Notice: Forums will be shutdown by June 2019

To focus on better serving our members, we've decided to shut down the POF forums.

While regular posting is now disabled, you can continue to view all threads until the end of June 2019. Event Hosts can still create and promote events while we work on a new and improved event creation service for you.

Thank you!

          

Show ALL Forums
Posted In Forum:

Home   login   MyForums  
 
 Author Thread: Confusion in a gay relationship
 aliveone1
Joined: 9/4/2008
Msg: 23 (view)
 
Confusion in a gay relationship
Posted: 3/3/2010 4:06:37 PM
Don't date someone who has no idea who they are yet! You do not need to be a part of THAT drama!! There are plenty of self-assured lesbians out there. Find one.
 aliveone1
Joined: 9/4/2008
Msg: 26 (view)
 
Do people really not act like themselves till in a committed relationship?
Posted: 3/3/2010 3:33:33 PM
I took the" walking on eggshells" thing on this particular context to simply mean that the poster thinks you need to stand up for yourself if something another person is doing is bothering you, rather than "walking on eggshells", or trying hard not to upset the person or address the issue.

I guess I don't see how this relates to the second part of your question about people not being true to themselves until committed relationships. I would need more information about your specific situation to understand why you mentally connected the two ideas.

Perhaps you have never heard the term "walking on eggshells"?

EDIT: Perhaps you think you asking if people are more likely to just let little annoyances slide while dating, and are more likely to address them when married? If so, some people might agree with that, which is one reason people give for not wanting to get married: The Nit-Picking, or Controlling Behavior that some say are a part of marriage. Don't know if this is anywhere near what you were talking about though! Hope this helps!
 aliveone1
Joined: 9/4/2008
Msg: 16 (view)
 
Permanently Damaged
Posted: 3/2/2010 4:52:25 PM
green.apple: It is ridiculous to think that jealous behavior will prevent a person from cheating. It comes from within to cheat. A cheater at heart will always find a way to cheat, just as a person who is jealous by nature will suspect infedility where there is only loyalty.
 aliveone1
Joined: 9/4/2008
Msg: 123 (view)
 
People Who Can't Be Punctual
Posted: 3/2/2010 4:18:38 PM
died1000deaths: You're killing me! LOL! That must be some seriously good sh!t you are smoking! Why haven't I seen you showing up in any other threads? You should make this your full time gig! ....Words from BEYOND!
 aliveone1
Joined: 9/4/2008
Msg: 18 (view)
 
Ex's that just don't get, NO!
Posted: 3/2/2010 3:33:44 PM
What is with the super old threads being put up all the time? Can no one think of any more good questions? I hate answering these things if they are not currently relevant! I like to be on the cutting edge of things, you know? Geesh.

Um. Cut off all communication with her. That is my answer. If that doesn't work, put the restraining order back in place and call the police every time she comes by.
 aliveone1
Joined: 9/4/2008
Msg: 90 (view)
 
jealousy what does it mean
Posted: 3/2/2010 3:15:14 PM
I know your question was posed to men, but since I believe that men and women are more similar than different, I thought it would be appropriate to answer.

My entire life, I have always had more male (plotonic) friends than female. That's just the way it has always been. My significant other has never been jealous or suspicious of this. He has good reason for this, because I would never cheat. But I have to say that when I first began dating him, his lack of jealousy concerned me a bit. I wondered if maybe he didn't really care about me, and that's why he didn't seem at all jealous.

Now that I have matured a bit, and gotten to know my S/O better, I realize that his trust in me is a great compliment to me. He shows that he knows that I have a strong character and that I would never do anything that would jeopardize our relationship.
I feel very lucky to have a man in my life that allows me to keep my independence with dignity. I love him more for that.
 aliveone1
Joined: 9/4/2008
Msg: 29 (view)
 
80/20
Posted: 3/1/2010 3:13:11 PM
I wouldn't know how to quantify my relationship using your method. Instead, I just carry around a blood pressure monitor. If my S/O makes my blood pressure read no higher than 120/80 at any given point during the day, then he is a keeper. If he's giving me hypertension, then he must be ditched....kidding of course, kind of.
 aliveone1
Joined: 9/4/2008
Msg: 11 (view)
 
Do We Attract Our Parents?
Posted: 2/23/2010 4:03:56 PM
LOL. There may be something to this Oedipus/Ophelia Complex thing, but frankly the whole thing creeps me out way to much to even TRY to apply this theory to my own life. Freakin' Ew! LOL
 aliveone1
Joined: 9/4/2008
Msg: 61 (view)
 
Constantly Haunted By Ex
Posted: 2/23/2010 3:43:17 PM
I know that pretty often, I have ideas out of the mainstream, but I just don't see why it bothers you! I don't think it is right for you to expect him to cut someone out of his life entirely that means so much to him. I think this has more to do with your own insecurities than anything that he is doing. It is definately possible to remain friends with an ex and have it be only that. The financial obligation could logically be based on a promise to her that happened during their relationship, which he never followed through on. By his now taking care of it, in his mind he is ending an obligation to her. I can totally see how he thinks that he is doing this for YOUR relationship.

But, this is your relationship, not mine. If you can't get past it, and you will never truly trust him, then I guess you will need to leave him. I can't imagine what un-needed stress you are creating for yourself!

And didn't your opening post say that he offered to stop communication with his ex, but that you did not tell him that you would like him to ,so he continued? He's not a mind reader! Forgive this statement if in fact you have been very clear with him. I still don't think that is a very nice or reasonable request though!
 aliveone1
Joined: 9/4/2008
Msg: 27 (view)
 
is separate habitation the new living together?
Posted: 2/22/2010 9:22:12 PM
Wow. Awww....someone finally called me a player! LOL! Thanks Honcho and all of you that suggested it is a casual or friends with benefits relationship. Nope, sorry it is a monogamous long term relationship everyone. I wouldn't even dream about a FWB relationship. Ew!! Sheesh!

Honcho, yeah, I want "sex without the responsibility of a relationship"! I think not. The man is 20 years older and I said that I would marry him, for crying out loud. That means I could be changing his diapers in the future. I would do it even if we weren't married. Seriously laughable!
 aliveone1
Joined: 9/4/2008
Msg: 56 (view)
 
People Who Can't Be Punctual
Posted: 2/22/2010 8:22:04 PM
Confessions of Tardiness:

It's simply bad time management skills. I used to have the same problem. I think it is more common in people who tend to be dreamers or have an artistic temperment. We get lost in thought when we should be getting ready. Time just seems to escape us.

It took a lot of work on my part to get better about it. It was a problem I had had my entire life. I would miss the bus most of the time in elementary school and have to be driven in. In highschool when I was driving myself there, I got 30 detentions in a row one time just for always walking in to class a few minutes after the bell. It wasn't until I began working at a place with a time clock that I started pulling things together. But not before I almost lost my job over it!

It affected my social life too. My friends told me years later that they would tell me to meet them about half an hour before they actually planned to be somewhere so that we would get there around the same time.

It took me years of consciously planning all the moments leading up to my departure before it became easy to get somewhere on time. I would even write down my schedule so I could refer to it. I started laying out my clothes for the next day the previous night. Now I have taken it a step further than that, and I wear basically the same outfit EVERY day! I bought at least 8 of everything (an extra set for laundry day). So, that saves some time. I now wear short hair which is styled the same way every day. All this in an attempt to be able to get out the door faster. I also bought A LOT of clocks so that there is now a clock basically every where you turn in my apartment . It's practically a collection. It is in fact! Some of them are pretty unique!

So, don't think that people who are always late don't realize that it affects the lives of others, and that we don't feel bad about it. It does feel like it certainly can't be helped when it is happening. Perhaps you might be able to suggest some tips to your S/O to help him to improve his time management skills.
 aliveone1
Joined: 9/4/2008
Msg: 33 (view)
 
Dealing with someone who has nothing but negativity to share
Posted: 2/22/2010 7:43:34 PM
Don't allow someone to drain you like that! How depressing!! I would cut off all communication. Just don't answer your phone when she calls. You could even have one last conversation with her first and tell her that you just can't be a part of that kind of relationship anymore.
 aliveone1
Joined: 9/4/2008
Msg: 67 (view)
 
How would you celebrate one year of dating?
Posted: 2/21/2010 6:47:06 AM
I think that is really sweet that you want to celebrate! I always celebrate these little milestones too. My SO and I met at a Memorial Day barbeque, so this has always been a very big holiday for us. Oh, now you've got me thinking...I'll have to start planning next year's get together soon now.
 aliveone1
Joined: 9/4/2008
Msg: 22 (view)
 
Why is direct communication so uncomfortable
Posted: 2/20/2010 10:57:41 PM
I don't care what form the honesty or directness comes in: e-mail, phone call, text, letter, or in person. What is important is that communication lines are kept open and all issues are addressed. I expect this from the moment I meet a person. It is just a respect issue.
 aliveone1
Joined: 9/4/2008
Msg: 14 (view)
 
is separate habitation the new living together?
Posted: 2/20/2010 10:22:49 PM
Here's a new thought: I would consider marrying the man I am with now, but I see no logical reason why that would mean that we had to live together. Food for thought...talk amongst yourselves....lol.
 aliveone1
Joined: 9/4/2008
Msg: 12 (view)
 
is separate habitation the new living together?
Posted: 2/20/2010 9:39:06 PM
BigDaddyJinx: Normally, I find your posts pretty offensive, but this time I just thought it was funny. To answer your question about why I felt I needed to become more domestic: because it was expected and necessary! When I live by myself...the house seems to just magically stay clean! Of course there is the stuff that you always have to do occassionally like clean the soap scum out of the shower or dust...but piles of clothes don't just APPEAR where once there was clean floor. Or, I don't walk into the bathroom to find a puddle that soaks my socks, and then notice that the sink is littered with small hairs and shaving cream bits and toothpaste that have hardened on.

Also, when I am alone, I don't cook, I HEAT (microwaveable meals), or only consume things that can be eaten in the form they are bought in, like lettuce or apples or crackers.

And, I can amazingly eat well and healthily for weeks without even dirtying a single plate, cup, pot, or pan! It's like magic! I love it! Paper plates, and cups and plastic silverware. Maybe not environmentally very conscious, but I never proclamaimed to be perfect. I do go through a couple of coffee cups, but I rinse them immediately and use the same one or two for about a week.

When I live with a guy, I have an entire sink full of dishes all of the time, it seems.

And most guys, in reality, are not satisfied my idea of dinner. They may eat like I do when they are living alone, but as soon as they move in, they think they are entitled to more than me telling them that are meals in the freezer, and if they are hungery, they can heat it up themselves when they feel like it! Hey, sorry, I am no Martha Stewart!

Although I tried so hard to be when I was living with someone, and I hated it. I hated it because it just seemed expected and taken for granted. Ummmmm....no thank you!

Now, my guy and I wake up in the same bed about half of the week or more, either at his place or mine. I find that we are both more respectful of each other's living spaces because essentially we are guests there. It's a little like going on mini-vacations at the other's houses. I have lived with him in the past, and this arrangement seems much more agreeable for us. But, everyone is different which is why I was curious what other people thought about this lifestyle. Thanks for the input everyone!
 aliveone1
Joined: 9/4/2008
Msg: 8 (view)
 
is separate habitation the new living together?
Posted: 2/20/2010 8:46:16 PM
Funny observation Mr. Evil!! That is a good point, I bet I would have been blasted if I were a man posting this! I bet if we were going to stereotype, if a man posts something similar, they are a player, and if a woman posts something similar, they are a cold be-otch. LMAO.

I wish someone would call me a player! Now that would be true equality at work!
 aliveone1
Joined: 9/4/2008
Msg: 5 (view)
 
is separate habitation the new living together?
Posted: 2/20/2010 7:37:50 PM
Interesting response, eyeofthecamera! I can't say that I entirely agree with your ideas, but I would bet that many men would agree with you. I was beginning to wonder if it was more common for women to want to live separately so as not to be roped in to a full time housekeeper position...seems like a common theme. I wonder if there are more people who would prefer living separately if money were not such an issue for so many people.
 aliveone1
Joined: 9/4/2008
Msg: 1 (view)
 
is separate habitation the new living together?
Posted: 2/20/2010 6:54:03 PM
A recent thread got me thinking. It asked if marriage is now a "dying paradigm" now that living together is becoming more socially acceptable. I'll take that a step further and ask if living together will soon become a dying paradigm as both men and women are now beginning to embrace their independence?

I see a lot of people here in the forums saying that they do not wish to ever get married. In my opinion living with someone brings all of the same challenges that being married to someone does.

I have never been married, and I do not wish to. However, I have had two long term relationships in which I lived with my partner for a number of years. I found that I felt pressured to suddenly become more domestic with cooking and cleaning and such. The whole dynamic of the relationship changed as it seemed it was a struggle to get enough help around house from the men, which lead to resentment at every turn. A sock haphazardly thrown in the middle of the room, or finding the kitchen sponge filled with dish soap instead of rinsed would make my blood boil. I became more demanding of my partner, which in turn was not happily received! (Not surprisingly!)
Even I do not like myself when I am living with someone!!

So now, after already having decided that I don't want kids or marriage, I am leaning toward not ever wanting to even cohabitate again! I am now with a man who I have dated on and off for about 5 years...we visit at each others houses, and this seems like the perfect compromise.

Are there others out there who feel the same way? Do you feel that you need to live with someone to be close to him or her?
 aliveone1
Joined: 9/4/2008
Msg: 6 (view)
 
Stereotypes against intellectuals
Posted: 2/20/2010 6:19:26 PM
Maybe you are not looking for women in the right venues. Hang out in upscale coffee shops...meet them in classes while furtering your education....I dunno (yeah, that time the spelling mistake was intentional. ) , go to wine tastings? lol Art shows? Book clubs? Open mics? Poetry readings?

I live in a college town where many people are practically perpetual students including myself. Intellectual people come in all varieties, and at least where I live, are very easy to meet at social events. Maybe you just need to get out more!
 aliveone1
Joined: 9/4/2008
Msg: 3 (view)
 
Stereotypes against intellectuals
Posted: 2/20/2010 5:59:12 PM
You are not leaving an option in your question for people who do not embrace this strereotype. I would fall into that category. In fact, this stereotype has never even occured to me. A more fitting stereotype (which I also do not subscribe to) might be that well educated people, male and female, can sometimes seem a bit too "tightly wound", and may tend hold too high opinions of themselves which make them somewhat hard to love.

Please Note: Feel free to angerily rant here:
 aliveone1
Joined: 9/4/2008
Msg: 62 (view)
 
Do guys like these exist past 35?
Posted: 2/20/2010 3:57:27 PM
LaPrincess, Guys like you are looking for do exist. I know because I am dating one. But, I have to set you straight about your views about younger women dating older guys. I have been with my current guy since I was 26 and he was 46. Now I am 30 and he is 50. I've always been more attracted to guys who are about 20 years older.
 aliveone1
Joined: 9/4/2008
Msg: 1196 (view)
 
are women playing GOD when they become pregnant
Posted: 2/13/2010 4:35:56 PM
Wear a condom or get a vasectomy and quit your complaining!
 aliveone1
Joined: 9/4/2008
Msg: 48 (view)
 
Recliners, lazy boys, easy chairs
Posted: 2/13/2010 4:01:22 PM
This reminds me of a song by the band Cake. The singer is talking about how much he loves his Malibu where is girlfriend can scootch right over next to him while they are driving. " I need you to be next to me, not way over in the bucket seat!".


So, you're not alone. I can definately relate. Yup,I'm a snuggler. I've gone so far as to turn my living room practically in to a second bedroom so as to be condusive to better snuggling while watching TV. My futon is in permanent bed mode when my guy is visiting!
 aliveone1
Joined: 9/4/2008
Msg: 7 (view)
 
My Thoughts on Emotions
Posted: 2/13/2010 1:54:26 PM
Most of my close friends are men. I think men are just as emotional as women, but many of them don't feel that they can express their emotions as freely as many women do. I think that is what the OP was getting at too. However, just because men may not talk as freely about their emotions, doesn't mean that they are not affected deeply by them. It also doesn't mean that their emotions don't affect their decision making or actions either. I've always thought that men and women are more similar than different.

I can do without a lot of unnecessary outward drama, though, that I find is common when I hang out with women. That's probably why I gravitate toward male friends.
 aliveone1
Joined: 9/4/2008
Msg: 31 (view)
 
What in the world did I have to do with your last marriage?
Posted: 2/13/2010 1:04:41 PM
What is the basis for being optomistic about a second go at marriage? Marriage is supposed to last a lifetime. It only takes having been through one that didn't work to render the institution useless. Get over it, it has nothing to do with you. Find someone else who is a blissful as you.
 aliveone1
Joined: 9/4/2008
Msg: 46 (view)
 
different tastes
Posted: 2/12/2010 4:14:51 PM
Maybe you think you don't deserve better...You do.
 aliveone1
Joined: 9/4/2008
Msg: 95 (view)
 
Why would a guy go on this site looking for friends???
Posted: 2/12/2010 3:23:24 PM
Wow. Finally a forum where the majority of the posts I read are from people who really believe it is possible to be on here just looking for friends! Yay! I'm so sick of people being paranoid about alterior motives!
 aliveone1
Joined: 9/4/2008
Msg: 31 (view)
 
She wants this lifestyle, but i cant handle it...
Posted: 2/10/2010 5:59:20 PM
Wow! Just when I thought I had already heard the worst of the weird relationship stories!....lol! geesh! Yeah, you were definately right to run! What, so did she want him to just hang out in a black leather collar and leash sitting on the floor beside you guys while you ate dinner...throw him some scraps occasionally, then call him in to bed with you two?! What the...?! I can't stop laughing about the imagery....that's just wrong!
 aliveone1
Joined: 9/4/2008
Msg: 48 (view)
 
Is boredom the new excuse for lonliness?
Posted: 2/8/2010 8:07:49 PM
Well, actually, after reading what I just wrote, I guess I agree with you too. What's wrong with making real relationships on here anyway? That's what's so great about the internet I think. Bored? Well, the healthiest thing you can do is meet people and interact with others. That's what brings meaning to our lives is connecting with others. It's a lot more fulfilling than some of the other things we could be doing online...porn and video games.

But, believe it when people tell you that they are on this site and not looking to date but truly only speak in the forums and or make plotonic friends.
 aliveone1
Joined: 9/4/2008
Msg: 123 (view)
 
Is Dating over 30 tougher than it was when you were in your 20's?
Posted: 2/8/2010 7:22:06 PM
I think it is much easier to date now that I have gotten older. I am more self assured, and so are the men. I never wanted to date men in their 20's even when I was in my 20's! Now that I am in my 30's, I am still not impressed with most of the men my age! Men improve with age: 40's and 50's are best. I wonder if I will still feel that way when I am that age...well, I'll have to change my tune if I am still with my guy of 5 years now....when I am 50 I'll have to say, no men in their 70's are definately at the best!
 aliveone1
Joined: 9/4/2008
Msg: 91 (view)
 
So is it men, women or both?
Posted: 2/8/2010 6:52:13 PM
I hear ya! I think that it is important to look at everyone as an individual. I also think that men and women are more alike than different. I've had my fair share of dating tribulations, but I have yet to come up with any far reaching generalizations about men or women that would explain all of my bad experiences! That would seem a bit unfair to all of the unique people out there!

I don't see how people can enter in to healthy relationships with so much stereotypical thinking and bitterness.
 aliveone1
Joined: 9/4/2008
Msg: 46 (view)
 
Is boredom the new excuse for lonliness?
Posted: 2/8/2010 6:18:10 PM
Sadly enough, I really am THAT bored!! I love these forums! I didn't post for a while because I am dating someone, but one night recently, I got sick of facebook and playing Vampire Wars for 7 hours straight, and thought I would come back and see how all of my old buds in the POF forums are doing. Hey Daynaze and SomeWoman!! Also, I still regularly get together with some of the local friends I've made on here. (It's all on the up and up!) We all hang out and chill...the guys that didn't work out, me and my squeeze. I try to invite all the single women I know to try to get the singles matched up. It's all good! Don't be so paranoid! Good people like me exist. We are not all out to scam you!
 aliveone1
Joined: 9/4/2008
Msg: 69 (view)
 
Why is it such a stigma to be an older bachelor?
Posted: 2/8/2010 5:35:26 PM
Hey, I prefer to date only men 10-20 years older who have never been married and never had kids. But, you would be hard pressed to find another one like me! And, sorry, I'm already taken. Yup, he sure is a lucky one! lol
 aliveone1
Joined: 9/4/2008
Msg: 64 (view)
 
He likes me...but wont touch me??
Posted: 1/29/2010 8:27:07 PM
Try to find some comfort and humor in this....have you read the thread about people who are in a committed relationship, but tell people they are not? Ironic. You guys are just the opposite: you are not in a committed relationship yet you both tell people you are. Try to laugh with me here!...Honestly, there are SO many things that can go wrong in relationship! I can't believe people still even ATTEMPT to date! I know I don't!

However, if you still feel up to the task, I think you need to ditch this guy and move on.
 aliveone1
Joined: 9/4/2008
Msg: 26 (view)
 
Committment Denial
Posted: 1/29/2010 8:10:45 PM
AH HA! I just figured it out thanks to another thread! Your friends are twin-flames, not soulmates! LOL. I happen to be in a similar relationship. I like this new explanation much better than the derogatory "co-dependency" or "waiting for something better to come along" theories! On the contrary finally uniting with your twin-flame can actually be quite satisfying.
 aliveone1
Joined: 9/4/2008
Msg: 83 (view)
 
Birth Control Pills...PLEASE NEED PEOPLE OPINIONS
Posted: 10/2/2009 8:25:14 PM
Unlikely story, but if it is true it's just one more reason to believe that birth control pills are not an effective and reliable enough form of birth control to be trusted by the masses. Why hasn't she gotten tubal ligation yet? I'm gonna be first in line on my 32nd birthday! (The age that they stop giving you a hard time if you want the procedure done, but have had no children.)
 aliveone1
Joined: 9/4/2008
Msg: 33 (view)
 
how to let him down easy
Posted: 10/2/2009 8:17:41 PM
oh, I just read the update. Good job. Nice and snappy.
 aliveone1
Joined: 9/4/2008
Msg: 32 (view)
 
how to let him down easy
Posted: 10/2/2009 8:15:14 PM
OK, I've got it! Why don't you wait until you've already got a replacement for him to take over his half of the rent with no awkward financial difficulty transition phase. Then introduce the new guy, and say he's moving in, but...awww...there will be no room for all three of you! OK, obviously kidding. I don't think there is any way to make it easy for him, but I'm sure that you can think of something a little less hurtful then the before-mentioned scenario. Better say something, don't delay.
 aliveone1
Joined: 9/4/2008
Msg: 115 (view)
 
How did you lose your first love?
Posted: 10/2/2009 8:05:11 PM
He came out of the closet...wearing rainbow earrings. Yikes.
 aliveone1
Joined: 9/4/2008
Msg: 8 (view)
 
Is just me or is everyone these days having babies and getting married
Posted: 10/2/2009 5:56:15 PM
I agree with Daynadaze. I just turned 30, and I've already seen a lot of my friends get married and divorced and then do the single parenting thing. They struggle in court over child support and about if and when he'll ever take time to spend with his kids. And then there is trying to work out a good relationship with the ex's new wife who they have to see when they drop the kids off....Seriously, be thankful for what you have! Hopefully if you wait, you'll be able to it right the first time! In the meantime, you still have your freedom to go out and enjoy your youth!
 aliveone1
Joined: 9/4/2008
Msg: 105 (view)
 
Agree or Disagree: If a person has a good personality you can make yourself sexually attracted
Posted: 10/2/2009 5:47:08 PM
I think that perhaps this could work if the person's personality includes provacativeness. If I am not really that interested sexually, I am looking to be persuaded, not be the pursuer.
 aliveone1
Joined: 9/4/2008
Msg: 42 (view)
 
Dating the same person
Posted: 10/2/2009 5:37:22 PM
Let me guess...small town?
 aliveone1
Joined: 9/4/2008
Msg: 36 (view)
 
In a relationship, Hanging out with Opposite sex friends makes SO feel uncomfortable
Posted: 7/29/2009 6:10:53 PM
There's no reason you have to ditch your opposite sex friends. What is the problem with hanging out with them in groups?! Big deal. It's not like it's that big of a sacrifice if it would make your SO more at ease. It's just a matter of respect!

Most of my friends are guys. When I'm in a relationship, I make it a point to introduce my SO to everyone. I also invite the guys to the house in groups to hang out with me and my SO. Simply out of respect, I tend not to hang out 1 on 1 with my guy friends when I'm in a relationship, unless I mention it to my SO first and I am absolutley certain that he feels comfortable with it. No reason to put unnecessary stress on a good relationship. It's a natural concern for a SO to have!

When approached in this way, most of my SO have been very comfortable with my guy friends.
 aliveone1
Joined: 9/4/2008
Msg: 68 (view)
 
there will always be the insulted b!t*hes
Posted: 7/10/2009 8:06:12 PM
Wow. I can't belive all of the pure hate being spewed around on both sides of this issue. Now, you see what happens when religion enters stage right? Wow. I was uncomfortable just reading the word whore tossed around so many times. Pure Hate....that's all I gotta say....glad I'm agnostic....
 aliveone1
Joined: 9/4/2008
Msg: 13 (view)
 
Good Girl?
Posted: 7/10/2009 7:19:35 PM
x-file, your perfect girl sounds like the inflatable type. Why didn't you just write, "A girl with no opinions who never opens her mouth unless it is to make me feel better about myself."? Oh, and who genuinely likes sex.
 aliveone1
Joined: 9/4/2008
Msg: 35 (view)
 
What Women Want: The Measure of a Male Partner
Posted: 7/10/2009 6:59:55 PM
Most of these are important to me with a few sticking out as being less important to me:

Doesn't have to have carpentry skills or know how to fix a car because I already do those things myself. If he does, then great, we can do it together, but not a must.

Doesn't have to know how to cook, but if he doesn't know how, he has to be willing to eat mostly microwave dinners...cause I don't know how either! Willingness to learn WITH me is pretty important...Maybe we could take a class or something...lol.

Faith is less important to me because I am agnostic, however the part about striving to always better yourself and be someone who others look up to is very important to me.

Being good with kids would be nice, but is not a must because I won't be having any. Although, someone who would trip a kid just to see 'em cry is a definite NO! A little discomfort around kids is acceptable to me, because I feel the same way. That's one of the many, many reasons I'm not havin' 'em!

Other than that, GREAT LIST! You've got a lot of good ones on there.

I would just also add: Sense of Humor!! Can't get through life without that!!
 aliveone1
Joined: 9/4/2008
Msg: 63 (view)
 
Are women who don't need men likely to ever find one and be happy?
Posted: 7/10/2009 6:26:17 PM
They say that you can only truly find love when you are happy with your life, and happy with yourself. I feel happy with my life. I think if I were to feel that I had some big gaping void, I would be more likely to be desperate. That would make me more likley to latch on to a guy that wasn't good for me or contributing to the relationship in a positve way, just so as not to be alone. A woman who is happy is looking for someone who truly compliments her well. She is able to give in the relationship as well as receive. Wouldn't a man want someone who has more of herself to give?
 aliveone1
Joined: 9/4/2008
Msg: 4 (view)
 
Is it natural for humans to be monogamous?
Posted: 7/10/2009 5:13:26 AM
All I know is that I have never had the inclination to stray when I was in a committed relationship.
 aliveone1
Joined: 9/4/2008
Msg: 42 (view)
 
Why is our ability to cook/clean so important to men?
Posted: 7/8/2009 5:30:05 PM
Just one more reason why the single life is so great...one less slob to pick up after....
 
Show ALL Forums