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 Author Thread: really need everyone's help on this one...
 jrbickers123
Joined: 6/9/2008
Msg: 11 (view)
 
really need everyone's help on this one...
Posted: 4/2/2010 5:23:10 PM
if it walks like a booty call
talks like a booty call
brings you lunch at home after a year of no communication and begins sensual shoulder rubs...

its a .....duck? I think I'm right on this one...
 jrbickers123
Joined: 6/9/2008
Msg: 8 (view)
 
What fond memories do you have?
Posted: 3/27/2010 9:57:01 PM
Long term degenerative memory disorder + parkinsons later on in life. I don't have many memories that stick out, and I know for a fact I won't have many that stick out in the long run. but I have one of being on a Seattle park bench on a warm DRY fall evening watching the sunset with a gentle warm southward breeze people watching with my arm around some girl, Face and name lost with time but the overly warm happy memory is the only vivid one I have, and I'm guessing whoever this girl was she was a big part of my life.

I think of this whenever I see one of the coats I know this girl was wearing, a white knit sweater type coat.



But your question is really Pavlovian. Everyones gonna have a specific memory that triggers something fond, and no 2 people are going to have the same memory, so asking a random stranger's memory won't help with the man you seek to impress. This kind of question I'd feel would be saved for one of the most intimate of moments (but please not just before or just after sex, however many "i love yous" are said they just don't count during this time). It'd be one of those intimate cuddle moments when you know there are no walls between you and him, and to simply ask, whats his favorite memory, whats one of the things that if he were to see through his day would make him smile. And try not to ask it loaded so that his only response will be "oh uhm...thinking of you?"
 jrbickers123
Joined: 6/9/2008
Msg: 46 (view)
 
Apparently Im too hairy!
Posted: 3/26/2010 8:47:09 PM
Date more gentlemen. The only thing any lady needs to be hearing about her appearance on a date is how gorgeous she looks. And if nothing nice is to be said, then nothing should be said at all. Simple rule of treat others how you'd want to be treated, and I'd never want my date criticizing my appearance negatively.
 jrbickers123
Joined: 6/9/2008
Msg: 9 (view)
 
not interested in dating
Posted: 3/26/2010 8:38:12 PM
Hang out with him and get to be his best friend
Most guys like to go dating in the order of: 1. friendship 2. dating 3. intimacy
So it doesn't hurt to get to be good friends, just don't build yourself up for a let down if theres nothing more than friendship there, often thats the case.
 jrbickers123
Joined: 6/9/2008
Msg: 4 (view)
 
I feel intimidated, but I don't know if its justified.
Posted: 3/23/2010 1:02:34 PM
@Abbicci: thank you for the insight! That really does make a lot more sense now that I think of it. Who pays for dates, and who supports who has been just as heated a topic as religion, everyones on extreme sides of the fence with that one, that explains why an overly defensive stance on financial status comes off to me as overly aggressive. I've always felt equality on dates to diffuse that potential argument so i never really thought of it before.

~edit~ It also explains why I'm getting such incredibly opnionated and judgemental responses, both positive and negative. ~edit~


And something else it appears I've completely overlooked. Everyone elses mindset is "don't worry, theres plenty to chose from" and I'm located in a relatively small chunk of oregon, the local results for just people on POF within 50 miles is limited to a few hundred tops. I'm gonna continue using POF as my message in a bottle, not my search and rescue team.
 jrbickers123
Joined: 6/9/2008
Msg: 5 (view)
 
Why do men put pictures on the profiles with no shirts?
Posted: 3/23/2010 12:08:42 PM
to quote LoudSilence "Right, a headless torso, every thing we were dreaming of..."

actually yeah, I love greek/roman art. Just think of people who put theirs on their profiles as the cheap knock off artists :P
 jrbickers123
Joined: 6/9/2008
Msg: 1 (view)
 
I feel intimidated, but I don't know if its justified.
Posted: 3/23/2010 11:41:59 AM
I wanna just start this by saying I'm not sexist, I don't feel that women should be less successful than myself financially, Please take that into consideration reading this post :)

With the economy thing, I sure as heck am not getting as far in life as I thought I would be (at this point at least) when I was growing up. It almost makes me feel like I've failed somehow, I can support myself, I'm continuing my education, So as you can guess my future feels like a Sisyphean task however I won't give up or slow down in life.

But there are a LOT of very accomplished women in my area who seem to only show off their financial superiority in their profiles, Rarely do I see a profile have something unique to the lady as a person. Its always "I've got these degrees, these qualifications, I have a __ figure job", and then anything about them might be "I enjoy the outdoors, I enjoy movies, I enjoy cuddling, message me if you wan't to know more". and I sit back and think that the only thing I've learned from her is that she likes the same things that every other person in the world likes, and then her entire financial superiority is clearly what she wants everyone to know.

So I get the impression that since they are flaunting their success and nothing about them as a person, they Value success more than personality, and that really intimidates me into ever making contact with anyone because I feel like in comparison I have failed their standards, and that their primary concern is financial success. Being an already shy guy this is a huge obstacle for me to overcome. and so with all that being said here is my question.

What is the reason for the majority of the women I see on PoF (and I only look at the locals to my area), to be so specific and proud of their financial status, and putting so little information into who they actually are. I could care less if the person I fall in love with is below the poverty line, or the wealthiest person alive, I care about the person.

Any insight would be greatly appreciated. I don't mean to imply that the women in my area are shallow, or that they care about money than love, I'm just trying to understand this concept of, tell a total stranger your financial superiority but don't tell him anything unique to you and hope this somehow catches you the love of your life.
 jrbickers123
Joined: 6/9/2008
Msg: 10 (view)
 
Does not wanting to live with a man before marriage a deal breaker ?
Posted: 3/23/2010 10:34:03 AM
can't give you advice on that relationship, sounds like theres a lot more to it than you're putting in the post. and from you're point of view, he sounds like a**** but thats to be expected from a bias party.
however I can give you input on the whole living together thing.

Anyone who's had a bad roomate before is going to want to live with their significant other before marriage. The risks are simply too great, its not a lack of commitment. I know from first hand experience, and all of my friends can agree that it doesn't matter how close you are to someone, you or they might be driven absolutely bonkers by living together. I've seen lifelong friends who have had failed co-habitation arrangements with each other, and I've seen incredibly close couples that were your fairytale marriage story. They were each others high school sweethearts, prom dates, they had a relationship of 6+ years and then they didn't last more than half a year into living together.

Intentionally not living with a person (for any given amount of time) before marriage is no different than playing a game of russian roulette, your leaving your potential marriage up to chance rather than building it on a meaningful lasting relationship. (fyi if your reason for no living together is abstienence, omg i heard this story once that people live together without having sex together, i think it happened with...oh yeah the majority of living arrangements in america)

That being said, if you never intend to live with a man you are seeing until marriage, you just thinned the herd of potential mates by a large chunk like 80%+, most guys have had bad roomate situations and wouldn't dare risk marriage without sharing a roof first. Keep in mind you can terminate the marriage and end up with half of his belongings and in the USA the divorce rate is over 50%.

Him not risking half of his posessions by requesting you test the biggest form of compatibility (living together) is by far a bigger form of commitment than your requesting certain parts of the relationship be put on hold until you can both be sworn into a legal document that you can also be...sworn out of....



Do what you want, just be aware of the cause and effects of your actions.
 jrbickers123
Joined: 6/9/2008
Msg: 287 (view)
 
u can't have a plutonic friendship with opposite sex
Posted: 5/4/2009 1:21:55 AM
well from what i can gather this guy is the jealous type. most guys dont go so overboard about it unless they got something they are fighting for. in this case i think this guy would categorize his conversation with you as "i was talking with my girl" while you say "i was having a conversation with a guy i know". he's hoping theres a relationship there, he's fighting to try and make you his while you're just at that friend stage. and its pretty obvious because thats his confession in the first place. he just said he believes that talking with someone of the opposite sex is only for sexual purposes, so why is he talking with you? (anyone can see that one :P)

but to answer you're question, yes its very possible to have plutonic friendships with people of the opposite sex. some of my best friends have been girls and not once have i ever thought anything sexually about them, because there are just some people that regardless of how smokin' hot they are, or the fact that they have another X instead of a Y, i just don't even have the thought cross my mind of sex because my requirements for an intimate relationship are way different than my requirements for a plutonic relationship. sure there are times when the two overlap and things have their awkward moments.

and for that guy? i think he's a jealous guy that either is making that story up or comes from one of those religious fanatic compounds in utah or wherever :P
 jrbickers123
Joined: 6/9/2008
Msg: 42 (view)
 
I need help understanding the way women think
Posted: 5/4/2009 1:10:09 AM
compatible on A and B but not on C. don't think of it as a setback or a bad thing. sure sometimes when you first meet someone its a direct hit or miss, but that isnt true for everything. I've learned that you can find some truly amazing and wonderful people but the subtlest key differences in life styles or viewpoints can make a relationship not work, is that a bad thing? nope, some just weren't meant to be. keep on looking you'll find the right one someday :)
 jrbickers123
Joined: 6/9/2008
Msg: 15 (view)
 
Shallow? Or can you really tell in 20 mins?
Posted: 5/4/2009 1:06:48 AM
within 20 minutes you haven't begun to chip away at the surface of who a person really is, their personality type or all of that jazz. there's no way for anyone to gather enough information within that first 20 minutes to determine emotional and peronality compatibility.

what can they figure out within 20 minutes? if they'd wanna **** you or not. so in this case i'd venture to guess her definition of chemistry is good**** not the kinda person you'd want to attempt a long term relationship with. granted we all think this way to a certain extent, its just the shallow ones who voice it in the way she has.
 jrbickers123
Joined: 6/9/2008
Msg: 2 (view)
 
How Do You Tell a Guy He Smells Funny?
Posted: 8/24/2008 9:27:11 PM
honesty is the best policy. I would personally say something along the lines of "you seem a bit to clingy, or you just want to talk too much, dont rush things, anything takes time" and then i would also politely mention something along the lines of the smoke. something like "you say you dont smoke but theres always this faint aura of smoke around you. do you hang out with someone that smokes? possibly a roomate?" and as for the breath thing, i would just say "and please dont take this the wrong way, i think your a nice guy and im not insulting you, im just giving you a heads up, but your breath seems kind of funky. you might want to try a new kind of mouth wash."


dont say it the way i put it word for word or anything. just politely say that you are not insulting, you are merely looking out for his best interest, and that he has a smoke odor, and his breath is bad, offer a possible solution like "maybe you should try a new mouthwash". and most importantly DONT DO THIS IN PUBLIC, do it somewhere in private where only you and him can hear, the last thing you want to do is make him upset by pointing out his flaws in public where other people may overhear, thats just embarrasing.
 jrbickers123
Joined: 6/9/2008
Msg: 27 (view)
 
Guys, do you want to date or not?
Posted: 8/24/2008 9:13:32 PM
same thing happens to us... as offending as it may be, do your best to not take offense to rejection. on the internet its far too easy to reject someone in a disrespectful way such as just stopping communication, not even saying goodbye.

just hang in there, dont get upset by it, and do your best to set an example for everyone else you come across by being polite and straightforward. we cant make everyone polite, but we can set a good example for them :)
 jrbickers123
Joined: 6/9/2008
Msg: 672 (view)
 
Why do men stare at womens boobs & think we don't notice ???
Posted: 8/24/2008 9:07:41 PM
women are more attracted to the entire body, so they dont have any particular spot that they will be caught staring at. or if they do its not something overly sexual, afterall no woman is gonna stare at a man's groin unless he is naked, you cant see anything when he is wearing pants.

women have a lot more points of interest to look at, and due to todays views on sex you are going to find that there is a LOT of interest on women's bodies compared to mens.

factor in men are usually hornier than women, and you are going to see that men will be caught gawking a LOT more often than women. and they will be gawking at areas you cant make an excuse for.


no we arent all pigs, we dont spend every hour of the day thinking of your D cups. we dont all stare when we see them. But if my gaze ever turns across a beautiful woman's chest and i linger, and she sees then confronts me with "ARE YOU STARING AT MY BOOBS?" what is the first thing the guy will say? chances are hes gonna deny it because hes embarrased.
 jrbickers123
Joined: 6/9/2008
Msg: 78 (view)
 
How bad is it to show up at the door unannounced?
Posted: 8/24/2008 8:33:42 PM
i like to get a call before hand, but if your in the neighborhood and you stop by because you want to check up on him/her especially after they eluded to an encounter the day prior but it never happened, then i say you are perfectly in the clear.

however his reaction really isnt. I'm going to side with what the 2nd reply said (i think its the 2nd). he is hiding something, he made plans to come see you, then something came up, then the next time you saw him it wasnt on the call ahead of times terms so he was afraid whatever he is hiding would be discovered.

that usually points to cheating. but i cannot make these assumptions for you, always give a person the benefit of the doubt untill you know the truth.
 jrbickers123
Joined: 6/9/2008
Msg: 23 (view)
 
Are you being played?!
Posted: 8/24/2008 8:28:32 PM
Personally I see people being played as really really obvious. girls always falling for the same types of guys, a guy with a history of cheating on his girlfriends. I dont know how to say it, but i find it painfully obvious whenever i see a girl getting played, but i dont know how to describe it without sounding condescending you know?

the guy will lie, the guy will treat you like shit, he will not care, his goal will always to get the end result of no strings attached sex, or if there are strings attached he wont place any value on that.
 jrbickers123
Joined: 6/9/2008
Msg: 23 (view)
 
I've always wondered ... why do men lie about having sex with a girl?
Posted: 8/24/2008 3:10:27 AM
this reminds me of a hilarious conversation about how many people each person has had sex with in the movie clerks.

i dont think i've come across this. none of my friends (nor myself) would openly talk about being with any girl. although i know one guy who's main goal in life is to let the entire world know all the different ways he has had sex with his most recent girlfriend, some people just love to do that shit. but in my opinion the majority dont.
 jrbickers123
Joined: 6/9/2008
Msg: 5 (view)
 
Embarassed to be seen with me?
Posted: 8/24/2008 2:56:52 AM
one reason why guy he doesnt want to go out, could simply be that he wants to get laid. and its much easier to get some action indoors than outdoors
 jrbickers123
Joined: 6/9/2008
Msg: 57 (view)
 
Intense eye contact
Posted: 8/24/2008 2:46:19 AM
depends on the person. due to a history of abuse I tend to avoid eye contact because it just scares me, its a primal thing beyond my control.
 jrbickers123
Joined: 6/9/2008
Msg: 19 (view)
 
Was I in the wrong, or was he? Your view?
Posted: 8/24/2008 2:25:30 AM
I once was in a similar situation. I found a girl, she has 2 kids, she was with her husband but they were separated a few times and she had told him its over, theres nothing left. she is leaving him as soon as financially capable. We were friends at the time, after she had finished with him we grew into something, it really got strong but because of the drama of getting away from the ex husband, her trying to start her life over and keep custody of the children.... and she broke the relationship off and we havent spoken since.

point is, this is a "history repeats itself" scenario. but the obvious now is single parents may be ok to date. but anyone who is in the process of going through a divorce/separation, or recently gone through a divorce IS NOT READY FOR ANOTHER RELATIONSHIP. They may want another, they may be looking for love, hoping to fill this newfound void in their life. but because of the extreme drama of the situation its damn near impossible for anything to get off the ground.


If you really like this guy, and you want a relationship with him. tell him you will wait, and do it. give him a few years to sort his shit out and get stable with life and the divorce. and then go for it. if you cant wait for that then trust me the relationship will never work, move on.
 jrbickers123
Joined: 6/9/2008
Msg: 201 (view)
 
Red heads...
Posted: 8/23/2008 12:58:16 AM
sexually my preferred woman has dark red hair. I'm not too fond of gingers when it comes to redheads. But oh my LORD I love dark red hair on a girl, 9 times out of 10 its just so much hotter than brown or blonde or anything else. but thats just my personal preference, and i know a few other guys who dig the redheads as well.

but we dont all love them. I've come across a few men who want nothing more than a 100lb blonde girl with the figure of an anorexic 12 year old boy, and swear by it.
 jrbickers123
Joined: 6/9/2008
Msg: 3 (view)
 
What to wear on a first date?
Posted: 8/23/2008 12:52:43 AM
Given that you care about your appearance your wardrobe is going to actively reflect you as a person. Changing it would mean to change who you are, to pretend you are something you are not. Sure you should upgrade your wardrobe and get some new clothes, but you shouldn't go based on what people tell you to wear. Go shopping and find something you think looks good on you, something you are comfortable with, something that says "this is me!"

If you dont care about your appearance nearly as much then you have a wardrobe that can be pretty plain and dull, nothing but T shirts and jeans, etc. If that is the case then go with it, even though you don't care about your wardrobe it still has a statement, it says "look at me, I don't give a shit what anyone thinks of me." or it says "I'm a lazy slob". the message your wardrobe sends will be taken differently by different guys, don't expect them all to see the same way.


Now then, to answer your original question :). First dates are pretty casual, they are a first impression physically. You may have met and talked online for a week or more, but you have yet to actually meet each other. So this is still an introduction. Wear your average every day clothes, if you want to impress then try something a bit more. Put on your favorite shirt, sweater, coat, scarf, skirt, dress, ect. But unless you are totally GA GA for the guy its best not to go over the top at first, just dress as you normally would. As long as you aren't dressed like a total slut, like you just rolled out of bed, or like you spent the past 3 weeks planning this outfit, you should be just fine.

Its your personality, and how you connect that the guy is paying attention to...or so we hope :)
 jrbickers123
Joined: 6/9/2008
Msg: 147 (view)
 
When you see a woman you like, what do you do?
Posted: 8/23/2008 12:39:25 AM
I dont approach her =x. I'm really shy, the only way i can find the courage to ask a cute girl the time of day is through the distance and semi-anonymity of the internet on dating sites.
 jrbickers123
Joined: 6/9/2008
Msg: 137 (view)
 
The Challenge is on...Men's opinions are needed!
Posted: 8/23/2008 12:37:37 AM
its a common statement amongst men that "men dont have friends that are female, they just have chicks that they once wanted to **** but either didnt get that far, or lost interest"

this is true for the vast majority of men, and their relationships with women.

friends does not equal casual sex. however if you are an openly declared swinger then obviously you may very well have sex with your friends.

and for your third question. this sounds like a VERY angry lesbian wrote this to be honest. but to answer it, DUHHHHHHHHHHhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh. there are a few girls i regard as little sisters, and would never think of anything sexual with them. and then some other girls who are great friends, but just not at all sexually appealing to me at all so the thought has never crossed my mind.

You are on an online dating website, people are here for relationships, the majority of people are here for intimate relationships. therefor the majority of men you meet here are going to be after a serious intimite relationship or sex.

If you want "just friends" go to myspace.
 jrbickers123
Joined: 6/9/2008
Msg: 15 (view)
 
What does he want?
Posted: 8/23/2008 12:31:58 AM
he wants sex but doesnt want a relationship
 jrbickers123
Joined: 6/9/2008
Msg: 1 (view)
 
does it annoy you girls when....
Posted: 8/23/2008 12:28:45 AM
This is an "Ask A Girl" forum, and so so so many of the first responses to good honest questions are other guys. I can understand a guy giving his opinion on a particular topic, such as sending the sender a private message in regards and discussing it there. Or to provoke the question further, with adding in an additional question.

but does it annoy you ladies at all that the same 5-10 guys are pretending they are women by answering all questions on your forum?

and a part 2 to that question. Is it me or are a few of these repeat "offenders" really really anti women. Like I noticed a few of them (wont name names) but every response they have is just bashing women.
 jrbickers123
Joined: 6/9/2008
Msg: 95 (view)
 
Is being an intellectual no longer attractive ?
Posted: 8/23/2008 12:20:56 AM
does it bother anyone else that so many men are answering questions in the "ask a girl" forum?
 jrbickers123
Joined: 6/9/2008
Msg: 33 (view)
 
How do women feel about being sexually rejected ?
Posted: 8/23/2008 12:17:09 AM
when it comes to asking for a sexual encounter men are like shotguns and women like snipers.

Men will ask as many women as possible, knowing that one will eventually say yes.

Women carefully select their targets, they watch them like a hawk, they prepare their "attack". and they chose their "victim".

naturally men are going to get rejected a lot more than women just because of the strategies we tend to use.


Women feel just the same as men do about sexual rejection, they just don't feel it as often because they dont ask every guy they see.
 jrbickers123
Joined: 6/9/2008
Msg: 9 (view)
 
mental disorders, do you reject people based on them?
Posted: 8/13/2008 11:37:12 PM
I like your response mominatrix. mental disorders can be broken into 3 groups really easy. something caused physically, something caused mentally, and a combination of the two. I like to think phobias are things caused mentally, multiple personality disorder to be a combination of the two (years of abuse etc). and my condition to be purely physical. I've had cat scans done, and guess what? i have a FAR from normal brain because of my memory deal :)

and i LOVE your analogy about diabetes
 jrbickers123
Joined: 6/9/2008
Msg: 7 (view)
 
mental disorders, do you reject people based on them?
Posted: 8/13/2008 3:05:02 PM
I take criticism very well, so don't worry about insulting me. *and please don't draw the conclusion that I'm insulted*

Looking over everyone's responses it seems kind of spread out. I definitely see how this isn't just a question for women, its also a question thats just as applicable to the men.

Some people are very open minded and understand that not everyone is perfect and are willing to deal with it. In fact one of you actually is in a relationship with a person who has a similar if not the same condition as myself, that makes me happy to see that relationships are still possible. It seems like with mental disorders the only real turn off for people is if its uncontrolled or makes the person dangerous, either to themselves or others. As long as the person afflicted is coping with it (which I do) the majority of the people out there aren't phased by it. If its a bit beyond coping control I see a lot of people tending to veer away from relationships with people like that. If the person becomes uncontrollably violent, simply cannot handle their frustration in a civilized manner, or is a full blown wacko-loon who wears a tin foil hat all day, then I see people just avoiding them.

and interestingly enough I see some responses that are virtually a slap in the face and even more dehumanizing than the things that go on at Guantanamo. my question was, do women reject men based on mental disorders that the man may have? One response surprisingly enough was "Well yes. Actually I do. No psychos. Just a preference!" My discussion is on mental disorders, that ranges from things like my memory loss, to mild A.D.D. and all the way to schizophrenia, and someone actually bunched them up into one little group and called them "psychos"

*by the way iconoclast you did not insult me, nor am I attacking you, just using your response as an example of how bigotry is still quite prominent in society*

It kind of surprises me that some people would actually pass such a harsh judgement on a person they have demonstrated they know nothing about. This reinforces one thing that some people have brought up with, "don't tell them everything wrong with you on the first date, it will be the last date." I think I'm going to stick with that idea. If I end up a few dates down the road with a girl and things are looking up I think thats when I will chose to let them in on my disorder, but otherwise it seems a lot of people can be very mean and pass you off without even knowing you yet.
 jrbickers123
Joined: 6/9/2008
Msg: 91 (view)
 
Why do guys start dating so soon after breaking up?
Posted: 8/12/2008 10:38:37 PM
thats a generalization. I was cheated on 4 months ago and it was the most devastating thing ever (first time I was actually in love) and it took me a good 2 months to get over it.

not all guys move on so fast. a lot of women move on really fast too.
 jrbickers123
Joined: 6/9/2008
Msg: 5 (view)
 
mental disorders, do you reject people based on them?
Posted: 8/12/2008 7:24:51 PM
thank you for your input everyone. I'm eager to see what a wide variety of people have to say :)
 jrbickers123
Joined: 6/9/2008
Msg: 1 (view)
 
mental disorders, do you reject people based on them?
Posted: 8/12/2008 5:27:56 PM
My question is, do the majority of women automatically reject a man because he has a mental disorder? I know that a lot of it has to do with timing and how you present it to them. I mean honestly, how many second dates would a guy get if he said "by the way I'm OCD" or something like that. But what if your up front about it, put it out there in the profile so women know, will women reject you based on that? or what if you decide to hide it until a relationship builds, and you have built enough trust to be able to say something like that?

I don't use my mental disorder as a crutch, I don't let it control my life, I don't bring it up at every conversation, I don't bring it up at the first date unless its pertinent information.

I have a memory disorder, I sometimes have no short term memory. And very frequently I have no long term memory. I'f you've ever seen the movie Memento I'm a lot like that guy, only my condition isn't nearly as bad as his. I used to carry a notebook around to write everything down in case I forgot, however its awefully nerdy to carry a notebook everywhere and always write in it :P, I have since changed over to an Ipod Touch and I use its note feature to write tons of notes.

I have had this memory condition ruin several potential relationships, and I know that some women just don't understand. Example one time I ran into this really cute girl who just seemed really cool, I asked if she ever wanted to hang out sometime, maybe get a coffee get to know each other etc. Turns out I grew up with her, we were best friends for half of our childhood, on swim team together, and just got out of touch around high school and she took MAJOR offense to me not knowing her. I tried to explain I have a memory disorder but she just called me a player and a jack ass.

any input would really be appreciated, I really want to know what people have to say about this :)
 jrbickers123
Joined: 6/9/2008
Msg: 84 (view)
 
why do guys like to cum on a girl's face?
Posted: 8/12/2008 5:10:40 PM
are you speaking from personal experience? or from watching way too much porn? cause it sounds like the later.
 jrbickers123
Joined: 6/9/2008
Msg: 8 (view)
 
Do women understand how trivial the Olympics are?
Posted: 8/12/2008 3:53:43 PM
i like how this is the "ask a girl" forum. and yet i see so many guys answering other guy's questions. gender identity crisis anyone?
 jrbickers123
Joined: 6/9/2008
Msg: 20 (view)
 
Just Admit That You Are Wrong
Posted: 8/11/2008 9:53:07 PM
its human nature. its not a woman thing, its not a man thing. people in general tend to do this
 jrbickers123
Joined: 6/9/2008
Msg: 1 (view)
 
poor sense of direction
Posted: 8/11/2008 7:46:47 PM
i live in redmond oregon. i filter it to within 50 miles of me, even 25 miles of me. and it shows people all the way in portland...portland is about 130 miles away from here.

Getting kinda annoying
 jrbickers123
Joined: 6/9/2008
Msg: 20 (view)
 
Maybe He's Just Slow
Posted: 8/11/2008 7:23:03 PM
I have a memory disorder

most people out there aren't ready, or aren't willing to deal with a boyfriend with a disorder of the mental kind, they jump to conclusions and fall back on stereotypes.

I don't think I'm being dishonest. but i have to hide this from people when i meet them, and later, if the relationship goes somewhere, if it seems like she is a keeper I will let her know about it and hope for the best.


basically women will naturally avoid people with ANY mental condition, and im sure men will do the same. so we have to hide it and not outright say it. thats probably why you think so many people are undiagnosed.

lets be honest, how many women would want a second date with me if i said "by the way i have a memory condition that is much like amnesia"
 jrbickers123
Joined: 6/9/2008
Msg: 11 (view)
 
Tired of all the b/s
Posted: 8/11/2008 6:06:55 PM
you cant expect everyone to fall in love with you. You could have some serious compatibility issues with everyone. its a lot easier online to ask everyone you see for a date. but when your in person, you dont actually ask that super model across the street, why? because you know your not within their standards.

there are only 10 active people on POF in my area, and pretty much all of them are SUPER HOT girls between 18 and 20. I'm a bit big, im a lil fat, im not the cutest guy in the world. and I'm not upset. I'm waiting for someone in my area to join POF, someone that has standards that i fall into.

you just have to do the same. you could be attracted to them, but they arent attracted to you.
just like.................................................im attracted to them, but they arent attracted to me.

so get over it, everyone else does =/
 jrbickers123
Joined: 6/9/2008
Msg: 43 (view)
 
Oral Sex on Uncircumsized Penis...?
Posted: 8/11/2008 5:54:16 PM
all you have to make sure of with a circumcised guy is make sure he pulls the skin back to expose the head, otherwise its a protective barrier that will render the guy immune to any sensation. it's actually a pretty nifty trick we can use, if we wanna go at it for hours on end and not worry about climaxing.
 jrbickers123
Joined: 6/9/2008
Msg: 1 (view)
 
Central Oregon
Posted: 8/11/2008 5:44:07 PM
So at first I thought this site wasn't that popular. I do a search with some VERY non-specific criteria for a wide range of results. and there are only 10 people. I was like "wow thats just lame" then I thought, "maybe its the location" so I searched corvallis and come up with 5 straight pages of people active within a week.

Is central oregon really this dead? (for the online dating scene at least)
 jrbickers123
Joined: 6/9/2008
Msg: 19 (view)
 
Single mom's and the men who date them
Posted: 8/11/2008 5:17:09 PM
i see a re-occuring theme and i agree with it.

dont get the children involved with the man you are dating untill you know its solid. that doesnt mean hide the kid from him, it means do activities with him, not with him and the kid. tell your kid he is your boyfriend, and just sorta leave it at that. If you have the guy constantly interacting with your kid he is probably gonna get the message that you want him to be a father, and you dont even know if hes mr. right yet!

dont put your child through the hell of a ton of your boyfriends messing with his/her life, its bad enough that the kid is being raised by one person instead of two. keep the boyfriends as boyfriends till you are sure they can also be fathers.
 jrbickers123
Joined: 6/9/2008
Msg: 7 (view)
 
Hey Girls Be Careful!!!!!!
Posted: 8/11/2008 5:08:18 PM
why would anyone ever give money to a stranger?

If some guy i see once in a while but dont know asks for a buck to get a soda and says he will pay me back tomorrow. i'll take that risk of being out a dollar and be a nice guy

If some guy i see once in a while but dont know asks for a couple hundred or couple thousand dollars i laugh hysterically and walk away.
 jrbickers123
Joined: 6/9/2008
Msg: 20 (view)
 
Read, but not deleted... Interested?
Posted: 8/11/2008 4:49:51 PM
if theres no reply within the next day, theres no interest. the furthest you should ever read into something is "oh, its been read, but not replied, perhaps he is at work and will reply later" (1 day later) "oh no reply, he's not interested"

the end
 jrbickers123
Joined: 6/9/2008
Msg: 3 (view)
 
Men jumping in, in the beginning of a relationship
Posted: 8/11/2008 4:45:52 PM
this is the internet, a lot of guys here havent been in a serious relationship for a long time. or havent been laid in a long time.

just use some clarifiers when talking with them, if you see a message in your inbox from them dont read it for a day or so, then read it, reply. some guys look to see if somethings been read, and if its read and not replied they freak out and start sending more messages. same with texting, dont reply except when you feel like it. but use clarifiers like.... "ok ill talk to you tomorrow" or "i'll see you then", if they dont get a hint then make the hint bigger, and if they still dont get it just say something like "look, when i say ill talk to you tomorrow, i mean tomorrow, not 5 minutes from now, and then an hour from now. I'm not brushing you off, i just dont wanna rush into anything"
 jrbickers123
Joined: 6/9/2008
Msg: 8 (view)
 
do men find the nipple piercing attractive?
Posted: 8/11/2008 4:41:39 PM
theres a message with everything we do to our bodies. If you tattoo a half naked woman on your arm, men are going to probably get the impression that your at the very least BI. If you pierce your ears traditionally there is NO message, its standard, its average, you cant tell if that person is a nun or a sex crazed chick into DVDA. now we take a piercing, and we add it to something sexual. and what message will guys get? the message they will get is that you have a VERY strong sex drive, they will think your just as horny as them. thats the general answer, and its a subconcious conclusion that men will come to.

Men love boobs, lets face it boobs are awesome. Most of us could play with them all day, anything you do to them could either turn the guy on or off big time. Some guys love boob jobs, some guys love naturals, some guys love tattoos on them, some guys love a clean canvas, some guys love the piercing, some think its whorish, or just nasty.

also, remember who you are asking. we are on the internet, this is a dating site, and you are asking in the place where all the men hang out..... men + looking for relationship + internet = a WHOOOOOOOLE lot of very very sexually driven men. You are going to get a lot of thumbs up on your question, and a lot of guys are gonna tell you to go for it. just remember the audience you are asking.


that being said, it depends on the boobs, not the size, but the shape and quality. it could look really good or really bad. get some clip ons or something and ask one of your girlfriends if you look hot with it or not. (are there actual clip ons for nipples? i dont know, just a thought). its like asking someone if you look fat in a dress, no one knows till you put the dress on, find someone you are sexually secure with like a best friend (same sex probably helps) and get their opinion too. girls are ALWAYS asking each other if they look cuter with or without something, from clothing to makeup, and piercings as well.
 jrbickers123
Joined: 6/9/2008
Msg: 20 (view)
 
Must be college educated?
Posted: 8/11/2008 4:31:21 PM
we all have silly lists we make up for requirements for the other.

I wont date a woman with a lazy eye, or cross-eyed. nor will i date a woman with a peg leg and an eye patch. Or a beard, definitely no beards for me.

now i'm sure theres a peg legged bearded woman with an eyepatch and 1 lazy eye who will take very high offense to me and think im the most sexist pig in the world.


your argument is "this man is clearly not a match for me, I FIND THIS A GREAT INJUSTICE!" theres a reason why this place is called PLENTY of fish. theres a lot to chose from, obviously not all of them will be right for you.
 jrbickers123
Joined: 6/9/2008
Msg: 4 (view)
 
Should I be concerned about wanting sex more often than he does?
Posted: 8/11/2008 4:26:04 PM
believe it or not. Not all the men in the world want sex every hour on the hour for the rest of their lives. we're not all driven by our****.

I for one would rather cuddle and watch movies, or have deep conversations about each other and life than **** till the sun comes up.
 jrbickers123
Joined: 6/9/2008
Msg: 10 (view)
 
Questions about the ex?
Posted: 8/11/2008 4:19:58 PM
sounds genuinely creepy. but he is either gay and wants your ex husband, and the date with you is all a rouse. Or he is trying to uncover some dirt on you. a lot of girls hide their bad decisions from their past by just not talking about it, and in their defense later when the guy finds out they always say something like "but you never asked me if i've ever given 50 blowjobs in a single night at a frat party!".

just my 2 cents
 jrbickers123
Joined: 6/9/2008
Msg: 4 (view)
 
Influence of intense pre-meet relationship when you finally meet?
Posted: 8/11/2008 4:16:36 PM
intense...


ok simplest and easiest rule in the world to follow "dont fall in love on the internet" trust me you WILL be let down. meet them on the internet, get to know them a bit on the internet, but fall in love in person.

when we are dealing with talking over the internet, if things are getting "intense" it sounds like you've confused this website with fling.com
 
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