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 Author Thread: Trying to balance work and relationships
 ducksquat
Joined: 10/26/2005
Msg: 2 (view)
 
Trying to balance work and relationships
Posted: 8/8/2006 8:13:28 PM
That's the problem with your industry whether trucks, trains, buses, planes, etc. It can be done and often is. But you gotta find a woman who can deal with it and is quite independent. Of course, you can always be a sailor with a woman in every port!
 ducksquat
Joined: 10/26/2005
Msg: 1 (view)
 
Past Mating Rituals
Posted: 8/5/2006 8:27:11 PM
I'm just sitting here laughing my donkey off while watching Napoleon Dynamite again for the umpteenth time. It never ceases to amaze me that he feels he needs "skills" like num-chuck skills or drawing skills to impress the women. Great stuff I tell ya!

I remember back in the day (80's) that I thought it had to be muscles so I wore muscle shirts or even mesh shirts to show off my cut body. In addition, I had to go to the clubs and dance to strut my stuff. LOL! To think of how far I came in the past 20 years is quite interesting to say the least. Well, to that, add the toll time took on me. LOL!

So, what did you use to do to impress a potential mate?
 ducksquat
Joined: 10/26/2005
Msg: 5 (view)
 
Sooo...the ex is getting remarried...how do you feel?
Posted: 8/1/2006 6:57:26 PM
It might affect me for all of 5 minutes to reminisce the good and bad times. Then life would go on as it has after the big D.
 ducksquat
Joined: 10/26/2005
Msg: 2 (view)
 
Friend going for your ex
Posted: 8/1/2006 6:17:55 PM
I met my ex-wife through my ex-girlfriend. They were friends and my ex was being supportive of my ex-girlfriend when coming to a party of mine. My ex liked me and got permission from the ex-girlfriend and we started dating. I am not thrilled with either of my exes. So, it's a bad idea! LOL...

Were you able to keep all that straight?
 ducksquat
Joined: 10/26/2005
Msg: 2 (view)
 
similar/different tastes in music
Posted: 7/30/2006 8:20:24 PM
Yes. If the other was so obsessed with their music that it was their life and had little room to let me in, then I'd find it to be a problem. If it's just different tastes in music, who care? I sure don't. But I've known some who lived their life for opera and insisted I had to also. I hate opera as much as I hate soap operas. I wasn't going to give in on that. I would go with her, but she wanted me to go all the time. Blech! She didn't care to go two-stepping or salsa dancing with me so it's about mutual respect.
 ducksquat
Joined: 10/26/2005
Msg: 19 (view)
 
Being Single Rocks
Posted: 7/30/2006 8:18:08 PM
I prefer to share my life with someone. It's not nearly as satisfying for mer personally to experience life myself. Perhaps it's a flaw in my character? Give me a relationship any day of the week instead of being single.
 ducksquat
Joined: 10/26/2005
Msg: 21 (view)
 
Is it me.. or all the good potential people super far away?
Posted: 7/30/2006 10:24:58 AM
2 hours is far? Damn! For me, El Paso is still in my state and an 11 hour drive! I drove to school 9 hours away in my state and that wasn't far. LOL...
 ducksquat
Joined: 10/26/2005
Msg: 2 (view)
 
Married with childern....
Posted: 7/30/2006 10:22:35 AM
I don't have children. But if I dated a woman with them, I would never expect them to call me dad. If they wanted to, that's their decision. Not mine.
 ducksquat
Joined: 10/26/2005
Msg: 37 (view)
 
Help, I need advice!!!
Posted: 7/30/2006 6:42:17 AM
setnimental1, why have you already sent me not one, but THREE messages telling me how superficial and immature I am? Do you realize that you are among the tiny percentage who hasn't seen the blatant humor and sarcasm from my post? Oh my goodness! I must strive to remember that some folks simply are on a different plane of existance than I am.
 ducksquat
Joined: 10/26/2005
Msg: 34 (view)
 
Help, I need advice!!!
Posted: 7/30/2006 6:28:47 AM
I must admit, this thread is a great way to weed out some potential fishies who may not seem to understand my own brand of humor!
 ducksquat
Joined: 10/26/2005
Msg: 1 (view)
 
Help, I need advice!!!
Posted: 7/29/2006 8:09:44 PM
I need your advice, please. I met this girl once and she seemed nice. So, what do I do??? Do I ask her out again or do I dump her??? HELP!!!

 ducksquat
Joined: 10/26/2005
Msg: 20 (view)
 
trust and the internet.,
Posted: 7/29/2006 7:43:24 PM
Trust me. I'm honest. Nuff said.
 ducksquat
Joined: 10/26/2005
Msg: 5 (view)
 
what's going on??
Posted: 7/29/2006 7:38:08 PM
Many failed marriages are from those who married young. They didn't have a real chance to truly spread their wings. I too got married way too young - at 27!!! Had I known then what I know now, waiting would have been much wiser. Don't fret it. I'm 37 now and still dating gals with no kids though I have no problems with the ones that do have 'em. Just haven't dated any with 'em yet as it turns out. It's not a big deal to me since I have no kids of my own. It might even be fun!
 ducksquat
Joined: 10/26/2005
Msg: 2 (view)
 
How would you describe 'LIFE'?
Posted: 7/29/2006 6:04:50 PM
I find Life to be an interesting read. It certainly has a lot of history and often have great photos. It's not something I subscribe to but when I stop by the docs office, I will often be caught reading it.

 ducksquat
Joined: 10/26/2005
Msg: 24 (view)
 
Checking out others when your In Love
Posted: 7/29/2006 4:31:54 PM
okie,

Comprehend what I wrote, not what you want to read. I thought I was quite clear about using understanding versus an excuse regarding your interpretation of this line of logic. Let me ask, do you not think that most priests that practice celibacy do not secretly lust and have a sexual drive? Do you truly and honestly believe that the sexual drive and lust goes into hibernation once you are in love with one? Interesting notion.

Also, how quite simplistic to think that humans aren't a species within the animal kingdom, but I understand some folks are threatened by such a notion. Are you not a mammal? Explain yourself, please.
 ducksquat
Joined: 10/26/2005
Msg: 21 (view)
 
will not settle for less!
Posted: 7/29/2006 4:22:32 PM
I'm a very picky guy so I'll probably get blasted for my stringent requirements:

1. Must be biologically and anatomically female
2. Must have IQ above 30
3. Must be between the ages of 18 and 118

I know, I'll likely never find Mrs. Right with my attitude. Sigh.
 ducksquat
Joined: 10/26/2005
Msg: 8 (view)
 
Checking out others when your In Love
Posted: 7/29/2006 11:31:28 AM
I have a hard time believing this. We are merely a different species in the animal kingdom. Some of us possess more testosterone than others so more of us are likely to be less inhibited to look at the opposite sex and "lust" - it's not a perversion, but simply nature. Now, that's not an excuse to act like a pig, but it's an explanation as to why it's normal for many.

So, perhaps for some, it is true - they may not possess a certain amount of natural chemicals to have such desires. I know I do. But when in love, I'll never act out on those desires and will always keep them to myself and not make it obvious. After all, it's okay to window shop as long as we no longer handle the other merchandise.
 ducksquat
Joined: 10/26/2005
Msg: 16 (view)
 
Would you date a women bigger and more muscular then you?
Posted: 7/28/2006 4:35:37 PM
Hey, makes bedtime fun, I'm sure! At 6'3", if they are taller and more muscular, that can only mean that should procreate, I might be set with a future pro athlete in football or basketball!!! WOOHOO!!!
 ducksquat
Joined: 10/26/2005
Msg: 7 (view)
 
Lookin'
Posted: 7/28/2006 4:32:14 PM
Have you tried a nursing home? I bet they are chock full of 'em!
 ducksquat
Joined: 10/26/2005
Msg: 7 (view)
 
Will I have to compromise?
Posted: 7/27/2006 7:00:51 PM
Compromise is the essence of a good and strong relationship. Learn to pick and choose your battles and know for certain the few things you cannot nor want to deal with. Just don't settle and you'll be fine.
 ducksquat
Joined: 10/26/2005
Msg: 34 (view)
 
What do you do with the ring?
Posted: 7/26/2006 10:10:06 PM
FWIW, I never said I was still dating her. And the ring still sits in my nightstand drawer. I don't get suckered easily into playing jealousy games.
 ducksquat
Joined: 10/26/2005
Msg: 21 (view)
 
What do you do with the ring?
Posted: 7/26/2006 6:45:30 AM
But, isn't it just another memento that really just follows with you serving no purpose? And then, when you look at it, perhaps it reminds you of the times whether for better or for worse? What's the point? I just haven't gotten rid of it and am too cheap to sell it for too cheap. But perhaps, some money for it is better than none. I don't know... I wonder how much it would cost to have it converted into something totally different?
 ducksquat
Joined: 10/26/2005
Msg: 12 (view)
 
What do you do with the ring?
Posted: 7/25/2006 8:53:20 PM
Where exactly did you do that? I have a friend with a metal detector and I could use the spare change.
 ducksquat
Joined: 10/26/2005
Msg: 35 (view)
 
Will you ever marry again?
Posted: 7/25/2006 8:50:57 PM
Will I ever marry again? That depends on whether I find the right person or not. I will never again settle for anything less than what I feel I deserve. I'm a good person with a lot of attention to give but as I learned the hard way, the other person has to give as much as I do or it's simply one sided. I'm hopeful that I'll remarry again but I never want to go through divorce again so I will need to feel really good about the woman.
 ducksquat
Joined: 10/26/2005
Msg: 20 (view)
 
Name one thing....I have more than one..........
Posted: 7/25/2006 8:33:59 PM
I'm a better person for having been with my ex-wife. I learned from my mistakes - we both did. I am a better person today than I was 10 years ago, easily.

The song for me that fits the bill is "Better Man" by Clint Black:

What do you say when it's over?
I don't know if I should say anything at all
One day we're rollin' in the clover
Next thing you know we take the fall

Still, I think about the years since I first met you
And the way it might have been without you here
And I don't know if words from me can still upset you
But I've just gotta make this memory stand clear

I know I'm leavin' here a better man
For knowin' you this way
Things I couldn't do before, now I think I can
And I'm leavin here a better man

I guess I always knew I couldn't hold you
But I'd never be the one to set you free
Just like some old nursery rhyme your mama told you
You still believe in some old meant-to-be

Still, I'm leavin' here a better man...
 ducksquat
Joined: 10/26/2005
Msg: 7 (view)
 
Mementos from the Past?
Posted: 7/25/2006 8:29:21 PM
I kept all my old girlfriends love letter, mementos and jazz. Then, when I got divorced and had to move, I decided it was stupid. I never look at them. They just take up space. It's not like they are worth anything as they age and I have no aspirations of being the President of the U.S. so it'll have worth. So, what's the point in keeping junk?
 ducksquat
Joined: 10/26/2005
Msg: 1 (view)
 
What do you do with the ring?
Posted: 7/25/2006 8:27:51 PM
A few months ago, a girl I dated was upset that I still had my wedding band. She found out because she asked me if I still had it and I'm not one to lie. What's the point? Now, I've been divorced for around a year or so and have not worn is since then. It's kept in my nightstand. I have no desire to get rid of it but I don't exactly do anything with it either. Thought about selling it but I'll get so little out of it that I wonder if it's even worth the trouble.

Should the girl I dated back then have been upset that I had it? I don't think so. Should I get rid of it? For those of you who are divorced, what have you done with your old ring and why did you do it?
 ducksquat
Joined: 10/26/2005
Msg: 1 (view)
 
Paranoia Will Destroy Ya
Posted: 7/24/2006 9:42:08 PM
Stop the paranoia. Stop the suspicion. Stop the jealousy. And, stop the insanity! If you find yourself doing any of the above, stop the relationship.

This public service announcement was brought to you by Susan Powter.

Carry on.
 ducksquat
Joined: 10/26/2005
Msg: 26 (view)
 
what is unconditional love to u?
Posted: 7/24/2006 9:37:31 PM
My ex believed that love had to be earned. I believed that it could be unconditional. We split a long time ago. To this day I don't know who is right. But I do know that despite her flaws, I loved her till the end of the relationship and still care abour her to this day though not romantically anymore.
 ducksquat
Joined: 10/26/2005
Msg: 15 (view)
 
Why Men Love Bitches
Posted: 7/24/2006 9:34:10 PM
Perhaps some wouldn't have to go through the school of hard knocks if they read a book here and there. Hmm... books taught me how to give the best damned massages in the world and have a woman go tantric! School of hard knocks taught me that Virgos and Aries are bad matches. Had I read about it beforehand, perhaps I might have circumvented 10 years of a less-than-stellar relationship.
 ducksquat
Joined: 10/26/2005
Msg: 3 (view)
 
Church// Goood one..LOL
Posted: 7/23/2006 2:17:07 PM
I guess it's all about your level of religious and his. Some folks never miss it for the world while others do the big 2 holidays and others yet despise organized religion.
 ducksquat
Joined: 10/26/2005
Msg: 12 (view)
 
Does the internet encourage people to cheat?
Posted: 7/23/2006 8:55:34 AM
The internet is simply a way to connect computer to computer. It cannot encourage nor discourage anything. Everything we do is from within. Does a candy bar encourage obesity? Does a pencil encourage writing?

Any action taken is the sole responsibility of the individual. If a relationship is weak to begin with, then the person can become a cheat no matter what the means are.
 ducksquat
Joined: 10/26/2005
Msg: 10 (view)
 
Forgive and forget? Do you really mean it?
Posted: 7/23/2006 8:52:38 AM
I can forgive. I cannot forget. I also know that I am to blame many times for the other to require "forgiveness". But unless someone finds a way to eat my brain, those memories last and linger forever. It may not be of consequence, but it is still there nonetheless.
 ducksquat
Joined: 10/26/2005
Msg: 10 (view)
 
If Italian need not apply
Posted: 7/22/2006 8:16:47 AM
Actually, rainbow is probably right. She must have had a bad experience with an Italian or more and it's emblazoned into her psyche. It's well within her right whether we feel it is warranted or not. I don't know how many times I come across people wanting their same ethnicity only. I do not understand this concept since I'm a mixed breed, but that doesn't make their preference wrong either. It's just that - their preference.
 ducksquat
Joined: 10/26/2005
Msg: 1 (view)
 
Most Embarrassing First Date
Posted: 7/19/2006 9:14:02 PM
What's your most embarrassing moment on a first date?

Mine would have to be the time that I was into body building and that meant pure healthy diet with all natural stuff. Well, we went to an Italian restaurant and I ordered some kind of manicotti dish. It had a lot of cheese suffice it to say and I wasn't used to it in quite awhile. After about an hour, my stomach turned inside out and I had the worst gas pains I can ever remember. Well, she wasn't too impressed but we wound up together for 10 years. I think that gas should have been an omen!
 ducksquat
Joined: 10/26/2005
Msg: 7 (view)
 
what to do?
Posted: 7/16/2006 8:21:32 AM
I suggest you see a psychologist. It seems that you have little to no self-esteem. No self-respecting person gets involved in anything like that and still continues to obsess over it. Sometimes, the truth simply sucks.
 ducksquat
Joined: 10/26/2005
Msg: 1 (view)
 
Health Disclosure
Posted: 7/16/2006 7:48:59 AM
How important it is to discuss health history with your new partner in detail? Does it make a difference in how you feel about proceeding with the relationship?
 ducksquat
Joined: 10/26/2005
Msg: 6 (view)
 
can a guy really fall in love in 3 weeks?
Posted: 7/7/2006 11:54:20 PM
I'll tell you why it can be a pain. Some of us can fall in love way quicker than many woman do with men. Don't know why but there's a scientific explanation in there somewhere. It can be a pain because often times we do not feel the feelings are mutual nor reciprocated. For me, I pretty much know quickly if someone I'm with is someone I truly have feelings for and want to go into a higher level of the relationship. It sucks when the other is so guarded and slow and suspicious. Though they may have good reason to be, it still sucks nonetheless. Having said that, I know I must be more patient with many women who are slower to develop emotional attachments. We're different species all together!
 ducksquat
Joined: 10/26/2005
Msg: 9 (view)
 
What if...
Posted: 7/7/2006 9:51:00 PM
No one here's heard of a nubbin? OMG! Here's what wikipedia says about it:


A supernumerary nipple (also known as a third nipple, accessory nipple, nubbin, polythelia or polymastia) is an additional nipple occurring in mammals including humans. Often mistaken for moles, supernumerary nipples are diagnosed at a rate of 2% in females, less in males. The nipples appear along the two vertical "milk lines", which start in the armpit on each side, run down through the typical nipples and end at the groin. They are classified into eight levels of completeness from a simple patch of hair to a milk-bearing breast in miniature. Polythelia refers to the presence of an additional nipple alone while polymastia denotes the much rarer presence of additional mammary glands.
 ducksquat
Joined: 10/26/2005
Msg: 5 (view)
 
What if...
Posted: 7/7/2006 9:49:17 PM
nubbin = accessory nipple
 ducksquat
Joined: 10/26/2005
Msg: 1 (view)
 
What if...
Posted: 7/7/2006 9:44:16 PM
Okay, you find the gal/guy of your dreams and its long-distance. You chat/talk for a few months and finally one flies to meet the other. Would you freak out if you found out the other had a nubbin? If so, how do you react and do you continue to see this person?
 ducksquat
Joined: 10/26/2005
Msg: 25 (view)
 
What do you guys think about distance?
Posted: 7/7/2006 9:41:24 PM
Distance is only a measurement tool between space. Why let some measurement stop you from the potential love of your life? Makes no sense to me.
 ducksquat
Joined: 10/26/2005
Msg: 15 (view)
 
Am I in love with being single ????
Posted: 7/7/2006 9:34:27 PM
Being single is better than going through a divorce. Remember that young pup!
 ducksquat
Joined: 10/26/2005
Msg: 7 (view)
 
a new branch on the why men don't say I love you thread
Posted: 7/7/2006 9:30:07 PM
I've learned its best to tell a woman you love her when you first see her. It's good policy. They really like it a lot. I mean... A LOT!
 ducksquat
Joined: 10/26/2005
Msg: 7 (view)
 
should one change in a relationship
Posted: 7/2/2006 9:48:27 PM
It's the man who usually has to do the changing for the woman, thus meaning the man must then make the woman believe he's changing. Big diff...
 ducksquat
Joined: 10/26/2005
Msg: 21 (view)
 
She is 100% Oppisite of what I thought...
Posted: 7/1/2006 9:08:23 AM
Jethro, what gives you the right to state that you have power over this girl so that if she harms herself, it's your fault. Are you telling me you control her with your actions regarding staying with her or not? That's a rather brash statement! That means she has no control over her own actions. Is that a relationship worth having? Not for me. I have no power over a person's thought process. Everyone is responsible for their feelings, thoughts and actions except for the mentally ill who are seriously deficient in this area - but, they can be taught to be responsible for their behaviors too.
 ducksquat
Joined: 10/26/2005
Msg: 25 (view)
 
Determining your partner's friends...
Posted: 7/1/2006 9:03:24 AM
A lot of times I'll simply ask hypothetical questions for the sake of debate. This is one of those times. I've never told a partner she couldn't have a certain friend ever. But, I'm sure there might be circumstances where it might be reasonable to do so. Again, this was purely hypothetical as several of my questions have been in the past.
 ducksquat
Joined: 10/26/2005
Msg: 2 (view)
 
She is 100% Oppisite of what I thought...
Posted: 7/1/2006 12:37:43 AM
To me, if you are that alarmed about her situation in terms of your relationship, I see no problem why you couldn't let her know that you need to back off and give her room to work through her issues before proceeding any further. It gives her a chance to work through her stuff and you a chance to see how you truly feel about her and whether you want to continue or not. If she's not cool with this, then you need to determine whether or not you want to continue the relationship or not.

It sucks when someone you care about is hurting and confused. But, you are also in the relationship and have to think about yourself too. I see no problem with the compromise I proposed though it's just something I might do depending on the situation.
 ducksquat
Joined: 10/26/2005
Msg: 1 (view)
 
Determining your partner's friends...
Posted: 7/1/2006 12:32:38 AM
Is it ever OK to tell your partner they aren't allowed to keep someone as their friend?
 ducksquat
Joined: 10/26/2005
Msg: 3 (view)
 
Music stages in relationships...what songs come to mind?
Posted: 7/1/2006 12:16:49 AM
J. Geils Band - "Love Stinks" comes to mind.

You love her
But she loves him
And he loves somebody else
You just can't win
And so it goes
Till the day you die
This thing they call love
It's gonna make you cry
I've had the blues
The reds and the pinks
One thing for sure

(Love stinks)
Love stinks yeah yeah
(Love stinks)
Love stinks yeah yeah
(Love stinks)
Love stinks yeah yeah
(Love stinks)
Love stinks yeah yeah

Two by two and side by side
Love's gonna find you yes it is
You just can't hide
You'll hear it call
Your heart will fall
Then love will fly
It's gonna soar
I don't care for any casanova thing
All I can say is
Love stinks

(Love stinks)
Love stinks yeah yeah
(Love stinks)
Love stinks yeah yeah
(Love stinks)
Love stinks yeah yeah
(Love stinks)
Love stinks yeah yeah

I've been through diamonds
I've been through minks
I've been through it all
Love stinks

(Love stinks)
Love stinks yeah yeah
(Love stinks)
Love stinks yeah yeah
(Love stinks)
Love stinks yeah yeah
(Love stinks)
Love stinks yeah yeah
 
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