of men. Thank God I only suffered through three dates before I decided not to see her again.

You actually have to meet someone to see how they are in public. Some women (and men) come across as dark ot moody in their profiles but are actually intelligent and funny in person.
 KAKI3152
Joined: 5/24/2008
Msg: 216 (view)
 
Dating after 45...
Posted: 1/11/2013 5:01:34 PM
I'd go young, but's there's nothing to talk about afterwards since they never saw the same TV shows.
Annnddd I'm not fond of tatoos. I've seen some way butt ugly tramp stamps here in Cali.
 KAKI3152
Joined: 5/24/2008
Msg: 105 (view)
 
Dating Out of Your League
Posted: 1/4/2013 6:10:32 AM
Yes, we have gotten far from the "dating out of our league" initail thread. The thread has been hijacked by certain whiners who constantly complain about the current state of affairs. Wake up, unless you can mobilize a majority of the populace to hew to your beliefs, you are S..t out of luck.

I accept that there are illegal immigrants all around me in California. And you know what, I don't give a damn. I'm not competing for the jobs an illegal immigrant will take. That's why I went to college and earned several degrees.
In the town I live in, on the beautiful Central Coast of California, there is a huge Latino majority. The main job market around here is agriculture, with some high tech relating to Vandenberg AFB. Therefore, there are plenty of illegals field hand workers who work like dogs. The illegal immigrant is the n----- of California, who works the shit jobs no one wants to do.
 KAKI3152
Joined: 5/24/2008
Msg: 26 (view)
 
Higher expectations
Posted: 12/31/2012 7:45:03 AM
Hey, it's all the will of God. He controls our every action,right? Gun massacres and all.

This is why I shy away from any profiles profuse with religious statements.
 KAKI3152
Joined: 5/24/2008
Msg: 96 (view)
 
Dating Out of Your League
Posted: 12/28/2012 7:33:13 AM
Wow, some harsh words being thrown around.

Talk about dating out of your league, I have an anecdote . Five years I was dating a white woman, over 45, whom I had known for some twenty years. We had been friends in Jnr Collge though we had not dated, and we re-met at a local gym. After a few dates, her attitude started becoming noticeable until she broke up with me through E-mail. I was flabbergasted, since I had known her for a long time and considered her a friend. Clearly, she thought that I was not in her league. Fine, I moved on.
A month ago, I ran accross her again (did not recognize her at first) and she was overly friendly. In the meantime, her looks had faded. Without going into detail, she looked now like what she was, a woman in her fifties, with the appropriate facial wrinkles, and other noticeable factors that had finally come to play. She reminded me of the old joke "Why are blondes like cow pies? Because the older they get, the easier they are to pick up." Needless to say, I was not interested in any further action with her and she noted my cool reaction to seeing her. As she promptly left, I reflected, what goes around, comes around. Not only did I not consider her a friend, just seeing her reminded me of all the pain she had brought into my life those years ago. I hope I don't run into her for another five years.
 KAKI3152
Joined: 5/24/2008
Msg: 6 (view)
 
Bored on POF? Rate Images!
Posted: 12/28/2012 7:15:28 AM
Love the one where a woman has multiple pictues of herself with other people so you have to guess who she is based on her description. Or the far.far away shots that show no detail.
 kaki3152
Joined: 5/24/2008
Msg: 36 (view)
 
Sex on the 3rd date?
Posted: 12/9/2012 2:05:32 PM
Sex on the third date. Yes, it has happened, though not recently.
If you meet someone who also wants to have sex with you, in my experience, it will usually happen.

Just remembered my ex. First four years all the sex I wanted. Quote: " I'll never turn you down for sex" Last three years less and less until nothing. Then, sporadic sex when she got the "itch" , "Would you like to open a bottle of wine,dear",etc. Anyways, we never got married, but it was fun while it lasted.
 kaki3152
Joined: 5/24/2008
Msg: 104 (view)
 
Are we getting harder as we get older?
Posted: 12/9/2012 1:57:29 PM
That's it. All these experiences are steeling my resolve to stop dating.

Unfortunately, the old saying still holds true "Abstinence is its own punishment". Just celebrated a birthday,further along in my fifties, so maybe it's time to re-evaluate what I want out of future relationships. Not that I have had a large success on POF, so maybe it's all for the better.
 kaki3152
Joined: 5/24/2008
Msg: 45 (view)
 
Predjudice against hiring the 'mature' person
Posted: 12/2/2012 10:50:17 AM
I hate to say this but the only thing that keeps me sleeping at nights is the knowledge that my 401K/small pension remains untouched. After working in Aerospace for 23 years, I was released three years ago at age 54. Since then, the extended unemployment, along with part time work (and savings) have prevented me from touching my funds. The only concession, so to speak, is that I'm using an IRA fund to pay for my health insurance.
I've noticed that the economy is starting to pick up in my neck of the woods, though I'm loath to go into Aerospace again (did I mention I hated my job).
Hopefully things will pick up, but the "high" salaries of yesteryear will remain a memory.
 kaki3152
Joined: 5/24/2008
Msg: 25 (view)
 
getting girls to actually go out on a date
Posted: 12/2/2012 10:39:20 AM
Keep trawling and something will turn up in your net. After all, it is a FREE dating site, so what do you expect?
I've met women, dated some and had a short term relationship with a travelling nurse who utterly charming.
 kaki3152
Joined: 5/24/2008
Msg: 28 (view)
 
Courting?? does it exist??
Posted: 11/27/2012 6:18:41 AM
I used to court , nowaday I settle for common courtesy. I used to write love poems and send roses on a regular basis.
When we broke up seven years later, one of her remonstrations was "You don't write love poems anymore!" Oh well.
 kaki3152
Joined: 5/24/2008
Msg: 37 (view)
 
Women and Sex
Posted: 7/16/2012 9:16:03 PM
My advice is to ignore anything people say to you and decide for yourself. If you choose to have sex with someone because you like him, practice safe sex, let him know what the conditions are and be courteous to others.

Above don't listen to all the crap about being labeled a 'harlot". Do what makes you happy
 kaki3152
Joined: 5/24/2008
Msg: 29 (view)
 
What do You do on a Bad Date?
Posted: 7/16/2012 9:07:19 PM
It's funny isn't it. One lady I briefly dated was very cold after we broke up (she broke it off). After a year of seeing me dancing with other women and bringing dates to the local pub, she is now cordial and always makes it a point to say hi.
 KAKI3152
Joined: 5/24/2008
Msg: 50 (view)
 
Would you date someone who admitted to previous affairs
Posted: 7/16/2012 5:16:02 AM
Ask me no questions...I'll tell you no lies.

I never ask. I just look for the kinship we both have in common. Why should I be concerned about a person's past mistakes?
 KAKI3152
Joined: 5/24/2008
Msg: 16 (view)
 
How Far Would You travel to meet someone?
Posted: 7/13/2012 10:55:35 AM
"God knows why but i put up with that for about a year.. Never again"

I did something similar but only for amonth before I blew up and told her off.
 KAKI3152
Joined: 5/24/2008
Msg: 28 (view)
 
Insults as an Opener.
Posted: 7/13/2012 10:43:19 AM
I think a well said put down or snide remark can bring some people down to size. Way too many women convince themselves their beauty or imagined beauty allows them to get away with total rudeness. Case in point.
I live close to Santa Barbara, CA which is replete with glossy, beautiful people. Upon arriving at a Pastry shop, I saw a older, pretty woman with her hands full going for the door. I opened the door for her and let her pass. To my surprise, she said nothing but chose to completely ignore me. So I said very loudly "You're welcome!" She slightly stumbled, made a grunt, and looked surprised. Later, she was looking at me so I made a moue and she looked away quickly. It's all so amusing.
 KAKI3152
Joined: 5/24/2008
Msg: 8 (view)
 
Pictures of your Ex
Posted: 7/12/2012 7:10:00 AM
A picture is just a picture... a remembrance of past events..If someone is bothered by a picture then they have serious emotional issues.
 kaki3152
Joined: 5/24/2008
Msg: 182 (view)
 
Statements in profiles that make you say NEXT!
Posted: 7/12/2012 6:41:47 AM
Pictures of MULTIPLE women in each picture.

Ok-pet peeve of the week. Women who have one poor photograph of themselves and seven photos with themselves and multiple friends. Its nice to know that you have friends but there not the ones I will be dating.

You should have one good full face photo.
 KAKI3152
Joined: 5/24/2008
Msg: 374 (view)
 
Should men color the gray
Posted: 7/6/2012 5:55:17 PM
I'm not giving up my curly hair if I can help it. Still mostly black though with stands of white, which I like sin ce it gives me veritas. If I was going bald, I'd think about shaving it, but so far, so good.
 KAKI3152
Joined: 5/24/2008
Msg: 13 (view)
 
How Far Would You travel to meet someone?
Posted: 7/6/2012 5:51:21 PM
Well, to tell the truth, I have had relationships with women who lived in other states and other countries.
I met a Brazilian woman in the US and visted her in Brazil after she moved back. Luckily, I went to HS in Brazil so I speak Brazilian Portuguese fluently. We're still good friends.

I also (in my 30s) dated a woman in Salt Lake City whom I met on a cruise. She was gorgeous, educated, originally from New Zealand and very sensual We had a great relationship I thought until one day she called me up in Santa Barbara and told me she was in love with someone else. She called me a month later when he dumped her but by then I was prepared to say "Adios".

So now being single and having to find dates, I find that I'm not willing to travel that much...
 kaki3152
Joined: 5/24/2008
Msg: 4 (view)
 
Do u dress up or dress down on a first meetup?
Posted: 7/5/2012 7:40:57 AM
I think best foot forward is the way to go. When I go on a first date, I have dress nicely with a nice shirt, nice pants and a good pair of shoes. I do also look at my date to see how she is "put together". You can never take back a first impression.
 KAKI3152
Joined: 5/24/2008
Msg: 91 (view)
 
Living on a shoestring budget
Posted: 7/2/2012 1:24:52 PM
I have to agree. If initiating a long term relationship means giving up my comfortable life style, Im not going to do it.
There is a saying in Spanish "Mejor solo que mal acompañado" or better alone than with an undesirable companion.
There a similar one in English "Marry in haste, repent in leisure"

I've seen too many of my friends who ended up marrying a woman who made their life hell and it took them thousands of dollars to extricate themselves. Marriage in California is a financial morass which can and will empty your savings. I have to retain my savings so I can breathe easier about an uncertain future, espcecially now that I'm in my 50s.


Perhaps I will just "rent" with an option to buy from now on:-)
 KAKI3152
Joined: 5/24/2008
Msg: 50 (view)
 
Interracial Dating
Posted: 7/2/2012 1:12:44 PM
Look, this is the way I look at it. As a dark skinned (moreno) Latino, I find that some women are attracted to me and others are not. Not much I can do about it...Why worry about it? I tend to go with the ones that find me attractive and vice versa and ignore the others. Not going to write a long rant about, some people tend to take rejection personally.
 KAKI3152
Joined: 5/24/2008
Msg: 25 (view)
 
Have never met anyone on this site :(
Posted: 6/30/2012 7:08:37 PM
It's catchy I will say that...I'm sure that it appeals to some.

I'm thinking about changing mine ...

I've met a few people on POF, have a date next week with one and met another woman through another dating site.
Life is good.
 kaki3152
Joined: 5/24/2008
Msg: 1 (view)
 
What do You do on a Bad Date?
Posted: 6/26/2012 6:50:57 AM
So, looking through all these foibles and problems of the mature single , I 'd thought I'd throw this one out.

What kind of behavior should you engage in when you realize the date is a total bust? By this, should you attempt to keep a facade of seeming interest or should you just pull the plug immediately. I've been on dates when my date was just plain rude from the beginning,while I just sat there and tried to make pleasant comversation. Sample lines:

"You're short" --- This was from a woman who was a inch shorter than me. It was obvious I wasn't her type but she wasn't exactly a prime catch. This was my first POF date. She was half an hour late, in a bad mood and made no offer to pay for anything. The only smile I saw was on her profile.

"I really don't think this will work out" --It's our first date, if it's not going to work out I think I can tell without you stating the obvious. You may think you're a great catch but I DO have some input into this.

"you're lucky I date short men" --This from someone slightly over 5 ' and not too attractive. Quick as a flash , I thought "Gee, you're lucky I date unattractive women." This was one time I kept quiet.

And so the litany goes on. As I've gotten older, I find that my "niceness" is wearing thin. I dislike rude behavior but I find myself tempted to fight fire with fire.

My question is whether I should just be rude in return or try to keep the social facade up until the dinner or date is over. I'm not a bolter.
 kaki3152
Joined: 5/24/2008
Msg: 172 (view)
 
Single (never married at all) men over 45
Posted: 6/26/2012 6:24:39 AM
Amen,brother.

There are so many people who will jump to conclusions based on their own life history when they fail to realize that their limited experience does not entail "wordly wisdom". God save you if happen to invoke their wrath.

IN truth, I find that there are both very bitter (and sometimes ignorant) women and men out there and I choose not to associate with them. With men its easy to pick them out. With women,once the facade crumbles, it's easy to see the underlying personality.

Also now that I'm in my 50s, its not easy to put up with demanding uncompromising women (my way or the highway) .
 KAKI3152
Joined: 5/24/2008
Msg: 7 (view)
 
How Far Would You travel to meet someone?
Posted: 6/24/2012 3:43:50 PM
Thanks to all for the replies. Travelling 45 miles one way is not too bad where I live. I just don't want to do those
1 1/2 hour oneway treks. This is restricting, I know and the perfect fish for me may live 1 hour or more away.

Nowaday with cellular phones, Web mail and the like you can get to know people who live far far away. One E-mail I had with a comely lass finally petered out when she wanted to fly to Vancouver Canada fo a quick weekend. When I hesitated she stopped writing.oh well.
 KAKI3152
Joined: 5/24/2008
Msg: 378 (view)
 
worst date u went on
Posted: 6/22/2012 11:33:02 AM
The worst date I have ever been on…. Gee, there have been so many that it’s hard to pick a single one
There was the German dentist who lived in a filthy house and had her three dogs go poo-poo in the house. By the way, her office is spotless.She would pick up the droppings and throw them over the side of her house (she lives on the side of a cliff in a very nice 4 bedroom house by herself). She was verruckt (crazy) as the Germans say. One of her statements was “ I’d rather see a dead man by the side of the road than a dead dog”. She loves animals and hates men. I see her around from time to time but we don’t talk.
Then there are those situations which are downright dangerous like the woman who grabbed the steering wheel while I was driving at 60 mph. Needless to say, I did not go out with her again. About six months after this incident (and yes, there was alcohol involved), I saw her in a local nightclub and acted like I did not recognize her. I know a walking disaster when I see one.
Then there was the woman from class (local college) who freaked out at a drive inn(she started sobbing and crying) half way through the date. She then told me how she had found her dad hanging in a closet when she was twelve. This was after some mild make out. I took her home posthaste. The next week after that she asked me when we were going out again. I just smiled…
But the best overall of all bad date stories involves the woman who contacted me through Match some five years ago back when I was a member. She was in her 40s, long blond hair , blue eyed with a Master’s in Biology from a local university. She was working in a local winery and had just bought a house. The entire episode was not without humor. I call it “The Clip”.
Our first date was inconsequential. We met in a wine bar that is half an hour away and shared some wine while talking about ourselves. She was amazed that I had bought a bottle of wine from the winery she worked at and quizzed me if I knew where she worked, hinting that I had done a internet search on her. We made a date for next week.
The next date was the first inkling that all was not kosher. I made a reservation at a nice restaurant for 9:00. By 9:30 I was beginning to get worried. The restaurant was filling up fast and there was line waiting outside. My waiter kept eyeing the table and asking me if everything was all right. Finally at 9:40, my date shows up. I’m not that anal about time,especially with women, but this was ridiculous. My date come in, sees me and also sees another couple she know. She then has a 5 minute conversation with this couple before coming over to my table. I was seething by now but managed to avoid any outside indication. She made a flippant apology about being late. The dinner proceeded while she told me that she did not believe we had much of a chance but she was willing to go out. I should have left but we made another date for the week after.
The third date I went to where she lived. She showed me her home which had a lot of books. I started looking at her books, to which she accused me of snooping. I was amazed but again managed to hold my mouth shut. She was installing a fence so she asked me if I could do some digging. For the next two hours, I dug and helped her install the fence while she told me everything I was doing wrong in the fence installation. At 1200 we finally stopped working and went wine tastng at the winery she worked at. We got tipsy while she proceeded to tell me about all the men who had done her wrong. While she was atractive, she was somewhat unkempt and had gnarled finger from hard work. We had dinner. Of course, I paid for everything. We made out some at her place before I left.

Since we had exchanged E-mails we started E-mailing . During one of these E-mails, I sent her a comedic clip that another ex-girlfriend had sent me some time ago. The clip was a advertisement for instant soup. The clip started out with a couple in the aftermath of love making. The man smiles and appears to fall asleep, while the woman goes towards a microwave. The microwave counts 2 seconds, one second and then pings it’s finished. The woman takes the instant soup and proceeds to eat it while looking pensive. I thought it was a crackup,so I sent it to my “friend”. Well, I received a message right away saying that she did not find any humor in this clip and thought it just represented men’s total disregard of a woman’s need. I told her it was sent to me by a woman so perhaps she was taking this way too personally. This set off a verbal volcano about how men just did not care and used women for their own purposes. This went on and on. I seem to remember asking her to “Lighten up” which did nothing to stem the verbal tirade that was flooding my in box.
We finally (after a week) agreed to go out for one more date. There was a Brazilian band playing at a local bar so we agreed to meet there. She showed up almost on time and we danced for a while. We both could not speak much because the noise was so loud. Finally there was an intermission so we went outside to cool off. She then brought up the video clip argument again. By now, I was tired of her and did not say much. There was a guy standing by smoking and he said “ Hey,don’t argue with them.”meaning women. She stopped talking, looked at him, looked at me and turned around and went straight to her car. She drove away, while I just looked on.

The next day I had an E-mail saying that when she heard this other guy talk she just couldnt handle the stress so she had to leave right away. No good bye,nothing. She said that perhaps we were not suited for each other. I replied “we’re like oil and water.”
This was THE WORST DATE[S] EXPEREINCE I EVER HAVE HAD. I could not believe how rude this woman was and how much total disregard she had for her date [me]. She made no attempt to be civil, was sullen, moody and pretentious. She kept talking about how close she was to her doctorate. She was well educated but totally bitter. It was like a bad taste in my mouth, Blechhhh….
 kaki3152
Joined: 5/24/2008
Msg: 7 (view)
 
Middle aged man, new Camaro
Posted: 6/22/2012 6:18:38 AM
Shoot buy a car because you like to drive it. I bought a used Porsche Boxster three years ago and have never regretted it. Some high maintenance bills but it drives like a dream.
 kaki3152
Joined: 5/24/2008
Msg: 1 (view)
 
How Far Would You travel to meet someone?
Posted: 6/22/2012 6:13:31 AM
I've thought about this in all the years I've lived in California (30+).
Most towns/cities are a drive on the freeway. I've met women who live in the neighborhood and I've dated women who lived 45 minutes away.

Over the years I 've contacted/been contacted by women who lived three or more hours away. I've never pursued these relationships, though I've often wondered how other people feel about this.
 kaki3152
Joined: 5/24/2008
Msg: 56 (view)
 
Repetitive lines you see in profiles
Posted: 6/22/2012 6:05:45 AM
Let's see...

"Looking for my last first kiss"---Overdone

"walks on the beach"-- natch, this is So Cal
 KAKI3152
Joined: 5/24/2008
Msg: 169 (view)
 
Single (never married at all) men over 45
Posted: 6/21/2012 11:25:07 AM
Ya know, I was just thinking I should have married my college GF. She was from a wealthy family, loved me and was ready to get married. Well, I didn't

Since her I've asked other women if they wanted to get married and start a family. My GF in grad school who got pregnant said she wanted a career and had me pay for half an abortion. We did not last long after that.
I met another woman in the 1990s who said I would ultimately leave her with a child to raise by herself.
Finally there was my fiancee said we would get married and have a child only to disavow everything later.

So now I don't feel I have to prove anything about why I never got married. There where women who would have married me but I did not feel we would last long.
 KAKI3152
Joined: 5/24/2008
Msg: 170 (view)
 
How many dates have you actually been on from POF?
Posted: 6/21/2012 11:08:43 AM
I've actually had about 4-5 dates and plan to go on a date this Saturday with a POF.

I've had some attention from women in other states who were attractive but I'm just not going to do a long distance relationship anymore. Too expensive and there is truth in the old saw "Absence just makes the heart grow fonder of someone else"

I contacted a fair amount of women when i first joined the site,which I don't do anymore.partly because I was in other relationships and partly because I found it unfruitful.So nowadays, I peruse the profiles mainly for entertainment.
 KAKI3152
Joined: 5/24/2008
Msg: 42 (view)
 
What are your thoughts about doing background checks on potential dates?
Posted: 6/21/2012 11:00:00 AM
You know this is starting to sound like work. I date for fun and don't want to worry about someone's back ground unless i am getting very serious. I generally trust people having found out that that nut cases don't hold it together for too long. This pertains to people met in social settings (bars,single groups, chuch,etc.) whom I have found tend to be as nutty as anyone met on the Web.
 KAKI3152
Joined: 5/24/2008
Msg: 54 (view)
 
Politics and dating
Posted: 5/29/2012 6:23:16 PM
You just can't take it too seriously. If you get along in other respects,are willing to laugh about the rivalries and are intelligent enough to realize there are things that are beyond your control,then I say go for it. People who get so wrapped up into this are generally unhappy people whom you should not date anyways. This goes for both left and right extremists.
 kaki3152
Joined: 5/24/2008
Msg: 38 (view)
 
Interracial Dating
Posted: 5/27/2012 6:07:53 AM
I hate to say this but I have lived in Brasil and there is also a fair amount of racial prejudice in Brasil. Yes, there is more interacial dating and a lot of people are clearly from mixed race background, but it does exist.
"Tem gente que nao gostam de criolos ou pretos, vc tem que admitir"

Everyboday has their preference. I have lived in California for 30 years. I have met girls who liked my dark skin, others who flat out told me they did not date Latinos, and everything in between. One of my GF's mom told her that I was too swarthy. I kind liked that comment. My ex-fiancee was German-American from the Mid west and would not date blacks. One GF told me she could not marry me because her children would not be blond. My sister married a white Caucasian and has two tow heads (very blonde) and one brunette. My sister is much lighter skinned, but still ran into the situation in San Diego, where a woman asked her if those were really her children, What nerve some people have.
 KAKI3152
Joined: 5/24/2008
Msg: 10 (view)
 
Male and Female Disconnect
Posted: 5/20/2012 3:17:14 PM
"To Dream The Impossible Dream..."

Sigh, just saw "Weird Science" on TV great 80s movie. In this movie,Kelly Labrock a perfect woman, is generated by two teenage nerds using a computer program. Through her they achieve fame.

Don't Worry, be Happy and someone will pick up on your joie de vivre.
 kaki3152
Joined: 5/24/2008
Msg: 7 (view)
 
Male and Female Disconnect
Posted: 5/20/2012 5:36:36 AM
It all comes down to self. How much of your self are you willing to subordinate in order to remain in a relationship with someone else?

Most people are wrapped into their own self and don't want to "settle" for a lesser being. So they find reasons NOT to connect with others.

It's sad, singles must learn to be happy by themselves.
 KAKI3152
Joined: 5/24/2008
Msg: 83 (view)
 
Be Honest...Are You Shallow?
Posted: 5/4/2012 6:11:54 AM
Probably. I think I'm allowed that at my age. If I'm not attracted to a woman, I won't initiate contact. I have met several women through this site for first dates. One did not find me attractive (You're too short). Fine, I can accept that. As she she wasn't any great shakes either,one date was enough. Another one found me acceptable (who knows what goes through a woman's mind), so we had a date. It's probably not going any further than that.

Most women will decide pretty quickly if they find me attractive so I tend to do the same. I may be attracted to them but if a feeler goes nowhere, I just move on. Life is too short.
 kaki3152
Joined: 5/24/2008
Msg: 97 (view)
 
Whats the silliest thing you fought over when you split?
Posted: 5/1/2012 6:11:51 AM
Where to place a painting. She said it was too high ( or too low, I can't remember), I said it was too low. It was the begining of a bad weekend. Once my ex got into a tizzy, she would refuse to talk except for one syllable words.

Unfortunatley, she had the kind of personality that could turn from a reasonable woman into a harridan at a moment's notice. Single now, and enjoying it.
 kaki3152
Joined: 5/24/2008
Msg: 12 (view)
 
Words of Wisdom?
Posted: 4/27/2012 7:18:04 AM
It's not what you say that keeps a relationship intact, it's what you don't say.
Think twice about possible consequences before you open your mouth. Once words leave your lips they are never retrieved.
If something bothers you, bring it up,but choose your time carefully.
Don't think people won't cut their nose off to spite their face,happens all the time.
 kaki3152
Joined: 5/24/2008
Msg: 29 (view)
 
Why is it so hard to have a good conversation?
Posted: 4/13/2012 5:54:52 AM
Oh well, no use dwelling on situations that are out of our control.

We are all such unique creatures (both men and women) with cultivated tastes, life long aversions,family emotional baggage, etc. that as we get older it does become a unrealistic fantasy of finding a soul mate that totally satisfies.
Concentrate on what makes you happy, and keep yourself open to opportunities.

I bet we could have an intelligent conversation.:-)
 kaki3152
Joined: 5/24/2008
Msg: 28 (view)
 
Why is it so hard to have a good conversation?
Posted: 4/12/2012 9:11:51 PM
I know what you mean. There are some I should have walked away from, but I think I've learned something from every relationship I've had,whether it was a new music artist I wasn't familiar with or a shared experience that was fun (walking her dogs, going to a church service,etc.). While it may be simpler to move on if things are not "right", I usually keep on going out with that person, until events culminate and a mutual decision is made to not see each other anymore. Luckily, as I become older, my heart is (mostly) inured to emotional feelings that would have devastated me in my younger years.
 kaki3152
Joined: 5/24/2008
Msg: 120 (view)
 
When someone points out that you're old..
Posted: 4/10/2012 6:08:51 PM
I love this whole " You're Old" hangup people have. I noticed the Who (when they were touring) stopped playing "My Generation" with the infamous line " Hope I die before I get Old" :-)

Tell people you're not old you're a survivor. Luckily, I look young for my age so I don't get this question a lot.
 kaki3152
Joined: 5/24/2008
Msg: 27 (view)
 
Why is it so hard to have a good conversation?
Posted: 4/10/2012 5:53:59 PM
Well, I think no one is perfect, even those who imagine they are.Therefore, a single reason that sets my cynicism meter started is not a deal breaker. It's the cumulation of perceptions and realizations that finally tips the bucket

But aren't we getting away from the initial question which is why it is so hard to have a good conversation? Good conversations happen to me all the time, just not initally when meeting someone whom I may be interested as a partner.
And one person's intelligent conversation is an utter bore to somenone else. So we go on talking to perfect strangers, hoping for that note of friendship. It's a difficult world.
 KAKI3152
Joined: 5/24/2008
Msg: 25 (view)
 
Why is it so hard to have a good conversation?
Posted: 4/9/2012 12:59:44 PM
At the risk of putting my $0.02 in, I am quite proud to be a cynic. While it does no good to be overtly cynical in speech, it serves as a good counterwight in thought. Let's define cynicism: The propensity to distrust or find false the sincerity or goodness of human motives or intentions.
While I tend to approach relationships with overt humor and kindness, I find that thoughtful cynicism serves to keep your emotional equanimity in good balance. Thus, it serves as a valuable counterforce to raging emotion.
 KAKI3152
Joined: 5/24/2008
Msg: 177 (view)
 
How Would You Fix CA?
Posted: 2/2/2012 5:04:28 PM
I'm sorry my feeble attempt at humor was so ill received.

I'm actually just trying to defend illegal immigrants who are, after all, some of the most downtrodden people around these parts. Yes, you're correct illegal immigrants can be deported. They are not citizens and therefore have no rights. However, I postulate that even if Mitt wins, the status quo will remain the same. There are large organizations such as the ACLU that would fight mass deportations.

"The Court can overrule its own decisions and it has, many times." Yes, I would say not many, but this is quibbling

"Maybe your "projected scenario" would seem logical to "some"--although even that's doubtful--but you addressed it to us here."
Gee, one guy seemed to like some of the points. By the way, "reductio ab absurdum", is one of Schopenhauer's 38 methods of argument.
I'm not sure what you mean about trite, condescending insults? Perhaps I was taking my cue from the GOP who regularly disparages others. Do you really need me to cite some examples?

"Note the invocation of the Nazis, the barely veiled claim that hostility toward aliens who flout U.S. laws is motivated by racial prejudice, and the inclusion of Muslims to imply that the xenophobia of us slackjawed mouthbreathers isn't confined just to people from south of the border. Oh, to be so rare, so noble-minded as you! "

Didn't appreciate my humor? Sorry.
I have no idea where I got the idea that there is racial hostilty towards aliens. I can only think of personal observation, overheard comments, workplace conversations, Web content,etc...I would argue there has always been a Xenophobic vein running through American culture, especially in certain social economic circles. The GOP has always been quick to exploit this for its own purposes. And with the national election, it’s coming out.

I don't consider anyone here a mouthbreather but they are out there, I've seen them.
 KAKI3152
Joined: 5/24/2008
Msg: 173 (view)
 
How Would You Fix CA?
Posted: 2/2/2012 7:38:51 AM
I think we're getting way from the topic on this one. The idea is how to fix California.
I was a little tongue in cheek there, and received the usual smarmy reponses I envisioned. Reductio ad absurdum (Latin: "reduction to the absurd") is a form of argument in which a proposition is disproven by following its implications logically to an absurd consequence. If we take the debate on illegal immigration to its logical extremes, the scenario I projected would seem logical to some, even though it is clearly absurd.

And even I will admit illegal immigration is ONE part of the problems of this once great state. And whining over past court decisions is laughable. "Gee, I think the Dred Scott decison should not have been overturned".

But let's be clear, even if every illegal immigrant left California tommorow, the problems that California faces will not disappear.

One of the big things happening lately is political district redistricting. Finally an indenpendent comission (five Democrats, five Republicans and 4 Independents) came up a with a logical redistricting plan. The stakes are high and in my neck of the woods (SB-SLO), Sate Senator Sam Blakeslee (R-SLO) won't run in the next elections. The GOP sued and the State Supreme Courty upheld the decision by a vote of 7-0. The article points out that registered Republicans are down to 30.4% of the electorate, with Democrats at 43.6% and Independents at 21.2%.
Here's a link to the article for those interested.
>>http://www.latimes.com/news/local/la-me-cap-redistricting-20120202,0,4254194.column?page=1<<
 
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